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1
00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:10,720
Miss, I want to run for head girl.
2
00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:15,719
Lovely. Deadline was yesterday.
Please shut the door.
3
00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:18,800
Yeah, but I was off sick yesterday
so... Oh, cry me a river.
4
00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:22,759
I can't go moving
dates around willy-nilly,
5
00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:25,239
else everyone will want
special treatment, won't they?
6
00:00:25,240 --> 00:00:27,320
Well, it could just be our little
secret.
7
00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:31,560
Don't do that.
8
00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:36,079
Rules are rules, and anyway,
these things,
9
00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:37,959
they're a popularity contest.
10
00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:40,280
Not to say that you're not popular
but, erm...
11
00:00:41,480 --> 00:00:44,239
All right, let's not beat
around the bush, you're not popular.
12
00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:46,759
Cheers, miss. Come on. Get real.
13
00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:49,279
I've got the likes of
Poppy Cruickshank in the running.
14
00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:51,319
It would be David and Goliath.
15
00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:52,919
Yeah, but popular girls shouldn't
16
00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:55,239
just automatically get it anyway.
It's not fair.
17
00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:58,079
Oh, maybe you'll get a Filofax and
start adhering to deadlines then.
18
00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:00,879
What use is a Filofax? People
in the running for head girl.
19
00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:02,520
Now, if there's nothing else...
20
00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,519
This is discrimination.
21
00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:07,000
No, it's not.
22
00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:14,879
Can I just say one more thing?
Oh, good God, what?
23
00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:17,639
This school, right, has been crying
out for the voice of the many
24
00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:19,680
and that's me, me.
25
00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:23,399
Come on. Just do it as an
experiment,
26
00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:25,039
see if I get the others to
work harder.
27
00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:26,960
That's two things.
28
00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:31,040
Campaign speeches are next week.
29
00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:35,039
Don't let me down
and don't embarrass yourself.
30
00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:36,799
I won't, I promise.
31
00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:39,240
Thank you so much.
Yeah, please get out.
32
00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:03,519
..I wouldn't call myself an expert.
I would argue no-one can truly
33
00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:06,679
call themselves a film fan if they
haven't watched an Almodovar.
34
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,319
Oh, please, that's ludicrous.
I didn't say you have to like them.
35
00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:11,719
But you've got to be fluent in
their artistic currency.
36
00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:15,359
Travis, favourite film? Erm...
37
00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:17,560
I've always really liked
Moulin Rouge.
38
00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,559
You've got to be joking. No.
39
00:02:21,560 --> 00:02:25,999
That was a great film. Arty.
Arty is one word.
40
00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:28,039
Derivative's another.
41
00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:31,600
Trav, Mrs Blocker wants to
see you in her office. Why?
42
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:36,239
She caught you on the CCTV wearing
your trainers. Oh, for God's sake.
43
00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:38,239
Erm...
44
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:39,960
Right, I'll see you in a bit, boys.
45
00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:49,719
You're welcome. Oh, you dickhead,
I was bricking it.
46
00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:53,399
Well, I had to be cruel to be kind,
didn't I?
47
00:02:53,400 --> 00:02:56,839
Right, do you want to help me
make some posters? What for?
48
00:02:56,840 --> 00:03:00,759
I'm so crap at this stuff. Hm.
Yeah, I can see that.
49
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,679
HE SCOFFS
50
00:03:02,680 --> 00:03:06,559
By the way, I wanted to say
sorry for the other day.
51
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:09,399
Just for the other day? Because
you've been a dick for weeks, babe.
52
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:11,160
Yeah, well, all right,
give us offence.
53
00:03:14,640 --> 00:03:18,719
Will you forgive me if I buy you
a Club bar? Maybe.
54
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:20,119
Thanks.
55
00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:23,759
On a completely different topic,
erm,
56
00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:26,000
can I borrow �1.50?
57
00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:30,839
Please. You're a twat.
58
00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:34,279
Have you spoken to Lyds?
Yeah. Well, no, I haven't.
59
00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:38,840
I texted her but she just replied
with three middle-finger emojis.
60
00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:42,759
Yeah, I know. She's pissed.
She's so pissed.
61
00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:43,919
Right, show me them.
62
00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:46,719
Right, yeah. I don't know, this is
what I've got. I mean...
63
00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,679
THEY LAUGH
64
00:03:48,680 --> 00:03:50,479
No, that's shit. Ohhh!
65
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,679
That's a bit harsh.
No, it's not funny. What?
66
00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:55,519
I can't put that round the school.
I'm a strong independent woman.
67
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:58,639
..future, that's just fact, there
won't be jobs for any of us,
68
00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,839
within ten years, we'll just...
Peter.
69
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,680
Hey, erm, can you help us with this?
70
00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:08,119
Please. I'm hardly going to say yes
before I know the terms.
71
00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:11,119
All right, chill out, I'm not going
to ask you to sign a contract.
72
00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,799
Just help with these posters. Oh!
73
00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:14,520
Very droll.
74
00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:20,399
Done. Easy.
75
00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:22,999
Oh, my God. Peter, you're a ledge.
76
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,839
But don't think this
secures my vote,
77
00:04:24,840 --> 00:04:27,839
I will remain impartial until I have
considered all policies.
78
00:04:27,840 --> 00:04:29,199
BELL RINGS
79
00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:31,519
Right. There we go.
That's that one done.
80
00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:33,599
Nice. Right.
81
00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:36,239
Babe. What's all this?
82
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:38,479
She's running for head girl.
I'm running for head girl.
83
00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:40,999
Oh, my goodness, good for you,
babe. Thanks.
84
00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,880
But what about the deadline?
You missed it, right?
85
00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:47,759
Oh, that... It doesn't matter to me,
I'm just...
86
00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:49,479
I'm so proud of you, Beth.
87
00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:51,480
Good luck.
88
00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:54,999
Gosh, she's a rotten apple.
89
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:56,919
All right, Grandma.
90
00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:58,560
Jesus! Shut up!
91
00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:02,119
Hi, Beth. What?
92
00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:05,319
Can I take some of those? I'll put
'em up for you. Thanks.
93
00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:06,640
Here, take a few.
94
00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:11,280
Beth?
95
00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:14,320
Beat the bitch. Sorry?
96
00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:17,760
You heard me.
97
00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:21,800
Bye.
98
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:24,880
Bye.
99
00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:37,799
Excuse me. Hi.
100
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,479
Sorry, I'm just looking for Trina.
101
00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:42,319
I think she was watching the telly.
OK.
102
00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,000
I'm going that way, I'll take you.
OK.
103
00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:52,039
Are you her daughter? Yeah.
104
00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:55,959
Yes, Bethan, she's been telling me
all about you. Really?
105
00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:58,839
Yeah, you're going to be a Hollywood
star, apparently. Oh, God, no.
106
00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:01,519
I don't know about that!
THEY LAUGH
107
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:04,799
I've healed you now, so you can get
on the floor if you want.
108
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:06,279
Piss off.
109
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:09,679
Oh, Beth!
Where have you been? To school.
110
00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:12,879
School. Busy? Yeah. Oh!
111
00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:17,439
I've got myself in a bit of hot
water. Why? Mmm.
112
00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:19,759
See that woman over there?
113
00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:23,159
Just promised to buy her
a brand-new Ferrari. Oh!
114
00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:26,359
Writing cheques my arse can't cash.
Cup of tea? No.
115
00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:27,399
No, I don't want that.
116
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,319
Ah, backwash.
117
00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:31,480
So, how do you feel?
118
00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:37,039
Yeah, great.
It's like a five-star hotel in here.
119
00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:40,559
No, but, I mean, like, what's going
on in your head? Everything.
120
00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:43,959
Yeah. Well, I can read the Bible
and enjoy it and I can drink hot
121
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,599
and cold tea and enjoy that too.
Mam, no, don't drink...
122
00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:48,840
Someone's drunk out of that.
Don't drink it.
123
00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:52,759
Listen. Huh?
124
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:55,439
I'm going to run for this election
thing in school. Mm.
125
00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:57,239
Like Margaret Thatcher?
126
00:06:57,240 --> 00:06:59,799
No, Mam, no.
127
00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:04,759
Basically, if I... if you get it,
you become the face of the school
128
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:06,879
so I've got to do this speech
in front of...
129
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:09,639
Remember when you did a play and you
were sick, vomited everywhere?
130
00:07:09,640 --> 00:07:11,679
You was a wreck. Yeah,
I remember that, yeah.
131
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:14,439
It's not like that.
Oh, hold on a minute.
132
00:07:14,440 --> 00:07:16,400
Just got to tune my brain in, Beth.
133
00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:26,479
What are you doing, Trina,
you all right?
134
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,439
No, it's just a cleaner.
135
00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:30,799
Mam, shush.
You can't say that, that's rude.
136
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:34,400
Gasping for a cup of tea.
Oh, Mam, that's... Oh...
137
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:39,039
Disgusting?
138
00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:40,720
It's very nice, thank you. OK.
139
00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:48,720
What is he doing up there?
Don't care. He can stay up there.
140
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,359
What's some good policies?
141
00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:54,839
What did you want
when you were in school, Nan?
142
00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:58,359
All I cared about was necking boys.
Oh.
143
00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:03,120
It's true. Duncan Gibbert made me
go weak at the knees. Stop it.
144
00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:08,319
Look, you don't need all this
bollocks, you're a lovely girl.
145
00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:12,439
You just stand up there and say,
"I'm beautiful, everybody vote for me."
146
00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:15,599
You smoking crack?
Not lately, no.
147
00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:18,159
BETHAN LAUGHS
148
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:23,639
Go and tell him his tea's ready.
He won't come. Right.
149
00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:28,319
I'll go tell him and you are coming
with me. No, I'm not. You're coming.
150
00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:30,919
Please, I don't want to see him.
Come on.
151
00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:32,800
LOUD KNOCKING
152
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:37,240
Dil, I'm coming in. Not now, Mam.
153
00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:42,239
Come and have some dinner.
Just get out, Mam.
154
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:44,599
Get out!
155
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,320
I told you.
156
00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:54,920
Hey.
157
00:09:01,680 --> 00:09:05,079
Whoa. How many farts have
you done in here?
158
00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,360
It stinks.
159
00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:10,640
TV ON IN BACKGROUND
160
00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:19,679
Can you not? That's my last one.
161
00:09:19,680 --> 00:09:21,360
Twat.
162
00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:29,439
What are you watching?
163
00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:31,439
Cats Kingdom. Why?
164
00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,440
Do you want something? Yeah.
165
00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:38,279
I miss you.
166
00:09:38,280 --> 00:09:40,639
I've been worried about you.
Well, I'm fine, so you can go.
167
00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:43,999
You don't come to school and you look
like shit so... I look like shit?
168
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,440
Yeah.
Look in the mirror.
169
00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:51,160
My mum's at a conference anyway so
I'm obviously going to knock off.
170
00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:53,600
Guess what?
171
00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:58,319
Shereen Hammer and JD Jenkins had
sex in a graveyard.
172
00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,559
Like, on a grave.
173
00:10:00,560 --> 00:10:02,679
Can you imagine the corpse
underneath being like,
174
00:10:02,680 --> 00:10:03,920
"Are you taking the p...?"?
175
00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:12,439
Do you reckon you'll be
there on Wednesday?
176
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:13,839
Dunno.
177
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:16,520
Cos I'm doing my speech
for head girl.
178
00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:21,040
Yeah. And I need you and Trav
there because I'm shitting myself.
179
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:24,839
What?
180
00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:27,400
That is suicide.
181
00:10:29,560 --> 00:10:31,240
Yeah, maybe.
182
00:10:34,560 --> 00:10:37,720
Will you vote for me, though?
Pff, no.
183
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:42,480
I'm going out now so...
184
00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:47,040
OK, I'll go.
185
00:10:52,920 --> 00:10:55,400
I'm so sorry about what
Tony Chippy did to you.
186
00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:59,400
I know you feel like a piece
of shit, but you're not.
187
00:11:01,080 --> 00:11:03,079
You're wicked. You're...
188
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,040
..amazing,
you're funny and... I love you.
189
00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:09,160
Oi!
190
00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:22,399
DOOR CLOSES
191
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:24,519
Vote for Bethan.
Vote for Bethan.
192
00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:26,839
Do you s...? Why's she laughing?
That was a bit rude.
193
00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:28,639
Vote for Bethan. Vote for Bethan.
194
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:30,319
Vote for Bethan, mate.
195
00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:33,079
Trav, I printed 100 of these.
No-one's taken one.
196
00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:36,199
Free flapjack if you vote for me.
Look at the state of her.
197
00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,359
Corrupt already.
198
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:41,039
Be honest. No-one is going to vote
for me, are they?
199
00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:42,959
LAUGHTER What the fuck?
200
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:44,799
You just got dog pooed. Oh, my God!
201
00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:47,239
Is it on me? Is it on me?
No, it's on ME, you twat!
202
00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,039
It stinks. Is it on you?
Do you see what I mean, though?
203
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:52,119
We're being shat on,
it's embarrassing.
204
00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:54,559
Right, none of the pupils are going
to vote for you, babe.
205
00:11:54,560 --> 00:11:57,399
But the teachers make up 50% of
the vote, don't they? So if you
206
00:11:57,400 --> 00:12:00,359
get them on board... No. ..you may
stand a chance. No. No. Go on.
207
00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:02,879
Go in the staffroom. Please don't.
I've said no.
208
00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:04,519
Trav!
KNOCKS ON DOOR
209
00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,559
Please don't. I asked you not to.
Yeah, but it'll be fine.
210
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:10,239
You're causing a scene now.
I'm not causing a scene. See.
211
00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:12,079
SHE SIGHS Avon calling.
212
00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:13,679
What do you guttersnipes want, hm?
213
00:12:13,680 --> 00:12:16,159
Well, Bethan is on the campaign
trail and she'd love to run
214
00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:18,599
the teachers through her policies,
wouldn't you, Beth?
215
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,639
I'm trying to eat my bagel here
so... 60 seconds.
216
00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:23,039
That's all we'll take
and then we'll be right out of here.
217
00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:24,719
All right. Enter.
218
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,559
Make it pithy. OK.
219
00:12:26,560 --> 00:12:27,960
We're in.
220
00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:40,880
So, these two want to chew our ears
off. Come on, then, let's hear it.
221
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,279
I'm running for head girl
222
00:12:46,280 --> 00:12:48,319
and I wondered if I could count on
your vote.
223
00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:49,639
It all depends, doesn't it?
224
00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:53,679
You scratchy our backies,
we scratchy yours and all that.
225
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:57,559
Basically, I'm going to pledge
for the canteen to go plastic free.
226
00:12:57,560 --> 00:12:59,279
Ooh, boring. Or did you just steal
227
00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:02,199
that off of every single poster down
the corridor, did you?
228
00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:03,759
No. No, I didn't, actually.
229
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,639
No. I called the current suppliers
to price it up and they're actually
230
00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:10,799
more expensive than the ones
offering compostable packaging.
231
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:12,319
Not bad.
232
00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:14,399
See, you nearly lost me there
but then you reeled me
233
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:18,239
back in like a little fish on a
little dish. Props to you.
234
00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:20,519
SHE SNIFFS
235
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:21,759
Right. Time's up.
236
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:23,799
Can I give you one of these?
237
00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:25,319
No. No.
238
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:27,079
THEY GIBBER
239
00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:30,959
Get all those muscles relaxed.
Yeah. Just let it go. Oh! What...?
240
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:32,559
How does it help my speech?
241
00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:35,519
Cos if you're relaxed, then
people are going to listen to you.
242
00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:38,799
Like as if you are just watching
the telly. Get your tongue out.
243
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,639
That's it.
244
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:42,679
Cunnilingus. Focus.
245
00:13:42,680 --> 00:13:45,239
Focus. Seriously!
246
00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:46,759
Repeat after me.
247
00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:49,559
Betty Botter bought some butter but
she said the butter's bitter...
248
00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:50,999
Who the fuck is Betty?
249
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,280
THEY EXHALE
250
00:13:54,920 --> 00:13:56,559
Brrrrrrr.
251
00:13:56,560 --> 00:13:58,559
BOTH: Aaaaaaaaaaaah.
252
00:13:58,560 --> 00:14:00,319
Hit me.
253
00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:01,479
Come on.
254
00:14:01,480 --> 00:14:04,399
My fellow Year 11s... Eye contact,
babe!
255
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:07,319
My name is Bethan Gwyndaf
256
00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:09,159
and I'm here to recruit you.
257
00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:15,039
I can't forget the looks on the
faces of people who have lost hope.
258
00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:19,719
If I can be elected, it's a green
light, it says dare to hope
259
00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:22,879
and you and you and you,
you have to give people hope.
260
00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,479
Is that the speech from Milk, babe?
What, you've seen it?
261
00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:29,239
Yeah, of course I have. Everyone
has. It's good. It's really good.
262
00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:31,519
It's really good.
It's just not really you.
263
00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:33,839
What...? The speeches are tomorrow!
264
00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:36,359
Well, I... What am I meant to do?
Well, it's fine, we can just
265
00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,479
work on it... It's not fine.
We can go through it.
266
00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:41,639
I've just wasted, like, the last
however many hours doing nothing in
267
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:45,039
a field, embarrassing myself, for
you to say it doesn't sound like me.
268
00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:48,159
Hope for a better place to... Oh.
269
00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:50,359
SHE MUMBLES
270
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:51,959
Hope for a better place to come to,
271
00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:54,240
if the pressures at home are too
great.
272
00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:10,400
HE SLAMS DOOR
273
00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:14,360
I could cry when I hear you
talk like that.
274
00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:17,680
You're going to go far, my girl.
275
00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:23,039
OK, settle down.
276
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,519
Come on, take your seats.
277
00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:29,079
We will be starting in five minutes
with the female candidates.
278
00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:32,159
You have to line up near me.
279
00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:33,400
Female candidates.
280
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,000
Settle down.
281
00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:41,800
Shut it!
282
00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:45,960
Jonesy, in your own time.
283
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:57,200
SHE TAKES DEEP BREATHS
284
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:02,839
First candidate to welcome to
the stage, please,
285
00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:05,079
it is Sarah Zygmund.
286
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:07,640
APPLAUSE
287
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:29,239
Give me an L!
288
00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:30,319
ALL: L!
289
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,319
Give me another L!
ALL: L!
290
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:33,399
Give me an A!
291
00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:34,759
OK, that's quite enough of that.
292
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,399
I'd like to get home today before
lunchtime. Isn't it? All right.
293
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:40,839
Now, we have Poppy Cruickshank.
294
00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:43,400
CHEERING
295
00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:49,999
We love you, Poppy!
296
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,719
I love you too!
297
00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:53,679
Right, first things first.
298
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,639
Llanfair High School is the best.
Woohoo!
299
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,759
CHEERING
300
00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:01,520
CHANTING: Llanfair, Llanfair!
301
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,559
OK, OK, OK!
302
00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:07,239
Be serious now, guys.
303
00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:09,119
It would be an honour to
work for you all.
304
00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:11,039
And, truly, my door will always
be open.
305
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:15,239
I want you to come to me with any
problems, and we'll fix it together.
306
00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:17,560
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
307
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:25,319
Now, your final candidate to
take to the stage,
308
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:29,160
please welcome Bethan Gwyndaf.
309
00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:54,640
Hi.
310
00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:57,279
Sorry.
311
00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:58,399
Hurry up, love!
312
00:17:58,400 --> 00:17:59,920
LAUGHTER
313
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:03,280
My name is Bethan Gwyndaf.
314
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:06,439
And I'm here to...
315
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:08,639
..to recruit you.
316
00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:10,640
SNORTS OF LAUGHTER
317
00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:17,120
LAUGHTER
318
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,839
Forget a speech.
319
00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:39,400
I'm just going to cut to the chase.
320
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:46,439
Vote for me and I pledge to fix
the toilet seats.
321
00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:48,919
You know, the deathly ones
that look normal
322
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:51,680
but are actually split down
the middle, yeah?
323
00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:56,919
No longer will you lower down for
a morning steamer, praying to
324
00:18:56,920 --> 00:19:00,399
Jesus that the toilet seat won't,
you know, bite you on the bum.
325
00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:01,719
LAUGHTER
326
00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:03,159
Dogs bite.
327
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:04,559
Toilet seats shouldn't.
328
00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:06,039
Do dykes bite, fatty?
329
00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:08,119
Button it, Priest!
330
00:19:08,120 --> 00:19:10,079
I tell you what, Priest,
331
00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:12,399
shall I just get it all out the way
now, yeah?
332
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:13,479
Yeah, go on, then.
333
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:14,519
I'm not cool.
334
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,719
I'm not skinny.
335
00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:18,159
And you don't want to jizz on me.
336
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:19,279
LAUGHTER
337
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:20,799
Do you want to add anything else?
338
00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:22,639
Eh... Yeah.
339
00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:23,999
You've got blancmange tits.
340
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:27,999
Can we stop this semen
and breast talk, please?
341
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,959
LAUGHTER
342
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:34,079
Next up, I want to know who the hell
came up with the idea that
343
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:36,919
pupils aren't allowed in
during break times.
344
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:40,239
We're out there like soggy rats
getting trenchfoot,
345
00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:42,919
while the teachers, yeah,
they're living it up like it's
346
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:45,559
Club Tropicana in the staffroom.
347
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:49,279
So the empty maths hut
round the back -
348
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,879
let's change it into a common room.
349
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:54,959
If we don't like something,
let's change it.
350
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:58,600
This is our school and our lives,
and we choose what we do with it.
351
00:19:59,920 --> 00:20:03,440
For too long the school has voted
in popular kids because, well...
352
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:05,760
..we've always done it, but...
353
00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:11,840
..being real, sometimes popular
people are two-faced.
354
00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:16,919
They only bother being nice
when they want something,
355
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:21,119
when the truth is
they don't care about us.
356
00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:25,559
They think they can use us,
but I say not today.
357
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:27,639
Not ever.
358
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:29,599
Look, I'm not going to wang on.
359
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:35,880
You can do what you've always done,
or you can vote for change, AKA me.
360
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:39,839
Right, lads, vote with your heads,
361
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:41,239
not your dicks.
362
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,079
Oh, all right now, that's enough...
LAUGHTER
363
00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:45,639
Peace out.
364
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:48,080
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
365
00:20:51,120 --> 00:20:52,519
Well, how did it go?
366
00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:54,159
It was all right.
Do you think you got it?
367
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,479
I don't know. I have to wait till
tomorrow. Are you happy?
368
00:20:56,480 --> 00:20:57,639
Yes. Are you happy?
369
00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:59,839
Yes, I'm happy. I bet you were
brilliant. Yeah, OK, OK!
370
00:20:59,840 --> 00:21:02,279
I bet you blew their socks off.
Right, I've got to go, though.
371
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:04,239
OK. Keep me in the loop!
Yeah, I'm going to go now.
372
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,959
All right... Right, I'll speak to
you later. OK, OK, OK. Love you!
373
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,040
Love you too. Love you more.
Bye! Bye-bye.
374
00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,199
I know. She is such a bitch.
In your own time!
375
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:14,919
Why are we at a scabby house?
376
00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:16,919
Yeah, don't freak out, right, but...
377
00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:18,479
..Tony Chippy lives here.
378
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:19,719
What you doing? What the fuck?
379
00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:21,999
Yeah, well, he's not going to
get away with it. No, Beth,
380
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:24,439
just leave it. It doesn't matter.
It does matter, Lydia.
381
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:26,919
I swear... Seriously, no-one hurts
you and gets away with it.
382
00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:28,079
Just leave it!
383
00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:30,919
I swe... I'm leaving, then.
You're not. No... I'm leaving. Shh!
384
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:33,439
Wait... Trav, I don't want to.
No, you're not doing it.
385
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:35,079
You don't have to. No...
386
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:36,839
It doesn't change anything.
387
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,119
It does change everything.
388
00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:40,279
Beth, stop it!
389
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:42,160
No, I don't want to...
390
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:45,799
What?
391
00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:47,039
Are you Tony Chippy's wife?
392
00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:48,079
Who wants to know?
393
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:49,120
Me. Obviously.
394
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:52,919
I might be, yeah. And what?
395
00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:54,839
Well, you need to know something.
Spit it out.
396
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:57,719
I've got three minutes before this
starts burning into all of my scalp.
397
00:21:57,720 --> 00:21:58,880
He cheated on you.
398
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:01,359
What'd you say?
399
00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:03,559
Yeah. My friend, she's 16,
half his age.
400
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,239
You've got some big fucking clit,
turning up on my doorstep.
401
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:08,119
Yeah, well, it's true, so.
402
00:22:08,120 --> 00:22:09,559
Tony Chippy!
403
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:10,679
What?
404
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:11,920
Get here now!
405
00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:18,439
Well, come on, then, mouth.
406
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:19,479
Thinks you're brave?
407
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:20,559
Say it to his face.
408
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:22,999
What's all this?
You should be ashamed of yourself!
409
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,039
What they doing here?
410
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,679
I don't know, do I? Stupid
fucking kids.
411
00:22:25,680 --> 00:22:27,999
Well, if we're kids then
why d'you have sex with her? Huh?
412
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:29,479
Yeah, Tony.
413
00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:31,919
Chips, you best looks me
in the eye right now and tell me
414
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:33,559
they're lying, or I'm going to
fucking nut you.
415
00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:35,599
Shandy, man,
they're just little fucking shits!
416
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:37,799
Oh, you're a liar! You best run now,
before I belt you,
417
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,199
all three of you little fuckers!
418
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,519
Yeah, go on, threaten us
all you want, but you had sex
419
00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:43,679
with a 16-year-old
who was too drunk to consent.
420
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,839
What's she on about?
Do you know what, Tony?
421
00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,160
I wouldn't piss on you
if you were on fire.
422
00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:52,039
Fucking trollop!
423
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:55,359
Fucking ignore 'em, Shan, they're little
fucking slags trying to wreck my life!
424
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:58,279
That's fucking rich!
Shandy, check his car!
425
00:22:58,280 --> 00:23:00,639
My knickers are in there somewhere.
426
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:03,439
You little rotten, horrible bastard!
427
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,119
Oh, my God! Run!
428
00:23:05,120 --> 00:23:06,599
YELLING
429
00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:08,199
No hanky-panky, one vote only.
430
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:11,239
You going to vote for me?
That'd be telling, wouldn't it?
431
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:12,959
Come on, at least tell us
who's winning.
432
00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,399
All right, put it this way,
it's tighter than a nun's clam.
433
00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,719
Brilliant.
BETHAN CHUCKLES
434
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:18,199
Disgusting!
435
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:20,399
The ballot box has been emptied.
436
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:22,439
The votes have been counted.
437
00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:25,279
And I gathered you all here today
because we think it's high time
438
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:26,879
that we announced the winners.
439
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:31,640
Now, without further ado,
your deputy head girl...
440
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,760
Slight pause for suspense.
441
00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:39,759
..is Poppy Cruickshank.
442
00:23:39,760 --> 00:23:42,719
SHOCKED GASPS
443
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:44,559
That is shocking!
444
00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:47,439
I'm shocked, man!
445
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:49,359
F-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U...!
446
00:23:49,360 --> 00:23:50,599
MUTED
447
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:52,319
APPLAUSE
448
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:54,559
Congratulations, Poppy.
449
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:56,240
She's gutted!
450
00:23:57,440 --> 00:23:59,479
And now it gives me great pleasure
to reveal
451
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:03,599
Llanfair High School's
newly appointed head girl.
452
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,599
No, actually, no.
453
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:10,359
It's worth mentioning that this
is a huge responsibility.
454
00:24:10,360 --> 00:24:13,239
But I think these shoulders
will carry with the diligent...
455
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:14,600
Oh, come on!
456
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,040
It's Bethan Gwyndaf.
457
00:24:24,240 --> 00:24:26,999
Wh-aa-aa-aa!
458
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,360
CHEERING
459
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:43,599
That's cool! I know, I know!
I can't believe it!
460
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:45,400
EXCITED CHATTER
461
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:50,639
Babe, congrats!
Such a big achievement for you.
462
00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:52,039
How are you going to celebrate?
463
00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:53,719
Going to go for a Kashmiri
with my mam.
464
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:56,039
Nice. Yeah.
465
00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:58,759
Well, yeah, well done, you,
for getting deputy. Thanks.
466
00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:01,599
Actually worked out really well
because I'm so busy
467
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:04,159
with Duke of Edinburgh
and everything.
468
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:06,840
Two-faced was an interesting
comment, though.
469
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:10,040
Well done. Give me a hug.
470
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:16,480
Right. Catch you later.
471
00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:23,039
Said it before and I'll say it
again,
472
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:25,239
she's a CUNT!
473
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,999
She'll have to... You are head girl!
Head girl, bitch!
474
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,919
I'm head girl! Oh, my God!
You're very cool.
475
00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:33,079
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
It's amazing! You're, like...
476
00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:34,479
So you're literally...
477
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:38,120
MUSIC: Don't Leave Me This Way
478
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:45,319
Don't leave me this way
479
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,919
I can't survive
I can't stay alive
480
00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:50,839
Without your love...
481
00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:52,559
You all right, love?
482
00:25:52,560 --> 00:25:55,279
She likes the limelight, don't she?
BETHAN CHUCKLES
483
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:57,119
She won't let any of the others
have a go.
484
00:25:57,120 --> 00:25:59,240
Sorry. Nah, it's all right,
she's having fun.
485
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:02,440
Hm!
486
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:05,280
Oh, come here.
487
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,400
Eyelash.
488
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:15,520
Squash? Yeah.
489
00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:20,680
Enjoy.
490
00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:26,079
So can't you see
it's burning out of control?
491
00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:29,119
I think I'm going to need
some therapy
492
00:26:29,120 --> 00:26:32,760
Oh, babe
I hope you got a PhD...
493
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,279
Mum, sit down. Come on, love.
Mum, stop!
494
00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:41,479
Oh! Come and dance with me!
Mum, I don't want to.
495
00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:44,280
Stop it, Mum, stop it!
You're embarrassing yourself! Stop!
496
00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:51,720
Sorry.
497
00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:59,000
It'll be all right.
498
00:27:00,280 --> 00:27:02,399
Yeah.
499
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:04,959
Thank you so much!
That was brilliant!
500
00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:07,359
Thank you, that was great.
Thanks, Alfred.
501
00:27:07,360 --> 00:27:08,880
MUSIC STOPS
502
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:12,799
Mam?
503
00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:14,720
I got head girl today.
504
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:18,279
I know.
505
00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:19,920
You are my best girl.
506
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:24,999
She's never going
to understand me, is she?
507
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:26,840
UPBEAT MUSIC
508
00:27:39,720 --> 00:27:41,440
SHE SIGHS
509
00:27:49,080 --> 00:27:51,759
Having trouble telling how I feel
510
00:27:51,760 --> 00:27:56,679
But I can dance, dance, dance
511
00:27:56,680 --> 00:28:00,479
Couldn't possibly tell you
how I mean
512
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:03,599
But I can dance, dance, dance
513
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:05,999
So when I'm tripping my feet
514
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:11,559
Look at the beat
The words are written in the sand
515
00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:14,319
When I'm shaking my hips
516
00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:18,600
Look for the swing
The words are written in the air
517
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:22,879
Ooh, dance
518
00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:27,039
I was a dancer all along
519
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,440
Dance, dance, dance
520
00:28:30,880 --> 00:28:34,519
Words could never make up
for what you do
521
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:37,079
Dance, dance, dance...
522
00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:38,760
MUSIC FADES
523
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:43,640
SHE EXHALES
524
00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:47,119
Staff, these two are here
from the local comp,
525
00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:49,240
volunteering for their
Duke of Edinburgh awards.
526
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,800
BETHAN PANTS
527
00:28:55,850 --> 00:29:00,400
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