Original subtitles

f Yipee yi-o ki-a Galloping all the way

JS Here comes Quick Draw McGraw Sf

[announcer] Kellogg's, the best to you each morning,

from Kellogg's.

f~ Yipee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ Great big star on his chest f

£ Outdraws all of the rest f

~ Fastest gun in the west f

f Yipee yi-o ki-a Riding around your way J

JS Here comes Quick Draw McGraw Sf

f The high-falutin'est f

S Fastest shootin'est

~ Cowboy you ever saw f

J That's Quick Draw McGraw Sf

[announcer] Brought to you by Kellogg's...

[reading]

[theme music]

[narrator] This is the story of Little Cucaracha

the bandit who suddenly appeared with blazing guns...

[gunshots]

...to Strike terror throughout the West.

And has suddenly disappeared.

No one knows where or why.

It all began the day the stagecoach

headed out of Tuscan with a shipment of gold.

Driving the coach was the famous Quick Draw McGraw.

and riding shotgun

was his famous right-hand man, Baba Looey.

[gunshot]

I'm sorry, Queeks Straw, 1 didn't thin’ it was loaded.

[imitating Baba Looey] I'm sorry, Queeks Straw, 1 didn't think it was loaded.

Watch it, will you? That's the eighth time today.

[gunshots]

Hey, Queeks Straw,

it's Stagecoach Clooney, the robber.

Hold. Hold there, you coyotes.

Now is your chance, Baba. Blast him with your shotgun.

Okay, Queeks Straw, if you say so.

[gunshot]

What's the use?

Hey, Queeks Straw, what I do wrong?

Stop the chit-chat and throw down that strongbox.

I'm scared of bullets or ! would not do this.

[thud]

Hey, watch it.

[comical music]

I knocked Clooney loony with the strongbox, Baba

and the gold is saved.

1 feel funny in the head.

Gold. I thin’ l keep the gold for myself.

I'll do the thin'in' around here

and do-o-on't you forget it.

You are wrong, senor.

lam Little Cucaracha

the toughest bandito in the West.

l keep the gold.

Quit your nonsense, Baba.

You wouldn't dream of shootin’ your old buddy.

Ha ha ha. Would you?

No, senor, not when I can do it for real.

[gunshot]

Make way for Little Cucaracha. Yahoo! Yahoo!

Say, who's that tough little hombre?

Well, it used to be Baba Looey.

Now, he says he's Little Cucaracha-chacha

I thin’.

[gunshots]

He sure is tough.

Poor Baba.

Must have been the hit on the noggin what done it.

And so a new name was added

to the list of bad men

that of the dreaded

Little Cucaracha

who has openly boasted

that he will steal sack by sack

a shipment of gold guarded by his one time buddy,

Quick Draw McGraw.

Buddy or no buddy, he'll never get past me.

[screeching]

[Baba Looey] Yoo-hoo, it's me.

It's him, Baba Looey or Cucascracha or...

Uh, never mind, huh.

I'm comin’ in to get the gold sacks like I said.

Ya-ho-o-o!

! am warning you, ex-buddy.

l warned you.

[Baba Looey] Yoo-hoo!

Hey, Dizzy Deputy, I'm comin’ in for another sack.

Ya-ho-o-o!

Hmm. This Litthe Cucascracha's comin’ in mighty fast.

About a 100 miles an hour I'd say.

When he passes I! shall bash him with this rock.

Yeow!

Gad! That smarts.

Little Cucaracha strikes again, I thin’.

And next time he strikes

I'll be ready for him [ thin’

with this one ton weight.

Ya-ho-o-o!

And here comes the little critter now.

Ya-hoo! Ya-hoo!

That's gonna be your last yahoo, Cucu

uh, Cucarachuchuchu.

Bombs away!

Well, doggone. That darn thing's stuck.

Hey, senor, l hold this end of the rope

while you fix the one ton weight.

Gosh, heh. Much obliged, Cucarachi.

I'll have it fixed in a jiffy.

[metal clanking]

You thin’ it's fixed?

l thin' so, cookie boy.

That's all 1 want to know.

[thuds]

[muffled mumbling]

What's the matter, amigo? Your hat too big for you?

Ya-ho-o-o!

! will zero in on that little bandito

with a cannonball.

[explosion]

Cannonball on target.

Yahoo! Yahoo! Ya...

Ya--

[screeches]

Uh-oh, that cannonball made a U-turn.

What happened? My head feels funny.

Hey, Queeks Straw, where this gold come from?

Where am I?

Better yet, who am I?

l thin' may be 1 am a bird.

Hey, Queeks Straw, what's the matter?

! am a bird and I thin' ! will fly South for the winter.

Queeks Straw, no. Queeks Straw, come back.

One side, ducks.

I'm headin’ South.

Hey, Queeks Straw.

l thin' thees Queeks Straw is for the birds.

But I like him.

Come back, little Queeks Straw. Come Back!

[theme music]

[telephone ringing]

Snooper Detective Agency,

where the indiscreet meet defeat.

Yes, madam?

Your pet globobian monkey escaped?

Gosh, Snoop! A real globobian monkey?

You think he's hiding in a super market?

Five thousand if l catch him?

Hey, for that kind of money

I'll be glad to be a monkey's uncle!

What's the caper, Snoop?

There's monkey business afoot, Blab. It's a 906.

A 906, wowee, a 906, really, Snoop?

Golly, wow, wow! Diggity dag diggity wowee, wow!

Quiet.

Now tell me, assistant, what's a 906?

How do ! know, Snoop?

I'm only your assistant.

I'd replace this assistant, but he comes cheap.

Well, here we are, at the monkey's hideout.

Remember, don't let it be known a monkey's on the loose,

or some ulterior person might move in on the reward.

Right, Snoop.

Now, you browse around

in the vegetable department,

whilst I mingle

with the bandages and cold cuts.

Gosh, what a brain.

Someday I'll be a private eye hero, just like Snoop.

Are you looking for something, sonny?

Yes, but it's confidential.

Well, you can tell me.

I'm the manager.

Okay. Where do you keep your loose monkeys?

Monkeys?

Under M, of course, funny guy.

Everybody's a comic.

Under M!

Why didn't I think of that?

M, here's we are.

Mushrooms, mustard, m-m-monkey!

Gosh, it's the culprit.

This is my big chance.

All right monkey, what's your name?

Where were you last night?

How did you break out?

Oh, I get it, see no evil,

hear no evil, speak no evil.

Clamming up, huh?

Okay, let's go.

I'm taking you back in a paper sack,

then no one will get suspicious.

Snoop will be so proud of me.

It's the little smart alec.

Did you find your monkey?

Sure, it was right where you said.

Of course.

May I peek?

Are you in there, you little rascal.

He's a cute little culprit.

He-he-he-he-he.

! wonder if head shrinker is under S.

! need one.

Hey, Snoop! Snoop, where are you?

l found the pet globobian monkey

you told me to keep quiet about.

I'm glad you're doing such a loud job of it.

Now, where's the simian monkey?

He's in the sack, Snoop.

What sack, my addled assistant? Uh-oh!

The paper sack, with the monkey legs.

What else?

Folly that paper sack!

Right, Snoop, wait till ! warm up my motor!

Vroom! Vroom! Vroom!

Heh-heh, that Blab is like a kid sometimes.

Vroom! Vroom! Vroom!

Halt in the name of the private eye lacrosse team!

[screeching]

Are you okay, Snoop?

Oh, sure, just step up and call me watermelon head.

In order to be a private eye, a good sense of humor,

like Snoop's, is essential.

Ain't that cute, Snoop?

He's soap skating.

So what, two can play that game.

! wasn't skating champ of Private Eye Prep for nothin’.

I'll take the polish off his monkey shines.

Now I'll dazzle him with a burst of speed.

How am! doing, Blab?

Gosh! What form, Snoop!

Say, Snoop, ! didn't know it was time for lunch.

I'll think of a smart answer later.

Mean whilst, folly that monkey!

Hey, Snoop, ! got him cornered on top of the cash register.

What's with the hammer, Snoop?

You heard the expression "Monkey see's, monkey does?"

-Yes. -Well, observe whilst I use it

to nail that midget baboon.

[blowing raspberries]

Bop-a bop-a bop-a bop-a.

Here pal, you try it.

No, you numbskull, like this!

Whammo! Hard! Get it?

[comical music]

Now remember, Wellington, stand here, and don't move.

Yes, my love.

1 must look at the kumquats.

Yes, my love.

Wellington! How dare you move!

Come back here!

Woo! Are you ever going to get it!

Wait till 1 get you home!

Alleviate your anguished fears,

and we captured your monkey,

and we're coming over to capture the reward.

Let's go, fella!

Gosh, ! sure feel sorry for that monkey.

[theme music]

Happy birthday, my one-year-older son!

Thanks, Dad of Dads!

Make a wish, Augie!

And if you blow out the candles,

your wish will come true.

For sure, Dad?

Would your old Dad fib to you on your birthday?

So, make a wish!

Okay, Dad. ! wish, um...

[muttering]

You did it, Augie!

And here's the skates you wished for.

! didn't wish for skates, generous Dad.

Well then, here's the scout bugle you wished for.

It's nice, Dad.

But that's not it, either.

My wish should be flying in that window

any minute now.

Of course, of course.

It was the super jet model

you had on your mind all the time.

If you'll just be quiet,

we may hear him comin’ any second.

-Who, for pete's sake? -Who?

Why, none other than Captain Zoom Zoom!

Fweep-fweep-fweep fweep-weep!

Augie, Augie, my boy,

you didn't wish for that interplantarian joker.

Yes, Dad.

! wished for him

to be my birthday guest of honor.

But, Augie, my son, maybe...

Maybe Captain Zoom Zoom can't make it.

Dad, you were fibbin’.

! don't get my wish.

Oh, the birthday shame of it!

Any right-thinkin'’ father could see.

This could affect his son for the rest of his life.

-Augie. -You called?

Go back on his word, Dad?

Augie, my son, nobody said Captain Zoom Zoom wasn't comin’.

Oh, you mean he'll be here after all?

Not only that, son.

But you wait at that window,

and I'll go out and flag him down.

Fweep-wheep.

Fweep-weep-weep.

Where to get a Captain Zoom Zoom?

That is the question.

Ah! The TV station.

Where else?

Captain Zoom Zoom won't turn down little Augie,

his biggest fan.

-[Knocking] -Come in.

-Captain Zoom Zoom, I presume. -Yes, what is it?

My autograph or just some plain hero worshiping?

Speak up, l have a splitting headache.

Your, uh, majesty.

My little boy Augie wishes for you

to be the guest of honor on his birthday.

Are you kiddin'?

With my splitting headache

and my dizzy spells?

Out, out, out!

Out at once!

Oh, my splitting headache.

How can I ever face my boy?

Huh? That's how!

Rent a Captain Zoom Zoom costume!

How coincidentally can you get? [laughs]

What a birthday.

First, no Captain Zoom Zoom.

Now, no Dad.

Fweep! Fweep-wheep-wheep-wheep!

Make way for Captain Zoom Zoom!

Welcome to earth, captain!

I knew you'd come, Captain Zoom Zoom.

I'm down here, boy.

I knew you'd come, Captain Zoom Zoom.

And an interplanetarian happy birthday to you, son!

Dad, hey, Dad. He's here, Dad. He's here!

Think fast, Captain Zoom Zoom.

Think fast.

Hello, Captain Zoom Zoom.

You old son of a sea Cook.

Hello, Doggie Daddy!

You old pirate, you.

Captain Zoom Zoom?

Yes, my son, my...

! mean, Augie?

Is it true you can go through a brick wall

without a scratch?

Under certain favorable circumstances.

Do it, then, do it, do it. Will you do it, huh?

-Huh, do it, do it, do it? -Oh, boy.

You can go through the side of the house.

It's brick.

One side, Augie.

Captain Zoom Zoom, ready for blast-off!

I'll stop short of the house

and tell him it wouldn't be right to wreck it.

Fweep-fweep. Fweep-fweep-fweep.

Hey!

Wowee, look at him go.

Wowee, he did it!

Fweep-wheep-wheep wheep-wheep!

Stop the motor, somebody, stop the motor!

Anybody for tea?

[comical music]

Have you read any good books lately?

Captain Zoom Zoom, you are the greatest.

That's oblivious, son.

And now, my little friend, it's time for me to head

for the outer spaces.

Be good, and many happy returns of the day.

[man of radio] Attention. Attention, all citizens.

Be on the lookout for an escaped gorilla.

He is dangerous.

Oh, you better get inside, son. Quick.

I might have to tangle with this gorilla,

and there might be bloodshed.

Mine, that is.

You're not afraid of a gorilla.

Afraid? Me?

Ho-ho-ho!

Why I'll pick him up

on my way to the outer spaces.

How will you capture him?

Very simply.

When I spot him, l reaches over

and grabs him by his hairy arm.

And gives a twist.

Like so.

Ooh!

Isn't he keen?

Then I lets him know who's the master.

1 look him straight in the eye.

What a revoltin' development this is.

Go, go, go, Captain Zoom Zoom.

Boy, is that gorilla gonna get it.

! gotta lure this gorilla away from my boy Augie.

After all, it's the least Captain Zoom Zoom can do.

Meanwhile, I think I'll go underground.

Home at last.

What a day.

Augie? Augie boy?

-I'm back. -Shh! Quiet, Dad.

My friend and I are watching Captain Zoom Zoom.

Fweep-wheep-wheep wheep-wheep!

Fweep-wheep-wheep wheep-wheep-wheep!

Okay, boys, move over, move over.

Captain Zoom Zoom has just got himself a new fan.

Fweep-wheep. Fweep-fweep-fweep fweep-fweep.

f Yipee yi-o ki-a Galloping all the way

~ There goes Quick Draw McGraw f

[announcer] Kellogg's, your best choice in cereals...

[reading]

f~ Yipee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ Great big star on his chest f

£ Outdraws all of the rest f

~ Fastest gun in the west f

f Yipee yi-o ki-a Galloping all the way

~ There goes Quick Draw McGraw f

f The high-falutin'est f

S Fastest shootin'est

~ Cowboy you ever saw f

Hey, Baba Looey! Are you all right?

S'awright.