Original subtitles

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PRISON

- Do you have an umbrella? - Come on!

It's raining. How rude!

Adelina! I knew you would come!

I've been thinking about this since yesterday.

I kept saying to myself…

"I bet I'll find her by the door."

It's raining!

You have an umbrella and I don't…

I don't want to go straight from jail to hospital.

Adelina, wait.

How long will this go on?

How is your mother doing? Don't tell me, I'm sure she's fine.

- She doesn't want you! - Mind your own business, idiot!

Adelina!

Alfredo, you talked a lot

but you didn't say the one thing you had to.

- That you're surprised to see me. - Why would I? You're my wife.

I'm here to tell you one thing,

that I didn't cheat on you with the mechanic.

I didn't cheat on you.

Are you still talking about that? I don't even think about it anymore.

I don't even remember his face.

With his stupid moustache. Look here.

I made you a gift, look.

Do you like it? Nice, isn't it?

I couldn't sleep without you.

I spent two years sleeping on this pillow.

Let me come closer, so you can look at it.

Are you crazy?

Crazy my ass!

I've always loved you. This took three years of needlework.

And I had to fight with everyone to prove that I wasn't queer.

They always saw me sewing…

I just gave you a couple of slaps and you had me spend five years in jail.

And you never even visited!

I spent 40 days at the hospital for those few slaps!

You call those a few slaps? I was bed-bound!

The surgeon asked me if I got hit by a tank.

- Come on… - Look at the scars!

- Refresh your memory. - You fell down the stairs.

Remember this? Was it my fault, and I lost balance?

- You're so beautiful! - I don't belong to you anymore.

I told you all I had to say.

No, I forgot the most important thing, the one I came for.

I don't want to see you, you don't have to look for me.

We don't know each other anymore.

Sure, Adelina. If I see you, I'll introduce myself.

What the… Adelina, wait!

Wait a second!

Here you go.

Sit down, Mum. Aren't you happy to see me?

Of course I am happy to see you.

But if they kept you in a couple of months longer

I'd feel happier.

- I knew that you'd eat every day. - And went to bed early at night.

That someone would take care of you.

Now that your wife left you, who will take care of you?

Don't worry, I'll find another one. Let's drink to that.

Elvira.

Alfredo, I wanted to tell you something.

- I don't know where to start. - Just tell me.

I wanted to write to you…

Then I decided I would tell you once I'd see you in person.

- It has been three years. - Mmh.

- I was feeling so lonely… - And so?

You see… I met a man.

Why are you so sad in telling me?

- Are you pregnant? - Don't say stupid things!

- I don't think about such things anymore! - Well, that Omero looks fine.

- How did you know it was him? - I'm not stupid.

Elvira, champagne.

Mazzola! Good boy.

Let me look at you!

You're a big boy!

Do you still remember me, after five years?

- Did your mum tell you? - Of course.

- I won't call you "dad". - Of course! Let's have a toast.

What a day! My wife dumps me, my mum gets engaged.

At least I have my dog!

If you want to come work with us…

You'd welcome me with open arms, I know…

but I'm not cut out for working.

Work kills our imagination.

What do you say, Omero?

Let's go, Mazzola.

Bye, Mum.

These are your house keys.

Thank you. Bye.

So handsome.

Mazzola! Come with me, I'll have you live a good life.

Here he eats every day, with you…

Isn't a dog supposed to be a man's best friend? Fucking pussycat!

- Alfredo! Welcome back! - Thank you!

- It was about time! - Thank you.

- Alfredo! - The sun is back, lady!

- Menghini is back! - Hello everybody!

Who told you that I was back? The prison or the TV?

I'm coming up.

- Mrs. Maria! - Alfredo! You look so gaunt!

I was in prison, not on vacation.

Did you see my husband? He was in the violent section.

What do you think, I'm not coming from Dante's Inferno!

- You're still so handsome. - Thank you.

- Would you like a cup of coffee? - Of course I do.

I have a gift for you. This brings good luck and prosperity.

It belongs to my family, now I'll give it to you.

Horns bring me bad luck. Thank you for the kind thought.

Thank you for the warm welcome.

What a fool! Since when are horns bad luck?

She took everything.

Aside from the walls and…

Adelina…

this house is so empty without you.

What the…

Even the toilet seat!

Liliana, you crazy cow!

Alfredo! You finally got out of prison!

- Indeed. How is it going? - Six months in, six months out.

When you're unlucky even the dogs piss on you!

Last time I tried to mug a drunk guy

and he was a police officer!

You really are unlucky!

- I thought about you a lot. - Me too, when I was inside.

I kept thinking about you, wondering whether you put weight on.

- But you're even hotter than before. - You must have argued with your wife!

I know you, rascal!

Liliana, would you have a mattress?

Otherwise I'll sleep on the floor.

- An empty bed is sad. - Get inside it and it won't be empty.

Are you giving me just the mattress?

Give me all that is needed with it.

Liliana… will you sleep with me?

Try to understand my situation. It has been five years…

It will be better than Arabian Nights!

Damn it!

Who would have thought that after five years you couldn't get it up?

I even brought you another mattress!

"I'll will be better than Arabian Nights!"

I wasn't expecting all the positions in the book, but at least one!

It's this mattress' fault! It's like a dog house.

- We could have done it doggy style! - It's her fault.

I come home from jail and I find my house empty.

- It was a shock. - This is a shock as well!

I wouldn't take her back, not even if she'd came back begging.

- Look at her, what a coward! - She was cute though.

She isn't cute.

If I look properly, she's really ugly.

At last! But I must say that I don't feel flattered…

Look what I have to do to help you get a hard on!

We are having a threesome.

Be my boyfriend, you darn rascal. I do love you.

- Shut up. - We'll take the child as well.

What now?

There's no chance of making love tonight!

Son of a bitch!

I had completely forgotten that I have a child.

Have you not decided yet?

Do you know what Professor Pestolazzi used to say?

When a father buys a gift without thinking enough about it,

- he's a piece of shit. - Take your time, then!

Thank you.

I'm sorry, I can't choose. I'll come back with my son.

All right.

Miss, do you know Pasqualino Menghini?

No, I don't think so. Are you sure he comes to nursery here?

- Five years ago he did. - Now he'll be in primary school.

Over there.

You're right! What an idiot!

It's a sacrifice for me,

but I could sell it to you for 20,000 lira. It's a bargain.

Are you crazy? 20,000?

Don't be naive! It's the ball of AC Milan's victory!

- Rivera gave it to me. - Come on, you're lying!

It's his autograph!

- What are you talking about? - Pasqualino!

- Look who is here. - Who are you?

What do you mean?

I'm your daddy.

- Here. Do you like it? - Where is the remote control?

Without that it's worthless. It's for little kids.

- You were scammed. - Strange, I got it in Paris.

- While I lived in Paris… - Do you think that I'm stupid?

- Are you good at math? - Very good.

- I have an "ingfuck" problem. - What does it mean?

- "Fucking" is vulgar! - What about that problem?

- Tell me. - A shepherd had 386 sheep.

He sold 3/4 of them to Antonio.

He split the rest in seven equal parts. How many did he sell to Antonio?

3 quarters… 7 quarters… It's 76.

- You're great! - Thank you, but I already know it.

Tell mummy.

She's playing hard to get, she doesn't want to live with me anymore.

- I know, Dad. - Dad! See? It came naturally.

Tell her, "Today I saw my dad again.

He's so nice, he got me a gift!

He loves me and you too!

We could be happy if we get back together!"

- Tell her. - There's the problem of Giovanni.

- Who is he? - I thought you knew about him.

Mum is with him now. He's a taxi driver.

- It can't be. I don't believe you. - Yes.

- Where do you live? - That building there. Second floor.

You wait downstairs.

Adelina, open!

I know that you're there!

Careful… Damn!

Adelina!

- Who are you? What do you want? - I'm looking for Adelina.

Adelina's is across the hall.

I got the wrong flat.

Damn you! Check your information before tearing doors down!

Adelina, open! I know that you're home!

- Adelina! - Are you looking for me?

Here I am! Did you want to tell me something?

Coward! I know the truth now.

I'll kill that Giovanni! I'd be happy to do another 10 years.

- For real? - Yes!

Even if you're not worth it.

Good job. You still have good aim.

Alright, that's enough. Listen to me.

Smile, I came to take you back.

Adelina, laugh!

Yes, you make me laugh!

Why are you doing this? I always loved you.

Are you forgetting about all the suffering?

The exhaustion, you never having a job.

And what about Pasqualino? "What will he eat today? And tomorrow?"

- And you were always broke. - Did you marry me for money?

A beggar like you? Remember August 1972?

Oh my God! What happened?

You wanted to cook and said, "We won't die of starvation!"

- And you didn't, did you? - You gave us crickets!

Poor Pasqualino threw up all night!

You eat snails and frogs, don't you? Why not crickets!

Now I'm in love with Giovanni. He is a real man!

Adelina…

- You were happy with me, once. - Alfredo, go away.

- How can… - Careful, they're sharp.

- Alright, but I want Pasqualino. - What for?

Did you give birth to him? Did you raise him, or feed him?

Did you take him to school? He is my son.

- He stays with me. - You took all my stuff.

The bedroom, the furniture. Now you take my son too!

- You even took the toilet seat. - Your stuff? Do you want your stuff?

Come pick it up.

Here.

Take it!

The chair.

- Take it. - That is mine too.

You're right. Vase and column.

Go take your stuff!

Mum is really upset!

This is yours as well. Here, take it.

Do you have an umbrella holder to spare?

No, that's mine.

I bought that dress.

It's true. You're right.

Alfredo, get this thought in your head.

There's nothing you can do.

And now go.

Nothing, second time in a row… No Arabian Nights!

Have a little patience. Next time, I'll be great.

- Answer the door. - Yes.

Come in.

You're late.

Alfredo, I do have one question.

It's becoming a duty for me. Must I make you coffee every morning?

Please, don't be so formal with me.

Yes, but tell me why do I have to bring you coffee every morning?

- Don't you drink one every morning? - Of course, or I don't wake up.

Why shouldn't I drink one too? Actually, I need another one.

I have a guest.

Two coffees, now?

I clearly opened a coffee shop!

- You drink it. Look what you make me do. - Thanks.

- Red horn, help me out. - I'm feeling great today.

Liliana, I'm turning a new leaf. I've decided to change my life.

- What a relief! - I'm happy for you.

Since you're turning a new leaf, can we stop with the threesomes?

- What? - With her.

Yes, you're right.

I'm gonna take you apart, I'm gonna erase you.

Everything has to change.

I want to make a palace out of this house. We need a bed,

- furniture and the toilet seat. - One must shit comfortably!

I tear your eyes out.

As I created you, I destroy you!

Salomone!

I fell on my ass! Did you see?

And yet you don't believe in bad luck, you Northeners!

I wasn't wearing my horn.

And I fell.

Be careful with that!

Come up.

Hurry up, please.

- What should I take, Miss? - The table or the bed.

I'll take the bed.

- I'll take this too, since I'm here. - Yes, well done.

Look, someone else must be moving.

Thank you. Porter!

Come, dear. Porter!

Milan is supposed to be efficient! Where's a porter?

Here I am.

- At long last, it was about time. - Where to, sir?

- Rome. - See you at platform number 7.

- All right. - No, give it to me.

Are you happy? See, what a bed! I always keep my promises.

Speaking about promises… With all these things that we got,

this beautiful whore nightgown,

can you finally get it up and get busy with me, after so long?

- No? - Yes, actually.

I feel that this might be the right evening.

You're right, it's this luxurious atmosphere or the sexy nightgown…

Maybe you're even more beautiful than usual.

My beautiful Liliana!

Despite all these things, you can't get a hard on.

But why, damn it? Can't you just focus?

I'm sorry, Liliana. I don't understand.

Try taking a deep breath.

Is it better?

Is it getting any better? No, huh?

I'll go get a coffee.

Make it a double.

- Hello? - Hi, Pasqualino. It's Dad.

- Don't tell Mum it's me. - Alright, Lucentini.

- Who is it? - A classmate of mine.

Listen up, Pasqualino, I wanted to ask you…

Tell me, how is this Giovanni?

- Why is he better than me? - He's big.

- Who is big? - It's a big problem!

A shepherd had 285 sheep…

What is it with your and sheep? Is your teacher from the countryside?

- You won't trick me again. - He gave you the wrong number again?

I don't have time to waste. It's a bad situation here.

- What do you want? - You're right. What do I want?

I don't know.

How can I explain it to you? You're a child, Pasqualino.

I want to know what are you doing.

I want to know if your mum is happy and content.

If she is sad or tired.

- What questions are these? - Now she is laughing. She's fine.

- They are watching TV. - Come here with us.

I'm coming.

Wait, don't go. It's fun.

- What? - Well… hearing her voice.

She doesn't know that I'm listening.

I have an idea, a fun game.

Now you say goodbye and hang up the phone the wrong way,

do you understand?

- So I can hear what you say. - Alright. Bye Lucentino.

- Are you ready to order? - A pizza with anchovies.

All right. A pizza with anchovies.

With…

lots of anchovies.

Are we going to sleep?

It's early. And I have to finish that problem.

I will do the dishes, or tomorrow…

- Mum, listen… - Tell me.

Are you happier now or were you happier before?

- What a question is this? - Tell me about when you were young.

I'm not old either!

While Mum cleans up, let's solve this problem together.

Go get your notebook.

Tell me, Adelina.

Were you happier before or now?

What a silly question! It's impossible to compare.

I'm fine now.

I'm content.

What's happiness anyway?

I'm happy. And content.

And I care for you, you know that.

I want to have my picture taken.

- Poster format. - Come in.

Wait. I think profile is better.

It makes my traits softer.

What do you think?

No. Better this side?

What do you think?

- How long do I have to wait? - Three minutes.

Thank you.

- Luisa! It has been a long time! - We don't know each other.

- What a pleasure! - My name isn't Luisa.

- So sorry, I've mistaken you for a friend. - It doesn't matter.

- I'm really sorry. - You don't know him?

No.

Here is your poster.

I'm so handsome.

- Do you deliver? - Yes.

I'm leaving, please send it to this address. Write it down.

Pasqualino Menghini.

I'm leaving soon, you see.

Via Pasubio 4.

Are you suffering? No?

Do you mind?

I want to write something. It's for my son.

"Bye…

Dad." Yes.

- 40,000 lira. - Here we go.

- 40,000? - 40,000.

- I have 39,000 lira. - It's fine.

Pasqualino! I've been waiting for half an hour.

- Hi. - Hi.

Do you come before the janitor?

Funny! Did you get my picture?

- No, what picture? - The poster.

I see… I knew it.

Let's skip school today.

Let's go have some fun.

I need to talk to you, to spend some time with you.

I can't, they'll give us report cards and I have an assignment to do.

It's so difficult. I need to write an essay on how I imagine Africa.

The teacher is crazy, what do I know about it?

You're right.

Dad, are you really taking me to Africa?

Yes, so you'll write the best essay of your whole life!

We must tell Mum, how long will we be gone? A month?

What? We will be back just in time for the end of school.

- Really? - Of course.

- Is this Carthago? - I know, it's a little run down.

I had pictured it differently.

Your Mum will be so surprised.

- Shall I address it to Giovanni too? - No!

- Do you think that she loves him? - I think so, Dad.

He isn't like you. He is a serious guy, he saves money.

So basically we have everything. TV, dishwasher, everything…

What does it mean? There are more important things in life.

A Dishwasher TV… I don't like this way of thinking.

It will be her birthday soon.

- I know what she wants. - What?

A nice fur coat. But Giovanni can't afford it now.

- He says we're in recession. - It's good for something. Let's go.

Pasqualino!

- How was school? - Very well.

Really? Well done.

Miss Adelina, there's mail for you.

Laugh, Adelina. I don't want you to be unhappy.

I made a big decision.

I will come back to you

and take you away from your drab life, to a world of dreams.

I'll bring you so many gifts

to put the Three Kings to shame.

Smile…

- I told you to smile. - Go away.

Go away!

Let's go, before I do something silly.

- Was that Dad's idea? - Yes.

He's so cool! He writes so well.

- Do you hate Dad? - Why? Don't you like Giovanni?

Sure Giovanni is a good man,

but he'd never have the idea of the guys with the signs.

I believe what Dad says.

- You'll see. He can do anything. - Exactly!

In order to buy a fur coat for your wife

we need to steal the statue of the Virgin Mary on the Duomo?

I don't want just the fur coat, I want a lot more.

We will be rich!

Something like this is priceless, it's worth millions of dollars.

It'd be the hit of the century.

"The Milan Virgin Mary sold at the New York's auction."

I can see the newspapers. "Who are the thieves of the Holy Virgin?"

Here they are!

- Are you crazy? - We just need a good plan.

It will take a couple of nights, but… I'm a believer.

Listen. "The Virgin of Milan, built in 1774…"

"It's sometimes taken down to clean it." See, they take it down.

"It's almost 4 meters tall." I thought more!

"And almost 2 meters wide." I thought more.

- "It weights 400 kg." - I thought less.

- How can we… - I'll take care of it. Wait here.

Do you mind? I'll take a nice photo of you.

The whole family. You too, little girl. Look that way.

The statue in the background. Now look that way.

Come here!

And so?

So… It's too difficult, we've got to give up.

I'm sorry for the Virgin, but we must pick another statue.

- Which one? - Whichever. Look.

Do you think these are worth any less?

Artistic stuff, 700 years old.

Look. And much easier to steal.

- Where is your toolbox? - Ready. Here.

Uncle Michele gave it to me. He was a thief.

This crowbar belonged to my grandpa, then to my father

and then to me. We used it to escape from prison,

but now we don't need it anymore because no one goes to jail anymore.

- I meant to ask you something. - What?

Do you have anything that didn't belong to someone else?

- Careful. Don't drop it. - I will not.

- Be careful, don't squash me. - I'm being careful.

Here we go.

Come on, Salomone.

Careful. Do you understand?

- Don't worry. I'll hold the rope. - That's why I worry. Hold it!

Be quiet!

When will I get down? This is a skyscraper! Slowly!

Jesus, how long?

Finally!

I wonder why statues always have a nice ass.

What are you doing?

- Is it there? - I think so.

What are you doing? You were supposed to untie yourself.

- Idiot! - Don't get mad! I'm the one in mid air!

Hello my friend. Where's the stuff?

Here. It's good stuff. It's worth millions.

In cash.

Nice. Very nice.

Congratulations!

- How much? - Fuck all.

- What do you mean? - It means nothing, zilch, nada.

- Do you want me to translate it? - This was on the Duomo.

And it should be there still. Cover them back up.

Use your brain.

If you tear down the Duomo,

who can I sell the statues to, the Virgin Mary statue?

These statues are valuable because they are on top of the Duomo.

If you take them away from there, no one will want them. Give me that.

- You're in the newspaper. - It's a big heist.

That's too risky.

- It was a lot of work. - Don't pout like that.

Don't get yourself down.

You just have to pick the right items. Something a little less visible.

Bring them here to Carlina

and I will give you money right away. Come on.

Get a rug for yourself.

Let me show you that I want to do business with you.

- Pick one. - What would I do with it?

Careful!

Careful with that hat!

Go on.

Why are you pushing me?

Ticket, please.

Thank you.

Hey, stop!

Give me the rug back!

That's mine.

Laugh away…

- Mind where you're going. - After you, Miss.

Do you mind if I rest it here? I can't hold it anymore.

- Can I have a piss on my own? - I'll keep you company.

- Have you never pissed with a rug? - No.

I've been carrying it for 30 minutes. I was about to piss myself.

Happy birthday, my love.

I wanted to buy you a fur coat but then I said to myself,

"Only the nouveau rich wear fur coats"

Give her a nice gift and get her a rug." Where do you want it?

It will keep your feet warm.

- Are you crazy? - You're never happy!

I see, you have one already. But mine is nicer.

This house has everything. Ornaments, doilies…

What a nice place. You settled down, haven't you?

Good job.

I'm glad.

Where do you want it?

Stick that rug up where the sun don't shine.

That cabdriver made you vulgar. What have you become?

What do we have here? What a nice big bed!

Who sleeps here?

Alfredo, get lost!

Don't get mad, I was just curious.

Where should I put it? Hurry up, it's heavy.

Dear Adelina…

if one day we really had to split up

we'd have to do it the civilised way.

We must stay friends.

I'm calm now. I'm relaxed.

You know…

I love you like a sister.

I can't take it!

- You can't sleep with him! I'll kill him! - Let go of me!

Hello.

Giovanni, let me introduce you to my cousin… Connaghi.

- Alfronso. - You mean "Alfonso"?

No, it is Alfronso. My parents couldn't decide

between Alfredo and Alfonso, so they called me Alfronso.

- How original. It's a pleasure. - Likewise.

Goodbye, Alfronso. It was nice to see you.

Come on, Adelina. What's the rush?

Happy birthday to you.

Thank you.

- Will you stay for dinner? - No, he has a date. He can't stay.

- Of course, I'd love to. - Well done. Good.

- I'll go wash my hands. - What a soft touch!

Now come up with an excuse and leave.

Today is your birthday and I won't leave you alone with him.

Are you crazy living with that guy? Have you seen his face? Oh my!

He's a lowlife! He's ambiguous, sneaky and morally retarded.

Come with me.

- What do you want from me? - Adelina, look…

What's wrong, sexy? Are you nervous?

- You're so affectionate. - She deserves it.

- Go on, sexy, bring us some wine. - Sure.

- Your cheek is all red. - It's nothing, just the heat.

My circulation…

What a girl she is!

From a man to another, I know she is your cousin,

but she's such a whore!

I like whores, don't you?

What? Yes, of course.

Is she a whore?

You bet.

Do you know that bastard of her husband?

He used to beat her, you know? You should see her scars.

- I saw them. - What do you mean?

- Well, I… - No! He didn't see them.

I told him about them.

He did wrong but I'm sure that he loved her.

In his own way.

A shitty way…

If I ever meet him, I'll break him like this.

Sorry, you've got nothing to do with him.

If you see him, Alfronso…

tell him about that. Understand?

Now it's late. We don't want to keep you.

We'll go have a rest.

Enough coffee, you drank 18 of those!

- 17. - Bad luck.

It can't be any worse.

There's a way to stop them from making love.

Try, it's free. Here it is, look.

Let me show you something. This is powerful.

This would shrink the trunk of an elephant. Look.

Salomone… fuck off.

- Do you want to make him sterile? - No, just impotent.

A look at it will be enough. How will we pay the cab?

- Do you have money? - Me?

- What can we do? - Use the fake 10,000 note.

Are you mad? It's dangerous, a blind man would see that it's fake.

- Come on. - Only my grandpa paid with this.

My father got five years for it. If I can find the 500,000 note, maybe…

- Here it is. - Come on.

Fancy a cigarette?

Do you want a light?

Red horn be on the watch, make him rot on the crotch.

- Would you like a candy? - No, thank you.

The cigarette is enough.

I knew that you were gay as soon as you stepped into my cab.

I don't know why people don't like you. I think you're funny.

I saw it right away, you play for both teams. No offence.

And you know how? I could see it in your face.

You have the face of a faggot!

I lost my binoculars. Damn…

- Who's there? - Good evening.

A fallen angel. Did your break your wings, sweetie?

Nice to meet you, I'm Alfredo Menghini.

I was passing by…

What are you doing there? Come in.

I'm not sure…

Aren't you afraid? I could be a thief.

No, I can spot bad people.

You've a good man's face. I'm Rosa Balestra.

Enchanté.

Come in.

Thank you.

- Do you like it? - Yes.

It's my room. As a girl.

I live here out of dreams and memories.

- I used to play the piano. - Impressive.

This is me when… I was young.

And that too.

- I have nothing to offer you. - It doesn't matter.

My children say I spend too much. What were you doing there?

I was spying on a girl who lives there.

I see.

You're Romeo

and Juliet lives on the other side of the street.

Right.

Wait.

Use this.

It's just what I needed.

Whore!

Have fun, you'll see what a surprise is waiting for you.

That's huge!

Salomone!

When will the red horn work its magic?

What's going on?

My wife is there together with a humongous…

Things are though, everyone has their problems.

What are you doing in my house? Are you hurt?

I'm full of pain.

Where were you? I've been waiting all night.

I was earning a living. Not a bad night. We'll eat for a few days.

Look how many wallets I took.

I don't care.

Give me the earrings that I gave you. I need them.

- Why? - Because.

I'll buy you a new pair. Bye.

- How long will it take? - I'll be back soon.

Adelina!

Guess who called the police on you? I did!

You're a thief! Now you can't make love with him anymore.

Hug your pillow and sleep.

- Sleep tight. - Son of a bitch!

- Adelina. - Alfredo.

I was released just now, that woman dropped the charges.

She said she lost those earrings.

But while I was inside I understood how much you love me.

You were a bastard in doing that, but you opened my eyes.

Adelina, I… Try to understand me.

Forgive me, I did that…

I know why you did it.

- And I have to thank you. - You do?

Who knows how long would this last?

- Adelina… - My love…

I can't believe it. You don't know how much I suffered.

Hold me tight…

What the fuck are you doing?

1,000 slaps for each day I spent there.

Four days, 4,000 slaps. and I have just started!

Rascal! Lowlife! Murderer! Scoundrel! Cheat!

- Damned wretched soul! - Stop it.

You'll remember this all your life. Coward! Heartless!

Adelina!

You hurt me, and now you're hurt too.

Adelina! Go away! Enough! Calm down.

- I will kill you. Die! - Look, Adelina…

Adelina!

I will kick you…

Adelina!

Take care.

She beat me up.

She thinks she can fix everything by beating me up.

She's so naive. And what do I do if she beats me?

I bring her a gift.

She hits me and I turn the other cheek.

I don't send flowers or chocolates. I have some imagination.

Come here.

Pasqualino will like you.

- Is this a joke? - I told you it isn't.

- When did you go to Africa? - Don't pull that face.

I went with Dad. We went and came back in a day.

- To Africa? - From morning to evening.

- Just in time for the end of school. - Right.

- Hi Pasqualino. How are you? - Hi! Fine.

Is everything cool? Look there.

- I brought you a gift. - Is it a trained monkey?

I hope your Mum will like it too. Let's introduce you.

This is Pasqualino.

And that's his Mum. Don't be scared.

It is a pure breed. It's King Kong's nephew. Twice removed.

- You can call it King King. - King King!

It is only 10 days old.

But it will grow.

In three months' time it will be as big as its grandpa.

- Take it away, now. - I knew it.

Strange, I thought you had a soft spot for big monkeys.

You can pet it. Don't be afraid.

It doesn't bite or slap.

Hi, Alfronso.

Go to your room. Dad and Giovanni must talk.

- What should we talk about? - Give him pen and paper.

Sit down and write.

First: I won't bother them anymore.

Write it.

Write!

- Second… - There's a misunderstanding.

I came here for my son. I didn't come here to bother you.

I'm so sorry. Then everything is fine.

- I thought you came here for her. - No.

- I'm done with her. - That's better.

If that's so, since I like you, you could be my best man.

- Sure. Are you getting married? - We are.

It's a joke, isn't it?

- Isn't it? - No, I'm marrying him.

5 years have gone by, I can divorce you now.

It's not to get into your business,

but I'd think about it.

- Marriage is an important step. - Get out of here. And watch your back.

- Or I… - Giovanni, no.

No. You'll get in trouble.

Like this. Got it?

If you keep bothering us, I'll break you.

- Like the scissors. - Get that monkey too.

Alfredo, stop drinking.

It gives you heartburn.

- She will marry him. - Just give up.

How can it be?

She will marry a big monkey who breaks scissors with two fingers…

What the fuck…

At night, he counts all his money to buy a new refrigerator.

I hate seeing you like this.

And I'm not that healthy.

Will you keep drinking?

- I mean, look… - Yes, of course.

Where are you? Look.

- You're drunk. - Yes, a little.

But I'm a lovely, handsome drunk who likes to live life

and have fun.

Not like that jerk of a taxi driver built like a fridge.

Are you crying now?

I'm not crying! Damn, it was vinegar!

Excuse me, Miss. Which way to the Opera House?

Go straight, then right at the traffic light…

No! Help! Let go of me!

Drive!

- No! Let me go! - Move.

Let go of me!

Do you want to marry Giovanni? I'll give you a nice wedding gift.

- Let go of me! Cowards! - Calm down!

Cowards!

Nasty cowards!

Here. This is what I wanted. For you to spit on me again.

Do you think you're scaring me?

Do what you have to do. But if I get out of here alive

Giovanni will kill you! Do you get it? He'll cut you open!

You always talk about Giovanni. Tell him about this too.

Go.

Scram, you two!

Go ahead.

What are you waiting for?

Make your mind up.

Come on! It's the one thing you were always good at.

Come on, I'm here. I'm all yours.

You don't fancy me anymore? Come here, come on.

I can't do it.

It's stronger than me.

Do you need help? Let one of your friends start.

They can show you how it's done.

Didn't you want to give me a gift? Do it then!

Hey! Where are you? Come here.

He needs help.

- You, what's your name? - Pierino, at your service.

If you want to make love, I'm here.

- Fuck off. - Out of my way, piece of shit.

Keep your hands to yourself!

What are you doing?

Well?

Stop now!

Let go of him.

I won't forget your faces.

Let's go. These two are crazy.

MY FATHER

The other day my father brought me King Kong.

Not the big one, but a very tiny one.

My mom didn't want to keep him so he had to take it back to the circus.

My father always gives me wonderful gifts.

What's wrong? Are you not feeling well?

Nothing, I just can't sleep.

Hello?

Oh my God! When?

Yes. Yes, I'm coming.

It was Omero, from the restaurant.

Alfredo's mom is sick.

She's at the hospital.

They can't find him.

Giovanni, I need to find him and take him there.

That poor woman wants to see him.

- Alright, I'll take you. - Let me go alone.

Please.

It's me, Adelina! Open the door.

Look who's here!

What do you want at this hour? Did you come for a quicky?

Alfredo's mom is sick. Where can I find him?

Wait, I'll get the keys.

Maybe he's home.

Alfredo!

He's not home.

He spends most nights at an old lady's house, in front of your apartment.

- So he can look at you. - For real?

Yes. What do you have more than me?

Hair, two eyes, two legs… We look the same.

Actually not, because I've always cared for him!

And yet, he loves you.

You're heartless.

You don't treat people like that.

See? He'd come here and look.

When you turned off the lights…

he'd close the window, poor soul.

He'd come in…

sit there…

and we'd talk. About everything.

He'd keep me company. My kids never come visit me.

I wish he were my son.

One day we decided to put a camping bed here.

Look.

He sleeps here. See?

But today he didn't come.

Here, that's him. I gave him a key.

This way, if he comes back late I don't have to get up.

He's drunk. It happens sometimes, poor soul.

Alfredo.

I'm Adelina.

Alfredo, you have to be strong.

Go in.

Mum!

She can't hear you. She's been unconscious for two hours.

Mum…

Mum…

Carlo…

Have you come for me?

- Carlo. - Yes?

You are not jealous of Omero, are you?

She thinks she's talking to my father.

Alfredo?

Where's Alfredo, that hothead?

I'm here, can't you hear me?

I'm here, next to you.

Alfredo!

Mom, laugh!

I came to give you good news.

- Did you hear that? - Alfredo.

I settled down, I have a job.

A steady job. Are you happy?

You don't have to worry about me.

- And where is Adelina? - I'm here, Mum.

Good, I'm glad.

You're back together.

Yes, Mum

Tell her.

Yes, Mum. We are back together.

That's a relief.

I'm so happy about it.

Mum!

Do you recognize him? Do you?

You just spoke to him, don't you remember?

Mrs. Menghini!

At least the last time she opened her eyes…

she saw us together.

She died happy.

Our split really saddened her.

When you told her that we were back together,

she smiled.

You said it in a way that it didn't sound like a lie.

Poor Mum.

And to think that…

If it wasn't for her death…

I wouldn't have seen you again.

Right.

Now that she is gone,

I'm all alone.

Adelina…

It's our anniversary on the 18th.

Spend that day with me.

And I won't ask you anything anymore.

Look at you! You're looking healthy.

It happens when I think about my wife.

- You could knock first. - It's not the first one I see.

I could be your mother.

This is for you.

- I know it's a big day for you. - It's so nice. Thank you.

- I bet it's expensive. - I saved on food.

- Happy anniversary. - I'm sorry!

Thank you!

I knew you'd bring Pasquale!

- Do you mind? - No. This is for you.

Open it.

I'm not sure you'll like it. Try it.

How is it?

Thank him or we won't move from here!

Thank you.

Do you see these buildings?

Do you?

Back when your mother and I loved each other, there wasn't any.

It was a beautiful field.

See how good I am? Did Giovanni teach you?

Let your mum play as well.

Catch it!

- Mum, kick the ball. - Come on!

Same school!

Goal!

The happy couple!

Take your first dance!

I'll dance with mum. Sit down and watch us.

I know you wanted to.

Come, fisherman.

Hope you're better at this than with 7ootball.

- Why did we come here? - I don't know.

The car just came here.

Like horses do when they know the route.

Do you remember how nice it was here in spring?

I told Giovanni that I was going out with you.

That's good news.

We have nothing to hide.

What should we hide? You brought Pasqualino too.

Giovanni trusts me.

There's nothing like trust…

We made so many good memories here.

e spent a life together.

- So many great memories… - And so many bad memories!

Pasqualino!

Pasqualino!

Where are you going?

When you brought me here, I knew what you were aiming for.

Did you now?

There should be a plaque here.

And it should be say, in big gold letters, "Here, on May 16th 1967,

Alfredo and Adelina made love for the first time."

And then, in capital letters… "It was amazing".

May 16th 1967.

You remember the exact date.

You're a real bastard!

In life there are things that can't be forgotten.

Let's go.

But you forgot all that you did to me?

Today, can you just pretend it didn't happen? Come.

I know you'll never change. You're crazy.

You're a lazybones…

and a hothead.

And now you're determined you want to make love to me.

You've been acting up all day.

I'm warning you, it's just for one time.

Turn it off.

- Why just one time? - Shut up!

Are you going out?

I took a day off to spend it with you.

I'm sorry, but you didn't tell me.

I promised my Mum to take her to the movies.

She doesn't go out much.

You went out with her also yesterday and the day before.

- You don't have time for me. - What are you talking about?

My Mum wants to go to the movies.

If there's something wrong, just tell me.

You look tired and pale. And tense.

- And it's been a while… - I'm not feeling well.

You can't expect a woman to be always ready to make love.

It's late.

Did you see Alfredo again?

No! He disappeared, thank God.

- Did you call the lawyer? - Yes.

This week he's busy.

Why are you wearing that hat?

How many questions, Giovanni! It's the 1930s fashion!

Take care. Sorry, I-m running late.

- Good morning. - Good morning.

- Take me to Porto Ticinese. - Adelina! How is Giovanni doing?

I haven't seen him lately.

Weren't you supposed to go somewhere?

- I'll walk. Thank you. - As you please.

Alfredo, what am I doing?

You're here, he's there.

This is no life.

He wanted to make love. It's been more than a month.

I can't keep saying no. We sleep in the same bed!

Don't remind me of that.

- He's here! - Who?

What a scare! I thought it was him!

I think he suspects that I'm cheating on him.

If he finds us together, he'll kill us both!

- Come away from the window. - I know. But I…

- You're making me nervous too. - I can't handle this anymore.

Listen…

Not to be pedantic, but he's the lover.

I'm your husband.

You're right! I always forget that.

We are married.

- Good morning. - Are you alone?

- Yes, don't you see it? - Do you have any luggage?

Coming with the next flight.

- Here. - Thank you.

- Room number? - 322.

Thanks.

- Hello? - Did everything go well?

Yes.

- Did someone see you? - I don't think so.

It's room 322. Get the first lift, I'll get the third one.

You understand? The first one! Go, I'll follow you.

You know, my love…

Sometimes I think…

Why don't we get married?

You're crazy.

Why not?

We'll throw a big party

and then we'll have a child.

Let's call him Pasqualino.

It's a very nice name!

How did you come up with that name? You have such imagination.

If only we could go back…

What is stopping us?

You just have to dump Giovanni.

But he didn't do anything wrong.

He loves me.

How could I tell him, "Sorry, but we were just playing."

- You will tell him. - Me?

He loves you, not me.

No. I can't tell him, you will.

Me?

Listen, don't worry.

I know who will tell him.

Yesterday the ball, today the match.

Do you need something?

- He's not stupid. - Don't listen to him.

We are friends, aren't we?

Aren't you happy that I made up with your mum?

I've been helping you for a month. What else do you want?

What do I want?

You must tell Giovanni.

Dad is afraid to get beaten up.

- Shut up! - He'll beat me up!

This is your stuff. I'm just a kid.

Don't be silly, you'd help mum and dad.

- We'll be together again. - But I'll decide when and how.

Thank you. Can you do something for me?

Can you get me a pack of cigarettes? You know which ones.

Thank you.

Your 10,000 note.

- Are you crazy? - Take it out.

Bring back the change. It's 10,000 liras.

- All right. - Good.

You're sending a child to pay with fake money.

No one will suspect a child. And it's so crowded.

It's a good fake. Plus, we must try it.

- Hand me a real 10,000 note. - I don't have it.

I trust my memory. They look alike.

I told you a million times, I want to get back with Adelina.

- I want her to have everything. - It's a serious crime.

Other things are more important, my dear Salomone.

Look.

Can you believe it?

We have to suffer for these silly little pieces of paper!

We become their slaves! They can go fuck themselves.

- Did you find them? - Yes.

Thank you.

Take out the other banknotes.

- Do you… - Take it out now or else…

Pasqualino, you want a bike don't you?

Dad will buy you one. Here.

Tomorrow you can go get one.

Adelina!

What's wrong? Why are you crying?

Why? Do you want to send him down the wrong path just like you?

Why?

If you'd ask me, I'd change that money.

But he's a child.

You don't think about what you do.

You're a mess and you'll never change, damn you.

And damn me, because I love you.

I don't know why, maybe because you're crazy.

A hothead.

I'll never find someone like you.

How could I?

Why do you tell me all of this while you're crying?

- These things should be said… - I'm crying.

Because when you love someone, it's hard to leave him.

Don't you get too upset, Alfredo.

I will leave Giovanni too. I can't stay with him.

I care for you, but Pasqualino and I are leaving.

We'll leave.

- Let's talk for a minute. - There's nothing left to say.

You know it's the best thing to do. I do it for Pasqualino.

If it was for me, I'd stay with you.

What a shame!

What a shame!

What a shame?

For a few fake notes?

If you love me like you say…

you can't dump me for that.

It's silly.

Adelina.

Adelina, you scared me.

You scared me more than when you screamed,

when you hit me,

when you spat on me.

I never saw you like that before.

Are you…

Are you for real, Adelina?

Pasqualino!

- Hi Dad. - Hi.

Has something happened to you? You look a fright.

- Nothing. Just come with me. - I can't.

- Why? I'll take you to a nice place. - Mum is coming.

I'll take you to Africa again. Come with me.

No! She'll get scared if she doesn't see me.

Enough! You're my son and you're coming with me. End of story!

- No, Dad! Wait! - Enough! You'll do what I say.

- I'm sorry. Just trust your dad. - No, please.

We'll phone Mum and she'll come too. Come.

- Pasqualino, don't make me drag you. - I don't want to!

- Come on! - Let go of me!

- Let go of me! - You're pissing me off!

- Did Menghini come out? - The fifth grade already left.

Maybe he's playing over there.

Thank you.

- Did you see Pasqualino? - No, Miss, I'm sorry.

Hey…

- Did you see Pasqualino? - No.

- Andrea, did you see him? - No, Miss.

- Has something happened? - I can't find my son.

He's skinny, long hair, he wears a blue coat and a backpack.

- He should be here. - I saw a child like that.

- Where? - A gipsy was dragging him away.

Oh my God!

- Help me, please! - He can't be far.

Come, he went that way.

Get on that motorbike! Get a ride.

Move!

Don't worry, I'll stop a car!

Stop!

Let us in, a kid was kidnapped. Hurry!

Faster! He went that way!

- It must be that one! - I'll go!

People like that should be hanged!

- Who are they? - Go fuck yourself! Come with me.

Damn traffic!

- Leave that kid alone! - What do you want?

- Let go of him! - Here he is!

What do you want?

Pasqualino! He's my son!

Let go of me!

What the fuck? It's a misunderstanding!

Let me go!

Come down!

Coward!

Let go of me!

- Pasqualino! - Mum!

- They are killing dad! - Let go of him!

That's my husband!

What did they do to you!

Son of a bitch…

They beat me to a pulp.

Let me look at you one last time.

- Let me look at you… - Alfredo…

You're so beautiful.

Don't get scared, I'll call an ambulance.

I'm all broken. Let me die here.

- I'll die peacefully. - Don't die, Dad!

If it was up to me…

I wouldn't die. Fucking hell!

What matters is…

- that we love each other, right? - Yes.

- It's all my fault. - Take care of Mum.

Don't speak.

No! Open your eyes!

Alfredo!

I'm sorry. But now…

I'll leave you now.

You two, try to be happy.

Pasqualino…

Tell me one more thing, before I die.

If… I didn't die,

would you come back to me?

Yes, I told you.

Where can I find someone like you?

You pieces of shit!

Do I have to die to be loved?

- Good job! - You forgave me only when I was dying!

But I'm born again! See? Laugh! I'm more alive than ever!

I'm just like Lazarus. You said it, now you must stay. Let's go.

Careful, next time! You were just about to kill me!

We thought…

You look like a cat! And cats don't think. Fuck you!

- Fuck you! - You staged everything!

- You made fun of us all! - Come, Adelina.

- Bastard! - I told you, I'm a juggler!

- I'll kill you! - Now she's hitting me! Pasqualino!

- Say bye to them. - Come here, I'm not done.

Shitheads!

- Alfredo… - Come, Pasqualino.

- Damned you! - Adelina, laugh!

Don't forget Saint Ambrogio's words, "Mind your fucking business!"