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Good evening.
If you see three young men with electric guitars, please send them back.
They seem to have wandered off.
They can't be far, however, for they are still plugged in. All evidence to the
contrary. I'm convinced that music has charms.
to soothe the savage breast.
For example, this set of drums was made by a tribe of Aborigines, a people
completely uncivilized, yet they built every one of these lovely instruments
out of human skin.
Of course, when it came to drumsticks, they were rather unoriginal.
They make these out of plastic, which we supply them at a modest profit.
Unfortunately, we keep running out of salesmen. This evening's program is not
completely musical.
We also bring you a play. It concerns violence and revenge in a small mountain
town. The time, one minute from now.
Now, you drive carefully, Stoney. All right, all right.
You ain't got no right, Fred. I got all the right in the world. This is my
place. Now, I won't allow you to talk out to Riley McGrath like that at my
place. Now, you go on home, Stoney.
Go on.
I'm awful sorry about that disturbance, Mr. McGrath. Oh, forget it. Oh!
You got some good pickled pig's feet. Yes, sir. Fresh jar.
Fine, fine, fine.
Hey, hey, bring us a couple more beers.
Yes, sir. Two beers coming up.
Let's go, man. Don't touch me, boy.
Let him have his say.
This is a free country, Mr. McGrath.
Wouldn't you say so?
It is a free country. Yeah. And nobody's going to stop me from saying what I'm
going to say to you. Get on with it.
You may be fooling everybody around here, but you ain't fooling me.
I'm not going to sell.
I've worked too hard. I'm paying for my hundred acres, and no law of yours is
forcing me to sell.
Get him out of here.
Come on, Stoney, get out of here.
You're a crook.
Get out of here. Now.
I ain't afraid of you, Mr. McGrath. Not like everybody else in this state.
You're a liar.
Fred, call 634.
Get Sheriff Reynolds here right away. If his wife answers, find out where he is.
Tell her who you're calling for.
Yes, sir.
22. It's my turn.
I didn't miss.
You ain't ever gonna miss.
I want a turn before I have to go to sleep.
Okay, here.
That don't count.
I wasn't ready.
Okay, that don't count.
all day is cornbread that's his supper there's still two pieces left
there
he is now no it ain't him ain't the old truck old truck makes more noise
than that
You Stoney Larkin's boy?
Yeah.
What's the matter?
Where's my daddy?
Both you, his boys?
Well, you boys better come with me.
It's been an accident.
Go on, Fred.
Mr. McGrath shot him, sure, but old Stoney was acting like a wild man.
Mr. McGrath said he had a couple of beer bottles in his hands, was coming after
him with these bottles.
Is that right?
Yes, sir.
And you would say it was self-defense?
Well, he was coming at him with these bottles, and he was drunk.
Yes, sir.
My daddy didn't have no gun on him.
If he'd had a gun on him...
And I'd been pointing it at him.
Oh, and that'd be a different thing.
But it ain't self-defense to me when a man with a gun shoots down a man that
ain't got none.
Well, it seemed to me like self-defense.
What was Riley McGrath doing here in the first place?
Well, he was just stopping by.
His way back from an important political rally in Charleston.
Why didn't McGrath stay then?
There was no real need for him to stay here.
I went right to his home. I questioned him there.
Got all the information I need.
He was tired, upset, taking handfuls of heart pills.
I told him to go to bed, get a good night's sleep.
You two boys did the same.
That all you gonna do?
Well, son, there's seven people here all seen it.
They all tell the same story, all willing to swear it was self-defense.
Come on, Virg.
Well, here's the key to his truck.
The stuff is in his pocket.
This one here. Here, take it.
Had a good day.
Sold about half of them.
Look at all the money, Virg.
Good price, too, today.
About ten dollars.
Now, don't you cry, Wilford.
You hear me? Don't you cry on me.
Can't have folks sitting up all night and not feed them.
I don't know nobody what'll come.
We never see nobody.
Stoney never was social.
It's wrong to grow up without making friends.
You boys never having friends.
When you die, there's nobody to sit up with you.
I don't think he'd care.
Look at this table.
How'd this table get this way?
Those mumbly peg holes.
Me and Virgin Daddy play monthly peg on the table.
Your mama had this table brought all the way from Charleston.
Cost her nearly $50.
There's the load.
Likens, you'd be very smart just to forget all about this.
Just stay here, picky peaches.
Nothing you can do.
Birds!
Ain't out of me and ain't Mary Jane in here.
They cooked up lots of food.
I'll be right there, Wilford.
You put some water on the stove, huh?
I'm gonna need a bite.
Count of jail's mighty dirty.
You got fleas in your jail, Sheriff.
Fleas and trained rats.
Well, I wouldn't do anything to have to spend any more nights there.
You had the comfortable cell.
And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying, Command the children of Israel that they
bring unto thee pure olive oil beaten for the light to cause the lamps to burn
continually.
Without the veil of the testimony in the tabernacle of the congregation shall
Aaron order it from the evening unto the morning before the Lord continually.
It shall be a statute forever in your generations.
No one's going to go to bed?
I'll go to bed tomorrow night, after he's out of the house and in the ground
for good.
You go on, go to sleep.
No, I ain't going to leave you sitting up alone.
And Ida Mae and Aunt Mary Jane are here.
They don't count.
It wasn't self-defense, Wilford.
Daddy may have come out of him.
But he wasn't gonna hurt him, none.
No?
He shot Daddy just like he chewed a quail.
They said he was drunk, Virg.
That don't make no difference.
Daddy's dead.
I know.
Ain't nothing we can do about it.
Yes.
Yes, there is something.
Can't bring him back to life.
Can't make him be out in the orchard in the morning before the sun comes up.
Calling us to come help.
No.
Can't do nothing about that.
Well, that's what I said.
But there is something.
Something to do.
No. Don't say that, Virg.
There's nothing.
Like Mama. It's all gone.
I'm fixing to do it, Wilford.
It's all I've been thinking about ever since I saw Daddy dead on the sawdust
floor.
What are you talking about?
And he that killeth any man shall surely be put to death.
And he that killeth a beast shall make it good, beast for beast.
And if a man cause a blemish in his neighbor, as he hath done, so shall it
be done to him.
Breach for breach, eye for eye, tooth for tooth.
Chapter 24, verses 17 through 20.
I don't know for sure what you're saying, Virg.
Saying I'm gonna kill Riley McGrath.
Virg. Shh.
Now I done set my mind to it.
Ain't nothing gonna stop me.
Mr. McGrath.
Virg, I've been waiting for you.
You been out possum hunting?
Virg, I'm talking to you.
I'm scared here all alone at night, Virg. You know that.
This is the third night this week you've been gone all night, and I don't like
it. I had to get up and set out on the porch till the sun come up.
Know where Riley McGrath is right now?
He's setting up in his office, opening up his morning mail, and drinking
coffee.
Long about 10 o'clock, he's gonna go downstairs to the Sigafoose Barbershop.
Get a shave and a shine.
That's the expensive barbershop I showed you once outside of the square.
Haircuts cost $1.25.
By Wilford Riley McGrath has his haircut once a week whether he needs it or not
Then back up to his office to do more dirty work
Long about 1215 He'll go downstairs get out
and get something to eat He ain't got no favorite
place to have dinner
But every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, he has supper over at the Stonewall
Jackson Hotel.
You should see that hotel, Wilford.
It's got these big glass lights about the size of our trucks hanging all over
the place from the ceiling.
They're just sparkling and glowing like icicles.
And every Tuesday night, he goes and visits a lady friend over by the
railroad station.
Saturday nights, he goes and plays poker over at the County Judges.
And every other Thursday, he goes and sees Dr.
Sanders.
He's got a bad heart, Wilford.
How come you know so much about him, Bert?
I made it my business.
That's what I've been doing for the past month, following him around.
Ever since the morning after the funeral.
Oh, he ain't seen me.
Don't know nothing about it.
But I wanted to know where he was every minute of every day.
I almost shot him this morning.
Almost shot him down just like you shoot down an old quail.
Then I got to thinking, that ain't enough.
Burge, you're talking like a loon.
I want him to know my name when I kill him, Wilford.
I'll figure out a way.
You're just gonna get your own self killed.
Burge? You're all the family I got.
I'm going to go to bed now, Wilfred.
It ain't dark, Burge.
I'm too tired to care what time of day it is.
Wake me for dinner, will you?
We're having field peas.
Hey, boy.
You looking for somebody?
Yes, sir.
I'm looking for Mr. Riley McGray.
Well, he ain't in his office.
He's next door having a haircut.
Thank you, sir.
Thank you very much.
Thank you, sir.
Hey, y'all. Mr.
McGrath.
Hey, you're five-eighths Indian, Sigafoose.
You want a scalping, sonny? No, sir. I want to talk to Mr.
McGrath. He'll talk to me. Oh, I'm sure he'll talk to you, son.
A man like Mr. McGrath never gets too important so he can't talk to fellas on
the street.
Isn't that right, Riley?
You know this boy, Sigafoose?
Never seen him before in my life.
But I remember.
You from around here, son?
Yes, sir. Out to North Road, please.
How come I don't recognize... like seeing you around town for me and my
brother we hardly ever get in yeah well what is it oh oh well come on speak
up what is it can i talk to you i don't know can you you're the one
finding it hard to do well what is it and five is ten and ten is twenty
thank you mighty mcgrath Here, buy your squaw some wampum beads.
You're too kind, great white father.
My daddy will stony like it.
Is that so?
Well,
come on up to my office.
I have an appointment in 15 minutes with Judge Beam, but I can give you a minute
or so.
I sure appreciate it.
This matter was settled in the last term of Judge Beam's court a week and a half
ago.
Your father attacked me, son.
I shot him in self-defense.
And nobody regrets that more than I do.
I just don't want nothing to happen to my brother Verge. Well, nothing's going
to happen to your brother. Something might.
Verge claims he's fixing to kill you, Mr. McGrath.
That's all he's been talking about for two weeks now.
It's a foolish thing to talk about.
How come you're telling me about it?
Well, I thought if maybe you was to send for Virg and talk to him yourself, you
know, explain how it was self-defense, it might help.
Stubborn as he can be when he sets his mind to something, but he ain't dumb.
His whole family got left, except Daddy's sisters, and they live way out
past Pine Eye Valley.
Uh, where'd you say you live?
Beyond North Road, about 20 miles out. You'll turn off Appalachian Way. Well,
not too fast now.
Uh, beyond the North Road.
About 20 miles out.
Turn off Appalachian Way.
Appalachian... Way.
But nothing's going to happen to your brother, son.
As long as he behaves himself.
However, I know how it is to lose your daddy.
I lost my daddy two years ago.
Lost my mama eight months ago.
High blood pressure.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah, the heart is a delicate thing.
I know.
I know that death and the family brings with it certain unexpected expenses.
Bird says we gotta plant some cotton to pay for daddy's coffin.
do something for you, boy.
Something that I'm not obliged to do.
And something I'm gonna do out of the goodness of my heart.
Something to spread a little oil on these obviously troubled waters.
Take it, son.
Take it and go with my blessings.
Thank you.
And he was real nice, and he... Verge, he took me up into his office there, and
I talked to him a little bit, and he told me about how his mama just died of
a heart attack, and I told him... I know what you told him.
Verge, I had to.
Well, what would happen to me if you'd done something silly and they took you
away and sat you down in the electric chair?
That was a fool thing to do.
Don't be mad at me, Verge.
Look.
What Mr. McGrath gave me. Told me it was to spread oil on troubled waters.
There's five $100 bills there.
Five, Virg. I counted them.
Well, this makes things a sight easier.
Huh?
Saves a lot of fuss, I reckon.
Hope you thank Mr. McGrath for the money, Wilford. I don't know whether I
did or not. Well, I hope you did.
You weren't born in a barn, you know. Mama did teach you some manners.
Well, now I know exactly what I'm going to do.
I'm going to write Aunt Ida Mae and Aunt Mary Jane a note.
Ask them to come back here and take care of you while I'm gone.
What do you mean? Where are you going?
I'm going to Charleston.
To Charleston?
Mm-hmm. Well, what are you going to Charleston for?
Well, I got me some money.
Gonna go to school.
What kind of school?
The kind of school that's gonna teach me how to kill Mr. Riley McGrath the way I
want.
They got a killing school in Charleston?
Real slow.
Says he has to look at my face for a long time.
And he knows it's coming.
Well, now, you promised me, Wilford, if Mr. Riley McGrath comes looking for you
or me, you tell him I took that money and I went to Charleston, but you don't
know what I'm doing there.
You hear me, Wilford? You don't know what I'm doing there.
Cross your heart and hope to die.
Cross my heart and hope to die.
You're going to leave right now?
Well, the sooner I leave, the sooner I'll be back.
Now, don't you cry on me.
Will you send me some picture postcards? I'll send you some picture postcards.
Bye. Bye.
and break stations.
Just a minute lady I'll take
Who's
that for that's for you, mr. McGrath me
Burge Larkins
Get the car.
Yoo-hoo!
Wilford! Mail came!
Woo-hoo!
Wilford!
Another card come for you, Wilford. From Burge? Just like all the others.
He write anything on it this time?
Not a word.
Well, he don't have to write nothing on them, just as long as he keeps sending
them to me. Seems to me like an awful waste of money unless you fill it up
with words.
Look at these poke greens I found under the hill. We can have poke salad for
supper. Salt meat and cornbread. Sounds mighty good.
Idy May, looky here. How good Wilford wiped out all those knife holes out of
the table.
I swear, a man in the house without women, you just never know.
Well, you better get the greens on.
Six.
Six.
One a month for six months.
Six months Bird's been gone.
Seems about like six years to me.
You miss your brother, don't you?
Well, who could that be?
Maybe it's Bird.
Lakin's family live here?
Reckon we do.
You Verge Lakin?
No.
Verge ain't here.
You his brother?
His brother Wilford.
Mr. McGrath wants to talk to you, Wilford. Sent me out here to fetch you.
You don't have to go nowhere, Wilford. It's all right.
I talked to Mr. McGrath before.
I get to ride in that big car out there.
Sure.
Be right back.
There you are.
Let's go. Mr. McGrath's waiting.
I want to ride in the back seat.
Sure. Get in.
I don't mean us. Oh.
You
know
anything about that?
It's from your brother.
Where is he?
He's in Charleston.
I got a call from him this morning.
What's his address in Charleston?
He ain't never put one on any of the cards.
Not been able to ever write to him.
How long has he been in Charleston?
The day you talked to me, I came home, gave him the money, and he left right
then.
What's he doing in Charleston?
Speak up.
I don't know.
What do you think your brother's doing in Charleston?
I hadn't thought about it.
You wouldn't keep anything from me, would you?
I wouldn't like that if you would.
You have no idea what your brother's doing down there?
No, sir.
I believe you, boy.
You're a smart boy.
Fine, fine.
Strong. There's no reason for you to keep a secret from me, is there?
Huh?
I said, there's no reason for you to keep a secret from me, is there?
D.D., see that Mr. Likens is taken care of.
Drive him home.
You've sure got a wonderful car.
I never knew they put air conditioning in cars.
Give me another beer.
Yes, sir.
Get rid of that thing.
Yes, sir.
Wait a minute. Yeah?
Can you turn on the air conditioning?
Sure thing.
Did you forget something?
That's just what I was going to ask you.
Where's your brother?
Charleston. I know he's in Charleston. What's he doing there? I don't know.
Now,
where's
your brother?
Like I told you.
I don't know.
You beat on me till the sun goes down.
I haven't told everything I know.
Don't be a great day, huh?
Morning, Mr. McGrath.
You got me a Tommy Hawk, Sigafoose. I'm in a big hurry.
Yeah, another ten minutes to go on Mars here.
Well, I have to be at the boys' club in half an hour.
I'm making a speech on the flora and the fauna of this great state of ours.
Think I can trust young Mac here to give me a good close shave? Mac's on a
vacation. Left yesterday afternoon for California.
But it's okay, Mr. McGrath.
I had a replacement for a couple of weeks. Tried him out myself this
morning. I guarantee you, Riley, he'll give you a fine, fine shave.
Sugarfoos, how's Maddie and the kids?
Mean as ever.
All of them.
There you are, Marsh.
You can see your ears now.
What you looking for, son?
A fresh shot of towels, Mr. Sigafoose.
Tons of towels out back.
I'll go get them for you. You just tend to Mr. McGrath and see he gets to the
boys' club on time.
Mr.
Sigafoose, we're gonna need some bay rum up here, too.
I heard you.
What's your name, boy?
Jones.
Odell Jones.
You're on a very close shave now.
Well, Riley, I hope you appreciate the quality of lather he's whipped up for
you. Fine, fine.
You know, I could have sworn I had an extra bottle of bay rum in there.
Well, I'll run up to the drugstore and get some.
Mr. Sigafoose? Mr.
Sigafoose?
We're gonna need a big bottle of witch hazel. I hear ya.
I just want to save him from making two trips.
You didn't cut off my sideburns, did you?
No, sir.
Well, make sure you don't.
Yes, sir.
You related to the Jones that's got the fishing pier on the Big Sandy?
Nope.
You sure look familiar.
Well, now, Mr. McGrath, I ought to meet you for quite a spell.
Seen you once in a parade.
Been told by some folks I look like my daddy.
But he didn't want to take the blame. Said I look like my mama.
Is your daddy the Jones guy at the hardware store on Baltimore Street?
I know, sir, Mr. McGrath.
My daddy's dead.
He didn't have no fishing pier or hardware store.
All he ever had was a little piece of land.
100 acres in the bottom.
Real poor.
Had to work real hard for that land.
Trying to put a road through there.
My daddy wouldn't sell.
Who'd have thought?
One of those hot summer days out there picking peaches.
All that peach fuzz itching all over your arms.
All that fuzz gets up your nose.
Who'd ever thought that one of his boys one day be able to go into Charleston
and learn a real fancy trade like barbering.
Never had a store-bought haircut in his whole life.
He would have been proud.
In fact, he only got to Charleston once in his life, before he married my ma.
Charleston? Mm-hmm.
You've been in Charleston?
Best barber college around.
I was right lucky.
Get hired like this. First job I applied for right out of school.
You're not Odell Jones.
That's not your name. Hold on.
Mr. McGrath, you're gonna have to sit still, Mr. McGrath.
You know, you jerk around like that, I might cut you.
Now that I got me a trade, I'm figuring on saving my money up, sending my
brother Wilford to the big city, open up a barber shop of our own.
Oh, Mr.
McGrath, please sit still.
I might slip and cut you right through to the gullet.
Oh, and now, Mr. McGrath, remember your heart, okay?
Remember your heart.
Open the door!
Now, I wouldn't say nothing if I were you.
I just, I wouldn't cry out or nothing like that.
Just sit real still.
What's happening in here?
Brought this razor with me all the way from Charleston.
It's a hand-honed Sheffield.
Now, I spent the whole night stropping this blade, Mr. McGrath.
Just thinking about this moment.
I hope my brother thanked you for the money, Mr. McGrath.
Your generosity, springing out of your guilt, has made this all possible.
Now hold very still, Mr. McGrath.
Very still.
Because my name, Mr. McGrath, is Verge Likens.
Verge Likens.
Verge Likens, Mr. McGrath.
Verge Likens.
Now, this here is the scary part, Mr. McGrath.
Because, well...
That old juggler vein is right about there.
When I came back here, he had this door locked.
Open this door.
I'll be right there.
I found the bay room, Mr.
Sigafoose. It was in the drawer with the scissors.
There you go, Mr. McGrath.
All done.
He's dead.
You're under arrest.
For what?
You're under arrest for killing Riley McGrath.
Well, you can't arrest me, Sheriff.
What do you mean I can't arrest you?
Well, there ain't no law against giving a man a shave.
Gave him a real good one, too.
See for yourself.
Ain't a scratch on him.
By the way... I know the secret of these wigs.
They are actually earmuffs, so you don't have to listen to your own music.
Next week we shall be back with another story, and perhaps by then my three
companions will have returned.
Until then, good night.
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