Original subtitles

Kellogg's, the best to you each morning from Kellogg's.

brought to you by Kellogg's your best choice in cereals the best to you each

morning

Blab, the time has come when you are no longer a low-grade dumb skull assistant

private eye.

Snoop, you mean at long last.

I'm going to be a... I'm afraid to say it. I'm shaking like a leaf.

Well, I'm not, so I'll say it for you, Blab.

I'm moving you up to high-grade smart skull private eye.

You wouldn't be pulling my skinny leg just to break up a dull morning, would

you, Snoop? I certainly would.

But today I mean it.

Does that mean I get a salary, too?

Ah, there you go, Blamp. Getting grandiose ideas already.

I'm sorry, Snoop. I was carried away.

The mark of a good private eye is that he keeps a tight fist on the purse

strings. And Snoop is one of the tightest.

Answer the phone, high-grade smart skull private eye blab.

Snooper Detective Agency.

Roses are red, violets are blue. If you got a problem, we'll solve it for you.

Oh, fine.

Who? The warden of Sing Song Prison?

Uh, what can we do for you, warden?

I'd like you to prevent a jailbreak.

Can you come over right away?

Yes, sir. My partner and I will be right there.

Goodbye, warden. Uh, what is it, Blab? A 708.

Let's go, Snoop.

What do you mean, let's go?

A 708 is an elderly Boy Scout trapped in a pup tent in Mesopotamia.

I'm sorry, Snoop. I mean a 709.

Rumor of a jailbreak at Sing Song Prison, eh? Oh, that's different.

Now, let's go.

Well, here we are, Blab. Sing-song prison.

Hey, you!

How did you prisoners get outside?

You're sadly misapprehensive, officer. The warden is expecting us.

Yeah, we're high-grade, smart-skull, private eyes.

You could have fooled me.

Come on in. The warden is waiting.

Tell me, warden, who do you think is going to make this jailbreak?

I'm not sure, but it could be this prisoner.

Why, that's Quick Change Quentin, the quick change artist.

That's right. He's waiting on tables in the mess hall.

Now, my plan is to throw you two in jail.

Why? We didn't break the law.

Quiet, you booby blab. Your job is to mingle with the convicts and keep an eye

on Quick Change Quentin.

So far, Snoop, you're the most suspicious character I've seen.

Do you think I ought to report you to the warden?

Uh, no, Blab. I was merely looking for quick change Quentin and Viola. There he

is.

The crook. He should be arrested.

Look, he's going into his quick change routine.

This is as good a time as any to make a break.

Kazoots!

And I'm George the Guard.

Hiya, George.

Hiya, George.

Huh? How can he be George when I'm already George?

Because he's quick-change Quentin, making his skullduggery getaway. And it

looks mighty suspicious, too.

It's those two nutty private eyes, Snooper and Blab.

Kazoots!

I better make a run for it.

Stop, quick change, or a solitary refinement for you. These guys are

harder to shake than wet salt.

He went into the jute mill, Snoop. With us, hot on his crooked trail.

We lost him.

What do they do here, Snoop?

Oh, uh, this is where the prisoners make rope, Blab.

Ah, that's a good idea.

And I'm a rope.

Hey, Snoop, look.

There's a lively hunk of rope.

That's no rope. That's Brick Change's weapon.

Draft his private eye.

All right, Brick Change. Give yourself up, or I shall blast you into teeny bits

of strings.

Ah, go fly a kite.

I've given you enough rope.

Take that.

He only had 37 more years to serve.

Which proves crime don't pay, even for a hunk of rope.

Well, pick them up and leave us to take them to the warden's office, Blab.

warden's office.

Stop, in the limit of law.

I got him, Blab. That warden's disguise don't fool me, quick change, Quentin.

I got you the warden, too, Snoop. If you don't let me go, you'll get 30 years for

this. And if you don't let me go, you'll get 30 years.

Um, will the real warden please stand up?

Which one is for real?

Okay, Blatt, but remember, 30 years is a long time.

Thanks, Snoop.

Okay, you may go, Warden. Thanks.

Now to be my ever-loving self again.

Kazoots!

Say, Blab, do you think you'll ever learn to play that thing?

I got 30 years to try, Snoop.

Vacation time.

Oh, boy, dear old dad.

Where are we going this year, huh? Where, where, where?

Well, we could hunt caribou in Timbuktu, moose in Mesopotamia, or even wild

pizza in South Pizzeria.

Which one have you chosen, Daniel Boondad?

Need the knife.

We're economically forced to fish for minnows at Shlump Swamp again this year.

Fish for minnows again?

Again it is, Augie.

Meanwhile, I'm for a nap.

If we leave right after supper and drive all night, we'll be there in the

morning.

Okay, disappointed father.

Poor dad.

He had his heart set on a hunting trip this year.

Wait a minute. I wonder how the hunting is on Mars.

My Martian friend, Akbar, could get us up there for free.

I'll ask him.

Let's see.

40 trillion megacycles bounced off Venus, lateral wavelength 70 degrees

northeast, into Martian magnetic field.

Hello, Mars.

Oggie Doggie calling Mars.

Come in, Mars.

Mars calling Oggie Doggie.

A mooka-cracka-cooka greeting to you, my friend.

And a mooka-cracka-cookie greeting to you, Akbar.

How is your dear old dad?

Well, uh...

How's the hunting up there?

Great. The wild breech season just opened.

We'd be happy to have you and your dear old dad.

Oh, boy, swell!

Why don't you bring your house along?

Then you'll have a place to stay while you're here.

Well, how will I do that?

Simply follow my instructions.

Are you ready?

I'm ready. Good.

Turn your magnetic current dial to zero degrees north.

Right. Now, engage the astro-oscillator slowly,

slowly, slowly.

This I gotta see.

Wowee! Mars, next stop.

Okay. What's going on?

Oh, nothing, dear old dad.

You were merely having a flight, Mayor.

I must remember not to eat chocolate marmalade pizza before beddy-bye.

Oh, boy.

Wait till dad finds out he's going hunting on Mars.

Will he ever be happy?

What was that?

I'd better wake up.

That's enough nightmares for one nap. You are awake, Puzzle Dad.

Welcome to Mars.

You mean like in Planet Mars?

That's right.

But may I ask what we're doing here, Augie, my boy?

We are going on a wild breech hunt.

I've always wanted to hunt wild breech, whatever they are.

Careful, Dad.

The Greech is a mighty tricky customer. Oh, of course they are. Everybody knows

that.

Hey, Dad, look at that cute little Martian animal.

Yeah, I wonder what he's called.

Look, he wants to tell you something.

What is it, little Martian creature?

And that, Oggy, my son, is the understatement of the year.

Halt, you Martian mischief-maker!

Now, where'd he go?

Did you get him? Sure shot, Dad?

I don't comprehend, Oggy boy.

There he was, then poof, there he wasn't.

I'll teach that greech not to screech.

Look, Dad. You got him.

Dad, look.

He's handing you a pitcher.

I'll see who it is.

He's kissing it first.

He must be a sentimental greech.

Auggie, my boy, I'm afraid it's a picture of his darling wife.

Oh, the shame of it. My own papa is a greech killer.

But Auggie, my boy, my boy, I got a hunting license.

Dad,

he wants to whisper his last words to you.

Probably a fond adieu to his beloved wife.

It's good to be back on good old terracotta once more.

Away from them greets.

Greets! Dad, it's the greets. Not the greets. It's the greets.

We've been invaded.

Can they stay, Dad?

Can they please, Dad?

Well, we're not taking them back to Mars, that's for sure.

Oh, Dad, it says here in my Martian English dictionary that the word

greets... means rabbit. It figures, Augie. It figures.

Well,

after all, how many families have genuine Martian breeches for house

guests?

Historians of the Old West could not possibly leave out the story of the

fabulous jackpot mine discovered by poor young jackpot.

He was just about ready to call it quits when...

He struck it rich.

Huh? I'm rich! I'm rich! I'm rich!

I also got me a splitting headache.

Poor young jack... The jackpot became rich old jackpot.

Somebody sweep up that messy gold dust off in my imported floor.

Things went just fine at the old jackpot mine until one day

disaster struck.

A polecat skunk decided to make the jackpot mine his permanent home.

Run for your lives in some fresh air.

No one could get near the mine, so old Jackpot sent for none other than that

famous lawman.

What's his name?

This is terrible embarrassing.

I guess

that's close enough.

Get that skunk out of my mine, and I'll make you a rich man, McGraw.

Skunks? Oh, so long, Quickstraw, I think.

Hold on there, Papa Louie. I'll tell you when to so long.

But, Quickstraw, I think this skunk business will bring on my allergies.

Relax, Papa Boy.

I'm going to get that skunk out of there with Snuffles, the biscuit-hungry home.

Well, we haven't seen Snuggles for a long time.

How we find him?

Oh, it's simple, Bubba Boy.

I just gotta hold up one of these here dog biscuits and... ...thrust-o!

Here,

catch!

No snuffles, no siree. Not till you get that skunk critter out of that thar

mine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well?

Uh-uh.

Huh?

Two biscuits?

I don't think I blame him, Quaistro.

He's a bargains.

Oh, well.

Okay.

What, you moocher?

You want three biscuits?

Nothing doing.

Uh-oh.

All right, three biscuits.

But not till after you get rid of that skunk.

Oh, boy.

It's Chihuahua.

He got rid of his skunks.

Well, what do you know?

Fresh out of dog biscuits.

Uh-oh.

Why, you no-good welcher.

What we do now, Quickstraw?

I'll go in and eliminate that skunk myself.

This clothespin will aid me in my perilous mission.

One side, snuffles!

Let me out! Let me out!

He won't let you out until he gets his biscuits.

What we do?

Buy some biscuits, Papa Louie.

I'll hold my breath till you get back.

Okay, Quickstraw.

And hurry, please. It's a matter of life and breath.

With lots of holes in the roof, out in the wide open spaces.

With that reward money.

Look, Quickstraw. I think Snuffles got the skunk in the bag.

Good work, Snuffles. Here, catch.

I forgive you.

What are we going to do with the little skunk?

The least we can do is give the little fella one of these biscuits.

Here, catch.

I

like

that quick straw.

He's got a soft heart and a head to match.

Yippee-yi-yo-ki-yay, galloping all the way, there goes quick-draw McGraw.

Kellogg's, your best choice in cereals. The best to you each morning has brought

you quick-draw McGraw.

Yippee-yi-yo-ki-yay, galloping all the way, brain-base are on his chest.

I'll draw the law of the rest, last is gone in the rest.

Yippee-yi-yo-ki-yay.

Let's go.