Original subtitles

[rock music playing]

Have you got your mic on, Mom?

- Oh, no. - [Jack] You got yours on, Dad?

Yup.

All righty.

Mom's like on her phone.

- Will you put that [bleep]. - I'm not doing anything.

You're addicted to the [bleep].

[Sharon] [bleep] sake.

It's funny because she never picks up when I call.

Or me.

[Jack] We may be the first family of darkness

but not all of us are true believers of the paranormal.

They wanna believe.

[Sharon] Has a ghost ever been

- caught on film? - Yes.

- And I have the evidence... - [man] Whoa, what the...

[Jack] ...that will blow their minds.

I think you're starting to believe.

Seeing is believing.

[man] Whoa, what is happening?

[Ozzy] Oh, God, no.

All right, gang, how we doing?

Good. Got a nice haircut today.

Yup. You know, trying to...

Trying to look presentable to the world.

So you were watching some

paranormal stuff on TV upstairs?

Well, I was sleeping through it.

[Jack] Oh. All right. So not saying much.

All right. Well,

we're gonna start off

with a bit of a conspiracy theory.

It's time to crawl down the rabbit hole.

Have you guys ever heard of the Mandela Effect?

[crickets chirping]

[Jack] Okay. I'm gonna explain to you

what the Mandela Effect is.

The Mandela Effect is an unusual phenomenon

were a large group of people remember something differently

than how it occurred.

Conspiracy theorists believe

this is proof of an ultimate universe

- or possible time travel. - I'm lost.

[Jack] All right. So the idea

is that someone went back in time

and changed our reality so we all remember

something correctly but history changed.

So even though our memory is right,

we're actually all wrong.

- Makes sense? - No.

[Jack] Okay. We're gonna play a game.

[man] How's your memory?

[Jack] Which one do you think is correct

and I'm basically doing this to see if you guys

have been affected by the Mandela Effect.

Okay. Prime example,

- the Monopoly Man. - Who's that?

[Jack] You know, Monopoly, the game?

- You know, the character... - The guy with the glasses.

[Jack] Okay. You just said it.

Does he have glasses or a monocle?

- A monocle. - [Ozzy] No.

[Jack] Which one's correct?

[Ozzy] The first one.

[Jack] Dad, you are correct but yes, he...

The Monopoly Man does not have a monocle.

Well, maybe he does in England.

[Ozzy] [indistinct]

And that's the thing, is that I remember him

having a monocle growing up.

He does not have a monocle.

[Ozzy] [bleep] this isn't considered a ghost.

[Jack] It's... Well,

because we don't always do ghost.

We capture the...

- You know, it, um, uh... - Ball lightning.

[thunder rumbles]

[Jack] Okay. Hold on,

I have a few more I want you to see.

- So there's Nelson Mandela. - [Sharon] Nelson Mandela.

- [Ozzy speaking] - [Jack] Some people believe

he died while in prison.

But then other people believe he died in the '90s.

[Jack] There was news articles where people were,

like, adamant, they're like, "No,

Nel-Nelson Mandela is dead."

And everyone was like, "No, he's still alive."

And like people lost their

[bleep] minds over this thing.

- Ah. - [Jack] Okay.

Is it Sex and The City or Sex in the City?

Sex and The City.

Sex and The City.

I used to call it Sex in the City.

[Jack] But that's the thing, a lot of people did.

- Yeah. - That was like

the common thing and it's Sex and The City, yeah.

- [Sharon] Yeah. - [Ozzy] Is she [bleep] nuts?

[Jack] All right. Let's try this one.

- C-3PO. - [Ozzy] Ball lightning.

[Jack] Okay. So a lot of people

don't realize that one of C-3PO's legs

is silver but, like, C-3PO's, like, limbs

often change because in, like, Star Wars Canon,

it, like... He'd get replacement parts.

So it's kind of...

And he wouldn't always have a silver leg

- but C-3PO did... - All about the media.

[Jack] I'm not giving up yet.

Mandela Effect is a real thing.

- Get us some spooky old... - [Jack] All right.

ball lightning up now.

[Jack] Okay. The Queen song,

- "We Are The Champions." - [Sharon] Mmm-hmm.

Everyone thinks the recorded version's end,

it says, "♪ We are the champions ♪"

everyone thinks the last line...

- Of the world? - [Jack] Yes.

Of them all.

It just says, "We are the champions,"

- and then it doesn't... - [Sharon] Oh.

[Jack] But everyone sings it...

- [Sharon] Yeah. - "of the world."

And then the song end.

No, no, not real...

Not really in the lyric.

So yeah, that's...

This is a very fast-track version

of the Mandela Effect

but yeah, it's a... It's a very strange phenomenon,

how you can meet a group of people

and they're entirely convinced,

"No, this is a thing."

And it turns out to be wrong.

Shouldn't you put that down.

It's just some, uh...

Sure.

People don't realize they're making a mistake

because they think it's not a mistake?

[Ozzy] It's just... It's just... It's just...

[Jack] I don't know.

[Ozzy] [bleep] ball lightning.

Come on, put some [bleep] done.

[Jack] All right. Fine. We're gonna...

- Ball lightning. - [Jack] Look you're talking,

you're chatty, I got you angry.

You can't be more angry if you don't [bleep]

put something else on.

What's your biggest fear?

- Fire. - [Jack] Fire? Okay.

My wife. No.

[Jack] A while ago when I asked you,

you said airplanes. We all...

I think we all agree that dying in a plane crash

- would be [bleep] horrible. - [Sharon] Don't even...

- Oh, yeah. - [Jack] Horrible, right?

So take a look at this video,

it was shot by a security guard

in Mexico City

in 2016

and it's a ghost on an empty airplane.

Ghost on an empty plane.

So he thought he's on an empty plane,

he's hearing voices, watch.

[Ozzy] Well, what the [bleep].

Where?

A shadow, like, pops his head out, look.

That would scare the [bleep] out of me.

- Watch. - Wouldn't scare me,

they wouldn't be on an empty [bleep] plane.

Look. See?

- Head popped out and then... - No, where?

he keeps going forward.

[Jack] Watch... In the middle... That.

- Oh, that? That? - [Ozzy] It's [bleep] all...

What do you think that is then?

[Ozzy] Where did you get... This is...

This is the way he moves the [bleep].

[Jack] So the shadow is actually not moving

with the flashlight, that's how we know

it's not a trick of light.

[Jack] Woogie Boogie on the haunted plane?

- Two. - [Jack] Two?

- Two. Really? Oh, that one... - Yeah.

Obviously, somebody sees an empty plane...

- Yeah, but it is the thing... - a good place to sleep.

But you would see a face,

like, because think about all that's...

- They're illuminated... - [Ozzy] It's a [bleep]

- Shadow... - [Jack] Shadow person.

or dark ball lightning.

[thunder rumbles]

It is neither ball nor lightning.

Hmm. Ghost lives, ball lightning.

[Jack] Well, I'd give... I'd give that one like a five.

- Let's just be though. - [Sharon] No way.

Then again, I am a professional ghost hunter.

[laughs]

[rock music playing]

[Jack] You know, this cartoon?

- [Ozzy] No. - [Jack] It's a classic

American cartoon most people call it

the Berenstein Bears.

How the [bleep] do I know?

[Jack] Mom, you remember this cartoon?

I don't remember this cartoon at all.

[Jack] Oh, [bleep]. This was a disaster.

Can we go on a break or something?

Ball lightning.

[thunder rumbles]

[Ozzy] Well, that's pretty cool.

That's a good one, right?

And that was Dave, I always saw that,

I'd go, "What the [bleep] was that?"

It's not ball lightning.

[Sharon] I'll [bleep] paint you in a minute, put it on.

[Ozzy] It's a [bleep] airplane.

[Jack] That is not an airplane.

[Sharon] Why is there a mermaid

in [bleep] Nashville?

[rock music playing]

Mom, do you... Would you like to tell

your Mexico airplane story since we're here?

This is a true horror story?

[Sharon] True horror story.

Ozzy doing his world tour,

starts in Mexico City.

So we got our private plane, beautiful plane,

and I had packed my purse

which has got my driver's license in,

and I just remembered going into Mexico

with a driver's license,

we land and I don't have a passport,

and they wouldn't let me in,

and they wouldn't let me off the plane

so I had to sit on the plane all night long.

[Jack] For 24 hours you were...

- Twenty-four hours. - On your own?

Well, no one else was there, it was just awful.

What did the British Embassy say when you called?

- See you. - [Jack] They were like,

- "Sorry." - They were like... [chuckles]

[Jack] All right. This clip comes to us,

out of Nottingham, England.

This was January 3rd, 2019.

It's a haunted museum in Nottingham

and apparently they have,

like, a bunch of vintage old artifacts

which are haunted. One of them

is an old Victorian hearse.

Watch this, right here.

[tense music playing]

[Ozzy] What?

Look, the handle goes shooting up

and comes back down.

Why, that's pretty cool.

- That's a good one, right? - Mmm-hmm.

[Ozzy] Yeah. It's actually interesting.

[Jack] Am I redeeming myself with this one?

[Ozzy] Well, you are. Maybe, that's a seven.

Give that one a seven on the Woogie Boogie?

- [Ozzy] Yeah. - [Jack] All right.

- Where are you at? - [Sharon] Ditto.

Two sevens?

- Yup. - [Ozzy] Whoo.

Okay. If you were to guess

an object would be haunted in the house

because you have a lot of antiques,

what object would you think would be haunted?

All right. That's a good one.

My head.

What would you think?

[Sharon] I suppose the two leather chairs upstairs...

- [Jack] Hmm. - where the piano is.

[Jack] Yeah. You know, I'd...

Only because we handed it to a psychic

but that piece

of the World Trade Center you have, remember?

- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - You handed it to the psychic

and she was like, "Whoa."

[Ozzy] It's witnessed a bad event.

- Yeah. - A lot of souls went up there.

It holds energy, it witnessed traumatic events.

[Ozzy] It was a part of a thing.

Like [bleep] yeah.

[Jack] Objects can hold energy,

if they witnessed something.

[Ozzy] I'm saying this was...

It's a hearse, it's from the last century

or whatever [bleep] it was from.

And that was Dave... I always saw that,

I'd go, "What the [bleep] was that?"

- Oh, absolutely. - I would do

more than raise a [bleep] eyebrow,

- put it that way. - [Jack] All right.

It's not ball lightning.

[Jack] It's not ball lightning?

My friend Tyler and I discussed this

at great lengths, okay.

Think about Los Angeles, right?

There's 13 million people that live in the county,

if you do the math of Los Angeles residents

that die annually, right?

It doesn't add up,

you would be seeing a funeral procession

every single day of the week

sometimes two or three times a day...

Two or three times a day.

Where the [bleep] are all the bodies?

Oh, can we change the [bleep]?

[Jack] But this is my point though

of, like, where are all the bodies?

And also too, if, uh, so say

if you say only 10% were getting buried,

that would mean, okay, what's 10% of...

Call a 150,000 people die in LA County a year,

our of 13 million.

Are you sure it's that hard?

[Jack] Let's just do a quick look.

[Ozzy] Oh, let's just get on with it.

[Jack] No, this is an interesting...

I wanna make this point because this is a...

-This is a strange conspiracy -[bleep]

- Go on. Go on. - [Jack] Hold on.

They should've been dead so it didn't matter, did they?

[Jack] Okay, 60,000.

Okay. So then if you take 60,000...

[Ozzy] But there's got to be a...

It's got to be more than five...

It's got to be a few [bleep] crima... crematoriums, I bet.

[Producer speaking]

Okay. So that's a 164 burials a day.

Say, conservatively,

only 50% get buried, that's 82,

you would see a funeral procession.

- Every day. - No, it's a pretty big place.

It's not one street [bleep].

I know but like as much as I drive around the city,

and you, think you're on the freeway

every day going to work,

when was the last time you saw a funeral procession

on any day of the week.

- No, I haven't. - What's this got to do

- with this [bleep]. - The [bleep]

I'm trying to make is where are all the bodies?

Dead. Next. Ball lightning.

Think about... Am I wrong?

Is this [bleep] weird theory?

[Producer speaking]

Right? Where are all the bodies?

[Ozzy] It's as if they've obviously

got a few [bleep] crematoriums.

- Shall we move on? - [Sharon] Yeah.

So this is... This is again...

- Nottingham. - in Nottingham, England.

It's a different museum

and they believe that the...

This figure that appeared

is the spirit of Queen Elizabeth I.

Queen Elizabeth?

There's no way she's still alive.

[Jack] Queen Elizabeth I.

- And... - [Ozzy] Wait, wait, wait.

Let me just ask one question quickly.

[Jack] Mmm-hmm.

Queen... Ghost of Queen Elizabeth...

What year are we looking at?

- When she was... She was... - This...

So this clip is from 2014 on Halloween.

When did she die?

She died... She...

It was Elizabeth I, so like, when?

[bleep] times. Like...

- Okay. Then she was old, yeah. - [Jack] Yeah.

- Okay. - Yeah. She was...

She was Henry VIII's daughter.

Remember the War of the Roses?

- I don't know. - [Jack] Queen of Scots.

- The sister. - [Jack] Yeah.

So it looks like a figure walking down the hallway.

Just kind of lingers there in the shadows.

What is [bleep] that?

[Jack] You see right here?

And then disappears.

Watch it... Watch it again.

I don't see the [bleep] the first time around.

So watch right here.

You see like a human-like figure just kind of appear.

[Ozzy] It's a shadow.

How did they say that's Queen Elizabeth?

- So this is my big... - I mean, somebody just...

This is my biggest complaint about this clip.

And it's often my biggest complaint

about when I do paranormal investigations.

If a historical figure ever...

- was in a place... - [Sharon] Took a piss there.

[Jack] Took a, like... Think about,

like, all the hotels you've been at,

all the venues you've been at.

Are they gonna say, like, when, you know,

when you die, "Oh, it's the ghost of Ozzy here."

It's, like, what the [bleep] evidence do you have

that that is Queen... I'm think...

I think this is great paranormal evidence

caught on camera.

But there is no evidence from this

that is Queen Elizabeth.

That's really not the main reason I was showing it.

I was showing it more for...

- [Ozzy] The shadow. - Yeah. Like this...

Like... Set aside that it's Queen...

Could be Queen Elizabeth or it's most likely not.

Focus on... Out of the darkness

appears this humanoid figure.

[Ozzy] Oh, yeah. I can see it.

[Sharon] But what kind of [bleep] room is this?

[Jack] It looks like a basement.

- Okay. - Looks like a loft to me.

[Jack] What do you think of that on the Woogie Boogie?

- Two. - [Jack] Two?

I'll give that a three.

[Jack] A three? Okay.

I don't know. If I saw the whole uncut footage,

might bump it up to a five

but I'm thinking three to... Three to four.

But I will concur with your statement,

that's not [bleep] Queen Elizabeth.

Why would she [bleep] haunt a random place?

Yeah, really.

[rock music playing]

[bleep] off, Ozzy.

Do you remember in Nottingham,

you were doing Nottingham City one time,

and you... Your voice went...

And you just said I can't go on.

It was just a warm up gig

and we went back to the hotel

and the entire crowd

was outside the hotel chanting, "Ozzy [bleep] off,"

because he wouldn't go and stay.

[Jack laughs]

- Come on. - That... That's a...

- That's a haunted experience. - [Sharon] It is.

What do you call that then?

[Jack] I don't know what that is.

I don't... I hate to say this again.

[bleep] ball lightning.

We need to start making t-shirts saying,

"It's Ball Lightning."

- [Ozzy] What the [bleep]? - [Sharon] [bleep].

Are you out of your...

[Ozzy] We had a funny build to those, I mean...

[rock music playing]

There's chocolate underneath though.

[Sharon] What did you say?

You didn't like the chocolate?

- No? - Ooh.

- Do you want something... - No.

One of them I'm eating?

- No? Okay. - Do you want...

- Do you want this? - No.

These nuts?

Shut up with the [bleep] nuts.

- Come on. - You sure you don't want

some of these?

So this clip comes to us

from Tlaxcala in Mexico.

October 22nd, 2020.

[Sharon] When you say the name of the town,

it sounds like a castanet.

- What? A cast... - [Ozzy] Tlax... Uh, what?

- Say it again. - [Jack] Tlaxcala.

[Sharon] That's castanet.

- [Jack] Okay. - Tlaxcala.

- All right, guys. - Tlaxcala.

Just so you know I've called the home

and they're waiting for you guys.

So we can go upstairs and [bleep] off

one bag of belongings.

It's all you're allowed

and the home is waiting.

- Yeah, right. - [Jack] They're very nice.

They'll give you some crocheting needles.

[gasps]

And paint, you get to paint.

I'll [bleep] paint you in a minute, put it on.

We had a funny build to those, I mean...

- [Jack] Look at this. - [Ozzy] What?

- [Jack] Look at those... - [Sharon] Looks like...

- [Jack] ...[bleep] lights. - [Sharon] ...fire flies.

- Fire flies? - [Ozzy] ball lightning.

A tornado of ball lightning perhaps.

- [Sharon] Moths. - Moths?

[Jack] That's pretty cool.

Okay. My one...

My first thought about this is,

"Oh, it isn't like lanterns.

Is there some kind of, like, light?"

But it... Look at the way that they're moving.

They're kind of, like, spiraling.

[Ozzy] [bleep] I don't...

I hate to say this again.

Some phenomenon, it's not an alien or anything.

- [Jack] I think this shows... - It's some electrical storm

- or some [bleep]. - I think this show

needs to start doing merchandise

and we need to start making t-shirts saying...

[Ozzy] "It's Ball Lightning."

What do you call that then?

[Jack] I would... I don't know what that is.

If I were to see that, I... My first inkling

would be, like, "What the [bleep] is that?"

And then I would go, I would start, like,

"All right. Are they drones?"

- It's moths. - [Jack] Are they...

- Moths? - [Ozzy] At about five thou...

Twenty thousand feet in the air.

What kind of... Is it Mothzilla?

Is it Mothra fighting Godzilla?

That's enough of that [bleep].

- [Jack] It's a UAP. - What's that?

[Jack] Unidentified Aero Phenomenon.

- [Ozzy] Right. It is... - Okay.

That's the only thing I can say.

[Ozzy] Ball lightning.

It's no lightning clouds.

It's a [bleep] clear sunset.

You know, it's some atmospherical,

electrical storm.

[Jack] Okay. Do you believe it's an authentic clip?

Well, I don't know.

[Jack] Does it look real to you?

[Sharon] It looks like fairies.

- [Jack] Fair... - [Sharon] Looks like fairies.

Look, they're all dancing in the air.

[Jack] Uh, what would you guys rate that

- on the Woogie Boogie Scale? - Five.

[Sharon] I don't think it's a Woogie Boogie Scale

because it looks like little fairies, or moths,

or something like that.

Fairies or moths. Okay.

Yeah, what would it be on the Fairy Scale then?

Oh, an eight.

Hmm, okay.

All right. This is a UFO fleet of Hawaii

and this was recorded, uh, October 24th, 2020.

Oh, in Kona.

You've been in Hawaii, right? Many times.

How clear is the sky?

Wonderful. When it's not... But when it rains.

But in large though, when it's clear out

you could see the whole Milky Way.

And so I think people that live on the island

would have a pretty decent understanding of, like,

what's normal in the sky at night and what's not?

There's four clips of this incident.

Um, and thousands of people witnessed this.

I remember actually when it happened,

and the internet was a buzz.

[woman] What is that?

[woman] Oh, my God. A video.

[woman] What is it?

[Ozzy] [bleep] airplane.

It's an airplane.

[Jack] Uh-uh.

[woman gasps]

[Ozzy] It looks like one thing.

The lights are... They're airplanes, Jack.

No. It's definitely not an airplane.

[woman] What is that?

[crowd chattering]

[Ozzy] Wow.

And you would think now if it was an airplane,

people's reaction wouldn't be, "What is that?"

like, you would've seen. And usually airplanes

have like, uh, a red and a blue light

or, you know, there's...

It looks like it's an airplane to me.

So, that was one clip and that was from Kona.

And the second one though,

they captured the same thing

- but flying over Honolulu. - [Ozzy] Honolulu.

[woman] Huh?

[man] I've never seen like this before.

[woman] What is that?

It's [bleep] airplane.

[Jack] That is... Are you saying a single airplane

or like a fleet of airplane.

Uh, no. It looks like something pretty [bleep] big,

whatever it is.

But, yeah, what size are we looking?

Like a massive or...

It's... I think it's pretty big.

You can almost see... You can almost see like a trail.

It's a size of an airplane.

[Jack] I think it's bigger.

- I think... It looks bigger. - [Ozzy] See the hangar?

[Jack] Look. And then here's the other one.

- This is, uh... - [Ozzy] Oahu.

[Jack] ...from, uh, Oahu.

Same thing.

It's a [bleep] airplane.

[Jack] That is not an airplane.

If... Maybe if an airplane is the size of an island.

[Ozzy] No, it looked... Look at the...

Look at the airplane hangar.

And then you can see...

[Jack] But that's like way up in the sky.

[Ozzy] Look.

See the [bleep] building.

It's a [bleep] airplane.

That is not an airplane.

[Ozzy] Well, I think it's an airplane.

Do you think it's an airplane, Mom?

- [Sharon] No. - What do you think it is?

Ball lightning.

It looks like half of a flying saucer.

[Jack] So, you think it's one single,

like one single object?

- Yeah. - [Jack] All right.

This angle is interesting.

So it's going through the clouds.

So it's high up in the air.

- [man] Oh, it's... - [Jack] Look at that.

[man] Whoa. Did you see that, Crystal?

- [Crystal] Yeah. - [man] Right there.

Where's it going?

We need... We need... We need David's

[bleep].

[Jack] We're kind of getting there.

So I thought this could have been

like a meteor shower,

like something breaking up in the atmosphere coming in.

[Ozzy] There's still lights going on. And obviously,

it's not a meteor shower, is it?

[indistinct chatter]

[man] David's 50x zoom, bro.

[Jack] Where's David with his 50x zoom?

- [Sharon laughs] What is it? - [Jack] [bleep] David, bro.

[Ozzy] What?

They... They're saying, "We need David

with his 50x zoom, needing like his big eyes,

he's obviously like a photographer

with the big lens.

All right. So you think it's like the military

- or the airplane? - It's something from...

It's an airplane of some sort.

[Jack] What do you think it is?

Do you think it's an alien?

Yup.

[Jack] Wow. Ladies and gentlemen,

we have a believer.

On the Woogie Boogie, what do you give it?

Seven.

[Jack] Whoo, I'll take that.

[rock music playing]

[Jack] Um, so what... Wait. We are...

We were in Roswell when you spoke to that guy, right?

Then the guy said, "No, there were thousands of UFOs."

Yeah. Roswell.

[Jack laughs]

[Ozzy] Well, [bleep] museum is also out of the [bleep]

So in his backyard.

I also get like... Jack is typing [bleep].

It was so okay. [laughs]

Uh, an alien with a patch on his eye.

- [laughs] - Shut up.

It's like... It's like a kid, seriously.

[Ozzy] They built this [bleep] museum

and it's all finished, he was like...

But he's only with a [bleep]

and someone said pub.

Never had a creepy experience, Mom?

[Sharon] [bleep] No. I never had.

What the [bleep] is that?

[Jack] They don't know.

[Ozzy] Ball lightning. That was when...

[rock music playing]

[producer speaking]

Um, who,

- I think dad could be. - What?

[Jack] Captain of the alien's spacecraft.

[Ozzy] Hey, guys.

[Producer speaking]

[Jack] One parent to go to out... I don't think

either one of them would go.

-No way -You couldn't pay them enough.

- [Sharon] No way. - [Jack] Okay.

Well, hold on a second.

What if they said we'll pay you $10,000,000.

- Not enough. - Twenty?

- To what? - To go out to space.

Yeah. Like, just go to the space station for a week.

- I would go there. - Must be joking.

[Ozzy] We go into the moon and just stay there.

[screams]

[Ozzy] It's a ball lightning,

this is [bleep] nuts.

All right. Well, uh, moving on.

Okay. This is dated 1964

in Queensland, Australia.

And it's a very strange anomaly

and you might have seen this picture before.

It's kinda well-known.

Apparently though, the photographer and his family

noticed there's something strange in the water.

It wasn't moving so they presumed it was dead.

As it got closer, the thing awakened,

opened its mouth,

causing the photographer to immediately start

to swim back to the boat.

When he got back to the boat,

the creature had disappeared.

What the [bleep] is that?

They don't know.

It's an oil.

[Jack] Oil?

Yeah, it's oil.

[Jack] You think?

It's a [bleep] oil.

[Jack] So the oil slick tried to eat him?

What?

[Jack] The oil slick tried to eat him.

You just think it's oil?

[Ozzy] It looks like oil to me.

Did you see that?

Yeah.

[Jack] All right [bleep] my life.

Woogie Boogie scale on the strange oil creature

in the water, give it to me.

What are you gonna give it?

Two.

[Jack] Two on the Woogie Boogie?

All right. Well, that one went down

like a Led Zeppelin.

[glass breaks]

Do you think mermaids are real?

No.

But you were a Bubble Guppy.

What?

[Jack] Bubble Guppies.

What's that mean?

That cartoon. Remember you did that,

like, kids' cartoon with like the mermaids.

- You're Bubble Guppy. - Next.

Well, if you believe mermaids aren't real.

Can you explain to me this mermaid body

found upon the beach in England?

[water bubbling]

[Jack] Uh, so this happened on Great Yarmouth Beach

in October of 2016.

[Ozzy] What the [bleep] is that?

I think that body must been washed up.

[Jack] But with fins?

[Sharon] Where is the fin?

[Jack] Look at the [bleep] flippers.

[Sharon] Oh.

[Jack] Weird, right?

[Jack] So, just more of a tease.

This is... This is me just kinda teasing,

this actually was done by, like, a special effects

makeup person as a joke.

- Okay. - [Sharon] Well,

I think he made a mistake

because she got a very short body.

It's a [bleep]...

- Yes, it is. - mermaid.

[Jack] Prepare to be amazed.

This is the infamous Nashville mermaid.

This was captured August 12, 2020.

Why is there a mermaid in [bleep] Nashville?

[Jack] Just watch this.

This will blow your mind.

[woman] I feel like I'm seeing like [bleep].

[bleep] and this better not gonna be what I think it is.

It's better not gonna be what I'm [bleep] think it is.

Somebody [bleep] around here.

[woman] It's a [bleep] mermaid.

It's a [bleep] mermaid.

I saw a [bleep] mermaid.

[Ozzy] I think somebody [bleep] around.

[woman] Okay. I'm seeing [bleep]

like, nobody noticed this [bleep] mermaid in the sea.

[Jack] In the sea

[bleep] she's in Nashville.

[Sharon] I love her.

[Jack] What [bleep] sea is in Nashville?

[woman] Nobody seeing nothing. People out there

just sitting and looking at them.

- [Jack] This... - [Ozzy] It's a hobby.

Yes, [bleep] it is a hobby. [laughs]

[woman] It's a [bleep] mermaid.

- It's not a mermaid. - Listen,

if it looks like a mermaid

and swims like a mermaid...

- It's a [bleep] mermaid. - It's a [bleep] mermaid.

Okay. Somebody [bleep] around.

[Jack] All right. For Comedy,

so on the Comedy scale, what is it?

[Sharon] Ten.

- Fifteen. - It's fantastic.

- All right. - It's absolutely fantastic.

[Ozzy] Well, I'll go give the mermaid one

and the commentator 15.

[Jack] All right.

Do you think by her reaction

that she legitimately thinks it's a mermaid?

[Sharon] Oh, God, yes. She's fantastic.

It's a [bleep] mermaid. It's a [bleep] mermaid.

I love this woman.

All right. Well, [bleep] that's my...

That's my aquatic adventure for you guys.

You've been really a crap this week, Jack.

I'm gonna do the... I'm gonna do the classic,

uh, political thing. And say,

oh, that [bleep] was an aid that [bleep] up,

um, yup. My aid had them.

Your producer.

[Jack] Yeah, my producer [bleep] up.

- I blame the producer. - [Sharon] Absolutely.

They had my Twitter. They had my Twitter account.

[Jack] Watch the back in that circle.

What are you [bleep] sure?

Watch right here where my little pointer is.

- He's a what? - A career ghost.

- A career ghost. - [laughs]

Have you ever had a creepy experience in church?

All right. Little behind the scenes action.

How's it going, gang?

- Good. - Yeah?

How are we feeling?

Tickety-boo.

Shakety-boo. What the [bleep].

No, tickety-boo.

Tickety-boo. What the [bleep] is that?

How long have you been away from England?

Tickety-boo? What the [bleep] is tickety-boo?

Tickety-boo?

What's that?

It's means you're all right.

Okay.

Are you all right?

Clearly not.

All right. Have you ever had

a creepy experience in church?

- [laughing] - [Sharon coughs]

- Yes, I may have... - You did not.

Never had a creepy experience in church, Mom?

[Sharon] No. I never had.

[Jack] Did you go to church often as a child?

Uh, yeah, but I was always giggling.

[Jack] So this happened in Chester, South Carolina,

October 2020.

So these guys were investigating

a haunted church when this happened.

[man] Did you use to play piano here?

[Jack] Watch the back in that circle.

- Look at that. Poop. - [Ozzy] What?

You [bleep] someone comes leaning out

- and then goes back in. - There's nobody leaning out.

[Jack] Look, right here. Look, right there.

That was clear as a [bleep] day.

What are you [bleep] sure?

Watch right here where my little pointer is.

Someone leans out now and back in.

What the [bleep]?

[Sharon] But, hey Jack. There's nothing there.

[Jack] Watch close-up replay.

There it is. Watch.

And leaning out now.

Look, that's ball lightning.

You can see that.

It's the same [bleep] on the earlier one.

[laughs]

- On the plane. - [Jack] He just flew here.

[Sharon] It's the same ghost from the plane.

[Jack] He got off the plane from Mexico,

went right to the haunted church.

[Ozzy] He's a [bleep] career, uh, ghost.

- He's a what? - A career ghost.

- A career ghost. - [laughter]

He goes where the opportunity is.

He looks for the advertisement and drop...

Drops you the paper.

In the church now he goes.

[Jack] He's like yeah, so I just left Mexico.

Oh, I see a paranormal investigator team

that's in the South Carolina.

[Sharon] Here we go. And it just stood there.

So Woogie Boogie, what do you give it, Mom?

- Three. - [Jack] Three?

Well, I would give that a six.

He said you wanna play again

so it with playing the organ or something?

He's like, "Do you wanna play the piano again?"

[Jack] Maybe the ghost... Maybe they... They thought

the ghost was someone who played the organ there.

Um, do you think church is a place that could be haunted?

- Yes. - No.

[laughs]

Touche.

[Jack] Uh, my per... My personal opinion...

Um, so if I was doing a paranormal investigation

and I captured that footage [bleep]

pack your [bleep] guys, we're going home.

We got a great episode.

Like, uh, only the ghost,

only the best ghosts come out to me.

Making ghosts great again.

Oh, my God.

We didn't make those [bleep] hats.

[indistinct chatter]

Making ghosts great again.

It's like... It's like a, uh...

[Ozzy] What the [bleep] thing on this?

Man returns from the grave.

[Sharon] Oh, my God.

I only have the best examples of paranormal,

only the best.

Do you guys have like a weird hack like that?

Like, if one of you dies first, like...

Or like a thought in bed with you or something?

No, no, no.

Oh, Mom is looking at you.

[producer speaking]

Uh, probably my mom.

There's no... There's no seeing the kids

without giving them a gift.

[producer speaking]

- When I come back... - Jack is.

Dad is a pretty good cook when he cooks.

Dad is a good chef.

When we got a stove that works.

[chuckles]

[producer speaking]

This guy.

Where?

What the [bleep] is that?

I can't see a [bleep] thing.

What the [bleep] are you looking at?

What are you [bleep] sure?

[Jack] Um, all right. So, this photo comes out

of Norfolk, England in 1975.

- Um, Peter Berthlock. - [Ozzy] Norfolk?

- [Jack] Norfolk. - It's Nor [bleep] good.

[laughing]

Peter Berthlock took this photos

of his wife Diane sitting in the pew

in Worstead Church in Norfolk, England in 1975.

When they had the film developed, they noticed

the ghost sitting in the pew behind Diane.

According to the members of the church,

this is not the first time

the lady in white has appeared.

In fact, there was a report of someone

seeing her as early as 1830.

So this guy thought he was just taking a picture

of his wife all alone

and then this mysterious lady in white is in the picture.

It's like, uh... It's like, uh... It's like a camera

with glitches in it.

It's still Nor [bleep] good.

[Jack laughs]

Well, uh, do you...

Do you believe?

Woogie Boogie scale?

Two.

It's old crap this week,

- [Sharon] Come on, Jack. - I only have

the best examples of paranormal,

only the best.

And that's not true.

You liked the haunted house and Mom,

you liked the UFO in Hawaii, hula-hula.

Well, that's pretty cool.

I'll give that a seven.

[Jack] Do you think it's an alien?

Yup.

Seven.

[Jack] Whoo, I'll take that.

All right. And here's another.

Man returns from the grave.

This is grandpa.

Denise Russell took a photo of her grandma

who lived alone at the time.

On the 17th of August 1997,

no one noticed the male figure standing

over her until Christmas day of 2000.

Um, the Russell family says it's a spitting image

of their grandfather who died in 1984.

It could be a person walking it.

- [Jack] but they were outside. - It's outside.

I mean it could have just been a random guy

that kind of, looked like him walking past.

I'll give that. But no one remembers

anyone being stood behind her when they took the photo.

Do you guys have a weird like, um...

Do you know Harry Houdini said that when he died,

he told his wife do sounds and I'll come back to you.

And so she became obsessed with sounds as after he died.

She would hold them like regularly.

Do you guys have like a weird like hack like that?

Like, if one of you dies first, like...

I'll write my name in the mirror

or like a thought in bed with you or something?

No, no, no.

Oh, Mom is looking at you.

- What? - We should.

[Jack] You should. You should have something.

- What for? - [Jack] Like, a thing.

Okay.

I'm trying to think what my thing would be is.

I would like...

I want my bear.

[Jack] I would just do [bleep] things with bear.

You know, he's come walking across the bed.

- Or, like, dancing. - [Jack] Yeah.

All right. So Woogie Boogie scale,

what do you give it?

- Four. - [Jack] Four?

- Mom? - Six.

[Jack] All right, guys.

Jack, this one just wasn't meaty enough,

- was it? - [Jack] Meaty?

Now, you guys want meat?

These clips, uh, may have fooled the Internet

but there's no fooling these two folks right here.

They're a little bit weak.

Weak, weak, weak.

Weak.

Really, Jack?

Thanks for tuning in, folks.

[rock music playing]

[Ozzy] Until next time, folks.

We stuck it out.

[man] Welcome to the Osbourne crazy train.

[Jack] You've been in Hawaii, right?

- [Jack] Many times, right? - [Sharon] Oh, in Kona.

- [Jack] In Kona. - [Ozzy] Come on, put some

[bleep] aren't you done?

[Jack] What do you think it is?

[Ozzy] It's a [bleep] airplane.

- [Jack] Another plane? - [Sharon] Looks like fairies.

Look, they're all dancing in the air.

[Jack] If it looks like a mermaid

and swims like mermaid...

[Jack and Sharon] It's a [bleep] mermaid.