Original subtitles

Hey, munchkin.

Hey! Oh.

You're surfing.

What do you think?

I thought you had a meeting or something.

I do. Going to it right now.

I thought I'd clear my head before that.

Well, must be nice to be you.

Anyway, please don't be late tonight.

We've got a lot to do for the party.

A lot to talk about.

You know what I mean.

Yep. Copy that.

I'll be back on time, munchkin.

I got to go.

I love you so much.

And I can't wait to see my hot wife in that black dress and those pearls.

Oh, good.

Please don't be late.

I should be home between 5 or 530.

I've got that open house this afternoon,

but I'll be coming straight home after that. My.

Come on, say it.

Babe, I hate that word.

And Vanessa's right here, looking at me.

Munchkin.

Happy?

There you go.

Okay, love, I got to go.

I don't want to be late.

Boss.

Zox industries.

Got it.

Gotta go!

Sorry, hot tip on a stock.

Hey!

You're late.

Yeah. The beach is packed!

Right there, baby.

Right there.

Mr. Scholarzzi.

Nice of you to show your face, John.

I'm impressed with your punctuality.

Where I'm from, that means disrespect.

I'm sorry, Mr. Scholarzzi.

Hey hey hey hey hey,

baby.

Make him one of your nice.

Mai Tais.

This shit is impossible.

Here.

I can do it.

Hey. What's up, Johnny?

Hey, T.

What's up? Man?

Here. Have at it, hotshot.

Are you ready for me again, baby?

Just smell the air, boys.

Gotta love those negative ions.

I didn't expect anything less, Mr.

Scholarzi.

This is top notch.

How's your drink, John?

Best Mai Tai I ever had.

An exotic drink for an exotic guy.

Only the best for my business associates.

Anyway,

do you guys know the story of this cube?

My nephew gave me that shit.

Told me... I could impress the ladies with it.

I told him, kid, you out of your mind?

He said, “Uncle Al

I got a kiss because of this cube,

Yeah, right.

Anyway, he said that he was in one of his classes

in the school, and this little girl saw him playing with it.

Turning and twisting and lining all the colors together.

And how impressed she was.

And pretty much.

Out of nowhere.

She just walked up to him and gave him a kiss

a peck.

Right here on his cheek.

And you know what the son of a bitch told me later,

“Uncle Al.

The rest is history.”

Funny kid.

So I told him, let me see that thing.

Maybe I can't get laid too right?

Right.

But this shit's so goddamn hard

that if I have to figure it out,

I'll die a fucking virgin.

Hey!

So I came up with a joke.

You guys want to hear it?

What's that?

What does a Rubik's Cube

and a penis have in common?

Tyler?

Indulge me.

The more you play with it,

the harder it gets.

Hey, sexy.

Who would you rather fuck the funny guy

or the nerdy guy?

Always the funny guy?

Grazie.

Bellissima.

You see, Tyler,

the funny guy, always wins.

What the fuck?!

Mr. Scholarzzi. About your money.

This is supposed to be the greatest deal on earth.

3,000 mil in. 6,000 mil out.

But this

Tyler guy here screwed everything up.

I had nothing to do with it.

He's supposed to be some kind of financial genius, according to Zeke,

but it turned out to be a little bit of a gamble.

🎵Johnny boy.

Johnny boy, what have they been feeding you?

Johnny boy. Johnny boy.

It's not your fault. 🎵.

You see, it's not my fault.

Not at all, Mr. Schorlarzzi.

I'm glad you see that too.

Enlighten me, Johnny boy?

What was your guys plan here?

You two “Putzes” thought you were going to stiff me

to take my motherfucking money and run.

No, no, no. Mr. Scholarzzi. Absolutely not.

No, it's right “Patzo”.

Where's my fucking money.

Not on me.

Not yet.

Tonight, Johnny boy.

By midnight.

But... yeah.

Yeah. No problem.

I prefer yes as an answer.

Yes. Yes.

Absolutely.

Good boy.

Mr. Scholarzzi.

Maybe I bounce.

I will take care of you.

I will cherish you.

I will protect you.

You will never know want.

You will never know lack.

You will only know joy.

Ryan.

Ryan.

Ryan.

You're a million miles away.

I'm just thinking about the party.

Ten years.

Something to celebrate.

I just want it to be...

Perfect.

Yeah, like my life.

It will be fine.

You know, we were originally just going to do something casual,

like barbecue turkey burgers, tofu dogs for Moira.

Pasta salad with beans.

Margaritas...

The four food groups.

But it's our 10th anniversary and that's a big deal.

So John convinced me we needed to do something... special.

Special?!

You know, more grown up.

Grown up.

Copy that!

And there's a lot of work for you.

It's mostly handled.

And it's only our closest friends who are coming.

I just.

You thought about my offer? Let's keep that private-tape private!

You've got a ton of stuff to do.

Why don't you go on and get out of here?

I've got that open house this afternoon.

Are you sure?

I'm sure.

You've been totally useless all day.

I'm sorry I've been running late ever since I dropped Connor off

at his grandmother's.

Breathe.

That's your party.

Try to enjoy It.

It'll be fine.

I still wish you'd come back.

You know I hate talking to people.

Unless there is a commission in it for me.

You just don't like John.

It's not

John I dislike.

As much as his cash mortgage deals

he's making.

They make the feds nervous.

You're just jealous.

Uhmm

all right.

I'll see you on Monday.

But wait.

Oh!

Happy Anniversary, sweetie.

Oh. Thank you so much, honey.

This place is the best couples treatments.

Enjoy.

Bye bye.

Hi, it's Ryan Craddle.

I'm going to be by a little bit early to pick up the flowers.

Are they ready?

The church didn't go through.

I must be giving you the wrong card.

Sorry about that.

I'll straighten it out when I get there.

It's John.

Leave a message.

Baby, It's me.

Can you call me back when you get a chance?

Love you.

And? See you at the party tonite!

How come you never call me, “Munchikin”?!

You know. I prefer “babe,” myself.

Come on.

Okay, I'll call you babe. And you call me.

Oh, jeez. Okay, babe.

Alright, Munchkin.

John.

Baby.

Baby.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh oh,

Whore!!

Stop it! Oh!

Oh! Oh, Jesus! Oh!

Oh! Oh, Jesus! Oh!

I'm sorry.

Ryan.

Please listen.

Please John jump me, okay?

He said, you're not coming til late. And he.

He asked me to come help him set up surprise for you.

Congratulations.

I am very surprised.

Oh my God, Ryan, I don't really know what to say.

I'm so sorry. Okay.

I always admired you, and I always wanted to be like you.

I'm sorry, but I would never cheat with a friend's husband.

I even got Tofu for you. And in my bed?

Ohhh!

John.

John.

Honey? Come on.

Munchkin.

Come on.

Come on.

What am I gonna do without you?

Come on, you bastard! Come on!

What am I going to do with Connor?

John?

Hello.

I'm coming... one sec.

Hello.

Hello.

Mrs. Craddle?!

Hello.

Yes.

I'm Anna. Carter. Are you organizer?

Oh. Of course.

Sorry, Anna.

It's just a kind of a madhouse around here.

Well, I'm here now, so nothing to worry about.

Oh, just show me where to set up.

I can get out of your hair.

Oh, just, Just.

Follow on through to the kitchen.

Oh, that.

We were having a little Séance last night.

Yeah.

You know where some summon the dead

eccentric?

You have children?

A little boy, Connor.

Is he at home?

Oh, no. He's with his grandmother.

Yeah.

I always hated it

when my mom would parade me around grown up parties, so I figured I'd spare him.

I bet your mom.

I thought there would be two of you.

Oh, my associate, he's picking up the artisan cheeses.

I guess I'll start setting up.

Oh, okay.

The pantry is right here.

If you can't find something, just text me.

But, if you'll excuse me, I do have to go get dressed.

There are three guests arriving any minute now.

Sure. Don't worry about a thing.

You know, before I forget,

my husband forgot to pick up the expensive wine for the party,

so we're going to have to serve a lesser vintage tonight.

So, I'm going to need you to transfer the wine

in the fridge into those bottles over there before you serve them.

New wine in old bottles.

Gotcha!

Good. Our friends are such snobs.

You look perfect.

Go get dressed.

Do we really have to go to this thing?

Yes. You paid $1,000, a ticket and.

Money well spent for the...

Doctor without borders.

Right. Those guys.

Well, you know, they've already got the money.

It will be a good networking opportunity for you.

Zeke's bringing this venture capitalist guy.

He knows... he's looking for a house.

Is that what he's calling his connections these days?

Maybe you can finally unload that eyesore in Carmel Valley,

Do you think you could sell it any faster?

I know Vanessa could.

There you go.

I knew you'd bring KGB to amp up your game.

I'm working a couple of hot prospects, babe.

This Tyler guy who seeks connection introduced me to this foreign dude.

Some wannabe Italian idiot, clueless with more money than taste.

Foreign huh?! Impressive.

Yeah.

He may just be the one to appreciate that

classic example of mid-century architecture,

with the eclectic addition

of gothic and “Bauhs” elements.

Yes, because Gothic and “Bauhaus” go so well together.

That's how you. Say it,

You know, babe, if this thing really is too awful, we can pretend that Connor's

baby sitter texted us and he's throwing up and running a fever.

My angel.

Oh, my baby husband.

I see I'm unfashionably early.

Well, now that you're here, the party is officially started.

Toby, you.

I'm glad you're the first one here.

You can play host till John arrives.

John, it's not here.

No. Poor sweety. He's... stuck at the office, closing a deal.

Oh, then you promised me he'd be here before the cake is served, so...

Cake, hummm...

You look astonishing! Jesus.

Thanks, honey.

Lovely.

Oh. Where's Moira?

Moira's father is kinda ill,

but she said she'll be here a little later tonight.

Nothing to worry about. Yeah.

Well we can have you all to ourselves for a few hours, huh?!

Yeah. That sounds like fun.

Do you remember that?

Ohhh! That is you ten years ago.

And you haven't aged a...

Seriously?

You're not in a Ben Affleck movie.

Could you recognize me?

No. I actually thought you were a Ben Affleck.

Anyway.

Connor isn't here.

They sent him to his grandmother.

Wait, what?

No way.

You were sure his ass would be here?

Well... He's not. Deal with it.

We need to get an address.

And address the money.

And the fucking kid.

That's who the hell knows where..

What's that?

The safe.

No, no.

Hell, no.

We never get the safe. Easy stuff.

Easy money. That's it.

Look. It's fine. Don't worry about it.

I got it under control.

Just trust me, all right?

I think you're watching too many goddamn movies, baby.

How the fuck do you want to break into the safe?

Assuming that we could even find him. This is fucked up.

I don't. Know yet.

Okay, but we'll figure something out.

Don't be such a pussy.

Just get down to business.

I have to wear this.

Yes.

Oh, this is so fucking gay!!

Oh, look, the part.

Are you high?

Nah! Just some nerves.

You know.

You need to take your mind off of it.

Oh, okay.

Okay, okay, I got it. I got it, got it.

Hang on...

Transfer the wine

from those bottles in the fridge into those.

What this one?

Oh, the cheap stuff in the fridge.

Okay.

Seriously?

And when you're done.

With that, you gotta go blown up the balloons.

What the.

What is this? A kid's party without a kid?

It won't take that long. There's one of those helium machines up at the backyard.

All right.

Better get to it.

The guests will be arriving soon.

We have the living room to organize.

Hey, was there a piano last time I was over here?

Oh, yeah, we sold it.

We thought it'd make the move easier.

Bitch!

But I love her.

I think you're aging backwards, honey.

Oh. You're so sweet.

I wish Moira would be more like you.

But her head only thinks about dollar signs.

She's good at spending it.

Why is it a for sale sign in the front of your lawn?

Oh, John was offered this wonderful

opportunity in Dubai managing this international

real estate company for Sheikh Abdula... ra ra... something.

I know... they're gonna love you Dubai.

Wow!

You know, we literally need to sell this place like yesterday.

I mean, literally, we needed the money for this beautiful home in Dubai yesterday.

And I know that you and Moira always said

that if we ever sold the place, you'd be interested, right Honey?

Mara always wanted this place because you had it.

She's always wanted everything you had!

The house, the car...

The husband.

Wow.

She didn't know what she had.

You know, you think she would have learned over the years?

She's got the best out of the deal.

We're headed towards “Splitsville”.

Oh, no. I'm sorry to hear that.

Lasted longer than I thought.

I love your house, baby.

But with the new Lambo, the yacht,

I'm gonna have to hold off on the expenses.

And Moira too.

Anyway,

if we split, she has to find some other sucker to support her shoe fettish.

You... and John, are lucky.

One second.

It's me again.

I've got bad news for you.

John and Ryan are leaving the country sooner than I thought.

Ring me! Bitch?

You got this.

🎵 🎶 🎼

Hey, what's up girls?

So John will be here later.

Uhmm... You see Moira anywhere?

Oh, Tobey says she's out of town on a business trip.

Business? Is that what she calls it?

Oh. This is rank.

How could you drink this swill?!

Booze is Booze, and I'm in the mood to get boozed up!

Is Dean acting up again?

Again?

More like always.

Poor thing.

His latest boyfriend showed up at the house the other night.

Dean said it was some intern delivering some papers.

That's ballsy, but Dean is looking devastatingly young.

I don't know how he does it.

It was our anniversary the other night, you know.

No...

Dean gave me a little garnet

and a silver bracelet.

Nice. Jewelry.

The intern...

He was wearing a “Tag Heuer Monaco.”

You tell me what an intern can afford.

A $3,000 watch.

I don't think so.

It's getting out of control...

They went into his office and locked the door.

I remember when Zeke and I used to have sex in his office.

We never locked the door.

He loved the idea of somebody walking in on us.

I missed.

Those days?

Having sex.

He promised to love me in sickness and in health.

But no one ever says what happens when you...

I'm past my sell date.

No! You're not.

“Sex on the Beach”.

Keep them coming, baby.

Do you ever think about divorcing Dean?

Prenup.

Ironclad

Zeke, wrote it up!

Well, then you're screwed.

I wish that, literally.

Babe.

I bought one of those Japanese Sex Dolls!

You didn't...

I did...

The best few thousand dollars I've ever spent.

How does it feel?

How does any toy feel like?

Sometimes when I'm mad at Dean, I... punish him!

Dean?

The doll!

How?

You know...

I strangle him,

burn him with cigarets.

Sometimes... I cut him.

I don't know you smoke

just after sex.

You don't know what it's like.

No, my husband isn't disgusted by all women.

Just me.

Enjoy a little bit. Will ya?

God has been talking to me, Nick.

What?

What? What's he talking about...

Shut the fuck up!

I'm all right.

You wanna party?

Nah. I'm ok.

Baby, come.

Relax.

Baby., come?!

Baby...

Come. Relax.

I'll entertain you.

What's wrong with him?

Is he gay or something?

Hey, fucker!

Did you hear me?

At least play something decent, old man.

Boss?! Hey?!

What's the matter?

Come on.

I got you some good variety here.

Just like you enjoy it.

Wrap it up.

We got business to attend.

But “Padrone”, the girls?

I'm getting my money tonight.

One way or another.

Capiche?

Go inside.

Oh, hey.

Hot stuff. How's it going?

How's “SunRay”?

You know... have a few leads... working hard.

The brains, and the real boss of the family.

I'm going for a smoke.

I'm gonna go grab something to eat.

What are you doing, Megan?

Relax! Wiil you?

This is a gift I give her, so it's okay.

Last few times I was there, I noticed her bad tablecloth taste.

So... I got her a new finer one.

Help me out here.

We don't have all day, babe.

Okay...

Okay. Okay...

So Zeke's looking good.

Well, I mean, it's wonderful what going to the gym every day.

Will do for you.

Every day?

Almost...

I swear he's taking whatever Dean's taking.

Come to think of it, I bet you John is taking, too.

Yeah. Come on.

Take this ugly rag off the table.

What the hell are you guys doing?

Sorry, I, I mean, this was my mother's,

and she gave it to us on our wedding, so I thought I'd put it out today.

I don't know, I thought it might...

Might give us good luck.

Anyways, I'd

you know, ten years.

Something to celebrate, right?

I love your taste, honey.

I promise I'll put it out as soon as the party's over.

It's... beautiful.

It's ok...

I hope this ritual can save your marriage.

Sorry, Ry.

No. It's fine.

It's just that it means a lot to me.

That's all.

Did you get it?

I got it. So I got these two.

Atta, boy! Good job.

What are those?

Nah!

Well, you'll live.

So tell me about these domestic red wines.

The domestic red wine.

You know, a bottle of this grape juice sold at auction for 500 grand.

This little bottle might go for 100.150 grand.

Wow...

And, where'd you get these wines?

Believe it or not, in the same room where we have our guests.

It's dark and cold.

Perfect for the wine.

What's the point of keeping them...

If you're never going to drink them.

Want to know what a half $1 million bottle of wine tastes like?

Oh, shit. You're crazy.

Is this what eccentric people do... let's celebrate.

It's fine.

Okay, we'll be out of here soon.

Oh, God.

Okay.

That taste like liquid ass!

What the fuck?

Now focus. Okay.

We need to find that safe.

Excuse me.

Yeah.

You wouldn't happen

to have any smoked oyster, tomato bites, or...

I didn't have dinner, and I'm starving.

Yeah, sure.

Uhm... this onion chutney is amazing.

Thank you.

Have you thought of opening up a restaurant?

Yeah, actually,

I would cook, and then my son would run the business when he gets older.

Family businesses are good.

You interested in investing in one?

No. God, no.

Restaurants are the worst investment ever.

Even if the chef has a big name.

Stocks could tell you that.

You know,

John wanted to have the wedding in Hawaii,

but he couldn't fit it on his credit card.

Our boy has come a long way since then.

Yes... He owes a lot to you.

Where's Connor?

How's he doing?

He's with my mother.

Hum...

Ever think about adopting another kid?

Yeah, a little brother.

Little sister for Connor would be great.

You know,

kids tie families together, but..

You know that as the wise

woman that you are.

You know, I haven't really thought about it.

And John doens't really like the competition.

You know?

I guess

Connor likes to be the only child in the house,

Ohhh... so forward.

I like that.

So John tells me,

you guys have an interesting real estate deal in the works.

Well... yeah...

I just put people together and see what happens.

Just wait to see what happens.

Yeah.

So I hear you're selling the house.

Yes. Thanks to you.

I might be interested in taking it off

your hands.

I'll have to gut it, though.

But if the price is right.

You know, we did a lot of renovations when we first moved in here.

It shows...

But if the price is right.

Hey!

I've never been given the grand tour?!

Why don't you show me around?

“Ma Maison est ta Maison!”

Oh... Francois.

She sells herself too easily.

Zeke's just playing with her.

And he only plays to win.

You know, she's desperate to sell the house, right?

Well, that giant for sale sign out in front of the house.

I didn't even know she was selling it.

My son of a bitch husband didn't tell me a single thing.

I overheard Dean talking

to his intern boyfriend, saying that he wants this house

to be a new rendezvous place to hide from me.

Well, if we bought this place cheap.

We could fix it up and sell it for lots of money.

We?!

I mean, we could be partners.

I mean, if we flip this place, we can make a couple of mil.

And that's not chump change.

It could be your ticket to leaving, Dean.

What would Zeke think?

What?

Zeke's eyes don't see.

His heart doesn't feel. Screw him!

Besides, he's got a safe in the basement behind the water bottles.

That he thinks I don't know about.

Really?

Can you get to that money?

Her deadline is tonite.

With the right magic touch on this view.

People will eat it up.

Think about it.

We have a few hours to make a decision.

Well, can we smoke this joint so I can clear my mind?

Save it for later.

Let's drink another cocktail to celebrate.

Okay.

Oh, wow.

You guys must have had a wild anniversary party.

These sheets look like they got a lot of stains.

Yeah, it's, it's a big room.

You'd have this in the playroom to do whatever you want with.

If you buy it.

You can throw your orgies or swing parties,

Satanic rituals, whatever floats your boat.

What's your asking price, Ryan?

3 million.

What?

I'm taking a loss here, and you know it.

What's going on here, sexy?

John's gambling debts catching up to him.

You're an unbelievable asshole. I...

You were the one that made him into

the sure thing that the feds were all over.

And you're calling him a gambler?

Come on.

That's that! Let's go back downstairs.

Hey!

Come back here.

The upside was huge.

Besides, John likes to run the fast lane.

He knew the risks.

You guys would be sitting on millions of dollars right now.

So how much do you really need?

I need the full three mil.

That's how much he owes.

Well. Won't you persuade me will be worth my while?

You're disgusting.

Where is that player, anyway?

I got some anniversary cash for him.

What?

Don't give me that look.

Some of our old cash deals.

So... what? He skipped town,

leave you holding the bag?

Don't go in there.

The bathroom's a mess.

Remember, you used to have a great tub...

Come on, let's get down to the party.

No, no. Yes. No, don't worry about it.

Plenty of room for two in the shower. Come on!

Come on, asshole! I don't want people to start talking about me.

Did you install those sexy massage machines?

Oh. I like my man with a clean shave!

Oh, my God, make him look so much younger.

I know I do look younger now.

Zeke?!

Zeke?!

Zeke?!

Zeke?!

Is Zeke in there?

Oh, No! No. He's not here.

What do you mean? He came up here with you?

Oh, I know I was showing him around, but then he left.

And, I thought he was downstairs already.

Bulshit!

Why are you in your underwear?

Zeke in there.

Oh, no. God, no no, no, I just.

I'm on a period, okay?!

I gotta come up here and change my dress.

Okay. I'm sorry. I thought I saw him come up here.

And maybe he went back down.

I just didn't see him.

Yeah. I think so...

All right... All right! Come on. Let's smoke some weed.

Come on.

Come on.

Do you want to dance?

Yeah.

Dance. It's party after all.

Come on!

Come on, Dean?! You can do better than that!

Fuck yeah!

John?!

207

Do you copy?

207

Come in.

This is 207.

We got another call about the Craddle's house up the street.

Apparently, there's a lot of noise coming from there.

Don't you know these people?

What's going on in there?

It's just a couple on the wedding anniversary.

Nothing to worry about.

Well, go check them out.

Instead of the girlfriends on your phone.

10-4

You can just leave that right there.

The garbage is full.

I think it's time to bring out the desserts.

With Dean's?

Nice dress.

Are you okay, honey?

What's wrong?

PMS post marriage syndrome.

Oh, I love your take on that.

Sylvia, I told you why I changed my dress.

If you're worried about me and Zeke, you should know that I wouldn't

go near him with a ten foot pole.

And you know that.

Well, the thing is, we do.

When we need money, right?

How dare you?

Hey! That's enough.

Sylvia. Don't be nasty with your comments.

It's our wedding anniversary for God's sake!

Give it a break.

You're right.

I was way out of line.

Besides, I'd probably just be watching TV and eating all day.

Even if it was my 50th anniversary.

It's fine. I can handle it.

It's just... everything else.

Well, come on, let's, let's enjoy the party

to Ryan and John's 10th year anniversary.

My hell.

Wait'll you've been married 15 years.

You missed that child bride.

We got married the day after my 18th birthday.

Why?

I was pregnant.

With Dean's?

No. Remember Travis Coleman?

I remember Travis Coleman.

He worked at the San Pascal wine tasting room, and he never quoted as he was.

Cuuuuute.

Yes, he was.

What happened to the baby?

I didn't know I was pregnant

until it was too late to do anything about it.

I was in denial. All right.

So Dean needed a

beard, and I needed a cover.

A couple months after she was born, I gave her to adoption.

Zeke, help me out with it.

I'm forever thankful.

Well, I guess he's all right sometimes.

I'm so sorry, honey.

I had no idea about the baby.

How? It's probably for the best.

Imagine me being a mother, making grilled

cheese sandwiches and tomato soup.

Changing diapers with these hands.

No way.

Want some more, honey?

Sure.

Honey.

What now?

The devil left me to go to a business meeting.

Bastard!

You can't compliment a weasel.

It's like a curse.

You know what this party really needs?

Asthma medicine?

No! Weed!

Oh, come on, Sylvia, you shouldn't even be smoking.

You know it's legal now, right?

I know, it's just John hates it when I smoke.

Well, John is not here.

Still smoking anything is dumb. Come on?

Well, they're always edibles.

They just kind of seem like empty calories, you know?

Ry!

You used to be a lot more fun.

I am trying not to set a bad example for Connor.

He's probably already smoking.

He's seven.

Oh my God.

Outside.

All right.

Ok, let's go out.

Hey. Anniversary girl.

C'me here, babe.

Oh. Hey...

Oh, God.

Congratulations.

How have you been?

I'm good.

So, anyway, I was going to tell you.

I need to move some money around.

Considering that your friend's husband just screwed me over with the yacht.

But I think I could take this place off your hands.

There are six bedrooms.

And a garage.

The naughty room.

That's the most important thing.

When I moved in here, I wouldn't touch a finger in that room.

And that's where I'll be spending majority of my time.

I know John's got secrets.

Come on, take me.

I want to see all the rooms.

Oh, my God, it's such a mess right now.

I don't care.

Come on.

Oh my God, Ryan.

You bought new things.

This cage... those wips... Disneyland for adults.

Endless possibilities. Baby.

And this machine.

I can't wait to use this.

I know Freddy can't wait too.

Oh. Is Freddy, your intern?

Oh, wait. How did you.

Oh, that bitch!

Have you been to the bunny cave?

No, not yet, but we'd love to see your love nest.

Come on, take me to your bunny cave.

Ryan?!

Oh, Oh, wait!!!

Oh my God!

Ryan, why didn't you tell me

you had another sexy room?

You know, you're one bad bitch.

Here, hold this for me.

You know, I am definitely buying this place for you now, Ryan.

Wow!

Marble.

Hey, Megan.

I need room service.

Hot dragon.

Shit.

Hey, Dean. I wanted to ask you.

You know that painting in the bedroom?

Or me and John are naked.

Did you move that off the wall at any point?

No, I did not.

But I sure will get rid of that damn thing.

Shit.

Honey, are you okay?

I was just thinking, if it wasn't you.

Then...

What?

It had to have been John.

And that means he was in the safe.

And he's just been involved in some really shady dealings lately, I don't know.

Hey,

you don't have to worry about him being in charge of everything

around here anymore.

Especially not of this sale.

I'm going to take this place out of your hands.

Really?

Do you really?

Oh my God. Oh my God, thank you.

You saved us.

Oh my God, thank you.

Thank you so much.

Ryan, I have a wife.

Oh. Okay, baby.

Watch my husband for me.

I've had a lot to drink.

I'm about to take a piss.

Oh, wait wait wait.

Ryan, I gotta go.

Just just means I can sit down.

What? I'm.

Before you go in there, I.

I need to tell you something.

Earlier this evening,

I was giving Zeke the grand tour of the place, and

we were in the bedroom, and it was just.

It was being really predatory, and,

we were in the bathroom and the razor

was just on the sink, and I,

You what?

I killed him.

Oh, God.

Ryan, are you sure he's dead?

Yeah.

Oh, my God, Ryan, why did you tell me?

I don't know.

Why did you tell me?

Fucking God.

You know that? You're my friend, right?

I love you, okay, baby.

You know that you can trust me, right?

Okay.

Trust, Dean. Okay.

I'm going to get you help. Okay?

I love you, babe. Okay.

And I need you to trust me right now.

Thank you.

You know, I'm here for you. Okay?

I know!

Okay... you need to trust me on this.

Okay?

Dean?

Dean?!

911.

What's the.

Emergency?

Babe?

Anyone there?

Hello?

Dean?

Ohhhhh!

What the heck!!!

No more killings, Nick.

I promise.

Hello.

You must be Ryan.

Joel has told us a lot about you.

I'm Nick.

This is Mr. Scholarzzi.

Call me Alfonzo.

I don't think she was expecting us, Nick.

Isn't that just like John?

Sorry to burst in on you like this, Mrs.

Craddle.

John's not here right now.

Nice house.

It's okay.

We can get to know each other at the meantime.

Here!

This is for you.

Happy anniversary.

I hope you have many more.

I'll just go put this over with the other gifts.

Nah! Nah! Nah!

You need to open it.

That'd be rude.

Trust me.

You want to open it?

Oh, it's a lovely frame, Alfonzo.

And thank you.

Look at the picture.

He's a good looking kid.

Nick took that picture.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

You don't have to do this.

We're trying to get you the money.

There is no try, honey.

Only do.

He's just a little boy.

That's an insurance policy, you know.

Make sure John just won't run off to Costa Rica or something.

Don't act so surprised.

He's always been talking about Costa Rica this, Costa Rica that.

Ever since I met him.

And he made me an offer.

I couldn't refuse.

All right.

We'll make ourselves home.

Gotta grab'em while they're hot.

Just like my stocks.

I'm into stocks, too.

Oh, yeah. What do you do?

Real estate.

Oh, just like Ryan, and

John.

What do you hear about Zox Industries?

Oh that's a hot one I see.

I see the birds have been singing.

But as you Americans say can't spill the beans like that.

Listen, you scratch my back, I scratch yours.

Understand?

Okay, okay.

We all have our ways.

You didn't hear from me, okay.

But their CEO...

The poor bastards got stage four pancreatic cancer.

Thanks for the.

Tip on Zox Industries.

I hope the fucker dies.

Have you seen Ryan?

I think she was feeling a little bit undisposed and went to the restroom.

Okay.

Thank you.

Hey, Nick.

Let's go.

Let's go smoke some weed!

Moira?

Where the hell are you?

I'm divorcing your bloody ass.

Oh, fuck.

Wait. What?

What are you doin?

Ryan?!

We're leaving.

Happy anniversary, baby!

Bye!!!

Where the fuck were you?

Chill out.

These motherfuckers are everywhere.

I had to hide, and I had to jump from the second floor

and wait for the neighbor to disappear, to chill the fuck out.

Did you get the money?

Liam, did.

You get the fucking money? Oh.

They killed somebody.

All right. I saw the body.

He had this huge scar on his neck.

Like when they cut a chicken's neck for some voodoo shit.

These motherfuckers are crazy.

We should have got out when we could have been to stay for a stupid ass safe.

No! Okay? We got the code.

We're not leaving without what's in that safe!

What the fuck did you get that?

That crazy bitch.

She came in here and dumped it in the trash bin.

When I was getting rid of our garbage goods.

I'm telling you, they're part

of some kind of cult or voodoo shit or something.

Fuck.

Fuck! Fuck.

Fuck.

What?

Okay. When I first came in, that bitch was.

Talking about.

Séances and invoking the dead.

Oh my God.

Connor was in the house with her.

Do you think that she.

Oh, my God, my baby.

My poor baby.

God.

I was thinking that maybe.

What? Spit it out.

I mean, maybe they're part of one of these crazy rings of millionaires

that take children sweat when they're scared and drinking.

You know, like a

a formula to stay young.

The fountain of youth type of shit.

What?

Yeah. That,

That.

“Adrenachrome” shit.

Oh, my God.

Oh my God.

Baby, my poor baby!

Hey, Romeo and Juliet.

Any more of those cheesy bite things?

Yeah, sure.

Just give me a second.

Fratello?

You have no manners.

Hey, why are you crying, boo?!

Yo, what did you do to her?

Do you want me to warm up?

You could warm me up?!

Alright! Dude?

What the fuck?!

Oh! The fuck looks like that guy Tyler.

We just fucked up.

Damn, that was his twin brother. Oh.

For a minute, I thought I was seeing a ghost,

but it could be his twin brother.

What did you just say, Tyler?

The fuck do you mean?

Was his twin brother?

Was! He's dead!

“Muerto”.

Nice try.

I was just with Tyler yesterday.

Tyler was his name all right.

Smart kid., and all.

Right?

But I think he had a needle problem.

Oh, he's so mad.

Give him the Italian chill pill, Nick!

Oh, shit.

The fuck?

Your brother was just business.

Come on, Nick, show me some of the Brazilian jiu jitsu shit.

C'mon... cap his ass, Alfonzo!

You know I can't, man! AI promise is a fucking promise!

Fuck!!!

No! No! No. No...

Come on.

Come on.

Nick!

“Vai en pace, Fratello.”

“Patzo”! Just like his twin brother.

Have you ever met his twin?

No, I haven't.

He was a “Stronzo”.

So he was better than anybody else.

Look, you're

gonna need a mop and some bleach.

Usually Nick does this for me, but.

You look like a smart girl.

Plus, I have a feeling you're not here

for the catering business, right?

So be smart.

Finish whatever business you got going on here.

Clean this mess up and get the hell out of here.

Capiche?

Yes,

Here!

All right.

Oh my God!

Fuck! Open!

Who are you calling, honey?!

We need to call the cops.

Dean's dead.

Who's dead.

I saw Dean's body floating over the pool.

It's okay, it's okay.

Come here. Sit. Sit down. Catch your breath.

We need to call the cops.

Dean is dead.

And whoever killed him could still be in the house.

No. It's okay.

It's okay.

Sylvia, I have a question for you.

Did you know that.

Zeek took Connor from a desperate mother when he was a.

Newborn and sold him to us?

Did you have anything to do with that?

I can explain.

And did you also know that it was your beloved husband that introduced John

to that Alfonzo fella that you've been flirting with all night?

And he threatened to kill Connor if we didn't have his money by tonight.

Alfonzo? I didn't know.

Clearly!

Zeke he said.

He was to kill John. Only.

Oh, John is a wanted man tonight, isn't he?

We need to call the cops.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

There's some extra air, honey.

What the fuck!

Are you gonna jump with your clothes on?

Sure.

I'm sure, You look great all natural.

Here! Toss it?!

I'm hungry.

Wait,

wait.

There's a dead girl in your bathroom.

And, gosh,

Sylvia?

I mean, she could have been the one.

You know.

Wanna tell me what's going on?

How many more of your friends you and your douche bag husband

are gonna kill before getting me my money, huh?

I mean, I don't see that many left.

Where's that asshole anyway?

Ryan?

Late for his own wedding anniversary party.

Look,

my blood sugar is really low right now.

Just let me go into the kitchen, make myself a sandwich,

and then I'll call John and ask where he is.

Maybe he ditched you already, And who knows?

Bounced overseas, right?

In this case, this will be technically your last meal.

You're waiting for anybody?

Mrs. Craddle?

Yes. May I help you?

I hope I'm not catching you at a bad moment.

No. It's fine.

I'm just celebrating my 10th anniversary.

But it's fine.

Oh, I'm so sorry to bother you, but

we got a call from your neighbor reporting, seeing some strange things.

Plus a loud noise.

And Marty's wive's?

Yes. Yes. No, I.

I know all about Marty's marital problems.

He's my brother in law. So...

Now, if you'll excuse me.

Keep the noise down.

I don't want to have to come back here.

And thanks.

Mrs. Craddle.

And happy anniversary.

Your husband is a lucky man.

Do you mind?

Maybe I'm in the mood to eat something, too, you know?

That weed that your friend Sylvia had was really potent.

Or, maybe I'm in the mood for something else.

No, please.

Call fucking John.

Now!

It's right there. It's right there

it's John.

Leave a message.

Jo..., John.

John, where are you? You have to come back right now!

We need you here right now.

Yeah.

John, come back!

Oh, no!

Please, Alfonzo! No!

Please stop.

Or maybe I'm in the mood for other shit, huh?!

No, no, no! Please?

Call it interested for being late with my payment!, honey!

Stop! Stop!

Please stop! Nooooo!!!

I guess I have to do the honors myself.

Since, John is not here.

No, no no, no.

Help! Somebody help!

You finally have to leave this place,

What the fuck?

Ryan?!

Magdalene?!

I can...

Oh my God!

What... the hell!

I can explain.

Take it easy, all right!

I didn't know what to do! They said, they'd likk Connor if I didn't have the money here tonight.

This.

This is an insurance policy.

Insurance policy?

This is my sister.

Sister?

Where am I?

You're at my house. Magdalene.

Your sister. Ryan?

Do you know how to get back to your place from here?

Yeah, sure.

I can't let that happen.

Please? She suffers from dementia.

She's just not even gonna remember any of this.

Please.

Come on.

Get out of here!

Back to our little business, John.

Where's my fucking money?

Since your kidnaping attempt failed miserably,

all your fucking friends are dead

and you didn't sell your goddamn house.

It's here in the safe.

I swear to God, it's in the safe.

We think I want this whole time.

I got it from Zeke.

He screwed a lot of people over, me included.

I had to kill him.

Take all the money from his safe and bring it here.

That's why I'm so late.

That's bullshit. Man.

I swear to God, Alfonzo.

Nah!

No way.

You gambled all my fucking money with that asshole.

In that real estate deal, I know it!

I swear to you, man, I have all your fucking money.

The whole 3 million right here, right now.

Nah!

Here!

Right from the fucking safe.

Have a good night, Johnny boy.

Whoa, wait, wait.

You know, Zeke marks his stack.

Check it.

Help me out here, Ryan?

He's telling the truth, Alfonzo. You know, he does.

I'm gonna dig into your bullshit, man.

Let's go.

Let's go see it.

Let's go.

Shit!

All you assholes have safes?

Maybe I ought a start a new business, huh?

That's it!

Wait, wait.!

If you get em wrong, you gotta start from the beginning.

Ryan?

Help?!

Those are my panties in your mouth, Alfie.

How do you like my taste now?

Oh. Oh.

You know,

I've had a lot of fun with this little gadget.

It's both fast and furious.

John?!

So we can start you at low or high?

Which one would you prefer?

John?! Please?!

Help!!! Please?!

I think “Hi, John.”

John?! Please?!

Sorry, Alfie.

Nothing I can do.

Give you money!

Give you fucking money!

Who's the “Stronzo” now?

Oh, I'm sorry, Alfie.

I think we just ran out of lube.

Ohhhh! Ohhh! Ohhhhh!!!!

Ohhhh! Ohhh! Ohhhhh!!!!

Well, happy anniversary, honey.

Costa Rica just got real.

I'm hungry.

You're not going to talk to me?

Hi, this is Ryan Craddle on Montecito Drive.

Yeah. Can I make an order?

Can I get fried dumplings with extra sweet and sour sauce?

Two orders of General Tso's chicken.

Double order of brown rice, hot dry string beans,

two egg rolls and extra almond cookies.

Yeah, half an hour's fine.

Thanks.

That's a lot of carbs.

How are we to clean this mess up, Ryan?

Everyone's dead.

You're laughing.

I had to cover my tracks.

If you know what I mean.

They were all accidents.

Except Megan.

Jesus.

You shot Megan.

She wouldn't stop asking about Dean.

We wrestle in the bathroom, and her stupid gun fell out of a person.

I shot her.

This is a mess.

You know, she was just like you.

Just some sleazy bitch who thought she could low ball me

and threaten me with an old sex tape.

A sex tape?

Yeah, at Dean's office.

Apparently, they had cameras.

With whom? With.

How could you do this to me?

Oh, you are such an angel.

You know, it's interesting.

Sometimes you can be married to someone for five, ten, 15 years

and never really know who they are.

Enlighten me, John?!

How are you still alive?

It's going to take a little bit more voltage to kill me.

Happy anniversary, “Manchikin”.

Connor, please be careful.

Wait right there.

Grandma I'll be right back.

Hi.

Hi.

Who are you?

I'm. I'm Anna.

You're... you're auntie?

Auntie, Anna...

Okay.

Who's that for?

Oh, for you, baby.

You like gifts?

Wow! A gun?!

So cool!

Thanks., Auntie Anna.

So how's your life, baby?

Does your mommy treat you good?

She doesn't make you scared

or beat you or anything like that?

Does she make you go to parties with adults?

Make you drink things

that tastes really nasty and make you really tired or sleepy?

No. Why?! My mom is so boring.

Auntie, Anna.

She doesn't even let me skate to school.

Why are you crying, Auntie Anna?

Oh.

I'm not...

I got something in my eye.

Don't cry. Someone's hurting you

I'll shoot them.

Pa! Pa! Pa!

Do good in school.

Okay?

It's really important to become someone important.

Make lots of money.

Like my dad?

Yeah, like your dad.

No. More than your dad. Maybe like your grandma.

Don't eat too many sweets.

It's not good for you.

Auntie Anna will be coming around a lot more often.

Okay?

Okay.

Auntie Anna has to go now.

Be good.

Okay.

And when you're a lot older,

I'll teach you how to shoot a real gun.

Come here.

Bye, Auntie Anna.

Ok, Connor.

We're going to go see mommy.

Okay.

Put on your seat belt.

Keep everyone back.

Keep'em back. Please?

This house again.

Hey, Jake.

I got something to show you.

Hey?

You got this!

Look.

Johnny's the cult leader and fled the scene.

You escaped with minor scratches.

Everyone else died as victims of his doings.

Stick to the story, and we'll be fine.

How are you holding up, Mrs. Craddle?

I'm okay.

And your sister?

Yeah, she's all right.

She's just resting inside.

Some kind of mess we got here, huh?

I've never seen anything like this.

All the deaths... we got-throat slit.

Blunt force trauma, gunshot,

heart attack, gunshot.

And the only thing they have in common

is that symbol right there.

So eight dead bodies.

The number eight?

I'm willing to bet it's an infinity sign.

Heaven's gate.

Kind of like a cult. Yeah. Most definitely.

This is some kind of ritual.

Religious homicide.

Oh, look at this guy here.

Anally perforated over and over.

Jesus.

Yeah.

There she is.

Mommy.

Oh. Hi, baby.

I missed you.

Hi, mommy. I missed you, too.

Hi. Auntie, Vanessa.

Oh, honey.

Mommy, look what I got. Oh, my.

Oh, my...

Grandma has been spoiling you, I see. Don't blame me.

I thought you gave him that gun.

No, mommy. It was a nice lady.

Her name was Anna. She was crying.

Who?

Said she teach me how to shoot a real gun when I'm older.

So what... no sign of your, I guess, ex-husband.

And they... don't know where he is.

I'll go check.

Okay.

We'll be out front.

Okay.

The leader.

The husband? Apparently.

Well, like with all the other officers.

She never expected anything.

I guess he decided to take a different route. All by himself.

We think he' s

a cult leader.

Apparently, his... his wife.

Ryan... was supposed to be

the last one to be killed.

And to be.

Placed is a central piece in the circle.

Oh, how do you know that?

Well, she told me.

Like psycho told her.

Well.

She's okay.

She's.

She's lucky to be alive.

Well, whatever you guys do, don't leave town.

This is going to be a long investigation.

You guys almost done here?

No. Not even close.

Are there any more bodies inside?

Yeah.

We've got a dead Carter.

So, where are you taking the cater's body?

We're taking this one outside with the rest.

Okay.

Oh, Connor.

Come on?

Get back!

You know what?

I am feeling like some ice cream.

What do you say we go get some.

Vanilla ice cream.

Sounds really yummy to me.

I want peanut butter, Mommy.

Okay. Peanut butter, it is.

For. Those.