Original subtitles

(BELLS TOLLING)

LAWRENCE: Good morning, Mr. Roarke.

ROARKE: Good morning, Lawrence.

Stop.

Hello, Roarke.

Hello, Naya.

Are you surprised to see me?

Oh, yes, Naya, very surprised.

What brings you back to Fantasy Island

after all these years?

I'm 1,000 years old, Roarke.

I'm tired of being immortal.

I'm tired of falling in love with sailors,

I'm tired of luring them to their deaths.

I'm bored, Roarke!

And my fantasy is to end it all.

I want out.

ROARKE: Oh, Naya, Naya, I can't possibly

grant you such a fantasy.

NAYA: You have to. You're the only one who knows

-how to end immortality. -ROARKE: No.

Roarke... Please...

Help me die.

Naya, the answer is no.

How dare you refuse the wish of the most royal princess

of the seven seas and daughter of Neptune!

You'll regret this, Roarke,

I promise you.

Fantasy Island will never be the same

when I'm through with it.

I don't believe it. Huh.

Smiles, everyone! Smiles!

(TROPICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

LAWRENCE: Mitchell Robinson.

He's every bit the efficient banker,

but why does he look so furtive, sir?

Because until recently, Mr. Robinson was quite happy

and secure in his job.

Now, suddenly, he finds himself facing

a very early retirement.

-Retirement? -Yes.

LAWRENCE: But he's such a young man.

ROARKE: I know.

LAWRENCE: What possible reason

could his employer have

for wanting him to retire?

Progress, Lawrence. Progress.

You see, Mr. Robinson may soon be replaced

by a computer.

Since his work gives purpose and meaning to his life,

the threatened loss of his job

has made him feel obsolete.

ROARKE: His fantasy is to feel a purpose in life once more.

To feel a whole man again.

My dear guest, I am Mr. Roarke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island!

WOMAN: The XB 500 can perform many banking functions.

So let me show you just a few of them.

It will receive and credit deposits.

Well, take a good look, Laura, that's the competition.

Cold, calculating, heartless.

It is quite imposing.

I don't blame Mr. Robinson for being intimidated.

Ms. Hunt is determined to sell the computer

to these members of the banking community.

Including Mr. Clifton Forbes, who owns the company

that Mr. Robinson works for.

HUNT: Now, over here, we have a portion of the computer...

Excuse me... Which we will unveil tomorrow night.

This module can perform even more sophisticated tasks.

Uh, with Mr. Roarke's cooperation,

I have arranged for the XP 500

to handle all of the banking needs

of his guests this weekend.

And tomorrow night, with the help of Mr. Robinson,

I would like to demonstrate how the XP 500 computer

can perform all the same functions he does

as assistant loan manager at Pinnacle Savings.

Don't worry, Mitch, no machine could ever replace you.

Better take another look at Mr. Forbes.

HUNT: The XP 500 excels as no human loan manager...

I think I've already been replaced.

Mitch? Mitch?

Mitch.

Mitch, look, I know this was a bit of a surprise,

but why not cooperate?

That's like asking the condemned man

to dig his own grave.

You could work with the computer.

You have more information about Pinnacle's clients

than we could ever compile.

Suppose I don't want to?

Why fight progress? Why not join it?

There could be a place for a man of your talents.

As a matter of fact, why don't we discuss your future

at Pinnacle over dinner tonight?

My bungalow?

Aw, thanks, but no thanks.

You know what they say. Three's a crowd.

Three?

You, me, and the computer.

ROARKE: You seem unusually preoccupied today, Lawrence.

No doubt just overworked, sir.

I seem to be suffering from a mild...

Hallucinatory symptom.

You, Lawrence?

NAYA: Roarke, darling.

I came to see if you've changed your mind

about my fantasy.

As you can see, I've learned to trade my beautiful tail

for these awkward legs you mortals insist on wearing.

Yes, apparently you've learned a great deal

about magic, Naya.

But still very little about unselfishness

or good manners.

Now, Roarke, I promised myself

to be above common anger.

No matter how justified.

LAWRENCE: Excuse me, sir.

Yes, Lawrence?

If you don't mind, sir, I'll be off

to re-plan the dinner menu.

I'm changing the entree.

I had planned on...

Fish.

Fish! Fish!

Now, Naya, now, no.

Father Neptune, your royal daughter asks

that you teach a lesson to he who has just insulted her.

I warn you, Naya...

-NAYA: Now! -(LAWRENCE CRIES OUT)

It seems I've been struck by a wave, sir.

Um, no doubt an isolated thunder shower, Lawrence.

Now, why don't you put that minnow in the pond

and change into some dry clothes?

Yes, sir.

What does one do with a 1,000-year-old child?

Give her her fantasy, Roarke.

And she will first give you ecstasy

beyond imagination.

Well?

I'm sorry, Naya.

When I kissed you, you felt nothing?

Oh, I felt a great deal.

I felt a deep green sea closing about me,

and the cold tentacles of seaweed

pulling me down into dark, icy depths.

If you were the gentleman you pretend to be, Roarke,

you'd forget about my past!

Naya, Naya, why don't you go back to the sea.

Go back to your own realm and be content.

Content? You mean bored, bored, bored!

You refuse my fantasy again?

Then that does it.

Now you're really in for it!

ROBINSON: Where's Mr. Roarke?

LAWRENCE: Sir... Wait a minute, sir.

Just one minute, sir.

It's all right, Lawrence. It's all right.

Something troubling you, Mr. Robinson?

I came here to get away from that, that thing

that's trying to take over my job, and now it's here.

-The computer is here! -Yes.

But you haven't been replaced yet.

And your stay on Fantasy Island has just begun.

Mr. Roarke, if I lose my job, I may not be able

to afford to stay on Fantasy Island.

And now it looks like I'm gonna have to cozy up

to that machine and Charlene Hunt

in order to keep it.

A man's life adds up to more

than the sum of the tasks he performs.

But I really like my work, and I've helped people, too.

Yes, and you have a loyal and very able assistant

in Ms. Martin.

Why don't you, as they say,

put your head together with hers, Mr. Robinson,

at once?

Why didn't I think of that?

Yeah...

Put our heads together.

(WOLF WHISTLE)

Whoa, I think you need protection here, beautiful.

Don't be ridiculous.

Beautiful? Are you attracted to me?

Well, let's put it this way, if you had a hoop,

I'd jump through it, you know what I mean?

Hoop? I have no time for stupid games.

I am Naya, princess of the seven seas.

Yeah, well, I'm Sam, your alternative to the average jock.

I like your style, princess.

Good. Then it's settled.

You and I will become lovers.

Well, your place or mine?

Mine, of course.

-Oh. -I'm sorry.

I've been around a while, you know,

but I have never met a woman like you before.

(CHUCKLES) Of course not, or you wouldn't still be here.

Oh? Is that a promise or a threat?

Kiss me.

Are you ready for love?

Yes, princess of the seven seas.

Then follow me into the waters of paradise.

Follow me, my love.

Yes.

Help!

Laura, we gotta do something about Charlene Hunt.

She has big plans, and I want to be prepared

for whatever curve she throws me.

Yeah, like 36-24-36.

Oh, I can handle a pass from Charlene Hunt.

It's the computer that worries me.

That's why I need your help.

I'm all yours.

Oh, I knew I could count on you.

-You've always been so... -Steadfast.

-And loyal. -And dull.

Laura, you're special to me.

Working with you, being with your every day,

well, it's been terrific.

Really, Mitch?

'Cause I feel the same way.

For a long time now, working for you has been

more than just a job to me.

That's 'cause we're so good together, you and me.

And maybe...

Maybe together we can just beat this thing, what do you think?

(SIGHS)

Okay.

Let's go to it.

There is no way I can thank you enough, Mr. McCall,

for saving a man's life on my island.

I just happened to be closest

when the guy went under, Mr. Roarke.

Ah, you're too modest.

What puzzles me is,

what happened to the beautiful lady, I mean, one minute

she was there, the next minute she was gone.

I was afraid she drowned.

Oh, I feel there is small chance of that, Mr. McCall.

A very small chance.

I'm sure the lady will turn up.

Well, I appreciate your nice words Mr. Roarke,

but I'm leaving today, so...

Uh... Your fantasy, if I recall correctly,

was to go back to the sea and dive once more.

Yeah... I've spent most of my life

on the sea or under it.

Diving professionally off ships,

like Costeau's.

I had an accident, nearly died from a case of the bends.

And to deep dive again would mean your death.

That's it.

I know you can't perform the kind of miracle I need,

Mr. Roarke.

No wonder you stalled me off.

Delay your departure one more day,

Mr. McCall, and don't give up hope.

Not quite yet.

Please excuse me.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

How did you know I'd be here, Roarke?

Oh, it wasn't too difficult.

This happens to be our only unoccupied bungalow.

Are you angry?

That you tried to drown one of my guests?

Angry? No.

No, why should I be angry?

I wasn't really going to let him drown, Roarke.

That was to teach you a lesson.

I'd have saved him myself if that silly mortal

hadn't interfered.

Of course.

What are you going to do?

Face reality, I suppose.

Face up to the fact that your regal powers

are simply beyond my ability to control.

After all, you are Naya,

daughter of Neptune,

princess of the salty realm.

That is true.

And so I've decided to help you after all.

You mean...

You're going to give me my fantasy?

I promise to help you to the utmost of my ability.

Oh, Roarke, I knew you'd see it my way.

And I... And I promise,

no more tricks on your guests.

Thank you. Thank you so much.

Um, you agree, of course,

that my decision is irrevocable.

Of course.

Imagine... No more boredom,

no more sailors, no nothing.

Just... The end of Naya.

Peace.

Something wrong?

Do I have time to go down to the sea

to say farewell before...

You know, before it happens?

I believe I can spare you enough time for that.

Yes.

Thank you, Roarke.

I think.

Until later, Naya.

Until later.

(SOBBING)

For tonight's demonstration,

I'll need Mr. Robinson's help

or, at least, his cooperation.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'll show you

how to cut expenses and increase efficiency.

Well, if you deliver on that, you've got my vote.

Thank you.

Now, I have here some loan applications.

Let's start with Mr. O.B. Rockhold,

who wants $20,000

to expand his cabinet-making business.

I have a copy, Ms. Martin,

and I have already processed it,

uh, without any errors, I might add.

Oh, well, then you won't mind the XP 500

double-checking it.

Not at all.

I can assure you, Ms. Martin and I have

processed this thoroughly, and, well, I happen

to know Mr. Rockhold, he's a fine gentlemen.

We've done business in the past.

It seems our Mr. Robinson has the queen in check.

Not so fast.

Ms. Hunt has yet to make her move.

Ah, the XP 500 has rejected

the application which you approved.

On what basis?

On the basis of the data.

Six months ago, Mr. Rockhold missed

a series of house payments

and was almost foreclosed. It's all here.

His daughter underwent an operation,

and... Well,

he extended credit to a friend who was in trouble.

Nevertheless... This credit history

makes him a bad risk, and the XP 500...

The tables have turned.

Now our friend, Mr. Robinson, is in check.

And in trouble.

I can assure you that Mr. Rockhold is

a dependable, reliable, hard-working man.

Mr. Forbes,

banking is a business of dollars and cents,

and that's all the computer cares about.

And, furthermore, ladies and gentlemen,

it won't ask for raises or demand more vacation time

or bring its personal problems to the office.

(SCATTERED LAUGHTER)

Very good.

I'm afraid that's check and mate.

If that's what you want...

Yes, I mean... Mr. Roarke!

Excuse me.

Mr. McCall, you've become quite a hero on the island.

Yes, your daring rescue is on every lip, sir,

particularly female lips.

Oh, speaking of females,

that's why I wanted to speak to you, Mr. Roarke.

Did you ever find out who that fantastic woman is?

The one who was with the man I pulled out.

Fantastic is the word.

Oh, you mean Naya, yes.

She's an old...

Old acquaintance of mine.

I know this may sound stupid, but...

There's something very special about her.

I can't seem to get her out of my mind.

Do you think you could arrange for me to meet her?

Oh, you wouldn't want to do that, sir.

-Why not? -Because she's a...

She has a very bad temper

among her other negative qualities.

I'm sure Mr. McCall appreciates

your sincere concern for his happiness, Lawrence,

but I am also sure you have other duties

to attend to... Now.

Yes, sir. Good day, sir.

As you have already discerned,

Naya is a female

of unusual and striking personality.

-(CRASH) -Ah!

As a matter of fact, I happen to know

that Naya is, at this very moment,

strolling along the beach which you will find

if you follow that pathway over there.

I think you'll find she loves the sea

as much as you do.

In any case, I'm sure a man of your character

will have no difficulty introducing himself.

I think I can handle that. Thank you, Mr. Roarke.

You're very welcome.

(ALARM BUZZING)

(MUFFLED BUZZING)

Let me go!

Naya?

I'm Duke McCall.

Oh, yes.

The man who rescues mortals in distress.

I understand we share a common love.

What could that possibly be, Duke McCall?

The sea.

What do you know of the sea?

I've been a deep-sea diver all my life.

I've spent more time under the water than I have on the land.

I've explored the drowned cities of the Caribbean,

set depth records in the Mindanao Trench...

Swam with the manatees off Florida.

I've done it all.

Have you seen the canyons of the Atlantic floor?

I helped map them.

And the swirling waters of the Dardanelles?

Naya, when I was young and reckless,

-I swam them. -So did I.

All these places, I too have been many times.

You must be one heck of a swimmer.

Oh, the very best, of course.

You know, there... There aren't many of us

that know the magic world under those waves out there.

Which may be all for the good.

Because, to come to that moment

when you know you'll...

Never see it again,

that moment seems so very, very special.

You know that feeling?

Hey, I... I'm sorry to be such a downer.

Kiss me, Duke McCall.

No! I won't have it again.

Anyway, it's too late.

Naya...

Naya, come back.

I... I don't get it, Mr. Roarke,

trying to destroy the computer?

Why would Laura pull a stunt like that?

-Good shot. -Thank you.

How well do you know Ms. Martin?

Oh, we've worked closely for the past three years,

and you get to know a person working side by side,

day after day.

So you're more than just coworkers.

I guess you can say we're friends,

yes, if that's what you're getting at.

You are surprised by her behavior

because you know her to be...

A conscientious, trustworthy employee

who would never commit such an irrational act

to merely save her own job.

Exactly.

But what if she acted not to protect herself...

But out of respect and loyalty

for someone she cares deeply about?

Someone who himself

is threatened by that computer.

Are you saying she did it for me?

Out of love for you, yes.

Thank you, Mr. Roarke.

I've got some business to attend to.

Some very personal business.

Yes, sir.

How dare you undo my magic?

I need those disgusting things you call legs,

and I refuse to be wheeled about like an infant.

When you promise to stop soaking Lawrence

with your petulant waves,

then I may consider restoring your legs.

That's not fair.

Roarke...

You know I have only a few hours left,

perhaps only a few minutes.

And then Naya...

Princess of the seven seas,

will be no more.

You'll be sorry you made her last moments so unhappy.

Oh, bravo, Naya, bravo.

Oh, what an actress you would have made.

I command you obey my orders.

Give me legs.

Enjoy yourself, Mr. Smith.

Hmm... You see, I can still cause you

plenty of trouble.

Where are you taking me?

Oh, I thought you might enjoy one last look

at the beauty of Fantasy Island.

As an invalid? Oh, Roarke.

Roarke...

-Get me out of here. -Why?

-Ahh, Mr. McCall. -Mr. Roarke.

Naya. What happened?

-Well, you see... -Well, I...

I twisted my ankle.

Yes.

It must be more serious than that.

I... I mean, the wheelchair.

Well, it's...

It's a sprain,

but I was feeling a little faint,

and Mr. Roarke insisted.

Yes, that much is certainly correct.

Well, I'm sure you won't mind

taking over as chauffeur for a while.

I do have other things to do.

I'd be delighted.

No! Mr. Roarke?

Naya, I'm sorry about your ankle,

but why did you walk out on me, on us?

I don't want to talk about it.

All right.

Would you stop wheeling me about

in this infant buggy?

Naya, just...

Just what is it you want?

You, Duke McCall.

You're a strange, wonderful, unique lady.

No. Duke, it's no good.

I can't explain.

Please just take me back to my bungalow,

please.

MITCH: We have to talk.

There's nothing to say.

I can't explain why I did what I did.

Well, I'm not asking you to.

I really should go and pack.

I have to leave and go back to reality

and face the music.

We'll face it together.

There's no reason for you to get involved, Mitch.

I think there is.

Every reason in the world.

Oh, Mitch.

I'm sorry I made such a mess of things.

No, no, no, I'm the one that's sorry.

Sorry for all the time I've wasted

we could have spent together,

and I don't mean in a bank vault.

I was so into my work I...

I didn't have time for what I was feeling.

But I do now.

I'm glad, but there's...

There's no way to undo what I did.

You did get in a few good whacks, didn't you?

When I think of you banging away

at Charlene Hunt's pride and joy...

Yeah, but I don't think Veracorp

or Charlene Hunt found it very amusing.

Well, you... You just let me worry about that.

No, Mitch.

There's no reason to get involved,

and it won't look good to Mr. Forbes.

Hey, you wouldn't be

in this mess if it weren't for me,

so I'm going to get you out of it.

NAYA: Don't you see what Roarke has done?

Making me fall in love at a time like this

is his revenge

just because I played a little trick or two on him.

Oh, I'm positive he wouldn't do a thing like that, Madam.

Unless, of course, you say so.

I do say so.

Roarke knows how badly I want to end it all.

And he's mocking me.

Do you know that I've picked fights with killer whales?

I swam head-on into the Love Boat

just to end my immortality.

And nothing worked.

I can imagine you being very difficult

to defeat, Madam.

I thought, of all people,

Roarke will be sympathetic, Roarke will understand.

Does all this imply that Duke McCall

is the object of your passion?

Of course, that's what I'm saying.

To make me fall in love at a time like this,

the day I'm entering my mortality, is like...

Snatching a wonderful feast

from the mouth of an innocent baby shark.

Are you saying you want to change your fantasy, Naya?

Oh, there you are, sir.

Ms. Naya was just confiding her dilemma to me,

one which I will always treasure, Madam,

and one which I know

you will be delighted to solve for her, sir.

(CLEARS THROAT) Now, I must be about my duties.

Well, Naya.

Is it possible to change my fantasy?

Oh, anything's possible.

I could make this love affair last.

I really could, Roarke.

He is a mortal, Naya.

But the love I feel for Duke McCall is different.

I swear it.

You know the rules as well as I do.

But it would be so...

-Wonderful. -For how long?

For your maximum limit, which was what?

43 minutes.

Is that the fate you want for Mr. McCall?

No.

I truly am in love this time, Roarke.

No.

It's better.

Better I should die than Duke McCall.

(SOBBING)

CHARLENE: Mitch, what a pleasant surprise, come in.

I came here to talk to you about that offer you made me.

My help in exchange for

some kind of secure position at the bank

once it's fully automated.

The offer still stands.

Good.

Because I'm here to take you up on it.

Oh, Mitch.

Well, shall we consummate the deal?

Maybe we'd better talk about the terms.

Why waste time talking? It's simple.

You have something the machine doesn't.

You've got your years of experience dealing

face to face with Pinnacle customers.

Right, and in return

for my feeding all I know into the computer,

you drop all the charges against Ms. Martin.

Okay?

She was never part of the deal.

She is now.

I like your style.

Credit history, of course, is important

in determining whether or not to make a loan,

but past difficulties

should not automatically rule out

every applicant.

Are you... You getting it all, Laura?

Sure.

But aren't we just helping Charlene

tighten the noose around your neck?

Trust me...

Okay?

But most important of all... Are the intangibles.

Those little things you notice about a man or woman

who comes to a bank needing a loan.

(BEEPING)

It seems to be having a problem.

Good, now...

There are more important things than just dollars and cents.

Body language is extremely important.

(BEEPING)

Sure.

The way he looks you in the eye

or, in your case, the camera lens.

You have to get a gut feeling about a guy's integrity.

(BEEPING)

I don't think it understands "gut feeling".

That's tough.

It's going to be making decisions affecting

millions of people's lives.

It's got to learn about people.

What's really important is an applicant's

grit and gumption.

(BEEPING)

That extra something you need to go the distance

even though the odds on paper are against you.

Well, that completes the computer reprogramming.

Mr. Roarke, are you telling me

that Naya is actually a mermaid?

I am telling you precisely that,

Mr. McCall.

Do you believe me?

I was diving alone

in the Galapagos one time, Mr. Roarke.

At 60 feet, I heard this strange, eerie singing,

sweet and unearthly.

Full of unspoken promise.

Do you believe me?

Yes, I do.

Another time I was diving a wreck off of

Channel Islands in California.

As I swam toward an open hatchway, I...

Well, for an instant, just an instant,

I saw a woman's face framed there, smiling at me.

Then it was gone.

What are you telling me, Mr. McCall?

That I believe.

My life's prepared me to believe.

This explains so much about Naya.

The things she said she did in the sea.

Things no mortal woman could have done.

That strange allure.

You know that,

for a mortal man to love a mermaid,

that strange feminine essence of the sea...

Means to die.

Then the old legends are true.

Yes, but Naya truly loves you, Mr. McCall.

She has chosen to end her immortality.

Yes, to die herself rather than bring that fate to you.

She told you this?

She did.

And now I have a question for you, Mr. McCall.

Is your love strong enough?

Are you willing to do the same for her?

Die yourself...

To save her life?

Ladies and gentlemen, could I have your attention please,

Ladies and gentlemen?

Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen,

it's a very great pleasure indeed

for me to introduce you to the machine

that is going to revolutionize banking.

I give you Veracorp's automatic loan processing module.

COMPUTER: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

(APPLAUSE)

This machine can accept a written loan application

and immediately compute the bottom line.

The bottom line.

Perhaps we could put it to a test

with this loan application.

-Nothing I'd like better. -Good.

All right.

This module will now demonstrate its ability

to accept or reject a loan application.

COMPUTER: Thank you.

Enter number, please.

826280.

State transaction.

Loan application.

Processing.

-(BEEPING) -Accepted.

Rejected. Error.

Does not compute.

Does not compute? You have to compute.

-What's going on here? -Intangible.

Need more data. Loan accepted.

Do something, somebody, do something.

-Processing... -(BEEPING SLOWS)

Overload, overload...

-(SIZZLING) -(BEEPING)

Accepted, accepted...

(BEEPING ACCELERATES)

(SCREAMING)

Please, please, control yourselves.

LAWRENCE: It's only money.

-That is mine. -Madam, control yourself.

Let go or I'll punch your lights out!

Sir, I'm astounded.

Money makes animals out of perfectly normal people.

Of course, I had intended to turn this in

at the first opportunity, sir.

I would never doubt that, Lawrence,

not for a moment.

Mr. Roarke, what could have happened?

Well, I'm afraid your computer

has suffered a nervous breakdown.

The simple fact is, you're asking

this machine to do the impossible.

What is this?

A conspiracy to make me and the XP 500 look bad?

Quite frankly, Ms. Hunt,

I did ask Mr. Forbes to help me in conducting

a little experiment.

What kind of experiment?

ROARKE: Machine versus man.

Earlier I had Mr. Robinson look at that loan application,

and you approved it, correct?

MITCH: Yes, um...

That still doesn't prove a thing,

Mr. Roarke.

Just because Mitch okayed this loan

doesn't mean the module is wrong

about George Carruthers being a bad risk.

Except for one thing, Ms. Hunt.

We changed the name on the loan application

for this experiment.

It so happens that it's my loan application,

the very same one that I filled out years ago

to get the money to start my business.

You mean... You mean

George Carruthers is really you, Mr. Forbes?

That's right.

Oh, darling!

I knew you could beat that machine.

ROARKE: So you see, Ms. Hunt,

if Mr. Forbes had to rely

on the XP 500 for his loan,

there may never have been

a Pinnacle Savings and Loan

to whom you could sell it.

Well, so much for all the work

I've put into this great, big nothing.

Not so. I still intend to buy this for my bank.

-You do? -Of course.

It's a marvelous tool, and it's also a great time saver.

Mitch? How about you and I finding

a quiet place and discuss

your brilliant future with the bank?

Would you care to join us, Ms. Hunt?

Thank you.

So how will my ending happen?

You will enter the water here,

swim out to sea, Naya,

and then...

At least it'll happen out there.

How can I ever thank you for...

Arranging things?

A last favor for an old friend.

How could I refuse?

We've had some good times, haven't we, Roarke?

I see we're on time, sir.

Perfect, Lawrence.

Goodbye, Duke.

Have you made your decision, Mr. McCall?

Yes, I have.

Goodbye, Mr. Roarke.

Lawrence.

Mr. McCall...

Sir, do something.

I have, Lawrence, I have.

No, my love. Go back.

No, Naya, whatever happens happens to us together.

I suppose she'll spend the next 500 years

spawning little merbabies.

Yes.

And for both our sakes, Lawrence,

let's hope they all take after their father.

Amen, sir. Amen.

This weekend was everything you said it would be.

And more.

Then you feel like a useful human being again,

-Mr. Robinson? -Oh, more than that,

Mr. Roarke... I feel loved.

-Thank you. -You're very welcome.

-Goodbye, Mr. Robinson. -Lawrence.

-Ms. Martin. -Sir.

Love is indeed wonderful, sir.

Oh, yes.

But it's so hard to find that special someone.

I think I may have the solution.

-Yes, sir? -A foolproof way

to find your perfect mate.

-I'm all ears. -A computer dating service.

Come to think of it, looking is half the fun.

Make that possibly all the fun.