Original subtitles

[♪♪]

[HONKING]

[SCREAMS]

Hurry, Tattoo. Hurry.

You know this is my favorite day of the week.

I know, boss. It’s when the children come.

I love it. It’s the best time on Fantasy Island.

[♪♪]

[CAWS]

Oh, it’s time to go.

ALL: Hi, Mr. Roarke! Hi, Tattoo!

Hello, children. Good morning.

Good morning, Cindy. Good morning, Cindy.

TATTOO: Hurry, Cindy.

We don’t want to be late for the balloon.

Goodbye, children.

ALL: Bye! Bye.

[♪♪]

[GIGGLING]

Smiles, children. Smiles.

[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

Your turn to guess first this week, Tattoo.

TATTOO: I say she look like a school teacher.

Like the one who almost failed me in the fifth grade.

Well, that’s very close.

Mrs. Ruth Ewell has, for the past 16 years,

operated an orphanage near Cleveland, Ohio.

A small orphanage, which is now being phased out.

Those children you see with her are Rebecca and Mark,

her last two charges.

What’s their fantasy, boss?

One they got from Miss Ewell’s.

Something she dreamed when she was a child,

and also in an orphanage.

Just once for the children

to help select their own parents.

And not the other way around.

TATTOO: Can we really do that, boss?

Can we give them the parents they want?

Within reason, Tattoo.

Within reason.

TATTOO: It’s your turn to guess, Cindy.

Talk about the odd couple.

Bad comedy act?

ROARKE: I’m afraid there’s nothing comedic

about those two, my friends.

Cornelius Kelly worked for me

here at the hotel on Fantasy Island

until I discovered he was a petty chiseler and fired him.

What are they doing on Fantasy Island?

Cornelius claims to want a quiet vacation for his friend.

But I know he has returned to fulfill a fantasy.

To revenge himself on me for having discharged him years ago.

Couldn’t that be dangerous?

Danger comes in many disguises, Cindy.

[♪♪]

My dear guests,

I am Mr. Roarke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]

Well, Cornelius,

how does it feel to be back on Fantasy Island?

Oh, delightful as usual, Mr. Roarke.

CORNELIUS: I do hope our past difficulties can be forgotten.

I’d like nothing better than to think

that we could be friends again.

As you know, one of my cardinal rules

is always to try to forgive and forget.

If I were to have any doubts

as to which way to chose,

your sincerity has certainly convinced me.

Uh, my trusted assistant, Tattoo.

Oh, yes.

I’ve heard quite a lot

about your friend, Tattoo.

It’s an honor to meet you.

Charmed. And this is Cindy,

who helps me on this side of the island.

A pleasure to meet you, Mr. Kelly.

Pleasure is all mine, my child.

If there’s anything I can do for you or your friend--

Yes, there is, Cindy. There is something you can do.

I’ve always told Alphonse here about the

beautiful interior of this island.

And I’d like to take him for a little picnic to show him.

But I’ve been away so long.

And I know the island has changed so much.

I wouldn’t know where to begin.

I’m sure Tattoo will be happy to direct you

to a pleasant spot. Won’t you?

Cindy and I have other guests to attend to.

Uh, bon appétit.

Cindy?

[♪♪]

Well, you wanna take us to a good picnic place?

Or are we gonna stand around here all day?

This way, please.

[♪♪]

Come on. What’s taking you so long?

Oh, it’s just that it’s all so lovely.

Seems to be, uh, very secluded here.

You know, I hate to go on a picnic

where people are liable to come

tramping through at any moment.

Oh, don’t worry. Nobody ever comes here.

Then this will do just nicely.

Alphonse, hubba-hubba!

[♪♪]

What you doing? Leave me alone!

[♪♪]

CORNELIUS: Alphonse, hold him! Hold him!

[LAUGHS]

I got him!

[TATTOO SCREAMS]

I’ll be right with you, boss!

Miss Ewell, children,

this will be your home during your stay on Fantasy Island.

You mean they’re in there?

They?

He means our new parents.

Oh, my dear children.

Your fantasy was for you to have a hand

in choosing your own parents.

But I thought they’d already done that.

All those questions they answered.

Of course, I know you reserve the right to final authority.

ROARKE: As I still do.

After the children make their wishes known,

I’ll have to decide if their decision is the best for them.

And I’m sure it will be.

The children’s answers certainly did give us a good indication.

The qualities Mark and Rebecca listed

for future parents were rather extensive.

CINDY: I’m afraid even Roarke couldn’t find

any one set of parents who possesses all of them.

However, two couples did emerge the strongest.

You mean two sets of parents?

Two sets of prospective parents.

One which leans toward aesthetics.

Music, arts and education.

The other couple are very athletic, outdoor people.

When will we begin?

As soon as you and Rebecca change into

more appropriate clothes.

Because right about now... ah, yes.

There they are.

Enjoy yourselves, children.

These may be your new parents.

Rebecca? Joe Drake.

Hi. Hi.

I’m Evie. Hi.

Mr. and Mrs. Drake, may I introduce Miss Ewell.

Hi. Hello.

Mr. and Mrs. Drake are here

to take Mark and Rebecca for the day.

[♪♪]

[TATTOO GRUNTS]

Go on, smart guy.

Try to make a break for it.

The things I could do to stop you

would make strong men weep.

Big talk. Big mouth.

You’re just a little creep.

Why don’t you grow up, you weirdo.

[LAUGHS] Weird?

You’ll be sorry you said that.

Ah! Ah! Ah!

Alphonse, pick on somebody your size.

Field telephone is all hooked up.

Time to make the call.

You’re lucky-- Come on!

Your struggles are useless. You’ve been kidnapped.

And this castle is in the most remote and inaccessible spot

on Fantasy Island.

Roarke will never guess where you are.

[SCOFFS]

Hubba-hubba!

[PHONE RINGS]

Yes?

CORNELIUS: We’ve got your sidekick.

You what?

There is no need for dramatics, Mr. Roarke.

We are desperate men and we mean what we say.

Unless you pay the ransom we ask,

you’ll never see Tattoo again.

Are you saying that you’ve kidnapped Tattoo?

You really fell for that old buddy-buddy routine

hook, line and sinker, didn’t you?

You’d better believe we kidnapped Tattoo.

And we mean what we say.

You must not harm him.

Now, what do you want?

CORNELIUS: The deed to Fantasy Island.

The deed to Fantasy Island?

Do I hear an echo?

Uh, but how do I know that Tattoo is alive at this moment?

Untie him. Bring him to the phone.

[♪♪]

Hubba-hubba.

Here we go.

ALPHONSE: There, just about untied.

Oh! Snake!

All right. All right. All-- Oh!

Get off!

I’ll get him!

Speak!

I’ll make him talk!

CORNELIUS: Speak.

I said talk.

[BLOWS RASPBERRY]

[GIBBERS]

That’s Tattoo, all right.

Is that you, Tattoo?

Uh, how are things in Red Chief?

CORNELIUS: Uh, I couldn’t get him to speak.

But perhaps you recognized the raspberry?

To give you ownership of Fantasy Island

is an incredible price, Cornelius.

I’ll have to look into methods of liquidating

my holdings and transferring

ownership stock.

It will be complex and time consuming.

Take your time, Mr. Roarke.

We’ll call you back in two hours.

Two hours won’t be sufficient.

I’m sorry.

That’s all the time we can spare.

But I’m sure you’ll make the most of it.

Particularly since your friend’s life

is hanging in the balance.

[CORNELIUS LAUGHS]

Have a nice day, Mr. Roarke.

[BLOWS RASPBERRY]

Hold it!

That sounded pretty final.

[CHESTER WHIMPERS]

Don’t worry, Chester.

There are three sides to every triangle.

What happens now? Wanna give me a hand?

MARK: Hey, all right!

Scuba gear. Is it your hobby?

Oh, no. Not with us.

Evie and I are marine biologists.

Marine what?

Biologists.

We work with undersea life.

You know, like fishes and things.

You’ll see in a minute.

Miss Ewell gave us your sizes.

These rigs have the latest gizmos.

Underwater communicators.

Last one in the water’s a jellyfish.

[♪♪]

Wow! Is this ever neat!

Real neato!

ELLIE: Hey, it’s a sunken ship.

JOE: Look, kids. Do you see what I see?

REBECCA: Can we bring it up?

We can try.

Wow!

We’re rich!

JOE [LAUGHS]: Well, not exactly.

Let me see.

These look more like

candy coins to me, than gold ones.

Chocolate.

MARK: Quit complaining.

It’s better than nothing.

Hey, Mr. Drake, you brought that candy on that ship,

didn’t you? It’s a possibility.

Well, later for the candy, kids.

Right now we’re gonna build a fire and roast hot dogs.

[♪♪]

You know something, Mr. Drake?

This is the most exciting day in our entire lives.

[♪♪]

Get comfortable, my friend.

This will be your home

until Roarke comes up with your ransom.

[♪♪]

CORNELIUS: Go ahead.

Try to escape.

This room is a good 200 feet above the rocks and sea.

And another thing.

Since you wouldn’t talk to Roarke on the phone,

you’re not gonna get anything to eat.

Not even a crust of moldy bread,

until you decide to cooperate.

No fraternizing with the prisoner.

Come on!

[♪♪]

Give me another carrot.

And we went scuba diving.

Down under the water with all the fish.

And we found a sunken treasure.

Of course, it was only candy.

And after that we built a huge bonfire and ate hotdogs.

Well, I gather you both had a very enjoyable day.

It was really super.

And Mr. and Mrs. Drake are really nice.

I’m sure that you and Rebecca

would have a very wonderful life with them.

As I am sure you would with Mr. and Mrs. Samuels,

who you’ll meet tomorrow.

Oh, yeah. I kind of forgot about them.

Well, I don’t expect they’ve forgotten about you.

Mr. Samuels is a fifth grade teacher.

And his wife teaches piano.

Ugh, they’re teachers?

RUTH: Sounds pretty dull, huh?

Suppose I told you that

Mr. Samuels is also a magician?

And a very good one.

Really?

Mm-hmm.

Now you two take a bath.

I’ll have dinner for you.

[LAUGHS] Go on.

[♪♪]

Room service.

Oh!

Great-looking grub, chief.

I don’t know what I’ll enjoy more.

Having a meal fit for a king

or knowing that that little crumb in there

is getting nothing.

Maybe we should let him have a little water, huh?

He’s gone!

That’s impossible!

The only way out is through the windows!

And that’s a 200-foot drop to the rocks below!

I tell you, he’s not in his room!

Hey!

Come on!

If he jumped to his death, I’ll kill him!

Where is he?

Come out!

I can’t find him anywhere. I can’t figure it out.

I selected this tower room carefully myself.

The only way out is the door.

Excep-- [RUMBLING SOUND]

[♪♪]

Ah-ha.

Ah-ha. Up the chimney.

Up the chimney.

I know you’re up there, Tattoo.

If you don’t come right down,

we’re gonna light a nice little fire under your carcass.

How would you prefer it?

Rare or medium?

How about well done?

Well done.

TATTOO: No! No! Don’t fry me!

Oh, please don’t fry me! Don’t burn me!

Calm down, you termite.

TATTOO: I’m stuck! Get me out of here!

Oh, please! Get me out of here! Help!

How do we uncork him from the chimney, chief?

Quite simple.

You and I will climb up on the roof.

Yeah. I will lower you

down the chimney on a rope.

Yeah.

Then depending on his predicament,

you will either pull him out...

Yeah. ...or push him back down.

Oh.

Let’s go! Hey, wait a minute!

The roof! You know I’m afraid of heights.

Then don’t look up. Oh.

Come on! Let’s go!

[♪♪]

Are you climbing with your eyes closed?

Open them and get down the chimney.

I’m gonna fall! You’re not gonna fall.

Open your eyes, get up there and get down the chimney.

You don’t forget to hold onto the rope!

I’ll hold onto the rope. Hold onto this rope.

All right.

At least now they get a chance to get out.

Not bad.

Now get down that chimney! I can’t do it!

Boss, wait a minute! Let’s think this over, no!

No, no, no! Think like a brave man!

[ARGUING INDISTINCTLY]

[SCREAMING]

[♪♪]

[SCREAMS]

CORNELIUS: Alphonse, Get me down!

Bonjour.

Have a good day.

[LOUD THUD] Ow!

What?

[COUGHS]

I think I’m starting to like it here.

[LAUGHS]

CORNELIUS: It isn’t over.

You still can’t get away.

[LAUGHS]

[♪♪]

Okay. Good night, Mark. Good night.

Good night, sweetie.

Miss Ewell?

Can I ask you a personal question?

Certainly.

Since we’re the last of your kids,

and we’ll be going soon,

aren’t you gonna be, you know, lonely?

[♪♪]

Yes. Well, I--

I expect I will be a bit lonely at first.

But that’s to be expected after being

surrounded with children for so many years.

Someone once said, "People are lonely

because they build walls instead of bridges."

I guess I’ll just have to build some new bridges, won’t I?

Well,

time for prayers and lights out.

You have a big day tomorrow.

How does one build new bridges?

ROARKE: But I expected your call hours ago.

When I didn’t hear from you, I assumed

you had a change of heart and were releasing Tattoo.

Releasing him? Are you demented?

The only way you’ll see him again is if you pay the price.

Well, that’s become difficult.

The paperwork in transferring the island

is much more complex than I first anticipated.

It may take weeks.

Weeks?

CORNELIUS: Uh...

Look, uh, I don’t think

we want Fantasy Island after all.

That could be a very wise decision.

Exactly. Look, why don’t we keep it on a strictly cash basis?

Hah? Ten million dollars for the life of your little friend.

ROARKE: A bargain, really,

when you consider the priceless worth of a human being.

Particularly a rare individual like Tattoo.

Uh, but I’ll need time.

At least until noon tomorrow.

Oh, and, uh, one thing more.

This time I must speak with Tattoo,

to be sure he’s all right. You got it. Noon tomorrow.

Here he is.

Hi, boss.

How’s it going, Red Chief?

[MIMICS NATIVE AMERICAN WAR CRY]

Well, you... you heard him.

Start collecting the 10 million.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]

[SQUAWKS] Hello.

Oh, good morning, Pepper.

PEPPER: Morning. I was hoping you’d fly by.

[PEPPER SQUAWKS] [GIBBERS]

Oh, Chester. You came too.

What’s a man without his friends for company?

Oh, come on. Pepper, untie my hands.

Chester, untie my feet.

Come on. Good.

Come on.

You got it.

Well, here we are for today’s sample parents.

Hey, why so glum?

Oh, he gets like that every once in a while.

I guess we both do.

I mean, those people want to adopt us.

CINDY: But you wish your real mom and dad were still alive?

How do you know?

That’s how I first came to Fantasy Island.

Just about when I was your age.

You mean, you’re an orphan too?

My parents were killed in a plane crash.

Mr. Roarke was the best friend they ever had.

They asked that if anything ever happened to them,

that he would raise me.

Mr. Roarke seems very nice.

Oh, he is.

But that didn’t stop me

from crying myself to sleep every night.

Until one day I realized,

that wasn’t what my parents would want for me.

They’d want me to be happy and to go on with my life.

And that’s what your mom and dad would want for you too.

You’ve just gotta be happy. Go on with your life.

And help choose your new parents.

But what if we don’t know who to pick?

You’ll know, Mark. In your heart you’ll know.

But what if we don’t?

Well, then you’ll just have

to trust Mr. Roarke.

He very rarely makes mistakes.

Come on.

[♪♪]

I’ll get it.

Hi. Come in.

Oh, wait a minute.

Don’t tell me. Let me guess.

Superman and Wonder Woman!

I’m Craig and this is Ellen. Hi.

I think you’re in good hands,

for the time being anyway.

Thank you, Cindy.

Bye-bye. Bye, Cindy.

Bye, Cindy. Bye.

I’ve got a fresh batch of cookies

coming out of the oven right now.

That’s what I love about my wife.

No subtlety at all.

A couple of years from now, you could be in my class.

What are your favorite subjects?

Rabbits. Rabbits?

Yeah, the kind that come out of a hat.

Oh, I see. My reputation precedes me, hah?

Well, I don’t know about rabbits,

but take a look at this.

All right.

Got the cone.

Now I’ll need a little milk.

Oh.

Oh, no. Now, the milk into the cone.

Now watch very, very carefully.

[♪♪]

Ah, a little more.

Oops.

All right, that’s enough milk.

Okay.

Hold it down there.

Oh!

That’s what I call evaporated milk.

That’s neat. When it comes to magic,

there’s virtually nothing Craig can’t do.

I’m afraid Mr. Roarke feels the same way.

He’s asked me to put on a magic show at lunchtime.

But there’s no way.

Why not?

I need a couple of assistants.

Can’t do the show without help.

BOTH: We’ll help!

[♪♪]

CORNELIUS: I think I’ll use

my share of the 10 million to travel.

I’ve always wanted to see Uganda.

[GASPS]

Can’t be.

[SQUAWKS]

There he goes! Come on!

There he goes!

After him! ALPHONSE: But, boss!

You know how I feel about heights.

Hubba-hubba.

I’ll cut him off downstairs.

Hubba-hubba. Hubba-hooba.

Hubba-hebba.

[♪♪]

I’m gonna get you.

All right.

Whoop, steady, steady.

I’ll get you.

[SCREAMS]

I got you!

Who are you?

[WHISTLES]

What’s for breakfast?

[WHINES]

[LAUGHS]

ALPHONSE: Did we get the 10 million?

Huh? Huh?

What did Roarke say?

He says he won’t pay over 1 million.

And he insists on seeing Tattoo alive.

He wants us to meet him on the swamp

at the north of the island this afternoon.

What’d you say? What time is it now?

[♪♪]

CRAIG: Children, watch carefully and see

if you can figure out how this is done.

Ah!

[ALL LAUGH]

[CLAPPING]

A dove.

Now would you believe that my little girl is in this box?

ALL: No!

All right. What about this box?

CRAIG: Do you believe she’s here?

ALL: No!

Okay, what do you think about this box?

She’s gotta be in this box. What do you say?

ALL: No!

All right, then.

You know and I know she’s got to be in this box.

And this magic wand will confirm it.

[LOUD BANG]

Rebecca,

are you in this box?

ALL: Yeah.

Rebecca, would you please come out now?

[♪♪]

CRAIG: I asked for Rebecca. You’re Mark!

[ALL LAUGH]

Now, Rebecca, will you please come out this time?

[ALL CHEER]

Roarke, are you alone?

Of course.

Now, where’s Tattoo?

Stay there.

We’ll let you have a look at him.

Alphonse, bring him forward.

Hubba-hubba!

You heard what the man said. March.

When I give you the orders,

stick your head out of the bushes

so Roarke can get a good look at you.

Reach for the sky, meatball.

[PEPPER SQUAWKS]

You heard me. Reach for the sky.

See you later.

ALPHONSE: Hey! Hey! Come back here!

Come back here now!

Ignore that commotion. Has nothing to do with us.

We have the situation completely under control.

ALPHONSE: Where are you? Tattoo!

ALPHONSE: Get back here. Are you all right?

Hi, boss.

TATTOO: I’m having a ball.

Good. Take care, Tattoo.

He’s in the clearing!

[LAUGHS]

ALPHONSE: Yoo-hoo!

Come out wherever you are.

Come out, come out.

[GIBBERS]

You won’t be free for long, Tattoo.

You can’t get away.

You might as well come out.

[ROARS] [SCREAMS]

Help!

I think we lost him, Chief.

Me, running out on my buddies?

When I’m having so much fun?

Hey, guys,

I want to stay with you all the time.

[LAUGHS]

[SOBBING]

[LAUGHS]

[♪♪]

Well, I guess that’s the price you pay for being a performer.

While everyone else is eating, you’re working.

That’s okay.

We didn’t mind. It was fun.

So you liked Mr. and Mrs. Samuels, huh?

Oh, yes.

And the same can be said for Mr. and Mrs. Drake?

Yeah. We liked them too.

Well, tonight when we see Mr. Roarke,

you’ll have to decide which couple you like best.

Which couple you want to be your mother and father.

Who do you choose, Miss Ewell?

Oh, no, you don’t.

I’m not going to influence your choice.

Miss Ewell?

How come you never got married and had kids?

Oh, I did have kids, Rebecca.

I had hundreds of them.

But they weren’t your own.

Weren’t they?

What Mark means is that

there weren’t any that you could hang on to.

Either they were adopted or they grew up and moved away.

Well, they were mine for a time.

And I was grateful for that.

Not even a parent can hang onto a child forever.

Especially if you love them,

you must give them their freedom.

I just thought of something.

What’s that? Now that you won’t be stuck

with us anymore,

you’ll have time to get married and have your own family.

That’s a great idea!

Untie him.

But I don’t want to go yet.

There is so much stuff we’re gonna do together.

I’m having so much fun.

Hold him!

Oh, no. I’m sorry. I don’t give handouts to vagrants.

If you’re willing to work,

plenty to do in the kitchen.

It’s me. Cornelius.

Oh, I am so sorry.

I didn’t recognize you.

Why, you look terrible.

Never mind the way I look.

We brought him back.

Look, forget the million dollars.

Give us $10,000 and he’s yours

free and clear. Oh, I’m sorry.

I...

I really don’t think I want him back just now.

Everything has been so nice and peaceful

during his absence, you know?

Five thousand.

Uh, okay.

A measly thousand. But that’s my last offer.

No, I think the $10,000 figure is acceptable.

I always said you were a very fair man.

Then we have a deal.

You pay me 10,000 to take him back.

What?

Then we have no deal?

He’s your friend. You’ve gotta take him back.

I’m afraid not. I’m sorry.

But where do you expect me

to come up with that money?

Well, there is plenty to do in the kitchen.

Two of you working the dinner shift

for tonight, breakfast and lunch for tomorrow.

Room service orders.

You do that,

and I’ll call it even.

Why quibble over a few thousand dollars?

Never!

Tomorrow my price goes up.

Done.

Alphonse? Bring him in.

Hubba-hubba.

[♪♪]

How much did you get, chief?

Uh, he got 600.

[CHESTER GIBBERS]

Six hundred bucks?

No, 600 chickens.

Huh? [LAUGHS]

That’s how many you have to clean.

[♪♪]

You can’t miss the kitchen.

It’s right down the corridor.

Oh, uh, and...

happy chicken flicking.

I’ve never flicked a chicken before.

What do you do? Flick the chicken then boil the water?

Or then boil the water and then you flick the chicken?

[CHUCKLING]

Miss me, boss? Oh, yes.

Yes, my friend.

Home just wasn’t the same without you.

[♪♪]

Go on.

Mr. Roarke? Yes.

We think we know who we want for our parents.

If you agree, of course.

Tell me.

I think you have made a very wise decision.

Now I think it’s time to tell the others.

Go on. Go on.

Mr. and Mrs. Drake,

my sister and I, we both think you’re super.

We loved the scuba diving and all that other stuff.

Mr. and Mrs. Samuels,

Mark and I had so much fun being a part of the magic show.

And we both think you’re so very nice.

And I do want to learn how to play the piano.

And I-- And I...

Now, now children,

you must tell which couple you want me to choose

to be your parents.

Neither one of them.

Huh?

REBECCA: What Mark means is that...

we want Miss Ewell to be our parent.

But that’s impossible.

I mean,

Mr. Roarke has done such an excellent job selecting

two sets of prospective parents.

And anyway, if I were to adopt you,

that would mean breaking a firm rule

I’ve always had.

The children must have both father and mother.

But you are our mother and father.

You taught me swimming, horseback riding

and baseball.

REBECCA: Sewing and reading

and everything.

Please, Miss Ewell. Please adopt us.

Oh, I-- I don’t know. I can’t.

Miss Ewell, I think you have to.

From what the children told us about you

the one day we had them,

you already are their parents.

I hate to break in new assistants,

but I’m afraid the lady is right.

As for your adoption rules,

didn’t they also provide that the parents be someone

the children love very dearly?

Isn’t that really the most important thing?

Well, yes, I-- I always tried...

That was part of...

You really do want me?

More than anything.

ROARKE: Well, then, it’s settled.

The children are yours.

[♪♪]

[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

Bye. Goodbye, Mrs. Drake.

Mr. Drake, goodbye. Pleasant journey.

Goodbye.

Mr. Roarke? Thank you from all three of us.

My wish was for the children to choose their own parents.

But I never dreamed it would be me.

Why not? This is Fantasy Island.

Miss Ewell, someone as unselfish as you

deserves a fantasy all her own.

We hope you like yours.

Oh, I love it.

And I love them. And I love all of you.

Thank you.

You’re welcome and congratulations, Miss Ewell.

Rebecca, Mark, goodbye.

Bye-bye. Bye.

Bye-bye. Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Cornelius, Alphonse,

I want you to know you did a fine job in the kitchen.

Any time you want a steady job, it’s yours.

Forget it.

All we want is get on that balloon

and get back to the mainland.

I’m afraid today’s flight’s all booked up.

Even if it weren’t, the balloon fare is beyond your pocketbook.

Well, after all, you still owe me quite a bit of money

for Tattoo’s, um, rescue.

But don’t worry. I’ve made other arrangements for your trip back.

You can work your way over onboard the boat.

The S.S. Dumpwell, is a garbage scout.

ROARKE: Yes.

[GRUNTS]

Here comes the skipper now.

Don’t-- Don’t make him mad.

He has a horrible reputation.

Oh, and if you have any time,

which I doubt very much you will,

try reading this.

Snap it up, you lubbers,

and make ready to stow your gear.

We sail with the tide!

And I’ll be wanting bilge cleaned before this!

Heave to!

Heave!

I never cleaned a bilge before.

What do you do? Boil the water,

then you clean...

Gee, boss,

I’m gonna miss them.

It’s not every day that I’ve got good guys to play with.

By the way, boss,

what was that book you gave them?

One they should have read before they came here.

The Ransom of Red Chief, by O. Henry.

Bye.

Bye.

Goodbye, everyone. Goodbye, everybody.

Goodbye.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]