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Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
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♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
3
00:00:11,393 --> 00:00:13,959
♪ All the dark
goes down the drain ♪
4
00:00:13,961 --> 00:00:17,699
♪ Again and again and again ♪
5
00:00:19,768 --> 00:00:22,735
♪ When darkness finds you
you'll be free ♪
6
00:00:22,737 --> 00:00:25,572
♪ Follow the lights and you
will see ♪
7
00:00:25,574 --> 00:00:29,479
♪ The instantaneous eternity ♪
8
00:00:30,946 --> 00:00:34,817
♪ The instantaneous eternity ♪♪
9
00:00:36,851 --> 00:00:40,653
Life is a journey
and as we move along the path,
10
00:00:40,655 --> 00:00:44,024
we move closer to the light
that awaits us.
11
00:00:44,026 --> 00:00:47,693
But I say, "Why wait?
Why not launch yourself
12
00:00:47,695 --> 00:00:50,599
into that instantaneous
eternity right now?"
13
00:00:51,500 --> 00:00:55,034
It's, like, let's say you love
peppermint ice cream.
14
00:00:55,036 --> 00:00:57,470
And they say, "Well, you can
have peppermint ice cream,
15
00:00:57,472 --> 00:01:01,540
but only if you wait
like 75 or 80 years." Hm.
16
00:01:01,542 --> 00:01:03,610
But then you look
and there's that whole tub of,
17
00:01:03,612 --> 00:01:06,880
pile of peppermint ice cream,
the hog-and-dance stuff,
18
00:01:06,882 --> 00:01:10,383
the expensive stuff,
right there in the freezer.
19
00:01:10,385 --> 00:01:12,719
What are you gonna do?
You're just gonna look at it?
20
00:01:12,721 --> 00:01:15,856
No. You're gonna eat it, right?
21
00:01:15,858 --> 00:01:17,990
And that's what death is.
22
00:01:17,992 --> 00:01:21,697
It's eating that peppermint
ice cream on your terms.
23
00:01:24,966 --> 00:01:27,701
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
24
00:01:27,703 --> 00:01:30,436
♪ All the dark
goes down the drain ♪
25
00:01:30,438 --> 00:01:35,675
♪ Again and again
and again ♪
26
00:01:35,677 --> 00:01:38,645
♪ When darkness finds you
you'll be free ♪
27
00:01:38,647 --> 00:01:41,113
♪ Follow the lights and you
will see ♪
28
00:01:41,115 --> 00:01:46,019
♪ The instantaneous eternity ♪
29
00:01:46,021 --> 00:01:49,121
♪ Oh ooh ooh ♪
30
00:01:49,123 --> 00:01:53,126
♪ Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ♪
31
00:01:53,128 --> 00:01:56,862
♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪♪
32
00:02:44,712 --> 00:02:48,982
I say to you, ignore the
teachings of the sacred Storsh
33
00:02:48,984 --> 00:02:50,983
at your peril!
34
00:02:50,985 --> 00:02:53,519
My child, you need to be saved.
35
00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:56,790
The sacred Storsh
can give you bliss,
36
00:02:56,792 --> 00:02:58,524
joy and blessings to you...
37
00:02:58,526 --> 00:03:00,125
- Can you put s-some music on?
- Change your story.
38
00:03:00,127 --> 00:03:01,761
- I, I like...
- Change your story!
39
00:03:01,763 --> 00:03:03,062
I like whatever you like.
40
00:03:03,064 --> 00:03:05,798
You must change your story!
41
00:03:21,782 --> 00:03:25,584
- Hey!
- Oh, my God! Hi, smiley!
42
00:03:25,586 --> 00:03:27,186
- Hey, smiley.
- Hi! Mwah.
43
00:03:27,188 --> 00:03:28,822
Look, look.
44
00:03:28,824 --> 00:03:30,823
Look what I did. It's us.
45
00:03:30,825 --> 00:03:33,692
Oh, you made
your own toy surprise.
46
00:03:33,694 --> 00:03:35,127
Yeah, well,
there wasn't one in the box.
47
00:03:35,129 --> 00:03:37,731
Cute. Okay, that's great.
Well...
48
00:03:37,733 --> 00:03:39,031
Hey, how was your first day?
49
00:03:39,033 --> 00:03:40,633
Oh, it was, it was really good,
actually.
50
00:03:40,635 --> 00:03:42,135
Yeah, I think everything's gonna
be really fun,
51
00:03:42,137 --> 00:03:44,070
everyone seems nice
and, um, they...
52
00:03:44,072 --> 00:03:46,305
It seems like it's gonna be
really creative.
53
00:03:46,307 --> 00:03:48,642
You will never guess
what campaign I'm doing.
54
00:03:48,644 --> 00:03:50,175
Oh, I'm not good at guessing,
Claire.
55
00:03:50,177 --> 00:03:51,678
No, you can do it. Okay, okay.
56
00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:53,947
One, two, three.
57
00:03:53,949 --> 00:03:55,180
I don't know.
58
00:03:55,182 --> 00:03:57,250
- I-it's Rainbow Oats.
- No way!
59
00:03:57,252 --> 00:03:59,318
- I love this bird!
- I know! I know!
60
00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,020
I actually said it's my
boyfriend's favorite cereal.
61
00:04:01,022 --> 00:04:03,123
That's so great! Rainbow Oats?
62
00:04:03,125 --> 00:04:05,225
I know, I know.
Well, how was your day?
63
00:04:05,227 --> 00:04:06,927
Oh, God, I had the best day.
64
00:04:06,929 --> 00:04:07,994
- Yeah?
- I had such a great day.
65
00:04:07,996 --> 00:04:09,629
Well, what, what did you do?
66
00:04:09,631 --> 00:04:13,132
Well, some very serious progress
on the job front.
67
00:04:13,134 --> 00:04:14,334
You finished
your resume?
68
00:04:14,336 --> 00:04:16,702
- Ye... No.
- Ye...
69
00:04:16,704 --> 00:04:18,271
No, nothing like that.
70
00:04:18,273 --> 00:04:20,910
Um, no, but progress up here.
71
00:04:22,209 --> 00:04:24,243
Well, you know, it, um...
72
00:04:24,245 --> 00:04:25,878
It all starts with a thought.
73
00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:26,848
Mm-hmm.
74
00:04:28,350 --> 00:04:29,951
Can I have a Rainbow Oat?
75
00:04:31,252 --> 00:04:32,654
Yeah.
76
00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:46,002
Hey, should we do
that thing?
77
00:04:47,836 --> 00:04:50,103
- Yeah, let's do this.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!
78
00:04:50,105 --> 00:04:51,605
All right.
79
00:04:51,607 --> 00:04:53,740
- You ready? Okay.
- Yeah, okay.
80
00:04:53,742 --> 00:04:55,244
- Hm, that went well.
- Mm.
81
00:04:57,178 --> 00:04:58,911
- I'm gonna start.
- Do it.
82
00:04:58,913 --> 00:05:01,081
- Okay, ready?
- Uh-huh.
83
00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:03,015
♪ Do you like me? I suppose ♪
84
00:05:03,017 --> 00:05:04,851
♪ Draw me like a French girl
Jack and Rose ♪
85
00:05:04,853 --> 00:05:06,786
♪ Sun goes up
and you milk that cow ♪
86
00:05:06,788 --> 00:05:08,654
♪ Slap that udder
on the big bad cow ♪
87
00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,156
♪ Watch that cow
drink all that grass ♪
88
00:05:10,158 --> 00:05:12,392
♪ Sometimes a donkey's
called an ass-k ♪
89
00:05:12,394 --> 00:05:14,159
♪ Me a question I'll tell you
what I'm thinking... ♪♪
90
00:05:14,161 --> 00:05:16,863
Don't, uh... No, no,
every night, every night!
91
00:05:16,865 --> 00:05:19,899
- Aah, you were so close.
- Ah! Oh! At the donkey's ass.
92
00:05:19,901 --> 00:05:21,200
Yeah, the donkey
ask me a question
93
00:05:21,202 --> 00:05:22,868
and I'll tell you
what I'm thinking.
94
00:05:32,747 --> 00:05:36,082
- I know that smile.
- What smile?
95
00:05:36,084 --> 00:05:38,218
The smile,
less-than-a-smile smile.
96
00:05:38,220 --> 00:05:39,355
Hm.
97
00:05:40,956 --> 00:05:42,290
Can you tell me what's going on?
98
00:05:44,225 --> 00:05:45,759
- Come on.
- No.
99
00:05:45,761 --> 00:05:47,894
- Don't do that.
- No, it's fine.
100
00:05:47,896 --> 00:05:50,029
- You're forcing me.
- No.
101
00:05:50,031 --> 00:05:51,731
I'm going to do it.
102
00:05:51,733 --> 00:05:53,265
You're forcing my fingers
of truth.
103
00:05:53,267 --> 00:05:55,735
- No. No.
- It's happening.
104
00:05:55,737 --> 00:05:57,202
- No. No.
- I'm going to.
105
00:05:57,204 --> 00:05:58,738
- Here I go! I'm going to!
- No, no, Paul!
106
00:05:58,740 --> 00:05:59,973
- Paul, no... No, no...
- I'm going to...
107
00:05:59,975 --> 00:06:01,341
I'll punch you in the balls.
108
00:06:01,343 --> 00:06:02,808
- I'll punch you in the balls.
- Don't do that.
109
00:06:02,810 --> 00:06:04,713
Don't do it.
110
00:06:11,353 --> 00:06:14,887
Do you think we did
the right thing moving here?
111
00:06:14,889 --> 00:06:17,223
Yeah,
of course we did.
112
00:06:17,225 --> 00:06:18,757
I mean, look at us. We're...
113
00:06:18,759 --> 00:06:21,360
This is like you're,
you're in your dream job
114
00:06:21,362 --> 00:06:24,163
and we're in this
radical apartment,
115
00:06:24,165 --> 00:06:25,998
we just started eating pizza.
116
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,068
Yeah.
117
00:06:29,403 --> 00:06:33,173
Why do you think
the rent is so cheap?
118
00:06:33,175 --> 00:06:34,740
It's like you always say,
you know,
119
00:06:34,742 --> 00:06:37,310
"Sometimes you just get lucky."
120
00:06:37,312 --> 00:06:38,314
Hm...
121
00:06:40,048 --> 00:06:41,149
Yeah.
122
00:07:03,038 --> 00:07:06,206
- Oh, God.
- Do you yield?
123
00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:07,810
What?
124
00:07:08,877 --> 00:07:10,243
Do you yield?
125
00:07:10,245 --> 00:07:13,880
- No.
- What is your book?
126
00:07:13,882 --> 00:07:17,082
I...
What?
127
00:07:17,084 --> 00:07:19,284
Ah! The Book Of Iowa.
128
00:07:19,286 --> 00:07:22,522
I select verse 23!
129
00:07:22,524 --> 00:07:24,824
"And the police
had no solid lead.
130
00:07:24,826 --> 00:07:28,428
The investigation being further
hampered by the suspect's sketch
131
00:07:28,430 --> 00:07:29,896
of a tall Indian man!"
132
00:07:29,898 --> 00:07:32,966
- What?
- Yes! I win!
133
00:07:52,086 --> 00:07:54,320
Ah. Oh, what...
134
00:07:54,322 --> 00:07:56,789
No!
135
00:07:56,791 --> 00:07:58,390
- Do you yield?
- Yes!
136
00:08:00,060 --> 00:08:02,327
- That's a cake knife.
- So what?
137
00:08:02,329 --> 00:08:04,163
Oh, God! Oh, God!
138
00:08:04,165 --> 00:08:06,166
Claire!
139
00:08:06,168 --> 00:08:08,200
Claire! Claire! Let me in!
140
00:08:08,202 --> 00:08:09,469
Oh, God! Oh, God!
141
00:08:09,471 --> 00:08:12,204
Oh, God! Oh, my God!
142
00:08:14,341 --> 00:08:17,243
No! Oh, God, God!
143
00:08:17,245 --> 00:08:18,344
Oh, God!
144
00:08:20,915 --> 00:08:24,851
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
145
00:08:24,853 --> 00:08:27,252
Are you all right?
Are you all right?
146
00:08:27,254 --> 00:08:30,055
Oh, no! Oh, no!
147
00:08:30,057 --> 00:08:32,291
What do we do?
148
00:08:36,030 --> 00:08:38,998
Okay, Wallace, enough!
149
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,600
I-i-it's photographed.
He's standing still.
150
00:08:41,602 --> 00:08:45,037
Goddammit!
That flash gives me migraines.
151
00:08:45,039 --> 00:08:48,074
You need 900 pictures?
Are you makin' a 3D model?
152
00:08:51,011 --> 00:08:53,046
All right, I'm gonna need
to take your statements.
153
00:08:53,048 --> 00:08:54,180
Just tell me everything
that you know
154
00:08:54,182 --> 00:08:57,083
in your own words, Mr., uh...
155
00:08:57,085 --> 00:08:59,219
Boyd. Paul Boyd.
156
00:08:59,221 --> 00:09:00,386
And you're Mrs. Boyd?
157
00:09:00,388 --> 00:09:02,155
Oh, no,
we're, we're not married.
158
00:09:02,157 --> 00:09:05,557
Claire and I need
to get our things sorted.
159
00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:07,028
Mm.
160
00:09:17,172 --> 00:09:20,573
All right. You kids have fun.
161
00:09:20,575 --> 00:09:24,576
Wait a second. A guy just
killed himself in our bathtub.
162
00:09:24,578 --> 00:09:27,446
- Yeah.
- Why?
163
00:09:30,552 --> 00:09:33,453
From time to time,
members of a deranged cult
164
00:09:33,455 --> 00:09:35,021
break and enter
into this dwelling
165
00:09:35,023 --> 00:09:36,522
in order to commit self-murder.
166
00:09:36,524 --> 00:09:38,123
Did the super
not go over this with you
167
00:09:38,125 --> 00:09:39,224
when you looked
at the apartment?
168
00:09:40,261 --> 00:09:42,494
Knock, knock! Hi!
169
00:09:42,496 --> 00:09:44,631
Hello, Beatrice.
You're looking wonderful.
170
00:09:44,633 --> 00:09:46,632
And you are looking great,
Bloyce.
171
00:09:46,634 --> 00:09:48,100
Stop it.
172
00:09:48,102 --> 00:09:51,237
- Oh, here you go.
- Oh, what's this?
173
00:09:51,239 --> 00:09:54,140
Oh, I always buy my tenants
a carrot cake
174
00:09:54,142 --> 00:09:57,576
for their first tub death.
It's just a little tradition.
175
00:09:57,578 --> 00:10:01,013
- "Their first tub death?"
- Save me a piece.
176
00:10:01,015 --> 00:10:04,050
I'm making fish sticks later.
177
00:10:04,052 --> 00:10:05,919
Look, honestly, these cultist
178
00:10:05,921 --> 00:10:07,320
t-they're basically harmless.
179
00:10:07,322 --> 00:10:09,991
Their only goal
is an exit strategy.
180
00:10:12,326 --> 00:10:14,459
Are they that different?
What am I doing?
181
00:10:14,461 --> 00:10:16,128
I really do have to go.
182
00:10:16,130 --> 00:10:18,297
Hey! You can't just leave.
183
00:10:18,299 --> 00:10:20,599
We're totally exposed here.
184
00:10:20,601 --> 00:10:22,435
You're totally exposed?
185
00:10:22,437 --> 00:10:26,104
I'm the one that has to clean up
this mess night after night.
186
00:10:26,106 --> 00:10:28,574
Do you think this is how
I planned to spend my evening?
187
00:10:28,576 --> 00:10:31,710
I'm planned to be home
working on my screenplay.
188
00:10:31,712 --> 00:10:34,180
I just got a note that the
detective character doesn't have
189
00:10:34,182 --> 00:10:36,449
enough conflict.
I'm a detective.
190
00:10:36,451 --> 00:10:39,017
It's a screenplay
about a detective.
191
00:10:39,019 --> 00:10:40,486
There's conflict.
192
00:10:40,488 --> 00:10:43,355
This industry is bullshit.
193
00:10:43,357 --> 00:10:47,694
The point is,
instead, I'm here.
194
00:10:47,696 --> 00:10:50,432
More often then you guys,
by the way.
195
00:10:52,232 --> 00:10:53,401
Good luck.
196
00:10:55,003 --> 00:10:57,036
What do we do now?
197
00:10:57,038 --> 00:10:59,372
If I were you, I'd move!
198
00:11:08,549 --> 00:11:13,219
Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
199
00:11:13,221 --> 00:11:16,222
Look on the bright side.
200
00:11:16,224 --> 00:11:18,694
Maybe now we can try Winnipeg.
201
00:12:12,413 --> 00:12:15,614
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
202
00:12:15,616 --> 00:12:18,217
♪ All the dark
goes down the drain ♪
203
00:12:18,219 --> 00:12:22,057
♪ Again and again and again ♪
204
00:12:24,058 --> 00:12:27,093
♪ When darkness finds you
you'll be free ♪
205
00:12:27,095 --> 00:12:29,661
♪ Follow the lights
and you will see ♪
206
00:12:29,663 --> 00:12:33,701
♪ The instantaneous eternity ♪
207
00:12:35,302 --> 00:12:39,071
♪ The instantaneous eternity ♪
208
00:12:55,690 --> 00:12:56,692
Mm...
209
00:13:19,379 --> 00:13:21,216
Claire.
210
00:13:24,652 --> 00:13:27,189
Come to me, my child.
211
00:13:35,663 --> 00:13:37,633
Claire.
212
00:13:44,639 --> 00:13:47,142
Yeah, that's it.
213
00:13:54,481 --> 00:13:56,617
Ah, yeah.
214
00:14:25,879 --> 00:14:29,549
Wake up! Wake up, Paul!
Wake up!
215
00:14:29,551 --> 00:14:31,584
- Come on.
- I'm up, I'm up, I'm up...
216
00:14:31,586 --> 00:14:33,953
I was up all night
and I had a revelation.
217
00:14:33,955 --> 00:14:35,555
- You did? What is it?
- Yeah.
218
00:14:35,557 --> 00:14:37,823
We aren't going anywhere.
219
00:14:37,825 --> 00:14:39,324
- We're not?
- No.
220
00:14:39,326 --> 00:14:41,326
- We're not?
- No, because we're in LA.
221
00:14:41,328 --> 00:14:43,228
It's like
the land of, of movie stars
222
00:14:43,230 --> 00:14:44,930
and fancy cars, you know?
223
00:14:44,932 --> 00:14:46,866
There's like five places alone
on this block
224
00:14:46,868 --> 00:14:49,201
where you can get kombucha.
225
00:14:49,203 --> 00:14:50,802
What's that? What is kombucha?
226
00:14:50,804 --> 00:14:53,272
I don't even know.
A-and that's my point.
227
00:14:53,274 --> 00:14:55,273
You know, 'cause if
we're gonna be LA-ians,
228
00:14:55,275 --> 00:14:57,776
we-we gotta,
we gotta adapt, right?
229
00:14:57,778 --> 00:14:59,878
Yeah, yes, yes, I do know,
230
00:14:59,880 --> 00:15:02,848
what you, like a, mm,
like an adaptation.
231
00:15:02,850 --> 00:15:05,251
Yes, and we-we're,
we're not just gonna run away
232
00:15:05,253 --> 00:15:07,920
because some idiots wanna spill
their guts in our bathtub.
233
00:15:07,922 --> 00:15:10,956
No, no. This is our dream,
this is our destiny.
234
00:15:10,958 --> 00:15:13,559
Yes, I don't wanna run, Claire.
235
00:15:13,561 --> 00:15:16,228
I'm, I'm... Like you always say,
I'm lazy.
236
00:15:16,230 --> 00:15:19,397
We are strong
and we are, we are adaptable
237
00:15:19,399 --> 00:15:22,300
and we are,
we are Los Angelenos.
238
00:15:22,302 --> 00:15:25,771
Oh, gosh, dang it. I love you.
239
00:15:25,773 --> 00:15:28,406
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
240
00:15:28,408 --> 00:15:29,775
I love you, Claire.
241
00:15:29,777 --> 00:15:31,743
- Let me go back to bed, though.
- Oh, no.
242
00:15:34,414 --> 00:15:37,782
Claire, this meeting started
15 minutes ago.
243
00:15:37,784 --> 00:15:41,753
I am so sorry, some guy broke
into our apartment last night
244
00:15:41,755 --> 00:15:43,522
and then committed suicide
in the bathtub.
245
00:15:43,524 --> 00:15:45,023
I-I think he was like,
part of some cult.
246
00:15:45,025 --> 00:15:46,525
The cult of Storsh.
247
00:15:46,527 --> 00:15:49,295
You're living in
the Tabula Building? Why?
248
00:15:49,297 --> 00:15:51,464
Great location,
it's close to freeways.
249
00:15:51,466 --> 00:15:54,267
Moving on. Meegan Nordheim.
250
00:15:54,269 --> 00:15:58,036
You all know her, star
of the reality show Meal Ticket,
251
00:15:58,038 --> 00:15:59,972
stands to inherit
half a billion dollars
252
00:15:59,974 --> 00:16:02,974
from insecticide king,
Armund Nordheim,
253
00:16:02,976 --> 00:16:06,344
who is currently 96 years old
254
00:16:06,346 --> 00:16:08,381
and counting.
255
00:16:08,383 --> 00:16:10,882
And she is now
running for congress
256
00:16:10,884 --> 00:16:12,917
because that's a thing now.
257
00:16:12,919 --> 00:16:14,552
The woman's a monster.
258
00:16:14,554 --> 00:16:16,555
Yeah. She wants an increase
in kill shelters.
259
00:16:16,557 --> 00:16:18,623
I mean, who campaigns
on killing puppies?
260
00:16:18,625 --> 00:16:21,060
She's retained us at the rate of
50,000 a month.
261
00:16:21,062 --> 00:16:23,296
- She has my full support.
- Our country needs her.
262
00:16:23,298 --> 00:16:25,297
Yeah, well, she was up
in the polls as of last night,
263
00:16:25,299 --> 00:16:27,465
but all that's gonna change
because this morning
264
00:16:27,467 --> 00:16:31,403
the Los Angeles Tatler ran
this series of paparazzi photos
265
00:16:31,405 --> 00:16:34,640
showing Ms. Nordheim
enjoying the company
266
00:16:34,642 --> 00:16:39,612
of 20-year-old personal trainer
slash actor, Dake Wharton.
267
00:16:39,614 --> 00:16:42,848
- Oh, my God.
- Is that a squash?
268
00:16:42,850 --> 00:16:45,350
Look, this one's easy. It's a
classic redirect.
269
00:16:45,352 --> 00:16:47,552
She repents, goes to church
every Sunday,
270
00:16:47,554 --> 00:16:51,089
does a couple of guest sermons,
talks about rebirth through God.
271
00:16:51,091 --> 00:16:52,624
Somethin' there. Tony.
272
00:16:52,626 --> 00:16:53,892
I mean, I say,
we blame the dude.
273
00:16:53,894 --> 00:16:55,795
Nordheim
was manipulated
274
00:16:55,797 --> 00:16:59,864
by some Hollywood pretty boy
who preys on middle-aged women
275
00:16:59,866 --> 00:17:01,767
in order to extort money
for sex.
276
00:17:01,769 --> 00:17:03,572
Okay, she is the victim here.
277
00:17:05,940 --> 00:17:10,508
- Claire?
- Uh... Um...
278
00:17:13,013 --> 00:17:14,814
When I was in eight grade
279
00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:18,651
Ben Barnes, he drew private
parts on my notebook,
280
00:17:18,653 --> 00:17:20,619
but I-I put stickers
over top of them
281
00:17:20,621 --> 00:17:21,953
and I turned them into unicorn.
282
00:17:21,955 --> 00:17:24,458
I actually still have it,
it's kinda cool.
283
00:17:30,030 --> 00:17:31,532
Moving on.
284
00:17:47,949 --> 00:17:50,815
- Do you yield?
- No.
285
00:17:50,817 --> 00:17:51,883
W-wh-what's your book?
286
00:17:51,885 --> 00:17:54,053
I'm not, I'm not part of this.
287
00:17:54,055 --> 00:17:55,921
You're not here
to use the bathtub?
288
00:17:55,923 --> 00:17:57,390
No, well, I mean,
I use the bathtub.
289
00:17:57,392 --> 00:17:59,057
- It's my apartment.
- You live here?
290
00:17:59,059 --> 00:18:00,926
That's, that's disgusting.
291
00:18:00,928 --> 00:18:02,795
This is our house.
Me and Claire.
292
00:18:02,797 --> 00:18:03,895
Get out, get out.
293
00:18:17,545 --> 00:18:19,178
Oh, hello, Barry.
294
00:18:19,180 --> 00:18:21,479
Danielle, you're looking well.
295
00:18:21,481 --> 00:18:24,482
Please spare me
the pleasantries.
296
00:18:24,484 --> 00:18:26,084
Do you yield?
297
00:18:26,086 --> 00:18:30,422
I do not!
298
00:18:30,424 --> 00:18:32,658
- What's your book?
- The honorable Robert Perkins.
299
00:18:32,660 --> 00:18:35,494
The book
of the honorable Robert Perkins.
300
00:18:35,496 --> 00:18:38,730
I choose verse 60!
301
00:18:38,732 --> 00:18:40,165
"Despite having shown
302
00:18:40,167 --> 00:18:41,967
no remorse for these brutal
303
00:18:41,969 --> 00:18:45,603
and cold-blooded murders,
it is my regret that the state
304
00:18:45,605 --> 00:18:49,040
must refile these charges
due to improper warrant
305
00:18:49,042 --> 00:18:52,577
for the search and seizure of
evidence relating to the murder
306
00:18:52,579 --> 00:18:54,513
of Ms. Elizabeth Watson!"
307
00:18:54,515 --> 00:18:56,949
- Watkins!
- No!
308
00:18:56,951 --> 00:18:58,551
Watkins!
309
00:18:58,553 --> 00:19:00,585
It's kins! Dammit!
310
00:19:00,587 --> 00:19:04,722
Who knows the book?
I know the book, Barry!
311
00:19:04,724 --> 00:19:06,725
I can tell you this.
312
00:19:06,727 --> 00:19:08,096
This is not over.
313
00:19:09,931 --> 00:19:11,197
Now that is how it's done.
314
00:19:11,199 --> 00:19:12,698
What w-was that?
315
00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:13,932
The challenge,
316
00:19:13,934 --> 00:19:17,603
and next talent.
317
00:19:17,605 --> 00:19:20,738
What I Did Over Spring Break
by Danielle Carter.
318
00:19:20,740 --> 00:19:24,809
"This summer, my mom and
step-dad took us all to Denmark.
319
00:19:24,811 --> 00:19:28,113
We went to Legoland
and it was really cool.
320
00:19:28,115 --> 00:19:31,115
There was a giant dragon
made from Legos
321
00:19:31,117 --> 00:19:34,487
and they serve vanilla pudding
in the cafeteria.
322
00:19:34,489 --> 00:19:37,722
My favorite thing about Legoland
was the hotel.
323
00:19:37,724 --> 00:19:40,226
The bed was made
from giant Legos
324
00:19:40,228 --> 00:19:43,528
and, uh, they serve pancakes
for breakfast.
325
00:19:43,530 --> 00:19:46,097
In conclusion,
Legoland is a very good place
326
00:19:46,099 --> 00:19:48,033
to go for your spring vacation.
327
00:19:48,035 --> 00:19:50,201
I recommend it highly
328
00:19:50,203 --> 00:19:52,738
for friends and family alike."
329
00:19:52,740 --> 00:19:55,173
That's great, that's,
seriously, that's a,
330
00:19:55,175 --> 00:19:57,543
that's a really nice
piece of writing.
331
00:19:57,545 --> 00:19:59,210
Oh, I did... I got an A on it.
332
00:19:59,212 --> 00:20:01,980
- Did you? Oh.
- Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
333
00:20:01,982 --> 00:20:06,751
Oh, well. Time for me to achieve
eternal bliss.
334
00:20:09,789 --> 00:20:12,091
Oh, shit!
335
00:20:12,093 --> 00:20:13,625
I forgot my knife.
Do you have a knife?
336
00:20:13,627 --> 00:20:15,561
- A knife to kill yourself with?
- Yeah, yeah.
337
00:20:15,563 --> 00:20:17,129
Well, I'm not gonna,
I don't want your blood and guts
338
00:20:17,131 --> 00:20:18,631
all over one of my knives.
That's gross.
339
00:20:18,633 --> 00:20:20,132
That's what dishwashers are for.
340
00:20:20,134 --> 00:20:21,566
Then I'm gonna think about what
341
00:20:21,568 --> 00:20:22,834
you did with it
every time I use it.
342
00:20:22,836 --> 00:20:23,936
Well, just put it in
343
00:20:23,938 --> 00:20:25,136
amongst all the other knives
344
00:20:25,138 --> 00:20:26,805
and then
you wouldn't even remember.
345
00:20:26,807 --> 00:20:28,239
Then I-I'm gonna think about
that with all my knives.
346
00:20:28,241 --> 00:20:29,975
Well, th-throw it away then.
347
00:20:29,977 --> 00:20:31,844
So now I'm giving you a knife?
348
00:20:31,846 --> 00:20:34,880
No. Is there anything else
I can provide you with?
349
00:20:34,882 --> 00:20:38,750
Maybe like a spoon
to scoop your eyeballs out
350
00:20:38,752 --> 00:20:41,754
or maybe a cheese grater
to shave off your nipples?
351
00:20:41,756 --> 00:20:44,289
Jesus! I don't appreciate
this kind of talk.
352
00:20:44,291 --> 00:20:46,292
Well, I don't appreciate
a complete stranger
353
00:20:46,294 --> 00:20:50,194
doing a suicide
in my bathtub. Ah!
354
00:20:50,196 --> 00:20:52,131
We haven't unpacked
the knives yet.
355
00:20:52,133 --> 00:20:55,167
But you do have a screwdriver!
356
00:20:55,169 --> 00:20:58,202
No! No!
357
00:20:59,839 --> 00:21:03,741
Stop it! Claire! Help! Help me!
358
00:21:05,112 --> 00:21:06,844
- Oh, God!
- Oh!
359
00:21:06,846 --> 00:21:08,646
- Oh, God.
- Oh!
360
00:21:08,648 --> 00:21:10,915
What the fudge? You stabbed me!
361
00:21:12,252 --> 00:21:14,652
Oh, my God!
362
00:21:14,654 --> 00:21:16,988
- Oh, right in the spine.
- Oh, my God!
363
00:21:16,990 --> 00:21:18,289
Why did you shove her
like that?
364
00:21:18,291 --> 00:21:20,859
- She was attacking you!
- No, she was...
365
00:21:20,861 --> 00:21:22,694
She was trying to kill herself!
She's a cult member.
366
00:21:24,765 --> 00:21:26,164
Stop screaming!
367
00:21:26,166 --> 00:21:27,165
Ah! So loud!
368
00:21:27,167 --> 00:21:28,734
Stop screaming!
369
00:21:37,612 --> 00:21:39,681
- Oh, God.
- Ah!
370
00:21:40,914 --> 00:21:43,382
He's never gonna believe us.
371
00:21:43,384 --> 00:21:47,186
- Who?
- Th-that Detective Cartwright.
372
00:21:47,188 --> 00:21:48,621
- He's never gonna believe us.
- Why?
373
00:21:48,623 --> 00:21:50,154
- Why wouldn't he believe us?
- Uh...
374
00:21:50,156 --> 00:21:52,658
- Uh, look around.
- I mean...
375
00:21:52,660 --> 00:21:55,294
The screwdriver in her back and
there's blood on the wall and...
376
00:21:55,296 --> 00:21:57,895
- Oh, my God! You're right!
- Oh, God!
377
00:21:57,897 --> 00:22:00,265
You're right!
What, what are we gonna do?
378
00:22:00,267 --> 00:22:01,734
- Tell us what to do, Claire!
- I don't know.
379
00:22:01,736 --> 00:22:02,901
- Tell us what to do!
- I don't know!
380
00:22:02,903 --> 00:22:03,969
Just let me think, let me think,
381
00:22:03,971 --> 00:22:05,339
let me think, please.
382
00:22:11,412 --> 00:22:12,846
Change the story.
383
00:22:18,853 --> 00:22:21,319
This is how we found her.
384
00:22:21,321 --> 00:22:24,288
Yeah, she totally committed
self-murder in the bathtub.
385
00:22:24,290 --> 00:22:29,128
She stabbed herself in the back?
386
00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:31,796
I know. Right?
387
00:22:31,798 --> 00:22:34,298
This is the sloppiest tub death
I've ever seen.
388
00:22:34,300 --> 00:22:36,101
Yeah, 'cause how many times
do you get to practice
389
00:22:36,103 --> 00:22:38,303
your own suicide?
390
00:22:38,305 --> 00:22:40,271
Yes, that's actually
a good point.
391
00:22:40,273 --> 00:22:41,974
- 'Cause he gets, he gets...
- Just in one shot.
392
00:22:41,976 --> 00:22:43,042
Yeah.
393
00:22:46,313 --> 00:22:49,213
Here comes Wallace on the
comedy bus five minutes late.
394
00:22:49,215 --> 00:22:50,382
That's how humor works.
395
00:22:50,384 --> 00:22:51,917
It's an involuntary reaction
396
00:22:51,919 --> 00:22:52,918
when you find something funny.
397
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:54,286
You can't fake it after you hear
398
00:22:54,288 --> 00:22:56,625
two people laughing, you child.
399
00:23:05,432 --> 00:23:07,900
You've been unpacking.
400
00:23:07,902 --> 00:23:10,401
You kids planning on staying?
401
00:23:10,403 --> 00:23:12,403
Yeah, uh, you know,
it's a great location,
402
00:23:12,405 --> 00:23:14,773
it's close to freeways.
403
00:23:14,775 --> 00:23:17,276
Really?
404
00:23:17,278 --> 00:23:20,011
Y-you know, that really shows
some backbone.
405
00:23:20,013 --> 00:23:23,915
To be honest, a lot of the
people just leave right away.
406
00:23:23,917 --> 00:23:25,883
That's good.
Y-you're gonna like it.
407
00:23:25,885 --> 00:23:27,419
There is a, um...
408
00:23:27,421 --> 00:23:30,889
There is a nice pizza place
about three blocks up
409
00:23:30,891 --> 00:23:32,290
called Schneider's
410
00:23:32,292 --> 00:23:35,094
and they have a two-for-one deal
411
00:23:35,096 --> 00:23:38,029
where you get a can of Pepsi
for free on weekdays.
412
00:23:38,031 --> 00:23:40,065
I don't know if you guys, uh,
413
00:23:40,067 --> 00:23:43,035
like pizza. Everybody does.
414
00:23:43,037 --> 00:23:45,738
- O-oh.
- Oh, you...
415
00:23:45,740 --> 00:23:49,007
Yeah, I... Well, we...
I have to, I have to work.
416
00:23:49,009 --> 00:23:51,176
I don't know
why you're telling me that.
417
00:23:51,178 --> 00:23:52,911
I have work, too.
Everyone has work.
418
00:23:52,913 --> 00:23:55,279
That's... Uh, why are you
telling me you have work?
419
00:23:55,281 --> 00:23:56,949
- Is it non sequitur?
- Oh, no, I didn't mean...
420
00:23:56,951 --> 00:23:59,418
'Cause I wasn't asking you guys
to hang out with me.
421
00:23:59,420 --> 00:24:01,152
- I'm a police officer.
- Oh, of course.
422
00:24:01,154 --> 00:24:03,488
I'm a detective. I, I work.
423
00:24:03,490 --> 00:24:05,090
Oh, no, I didn't mean...
424
00:24:05,092 --> 00:24:07,125
The job's frankly all I got.
425
00:24:07,127 --> 00:24:10,828
It's, uh... Which is probably
why I caught Storsh.
426
00:24:10,830 --> 00:24:12,463
He did not get away from me.
427
00:24:12,465 --> 00:24:15,767
He got away from a department
with its head up its ass.
428
00:24:15,769 --> 00:24:19,036
I was not the one
asleep at the switch.
429
00:24:19,038 --> 00:24:21,440
You know,
this Storsh character,
430
00:24:21,442 --> 00:24:24,910
i-it's like, a lot of the stuff
in this book makes sense.
431
00:24:24,912 --> 00:24:26,545
You know, I mean,
some of it's crazy, obviously,
432
00:24:26,547 --> 00:24:29,914
but some of it isn't.
Like, okay, for example...
433
00:24:29,916 --> 00:24:32,551
One of the things is being
the best you you can be.
434
00:24:32,553 --> 00:24:33,951
Well, I don't see
anything wrong with being
435
00:24:33,953 --> 00:24:35,086
the best you I can be.
436
00:24:35,088 --> 00:24:37,224
No, the best you you can be.
437
00:24:38,526 --> 00:24:40,258
That's what I said.
438
00:24:40,260 --> 00:24:41,994
Okay. Um...
439
00:24:41,996 --> 00:24:43,562
For example,
here's another really good one.
440
00:24:43,564 --> 00:24:45,363
Uh... Oh, here. Listen to this.
441
00:24:45,365 --> 00:24:48,299
"When one liberates oneself from
the shackles of overthought,
442
00:24:48,301 --> 00:24:50,134
life can truly be free.
443
00:24:50,136 --> 00:24:52,571
Open yourself to your inner will
and close the door
444
00:24:52,573 --> 00:24:54,873
on the addiction
to outside approval."
445
00:24:54,875 --> 00:24:58,844
I mean, this is me at work.
I totally relate to this.
446
00:24:58,846 --> 00:25:00,912
Like, I'm always worried about
what other people are thinking.
447
00:25:00,914 --> 00:25:02,146
I don't even know
what I'm thinking.
448
00:25:02,148 --> 00:25:04,218
This stuff really makes sense.
449
00:25:07,188 --> 00:25:08,987
You know, I'm not smart
like you are, Claire.
450
00:25:08,989 --> 00:25:10,823
Oh, Paul.
451
00:25:10,825 --> 00:25:14,293
But I don't have to be smart
because I've got you.
452
00:25:14,295 --> 00:25:17,129
And-and now that we're casting
off the shackles of overthought,
453
00:25:17,131 --> 00:25:19,398
I swear my most deepest swear
454
00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:21,333
that I'm gonna get a job,
455
00:25:21,335 --> 00:25:23,936
like, as soon as possible.
456
00:25:23,938 --> 00:25:26,604
New city, new Paul, new us.
457
00:25:26,606 --> 00:25:28,907
Oh, Paul.
458
00:25:28,909 --> 00:25:30,942
- I believe in you.
- Oh.
459
00:25:30,944 --> 00:25:32,547
- I believe in you.
- Yeah?
460
00:25:33,614 --> 00:25:36,448
Oh, I love you, my Claire.
461
00:25:45,459 --> 00:25:48,360
Claire, Claire, hi.
So we just got the call.
462
00:25:48,362 --> 00:25:50,429
Nordheim is coming in to see
what we have for the campaign.
463
00:25:50,431 --> 00:25:51,900
- Now?
- Yeah, now.
464
00:25:53,567 --> 00:25:56,003
Ah.
465
00:26:03,611 --> 00:26:06,548
We weren't expecting
Mr. Nordheim.
466
00:26:09,482 --> 00:26:11,251
Oh...
467
00:26:15,489 --> 00:26:18,957
Well, we were thinking,
468
00:26:18,959 --> 00:26:23,027
what if you were to repent.
469
00:26:23,029 --> 00:26:24,196
The religious angle.
470
00:26:24,198 --> 00:26:26,931
- You find Jesus.
- I'm Jewish.
471
00:26:26,933 --> 00:26:30,204
Obviously you did a workup on me
and you already know that.
472
00:26:32,239 --> 00:26:35,039
Okay.
473
00:26:35,041 --> 00:26:36,540
We put a story in the paper
474
00:26:36,542 --> 00:26:39,611
that the young man
with whom you had relations
475
00:26:39,613 --> 00:26:42,480
is actually a con artist
476
00:26:42,482 --> 00:26:44,586
preying on...
477
00:26:49,289 --> 00:26:50,490
Preying on?
478
00:26:51,625 --> 00:26:53,161
Praying...
479
00:26:55,229 --> 00:26:57,465
Tony, why don't you take
this one since it's your idea?
480
00:26:59,133 --> 00:27:02,534
Sure. Uh...
481
00:27:02,536 --> 00:27:07,338
Um, uh... I see sort of like a,
uh,
482
00:27:07,340 --> 00:27:09,540
a basketball player,
but instead of legs,
483
00:27:09,542 --> 00:27:13,612
um, it's got tang threads.
So, like a ro...
484
00:27:13,614 --> 00:27:15,516
Ro...
485
00:27:17,984 --> 00:27:20,651
Okay, I'm gonna speak now.
486
00:27:20,653 --> 00:27:24,523
I am not impressed
with any of this.
487
00:27:24,525 --> 00:27:26,458
And if this is all you have,
I'm going to be
488
00:27:26,460 --> 00:27:30,331
very, very, very disappointed.
489
00:27:35,068 --> 00:27:37,004
I have an idea.
490
00:27:51,518 --> 00:27:54,419
What exactly would
you say your strengths are?
491
00:27:54,421 --> 00:27:58,055
Well, uh, first and foremost,
I am a people-pleaser.
492
00:27:58,057 --> 00:28:00,158
- Pe-people like me.
- Well, I don't like you.
493
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:03,295
And I have a hard time
seeing how anyone would.
494
00:28:03,297 --> 00:28:04,997
Please, just, sir,
just give me a chance.
495
00:28:04,999 --> 00:28:07,599
Do you even know
what it is we do here?
496
00:28:07,601 --> 00:28:10,602
Y-y-you guys design
roller coasters, right?
497
00:28:10,604 --> 00:28:12,437
Well, you managed
to get that right.
498
00:28:12,439 --> 00:28:15,673
How many years of mechanical
engineering do you have?
499
00:28:15,675 --> 00:28:17,642
No, no, no, no. I'm sorry.
Listen.
500
00:28:17,644 --> 00:28:19,443
Listen, I really need this job.
501
00:28:19,445 --> 00:28:21,179
My girlfriend said that
I-I have to get my job thing
502
00:28:21,181 --> 00:28:22,314
sorted or we can never
get married.
503
00:28:22,316 --> 00:28:24,482
- Uh! Your girlfriend?
- Yeah.
504
00:28:24,484 --> 00:28:27,385
You're in here wasting my time
because of your girlfriend?
505
00:28:27,387 --> 00:28:28,487
- No, no, please...
- I'm shocked...
506
00:28:28,489 --> 00:28:30,654
You even have a girlfriend.
507
00:28:30,656 --> 00:28:32,157
I wouldn't be surprised
if she leaves you
508
00:28:32,159 --> 00:28:33,758
by the end of the week because
509
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:36,661
there is no job for you here
510
00:28:36,663 --> 00:28:38,967
or anywhere in this city.
511
00:28:40,233 --> 00:28:42,433
- No...
- Now get out of my office!
512
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:03,590
Hi, Paul. Why so glumy, chummy?
513
00:29:09,596 --> 00:29:11,465
I can't get a job.
514
00:29:12,833 --> 00:29:16,067
No one will hire me.
515
00:29:16,069 --> 00:29:18,402
Uh, not after what happened
in Ohio.
516
00:29:18,404 --> 00:29:20,607
What's the what in Ohio, huh?
517
00:29:24,845 --> 00:29:26,411
Okay.
518
00:29:26,413 --> 00:29:28,646
Did you know
that in 33% of marriages
519
00:29:28,648 --> 00:29:30,248
somebody commits infidelity?
520
00:29:30,250 --> 00:29:33,151
And that's only the ones
who admitted, so...
521
00:29:33,153 --> 00:29:36,287
So you were caught having
a little fun on the side.
522
00:29:36,289 --> 00:29:39,290
I'm sure every woman in America
would understand
523
00:29:39,292 --> 00:29:41,759
if you just put it into context.
Yeah.
524
00:29:41,761 --> 00:29:44,662
What context is that?
525
00:29:44,664 --> 00:29:46,331
Let's break the shackles
of approval
526
00:29:46,333 --> 00:29:50,602
and show everyone
it's okay to be the real you.
527
00:29:50,604 --> 00:29:52,703
I made this thing. It's a...
528
00:29:52,705 --> 00:29:54,639
Really, a-all you need to do is
529
00:29:54,641 --> 00:29:58,343
show these, these two pictures
side-by-side
530
00:29:58,345 --> 00:30:00,615
and then simply ask...
531
00:30:03,250 --> 00:30:05,385
"Come on. Wouldn't you?"
532
00:30:09,522 --> 00:30:12,626
"Come on. Wouldn't you?"
533
00:30:13,826 --> 00:30:16,364
Come on. Wouldn't you?
534
00:30:19,900 --> 00:30:21,436
Come on.
535
00:30:23,604 --> 00:30:27,141
Wouldn't you?
I mean...
536
00:30:28,174 --> 00:30:30,241
Come on. Come on!
537
00:30:34,448 --> 00:30:36,280
Come on. Wouldn't you?
538
00:30:36,282 --> 00:30:38,749
- Come on. Wouldn't you?
- Come on. Wouldn't you?
539
00:30:38,751 --> 00:30:40,352
- Come on. Wouldn't you?
- Come on. Wouldn't you?
540
00:30:40,354 --> 00:30:42,754
- Come on. Wouldn't you?
- Come on. Wouldn't you?
541
00:30:42,756 --> 00:30:44,655
♪ Come on wouldn't you? Hey ♪
542
00:30:44,657 --> 00:30:46,458
♪ Come on wouldn't you? Hey ♪
543
00:30:46,460 --> 00:30:47,926
♪ Come on wouldn't you?
Oh yeah ♪
544
00:30:47,928 --> 00:30:49,693
♪ Come on wouldn't you?
Everybody ♪
545
00:30:49,695 --> 00:30:51,363
♪ Come on wouldn't you? Oh ♪
546
00:30:51,365 --> 00:30:52,831
♪ Come on wouldn't you?
Hey... ♪
547
00:30:52,833 --> 00:30:54,332
Pearl, where have you been
hiding this girl?
548
00:30:54,334 --> 00:30:55,933
I love her!
549
00:30:55,935 --> 00:30:58,338
♪ Oh come on wouldn't you?
Hey ♪
550
00:31:01,875 --> 00:31:04,508
This one time last year...
551
00:31:04,510 --> 00:31:07,946
I stayed up really late to watch
The Storage Wars marathon.
552
00:31:07,948 --> 00:31:10,649
It's a really awesome show
because I like stuff
553
00:31:10,651 --> 00:31:12,950
about storage units.
554
00:31:12,952 --> 00:31:14,853
Anyway, I was gonna go to bed,
but then I remembered
555
00:31:14,855 --> 00:31:16,520
that Claire had asked me
to do the laundry,
556
00:31:16,522 --> 00:31:17,922
so I stayed up
for the rest of the night
557
00:31:17,924 --> 00:31:20,191
and did the laundry.
558
00:31:20,193 --> 00:31:22,326
Um, but then, then,
559
00:31:22,328 --> 00:31:23,628
the-the dryer didn't finish
in time,
560
00:31:23,630 --> 00:31:25,263
and I had to go to my job
561
00:31:25,265 --> 00:31:28,266
at the water filtration plant.
562
00:31:28,268 --> 00:31:31,835
And so I just wore
my uniform damp.
563
00:31:31,837 --> 00:31:36,309
But then on my walk to work, um,
I got really, really cold.
564
00:31:38,244 --> 00:31:41,513
And I couldn't stop shivering,
so I stopped at the gas station
565
00:31:41,515 --> 00:31:43,981
and got a Mountain Dew.
566
00:31:43,983 --> 00:31:47,285
And when I got to work, I tried
to heat the Mountain,
567
00:31:47,287 --> 00:31:50,555
Mountain Dew up on a hot plate.
568
00:31:50,557 --> 00:31:52,757
But then the plastic melted
569
00:31:52,759 --> 00:31:56,694
and-and, and then the melted
plastic and the Mountain Dew
570
00:31:56,696 --> 00:31:57,996
got all over my hands
571
00:31:57,998 --> 00:32:01,999
and I knocked over
a can of turpentine
572
00:32:02,001 --> 00:32:03,701
and that mixed
with some oldie peanuts
573
00:32:03,703 --> 00:32:06,403
and then that dripped
into the filtration fluids.
574
00:32:06,405 --> 00:32:10,775
And then the,
the melty Mountain-Dewie plastic
575
00:32:10,777 --> 00:32:13,812
and the, and the mold
and the turpentine
576
00:32:13,814 --> 00:32:16,815
all mixed together and made
some w-weird chemical reaction
577
00:32:16,817 --> 00:32:21,489
and-and then that... that got
into the town's water supply.
578
00:32:23,289 --> 00:32:26,927
And the entire town
lost their hair.
579
00:32:29,395 --> 00:32:30,828
All their hair.
580
00:32:30,830 --> 00:32:33,931
Their arms and their legs
and their eyebrows.
581
00:32:33,933 --> 00:32:38,737
And then... and then
about half the town,
582
00:32:38,739 --> 00:32:40,971
let's say, about 80,000 people,
583
00:32:40,973 --> 00:32:43,941
got rage madness and they
started foaming at the mouth
584
00:32:43,943 --> 00:32:46,311
and attacking each other
for no reason.
585
00:32:46,313 --> 00:32:49,480
And then the whole town
became a war zone.
586
00:32:49,482 --> 00:32:52,517
And we had to stay inside,
but everybody got so hungry.
587
00:32:52,519 --> 00:32:54,619
But then the rage people
stole all the food
588
00:32:54,621 --> 00:32:57,288
and they, they hid it
in a used tire yard.
589
00:32:57,290 --> 00:33:01,625
And they built this massive fort
out of used tires.
590
00:33:01,627 --> 00:33:04,528
It was like a beehive,
and then they stayed in,
591
00:33:04,530 --> 00:33:06,430
in the tire hive
and they wouldn't come out.
592
00:33:06,432 --> 00:33:07,899
And so then all the
593
00:33:07,901 --> 00:33:09,767
then the normal people
burned down the tire hive.
594
00:33:09,769 --> 00:33:12,703
But then the fire,
the fire burned for months
595
00:33:12,705 --> 00:33:15,806
because it was just
millions of used tires.
596
00:33:15,808 --> 00:33:17,842
And then
we all had to go to the woods
597
00:33:17,844 --> 00:33:19,544
and hunt for animals.
598
00:33:19,546 --> 00:33:21,546
But it was the summer
and, and it was so hot
599
00:33:21,548 --> 00:33:24,382
and we all took off
all of our, our clothes
600
00:33:24,384 --> 00:33:26,484
and then we ran out of bullets.
601
00:33:26,486 --> 00:33:29,754
And so there's just a bunch
of hairless naked people
602
00:33:29,756 --> 00:33:32,957
running around the woods,
hunting for deer
603
00:33:32,959 --> 00:33:36,460
and raccoons and squirrels
with our bare hands.
604
00:33:36,462 --> 00:33:39,463
And then, t-then everyone
605
00:33:39,465 --> 00:33:42,801
got really hungry again
'cause we ran out of animals.
606
00:33:42,803 --> 00:33:47,338
And then... then you couldn't
tell the normal people
607
00:33:47,340 --> 00:33:48,940
from the rage people
608
00:33:48,942 --> 00:33:51,809
and-and you couldn't tell
who was who.
609
00:33:51,811 --> 00:33:53,510
And then a militia came
from another state
610
00:33:53,512 --> 00:33:55,546
and they called us all
s-skinners
611
00:33:55,548 --> 00:33:58,415
and th-they hunted us for sport.
612
00:33:58,417 --> 00:34:01,585
And then the National Guard
came to fight the militia
613
00:34:01,587 --> 00:34:04,122
and then the government
sent in the army
614
00:34:04,124 --> 00:34:06,658
to rescue us all
615
00:34:06,660 --> 00:34:09,693
and then when it was all done...
616
00:34:09,695 --> 00:34:12,532
they told me I couldn't go back
to Ohio anymore.
617
00:34:18,572 --> 00:34:20,472
Oh, Paul.
618
00:34:20,474 --> 00:34:22,874
Sounds like you've been
on quite the journey.
619
00:34:22,876 --> 00:34:24,608
But your true journey of bliss
620
00:34:24,610 --> 00:34:26,677
found
on the instantaneous eternity
621
00:34:26,679 --> 00:34:29,613
only begins
when you change your story.
622
00:34:29,615 --> 00:34:32,583
It's time to loose the Os
in Ohio
623
00:34:32,585 --> 00:34:35,019
and say hi to the new Paul,
624
00:34:35,021 --> 00:34:39,057
a Paul who's his own boss,
a Paul who answers to Paul.
625
00:34:39,059 --> 00:34:40,691
To-to me?
626
00:34:40,693 --> 00:34:42,394
It's like
the Book Of Stories says.
627
00:34:42,396 --> 00:34:45,697
The only thing you've to worry
about is what you think.
628
00:34:45,699 --> 00:34:48,532
If there's no job for you,
make your own job.
629
00:34:48,534 --> 00:34:52,472
Be like me. Be free.
Free like a bird, bird.
630
00:34:53,407 --> 00:34:56,608
Free? Like a bird, bird?
631
00:34:57,844 --> 00:34:59,847
Like a bird, bird.
632
00:35:00,780 --> 00:35:01,916
Yeah.
633
00:35:09,021 --> 00:35:10,521
Hey-hey!
634
00:35:10,523 --> 00:35:13,124
- Hey!
- I had the best day.
635
00:35:13,126 --> 00:35:14,958
Me, too.
I had, I have huge news.
636
00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:16,161
Oh, okay. You first.
637
00:35:16,163 --> 00:35:17,896
So I-I slammed the door
638
00:35:17,898 --> 00:35:19,430
on the jackals of over-thoughts.
639
00:35:19,432 --> 00:35:20,831
Just like you said,
I've been so worried
640
00:35:20,833 --> 00:35:22,133
about what everyone else thinks
I should be
641
00:35:22,135 --> 00:35:24,135
that I forgot what I want to be.
642
00:35:24,137 --> 00:35:26,003
Oh, well, that-that's amazing.
What do you wanna be, Paul?
643
00:35:26,005 --> 00:35:28,206
A bird housemaker.
644
00:35:28,208 --> 00:35:30,775
I make birdhouses now.
645
00:35:30,777 --> 00:35:32,844
Come, come, come.
646
00:35:32,846 --> 00:35:35,546
Oh, wow!
You, you made all of these?
647
00:35:35,548 --> 00:35:37,014
Yeah, I'm in the zone.
648
00:35:37,016 --> 00:35:39,016
Look, so this one's
a little pool house, right?
649
00:35:39,018 --> 00:35:40,885
And it's got a little lounge
chair, a little changing room
650
00:35:40,887 --> 00:35:42,720
where the birds can change
out of their red clothes.
651
00:35:42,722 --> 00:35:44,456
A simple
mother-daughter apartment
652
00:35:44,458 --> 00:35:46,090
for when mom gets really old
and she could die,
653
00:35:46,092 --> 00:35:47,691
she could die at any moment.
654
00:35:47,693 --> 00:35:48,860
There's a little
mechanical chair
655
00:35:48,862 --> 00:35:50,228
that goes up and down the
stairs.
656
00:35:50,230 --> 00:35:51,862
This one is modelled
after Chuck E. Cheese,
657
00:35:51,864 --> 00:35:53,597
but I call it Chick E. Cheese.
658
00:35:53,599 --> 00:35:55,233
And there's a little bosspit.
659
00:35:55,235 --> 00:35:57,202
And there's a fake band and then
this one is a honeymoon suite,
660
00:35:57,204 --> 00:36:01,472
it's got a, um, a heart-shaped
bed for getting it on.
661
00:36:01,474 --> 00:36:05,776
Oh, look.
Claire, I almost forgot.
662
00:36:05,778 --> 00:36:08,512
This one's for you.
663
00:36:08,514 --> 00:36:11,081
It's an exact replica scale
664
00:36:11,083 --> 00:36:13,217
of the Full House living room,
season one.
665
00:36:13,219 --> 00:36:16,753
Paul, this is, this is amazing!
666
00:36:16,755 --> 00:36:18,121
You don't have to say that.
667
00:36:18,123 --> 00:36:21,728
No, Paul. No.
I-I'm really proud of you.
668
00:36:23,096 --> 00:36:24,864
- Mm.
- Thank you.
669
00:36:26,932 --> 00:36:28,499
- Tell me about your day!
- Oh...
670
00:36:28,501 --> 00:36:30,200
I can't believe.
I've been so focused on, I...
671
00:36:30,202 --> 00:36:31,802
What about your day?
Take the mic.
672
00:36:31,804 --> 00:36:33,905
Okay.
673
00:36:33,907 --> 00:36:35,907
- Is it on? Okay.
- You...
674
00:36:35,909 --> 00:36:37,675
Um, so, yeah, we had this,
the surprise visit
675
00:36:37,677 --> 00:36:39,978
from a client at work and
everyone was, like, stressed out
676
00:36:39,980 --> 00:36:42,713
and losing their minds, but I
kept my cool and I saved the day
677
00:36:42,715 --> 00:36:44,715
with a stunning pitch
when everyone else had nothing.
678
00:36:44,717 --> 00:36:46,284
- And Pearl even shook my hand.
- That hand?
679
00:36:46,286 --> 00:36:47,519
- Yeah!
- All right!
680
00:36:47,521 --> 00:36:48,920
I knew you could do it!
681
00:36:48,922 --> 00:36:50,755
You know, and I-I just applied
the teachings
682
00:36:50,757 --> 00:36:52,222
of Storsh
and it actually worked.
683
00:36:52,224 --> 00:36:54,691
- Oh, my God. I love Storsh.
- Yeah, I know. Me, too.
684
00:36:54,693 --> 00:36:56,927
I'm so jacked up right now,
I can sell anything.
685
00:36:56,929 --> 00:36:59,264
- Well, sell me a birdhouse.
- How about a pun?
686
00:36:59,266 --> 00:37:02,066
Like, uh, Paul's birdhouse,
when nature Pauls.
687
00:37:02,068 --> 00:37:03,568
That's brilliant!
688
00:37:03,570 --> 00:37:05,036
Okay, here's another...
Uh, uh...
689
00:37:05,038 --> 00:37:07,871
This birdhouse
will never Paul out of a tree.
690
00:37:07,873 --> 00:37:09,673
You gotta slow down. I gotta
write this down. Seriously. I...
691
00:37:09,675 --> 00:37:11,642
Oh, no, no. Don't even sweat it.
I got a million of 'em.
692
00:37:11,644 --> 00:37:13,711
Okay, how about this one?
Uh, uh, Paul's Boyd...
693
00:37:13,713 --> 00:37:15,780
Paul Boyd's birdie
birdhouse building.
694
00:37:15,782 --> 00:37:17,916
- Ah! You know what your name is?
- What?
695
00:37:17,918 --> 00:37:19,249
- Little Ms. Ideas. Yes.
- No.
696
00:37:19,251 --> 00:37:20,552
- You're amazing.
- No, you're amazing.
697
00:37:20,554 --> 00:37:21,719
- We're amazing.
- Yeah.
698
00:37:21,721 --> 00:37:23,054
You know what this means,
Claire?
699
00:37:23,056 --> 00:37:24,923
We're finally
getting our stuff sorted.
700
00:37:24,925 --> 00:37:26,060
Yeah.
701
00:37:42,242 --> 00:37:44,342
It was the '90s,
702
00:37:44,344 --> 00:37:47,744
a different time,
a simpler time.
703
00:37:47,746 --> 00:37:51,081
When a man committed a crime,
you kicked in the door
704
00:37:51,083 --> 00:37:53,721
and worried about paperwork
later.
705
00:37:55,688 --> 00:37:57,655
But like all good times,
706
00:37:57,657 --> 00:37:59,824
that time was a time
707
00:37:59,826 --> 00:38:02,695
whose time has come to an end.
708
00:38:04,965 --> 00:38:08,166
Then on April 2nd,
1997,
709
00:38:08,168 --> 00:38:11,936
I came face-to-face
with pure evil.
710
00:38:11,938 --> 00:38:13,637
Reginald Euclid Storsh,
711
00:38:13,639 --> 00:38:15,907
incited over
two dozen innocent victims
712
00:38:15,909 --> 00:38:17,675
to self-murder.
713
00:38:17,677 --> 00:38:20,612
An adversary so brilliant,
so cunning
714
00:38:20,614 --> 00:38:22,146
that to merely be
in his presence
715
00:38:22,148 --> 00:38:23,880
was to risk total mental
716
00:38:23,882 --> 00:38:26,617
and spiritual annihilation.
717
00:38:26,619 --> 00:38:29,320
"Detective Cartwright,
did you have a warrant
718
00:38:29,322 --> 00:38:31,121
for these proceedings?"
719
00:38:31,123 --> 00:38:34,691
"A warrant? Hell, no,
Your Honor, he's guilty."
720
00:38:34,693 --> 00:38:37,662
"Well, I don't care
how ridiculous or stupid
721
00:38:37,664 --> 00:38:40,365
or unfair it is,
I declare a mistrial.
722
00:38:40,367 --> 00:38:42,233
Case dismissed."
723
00:38:42,235 --> 00:38:44,769
"Your Honor, no!"
724
00:38:44,771 --> 00:38:47,037
So I made my life's goal up
725
00:38:47,039 --> 00:38:49,773
to not give him
a moment's rest.
726
00:38:49,775 --> 00:38:51,909
I dogged him like a dog.
727
00:38:51,911 --> 00:38:55,012
But six months into it,
he committed suicide
728
00:38:55,014 --> 00:38:56,748
in a bath tub.
729
00:38:56,750 --> 00:38:59,083
Then his followers started
committing suicide
730
00:38:59,085 --> 00:39:00,184
in the same tub.
731
00:39:00,186 --> 00:39:02,220
Cultist after cultist
732
00:39:02,222 --> 00:39:04,655
dove into a porcelain nightmare
733
00:39:04,657 --> 00:39:06,958
of blood and death.
734
00:39:06,960 --> 00:39:09,394
The chief
still has the case open.
735
00:39:09,396 --> 00:39:11,128
And guess who has to clean up
736
00:39:11,130 --> 00:39:13,231
every time one of these morons
737
00:39:13,233 --> 00:39:15,932
commits a see-pa-coo
in the tub?
738
00:39:15,934 --> 00:39:18,903
That's right. Me. Cartwright.
739
00:39:18,905 --> 00:39:20,908
The last good cop.
740
00:39:36,456 --> 00:39:39,023
Go, go, go, go, go, go.
Go, go, go.
741
00:39:57,811 --> 00:40:00,010
- Hey.
- Mm!
742
00:40:00,012 --> 00:40:03,014
Oh... Oh, come on, man!
743
00:40:03,016 --> 00:40:05,383
- What?
- I booked the tub!
744
00:40:05,385 --> 00:40:07,818
It's been on the schedule
for months.
745
00:40:07,820 --> 00:40:10,354
Okay. Just do it.
746
00:40:10,356 --> 00:40:13,891
Three-way challenge.
Do you yield?
747
00:40:13,893 --> 00:40:15,862
I-I, I don't, I don't know.
Do we?
748
00:40:19,364 --> 00:40:20,865
The invocation.
749
00:40:20,867 --> 00:40:22,733
"In order to get
to instantaneous eternity,
750
00:40:22,735 --> 00:40:24,068
you must pass through
the gateway
751
00:40:24,070 --> 00:40:25,939
chosen by the Holy Storsh."
752
00:40:30,076 --> 00:40:34,177
What? Oh, my God!
You're initiates, aren't you?
753
00:40:34,179 --> 00:40:36,113
Uh, initiates. Yeah.
754
00:40:36,115 --> 00:40:38,449
Actually, do you, do you
think you could teach us
755
00:40:38,451 --> 00:40:40,820
some initiate stuff?
756
00:40:43,989 --> 00:40:47,157
Well, maybe I'll break the rules
this one time.
757
00:40:48,894 --> 00:40:50,461
- Awesome.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
758
00:40:50,463 --> 00:40:54,398
All right, um, you know,
you two guys really lucked out.
759
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:57,901
It's not every day
that two initiates
760
00:40:57,903 --> 00:41:00,338
get taught their invocation
761
00:41:00,340 --> 00:41:02,472
by a level-six instructor.
762
00:41:02,474 --> 00:41:03,907
- Level six?
- Yeah.
763
00:41:03,909 --> 00:41:05,208
Is that, uh,
is that a good level?
764
00:41:05,210 --> 00:41:07,010
Uh, there's only 11 levels
765
00:41:07,012 --> 00:41:10,046
and I'm level six,
which is basically level seven,
766
00:41:10,048 --> 00:41:11,481
so really I'm an eight.
767
00:41:11,483 --> 00:41:14,818
So, yeah,
I'd say it's pretty damn good.
768
00:41:14,820 --> 00:41:17,854
And I specialize
in invocation training.
769
00:41:17,856 --> 00:41:20,224
You could say
I'm kind of a big deal
770
00:41:20,226 --> 00:41:22,025
down at East Side Bethel,
you know?
771
00:41:22,027 --> 00:41:23,394
- Huh. Mm!
- Okay.
772
00:41:23,396 --> 00:41:25,362
- Uh, so lie down.
- All right.
773
00:41:25,364 --> 00:41:27,097
Here.
774
00:41:27,099 --> 00:41:29,934
Okay. Like the...
775
00:41:29,936 --> 00:41:34,505
Uh, okay, um, scooch down
towards me a little.
776
00:41:34,507 --> 00:41:36,974
Okay, now go left, uh,
just a little bit.
777
00:41:36,976 --> 00:41:38,976
Okay. Actually, scooch back up
just a couple of...
778
00:41:38,978 --> 00:41:41,179
Yeah, okay, that's good.
And come over to your right.
779
00:41:41,181 --> 00:41:42,479
Okay, you're moving faster,
so, so just...
780
00:41:42,481 --> 00:41:43,481
- Yeah. And then...
- Me? Oh. Okay.
781
00:41:43,483 --> 00:41:45,249
You come down just a touch.
782
00:41:45,251 --> 00:41:46,253
Perfect.
783
00:41:47,987 --> 00:41:51,222
Actually, you know what?
Go, go back a little bit.
784
00:41:51,224 --> 00:41:55,325
That's it. That's it! Nice.
785
00:41:55,327 --> 00:41:57,528
This guy is awesome. I mean,
he's basically a level eight.
786
00:41:57,530 --> 00:41:59,500
I know.
787
00:42:03,068 --> 00:42:05,001
Okay.
788
00:42:05,003 --> 00:42:08,141
Now look up to the light.
789
00:42:10,376 --> 00:42:12,309
That's life.
790
00:42:12,311 --> 00:42:16,079
It's bright, it's inviting,
it's warm.
791
00:42:16,081 --> 00:42:18,449
That's light. That's life.
792
00:42:18,451 --> 00:42:21,221
And this is death.
793
00:42:25,057 --> 00:42:26,826
What do you see?
794
00:42:28,193 --> 00:42:31,229
I-I can still see
an outline.
795
00:42:31,231 --> 00:42:33,063
But it's fading.
796
00:42:33,065 --> 00:42:34,365
Exactly.
797
00:42:34,367 --> 00:42:37,467
See, normally when someone dies,
798
00:42:37,469 --> 00:42:41,005
there's a little bit
of afterglow that lingers.
799
00:42:41,007 --> 00:42:43,507
But then unfortunately,
it just disperses
800
00:42:43,509 --> 00:42:45,309
into the ether.
801
00:42:45,311 --> 00:42:49,246
But thanks to the great Storsh,
802
00:42:49,248 --> 00:42:53,016
his chosen will bask
in the light of eternity.
803
00:42:53,018 --> 00:42:55,619
Just because the magical Storsh
804
00:42:55,621 --> 00:42:58,990
spilled his magical blood
in that bath tub,
805
00:42:58,992 --> 00:43:00,958
the bath tub is magical
806
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:03,661
and will magically hold on
to the afterglow
807
00:43:03,663 --> 00:43:06,396
for all eternity.
808
00:43:06,398 --> 00:43:08,568
All of that in a bath tub?
809
00:43:20,146 --> 00:43:22,583
Would you like to bear witness
to my exodus?
810
00:43:31,958 --> 00:43:35,229
Cyanide. It's quick. Painless.
811
00:43:50,943 --> 00:43:52,976
Well...
812
00:43:52,978 --> 00:43:55,281
I'm sorry, I didn't think
I would get emotional.
813
00:43:57,016 --> 00:44:00,418
You know, you two
are gonna be great followers.
814
00:44:00,420 --> 00:44:02,219
Hm.
815
00:44:02,221 --> 00:44:03,688
I'm gonna tell Storsh about you
816
00:44:03,690 --> 00:44:06,289
when I get to the other side.
817
00:44:06,291 --> 00:44:08,228
That's neat.
818
00:44:10,663 --> 00:44:12,195
Yeah.
819
00:44:12,197 --> 00:44:13,400
Bye.
820
00:44:21,407 --> 00:44:23,210
It's just a sec.
821
00:44:33,485 --> 00:44:34,587
Any second.
822
00:44:47,199 --> 00:44:49,266
- Oh! Oh! Ow! Whoa!
- Oh...
823
00:44:49,268 --> 00:44:51,635
Whoa, wait, hey,
this actually hurts quite a bit.
824
00:44:51,637 --> 00:44:54,037
- Oh, Go... Oh, no!
- Ah! Oh, God!
825
00:44:54,039 --> 00:44:56,206
Oh! Oh, actually,
this hurts quite a lot actually!
826
00:44:56,208 --> 00:44:58,742
- Do you want some water?
- Oh, for the love of Christ!
827
00:44:58,744 --> 00:45:01,244
They're inside of my body,
828
00:45:01,246 --> 00:45:02,713
burning like a thousand suns!
829
00:45:02,715 --> 00:45:04,749
- No! Oh, no!
- I'll go get a first-aid kit!
830
00:45:04,751 --> 00:45:06,784
No! You idiot!
831
00:45:06,786 --> 00:45:09,720
I wanna die! Kill me!
832
00:45:09,722 --> 00:45:11,088
- Kill me!
- Just go!
833
00:45:11,090 --> 00:45:12,155
Oh, my God!
834
00:45:17,262 --> 00:45:19,030
Use this! Use this!
835
00:45:19,032 --> 00:45:20,398
- Me?
- Yes!
836
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:22,099
Oh! Oh!
837
00:45:25,304 --> 00:45:27,438
I am sorry!
838
00:45:28,608 --> 00:45:31,242
What kind of cheap knife
is that?
839
00:45:31,244 --> 00:45:33,043
- We're on a budget, okay?
- No!
840
00:45:33,045 --> 00:45:35,479
Stab harder! Do it!
841
00:45:42,121 --> 00:45:44,220
- Come on!
- No!
842
00:45:44,222 --> 00:45:46,257
Oh! Claire, stop it!
843
00:45:46,259 --> 00:45:49,760
Stop! Claire, no!
844
00:45:49,762 --> 00:45:51,561
We need better killing!
845
00:45:55,635 --> 00:45:58,501
Oh, God! You can't kill me
with that stapler!
846
00:45:58,503 --> 00:46:01,338
- Oh, God! Aah!
- Oh!
847
00:46:01,340 --> 00:46:04,108
You have no idea
how much this hurts!
848
00:46:04,110 --> 00:46:05,543
Plug it in!
849
00:46:08,547 --> 00:46:10,483
Why won't you die?
850
00:46:14,086 --> 00:46:15,853
I gotta get 'em out!
851
00:46:19,759 --> 00:46:20,726
Oh!
852
00:46:30,469 --> 00:46:33,204
Is there something
you wanna tell me, Claire?
853
00:46:33,206 --> 00:46:36,139
Uh, no, I-I don't think so.
854
00:46:36,141 --> 00:46:38,476
You're sure about that?
855
00:46:38,478 --> 00:46:40,414
Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
856
00:46:43,782 --> 00:46:46,150
I get why you would,
but it's not a good idea
857
00:46:46,152 --> 00:46:48,151
to lie to a detective, it's...
858
00:46:48,153 --> 00:46:49,820
I detect.
859
00:46:49,822 --> 00:46:53,557
I get to the bottom of things.
It's my job.
860
00:46:53,559 --> 00:46:55,758
And your job is,
861
00:46:55,760 --> 00:46:58,528
you work in the business.
862
00:46:58,530 --> 00:47:00,463
- The business?
- Yeah.
863
00:47:00,465 --> 00:47:02,666
The ad business? I found out.
864
00:47:02,668 --> 00:47:05,269
You work at Global Creative.
865
00:47:05,271 --> 00:47:08,805
Okay, come on. I-I...
Let me wet my beak.
866
00:47:08,807 --> 00:47:12,342
Do you understand how you could
help a person in my situation?
867
00:47:12,344 --> 00:47:14,445
Just...
868
00:47:14,447 --> 00:47:16,780
Oh, hey! Is this
your screenplay? Cool!
869
00:47:16,782 --> 00:47:19,215
I didn't exactly
pick a title yet, but...
870
00:47:19,217 --> 00:47:22,353
Well, what exactly
do you want me to do with this?
871
00:47:22,355 --> 00:47:24,155
Well, do what you do.
Talk to people.
872
00:47:24,157 --> 00:47:26,891
You must know actors, right?
D-do you know Wesley Snipes?
873
00:47:26,893 --> 00:47:29,226
He's who I always picture
when I'm writing about myself.
874
00:47:29,228 --> 00:47:31,394
Uh, he needs this.
875
00:47:31,396 --> 00:47:35,566
Yeah. Totally. I...
You know, I'll make some calls.
876
00:47:35,568 --> 00:47:37,504
- You're not just saying that?
- No.
877
00:47:40,840 --> 00:47:44,374
I had a feeling about you two.
First two aside.
878
00:47:44,376 --> 00:47:47,778
You know? I know I can
count on my new friends.
879
00:47:47,780 --> 00:47:49,179
And sorry about this all.
880
00:47:49,181 --> 00:47:51,282
Well, I'll mark it down
as the usual...
881
00:47:51,284 --> 00:47:52,950
And give me feedback.
Give me notes.
882
00:47:52,952 --> 00:47:54,888
I-I'm not precious,
I collaborate.
883
00:47:56,389 --> 00:47:57,688
♪ Girl you know ♪♪
884
00:47:57,690 --> 00:47:59,255
Uh...
885
00:48:07,666 --> 00:48:09,666
You know,
I've been thinking.
886
00:48:09,668 --> 00:48:12,570
When those guys first showed up
and were gonna kill themselves
887
00:48:12,572 --> 00:48:15,438
in our bath tub, I was like,
"Okay, t-this is crazy."
888
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:17,641
And then when, you know, the
more we learned about Storsh,
889
00:48:17,643 --> 00:48:19,543
I can see
why these people follow him.
890
00:48:19,545 --> 00:48:21,311
You know, I mean, sure,
it's not for everybody,
891
00:48:21,313 --> 00:48:23,213
but think about what good
he's done for us
892
00:48:23,215 --> 00:48:24,581
and we're not even in his cult.
893
00:48:24,583 --> 00:48:26,583
Well, w-we can't be in a cult.
We're from Ohio.
894
00:48:26,585 --> 00:48:28,251
Yeah, but, you know,
when you think about it,
895
00:48:28,253 --> 00:48:29,820
all religions have good and bad.
896
00:48:29,822 --> 00:48:32,555
So, like, maybe we can just
take the good from Storsh
897
00:48:32,557 --> 00:48:34,391
and, like, apply it
to our own lives.
898
00:48:34,393 --> 00:48:36,260
Like, you know, the other day
when you burned your finger
899
00:48:36,262 --> 00:48:37,894
on the glue gun, and you're
like, "Oh, Jesus H. Christ,"
900
00:48:37,896 --> 00:48:39,429
but, like,
you're not even a Christian.
901
00:48:39,431 --> 00:48:41,532
No, you listen,
I'm totally good with having
902
00:48:41,534 --> 00:48:42,967
a little Storsh in our lives,
I mean, it means
903
00:48:42,969 --> 00:48:44,969
a little more blood
and violence, no biggie.
904
00:48:44,971 --> 00:48:46,836
But that's my point,
you know, these poor souls
905
00:48:46,838 --> 00:48:48,871
work so hard to meet Storsh
in the instantaneous eternity,
906
00:48:48,873 --> 00:48:51,275
but they really have trouble
with the-the, like,
907
00:48:51,277 --> 00:48:52,342
the final commitment, you know?
908
00:48:52,344 --> 00:48:53,376
It's like Cartwright said,
909
00:48:53,378 --> 00:48:54,510
"How many chances do you have
910
00:48:54,512 --> 00:48:55,845
to practice your own suicide?"
911
00:48:55,847 --> 00:48:57,514
- They totally suck at suicide.
- Yeah.
912
00:48:57,516 --> 00:48:59,016
- Yeah.
- So this is what I'm thinking.
913
00:48:59,018 --> 00:49:01,017
You know, it's our apartment,
so what's, what's wrong
914
00:49:01,019 --> 00:49:03,787
with helping our visitors
with a quick, clean transition
915
00:49:03,789 --> 00:49:05,389
into the instantaneous eternity?
916
00:49:05,391 --> 00:49:07,291
Helping our visitors
is the least we can do.
917
00:49:07,293 --> 00:49:09,325
It is the least we can do.
This is our home.
918
00:49:09,327 --> 00:49:12,262
This is our temple.
It's the reason we left Ohio.
919
00:49:12,264 --> 00:49:14,764
To serve the good word
of Storsh.
920
00:49:14,766 --> 00:49:17,434
Reginald E. Storsh, Claire.
I love you.
921
00:49:17,436 --> 00:49:19,836
- Oh.
- I love you.
922
00:49:19,838 --> 00:49:21,775
♪ Ba-ba du-bab du-bab ♪
923
00:49:23,376 --> 00:49:25,312
♪ Ba-ba du-bab du-bab ♪
924
00:49:26,711 --> 00:49:30,447
♪ Bab-ba-rub ba-rub-bab ♪
925
00:49:30,449 --> 00:49:32,048
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
926
00:49:32,050 --> 00:49:33,583
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
927
00:49:33,585 --> 00:49:36,954
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah du-bab ♪
928
00:49:36,956 --> 00:49:38,755
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
929
00:49:38,757 --> 00:49:40,324
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
930
00:49:40,326 --> 00:49:43,459
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah du-bab ♪
931
00:49:43,461 --> 00:49:46,729
♪ Ba-du bab-bab-bab ba-da bah ♪
932
00:49:46,731 --> 00:49:49,867
♪ Ba-du dab-bab
bab-bah du-bah ♪
933
00:49:49,869 --> 00:49:52,436
♪ Ba-du bab-bab bab ba-dap ♪
934
00:49:52,438 --> 00:49:55,875
♪ Bab ba-du ba-du-dap du-dap ♪
935
00:49:57,009 --> 00:49:58,775
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
936
00:49:58,777 --> 00:50:00,510
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
937
00:50:00,512 --> 00:50:03,847
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah du-bab ♪
938
00:50:03,849 --> 00:50:05,648
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
939
00:50:05,650 --> 00:50:07,418
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
940
00:50:07,420 --> 00:50:09,887
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah du-bab ♪
941
00:50:09,889 --> 00:50:13,624
♪ Ba-du bab-bab-bab ba-da bah ♪
942
00:50:13,626 --> 00:50:17,026
♪ Ba-du bab-bab-bab ba-da bah ♪
943
00:50:17,028 --> 00:50:19,362
♪ Ba-du dab-bab-bab ba-dap ♪
944
00:50:19,364 --> 00:50:22,965
♪ Bab ba-da-du ba-du-da du-da ♪
945
00:50:31,844 --> 00:50:34,510
♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪
946
00:50:34,512 --> 00:50:36,447
♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪
947
00:50:36,449 --> 00:50:37,748
♪ Ba-da du-ba ba-da ♪
948
00:50:37,750 --> 00:50:39,615
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
949
00:50:39,617 --> 00:50:41,385
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
950
00:50:41,387 --> 00:50:44,722
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah du-bab ♪
951
00:50:44,724 --> 00:50:46,557
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
952
00:50:46,559 --> 00:50:48,092
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah-du ♪
953
00:50:48,094 --> 00:50:51,095
♪ Ba-du-lu bab-bah du-bab ♪
954
00:50:51,097 --> 00:50:54,530
♪ Ba-du bab-bab-bab ba-da bah ♪
955
00:50:54,532 --> 00:50:57,767
♪ Ba-du bab-bab-bab ba-da bah ♪
956
00:50:57,769 --> 00:51:00,604
♪ Ba-du bab-bab-bab ba-dap ♪
957
00:51:00,606 --> 00:51:02,106
♪ Bab ba-da-da bab ♪
958
00:51:05,077 --> 00:51:06,880
♪ Ba-ba du-bab du-dab ♪
959
00:51:08,514 --> 00:51:10,617
♪ Ba-ba du-bab du-dab ♪
960
00:51:11,951 --> 00:51:15,719
♪ Ba-ba du-bab du-dab ♪
961
00:51:15,721 --> 00:51:19,992
♪ Bab ba-dap ba-dap-bab da ♪♪
962
00:51:23,094 --> 00:51:25,996
It's weird how they all have
some kind of red dye
963
00:51:25,998 --> 00:51:27,697
on their lips now.
964
00:51:27,699 --> 00:51:30,467
Yeah. It's totally weird, right?
965
00:51:30,469 --> 00:51:32,068
You know, maybe it's a new part
of their ritual.
966
00:51:32,070 --> 00:51:34,804
Hm. Worthless jerks.
967
00:51:34,806 --> 00:51:37,039
Your mama must be
real proud, pal.
968
00:51:37,041 --> 00:51:39,346
Stone, Wallace,
get rid of this chump.
969
00:51:40,579 --> 00:51:42,945
- So, uh, Claire?
- Yeah?
970
00:51:42,947 --> 00:51:45,182
Any luck with Wesley?
971
00:51:45,184 --> 00:51:47,818
- I'm sorry?
- My script? Wesley Snipes?
972
00:51:47,820 --> 00:51:49,952
Oh! Yeah. Uh, actually, yeah.
973
00:51:49,954 --> 00:51:52,722
I, uh, called,
I called his agent
974
00:51:52,724 --> 00:51:55,858
and Fred, uh,
Fred Burm-Burm,
975
00:51:55,860 --> 00:51:57,860
Fred Burminton,
and he said, uh,
976
00:51:57,862 --> 00:52:00,130
that he was gonna give it
to Wesley and that he was gonna
977
00:52:00,132 --> 00:52:01,798
take a look at it.
978
00:52:01,800 --> 00:52:03,068
You're lying.
979
00:52:04,469 --> 00:52:06,903
- No.
- You gotta be lying!
980
00:52:08,873 --> 00:52:11,074
He said those words?
Fred Burminton said that?
981
00:52:11,076 --> 00:52:13,043
Uh, yeah, absolutely. He...
982
00:52:13,045 --> 00:52:15,012
- You, I told you about...
- She told...
983
00:52:15,014 --> 00:52:16,947
I... He, he definitely did.
984
00:52:16,949 --> 00:52:18,849
Well, here we go!
985
00:52:20,119 --> 00:52:22,119
- Yeah.
- This is it!
986
00:52:22,121 --> 00:52:23,887
Oh, uh, uh, tell him, uh,
987
00:52:23,889 --> 00:52:25,889
I'm gonna take the thing
about the super soldiers out.
988
00:52:25,891 --> 00:52:28,057
Uh, my sister's boyfriend
is a bloom operator
989
00:52:28,059 --> 00:52:30,193
on General Hospital
and he said, um,
990
00:52:30,195 --> 00:52:32,028
that that technically
makes it sci-fi,
991
00:52:32,030 --> 00:52:34,030
which is an issue
in Germany, uh,
992
00:52:34,032 --> 00:52:36,099
and I wanted this to play
internationally.
993
00:52:36,101 --> 00:52:38,469
I can't believe
I just said that.
994
00:52:38,471 --> 00:52:40,737
Okay, so then,
no super soldiers.
995
00:52:40,739 --> 00:52:41,771
Got it.
996
00:52:41,773 --> 00:52:43,139
Claire, you are amazing.
997
00:52:43,141 --> 00:52:45,809
- Oh, oh...
- Oh...
998
00:52:48,246 --> 00:52:51,048
Thank you.
999
00:52:51,050 --> 00:52:53,987
- Oh, that's... Tha-that happens.
- Hey...
1000
00:53:07,032 --> 00:53:08,731
Claire.
1001
00:53:08,733 --> 00:53:10,900
Ms. Nordheim.
What are you doing here?
1002
00:53:10,902 --> 00:53:12,735
I just came
from a fundraising dinner.
1003
00:53:12,737 --> 00:53:14,905
We made a record raise.
1004
00:53:14,907 --> 00:53:16,840
You managed to turn my whole
campaign around, Claire.
1005
00:53:16,842 --> 00:53:18,644
I wanted to thank you.
1006
00:53:19,911 --> 00:53:22,979
Oh. Wow,
that is so sweet of you.
1007
00:53:22,981 --> 00:53:26,650
I'm gonna have to start
drinking wine.
1008
00:53:26,652 --> 00:53:29,653
Well, well, well.
What a beauty.
1009
00:53:29,655 --> 00:53:31,655
I am impressed, Claire.
Is it yours?
1010
00:53:31,657 --> 00:53:34,891
Oh. Yeah, the birdhouse?
My, uh, my boyfriend makes 'em.
1011
00:53:34,893 --> 00:53:36,995
Hm. Well.
1012
00:53:38,630 --> 00:53:39,896
I'll tell you what, Claire.
1013
00:53:39,898 --> 00:53:41,298
I am in the market
1014
00:53:41,300 --> 00:53:42,932
of furry birdhouse.
1015
00:53:42,934 --> 00:53:44,867
I would love to meet the artist.
1016
00:53:44,869 --> 00:53:47,170
Oh, I'm-I'm sure
Paul would be thrilled.
1017
00:53:47,172 --> 00:53:50,007
I-I would, I'd be happy
to make the connection for you.
1018
00:53:50,009 --> 00:53:51,974
I... We'll have to do that
sometime.
1019
00:53:51,976 --> 00:53:53,245
How about now?
1020
00:54:02,288 --> 00:54:03,755
Oh, uh...
1021
00:54:05,190 --> 00:54:07,126
We're still moving in, so...
1022
00:54:08,960 --> 00:54:12,262
Can I, uh, offer you anything?
1023
00:54:12,264 --> 00:54:15,902
- Are these the birdhouses?
- Oh, yeah, th-those are them.
1024
00:54:17,268 --> 00:54:20,170
Where's the boyfriend?
He around?
1025
00:54:20,172 --> 00:54:22,139
He must be out, which is...
1026
00:54:22,141 --> 00:54:23,706
You know, and he pretty much
never goes out,
1027
00:54:23,708 --> 00:54:25,141
so it's kinda weird.
1028
00:54:25,143 --> 00:54:27,010
- I'm gonna paint one of those.
- Oh.
1029
00:54:27,012 --> 00:54:30,817
I've always wanted to dive
head first into the arts.
1030
00:54:32,117 --> 00:54:33,086
Hm.
1031
00:54:36,889 --> 00:54:39,990
I like you, Claire.
Frankly, I see myself in you.
1032
00:54:39,992 --> 00:54:41,992
And I'm sure my upbringing
wasn't that different from you
1033
00:54:41,994 --> 00:54:43,796
other than, you know...
1034
00:54:45,931 --> 00:54:47,296
I look like this.
1035
00:54:47,298 --> 00:54:49,231
And I realized pretty quickly,
that as a woman,
1036
00:54:49,233 --> 00:54:51,934
you have tremendous power.
1037
00:54:51,936 --> 00:54:53,103
Have you ever felt
the kind of power
1038
00:54:53,105 --> 00:54:54,204
that I'm talking about, Claire?
1039
00:54:54,206 --> 00:54:55,639
Oh, you know, o-once I played
1040
00:54:55,641 --> 00:54:57,340
the Powerball
and I won five dollars.
1041
00:54:57,342 --> 00:55:00,644
Yeah, that was pretty cool.
1042
00:55:00,646 --> 00:55:02,945
So I figured if these men are
gonna have their way with me,
1043
00:55:02,947 --> 00:55:05,148
then I'm gonna have my way
with them.
1044
00:55:05,150 --> 00:55:08,784
Armund was 82
when I married him.
1045
00:55:08,786 --> 00:55:12,389
Today he is 96.
1046
00:55:12,391 --> 00:55:15,224
Turns out, the old guy
is built like a machine.
1047
00:55:15,226 --> 00:55:17,260
And he just keeps going
1048
00:55:17,262 --> 00:55:20,162
and going and going and going
1049
00:55:20,164 --> 00:55:23,666
and going and going and going
and going and going!
1050
00:55:23,668 --> 00:55:26,670
Point is, Claire,
this young boyfriend of yours
1051
00:55:26,672 --> 00:55:29,139
who builds birdhouses,
I am sure he's just peachy.
1052
00:55:29,141 --> 00:55:32,943
But you have got to take the
power that is rightfully yours.
1053
00:55:32,945 --> 00:55:35,077
You've got to milk this world
for everything
1054
00:55:35,079 --> 00:55:36,646
that it has to give.
1055
00:55:36,648 --> 00:55:40,684
You know, t-that must be Paul.
1056
00:55:40,686 --> 00:55:42,084
Oh.
1057
00:55:42,086 --> 00:55:44,755
Oh, my gosh. Mr. Nordheim!
1058
00:55:44,757 --> 00:55:47,356
Did-did you climb up
all of those stairs?
1059
00:55:47,358 --> 00:55:49,059
Are you okay? Here.
1060
00:55:49,061 --> 00:55:51,795
D-does he need, like,
a defibrillator o-or something?
1061
00:55:51,797 --> 00:55:53,195
Uh, should I get him some water?
1062
00:55:53,197 --> 00:55:54,697
He's already had his water
today.
1063
00:55:54,699 --> 00:55:56,666
Claire, let him go.
Claire, he's fine.
1064
00:55:56,668 --> 00:55:58,101
What I am trying to tell you is
1065
00:55:58,103 --> 00:56:00,202
that I have come here
to liberate you
1066
00:56:00,204 --> 00:56:02,104
from the prison
1067
00:56:02,106 --> 00:56:03,740
that you call love.
1068
00:56:03,742 --> 00:56:06,175
And, yes,
it will be painful at first,
1069
00:56:06,177 --> 00:56:08,010
but eventually
you're gonna thank me.
1070
00:56:08,012 --> 00:56:11,782
And I can't say that I'm not
going to enjoy liberating you
1071
00:56:11,784 --> 00:56:13,450
by liberating Paul
1072
00:56:13,452 --> 00:56:16,253
the way I liberated
that boy in the gym
1073
00:56:16,255 --> 00:56:19,722
over and over
and over and over...
1074
00:56:19,724 --> 00:56:21,023
Oh, my God!
1075
00:56:21,025 --> 00:56:23,325
Oh, oh... Oh, my God! Ho!
1076
00:56:23,327 --> 00:56:25,632
I'll go get the first-aid kit.
1077
00:56:36,842 --> 00:56:38,909
Oh, I'm free. I'm free.
1078
00:56:38,911 --> 00:56:40,976
I am free. I am finally free!
1079
00:56:40,978 --> 00:56:42,479
Oh, my God. I'm finally free.
1080
00:56:42,481 --> 00:56:44,748
Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, God, thank you.
1081
00:56:44,750 --> 00:56:47,083
I so deserved this. Thank you!
1082
00:56:47,085 --> 00:56:49,151
Thank you, thank you,
thank you...
1083
00:56:49,153 --> 00:56:51,054
- Paul.
- Oh, my gosh!
1084
00:56:51,056 --> 00:56:52,456
You're Meegan Nordheim.
1085
00:56:52,458 --> 00:56:55,758
Paul, I want you to liberate me.
1086
00:56:55,760 --> 00:56:57,260
Liberate me now.
1087
00:56:57,262 --> 00:56:59,329
- Uh, is Claire home?
- Forget Claire!
1088
00:56:59,331 --> 00:57:01,932
There is no Claire. There is
only you and there is me.
1089
00:57:01,934 --> 00:57:03,900
- Okay. I'll get the juice.
- No, no, no...
1090
00:57:03,902 --> 00:57:05,769
Paul, come to me.
Paul, I want my bliss now.
1091
00:57:05,771 --> 00:57:07,436
Please don't make me wait for
it. Don't make me wait, Paul.
1092
00:57:07,438 --> 00:57:09,305
Please, please, please, I want
my bliss. Please, Paul, Paul...
1093
00:57:09,307 --> 00:57:10,507
Paul, please, now.
1094
00:57:10,509 --> 00:57:13,275
- Oh... Okay, o-okay, okay.
- Okay.
1095
00:57:24,088 --> 00:57:27,124
Oh, no. Paul, what did you do?
1096
00:57:27,126 --> 00:57:29,860
- I saved her.
- What? Why?
1097
00:57:29,862 --> 00:57:31,994
She was a visitor. You said
that we had to help them.
1098
00:57:31,996 --> 00:57:33,863
No...
Children of Storsh.
1099
00:57:33,865 --> 00:57:35,164
Well, how was I supposed
to know that?
1100
00:57:35,166 --> 00:57:37,800
It's called logic, Paul!
1101
00:57:37,802 --> 00:57:39,503
- Oh, shoot!
- My God!
1102
00:57:39,505 --> 00:57:42,271
Oh, no, no, no, no.
1103
00:57:42,273 --> 00:57:44,307
You let her paint
the country house?
1104
00:57:44,309 --> 00:57:46,909
I'd hardly call that
a country house.
1105
00:57:46,911 --> 00:57:48,378
No, no, no, no, no.
1106
00:57:48,380 --> 00:57:49,912
Country house, Boyd house,
1107
00:57:49,914 --> 00:57:51,347
complete with a little
front-porch swing
1108
00:57:51,349 --> 00:57:53,450
and a bird-watching tower
for watching birds.
1109
00:57:53,452 --> 00:57:55,952
Looks more like a fire station.
1110
00:57:55,954 --> 00:57:58,121
What kind of fire station
has a porch swing?
1111
00:57:58,123 --> 00:58:00,055
Forget about the birdhouse,
Paul.
1112
00:58:00,057 --> 00:58:02,092
We gotta deal with this now,
okay?
1113
00:58:02,094 --> 00:58:04,059
No, no, no. She's-she's...
It's gonna be fine.
1114
00:58:04,061 --> 00:58:06,362
I mean, she's still alive.
Everything's, everything's okay.
1115
00:58:06,364 --> 00:58:08,063
She's gonna tell everyone
what you did
1116
00:58:08,065 --> 00:58:09,166
and you're gonna go to jail!
1117
00:58:09,168 --> 00:58:11,104
How can you be so stupid?
1118
00:58:14,840 --> 00:58:15,807
Paul!
1119
00:58:21,813 --> 00:58:23,546
I'm sorry, Ms. Nordheim.
1120
00:58:23,548 --> 00:58:26,016
Not the fire station.
1121
00:58:26,018 --> 00:58:28,121
It's a country house.
1122
00:58:44,436 --> 00:58:46,372
Cartwright's on his way.
1123
00:58:48,206 --> 00:58:50,840
What are you gonna tell him?
1124
00:58:50,842 --> 00:58:52,110
A story.
1125
00:58:54,146 --> 00:58:55,912
A love story
1126
00:58:55,914 --> 00:58:58,148
about a woman who married a man
1127
00:58:58,150 --> 00:59:00,115
for all of the right reasons,
1128
00:59:00,117 --> 00:59:02,418
and not for his money
and-and not for his power,
1129
00:59:02,420 --> 00:59:05,988
but because she saw
who he really was.
1130
00:59:05,990 --> 00:59:07,990
A man who needed her
1131
00:59:07,992 --> 00:59:10,894
more than she needed him.
1132
00:59:10,896 --> 00:59:13,028
It started out
as a pure kind of love,
1133
00:59:13,030 --> 00:59:16,932
but it quickly became
something else.
1134
00:59:16,934 --> 00:59:20,873
An obligation,
not for her, but for him.
1135
00:59:22,407 --> 00:59:25,976
For her it was never
a romantic kind of love.
1136
00:59:25,978 --> 00:59:28,612
It was a friend kind of love.
1137
00:59:28,614 --> 00:59:31,347
She knew that if she left him,
1138
00:59:31,349 --> 00:59:33,883
it would destroy him.
1139
00:59:33,885 --> 00:59:37,887
So she stayed by his side
and hoped that he would realize
1140
00:59:37,889 --> 00:59:40,326
that he bet on the wrong horse.
1141
00:59:41,626 --> 00:59:43,429
But he never did.
1142
00:59:44,929 --> 00:59:48,033
So she was trapped...
1143
00:59:49,601 --> 00:59:51,537
until she found Storsh.
1144
00:59:53,405 --> 00:59:55,505
What she never found
in her marriage,
1145
00:59:55,507 --> 00:59:59,108
she found in the open arms
of Storsh and his followers,
1146
00:59:59,110 --> 01:00:01,311
seekers
of the instantaneous eternity,
1147
01:00:01,313 --> 01:00:03,345
that one brief moment of bliss
1148
01:00:03,347 --> 01:00:06,115
that can go on for forever.
1149
01:00:06,117 --> 01:00:08,952
Armund was so distraught,
so devastated
1150
01:00:08,954 --> 01:00:11,253
by the loss of his one true love
1151
01:00:11,255 --> 01:00:13,490
that he sought to follow her.
1152
01:00:13,492 --> 01:00:15,090
He'd rather die in her arms
1153
01:00:15,092 --> 01:00:17,362
than live without her
for one more day.
1154
01:00:19,998 --> 01:00:21,630
Wow.
1155
01:00:21,632 --> 01:00:23,435
Gosh, darn it, Claire.
1156
01:00:25,237 --> 01:00:27,505
I have to say something to you
right now.
1157
01:00:29,206 --> 01:00:32,641
You-you know what?
We had a problem, right?
1158
01:00:32,643 --> 01:00:34,209
And what do we do?
1159
01:00:34,211 --> 01:00:36,012
- We sorted it.
- Uh-huh.
1160
01:00:36,014 --> 01:00:39,014
This problem is sorted.
It's sorted.
1161
01:00:39,016 --> 01:00:40,717
And it's not just this problem,
it's everything, our...
1162
01:00:40,719 --> 01:00:42,552
The-the apartment,
your job, my job.
1163
01:00:42,554 --> 01:00:46,358
We... we are, are sorted.
1164
01:00:51,963 --> 01:00:54,063
What are you doing?
1165
01:00:54,065 --> 01:00:55,166
Listen...
1166
01:00:57,068 --> 01:01:01,503
Claire Annabelle McKenty,
will you, will you marry me?
1167
01:01:01,505 --> 01:01:04,374
Y-you're doing this
right now?
1168
01:01:04,376 --> 01:01:06,742
No, I know, I know I said
I wouldn't ask again
1169
01:01:06,744 --> 01:01:08,378
until we got our-our stuff
figured out.
1170
01:01:08,380 --> 01:01:11,213
But guess what? We did! We did!
1171
01:01:11,215 --> 01:01:12,414
I wanna be with you forever,
Claire.
1172
01:01:12,416 --> 01:01:15,517
I want...
I need you to marry me.
1173
01:01:15,519 --> 01:01:18,157
- Oh, well, okay...
- Okay.
1174
01:01:19,557 --> 01:01:23,028
We need to do the thing...
right now.
1175
01:01:27,132 --> 01:01:29,164
♪ Do you like me? I suppose ♪
1176
01:01:29,166 --> 01:01:30,766
♪ Draw me like a French girl
Jack and Rose ♪
1177
01:01:30,768 --> 01:01:32,702
♪ Sun goes up
and you milk that cow ♪
1178
01:01:32,704 --> 01:01:34,537
♪ Slap that udder
on the big bad cow ♪
1179
01:01:34,539 --> 01:01:36,539
♪ Watch that cow
eat all that grass ♪
1180
01:01:36,541 --> 01:01:38,675
♪ Sometimes a donkey's
called an ass ♪
1181
01:01:38,677 --> 01:01:40,543
♪ Me a question and I'll tell
you what I'm thinking ♪
1182
01:01:40,545 --> 01:01:42,512
♪ Every night
Uncle Gary goes drinking ♪
1183
01:01:42,514 --> 01:01:44,414
♪ Oh hey you hear the news? ♪
1184
01:01:44,416 --> 01:01:46,349
♪ Mom and dad
went on a cruise ♪
1185
01:01:46,351 --> 01:01:48,385
♪ Mom had come
but the group was smelling ♪
1186
01:01:48,387 --> 01:01:50,353
♪ Mom came back
with a baby in her belly ♪
1187
01:01:50,355 --> 01:01:52,389
♪ Spaghetti and meatballs
parmesan ♪♪
1188
01:01:52,391 --> 01:01:54,190
Spaghetti and meatballs!
1189
01:01:57,461 --> 01:02:01,664
It's okay. We're so close.
Doesn't matter.
1190
01:02:01,666 --> 01:02:03,602
We're married now.
1191
01:02:07,039 --> 01:02:09,141
I love you so much.
1192
01:02:30,528 --> 01:02:32,662
♪ Gum drops ♪
1193
01:02:32,664 --> 01:02:36,769
♪ On Christmas Day ♪♪
1194
01:02:40,204 --> 01:02:43,273
- Hey, smiley!
- Hey, smiley!
1195
01:02:43,275 --> 01:02:45,340
I didn't hear you come in.
1196
01:02:45,342 --> 01:02:47,677
D-did we get any visitors?
1197
01:02:47,679 --> 01:02:51,150
Oh, no.
No, it's been pretty quiet.
1198
01:02:54,286 --> 01:02:56,786
Y-you know, I was thinking,
maybe we could go for a walk
1199
01:02:56,788 --> 01:02:58,588
in the neighborhood
and then when we get back,
1200
01:02:58,590 --> 01:03:01,590
we could play some shrabes.
1201
01:03:01,592 --> 01:03:06,595
I was kinda hoping for like
a Storshy kind of evening.
1202
01:03:06,597 --> 01:03:08,067
So...
1203
01:03:29,521 --> 01:03:30,653
Go for Cartwright.
1204
01:03:30,655 --> 01:03:33,590
Detective, hey. It's Claire.
1205
01:03:33,592 --> 01:03:35,758
Claire, got any news for me?
1206
01:03:35,760 --> 01:03:39,461
News? Oh! Yeah! You know, I...
1207
01:03:39,463 --> 01:03:41,430
Uh, I, uh,
heard from Snipes
1208
01:03:41,432 --> 01:03:43,766
and he loved the script, so...
1209
01:03:43,768 --> 01:03:46,302
You're kidding. Are you kidding?
1210
01:03:46,304 --> 01:03:49,606
No, I'm, I wouldn't, I wouldn't
kid with you, Boyce-boy.
1211
01:03:49,608 --> 01:03:51,907
Uh, uh, please hold one...
1212
01:03:59,518 --> 01:04:02,552
Yeah!
1213
01:04:02,554 --> 01:04:05,155
Yeah! Yeah!
1214
01:04:05,157 --> 01:04:08,258
Yeah!
1215
01:04:19,371 --> 01:04:21,371
Ah, that's such a good news.
1216
01:04:21,373 --> 01:04:22,905
Claire,
this is huge.
1217
01:04:22,907 --> 01:04:25,307
I should, I gotta put in notice
with my captain, right?
1218
01:04:25,309 --> 01:04:27,276
Because I can't work active
cases if I'm gonna be on set.
1219
01:04:27,278 --> 01:04:29,378
Is he gonna want
a producer credit? 'Cause I...
1220
01:04:29,380 --> 01:04:31,313
Between you and me,
he doesn't deserve anything
1221
01:04:31,315 --> 01:04:33,950
more than
associate executive producer.
1222
01:04:33,952 --> 01:04:35,584
Hey, uh, question for you.
1223
01:04:35,586 --> 01:04:37,420
Anything, Claire, shoot.
1224
01:04:37,422 --> 01:04:39,354
We haven't had a cult member
in a while
1225
01:04:39,356 --> 01:04:41,824
and I just wondered, like,
is there some sort of, like,
1226
01:04:41,826 --> 01:04:43,626
Storsh holiday
that we're not aware of?
1227
01:04:43,628 --> 01:04:46,528
Like a,
like a suicide Yom Kippur?
1228
01:04:46,530 --> 01:04:50,200
Oh, well, it hasn't been
that long, it's three days ago.
1229
01:04:50,202 --> 01:04:52,235
Oh, yeah, okay, cool,
no, it just seems like
1230
01:04:52,237 --> 01:04:53,769
there should've been one by now.
1231
01:04:53,771 --> 01:04:55,972
Actually, uh, a few years ago,
there was a dry spell
1232
01:04:55,974 --> 01:04:57,773
that lasted six months.
1233
01:04:57,775 --> 01:05:00,943
I mean, I thought it was over,
1234
01:05:00,945 --> 01:05:03,412
but then
it all started up again.
1235
01:05:03,414 --> 01:05:07,383
Uh, eventually, Claire,
they always come back.
1236
01:05:07,385 --> 01:05:09,485
That's what you gotta understand
about these people.
1237
01:05:09,487 --> 01:05:12,588
If it helps, think of yourself
as switching places
1238
01:05:12,590 --> 01:05:14,891
with me narratively.
1239
01:05:14,893 --> 01:05:16,959
You know, you're becoming
kind of the lonely beat cop
1240
01:05:16,961 --> 01:05:19,394
in the wasteland of death,
1241
01:05:19,396 --> 01:05:21,764
I'm becoming
the Hollywood screenwriter.
1242
01:05:21,766 --> 01:05:24,867
Hey, Claire, do you think
1243
01:05:24,869 --> 01:05:27,003
that a guy like me
1244
01:05:27,005 --> 01:05:30,572
would be able to pen a romcom,
1245
01:05:30,574 --> 01:05:32,242
a romantic comedy?
1246
01:05:32,244 --> 01:05:34,443
I had this story,
you know what they say,
1247
01:05:34,445 --> 01:05:35,612
"Write what you know."
1248
01:05:35,614 --> 01:05:38,514
My ex-wife, she went to Ireland
1249
01:05:38,516 --> 01:05:41,251
o-once and she just never
came back,
1250
01:05:41,253 --> 01:05:43,720
and e-eventually we divorced
through the mail
1251
01:05:43,722 --> 01:05:45,755
and it was, it was kinda
like a Lake House
1252
01:05:45,757 --> 01:05:47,956
meets, um, Lady And The Tramp.
1253
01:05:47,958 --> 01:05:51,394
Because we were really
better friends
1254
01:05:51,396 --> 01:05:54,796
through letters that when
w-when we were sharing a bed.
1255
01:05:54,798 --> 01:05:57,467
And then I eventually,
you know, started talking
1256
01:05:57,469 --> 01:05:59,635
to her new husband.
1257
01:05:59,637 --> 01:06:01,304
Um, he's a firefighter.
1258
01:06:01,306 --> 01:06:03,773
Uh, I mean, and Irish
firefighter, you gotta...
1259
01:06:03,775 --> 01:06:05,407
It's pretty cool. Like, like...
1260
01:06:05,409 --> 01:06:07,309
As-as much as I don't wanna
admit it, like,
1261
01:06:07,311 --> 01:06:09,412
that's pretty much
a manlier occupation.
1262
01:06:09,414 --> 01:06:12,481
I mean, an the Irish already
fight everything.
1263
01:06:12,483 --> 01:06:14,349
This guy fights fire.
1264
01:06:14,351 --> 01:06:16,753
Uh, I-I-I just
thought, like,
1265
01:06:16,755 --> 01:06:18,787
kind of a,
like a triangle thing
1266
01:06:18,789 --> 01:06:21,791
with like
Matthew McConaughey, uh,
1267
01:06:21,793 --> 01:06:24,327
Kate Hudson and maybe
like Wesley Snipes.
1268
01:06:24,329 --> 01:06:27,063
If he gets one on this one...
1269
01:06:38,842 --> 01:06:41,411
Okay, so listen,
Nordheim wasn't in the cult.
1270
01:06:41,413 --> 01:06:42,945
- But we saved her anyway.
- Well, she needed to be saved.
1271
01:06:42,947 --> 01:06:44,880
- She wanted to kill puppies.
- Exactly.
1272
01:06:44,882 --> 01:06:46,581
So before we were saving people
1273
01:06:46,583 --> 01:06:48,517
into the instantaneous eternity
who wanted to be saved,
1274
01:06:48,519 --> 01:06:50,385
but maybe we save people
who need to be saved
1275
01:06:50,387 --> 01:06:51,653
that don't even know
they need to be saved.
1276
01:06:51,655 --> 01:06:52,688
That's great, like murderers
1277
01:06:52,690 --> 01:06:54,456
and rapists or celebrity chefs.
1278
01:06:54,458 --> 01:06:57,262
Exactly. Okay. Let's do this.
1279
01:07:40,672 --> 01:07:44,106
It's a, um, new anti-depressant.
1280
01:07:44,108 --> 01:07:46,141
We have to sell people
on getting happy
1281
01:07:46,143 --> 01:07:48,811
because apparantly
hopelessness and despair
1282
01:07:48,813 --> 01:07:51,046
are currently trending.
1283
01:07:51,048 --> 01:07:53,786
Mr. Carl, I've got this.
1284
01:07:58,856 --> 01:08:01,893
The only way to achieve
complete happiness is...
1285
01:08:03,728 --> 01:08:07,396
by inviting the father and
savior Storsh in to your heart.
1286
01:08:07,398 --> 01:08:09,432
Now, I-I know, I know you're all
looking at me
1287
01:08:09,434 --> 01:08:11,767
like you're a little skeptical,
but believe me, I was too,
1288
01:08:11,769 --> 01:08:13,668
but, you know, you just,
you just gotta go for it.
1289
01:08:13,670 --> 01:08:15,771
So, I-I'd love
for you guys to join.
1290
01:08:15,773 --> 01:08:17,773
You know, just a bunch
of like-minded people
1291
01:08:17,775 --> 01:08:20,045
who wanna be as happy
as they can be.
1292
01:08:21,813 --> 01:08:24,013
That's all very interesting.
1293
01:08:24,015 --> 01:08:26,585
And you've given us a lot
to think about.
1294
01:08:30,788 --> 01:08:33,188
Stupid legs, stupid legs.
1295
01:08:33,190 --> 01:08:34,956
Stupid rigor-mortis legs!
1296
01:08:34,958 --> 01:08:37,192
Oh! Fuck!
1297
01:08:37,194 --> 01:08:40,495
Claire! Claire!
Thanks God you're home.
1298
01:08:40,497 --> 01:08:43,465
Something terrible has happened.
They shut down my website.
1299
01:08:43,467 --> 01:08:44,733
And my credit card was declined.
1300
01:08:44,735 --> 01:08:47,135
I was just so busy
making birdhouses
1301
01:08:47,137 --> 01:08:50,005
that I forgot to pay
and then the bank was so far
1302
01:08:50,007 --> 01:08:52,208
that I didn't wanna walk
and I spent all my money
1303
01:08:52,210 --> 01:08:54,076
on skittles and wood
and thanks God...
1304
01:08:54,078 --> 01:08:56,879
Thanks God for you, Claire,
thanks God for you.
1305
01:08:56,881 --> 01:08:58,714
Can you swap me 200 bucks?
1306
01:08:58,716 --> 01:09:01,717
They fired me, Paul!
They fired me!
1307
01:09:01,719 --> 01:09:03,452
We don't have jobs.
1308
01:09:03,454 --> 01:09:06,555
We are unsorted, Paul!
We're unsorted!
1309
01:09:09,560 --> 01:09:12,562
What are we gonna do, Claire?
What are we gonna do?
1310
01:09:12,564 --> 01:09:14,833
I love you. I love you. Uh...
1311
01:09:15,867 --> 01:09:16,835
Yeah?
1312
01:10:55,934 --> 01:11:00,572
Claire Annabelle McKenty,
you, will you marry me?
1313
01:11:12,617 --> 01:11:15,116
No.
1314
01:11:15,118 --> 01:11:17,054
I can't marry you.
1315
01:11:53,658 --> 01:11:55,761
Hello, Claire, my child.
1316
01:11:57,996 --> 01:12:01,630
- It's you.
- It's me.
1317
01:12:01,632 --> 01:12:03,132
I-I can't believe it.
You-you came.
1318
01:12:03,134 --> 01:12:04,333
They doubted you, but you came.
1319
01:12:04,335 --> 01:12:07,769
Shh, quiet now.
Let's not spoil it.
1320
01:12:07,771 --> 01:12:09,271
I just can't believe it.
1321
01:12:09,273 --> 01:12:11,206
You're actually,
you're here i-in my tub.
1322
01:12:11,208 --> 01:12:12,775
Remember the thing
about not spoiling it
1323
01:12:12,777 --> 01:12:14,242
that I just said
six seconds ago?
1324
01:12:14,244 --> 01:12:17,079
Oh, yeah. Yeah, sorry.
I just...
1325
01:12:17,081 --> 01:12:19,749
Well, y-your teachings
have changed my life.
1326
01:12:19,751 --> 01:12:21,750
- Mm-hmm.
- It's just...
1327
01:12:21,752 --> 01:12:23,352
Things aren't working now
and I don't know,
1328
01:12:23,354 --> 01:12:25,388
I don't know
where I've gone wrong.
1329
01:12:25,390 --> 01:12:27,656
Mm, tell you,
when this whole thing started,
1330
01:12:27,658 --> 01:12:30,425
I never thought it would spread
further than my backyard.
1331
01:12:30,427 --> 01:12:32,361
Just a bunch of crazy loons
dancing in the light
1332
01:12:32,363 --> 01:12:36,132
of the instantaneous eternity
over nachos and Fanta.
1333
01:12:36,134 --> 01:12:39,402
But soon the whole city
became my backyard.
1334
01:12:39,404 --> 01:12:42,808
The beacon of Storsh was lit
and the people came.
1335
01:12:44,141 --> 01:12:45,741
I know I did.
1336
01:12:45,743 --> 01:12:47,209
I know you know you did.
1337
01:12:47,211 --> 01:12:49,778
I was watching you
from the afterlife.
1338
01:12:49,780 --> 01:12:53,214
You know, the spiritual reward
for saving souls was incredible.
1339
01:12:53,216 --> 01:12:55,116
What a buzz!
It's just like a tingle.
1340
01:12:55,118 --> 01:12:57,119
But soon that wasn't enough.
1341
01:12:57,121 --> 01:12:58,920
I needed to reach
more of my children,
1342
01:12:58,922 --> 01:13:00,755
I needed the message
to find the masses
1343
01:13:00,757 --> 01:13:02,958
and save the souls
of the entire world
1344
01:13:02,960 --> 01:13:05,227
like, on a God level.
1345
01:13:05,229 --> 01:13:09,732
You know, I, I made a plan
and that plan was I'd get caught
1346
01:13:09,734 --> 01:13:11,866
and I'd become
a media sensation.
1347
01:13:11,868 --> 01:13:14,236
Live out my days in some
cushy, white-collared prison
1348
01:13:14,238 --> 01:13:15,937
like Bundy Romanson.
1349
01:13:15,939 --> 01:13:19,241
TV specials, conjugal visits.
1350
01:13:19,243 --> 01:13:21,710
So I let that cop catch me.
1351
01:13:21,712 --> 01:13:24,345
You know this guy,
you know who I'm talking about?
1352
01:13:24,347 --> 01:13:26,081
- Cartwright?
- Yeah.
1353
01:13:26,083 --> 01:13:28,183
Naturally, he screwed it all up
and I got off.
1354
01:13:28,185 --> 01:13:29,951
But it turns out,
getting away with it
1355
01:13:29,953 --> 01:13:32,287
was like some major power move.
1356
01:13:32,289 --> 01:13:33,888
Next thing,
I'm this huge celebrity,
1357
01:13:33,890 --> 01:13:35,090
people following me around,
1358
01:13:35,092 --> 01:13:36,392
"Oh, Storsh, have my baby.
1359
01:13:36,394 --> 01:13:38,059
Storsh, can I get a photo?
1360
01:13:38,061 --> 01:13:40,196
Storsh, can I get a photo
of you and me
1361
01:13:40,198 --> 01:13:41,429
trying to make babies?"
1362
01:13:41,431 --> 01:13:43,165
People offering me book deals,
1363
01:13:43,167 --> 01:13:45,468
multiple book deals,
like a three-book deal.
1364
01:13:45,470 --> 01:13:49,237
In the grocery store,
people offering me cupcakes,
1365
01:13:49,239 --> 01:13:51,040
people... I mean, you name it.
1366
01:13:51,042 --> 01:13:53,375
I had an assistant...
1367
01:13:53,377 --> 01:13:55,477
for a little while.
1368
01:13:55,479 --> 01:13:57,479
But then I realized,
"Oh, my God.
1369
01:13:57,481 --> 01:13:59,447
I could immortalize myself
1370
01:13:59,449 --> 01:14:01,183
and forever spread
the word of Storsh
1371
01:14:01,185 --> 01:14:04,754
with the ultimate saving.
Who? Me, myself."
1372
01:14:04,756 --> 01:14:07,123
So I climbed in this bathtub
here and I did my thing
1373
01:14:07,125 --> 01:14:10,862
and in one fell swoop, I became
the god I was destined to be.
1374
01:14:12,195 --> 01:14:15,764
Oh, that is so beautiful.
1375
01:14:15,766 --> 01:14:18,400
Yeah, I guess it is.
1376
01:14:18,402 --> 01:14:21,370
But, you, Claire, you, my love.
1377
01:14:21,372 --> 01:14:23,272
None of my followers
have served me
1378
01:14:23,274 --> 01:14:25,473
as greatly or lovingly as you.
1379
01:14:25,475 --> 01:14:28,477
And yet, there is still one
final lesson for you to learn.
1380
01:14:28,479 --> 01:14:31,115
Oh, teach me. I-I want to learn.
1381
01:14:32,783 --> 01:14:35,785
You've been so focused
on saving everyone else,
1382
01:14:35,787 --> 01:14:39,455
you've forgotten the
most important person of all.
1383
01:14:39,457 --> 01:14:42,223
I-I'm sorry, what?
1384
01:14:42,225 --> 01:14:45,093
You've been so focused
on saving everyone else,
1385
01:14:45,095 --> 01:14:48,798
you've forgotten the
most important person of all.
1386
01:14:48,800 --> 01:14:49,964
I-I don't...
1387
01:14:49,966 --> 01:14:51,000
You've forgotten
the most important
1388
01:14:51,002 --> 01:14:52,270
person of all.
1389
01:14:53,805 --> 01:14:57,106
Oh... Oh.
1390
01:14:57,108 --> 01:15:01,313
Yeah. I understand.
1391
01:15:02,445 --> 01:15:04,082
I understand.
1392
01:15:06,551 --> 01:15:09,354
The door to my bus
is always open, Claire.
1393
01:15:10,822 --> 01:15:12,090
Always open.
1394
01:15:50,394 --> 01:15:52,160
Hey, Cartwright.
1395
01:15:52,162 --> 01:15:56,264
I heard you're, uh, going off
to make your movie.
1396
01:15:56,266 --> 01:15:59,101
Yeah.
Finally pulling it together.
1397
01:15:59,103 --> 01:16:00,870
Oh.
1398
01:16:00,872 --> 01:16:02,204
I'll see you at the premiere.
1399
01:16:07,944 --> 01:16:09,180
Oh-ho...
1400
01:16:11,649 --> 01:16:14,215
Ah, man, you're such a wiener.
1401
01:16:16,052 --> 01:16:19,858
Oh, man.
1402
01:16:31,969 --> 01:16:33,268
Hey.
1403
01:16:33,270 --> 01:16:34,238
Hey.
1404
01:16:37,440 --> 01:16:39,275
Still wanna go to Winnipeg?
1405
01:16:39,277 --> 01:16:41,977
Not really.
1406
01:16:41,979 --> 01:16:43,414
Yeah, me neither.
1407
01:16:47,150 --> 01:16:48,951
And while you were in there
talking to the bathtub,
1408
01:16:48,953 --> 01:16:51,553
I did some thinking.
1409
01:16:51,555 --> 01:16:53,955
Yeah?
1410
01:16:53,957 --> 01:16:57,692
The reason
you never really married me.
1411
01:16:57,694 --> 01:16:59,163
I get it.
1412
01:17:00,931 --> 01:17:02,132
You do?
1413
01:17:04,635 --> 01:17:07,402
You love me.
1414
01:17:07,404 --> 01:17:11,307
It's just not
a romantic kind of love.
1415
01:17:11,309 --> 01:17:13,244
It's a friend kind of love.
1416
01:17:14,244 --> 01:17:16,046
Oh, Paul...
1417
01:17:19,516 --> 01:17:20,985
I'm sorry.
1418
01:17:22,286 --> 01:17:23,555
For what?
1419
01:17:25,256 --> 01:17:27,455
That I'm not smart.
1420
01:17:27,457 --> 01:17:30,394
What? No. No.
1421
01:17:31,695 --> 01:17:33,631
You're the smartest guy I know.
1422
01:18:12,069 --> 01:18:14,506
This is the sloppiest tub death
I've ever seen.
1423
01:18:18,609 --> 01:18:21,477
It's weird how they all have
some kind of red dye
1424
01:18:21,479 --> 01:18:23,178
on their lips now.
1425
01:18:23,180 --> 01:18:25,115
Yeah, it's totally weird, right?
1426
01:18:31,021 --> 01:18:33,388
Her elderly,
physically-decrypted husband
1427
01:18:33,390 --> 01:18:35,424
from whom she stands
to inherit millions
1428
01:18:35,426 --> 01:18:37,659
somehow gets his walker up
the flight of stairs.
1429
01:18:37,661 --> 01:18:39,463
That part's actually true.
1430
01:19:02,153 --> 01:19:05,286
What is that? This one.
1431
01:19:05,288 --> 01:19:09,159
That, that's the coffee shop
where we had our first kiss.
1432
01:19:11,061 --> 01:19:13,294
What's this?
1433
01:19:13,296 --> 01:19:18,166
Uh, it's the pizza shop where
I thought we had our first kiss.
1434
01:19:18,168 --> 01:19:19,401
Oh.
1435
01:19:19,403 --> 01:19:22,137
Apparently, I was mistaken.
1436
01:19:22,139 --> 01:19:23,671
Yeah.
1437
01:19:23,673 --> 01:19:25,441
What's this one?
It's just a line.
1438
01:19:25,443 --> 01:19:28,777
No, no, no. See.
This is, this is your butt.
1439
01:19:28,779 --> 01:19:31,146
Oh.
1440
01:19:31,148 --> 01:19:33,449
Which I do like very much.
1441
01:19:33,451 --> 01:19:36,250
I know you do.
1442
01:20:01,311 --> 01:20:02,678
♪ Parmesan meatball soup ♪
1443
01:20:02,680 --> 01:20:04,178
♪ Here we go another fruit ♪
1444
01:20:04,180 --> 01:20:05,680
♪ Apple pecan pumpkin pie ♪
1445
01:20:05,682 --> 01:20:08,252
♪ Buy me a ticket
so we can fly ♪♪
1446
01:20:09,886 --> 01:20:11,355
We did it.
1447
01:20:13,123 --> 01:20:14,391
Do you yield?
1448
01:20:16,426 --> 01:20:17,694
I do.
1449
01:20:19,829 --> 01:20:21,231
Do you?
1450
01:20:23,234 --> 01:20:24,335
I do.
1451
01:21:54,490 --> 01:21:57,526
Oh, Bloyce. I'm sorry.
I-I thought you'd be done.
1452
01:21:57,528 --> 01:21:59,294
I was wrapping up.
1453
01:21:59,296 --> 01:22:01,929
I wish I can...
1454
01:22:01,931 --> 01:22:03,932
I can't believe
that I have to put this unit
1455
01:22:03,934 --> 01:22:05,834
on the market again.
1456
01:22:05,836 --> 01:22:07,702
I can't seem to keep
any tenants here
1457
01:22:07,704 --> 01:22:09,806
for more than a couple of weeks.
1458
01:22:15,011 --> 01:22:17,648
You know,
what if I moved in and...
1459
01:22:19,382 --> 01:22:21,653
Really? You wanna live here?
1460
01:22:22,853 --> 01:22:24,719
It's cheap and, uh,
1461
01:22:24,721 --> 01:22:26,888
very conveniently located.
1462
01:22:26,890 --> 01:22:31,529
And... I already know
the neighbors are nice.
1463
01:22:33,463 --> 01:22:34,996
Thank you.
1464
01:22:34,998 --> 01:22:36,934
I'm gonna get that lease.
1465
01:23:27,984 --> 01:23:30,619
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
1466
01:23:30,621 --> 01:23:33,487
♪ All of the dark
goes down the drain ♪
1467
01:23:33,489 --> 01:23:36,927
♪ Again and again and again ♪
1468
01:23:38,595 --> 01:23:41,530
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
1469
01:23:41,532 --> 01:23:44,333
♪ All of the dark
goes down the drain ♪
1470
01:23:44,335 --> 01:23:47,771
♪ Again and again and again ♪
1471
01:23:49,506 --> 01:23:52,441
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
1472
01:23:52,443 --> 01:23:55,009
♪ All of the dark
goes down the drain ♪
1473
01:23:55,011 --> 01:24:00,682
♪ Again and again and again ♪
1474
01:24:00,684 --> 01:24:03,384
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
1475
01:24:03,386 --> 01:24:05,986
♪ All of the dark
goes down the drain ♪
1476
01:24:05,988 --> 01:24:11,460
♪ Again and again and again ♪
1477
01:24:11,462 --> 01:24:13,995
♪ Wash the sad out
no more pain ♪
1478
01:24:13,997 --> 01:24:16,831
♪ All of the dark
goes down the drain ♪
1479
01:24:16,833 --> 01:24:21,469
♪ Again and again and again ♪
1480
01:24:53,970 --> 01:24:55,870
♪ Shining royal hearts ♪
1481
01:24:55,872 --> 01:24:59,141
♪ Will forever stand ♪
1482
01:24:59,143 --> 01:25:01,643
♪ Sometimes in the dark ♪
1483
01:25:01,645 --> 01:25:04,812
♪ They take my hand ♪
1484
01:25:04,814 --> 01:25:07,014
♪ Shining royal hearts ♪
1485
01:25:07,016 --> 01:25:10,050
♪ Forever love ♪
1486
01:25:10,052 --> 01:25:15,824
♪ Watching all the madness
from above ♪
1487
01:25:15,826 --> 01:25:18,058
♪ Shining royal hearts ♪
1488
01:25:18,060 --> 01:25:20,728
♪ Forever stand ♪
1489
01:25:20,730 --> 01:25:23,531
♪ Sometimes in the dark ♪
1490
01:25:23,533 --> 01:25:26,500
♪ They take my hand ♪
1491
01:25:26,502 --> 01:25:29,070
♪ Shining royal hearts ♪
1492
01:25:29,072 --> 01:25:31,973
♪ Forever love ♪
1493
01:25:31,975 --> 01:25:37,711
♪ Watching all the madness
from above ♪
1494
01:25:37,713 --> 01:25:39,815
♪ Shining royal hearts ♪
1495
01:25:39,817 --> 01:25:42,784
♪ Forever stand ♪
1496
01:25:42,786 --> 01:25:45,553
♪ Sometimes in the dark ♪
1497
01:25:45,555 --> 01:25:48,190
♪ They take my hand ♪
1498
01:25:48,192 --> 01:25:50,858
♪ Shining royal hearts ♪
1499
01:25:50,860 --> 01:25:53,727
♪ Forever love ♪
1500
01:25:53,729 --> 01:25:58,535
♪ Watching all the madness
from above ♪♪
1501
01:27:41,139 --> 01:27:46,139
Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
112021
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