Original subtitles

How are you. Uncle Wu? (Lien Ping Police Station)

Since my return to the country. (Lien Ping Police Station)

and because of my good performance in Hong Kong.

I have learned many things about Hong Kong's police management.

So I have been promoted to the position of Chief of Detectives in Lien Ping

And also as a part-time instructor in the training centre.

Besides Sheng.

there is also an excellent martial artist

helping me out to solve cases and deal with the training.

Since China's open-door policy.

there have been many foreign visitors coming to our great motherland.

So as a public security officer.

we should learn one or two extra languages.

For example. when a foreigner witnesses something he doesn't like or unsatisfied with.

he would say...

Sheng. why don't you show them?

Sure!

Let's say there is a foreigner who got himself into a car accident. he would be in pain.

He would say. "Oh shit!"

Oh shit!

"Jo Sun" in English is "Good morning!"

Good morning!

Let's say for example. that I've bumped into you. you would say "l meet you"

I meet you

If you bumped into me.

If you bumped into me

What would you say?

It should be "You meet l".

You meet l.

What if you bumped into each other?

Then that would be "Meet The Other"

Chief

What is this BBQ. that many Hong Kong people speak of?

The BBQ. is the name of a bridge in Hong Kong

It's as beautiful as a painting there and the weather is always as good as spring

Families love to roast food

on those grills over there on Sundays.

As to why it's called "BBQ".

it's because there was a man named "B.B."

had a hobby of helping people roast their food

He grilled himself to death in an accident

So as a token of commemoration to him.

the bridge was then called "BBQ". BB got killed!

Well. all for today

Next week. we will be teaching German.

What's the best weapon to use when catching robbers?

A gun

Wrong. Until proven guilty.

he is still an innocent man

So when you are tackling civilians at a time not that critical

there is no need to use a gun

Another thing to point out

Other than being able to fight in an attack

we must also able to endure a little pain when we get injuries

So. don't be a disgrace to the Public Security Bereau.

Tiger Hsu. are you ready?

Yes

Very well. fight.

Hit harder.

Hit him!

Hit him again.

Good. this shows that hard breathing exercises

armed by the powers of Lei Feng spirit. is effective.

(Contribute your life is a bliss-Lei Feng)

Alright! Next time. we will demonstrate something else

When we are sent on duty for an assignment.

We will require to match with Sheng's extraordinary powers.

Sheng's powers

can tell us whether or not there are people behind us.

Take a close look. everyone.

Is there anyone behind door #1?

Y es

Door #2?

No

How about door #3?

No

Okay! What about door #4?

Y es

And finally. is there anyone in the fifth door?

Of course not.

Someone's in there!

You punk!

Oh. shit!

Fellow comrades

our course that combines Eastern and Western techniques is now completed

We must challenge corrupt powers from all around the world.

Here. I will send my salute with a toast to everyone

As a reward for you all. I've prepared to sing...

to sing a song for you

Did you reveal my secret to them?

I only said your chi kung breathing exercises is able to shatter these glass

Water can drift away when it is blown.

Once gone. a hero shall never return.

I'm only going back to pay my mother a visit.

You think I'm going to a war zone?

Colonel. this is the old military map we used in the past.

Really?

There's a cave there.

There are many hidden firearms in this cave.

This is a fountainhead right here.

There is a path that leads to the sea.

What's this place with the marked circle?

This family's got a very beautiful daughter.

Really?

But she is already 70 years old right now.

This is the address of Yangtze No. 1

Don't disappoint us on this trip

We'll await for your good news.

We're arriving soon. Don't cross that border.

You would be executed by gunshot if you step beyond the border.

Yangtze No. 1

Goodbye

My dear.

You knew you are going to China and you get pissed like that?

Please kneel down when you see your Gandma

You haven't see each other for decades

Do you recognize her?

Are you nuts?

She gave birth to me. how can I forget?

Comrade. my name is Wu Guo-Min.

I've reserved a room in here.

Okay. Please wait. I will check for you.

Thank you

Mama

Mama! Mama!

Mom. I've been an unfilial son

I haven't been able to take care of you after all these years.

The Communists have tortured you to this state

You look completely different now

Look. you've got a lot of wrinkles.

You've got fewer teeth now

Your face looks sharper than before

Your eyes got smaller

Your mouth looks wider.

She's not your mother

Lady. you're not my mommy

Why are you crying like that?

I haven't been held by a man in years.

And here. you're holding me so tightly.

I couldn't help but to be horrified with so much fear.

Then where's my mommy?

Your mother actually died 2 years ago.

Wei-Guo told me not to tell you.

Shit! I can't even get myself to shed tears again

Your granny was forced into her death by the Communists.

Uncle. granny's already in her nineties.

what?

She could have lived to 160 years old.

It was her who raised me and your late father.

A pair of unreplenishable hands

forever bringing warmth

Even though she nags. she is always caring.

I'm carrying regret for not cherishing it.

She may not appreciate my beautiful notes.

But the motherly love will never go away.

I am determined to struggle within the happiness of my heart.

So I can repay my gratitude to my family.

But how can I ever repay with all her loving care

which is broad beyond compare?

Please allow me to say I really love you.

Uncle. it's okay to just say it. no need to sing it out.

What do you know?

Miss. "Clean my butt" (poor mandarin pronunciation)

Miss. "Please clean my butt" (poor mandarin pronunciation)

Sir. I am serving for the people

I'm not here to clean your butt

So you speak Cantonese?

I need the key for my room

This is "Door's Key" not "Butt Clean"

Sorry

Are you in a hurry to go to hell?

Sheng. we have a casualty. Get to the scene immediately.

Okay!

Hold up

We must wear a raincoat first. Looks more professional!

Inspector Cheng

What's the situation?

The corpse is in there

Let's head over there

Sheng. bring a Public Security dog over

My extraordinary power is still working

You seem to be running into a lot of snags. Just go!

Inspector Cheng

Is it a local?

It's a man from Hong Kong.

How long has he been dead for?

He didn't say

He's been dead for 3 hours.

Why are you wearing a raincoat when it's not even raining outside?

Why are you also wearing it?

I'm here on investigation.

Are you aware that you are stepping on somebody's hand?

Have you no feeling?

Who are you?

He discovered the deceased and has witnessed the suspect.

And you are...

I'm the County lnspector

and member of National People's Congress

I've once studied in Hong Kong

Now. can I leave?

I'd like you to cooperate with Public Security Bureau

I have been most cooperative.

I want you to help us identify the killer.

I'm here on a sight-seeing tour.

Then. how did you know that the deceased died for three hours?

Because many women have died because of me

Tiger. Iock him up.

I must see the British Consul

I want to write a complaint letter against you to Oriental Daily.

What happened?

Uncle Wu

Miss Cheng

How are you?

Back to our motherland to visit family?

Coming back to attack the Mainland

Is no easy task.

What kind of trouble has my nephew been up to?

Is he the cousin of Wu Wei-Guo? Yes

Nothing

We'll need his cooperation and help us arrest the suspect.

Hey. kid! You're a cop from the Homicide Division

Why aren't you helping out?

A colleague?

Yes

Through a mutual cooperation.

It can lead to a better understanding between China and Hong Kong

accelerating China's four modernizations plan

It plays on active role in maintaining the prosperity and stability of Hong Kong

Say that again. and I'll return to Hong Kong right away

He means he agrees to work with you.

Miss. I'll treat you out for dinner.

No can do. Tonight. I should be the one to host a feast for you.

Thank you

Inspector. Sheng was wounded by a Public Security dog

Give him the antidote

Uncle Wu.

Did you bring any anti-Communist flags with you upon your return?

No

But anything tattooed on the chest won't leak

Let's stop kidding around from here on.

I'd advise you not to go swimming or bathe in front of others.

OK

The eagle catches chicks. a branch of plum blossom dropped on the snow

The wind blows on the eggshell

What are you saying?

A password

Are you Y angtze No. 1?

No. 1? This is No.4

Here is the funding from the organization for your several decades of work.

The organization gave this to me? -Yes

Are Yangtze No. 4. 5 and 6 here?

Since this is what the organization arranged it shouldn't be much of a problem.

All the Yangtze's are inside. Iet's discuss the details inside.

It's a cozy little place. unlike Hong Kong

Anyone inside?

No but you'd have to leave if there is response

His eyes look like Wei-Guo

This fella's got big arms and legs. He doesn't look like a gentleman.

I heard he is a native of the Szu Ping province.

and somehow he went to HK

He's made frequent visits to the Mainland in recent years.

He's made plenty of deals

He's a heavy smoker

Look, his teeth and hands are also smoke-stained

He's plump. fat and lacks the qualities of laboring people

His wound slants downward

I figure the murderer's height must be taller than the deceased.

and he is left-handed

A pointed head and narrow forehead point to a bourgeois thinker

His parotid gland indicates a counter-revolutionary

His veins are broken. clearly an indication of the killer's skills.

He deserved his death.

Notice how he looks fierce at the time of his death

Y es. with a swollen mouth and a flat nose indicates that he isn't very well educated.

Right. bald above and a contraction below shows fickleness

And inertia demonstrates an evil mind

This is not an autopsy. this is physiognomy

It's a waste of time and efforts

Wrong. this information can be of use.

At least. it can give us a better understanding of the murder victim.

What is this?

Crumbs from camphor wood

There was a furniture plant built in the town last year

They specialize in producing camphor wood boxes

Then. the victim must have gone there before.

I'll contact the secretary from the plant for questioning right away

Did you know him?

No

Never met him either?

Never.

Tsai. have you seen this man before?

No. I haven't.

How many people work in your factory?

Over a hundred

Very well. Tomorrow. I will send a witness to identify people in your plant.

Tell your workers to get prepared.

Okay

You hear that. Tsai?

Got it!

Hollywood's got a big hotel

Can't be turned on again?

If I see a dozen women on my bed when the lights on

how would I handle it?

He's hiding in shadows while you're stepping out in sunlight.

You can avoid it once but never twice

I'm going to pack my bags immediately to Hong Kong

Then. there's no second shot.

If you leave. you'll be letting the killer run loose.

This case is of no concern to me.

Once you caught the culprit. send me his photo

I'll call you once I identify him

Then you can go ahead and execute him.

You are defaming

the law of a communist country. I...

Pipe down!

Comrade Wu. I sincerely hope that you can assist in apprehending the criminal

And stay behind for the witness stand

Comrade Shin-nan

Comrade Wu will stay at your place and will accept

24 hours of secured protection.

Hope you can keep him satisfied as best you can.

What?

Perfect! A hero knows a hero when he sees one

You hear that? Satisfy my needs as best you can

Commissioner. I can be of assistance in protecting him too

You better hurry and catch the criminal with Sheng. Now go!

Isn't that the seedless watermelons are very popular around here?

But there are so many seeds!

What seeds? They're flies

How long will this take?

It won't be long. Let's go

We can't get there till dusk

Our village is not that far away

Our broad masses of local farmers walk for miles everyday

So to me. this distance is nothing

Keep yourself on a lookout at the front of the village

Tell Sheng to keep watch at the back of the village when he's in sight

What are you doing? Go!

Wait for me

Sheng

What are you two doing there?

She's asked ne to teach her how to use ESP

Your eyes look all red.

If I came late. then your chastity would have been lost

Why should I defend my chastity?

A drop of sperm equals seven drops of blood!

Chastity only comes once.

Once it's gone. it never comes back.

Why are diamonds so valuable?

It's because they're rare.

Your ESP powers are finished once you lose your chastity

The country supports you so much and this is how you repay your country?

How did you know I can lose my powers once my chastity is gone?

Your powers haven't been working well lately once you think of perverse things

Now go on the lookout at the back of the village. Go!

Now this place of yours isn't too shabby

It'd cost millions for a place like this in Hong Kong

It was built two years ago

They had allotted me a unit as big as a basketball court

but I took this to save all the unnecessary footwork

You can sleep on my bed tonight.

What about you?

I can sleep anywhere

No can do

My hormones oozes out whenever I sleep on a lady's bed

I want to take a shower. do you have a bathtub?

We are heros who stand firmly in the storm

We never lie down. even when bathing

So do you have a shower? - Y es

Is this a wardrobe?

There's no electricity

This way

My hormones will rise again if you keep gasping like that

Lake Hunghu...

Can you sing a little louder?

I never take my singing seriously

How is Wei-Guo doing?

He's fine

He's doing well in the UK.

Comrade Wu. your eyes look very similar to Wei-Guo's.

So you like my cousin?

No. I was just asking.

How do you think of our motherland?

Our motherland? Nothing special.

How about Wei-Guo?

You've just asked that question.

Really?

Where can I take a leak?

Sorry

Don't come over!

Why do you Hong Kong people

Iove to expose your "inner" parts like that?

You think it looks good like that? Do you?

Nancy

Nancy. please don't leave me

Nancy. I really love you

Nancy

Don't come over!

Nancy. I really love you

That's enough. You should stop this. wake up

I am really ashamed of your behavior

You petit bourgeois

You must have never heard of our great Chairman Mao's quotes and verses

I'll recite a few for you

Watch the pine at dusk. It feels at ease when the uneasy clouds roll by

A fairy cave by nature presents infinite landscape at a dangerous peak

The following are Lei Feng's maxims

A revolutionist

must place revolution above all else

and contribute everything for the sake of the party.

Only then. you can gain happiness.

What are you doing?

It's not my fault! You leaned over by yourself.

Not your fault?

Of course!

That's insane! Don't tell anyone about this!

Tell who?

What has become of this?

Waves hit waves

on the Lake Hunghu

On the coast of the Lake Hung

is the home town

The boats go

net-easting on mornings

and return at night

with a full load of fish

What's wrong with you?

Don't sing that loud if you're running out of breath

What? But my biggest hobby is to sing

Why aren't you allowing me to sing? I'll insist on singing.

Coming

Coming

The meal is ready

Help yourself. sir

Are you possessed?

When did you come back all of a sudden?

How's the investigation? I'm returning to Hong Kong soon

Soon. it'll be over soon

Hung. open the door

Uncle Wu's been looking for you

Let him in and have some congee

Uncle. what are you doing?

It turns out that there isn't only a Yangtze 1. 2. and 3.

There are over hundreds of them

I'm lacking budget. I'm going to need more.

What are you up to. Uncle?

State affairs. no need for you to ask.

Give me the money. quickly!

Goodbye

Where's Uncle Wu?

He's acting all mysterious. Don't know what he's up to.

Yeah. do you have a sleepwalking problem?

No I don't.

But friends have told me that I would

walk around every night at 2am.

Nancy

Nancy

Nancy

I was wrong.

Right here

Nancy. I really love you

No more

The little sparrow carrying a bamboo stick. staring at his auntie.

Auntie dresses her hair with dragon phoenix buns

How long have you been standing there?

Just now

What are you doing here?

We've caught a suspect

I know

Are you looking for me?

Y es. I'm looking for you

We've caught the suspect this morning

We found a "Silly Son" watch in possession of him.

The victim reported it when entering the border

We must ascertain

if he's the man who fled from the scene

Please come over to identify him

Are you talking to me?

Of course. I'm talking to you

I've been keeping eye contact with you. Let's go!

What were you doing

from 1 0 am on Oct.3rd

to the mornings of Oct.4?

According to the Constitution. Chapter 5 Article 12 Section 1

I have the right to remain silent

What were you doing

in Room 61 3 Friendship Hotel?

According to the Constitution. Chapter 5 Article 22 Section 9

I have the right to remain silent

Where did you obtain this "Silly Son" watch?

According to the Constitution. Chapter 9 Article 29 Section 9

I have the right to remain silent

Your law confines you to remain silent. doesn't it?

Is it against the law to say one word?

According to the Constitution. Chapter 5 Article 21 Section 6

I have the right to remain silent

Well. take this as my question of curiosity

What are you two mumbling about?

According to the Constitution. Chapter 99 Article 26 Section 1

I have the right to remain silent

Lawyer.

Are you speaking on behalf of the party or the criminal?

I'm speaking for the party.

Get out

Are you going to speak or not?

If not. then I'll beat you up badly enough that you'll be crawling on the streets

I'll beat you to a bloody pulp

I saw you coming out of the room

And you dare say you are still not the killer?

You wanna sleep out in the streets?

I wanted to steal something.

I saw someone coming in so I hid under the bed.

Then I heard them arguing

What were they debating about?

I believe it had something to do with firearms

Then?

Then the two began to fight

and I passed out.

Liar! How would you pass out when two people are fighting?

They fought till they got under the bed

Soon after. I woke up and tried to run away until I bumped into you.

So did you see that killer?

Y es...Y es. I did.

Sheng - Y es

Bring that man from the Science Analysis Department

to sketch out his descriptions.

You mean that newly formed department?

Of course!

Is that all? We can't even see the important stuff

Only two limbs.

not even his stature

That's all I saw under the bed

Sheng. use your ESP powers to see who the killer is.

Wen Ren-T sai

An assistant to the factory secretary

Do you believe in what he said?

That's right. How did you figure that out?

He's only the one in the county who's wearing "Nick" running shoes.

It's "Nike"

Tiger Hsu. bring out the weapons and arrest that man right away

Move it!

Search!

There's no one in sight. Inspector

Nobody

We've come one step late. He's escaped.

Search for any evidence.

Got it!

So many firearms

Any discoveries?

I believe that Wen Ren-Tsai is connected with the Hong Kong triad mob

Is that so?

This is a misfortune to the family! A misfortune!

You'll have to arrest him no matter what

so that I can close the case with the district

Right. Comrade Wu. please do me a favor

How can I help if I don't have the authority?

Only if you take her to get a hold of that mob boss

I'll send in a good word in the Central Committee for you to your superior to reward you.

Well. we must embark quickly

A sea journey may take too long.

Then. get on a train

Also too slow

Then an airplane...

Such a waste

The government will provide the transportation money

I'm afraid of heights

According to my experience. we should go through Cathay Pacific

Comrade Wu

Pack up your bags. We're heading off tomorrow.

Go back to Hong Kong first. We won't meet again.

Hung. open the door

Uncle Wu

Where's Hung?

He went back to Hong Kong.

There's over a thousand Yangtse's.

Hey. Iady! We're lacking budget here. Can you spare some money for me?

Why do you need so much cash? Thanks

(Lien Ping Police Station)

Why has he left?

I don't know. It is not my business

The guys above want us to

take the blame. It is unreasonable.

That's right

How about this? We'Il take the initiative now.

You rush to Hong Kong and work with the HK police.

I'll handle the rest.

Have no fear. 90 minutes is just around the corner.

Even if there is a plane accident.

it'll go away fast with a "bang".

Don't worry. don't worry

I'm not afraid

Miss. would you like beef or chicken?

Just get me a cup of tea

I'll have chicken

No chicken. just two cups of tea

I want...

Three cups of tea. please

Okay

Can't the youth survive a little hunger?

You've never thought of the old revolutionaries.

Back then. they ate roots. and leather belt

Yet. they still don't feel starvation.

Of course. they don't starve.

Once they eat the leather. they'd vomit it all out.

Sheng. we're here on a mission

We must starve and practice austerity

We're not on a sight-seeing tour. This is no time for rest.

We can't feast ourselves

Miss. your tea.

Thanks

How much does it cost?

It's free

No. we don't have this kind of practices

We have "The Three Disciplines". and "Eight Points of Attention"

We don't leech off a single needle or a piece of thread from the public masses

It's free and the air-ticket includes it

It's really free?

Auntie. it's really free.

Then. we should have eaten if we knew that earlier. What a waste!

No wine. no fruit juices. only tea

And I'm starving so much. my stomach is growling.

And I'll fall unconscious once I land.

How am I supposed to catch the murderer like this?

Don't flare up at me like that? How was I supposed to know?

I would've taken up to 1 0 portions if I knew they were free

Sheng

Would you like to have anything. Miss?

Alright

Sheng. this neck-tie looks perfect for you

The watch - A watch

Auntie. would the commissioner want this Remy Martin?

Okay

And the commissioner

Auntie. the Public Security brothers...

Take it

I want face cream

Alright. thank you!

Thank you. miss

That'll be $8.980

We need to pay for that?

Yes

Sheng.

What did I just buy before I board the airplane?

Why don't I have any cash on me right now?

No. you haven't bought anything.

I bought a piece of land

If you don't have cash. you can pay by credit card.

Card?

Do you have a bigger watch?

No

None?

Sorry. it's too small for me

Have you got this face cream in green?

No

None? Not suitable for use.

Do you have Remy Martin?

Yeah. does this come in cans? No

None? I'll return it back to you.

Return your bottle too

The Commissioner doesn't have one and it'd be awkward if we just gave one to the Secretary

The Public Security officers prefer rice wine. Sorry. Auntie...this...

You rarely use a necktie...

Sorry. we won't need any of this.

That's okay.

Now do you see through the money-making tricks of Capitalists?

What are you up to again?

Are you having a nightmare?

You've puked all over yourself

You best avoid making a mess in someone else's property.

Puke? Why would I puke?

Your ears hurting?

Yes

Have some chewing gum. it's quite effective.

Thank you

Thank you

Miss. the people you'll be working with has arrived.

Miss Cheng

Comrade Wu

I've put forward my trip back

to get clues on the arms sale

I've ventured to fly here for the same purpose

Good

China and Hong Kong have debated over building the new airport

In the firearms investigations. we can work together

This time we've arranged for you to stay at...

We won't stay in hotels with spring beds anymore

Those animals moan and groan in the evenings.

This time. we'll stay in Comrade Wu's home.

You're kidding me?

Aren't you used to the hardship?

What? Never

I'm not afraid no matter how straight the path is

Climbing up eight storeys is a totally different story

You Hong Kong people

don't construct such tall buildings if you're not going to add elevators

Sheng. do you agree with me?

I'm running out of breath here.

Alright. you guys can take a short rest.

I'll explain to you later about

the current situation with the Hong Kong triads.

I already knew about this.

I think we need to go out for investigation in the future

What shall I do

If my legs shiver everytime when I come back here

You should deal with this problem first.

Rest up a bit.

This is your room

If you need anything. just say it.

This way. please.

Right. I should tell you this.

Don't wander off when you're in Hong Kong.

You should leave a note if you head out.

Unlike others. I don't leave without a word.

Great. Iet's start the meeting after a short rest.

Couldn't resist the temptation once you're out?

Pack it up! We've got a case to solve.

Still staring? Go!

Sheng

I couldn't get any sleep

Of course. you couldn't sleep when you're staring at this painting.

It's not that. I have something to discuss with you about.

Then. tell me.

I think I've fallen for your auntie.

You fall for my "willy"?

No. your big sister.

Are you nuts? Don't tell me you're practicing the child skills!

What's the use of that?

The biggest achievement is to remain a child to the age of 90.

Don't tell her that. Now. go sleep.

You shouldn't tell her either.

Got it!

No

Tonight. I've got to tell him no matter what.

Because last time. you were rude to me

So I must teach you a lesson while you are sleeping right now.

Even though you're a sleepwalker. you shouldn't

excuse yourself from doing irresponsible actions.

That's right. I am a very informed member of the party.

But in terms of romance.

I'm quite inexperienced.

I'm a woman too

Marxism Leninism dominates my thoughts

I am a big supporter of the "Four lnsistances"

However, I still have illusions

of the opposite sex.

Because you're a sleepwalker

there's no reason for you

to stir up an innocent person

I'd rather be a sleepwalker

maybe its easier to communicate with you when I goes off in a sleepwalk

So I can take this opportunity to straighten things out with you.

A word spoken is an arrow let fly

He goes off in a sleepwalk before I can finish.

What's the matter?

What's the matter?

Help!

Shut up. you anti-revolutionist!

Who are you?

Cousin Hung

What are you guys doing?

Your relative? Let her go!

Who are these people?

They're Public Security officers from Mainland China. We're working together.

How's that?

I've made some soup for you.

Miss. you look ruddy. You must be suffering from dyspepsia

You should drink more soup

Cousin Hung. have some soup.

She's a cosmetics salesgirl

If you are trying to sell fire prevention kits.

You won't be burning yourself in fire for a demonstration.

Don't you think your face doesn't look very presentable?

If you go to our village.

monkeys would start believing that your ass moved up to your head.

You're being incoherent to me.

She's saying you look like a monkey's...

Cousin Hung. have some soup. I spent a long time to make this.

Okay. we've got to go back to our rooms for a rest.

We'll work on the case tomorrow.

Comrade Wu.

please classify this area as "Out of Bounds".

This will facilitate us in probing the case.

Drink some soup.

What soup? Now go to sleep

Don't assume you're special just because you've got a cousin.

I never thought you were so promiscuous

I'll chop your head off if you sleepwalk again.

A lot of Big Circle Boys hang around here.

And don't forget it's a good place for

different triads organizations to gather information.

You still remember what I taught you last night?

Y es. I remember.

C'mon. Sheng

Left is Jade. Right is Seal.

What else?

Of course. I remember.

Tiger

Call me phony but I'm not a phony

Stop reciting. I'm asking you

Of course. I remember. That company is...

Shit...

Or was it "bullshit"?

Auntie. it's "shit". I'm pretty sure of it.

There's a few people here that appear to be triad

We'll watch and observe. Iet's just play snooker.

You know how to play snooker?

I don't.

How about Tiger?

I've never played it before. but I have a lot of these assassin weapons.

Don't ask. I can play.

Go on and play. I'll gather information from the boss.

You want to molest or rape?

Are you kidding with me? Sister!

I can't find anyone else who will turned up her arse like that when playing snooker

Why don't you use your bottom

to hold a platform?

What are you saying?

Tiger

Don't assume I don't know the triad lingo.

Which company are you with?

Where is this "shit"?

I'm from "Telecom"

I don't know where the "shit" is.

It's prefixed with "Tele"

How many brothers?

1 0.000 men or so.

So many people to keep us outnumbered. who's your big brother?

My big brother is my father's son.

Where is your boss?

Boss?

Let's talk it over

What's going on? Hey. buddy!

Continue playing snooker. I'll pay for the game.

It's prefixed with "Tele"

Excuse me

You're disregarding it?

"Telecome" is the telephone company. It's a legit business.

Stop messing around when you're oblivious about triads.

Me? Oblivious to triads?

Seafood shop is a bad idea. don't try to fool me

You want to fled after a side-kick

I'm not afraid to fight. dog bites your arse

Don't start ratting out like a gold finger

If you do not show up. your girlfriend will get into trouble

Swing. sway and stare!

Good

Still staring? Let me swing for you!

How's that?

We've kept an eye on this joint for a long time.

Our informers have already spread the info.

They say that there will be several mainlanders coming in tonight to gamble.

Your mission is to gain their attention.

I hope you can lure out Wen Ren-Tsai.

OK! Sure

You do know how to gamble. do you?

Black jack. show hand. bacaraat.

Pai Gow. roulette. and everything else.

Here's your gambling money. They're all registered.

We'll have to depend on Sheng's ESP powers to win big money.

Sure

We'll gain their attention at the gambling tables.

Have a seat

Bet. bet. Bigger bets. bigger wins

I'll bet $1 0.000 on big

Okay. $1 0.000 on small

Showdown!! 3. 4. & 6-1 3 on big!

Take this back now

This time I'll bet $1 0.000 on small

I'll bet $1 0.000 on big

Showdown! Pair 5's. and a 4-14 on big!

I shouldn't bet on small

Dammit! It's safer to bet on big.

$20.000 on big

$20.000 on small

Showdown! Pair 3's and a 6-12 on big!

Luckily I've betted on big for this round.

$1.000 tips

What are you doing? What tips? Hands off!

You've won so much already. it is customary to give a bit of tips

That's where you're wrong.

Let's say I win 40 stakes. $1 0.000

and $1 0.000 if I lose 40 stakes

And you levy me $1 0.000 per stake.

Then. I'd be losing $40.000

That's not levying. it's blood-sucking.

You can't each bet on big and the other on small

He's him, I'm me. Why not?

Take it back

Cousin. take this back too.

What are you betting on?

I bet $1 0.000 on big

This time. we'll both bet $1 0.000 on big

I think perhaps betting on small is a better idea. Small

Maybe not.

It's not restricted to bet on either big or small

I can bet on this as well.

I can bet on number and there are many numbers.

You play around with the ouija board?

What? Time's not up yet.

Halt!

No more stakes once the bell rings according to the rules

What rules?

Showdown

All of a kind

What a coincident

She betted $1 0.000 and she won!

Shi. give her the chips.

That's $200.000

$1 0.000 as tips

Let's see what Tiger is up to.

How is it? You've lost it all?

Step aside

No more stakes

$200.000.00

Sis. the biggest stake for this take is $5.000

Then. $5.000

Someone has already been spying on us.

We'll attract attention at the fan-tan tables.

What's the limit?

The upper limit is $50.000

You remember how to play?

Yes. Bets on the remainder of

the sum divided by four wins

Any chance?

Yes

Let's bet $50,000 on two

Showdown

Showdown. one

C'mon...$50.000 on four.

Showdown! Three!

Use your ESP now.

I'll try my best

C'mon! Another 50 grand. still on four!

Showdown. four!

Okay. we'll bet on three

Showdown. three!

Bet on three

Showdown. three

Again on three

We'll also bet on three...

Bet. bet. Make up your mind

Showdown. three!

Where did all these buttons come from?

I took away Hu's pants buttons by magic

Have you got enough buttons for the next stake?

Not enough. I'm now concentrating on taking away your button.

Stop using your powers. someone's looking at you.

Where?

Look at yourself.

Uncle Nine would like to see you all.

Fine

This way please

Let me get the money first.

Please

An underworld kingpin's office looks like Underworld

Have a seat

Nice to see you. miss

We've come from the mainland to venture

out for business in Hong Kong.

So we spent some spare time to pleasure ourselves.

You guys just won a lot of money.

Oh. please don't have any misunderstandings. senior comrade.

My little brother knows some unorthodox tricks

It was just a little misunderstanding

We've actually come to meet fellow friends of the triads.

I'll return these chips to you as a token of my apology.

And here's a little tip for your revolutionary buddies.

My brothers are all in ending stages of their lives.

They have either died or have gotten injured.

Only the few younger ones are left.

Give a smile to the lady. Old Chu.

See? Doesn't he look gimcrack?

Well. not too much like a gimcrack. More like a retard.

But there are still a couple of younger. good-looking brothers

Shi. Hui. smile.

Look! Even their teeths are gone due to constant beatings.

Is that so?

Well. since you're here. I should be more of a host to you.

How about this?

I'll give you a quick tour of all the joints we managed.

Thank you

Have you gone to karaokes before?

Have we gone there? I'll tell you when we get there.

This way. please

Be seated

Godfather. I'll fix up something for you to drink

Fellow triads from Hong Kong and China

Will unite sooner or later.

Come. Iet's drink together!

Cheers!

Unity is power! Cheers!

Miss Cheng. do you think his singing is awful?

Old Chu. tell him to shut the hell up

Don't do this.

But he could have done a better job with this song.

Am I right. Sheng?

You know this song?

I'm familiar with Hong Kong pop music.

Then why don't you sing for us?

No. thanks

No? Then. I'll sing

No! Don't stop me

Sheng. we'll allow Brother Lei to enlighten us

Okay

All yours

Testing... 1...2...3...

Oh. shit!

Test 2

Who's messing around?

Mess?

Miss Cheng can shatter these glass cups by using her inner energy

Alright. Iet's do it

Is it this song? Have you heard it before?

Have you?

I know it.

It's a duet. just sing out the words you see coming out of the screen.

Got it?

Too slow. A bleeding hero howls

Girl-A hero is arrogant with ambitions

Too slow. Hero in this...

...generation. my fame will endure forever

Girl - Chats make the current situation Who's the leader?

Now. we sing in chorus. you sing one verse. I'll sing another.

I'm not afraid of the chilly wind

When there's a war. there's no time for love

Love hidden in the heart. devotes my life to the history

The earth preserves emblem of me

You really have no gift in singing.

You always tend to be one key slower. Sheng.

Once again

Scooting in the desert. I'm not afraid of the chilly wind

When there's a war. there's no time for love

Love hidden in the heart. devotes my life to the history

The earth preserves emblem of me

Why have you stopped singing. Sheng?

Produced by Fitto Entertainment Co.. Ltd

Head Office - Tsimshatsui East, Kowloon...

What are you singing?

You told me to sing out the words from the screen

And this is the only chance I have

so. I sing

Good. good

Thanks for your support

We'll sing another song.

Okay

Her singing is terrible. Let's play a prank on her.

It's not that I'm not letting sing.

But you've got to sing accordingly to the subtitled lyrics.

Let's do it again

Happy Tung Hua 90, do you know this song?

Let's give it a try

Cheung Wing $1 00. Li Ka Fai $200

Mrs. Chan $1 00. Mr. Wong $1 00

Mr. Kam $300. Miss Chu $700

Fan Kim Hung $300. Li Fong Fai $500

Chan Keung $1 00. To Siu Yin $1 00

Mrs. Lau $500. Mrs. Chan $100

Mr. Anonymous $30.000

Mr. Lo $1.800. Mrs. Lo $900

Tin Tin Hot Pot $3.300

I'm not singing this song. The lyrics are all weird

You Hongkong people are cranky

Why put so many figures into a song?

Luckily I have quick wit

Exactly!

Cheers

Uncle Nine

I have a money-making idea. would you be interested?

How?

I have some Fujianese brothers in Taiwan

who needs to make a deal with firearms.

I'm not too confident if I am capable to handle all this.

If you would be the middleman.

I can give you 5% commission.

Why don't I introduce you to some Big Circle boys?

Big Circle Boys? Very well.

Once you get used to it. your feet won't shiver.

Happy...

How is it? Are you alright?

It hurts

Forget it. I apologize to you

She didn't mean it.

I know

Happy Birthday

I won't stand in the way of your personality cult

But our mission tomorrow is fairly important

Hap...bir...py...day

Are you finished?

Okay. that's enough

Sheng. Iet's go

How is it?

Oh. no!

She's stepping my head into the hole

What?

It's true

How can it happened?

Oh. no!

What now?

1. 2. 3

Are you crazy?

Go to the upstream

1. 2. 3

1. 2. 3. 4...

Miss. Please come out

No way

What's the matter?

Take this and put it on.

Are you up to something?

This is a bulletproof vest.

What about you?

I'll duck if people start shooting at me.

You don't need to treat me so nicely

I can't live in peace at night if I don't

Otherwise. I may hear pillow talk every night.

Comrade Wu. will you be carrying a gun tomorrow?

Why do people chatting when others

are sleeping?

Tomorrow. I'll back you up. I'll tell Tiger to stay behind.

It's more than once.

That'r right. If you gave the orders. I will use assassin weapons instead

In fact. I understand her mentality very well.

Of course. we will obey

your every command.

Amazing! It's like nothing happened.

If you request. I'll ask Tiger to use a little less light skills.

Okay but remember to wear your bulletproof vest.

Of course. I'll wear the vest.

You understand that. right?

But the things you said to me that night.

I'll remember every single word of it.

I shall remember the grace of the Communist Party.

Where have you two been?

Nowhere

Nowhere? Then why are you wearing shades?

And you sprayed your hair.

It's not sprayed. it's applied with gel.

But you don't need to gel your eyebrows

Auntie.

We've just infiltrated deeply into the triad to gather information.

That mob boss and Old Chu took us around.

How deep of an infiltration?

Deep enough to join the triads.

Oh shit! A red guard is turning into a black pawn.

Don't worry. No one would know if you don't mention it.

It's not engraved in their hands

It is. How did you know?

Take a look

Alright. can you grab me that red brush over there?

How could you be so stupid?

Lucky for you that this can be remedied

Isn't Tiger pitiful? He's got so much on his back

Tiger. take off your clothes so I can take a look

Ho Yi Hsing. No. 14's biggest. Hung clan

Other than Yue Fei.

you're the most tattooed Chinese man.

I couldn't turn them down

There's a way to erase all those words

Sheng. get the brush

May peace last forever! May justice prevail!

For the party and country. the proletariat reigns

I was born on the 1 4th of July

The ground of revolution washed by water marks a new era of Marxism-Leninism

Great

Perhaps even the leader will feel that you love your country

Right

You're so clever

Great. Now that we're clean. Iet's get to sleep early.

Sheng. show him the rules of Hong Kong.

Bumpkin. I'm going to bed.

People say you're stupid.

What are you doing?

Hong Kong people don't drink lemon tea.

They wash their hands after a meal using lemon tea.

Here, wash it.

Wash it like this. you know? Place your hands in here.

The third street outside is a Malaysian restaurant.

You shouldn't have a problem with this street. right?

We've gone to this area before.

We've been here before.

We've arranged a few people at the entrance of the restaurant.

If anything goes wrong. we'll come over.

Do you need a gun?

We have Sheng's ESP powers -Right.

Tiger's assassin weapons -Right

Now all we're lacking is morales

What morales?

It's what you Hong Kong police won't understand.

and what we know best.

Right

Alright. Iet's get moving

This is the morale of Mainland Public Security

Something that people of the Hong Kong police force won't learn

Miss Cheng. right?

Yes

This way

Please

Uncle Nine brought you here?

Nice to see you

Have a seat

Call me phony but I'm not a phony The easterly wind blows at the Buddha head

What would you like to drink?

A new poem? The feast with kaoliang and white wine

Miss. I'm asking you seriously. What would you like to drink?

We're here to do a deal for the Big Circle gang.

We're not here for poetry reciting.

We're all in the same boat.

Very well. tea will do.

Bro. Iemon tea

Three cups of tea

Uncle Nine has spoken highly of you

Flattered

Uncle Nine has mentioned your plans

I think I still want to drink off this cup

This tea is for washing hands.

So. what do you people want?

Be a little more civil

It's like this.

A Taiwanese guy is looking for some firearms and I'm the middleman for it.

It's that simple. so how many do you have?

I have as many as you need.

Great. set a price.

The situation over in China. Hong Kong and Taiwan has been very tense lately.

So this puts up our prices.

So. what's your offer?

Red Star #5. $20.000 each

We have 1.000 pieces in guns alone

Good. We'll pay you $25 million.

That's a five million dollar increase.

Then you can split the five million dollars to your brothers.

Great

Hold on. I'd have to check your stock first.

Of course. we'll show you that the stock is genuine.

Very well. then it's a deal.

Miss. it must have been tough for you three in the business.

You're all blind in the left eye.

How can we call yourselves "brothers of the underworld"

ifwe haven't gone through fierce battles?

Tiger. tell this brother how you got your injury.

One time. when I entered a house on a mission.

I was peeping through the keyhole

And the owner stabbed my eye with a needle.

It hit my eye.

So I plucked the needle out of my eye

and took off.

That's heroic

Sheng. it's your turn.

Y eah. I was also stabbed in the eye with a needle.

It's due to my peeping in the ladies shower too much.

So I got a thorn in my eye.

I'd never thought that the thorn would cause my eye to go blind.

How about you. miss?

I've been in the triads since I was 1 7 years old.

I commit all sorts of crimes. robbery. rape. swindle and many others

Then. a rival gang kidnapped me one time.

They kept asking for the location of the hidden drugs.

And they just kept hitting me with punches and kicks. I was just mute like a fish.

Soon after. they said they wanted to rape me.

When a guy got closer to me.

I gouged out my eye with both fingers

and swallowed it like a pill.

I even said it was delicious.

So they let me go out of scare and admiration

My deed created a sensation in the underworld

But let's forget these small matters.

We should get to discussing our meeting place and time

Get in the car

Sure

Get in that car.

Get in that car.

Hold on! Where are we going now?

We're making the deal

How else would I show you the firearms?

That gave a scare. Smarten up a bit.

Let's go!

Don't move

Where's the key? Tell me now!

Speak up! Where's the keys?

Where are the keys? Speak up!!

The keys

Let me try

I'm going to strangle you to death if you don't tell me where the keys are.

You would never know where the keys are if you kill him

Tell me!

Tiger. gouge out his eyes.

He has heart problems.

He needs to take his medicine.

Miss. didn't you say you wanted to make a deal?

Don't you want to try out the power of the guns?

It's not my birthday today. What about you. Sheng?

I don't make deals. but I do eat meals.

I've been with the party for a long time. comrade.

Is that so?

Brother. have they been scared out of their wits?

Who cares?

Chop off their hands and take the money box.

Public Security!

That way!

Get in the car

Don't move

Did you kill Premier Zhou? Confess it now!

You're still denying it?

Did you kill Premier Zhou? Speak up!

Take him to the station.

He killed Premier Chou

Good. Iet's get back to the station.

Good

Keep an eye on him and don't let him escape.

You're injured. you know that?

You'll need to go to the hospital for a check-up.

Otherwise. you might get infection.

I'll finish you off in one shot.

Turn. turn

Turn

Turn again?

32

Even number. hit again!

Turn again

21. 21

Odd number. hit again!

Hitting at odd and even numbers. is there something wrong with you?

So. what would it take for you to not to throw hits?

You'll stop hitting until there is no page number.

Speak up. will you? Still saying nothing? Speak up!

Do you need any psychiatric help?

Yeah. I just went nuts.

Because I'd hate to witness any human massacre. It's okay.

The Russians betrayed our socialism.

So we won't play Russian roulette.

Then we'll play a little Chinese roulette

We'll take out a bullet

Just to be fair. we'll let one of our own to go first.

Sheng

It's your turn

Just play fair

You're really not going to tell?

Don't let her do anything foolish

There's 4 out of 5 chances that it won't hit you.

You sure you're not going to speak up?

Then we'll play a little more seriously

It's loaded with all 5 bullets.

What?

What are you afraid of? Maybe you'll get lucky without a bullet.

Shui-Hing Motel near the Typhoon Shelter

Well done.

Hey. miss! Let me ask you something.

Are those real bullets in the gun?

Of course not

How did you load the bullets. Sheng?

I don't understand

Uncle. why did it take you so long to come back?

Had to wait until the plane crash at the Guangzhou Airport

Otherwise. my old war buddies would assume that I'm useless

Come. sit here - No. thanks

I'd like you to deposit a cheque into my account

Why?

The Yangtze. it's just too long

There's already over 1 0.000 Yangtze's.

Uncle. two sides of the Straits are aiming at reunification

What do you know?

Now Mongolia is the only region without a liaison officer

The Hong Kong government is probing me too. I've gotta leave.

Remember to deposit the money

I want to apply this makeup along with this look.

We're on a stakeout. not a ballroom dance party.

Anyway. I want this look.

As you like.

Cousin Hung told me to make you look better

Yes. because we're following a criminal

Thanks for saving Cousin Hung.

It's no big deal. My attitude towards you

wasn't great when I first met you

Because your face was blushing red so much at the time.

I thought you were always very angry.

Can you make it look better?

Sure! Of course. I can

Can I use my personal stuff?

I have a lipstick

Can I have a look

It's beautiful

You're beautiful too

Are you mixed?

Y es. a little

How?

I'm a British-Chinese mix

Come to think of it. I'm mixed too

Really? How so?

Guangzhou and Szechuan

You're not mixed of different nationalies?

I'm mixed by province.

Miss. don't stand aside. will ya?

Sorry. I didn't do it on purpose.

Chase after him!

Sis. just pretend you're bowling

Why is it called "bowling"?

When you play this game

you have to "bow" in front of the "lane"

That's why it's called "Bow-Lane"

Q.uit fooling around! Keep an eye on that man.

Miss. it's your turn now.

Go. Tiger

You're not bowling! You're lobbing cannonballs.

Let me try

Miss. Miss

You don't shoot that way. It's this way.

I'm aiming at that direction to spy on him at this direction

Okay

Sorry. Iet's try again

Miss. why don't you take a rest?

Is something wrong with your friend? -Sorry

No one followed you. right?

No

Your stuff needs to be shipped to the Middle East

Is the price reasonable enough?

Y es

I'll send in someone to check on the samples in a couple of days.

Okay

He's the honorary chairman of a local charity

I've heard rumours that he's shipped Firearms for a very long time. apparently these rumours are true.

Follow Wen Ren-Tsai

This bowling ball can't be thrown away

You're so meddlesome - Me too

What meddling?

We labour workers have rough hands

Unlike your spoiled and cared hands.

Disregard that. Ieave with the ball.

Is that possible?

Are you alright? - Yes. Iet's move it!

Let's go!

Hands off! - Brother, it's about time

The password this time around is "Where did that man go"?

The samples are placed inside a black bowling ball

These pushers always have new tricks up their sleeve.

Brother. they didn't say they had three bowling balls

That's right. We're short on money.

Other pushers are also free enough to use bowling balls.

Where did that man go. brother?

I want to check the bowling balls.

I can't dispose of this bowling ball.

Then. why'd you tell me to bring money along?

Can it be sold? Make me an offer

You're kidding. right? We've already discussed this. Four hundred grand per 5 pounds

Drug trafficking?

Assume the array

Go. Tiger

Let's intercept him

Y es

Police!

They are police. run!

Tiger

Take him to the station. We'll discuss this with the superior.

Alright. get up

Don't think you can get away with it just because you treated me for a meal

We've got their whereabouts

and yet. you're not letting us track him down.

Frankly speaking. are you working for your boss

or are you working for the people?

What good does it bring me if I served for the people?

You can feel high in spirit and be energetic if you served for the people.

So what?

The firearms are used to protect the country.

not for the benefit of officials.

We must apprehend Lee Ding-Guo and Wen Ren-Tsai

I'll seek help from the Central Committee if needed.

What do you want?

Since we know the location of the criminal's den.

why not raid it?

Be frank. have you made your mind yet?

I have

You're not asking for my opinion?

Truthfully. you don't need to deny

I know you've gotten fond of me.

If you really like me. then we should take action.

Let's pave the way for a brighter tomorrow

If you have something to say. you can say it to me directly

Come to the point

By the hour?

Overnight

You're so naughty

No overnight sleeping tonight. it's been booked after midnight

Came right on time. hurry up!

How is that enough time? You're so bad It's enough

The third one on the left

Thanks!

Not good. it's bad if someone sees us.

You're naughty. it really is no good

I think sleeping overnight is a better idea.

Get busy

I know

Let's wait until 12 before we hide under the bed

We'll nab 'em as soon as they come.

Looks like Sheng and Tiger are here

Gay?

No

Double for two men in one room

What do you say?

No problem

Room 3. check out before midnight

Mr. Lee

Where's Tsai?

He's not here yet

What's wrong with him? Tell him to hurry up

Shit! A war broke out in Middle East

Mr. Lee is pissed. brother...

What? He's carrying a bag full of money

I'm carrying the firearms

Get out!

The money's all here. You do the count.

The stuff will be discharged from the boat later at 4:30

Clear the canals and ensure its safety

Okay

Don't move

Don't move

Drop your guns or I'll shoot him

What do we do now?

Hurry up! Drop your guns

Now!

Comrade Wu

Comrade Wu

Get out!

Get in!

There's no path for us right now and there are people coming after us.

How's your ESP power doing?

Open fire. Auntie

Just think of where you want the bullet to shot at. give it a try

Really?

Yes. do it!

Alright

There's no bullets

What are you doing?

There's one more outside

How is it?

All dead

Really?

Good. get your superior to send some men in.

We did it!

Don't move. don't move!

You two made a huge mess.

I'll give you a day to send the lady from Mainland back to China.

Don't get me demoted Yes. sir

Now we've got to face two bosses no matter what we do.

It'd be a pleasure for me to face you.

Sure

The sooner you leave. the better.

Comrade Wu. you don't need to escort us we're in a rush to take the train.

I want to. I'll take you to the mini-bus.

Okay. Comrade Wu. Thank you! Farewell!

I'll take you to the train

The train?

There's really no need to do that. We're going to Shenzhen

It's better if I see you board the train.

Comrade Wu. it's okay. We'll reach to my home sooner.

Just do as I planned.

My uncle!

Hold on!

Remember!

Uncle

Where have you been? Got lost?

My intelligence was accurate

Yangtze no. 1 0007 said you would return today.

You know. there's over 1 0.000 people helping me to hold function.

Those three triad members just cleaned their records to see me

Here! Hop in!

Yangtze no. 20.001

Yangtze no. 20.002

Yangtze no. 20.003

You don't need to look for me. I'm cryptic

How are you. Uncle Wu?

I'm busy today. Miss Cheng

We'll have tea another time.

Don't say too much to him. It's going to affect you

Let's go

Does the capture of Lee Ding-Guo mean anything to you?

No. but if I wanted to make amends.

All I'd have to do is nab your uncle.

Okay. the car's been waiting for us to get to the train station.

Farewell. Comrade Wu

Goodbye

Sheng. Tiger

Yes