Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,190 --> 00:00:05,023
How terrible! We're going!
2
00:00:06,394 --> 00:00:08,191
You should be ashamed!
3
00:00:21,109 --> 00:00:24,135
- I don't like your father.
- Why not?
4
00:00:24,279 --> 00:00:28,238
He only thinks about women,
sleep and cigars.
5
00:00:28,316 --> 00:00:29,943
And stars...
6
00:00:33,421 --> 00:00:35,582
- let's go.
- Wait.
7
00:00:39,027 --> 00:00:43,054
- Can you see alexander?
- Yes.
8
00:01:00,849 --> 00:01:03,716
Take your hands off me!
9
00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:08,055
Let's wait
until everyone has left.
10
00:01:15,230 --> 00:01:17,323
Sometimes i want to kill you.
11
00:01:17,632 --> 00:01:18,929
And other times?
12
00:01:19,568 --> 00:01:22,162
Other times
i want to love you forever.
13
00:01:46,728 --> 00:01:48,559
- Pjotr!
- What?
14
00:01:50,699 --> 00:01:52,564
You're eating onion again?
15
00:01:52,734 --> 00:01:55,464
Why pjotr, why?
16
00:01:56,571 --> 00:01:58,971
In the film there
were palm trees,
17
00:01:59,107 --> 00:02:01,041
the ocean, bangkok...
18
00:02:01,109 --> 00:02:04,272
rubbish! Do you know
why emmanuelle is happy?
19
00:02:04,346 --> 00:02:06,610
Because the guys in the film...
20
00:02:07,449 --> 00:02:12,182
...have got big guns.
Like pushkin, like me!
21
00:02:13,622 --> 00:02:18,992
You don't understand anything.
Just eating raw onion.
22
00:02:20,495 --> 00:02:22,019
Such passion!
23
00:02:30,272 --> 00:02:33,070
Pjotr, why so crude?
24
00:02:33,141 --> 00:02:37,840
Love has to be beautiful,
it has to be poetic. Bangkok...
25
00:02:42,751 --> 00:02:46,847
- you want bangkok?
- Yes!
26
00:03:25,694 --> 00:03:27,457
What are you doing?
27
00:03:27,896 --> 00:03:29,989
Here are your palm trees!
28
00:03:35,570 --> 00:03:39,973
Here's your... bangkok!
29
00:03:43,378 --> 00:03:46,404
- Here's your...
- emmanuelle...
30
00:03:51,386 --> 00:03:55,015
- but, i can't.
- What can't you?
31
00:03:56,925 --> 00:04:00,122
Pjotr! The size of your dick...
it's not normal.
32
00:04:02,130 --> 00:04:05,293
My lieutenant's is like this...
33
00:04:08,570 --> 00:04:12,802
but yours is very, very big.
It's just not possible!
34
00:04:13,675 --> 00:04:15,700
You want me to cut it off?
35
00:04:16,978 --> 00:04:18,775
Cut it off!
36
00:04:19,981 --> 00:04:21,778
Ok.
37
00:04:24,185 --> 00:04:26,415
- Pjotr!
- Let me!
38
00:04:28,990 --> 00:04:30,582
He's crazy.
39
00:04:58,052 --> 00:05:01,146
Some door should be open.
40
00:05:13,902 --> 00:05:16,393
Can i help you?
41
00:05:17,038 --> 00:05:18,471
Yes.
42
00:05:23,478 --> 00:05:25,070
I'll be right there!
43
00:05:26,314 --> 00:05:27,781
What's wrong?
44
00:05:27,882 --> 00:05:31,409
Pjotr put two ball
bearings on his penis
45
00:05:31,486 --> 00:05:33,511
and had sex with veronica.
46
00:05:33,822 --> 00:05:37,189
The lieutenant's wife?
With ball bearings?
47
00:05:37,258 --> 00:05:39,783
It's because his is very big.
48
00:05:41,996 --> 00:05:44,965
Like the pilot's in
'emmanuelle'?
49
00:05:45,033 --> 00:05:46,898
Idiot! He's heard something
50
00:05:47,335 --> 00:05:51,066
about constriction devices.
But they're not made of steel!
51
00:06:37,719 --> 00:06:40,187
The penis is inflated
like a zeppelin!
52
00:06:42,223 --> 00:06:45,351
- Show me!
- Show him!
53
00:06:55,403 --> 00:06:57,303
You drink my whisky!
54
00:06:57,505 --> 00:07:01,202
You screw the ballerina
in my office! Bastards!
55
00:07:01,342 --> 00:07:03,276
Pjotr, want some water?
56
00:07:04,178 --> 00:07:05,839
Calm down!
57
00:07:11,819 --> 00:07:13,878
How did this happen?
58
00:07:14,956 --> 00:07:17,686
- We watched 'emmanuelle'...
- me too.
59
00:07:17,926 --> 00:07:19,120
Did you like it?
60
00:07:19,460 --> 00:07:23,294
Yes, but no-one there
puts ball bearings on his prick!
61
00:07:23,565 --> 00:07:28,468
- Could it be sawed off?
- It's made of special steel!
62
00:07:29,337 --> 00:07:31,601
I've tried the hartmann method.
63
00:07:31,906 --> 00:07:34,966
Hartmann recommends
wrapping the penis with tape,
64
00:07:35,476 --> 00:07:40,914
beginning at the distal end
and moving upwards in a spiral
65
00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:45,112
towards the point of
constriction!
66
00:07:45,620 --> 00:07:50,057
But with such swelling
hartmanrs method won't work.
67
00:07:50,191 --> 00:07:51,818
Call maria markovna!
68
00:07:53,528 --> 00:07:56,622
- Which markovna?
- Your mother!
69
00:07:56,898 --> 00:08:01,164
Call martha too. The consequences
are hard to predict.
70
00:08:01,803 --> 00:08:04,966
No, she's a pensioner,
she's got asthma!
71
00:08:05,273 --> 00:08:08,470
Our steel is won'th
its weight in gold!
72
00:08:09,210 --> 00:08:12,304
And you go and put it on
your prick. Really, comrades!
73
00:08:42,844 --> 00:08:44,573
It worked!
74
00:08:48,082 --> 00:08:49,811
Bring him here, the rake!
75
00:08:50,818 --> 00:08:53,184
Just look at him!
76
00:08:56,391 --> 00:08:58,188
Don't be frightened!
77
00:09:37,632 --> 00:09:39,065
Go!
78
00:09:55,950 --> 00:09:58,578
Watchmaker's precision!
Thank you.
79
00:09:59,587 --> 00:10:04,820
Where are you, veronica?
Oh, damn you, show yourself!
80
00:10:05,093 --> 00:10:08,654
I'll blow this whole
fucking town to pieces!
81
00:10:09,063 --> 00:10:14,660
Come out! Veronica!
Where have you gone?
82
00:10:15,336 --> 00:10:18,703
Come out this instant...
83
00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:22,734
...or i'll blow this whole
fucking factory to pieces!
84
00:10:22,810 --> 00:10:26,007
Oh, veronica! Come out!
85
00:10:27,181 --> 00:10:32,141
In all my professional practice i've
never seen anything like it before!
86
00:10:35,356 --> 00:10:37,290
I could say even more:
87
00:10:38,493 --> 00:10:42,691
It was huge, terribly huge.
88
00:10:44,699 --> 00:10:47,224
27 centimeters!
89
00:10:48,936 --> 00:10:51,461
And if it had burst?
90
00:10:52,039 --> 00:10:56,135
I'll kill you,
i will, i'll kill you!
91
00:10:56,744 --> 00:10:59,380
- You're a bitch, veronica!
- Shut up!
92
00:10:59,380 --> 00:11:01,382
- I'm not a bitch!
- Be quiet!
93
00:11:01,382 --> 00:11:04,249
- Not in the face, mama!
- Shut up!
94
00:11:26,874 --> 00:11:28,671
What are you doing here?
95
00:11:29,177 --> 00:11:31,372
I've come to watch the moon.
96
00:13:28,963 --> 00:13:33,559
- What are you doing here?
- I want them to drink my blood.
97
00:13:34,101 --> 00:13:38,265
Idiot! I'm the one
with bad blood. I need leeches.
98
00:13:47,148 --> 00:13:50,709
You've got all the leeches
in the swamp on you.
99
00:15:13,167 --> 00:15:16,227
Now he's going to come out...
100
00:15:16,937 --> 00:15:22,543
he's going to come out,
to take five steps,
101
00:15:22,543 --> 00:15:24,170
and then stumble.
102
00:16:23,571 --> 00:16:28,201
- I missed it, dad.
- Aim well! Go on!
103
00:17:07,047 --> 00:17:08,849
Is this what you call hunting?
104
00:17:08,849 --> 00:17:14,185
They said there are
lots of wild boars here.
105
00:17:14,288 --> 00:17:16,347
Look! A boar!
106
00:17:31,005 --> 00:17:34,065
What is it?
107
00:17:34,642 --> 00:17:38,203
- A boar?
- Doesrt look like it!
108
00:17:39,346 --> 00:17:41,314
Was it a wild boar?
109
00:17:41,782 --> 00:17:45,843
I think we've just killed
a domesticated pig.
110
00:17:46,587 --> 00:17:48,646
Let's get out of here, quick!
111
00:17:48,722 --> 00:17:53,819
- Maybe it really was a boar?
- No, boars have tusks.
112
00:17:56,063 --> 00:17:59,555
Lulu! Where's my
little piggy got to?
113
00:18:02,203 --> 00:18:04,933
Have you seen my pig?
114
00:18:05,172 --> 00:18:07,402
The silly thing escaped again!
115
00:18:07,474 --> 00:18:09,465
- What's its name?
- Lulu.
116
00:18:09,610 --> 00:18:12,943
- Oh, lulu! She ran that way.
- Thanks.
117
00:18:22,690 --> 00:18:25,250
We're just disgusting...
...really disgusting.
118
00:18:26,060 --> 00:18:29,496
It's not my fault:
After the film he came
119
00:18:29,496 --> 00:18:33,728
and asked the unimaginable of me.
This morning he lay dead in bed!
120
00:18:51,418 --> 00:18:54,410
The headmaster in
the french teacher's bed!
121
00:19:18,545 --> 00:19:21,241
There its wife comes!
122
00:19:22,950 --> 00:19:25,214
It must be terrible,
123
00:19:25,819 --> 00:19:30,188
to find its man dead
in bed of another woman.
124
00:19:32,559 --> 00:19:35,289
I don't know this man.
125
00:19:50,711 --> 00:19:54,238
And i hardly know him...
126
00:19:57,785 --> 00:19:59,878
hardly...
127
00:20:05,092 --> 00:20:06,116
you know what,
128
00:20:07,594 --> 00:20:10,256
the school will
take care of the funeral.
129
00:20:10,898 --> 00:20:14,129
He was a good headmaster
and a man of morals.
130
00:20:14,201 --> 00:20:16,192
It's better this way.
131
00:20:28,315 --> 00:20:30,374
Have you found your cat?
132
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:36,515
I lost the sea and my cat.
133
00:20:36,957 --> 00:20:39,187
Here, eat this!
134
00:20:40,327 --> 00:20:42,318
Your eyes are so sad.
135
00:20:42,963 --> 00:20:47,525
Take those here and
put it on in such a way.
136
00:20:47,835 --> 00:20:50,599
You can hide behind them.
137
00:21:15,496 --> 00:21:17,555
Here's your lamb.
138
00:21:19,433 --> 00:21:21,993
Let me take it
some other time, ok?
139
00:21:39,086 --> 00:21:42,078
Hello, hello captain nemo!
140
00:21:43,290 --> 00:21:45,588
So, i'm not captain nemo!
141
00:21:47,327 --> 00:21:49,454
- I'm a stray dog.
- A straight what?
142
00:21:49,563 --> 00:21:50,530
A dog.
143
00:21:52,966 --> 00:21:55,093
- Homeless.
- Where are you going?
144
00:21:56,136 --> 00:21:57,398
I've lost the sea.
145
00:21:57,971 --> 00:22:00,872
I'm searching for another,
but there isn't one.
146
00:22:02,075 --> 00:22:03,975
Are you married?
147
00:22:05,479 --> 00:22:07,504
- Me?
- Yes.
148
00:22:08,215 --> 00:22:10,410
- No, no.
- No?
149
00:22:12,886 --> 00:22:16,549
- My boat is my wife.
- Why?
150
00:22:17,591 --> 00:22:18,649
Oh, no!
151
00:22:19,092 --> 00:22:21,754
In our town there are
so many marriageable girls,
152
00:22:21,929 --> 00:22:23,157
it's unbelievable!
153
00:22:23,263 --> 00:22:27,962
We'll come and visit you, ok?
154
00:22:28,035 --> 00:22:31,198
Alright? You agree?
155
00:23:49,816 --> 00:23:54,879
- You okay?
- Where are you going, alexander?
156
00:23:55,088 --> 00:23:58,751
- Is it good? Go swim!
- I don't feel like it.
157
00:24:08,535 --> 00:24:11,698
Aha, the crazy guy is back!
158
00:24:12,739 --> 00:24:15,936
What's wrong, mama?
159
00:24:17,010 --> 00:24:21,174
- Where's veronica?
- Here somewhere.
What's up? A bit drunk?
160
00:24:21,248 --> 00:24:26,208
No, you blockhead!
She's in the bushes with a lover.
161
00:24:26,286 --> 00:24:29,389
What bushes? What lover?
Are you delirious?
162
00:24:29,389 --> 00:24:32,449
No, i'm not.
I know everything.
163
00:24:32,626 --> 00:24:34,617
- What do you know?
- Shut up!
164
00:24:43,070 --> 00:24:45,038
So beautiful.
165
00:24:49,876 --> 00:24:51,345
Beautiful?
166
00:24:51,345 --> 00:24:56,550
I ought to turn away,
but i can't. Such beauty!
167
00:24:56,550 --> 00:24:59,144
I'm coming closer.
168
00:26:28,308 --> 00:26:31,368
There's no love!
169
00:26:36,583 --> 00:26:37,607
There is!
170
00:26:38,285 --> 00:26:39,809
No, there isn't!
171
00:26:40,754 --> 00:26:43,518
Yes, there is!
172
00:26:53,433 --> 00:26:57,096
Have you seen
sibylla anywhere?
173
00:26:57,738 --> 00:27:00,730
Your little tart is busy
pulling someone's pants down.
174
00:28:15,315 --> 00:28:18,876
Who's that bird in the photo?
Your grandma?
175
00:28:21,988 --> 00:28:26,118
One day grandpa caught her with
the husband of the laundry-woman.
176
00:28:38,438 --> 00:28:39,405
Can you see better now?
177
00:28:47,514 --> 00:28:49,539
How terribly!
178
00:29:00,193 --> 00:29:02,127
My husband!
179
00:29:05,298 --> 00:29:08,461
I'm about to be unfaithful,
and there he is having a shave.
180
00:29:09,603 --> 00:29:12,629
But you told me you
were a lonely woman
181
00:29:12,706 --> 00:29:14,833
on the lookout for a man.
182
00:29:15,709 --> 00:29:18,872
I am a lonely woman!
183
00:29:40,433 --> 00:29:43,027
Now i know where my cigars go!
184
00:29:48,975 --> 00:29:51,068
Into the kitchen. Come on!
185
00:29:51,211 --> 00:29:54,180
Into the kitchen? Now?
186
00:29:56,349 --> 00:29:57,338
Why?
187
00:30:02,122 --> 00:30:03,646
Come on!
188
00:30:08,061 --> 00:30:09,494
Get out of here!
189
00:30:12,265 --> 00:30:13,698
Let go of my hand!
190
00:30:15,068 --> 00:30:17,093
- Stop it!
- No.
191
00:30:17,237 --> 00:30:19,398
Bloody little bitch!
192
00:30:19,606 --> 00:30:21,039
Let go of my hand!
193
00:30:25,845 --> 00:30:27,904
Little girls don't behave like that!
194
00:30:29,015 --> 00:30:32,041
I don't give a damn
how little girls behave!
195
00:30:32,886 --> 00:30:34,251
I love you.
196
00:30:34,955 --> 00:30:39,324
And i won't let any other woman
have you! Do you understand?
197
00:30:40,493 --> 00:30:44,520
I'm an adult and can do
everything for you they can.
198
00:30:45,598 --> 00:30:47,463
Got it?
199
00:31:09,022 --> 00:31:11,115
Fire!
200
00:31:21,835 --> 00:31:25,965
15 - 23! 16! Ready! Aim!
201
00:31:26,106 --> 00:31:27,095
Fire!
202
00:31:41,721 --> 00:31:43,120
Ready! Aim!
203
00:31:45,025 --> 00:31:48,085
- 19 - 68!
- Fire!
204
00:31:50,730 --> 00:31:52,823
Ah, my back!
205
00:32:13,253 --> 00:32:15,414
I'm ok. Oh, dammit!
206
00:33:54,387 --> 00:33:55,615
You see?
207
00:33:58,391 --> 00:34:00,859
You really hurt me.
Right here.
208
00:34:00,994 --> 00:34:04,054
Mickey! He's over there.
209
00:34:55,215 --> 00:34:59,311
I've been looking
for you for two days.
210
00:35:00,353 --> 00:35:02,344
What are you doing here?
211
00:35:02,522 --> 00:35:04,513
They don't want to sting me.
212
00:35:06,092 --> 00:35:07,684
- Let's go.
- Leave me alone.
213
00:35:20,106 --> 00:35:22,165
Wait, wait! Do you hear me?
214
00:35:23,276 --> 00:35:26,379
- Please stop!
- I don't want to see you.
215
00:35:26,379 --> 00:35:28,438
Listen to me! Wait!
216
00:35:29,549 --> 00:35:33,076
You and me are the main thing!
Wait! Listen!
217
00:35:33,186 --> 00:35:35,711
- Enough.
- You idiot!
218
00:35:36,823 --> 00:35:39,025
Wait. Are you listening?
219
00:35:39,025 --> 00:35:41,960
Tell me what you
want me to do.
220
00:35:42,095 --> 00:35:45,131
Tell me, and i'll do it.
221
00:35:45,131 --> 00:35:47,233
Marry veronica!
222
00:35:47,233 --> 00:35:52,034
Which veronica?
But she's married to the lieutenant.
223
00:35:52,205 --> 00:35:55,299
Then marry maria, the chemist,
224
00:35:55,675 --> 00:35:59,509
or that idiot sappho.
I don't care who. Just get married!
225
00:36:03,483 --> 00:36:04,814
Will you marry me?
226
00:36:06,219 --> 00:36:08,653
My father is getting married too.
227
00:36:09,756 --> 00:36:10,745
What?
228
00:36:11,958 --> 00:36:14,426
Sappho and he
are old school friends.
229
00:36:15,194 --> 00:36:17,924
He wants to marry
that sleepy-headed idiot?
230
00:36:18,197 --> 00:36:20,290
He's at her place right now.
231
00:36:21,868 --> 00:36:24,268
Actually i quite like her.
232
00:36:42,588 --> 00:36:46,115
Alexander!
Alexander!
233
00:37:16,389 --> 00:37:18,482
Oh you idiot!
234
00:37:31,137 --> 00:37:33,765
It's been ages since i last danced.
235
00:37:36,676 --> 00:37:37,938
Thank you, alexander.
236
00:37:38,277 --> 00:37:42,111
Here's a toast
to you wonderful ladies!
237
00:37:57,764 --> 00:37:59,755
Let's go!
238
00:37:59,899 --> 00:38:01,934
Where are you off to, captain?
239
00:38:01,934 --> 00:38:05,301
Don't give that idiot
any more to drink!
240
00:38:05,371 --> 00:38:09,501
- Where are you going?
- Where is he going?
241
00:38:10,576 --> 00:38:12,305
So many beautiful women here!
242
00:39:45,972 --> 00:39:49,169
I'll give you a night...
243
00:39:51,644 --> 00:39:56,411
i'll give you a night like you've
never had before, my love.
244
00:40:01,554 --> 00:40:04,387
I'll give myself to you.
245
00:40:04,957 --> 00:40:10,657
I'm dying of desire to love you.
246
00:40:13,032 --> 00:40:16,900
I want every bit of you.
247
00:40:17,236 --> 00:40:21,036
My love.
248
00:40:34,687 --> 00:40:37,121
Leave me alone!
Please!
249
00:41:00,279 --> 00:41:02,873
Micky!
250
00:41:47,526 --> 00:41:49,494
Captain!
251
00:41:52,231 --> 00:41:53,755
Captain!
252
00:42:48,654 --> 00:42:53,318
Sibylla left, she sailed away
and out of my life...
253
00:42:54,393 --> 00:42:57,453
73 times i kissed
her that summer,
254
00:42:57,530 --> 00:43:00,397
though she said
i was allowed 100...
255
00:43:01,801 --> 00:43:05,032
where have those
27 kisses gone...
256
00:43:08,207 --> 00:43:10,004
fire!
17687
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof