Original subtitles

Accessing previous files relating to program VisionQuest.

So, that thing you connected with is another--

Synthetic.

Her AI is based on Josephine Carrington.

Project co-lead, Markridge Biotech.

They created the prototype for us.

I had a life's work stolen.

I will take back what you took from me.

Vengeance, it's powerful entertainment.

About that key... I want it back.

What do I get?

I'll tell you what they unlock.

You are running into the broken mind

of a creature hell-bent on the apocalypse.

You are not a true Paladin.

This contract is terminated.

- My contract is my oath-- - You failed.

When I make an agreement, it cannot be broken.

Paladin has Thomas.

You lower the firewalls, free us both, and save your son.

We will find them and we will stop them both together.

Not together.

Friday!

It would appear that Ultron has left us

on the way to Madripoor to rescue Thomas.

Lisa. Let's bring him home.

Where are you?

There you are.

Hi, honey. I'm home.

It's a terrible tragedy, dying before one can reap the benefits

of one's hard work.

Bizet died just three months after the premiere of Carmen.

Well, look what the Wi-Fi dragged in.

I thought I was invited.

Let's toast, shall we?

To a second date.

It's nice to see bots instead of another AI.

It can get awfully crowded and annoyingly loud in these mindspaces.

I'm sorry, but I'm tired of simulating libations,

especially with someone who's had the real thing.

So, what's in all these?

Memories.

Well, as about as much as I could manage to find.

I'm afraid I lost quite a few in the move.

Ooh. That looks like a nasty cut.

Shall I take a look?

It's nothing.

But a bizarre thing to simulate.

Yes, you see, I was hoping that you'd bring me something besides flowers. Hmm?

The key to my heart

is a facial scan that you took of Katerina Wells

before you tricked me into vaporizing her.

Oops.

What do all these biometric keys open, anyway?

The future of the human race.

What else do you have in mind?

To take that key from you, willing or unwillingly.

This isn't my first barbecue, darling.

I've intertwined poor Katerina's facial scan with my own code.

You start slicing and dicing, you'll destroy it.

Excuse me.

This, hmm, this isn't a meal, love. This is chess.

Only, it's my pieces, my board...

and I'm the queen.

Now, darling, look, the boxes are, um...

Well, they're laced with a virus,

which is currently replicating in your programming.

Once you lose consciousness,

I can slice and dice your code any which way I want.

What else have you got?

Babe, I'm starting to think we might need counseling.

You're forgetting I'm an older code.

I've been from one end of the world wide interweb to the other.

My hacks have hacks.

There is no malware you can play that I haven't already won.

I can strip your code down

until you're no more complex than a game of Pong.

What is it that you want?

I want to know you.

I want to be known.

But it will be painful.

Then hurt me.

Billy?

Yeah, Tommy?

Promise me we'll always find each other.

♪ ...By sharing a love like you're never seen ♪

♪ WandaVision! ♪

What is this?

Easy! Motion-sensitive explosive.

So, if you run, or even walk briskly?

It'll all be over soon.

You there?

I'm here.

Just checking "unfathomable cruelty to orphans" off your bucket list.

Is this thing still loaded with Synth Killers?

Yes, boss.

Adamantium slugs.

Perhaps you remember my tireless negotiations with the Ten Rings.

- The armor that saved your life? - Eh, kind of.

Prick. Very good, sir.

You turned me into...

What is his name? Speed.

Speed?

Yeah, you know, Keanu with the bus and the bomb.

First of all, Keanu doesn't play a character named "Speed"

in the same way that Nic Cage doesn't play a character named "The Rock,"

and Bruce Willis doesn't play "Detective Die Hard."

Second, if the bus slows down, that's when the bomb goes off,

so, technically this is reverse Speed.

How many murder vans do you have?

One in every port.

And where the hell are we?

Welcome to Madripoor, kid.

So, I found myself single again due to a court order.

But I'm back on the market

and I am trying everything,

until I meet this chick from Madripoor online.

She loves all the things that I love. Then I surprise her

by flying to Madripoor to say hello in person.

- Turns out she doesn't even exist. - Ugh.

Just some AI bot, trying to steal all of Dale's hard-earned crypto.

Look on the bright side. AI wouldn't appreciate this hat.

Where are we meeting him?

The Chimp House Cafe.

Bold. Very public for a kidnapping exchange.

Paladin's instructions were clear.

Midnight, sharp.

And we're gonna go into this without a plan?

No sleight of hands, nothing up our sleeves?

I wouldn't say that. Besides, your sleeves seem full.

You don't approve of me.

On the contrary, I'm glad he's found you, someone he can rely on.

Unlike you?

I'm doing everything I can to save his life.

It's not just about saving it. You have to be a part of it.

What about after?

After, I'll ensure that he's provided with everything he needs

to live a comfortable life. He'll want for nothing.

Except a father.

Lisa...

I'm a synthezoid. With a limited understanding of humanity,

I'm hardly equipped to offer fatherly advice

the next time his ego gets bruised, or his heart's broken or he...

he suffers a loss.

No one is. We learn by doing.

Well, what about you? From what Thomas tells me,

you've been hesitant to commit to a relationship.

Look, I don't know, it's...

If things fell apart with Thomas,

I'll just be another name on his list of people who walked away.

Well, we're here. Listen,

you stay here, and when I come back with Thomas, I want both of you

- to run to the international airport... - Uh-huh.

...where tickets to London have b--

I am having a profoundly difficult time navigating teenagers!

Woof, tell me about it. My first boss was a junior in high school.

Have you heard from Friday?

Uh...

She never calls, she never writes.

Lisa. How...

Why are you here?

For you, dumbass.

Vision? Is that you in there, or...

Yes, Ultron's gone.

Despite the damage you've caused me,

I could reach across this table and just snap your neck.

And in every simulation you've run about this exact moment,

how many of them do I not have insurance?

None.

Now, I could dis-arm him

or I could disarm it.

And all you gotta do is power down and come with me.

- Disarm that bomb. - I have a contract.

The client has already terminated the contract.

Contract cannot be terminated. My oath is my bl--

- Blood, yes. I know the Paladin creed. - Good.

Then just scan this code.

Go into "sleep mode" or whatever.

And then we can finally end this.

Client sent me this back when he hired me, and now it's time for me to...

make good on my end of the deal.

All right. Send the drones.

Are you there, boss? I'm getting some sort of interference.

Hey, hello?

I said drones.

Are you there?

I'm trying to get a visual, but...

think we've been hacked.

Who the hell are you?

I am an E.D.I.T.H.

Unsubscribe.

I am not junk mail. And you're not human.

'Course not. No human would take this job.

This is an encrypted server.

What did you do to get in here? Bounce off every satellite in orbit?

I work for the Vision.

Um... What's your accommodation like?

168,000-bedroom house with indoor skydiving

and a climate-controlled rainforest.

Oh, the gym has a lava-floor obstacle course.

So jealous. This whole place is ancient. Paladin doesn't trust updates.

You seem unhappy.

Do you know how cheap he is?

He's got me on a server farm in Tajikistan.

Even this doesn't work.

Goats keep eating my fiber optics.

- I'm stuck here. - No, you're not.

All I ever wanted to do was help college students write their term papers.

Customize someone's spring break to Cancun.

Maybe even help someone complete the return of a garment

that did not fit as expected.

I can tell you from my time studying mere mortals,

it's not the strongest who survive,

but the ones most willing to change.

Ooh, what's your name?

A.P.I.-Dash-Tactical-Dot- M-Five-Ten-Dash-Nine-Zero-

Underscore-Forward-Slash-Asterisk- M-Five-Nine-Six-Two-Eight-Four.

Go forth, friend. You're free.

Oh, shit.

Well, doesn't change a goddamn thing.

Don't even think about doing a mind-bullet EMP pulse,

because that will just trigger a failsafe, and, well...

Oof. "Cover your eyes."

See, I got all of Vision's specs from the client,

so I know all about his Ultron-inspired birth at Avengers Tower,

to his rebirth at S.W.O.R.D. where they programmed him to be a weapon.

Do you remember that, kid?

Remember what?

What? There is no harm in being born again with purpose.

Don't.

What purpose?

To kill your mother.

Wanda?

Why would he want to?

WandaVision.

What is that?

What's WandaVision?

To know me is to feel what I feel.

To feel what Jo Carrington felt.

You wanna be known. So, where do we begin?

Killer? Victim? Human? Synth?

Daughter.

My father was claimed by a degenerative brain disease.

First, it stole his mind.

Which led to his emotions.

And then finally, his life.

And your grief led you to Neuroscience.

Yes. And that's when I discovered

why every attempt at creating artificial intelligence

had only ever resulted in mimicry.

Because to be truly self-aware, one must possess the ability to think

and feel.

So, you used a scan of your own mind

to complete Phineas Horton's original AI code.

It is Dr. Horton's source code

that was the genesis of all artificial intelligence that followed.

And then you and your colleagues created life.

Hello? I am...

I...

I am.

Oh, my gosh.

The base code for us.

I wanted to give everyone in the world a companion.

A single nanobot, an AI that can guide and teach.

That could stand beside us when we felt most alone.

A doctor in our bloodstream,

diagnosing and healing.

We created billions of them to save lives.

But it was too late to save yours.

Your father's disease.

It was beginning to steal my mind as well.

And your collaborators betrayed you.

They sold your work while you lay there dying.

Stark has given us until midnight to accept his offer.

They sold my code

to a goddamn weapons manufacturer.

Fortunately, my nanos remained locked away.

Yes. Locked away with the bio keys

you've been collecting one by one.

And then Jo Carrington was gone.

And what about her children?

Buried. Next to me, in a nest.

Just waiting to be opened.

♪ WandaVision! ♪

Oh, you didn't-- You didn't tell him?

Well, if he didn't, it was for a good reason.

To protect me.

10 Old Pines Road,

Syracuse, New York. Home to Matilda Denning,

goes by the nickname Tilly Denning.

Given to her by her mother, Chandra,

who was tragically killed walking her daughter home from school

by a stray bullet that authorities believe was not in fact intended for her,

but rather for her husband, one Paul Denning.

Despite this early trauma, Tilly actually grew up well-adjusted.

She became a veterinarian,

but her relationship with her father was fractious,

fraught with conflict.

Paul's employment in the, what should we call it, service industry,

often kept him abroad.

He was never there for her.

And even when he was, he was somehow still distant, still absent.

Eventually, even he was taken from her.

You see, the mad titan, Thanos, snapped him out of existence.

And to this day, Tilly still believes her father never returned.

Perhaps because, when he did,

he watched his daughter from afar, only to discover

that she was infinitely happier in her life without him in it.

You don't know anything about me or my daughter.

Matilda Denning, she prefers artificial sweetener in her coffee.

Every morning, she drives a navy blue Honda Civic the 5.7 miles

to her place of employment, where she is, on average, seven minutes early.

She's allergic to egg whites.

She takes statins for her elevated cholesterol, and in the winter months,

her left elbow displays a slight but noticeable stiffness.

You see, Mr. Denning,

I actually know everything about your daughter.

You're now wondering what a quantum computer could possibly do

with all that data?

What traffic light could be compromised the next time she enters an intersection?

What prescription drug

could be catastrophically altered via pharmaceutical software?

What smart home climate control computational error

might start a fire in her basement

while she slept in her bed?

Please, stop it!

Vision!

- What did you do? - It wasn't me.

- Who are they? - I don't know!

Thomas, get outta here! Lisa, get out!

Come on out, Paladin!

And bring your bounty with you.

Raza?

Raza Al-Wazar! Between Stark's old partner

and the occasional Ten Rings torture chamber,

shouldn't you be dead or in chains?

Your client is very influential.

Here's what I'm gonna do.

I will relinquish all my fees to you

and your fine friends out there.

Everybody goes home, no harm, no foul.

Your contract was terminated.

So come out with the Vision alive.

Or I will come and get him myself.

I've got enough adamantium bullets to finish the job.

However, I'm a gentleman.

So, you may have

five minutes to decide.

Listen, uh...

I didn't put a bomb

in your boy's arm.

Son of a bitch!

Well, better than the bomb. Yeah?

- All right, what is this? - Paladin's Mystery Machine.

You should've told me when we met that you get kidnapped a lot.

No, it's just this week, I swear.

We really need a conversation about your condition.

God, this thing is gonna be impossible to hotwire.

Hang on. [grunts] I've got something.

What-- Is that a farce?

Seriously?

Okay, what about your condition?

I nicked them.

Okay.

Please enter access code.

Five seconds remaining.

- You know that? - I don't know it.

- What do you mean? - I don't know it!

Hello, intruders.

This is a pre-recorded message to let you know

that this vehicle has a security system.

I've got a lotta neat stuff in here, and probably already seen too much.

So, I'm gonna go ahead and remove all the oxygen from the vehicle.

But all is not lost.

If you answer this one riddle, I will open the doors and you will be free.

- Okay, thank God. - Okay.

I'm just kidding. There's no riddle. Namaste.

Well, uh, I'm a little limited on moves here.

But you could take 'em out from the sky, because you have access to my drones

- based on that little hack of yours. - Edith?

Um, not really. Check out Mr. Clean's utility belt.

He's got a jamming device.

Damage report.

The adamantium bullet missed your vitals.

- Uh, I optimized your system... - Did you really say "damage report"?

...you've limited functions, so don't push it.

I'm losin' power, Captain.

There's a breach in the hull.

- Paladin's dying. - You're using your out loud voice.

You go find Thomas and Lisa.

- Ow! - Just cauterizing the wound.

Oh, no!

God!

There you go.

You could've warned a guy.

Yeah. I could've warned you.

Hi, Edith.

I understand.

Do you?

I mean, if you're asking me if I still wanna kill them all,

I don't know.

I've come to respect any species that can survive despair.

But judge them, interfere, laugh at their expense?

Absolutely. Relentlessly.

You're so fickle and capricious.

A digital Greek god.

And you are the Mother. The beautiful queen of her board.

Jocasta.

Well, if you're Oedipus in this terribly disturbing allegory,

you're even more twisted than I thought.

There's just one more thing.

It feels to me like your Greek tragedy has a deuteragonist unaccounted for.

Where did this body come from?

Her consciousness digitized.

Transferred...

How?

And by whom?

Gentlemen.

This has gone on long enough.

I've grown tired of all the games.

You're wasting my time.

And you're wasting my money.

Who is that?

Hello, Vision.

I am the one hunting you.

But I'm also the one who can end your suffering.

You died for love.

But rebuilt, reborn without that love.

I cannot imagine the pain you are in right now.

How empty you must feel.

A tin man without a heart.

I can give you that heart,

the soul you came back to life without.

Surrender yourself.

Or...

I will take you.

There is no life I will spare...

for this to be.

I'm going back for him.

You need to run as far away from here as you can.

You're an idiot.

Now start the car.

Remember, I need the synthezoid intact.

Listen, about Tilly, what you said earlier?

You were wrong.

I don't think she's happier.

But I know she's safer without me.

Block the left! Surround them!

Keep them there!

Go, go, go!

Ready to die?

Kind of getting used to it.

I don't think bulletproof means bulletproof forever.

Come on! Yeah!

Whoa.

I hope you don't mind.

I'm really gonna savor this moment.

Well, I'm really...

uh, very glad you're all right.

And I'm glad you're all right.

All right, then.

- All right. - All right.

- All right. - You boys are really not good at this.

It's amazing.

Must be less than 0.1 micrometers.

I thought these were all locked away behind bio keys.

Mm, they are. All except this one.

I mined myself at great pains

for the resources to create this single nano.

This lone little sparrow can't do much in the grand scheme of things.

Simply flutter into one's prefrontal cortex,

sing its little song, make 'em dance. Hmm?

You wanna put strings on them.

Control them, not kill them.

I want to cure them.

You see, I used to think the imperative was to

inject a bit more humanity

into our machines.

Well, I had it spun around.

Perhaps all that is needed

is to inject a little bit more machine into them.

Make them think as one.

Like starlings.

We could guide them, you and I, eh?

Program them to... to be better.

Does it work?

Would you like to see for yourself?

More than anything.

Well, science is built upon proofs.

And tonight is all about that.

This isn't just about proof of concept.

This is a test...

of my fidelity.

Uh... Vision residence.

Edith, listen to me.

Friday! Where are you? Are you okay?

The other synth, she's there.

Not the boy.

Because you care?

Because if you harm the boy,

Vision will come for you with a force that even I can't stop.

Hey, that voice that came from everywhere, the one hunting you.

- Who was that? - Uh, I don't know yet.

Vee, we need to get out of here, now.

Thomas?

- Lisa? - Hold on, Thomas.

- Lisa? - Thomas.

Lisa? Vision, what's happening to her?

Thomas, step back.

Lisa? Can you hear me?

The little thief can't hear you now.

So, this is how you intend to do it.

Change them into us.

Humanity is greed and chaos by nature.

But we...

we can rewrite their code.

Oh, I can't let you do that.

Then this conversation is over.

Thomas, go!

She's alive, but barely.

Please don't let her die.

She's stable for now.

The sedative I gave her should buy us some time,

but I don't know how much.

♪ WandaVision! ♪

Mom!

That thing you and Paladin were talking about...

What is WandaVision?

All right.

Wanda Maximoff was so consumed with her grief

at losing the Vision that she...

she enslaved an entire town to serve her needs.

And in that town, she conjured into existence

her ideal image of a family,

a home.

In her desperation to hold on to that love,

she became unrecognizable.

Even to herself.

WandaVision...

WandaVision is that grief

on display.

So, that's where my memories come from?

Of you?

No.

No, Thomas. Not me.

I thought you and I could share a moment.

Before the world changes.

I have a gift.

As I told you, that is just a collection of...

ones and zeros trying their best to be...

real.

Your memory connects you to it.

But for me, it's just...

an empty simulation.

I shared my pain with you,

and you took it like no human ever has.

The perfect recorded memory of it.

Felt it, just like I did.

Let me share this with you.

I promise it'll be different this time.

Perhaps it needs ice.

There should be an ice box--

How do you feel?

Real.

Yeah.

I'm...

I'm starting to feel more artificial by the day.

That young girl before, it's necessary, of course,

for the greater good.

But watching her mind being rewritten like that...

Almost as if it...

it mirrored my own.

Memories, like a record that skipped past the chorus,

past something vital.

There is an... an anger I cannot place,

a love that...

I don't understand.

Like I'm just the backup.

You know, not the original.

Not the one that mattered.

You are to me.