Original subtitles

Hi! I'm Patrick Star!

And I live with my parents!

-Ow!

This is my dad!

This is my mom!

This is my sister! She's shy.

Hey, wait a minute.

I'm not shy.

My pen just broke.

Patrick? Patrick?

Whatever. That pen is coming out of the budget.

And speaking of budgets.

The Patrick Show is seriously in the hole

this season!

We need some money quick!

And with Patrick gone, I guess it's up to me.

And what better way to rake in piles of dough

than selling advertisements?

-Woo-hoo!

Phew! This equipment is heavy.

-Hi, Squidina!

Do you think maybe I was the one making your stuff so heavy?

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Whatcha doing in my equipment, SpongeBob?

Well, I was just thinking I could help you

with your TV stuff today?

Are you qualified?

Nope. But I'm cheap!

You got yourself a job! First things first.

Howzabout you do something about my gear?

Sir, yes, ma'am!

Nicely done.

-Okay, SpongeBob. -Ooh!

-Today we're making commercials. -Ah! Ooh!

If we stay focused and don't get distracted,

we'll wrap before dinner.

And be careful with that camera, alright?

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Bubble Bass, the door!

I know, Mother!

And have you gotten rid of those toys yet?!

I'm working on it right now!

Mother is doing some spring cleaning

and has requested that I sell some of my figurines.

You may be directing,

but I have final say over this little advertisement.

Understood?

You're the boss.

And take a look at this, folks. Isn't that wonderful?

This Ooze Crew is unopened, mint in box, and is--

Not for sale!

Okay.

-Well, folks, how about this?

Sixteen points of articulation,

hand-painted and--

Not for sale!

Not for sale. Not for sale. Not for sale!

I don't understand, Bubble Bass.

Do you want us to move this junk or not?

What do you think?

You're going to love this next one, folks.

This is a one of a kind, customized doll--

Action figure!

And, folks, take a look.

Just check out these hand-crafted details.

Mm. Gorgeous.

And these teeth-crafted details. Wow.

Act fast, folks, 'cause this doll is one of a kind.

Call now, and we'll throw in a bottle of hand sanitizer,

which you'll need after touching any of these toys!

Hurry, folks.

-Ooh! A caller!

Hello? You're on the air!

If you know what's good for you,

you'll stop selling those action figures.

Cut it out, Bubble Bass.

We know it's you.

Oop.

Guess the TV remote is somewhere else.

-If you like Mermaid Man,

you're gonna love this next--

Sorry, Squidina. Hold on.

I'm picking up some sort of whistling on the mic.

Tartar sauce, where is that coming from?

You feelin' alright, Bubble Bass?

Yes.

I'm completely normal.

-Coochie, coochie, coo! -Wait!

My hidden figurines!

Don't worry, fellas, Daddy's coming!

I will never, never let you go.

No. Mwah!

No, no, no.

You!

Put those down!

I changed my mind.

We are not selling my figurines.

Bubble Bass!

Did you get rid of your dolls like I asked?

Well, funny you should mention that. You see--

No, no!

No!

No!

Why?!

And that's a wrap!

Hand it over, you no-good, lazy--

Not my Barnacle Boy, Mother!

That was fun.

It was a nightmare.

Ugh, hopefully the next job won't driveme crazy.

Oh-kay!

Ready to shoot your commercial, Mrs. Puff?

I could use a little powder.

Makeup!

Awesome!

SpongeBob? Time to lower the boom mic!

Boom!

Okay, Mrs. Puff! Floor it!

And action!

Hello, folks!

Do you wanna learn how to drive?

I'm Mrs. Puff and I can teach ya!

Just come on down to Mrs. Puff's Boating School!

SpongeBob! I can't see!

We can edit that out!

Just keep going!

At Mrs. Puff's Boating School,

we pride ourselves on safe driving.

Yah!

You know what? Let's try that line again.

And this time, lose the "Yah!"

Okay?

Okay. Okay.

At Mrs. Puff's Boating School, we pride ourselves on safe--

Yah!

SpongeBob!

I said we're not doing the "Yah!"

Yeah, I know.

But we're headed straight

towards the Mariana Trench.

Oh!

Brake! Brake! Brake!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Wah! Wah!

Don't worry! We'll fix it in post!

-Get 10% off your first lesson!

Visit my website and use the promo code "Drive Safe"!

That went well.

Yup! Another commercial in the can.

I can't believe I didn't puff up due to stress.

Way to go, Mrs. Puff!

Here's my invoice.

Thank you.

Oh my.

Well, this is it.

The final commercial of the day!

I have been expecting you.

Right this way.

Nosferatu!

Nosferatu welcomes you.

Anyhoo, how can we help you today, Slappy?

We need a commercial to help lure new victims--

I mean, visitors to spend the night here.

Okay, well, let's see how your boy looks on camera.

Nosferatu doesn't appear on video.

We're gonna have to recast him.

Maybe it's for the better.

I mean, this whole place could use some rebranding.

Whatever it takes to get some warm bodies up in here.

Are you tired of the same

-old, boring, family vacations? - Yes.

Do you like creepy, old castles?

Yes.

Then you'll wanna come visit...

Nosferatu's Family Fun Castle!

Experience the magic

of spending the night in a castle

where nothing weird or bad ever happens!

It's true!

Relax and unwind

in any of our 200 spacious, modern rooms.

Visit our spa for a relaxing massage.

Or try an acupuncture session.

Fantastic.

Take a dip in our giant indoor swimming pool!

Or enjoy our lovely sauna.

Plus, lots of big, squeaky doors

with fun surprises inside!

Surprises are fun!

Take Exit 6 off the Transylvania Turnpike.

We're gonna have fun!

Nosferatu's actual appearance may vary.

So what'd ya think?

He loved it!

Yay!

When will the commercial air?

It just did.

-Oh...

Well, I guess our work here is done!

This will be a night to remember!

We made bank shooting all those ads today!

That's terrific, Squidina!

Oh, by the way,

I had to join the Scream Actors Guild

to play Nosferatu.

Here's my invoice.

Huh, I guess she is shy.

Hi, I'm Patrick Star!

Hi, I'm Patrick Star!

And I live with my parents!

-Ow!

This is my dad!

This is my mom!

This is my sister! She's shy.

This is my grandpa!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Outta my way! Runaway scooter!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Whoa!

-Ow!

At long last.

After countless millennia,

I shall finally reap

the elusive GrandPat Star.

Huh?

What?

Hey! Stay still, old man!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Oh!

Never, never get me!

Uh, never, never get me! Uh, never, never get me!

Ooh-hoo-hoo!

Hey. Don't cry, big guy.

It's not like someone died.

That's just it. No one died!

I'm losing my touch.

You look like you could use a day off.

Oh, I couldn't.

My boss would kill me.

Oh, nonsense.

I have the perfect place for you to decompose,

I-I mean, decompress.

Here.

Rest your weary bones.

Okay.

But who's gonna do my job?

Hey! Huh?

I always wanted to play with one of these.

Let me take care of it.

Alright.

Are you sure Granny Tentacles is okay with me

staying at her place?

Oh yeah.

I nap here all the time.

But just in case she peeks out the window...

There!

She'll think you're me.

Whose soul should we reap first?

Maybe that rotten kid

who gave me a wet-willy in grade school.

Stick to the list.

Okay. Let's see.

First up is...

GrandPat!

-Ah!

I-I mean...

Old Man Walker.

Alright, off to work.

Make yourself comfortable, ya lazy bones.

Hi.

Uh...

How come you're not afraid of me?

I'm a bus driver.

I face death every day.

Fair enough.

Keep the meter runnin'!

Hmm. No response, eh?

It is time, old friend,

to meet your maker.

Can this wait until after my program?

Uh, well... I-I guess so.

Uh, will this be over soon?

Not by a long shot.

How much is it worth?

Up to three dollars.

You know what, I'll just come back later.

Sucker.

Hmm. Let's see.

Who's next?

Squidward Tentacles?! Perfect!

This time of day, that dweeb

is usually terrorizing people at the park

with his clarinet playing!

This'll be a piece of cake!

Uh-huh.

Squidward Tentacles!

It is I, the exterminating angel!

Harbinger of Death!

-Reaper of souls!

I have come for you!

But I have so much to live for!

Oh, not if I have anything to say about it!

Excuse me, gruesome.

Didn't you see the line?

-Yeah! -No cuts!

Now get to the back!

No way! Death gets first dibs!

Hey! This guy's trying to cut the line!

Get 'im!

Ow! Ow!

Ooh, that kinda tickles.

May I?

-Wah!

Behind the yellow line, sir.

This reaper business is a lot harder

than I thought it would be.

Oh, who's next?

Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy?!

Oh, those two fossils'll be easy!

Yellow line.

Don't make me say it again.

The Mermalair!

It is I!

-The Grim Reaper!

Intruder alert. Intruder alert.

Ha!

Nana-nana-booboo!

Maybe I oughta skip the introduction this time.

Bingo.

Let's get this over with.

Oh, now what?!

Huh?!

Nap time protection mode.

Activated.

Oof!

Uncle! Uncle!

Lemme go, please!

You'll never see me again, I swear it!

Yow!

- Yellow line! -Oof!

Watch your step, have a nice day now.

- You!

It's your time...

card.

Denise needs your timecard.

Unless you don't wanna get paid.

Huh?

Oh. A timecard.

Who are you again?

Your boss!

And seriously, you are waybehind schedule!

You haven't reaped any souls in months!

Ah, let's see. Who was on your list for today?

GrandPat. Hah!

That old crust has evaded us for eons!

Where could he be hiding?

Uh...

Ah!

You okay, Bill?

Never better, Boss!

'Cause I know exactly where GrandPat is!

Let's go!

Wow! He's wasted away to skin and bones.

Minus the skin.

Well, go ahead!

-Are you sure?

That ol' feller and I go back a long ways.

Oh, for Neptune's sake!

What the...?

Not sure how this works.

But I'll take it.

Didn't you take the HR course

about getting too attached to your assignments?

Yeesh! Well, better him than me.

-Huh?

What has gotten into you, Bill?!

I'm not Bill!

I'm GrandPat!

And you reapers'll never get me!

Never, never get me! Never, never get me!

Never, never get me!

I shoulda listened to Mom and been a chiropractor.

Who's there?! Who's trespassin' on my property?!

Eep! That's my cue!

Yee-ouch!

Oh!

Yeah, I don't get it either.

-Oh well.

Nothin' lasts forever.

You again?!

I don't wanna see you in my afterlife!

Live!

Uh, never, never get me! Uh, never, never get me!

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0