Original subtitles

There we go...

I normally shut myself in at home,

but unusually for me, today I made up my mind to go out.

All to get my hands on the first-run limited edition

of a popular online game that goes on sale today.

A five-hour round trip! I'm glad I was able to buy it.

In-store exclusives, official or not, really are playing dirty.

This sunlight is my worst enemy after three straight all-nighters.

Time to get home and play the hell out of this.

A girl from my high school?

Look out! That truck's going to—

Why would I choose now, of all times,

to do something so out of character?

Satou Kazuma-san.

Welcome to the afterlife.

Unfortunately, you passed away moments ago.

Your life was a short one,

but you are, in fact, dead.

Just one question...

What about the girl I pushed out of harm's way?

She's alive.

Thank goodness.

That means my death wasn't in vain.

Actually, she wouldn't have gotten hurt,

even if you hadn't pushed her out of the way.

Huh?

That tractor was going to stop before it hit her.

Huh? Wait a second.

What is it?

"Tractor"?

Yes, it was a tractor.

Huh? Then what happened?

Did I die by getting plowed over by a tractor?

No, you died of shock.

You mistakenly thought a truck ran over you.

I died of shock?!

I've been doing this for a long time,

but you're the first human to ever die in such a bizarre way.

I've never even met this girl before. What's her deal?

You were so terrified that you'd be run over, you wet yourself.

You passed out and were taken to a nearby hospital,

and the doctors and nurses laughed at you as you had a heart attack—

Stop! I don't wanna hear it!

I don't wanna hear it! I don't wanna hear it!

Your family just rushed to the hospital,

and now even they're laughing out loud at the cause of death.

Stop! Stop!

Well...

I've vented enough stress for now.

Damn her!

My name is Aqua.

I'm a goddess who guides humans who die young to the afterlife.

You have two choices.

You can start from square one with a new life,

or you can go to Heaven and carry on like an old man.

To tell you the truth,

Heaven isn't the dreamy place you all imagine it to be.

Huh?

Not only is there no TV, there are no manga or games, either.

You don't even have a physical body,

so you can't do anything sexual, either.

There's nothing to do there but bask in the sun for all eternity.

What?

Yeah, you don't want to go to a boring place like Heaven, do you?

Uh, right...

On the other hand, starting over from square one isn't so fun, either.

On that note, I've got a great offer for you.

You like games, don't you?

Huh?

That world, which has long enjoyed peace,

is being threatened by the Devil King's army!

The livelihoods its citizens have worked for are being trampled by monsters.

Everyone lives in fear of the Devil King's army's merciless pillage and slaughter!

...slaughter!

Since that's the sort of world it is, everyone refuses to be reborn,

so the population is declining.

I see...

So we decided, "Why not send people who've

died in other worlds there with their bodies and memories intact?"

What's the point in sending me there if I'm just going to be killed?

That's why I'm doing you a big favor.

I'm granting you the right to bring any one thing of your choosing with you.

It could be a powerful weapon, or a tremendous talent.

You'll be able to redo your life with all of your original memories.

To top it off, you can bring one thing of your choosing!

And the people of the parallel world

will earn someone battle-ready to help them.

Not a bad deal, don't you think?

Um, I want to ask something.

Will I be able to speak this other world's language?

That won't be an issue.

Parallel World Reincarnation Guide and Contract The First Ever Parallel World Guide! (For Shut-ins)

With the kind support of us gods,

we'll overload your brain so you'll be able to learn it instantly.

Caution! Because the process of installing the ability to speak the parallel world's language into the one who wishes to be reincarnated there (henceforth referred to as "Reincarnated") requires instantaneous overloading of the hippocampus and cerebral cortex (henceforth referred to as "Brain"), Reincarnated's Brain may, in rare cases, lose certain faculties (go "p**f"). Should this occur, according to Article 1296 Clauses 2 and 5 and Article 2051 Clause 3, Reincarnated may not hold those responsible for his reincarnation accountable.

As a side effect,

you might just go "poof" if you're unlucky, though.

So all that leaves you to do is to choose a powerful ability or piece of equipment.

I just heard you mention something really serious.

What do you mean, "poof"?

I never said that.

Yes, you did.

Now, choose!

I'll grant you one power that is second to none!

This is my gamer's intuition talking,

but all of the abilities and equipment here are totally broken!

If I'm going to a world where magic exists, I absolutely have to try it out!

Hey, hurry it up.

No matter what you pick, it's all the same.

Nobody's expecting much from a shut-in game otaku anyway.

I-I'm not an otaku!

And I died after leaving my house, so I'm not a shut-in, either!

None of that matters. Just hurry it up.

I've still got lots more deceased humans to guide, you know.

Damn her!

Getting all cocky just because she's a little bit cute...

"Hurry up and decide," huh?

I'll do just that, then.

Pick one thing to bring to this parallel world, right?

That's right.

Okay, I pick you.

All right, stand there and don't leave the magic circle—

What did you just say?

We have heard your request.

I shall take over your job from here on out, Aqua-sama.

Huh?

Satou Kazuma-san's wish complies with the regulations and has been accepted.

Hey, what is all this? Wh-What? You've got to be kidding.

No, no, no! Come on, um...

This is not right! Taking a goddess with you is against the rules!

It must be illegal! This has to be illegal!

Wait! Wait!

Please have a safe trip, Aqua-sama.

Should you successfully defeat the Devil King,

I will send someone to pick you up.

I may have the ability to heal since I'm a goddess,

but I have no fighting ability to speak of!

There's no way I can beat the Devil King!

Hey, wait!

How does it feel to get dragged away with the guy you treated like a total idiot?

You've been designated as the one thing I'll be bringing along,

so if you're a goddess, use your godly powers

or whatever to make my life as easy as possible!

No!

I don't want to go to a parallel world with a man like this!

Brave hero, I pray that of the great many prospective heroes,

you will be the one to defeat the Devil King.

If you do so, we shall grant any wish

you desire as a gift from the gods.

Whoa, for real?!

That's my line!

Now, go forth on your journey!

No!

The Town of Beginning Adventurers

The Town of Beginning Adventurers

Axel

The Town of Beginning Adventurers

Axel

The Town of Beginning Adventurers

Axel

The Town of Beginning Adventurers

Axel

It's a parallel world.

Hey, this really is a parallel world!

W-Wait, I'm really going to be using magic

and going on adventures in this world from now on?

Goodbye, shut-in life! Hello, new world!

I can really start anew in this world!

Hey, shut up.

What am I going to do if everyone thinks I'm friends with a crazy woman?

More importantly, isn't there something you're supposed to give me at a time like this?

Look at what I'm wearing. I'm in a tracksuit.

Here I am in a fantasy world, and all I have is a single tracksuit.

Isn't there a bare minimum of starter equipment I should—

Wh-What the heck?! Stop! Stop it!

I get it, okay?! I'm sorry!

If you hate it that much, then you can go home.

I'll work out the rest on my own.

What are you talking about?!

I'm in trouble because I can't go back!

What do I do? Huh? What am I gonna do?

What am I supposed to do from now on?!

Hey, calm down, Goddess.

Times like these call for guilds.

Going to places like that to gather intel is what you do in RPGs.

Huh? You're supposed to be some game otaku shut-in.

Why are you so reliable?

All right! Let's go, Goddess.

Hey, wait.

You can call me "Goddess" if you like,

but when you can, call me "Aqua," so we don't cause a commotion.

I get it.

If you're a goddess,

wouldn't you know where we can find an adventurer's guild?

I'm a goddess.

There's no way I'd know about every little lowly place like that.

This girl's useless...

Thanks for your business.

Thank you. Up we go...

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Adventurer's Guild

Looks like this is the place.

Scary!

Welcome! If you're here to eat, please take any open seat.

If you need job guidance, head to the counter inside.

Thank you.

Hey!

Haven't seen you around here before.

And what's with the weird clothes?

Oh, we've actually come a long way, and we just got into town.

I want to become an adventurer to fight the Devil King's army, too.

Is that right, you reckless punk?

Welcome to the gates of Hell!

If you're lookin' for the guild admission desk, it's over there.

Hey.

How can you make up a story like that on the spot?

Listen, Aqua.

Okay.

Today we'll register with a guild and find a place to stay the night.

G-Got it. I don't know anything about games,

but I guess that's how it works in worlds like this, right?

Exactly. All right, let's go.

Oh, wait.

You seem like such a capable guy.

Why were you a shut-in otaku with no friends or girlfriend before?

Why did you seclude yourself every day and act like such a shut-in NEET?

Stop calling me a shut-in NEET, you bitch.

Don't lump "shut-in" and "NEET" together.

Hello. What can I do for you today?

Um, we'd like to become adventurers.

I see.

In that case, you'll first need to pay the registration fee.

Sure, sure...

Huh? Registration fee?

Do you have any money?

You dragged me here without any warning.

Of course I don't.

This girl's useless...

Are you ready to order?

Um, I'm still thinking about it...

Please take your time.

Hey, what should we do?

We've already hit a roadblock.

Normally we'd get a minimal amount of equipment

and enough to cover basic living expenses, at least.

This is totally inhospitable.

There goes your reliability, just like that.

Well, I guess it was inevitable. You are a shut-in NEET.

Don't call me a shut-in NEET.

Fine. I guess it's my turn now.

Let me show you what a goddess can do!

You there, priest! State your denomination!

I'm Aqua.

Yes, the object of worship for the Religious Order of Axis: the goddess Aqua!

If thou art one of my followers...

It'd be a huge help if you could lend me some money!

I'm in the Eris Sect, actually...

Oh, you are? I'm sorry.

Oh, young lady, are you with the Axis Sect?

The relationship of the goddesses Aqua and Eris is that of superior and subordinate.

This must be fate. I saw earlier that you couldn't cover the fee, correct?

Here. Please consider this Eris-sama's divine blessing.

Still, no matter how devout a believer you are, you mustn't call yourself a goddess.

Uh, yes. I'm sorry.

Thank you very much...

He didn't even believe that I'm a goddess.

By the way, Eris is a goddess ranked beneath me.

A believer in my subordinate took pity on me

and lent me money...

Y-Yeah...

Um, we've brought the registration fee.

S-Sure...

Something told me she didn't want to make eye contact with us.

Allow me to formally explain.

Adventurers each have their own occupations.

This is your registration card.

It keeps track of how many monsters you've vanquished.

As your level increases, you'll earn points that you can use to learn skills,

so please work hard to raise your level.

Now, both of you, please hold your hands over this crystal.

Like this?

With this, you will each learn your current status,

so please choose your desired occupation based on your stats.

Here it comes!

Now my tremendous latent abilities will be made apparent,

and there'll be an uproar throughout the guild!

Yes, thank you very much.

Satou Kazuma-san, is it? Let me see...

Average across the board.

With the exception of decently high intelligence...

Oh? Your luck is extraordinarily high.

Of course, luck isn't a very essential stat for an adventurer...

With this much luck,

I'd recommend becoming a merchant or something similar...

Hey, she's disapproving of my adventurer's lifestyle right off the bat.

What's going on?

U-Um,

make my primary job "adventurer," please.

W-Well, you can always change jobs when you level up!

Y-You're right!

The weakest job, huh?

Aside from your intelligence being below average,

and your luck being the lowest possible level,

all of your stats are drastically above average!

What? Does that mean I'm really amazing?

A-Amazing is an understatement!

The mage class, which requires intelligence, is out of the question,

but other than that, you can be anything you want!

A crusader, sword master, arch priest...

Nearly any advanced class right from the start!

I see. It's a shame there's no "goddess" occupation,

but in my case, maybe I'll be an arch priest who heals her allies.

An arch priest!

An almighty class that commands all recovery and support magic,

and that boasts enough strength to stand at the front line!

Without further ado, welcome to our adventurer's guild, Aqua-sama.

All of our staff will be looking forward to your future exploits.

Starting off as an arch priest is incredible!

Someone like you might actually be able to beat the Devil King, you reckless girl!

No event like this is going to happen for me?

It's the adventurer's life for us starting today, Kazuma!

I thought you absolutely hated all this.

Did I?

Well, anyway, everything thus far has been basically character creation.

Now our adventure is finally about to begin!

Wait, this isn't right!

What isn't?

No, wait a second!

What's wrong? Did you forget to use the bathroom before bed?

It's dark. Want me to go with you?

No need! It's not that!

Keep it down!

W-We're sorry!

We didn't come here to be laborers.

Oh, that's right!

I need you to defeat the Devil King, or I'll never be able to go home!

Her intelligence stat was lower than a human's.

All of the monsters near town have been long since exterminated.

With no monsters, there's no need for anyone to give us any fetch quests.

I didn't want to learn something so realistic...

Thanks for your business!

What?

It's nothing.

Say...

I was just thinking.

Let's go away from here and do a kill quest.

We're level one. We don't even have full sets of equipment.

It'll be fine. As long as you have me around, it'll be over in a flash!

You can count on it!

I feel very uneasy about this.

Who do you think I am?

That's right. You are a goddess, after all.

Yeah! Leave it to me.

And so our adventure began,

for real this... time.

KONOSUBA God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!

KONOSUBA God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!

Episode 1

"This Self-Proclaimed Goddess and Reincarnation in Another World!"

Mom, I've come to a parallel world. I feel refreshed, as if I've been reborn. I've found a home and a job, and I'm full of energy. And best of all, a goddess has come along with me. So please don't worry about me. I'll be all right... I'll be all right... Probably...

Episode 2

An Explosion For This Chuunibyou!