Original subtitles

I'M NOT GOING TO DO ANYTHING

Welcome to the show. Such a great show tonight.

I tell you, I couldn't be more excited if I was Ross Kemp on Celebrity

Traitors.

Good luck.

Singing for us tonight, look over there, it's Suede.

Yeah.

They'll be singing their track, Dancing With The Europeans.

But first, on my sofa tonight, this comedian and sitcom star won a whopping

64 Daytime Emmy Awards with a hugely successful talk show, broke records with

a star-studded Oscars selfie, and as Dory invited Nemo, she told us all to

just keep swimming. It is a warm first-time welcome to Ellen DeGeneres!

I know!

There she is!

Hello! Oh, so good to see you.

This modern actor broke onto the scene in Humans and shot the famous Astrid in

the smash hit Crazy Rich Asians.

Now she brings us the heartbreaking drama Josephine. It's another first

time. Welcome to Gemma Chan!

This

Irish

star met his laughing in Bruges by... in the banshees of Innesherran and say,

that's Colin Farrell in The Penguin.

Now, he's running the Dublin Marathon with his friend and disability

campaigner, Emma Fogarty, in the documentary The Slightest Touch.

Oh, it's a pleasure to welcome Colin Farrell!

after winning director and writer behind films like The Iconic Pulp Fiction,

Django Unchained, Inglourious Basterds, and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. His

latest creation is a swashbuckling West End play, The Poppin' J Cavalier. Please

welcome the great Quentin Tarantino!

There he comes!

Hello!

Lovely to see you all.

I know, you picked a good night.

You picked a good night.

Welcome back to Quentin and Colin. First time welcome to Gemma. First time

welcome to Ellen. Hello.

Hello. I'm so pleased you're here, and I don't want this to sound unfriendly in

any way, but why are you here?

I have nothing going on. I miss being on TV, so I thought I would just come on.

Great!

And, of course, the big news is you now live amongst us. You're in the UK.

I live here now. Yeah. I love it. Yeah.

And so, who knows what the... So, do you live in a farm?

Well, we first moved to the Cotswolds, so we have a farm and we live in the

Cotswolds, but then we have a place here as well.

So, when we want to be on the farm and have farm life, we have that, and then

when we want to see people with teeth, we come here.

They have teeth. Yeah, burning crosses outside your house.

We go home tomorrow, it's like, what happened?

But we're happy to have you. And here's the thing, Gemma Chan has a connection,

quite an odd connection, to Colin Farrell. Do you know this? No.

It's quite convoluted. Oh, let's do it then. OK.

It's live television, so... All right.

Buckle up. I have a rescue cat called Mr Kitty, who's five years old, from

Puglia. He has a short, stubby tail.

He had an accident... God is in the details.

We've got a picture of Mr Kitty. Oh!

There he is. There he is.

Oh, God, he looks like he did some MDMA.

That looks like an Edward Keane painting.

Oh, God.

I wouldn't go to sleep if that cat was in the house.

He's a sweetheart.

He's a very sweet boy. Anyway, he has terrible balance and he had an accident

and he hurt his leg and he was maybe going to lose that leg.

but we managed to get hold of Noel Fitzpatrick, the super vet... Lovely

Noel, yes. ..who saved the leg and gave him a hip replacement.

But Noel Fitzpatrick, I've heard, is only a vet because he was an aspiring

actor, but he lost out on a role to you in Ballykazangel.

Ballykazangel, that's right.

Indirectly thanks to you, Mr Kitty has his leg. You're very, very welcome.

You're very, very welcome. APPLAUSE Shaggy dogs. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Shaggy cats. Shaggy cats story.

Shaggy cats story.

And now... Ellen, you do know Colin Farrell. I do know Colin. Yeah, Colin's

been on the show many times. Like, you've been on Ellen's show more than

you've been on this, and that's a lot. Correct. And we've never kissed, you and

I, but we'll get to that later.

How many times?

10, 15?

You've been on, like, I'd say 15 times you were on the show. Yeah. And the

kissing, what's the thing about the kissing? What? I've no idea.

What is the thing about the kiss? What are you talking about? Well, we've got

clips. We've got... This is Ellen meeting Colin on the show, and a similar

thing seems to happen each time.

So this is... I think this is the first time Colin's on the show.

Was it you? Well, this is the very first time. I think it was you. Look at you.

OK. And now... Oh, you pulled me in!

The first guy was drunk. Colin was a lot less shy than sober. Colin came out for

the kiss like this.

Were you drunk that first time? Oh, hell yeah. Really?

I was always drunk.

No, you were- Or hungover, which is a kind of a mild form of being drunk. I

thought you were sober just about every, since I've known you.

Not then. No. Well, I don't know how it started. It was just a mutual

attraction. You grabbed the back of my head, Ellen. I think we saw.

I have breath mints here.

Just in case later on. Wow.

Yeah. When those glasses are all empty.

I guess I'll start with the martini then.

Yeah,

it was just organic.

Were you ever on The Ellen Show?

I was never asked.

I don't know why that is.

No, no, no, no. I don't mean it like that. No, I know.

As we know, there are producers that bring you people, and I don't know why

you were on this. I actually, you know, I mean...

I was always kind of hoping to be on your show. I don't know. Well, I'm so

glad we're meeting now. I don't know why you wouldn't have been.

Let's look into this. Now I'm angry.

It might have been the kissing. We don't know.

One of your routines in the early part of your career was one of my favorite...

Acting little set pieces where you play the the flight attendant.

All right at the end of the flight Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Goodbye, but

go bye-bye. Bye. See you. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye

bits from the 90s. Thank you very much. Very good.

He does impressions now. Very good.

It's true.

It's like I just, I look at, my stuff is so, it's observational because I'm

looking at everyone's side of it. And I just think we're walking out and we just

hear the buh-bye.

But that flight attendant has to say that to all 170 people. So they're

standing there, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh

-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, thank you,

buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye, thank you, buh-bye, buh-bye. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye

-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye

-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye

-bye. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Ellen claims she's here with nothing to talk about.

Quentin Tarantino, au contraire, you have a lot to talk about. So let's get

started. We begin with a play. Yes, a play. It's called The Poppin' J

Cavalier. It's opening at the Phoenix Theatre in London early next year. So I

guess the first question is, like, how did this happen? How did Quentin

Tarantino end up writing a play and putting it on the West End? Well, the

thing about it was...

I've been wanting to write a play for a while, and then I came up with this

idea, and I wrote it.

And I think, because it's kind of like a jumping off on swashbuckler movies and

everything, I think when I first started writing it, at least for like the first

third, I guess what would be the first act, I wrote it as a screenplay. Oh,

okay.

And then it was like...

No, there's something about this character.

There's something huge about this character that if a comic actor were to

play them on stage, in the room, eight shows a week, and you came up there and

you saw it back and forth, you know, with a real live audience every time, it

would be different than a movie. This might be the one to do as a play. And so

then I...

For the rest of it, I just started writing it as a play, and I was very,

very happy with the results.

And who is starring?

I'm very excited to say it's Sacha Baron Cohen.

Can you tell us... It's swashbuckling, it's set in the 19th century.

Yeah, yeah. Can you tell us anything about the story at all?

I want to kind of keep that a little bit under wraps. OK, no, fair enough.

But there is a... Say no more.

It's jumping off from the swashbuckling genre, but there is a real like French

farce quality to it. Oh, okay. And you're directing it as well? Yeah, yeah,

uh-huh. But you've never directed a play before? No, I've never directed a play

before, yeah.

Do you think that'll be hard?

No, I don't think so.

No.

Yeah, no, I don't think so. It's like, no, it's at the... Whoa, whoa, whoa.

That's not arrogant. I actually... But you never directed a film before. What

was your first film?

Reservoir Dogs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll be all right.

That's a good point.

That is a good point.

You'll be all right. I mean, the thing is...

As far as like it being in, you know, these limited, you know, limited spaces,

I can't go everywhere. Well, I kind of figured that out on the page.

And that's kind of how I always do it in a movie. I kind of figure it on the page

and then I do it on, you know, on the screen. So here, as I figured it out on

the page, so it works as a play or it doesn't work, and I think it does. And

so now it's just about, you know, just getting with the actors and just working

it. And then the idea of like eight weeks rehearsal is a luxury in movies.

Yeah. Yeah.

It's a full-on comedy. OK. I mean, like, the issue is, if we do our job

correctly, is... You'll miss some of the dialogue because the laughter will be so

tumultuous. Well, no, I'm even more specific about it. It's like, we're

going to have to add 25 minutes for the laughs, all right? So I've got to take

out 25 minutes of the material. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, do that.

Yeah. Short is great. Oh, wait!

I've seen 15 shows since I've been in the West End. Nothing wrong with short.

No one ever complained about a play being short.

If only there'd been a third act.

But now, Quentin Tarantino, you are still making movies.

Your latest is The Further Misadventures of Cliff Booth. And this is in IMAX from

November the 25th. Now, this, you're getting around the not making your 10th

film. I've come up with a slippery, greasy pig loophole. So, you wrote

this film.

It's a spin-off from Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.

It's the further misadventures of the book.

But the key is, you haven't directed it. Well, I don't know if that's the key,

all right?

I haven't directed it. You have not directed it. David Fincher has.

Yeah. Well, and the thing about it is, he's my favourite director, aside from

myself, all right, working.

And so when Brad suggested, what about...

David doing it, and I go... This is Brad Pitt.

Brad Pitt, Brad Pitt, Cliff Booth. I go, wow, if you think he would be

interested, yeah, all right. And then he read the script and he was interested

and we got together and talked and it was just a marriage made in heaven. So

what's happening to Cliff Booth now? This is set about eight years later?

Yeah, yeah, it takes place in 1977.

And Cliff's not really, he's not really a stuntman that much anymore.

He more has like a series of odd jobs that... he does every week and

everything so that kind of helps make his nut but one of the things that he

does is you know he knows different people in the industry that are our

genuine friends yeah genuine friends and when people in the Hollywood industry

kind of end up crossing over to the wild side and get themselves

into trouble cliff is the kind of guy who can get them out

Okay. Tell you what, to give us a feel for what the movie's like, here's a

little taste of the trailer.

You heard the story about Bruce Lee getting his ass kicked by a stuntman,

yeah? Oh, yeah.

This is the guy!

Evening, fellas.

Couldn't know you from somewhere.

Name's Cliff.

I lost count of how many jokers I killed on TV. But you, you actually killed

people. It's just saying what it's like to kill someone with a knife.

And you've done this thing, you did it with, once upon a time in Hollywood,

you've done a novelization.

Yes, I have. Of the book.

And the movie theory that's in the film and on the cover of the book, this is a

good bit of Hollywood trivia, you own it. Yes, I own the new Beverly.

All right, if you're in Los Angeles, we're a revival house, and we only show

on 35mm film, sometimes on 16, all right, but only on film.

And if you're in Los Angeles, please, check us out.

And there's another, you also have the Vista. I also have the Vista, yeah.

The Vista is so beautiful. Well, that's the jewel box of Los Angeles. Oh, it's

so beautiful. The Vista's a theater in Los Feliz as well that he purchased, I

think, post-COVID. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right on. It's beautiful, man.

You've got a collection.

I'm an exhibitor.

Somebody has said that about me before.

Hands up.

Jesus.

It's great. The sense of community that these theaters also create is really,

really cool, man. Actually, we actually just fairly recently had a cool cop

double feature, all right, at the New Beverly, and we showed SWAT, and it was

a smash. It was a smash, it was a smash. That's old school, man, old school.

Ladies and gentlemen, yeah, I remember.

Very good. Thank you.

So what's it like in real life? It's faster.

We were talking about Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, and we were remarking that

your casting is extraordinary, because we didn't really know who the young

Manson family were, and so many of them are now so famous.

Yeah, that's true. Like, Austin Butler was in there, Sidney Sweeney, Oscar

winner Micah Madison, Margot Qualley.

Like, is it because they were in a Quentin Tarantino film that they've gone

on to success, or...? Not at...

all uh you know i appreciate i appreciate having my name attached with

with them they all had it's not like i found them in a community theater all

right they they they had all had done things before in the past i mean austin

butler was actually acting in uh iceman cometh on broadway with uh denzel

washington uh when i cast him but the thing is though is look Me and my

casting director, Victoria Thomas, look, we just did a really, really good job.

We looked at everybody in town that could play those roles, and well, guess

what? We picked the right people. Good ones.

We picked the right people, but...

They were all kind of coming from somewhere, and I'm getting a little bit

more credit than I deserve because they all were going where they were going on

their own. It did not hurt, all right?

But in the case of Sidney Sweeney, she had already done Euphoria, the first

season, so she's actually doing us a favor, all right, being in the show.

Because, Gemma, you had a kind of experience like this where Crazy Rich

Asians, like a lot of you going into that movie, weren't that well-known, and

then... You know were yeah. Yeah, it was an amazing thing. It was um Kind of like

a asians assemble for this movie. Um But yeah incredible cast we've got brilliant

people there who've gone on to do Amazing things. So yeah and like for

your family, it must have been kind of like our daughters in a big movie Like a

proper big movie. Yeah, my my parents are very um, you know, they're both none

of them in the arts they're very practical people and um when I

originally did a law degree and uh switched to then do acting which was a

little bit also thrilled them. Yeah That was a quiet christmas But yeah when they

came to see the movie my mom told me that she heard a song that her mom used

to sing Back in China when she was young that she'd never heard You know not

heard for a long time and it really moved her to tears. So she's yeah, that

was really powerful Wow, she's here somewhere

And, you know, talk about directors giving people parts. Like, directors can

make stars, but also they can kind of change the trajectory of established

stars. I'm thinking, like, Martin McDonagh. Yeah.

When he came to you with In Bruges, is the story that you thought you weren't

right for In Bruges?

No, I thought I was right for it, but I thought it was terrible casting.

OK.

Correct.

I had just got out of rehab, and so I had burnt a good few bridges, and...

The phone wasn't ringing the way it did in the first few years of my career, and

it was ringing also built on a promise that wasn't anything to do with reality,

and I gained certainly a lot of finances from that, but it was all crazy for the

first three years.

But I had a little interesting journey and took a side trip to rehab, and then

I came out of rehab, Martin wanted to meet me, and I knew Martin from back in

the day from hanging out with him in London when he was doing his theatre

here. Yeah.

And we'd had some good nights on the tiles.

All in the distant past now.

Only coffee and tea.

But we met and he said, you read the script? And I had read it. He had sent

it. I said, yeah. And he said, what do you think? I said, I just think it's one

of the most brilliant things I've ever read. It's so beautiful. It's so moving.

It's such a love story between these two characters. And it's just an anarchy as

well in moments. And it's hilarious.

And he said, great, so you'll do it? And I said, no, I think you can do better.

And he went, what?

what are you talking about? And I said, no, no, no. I said, to be honest with

you, I was very, I wasn't like, whoa.

I just said, I come with a lot of baggage.

I said, and I might not be known for the right stuff right now. So I think you

should get somebody that the audience doesn't come in with any kind of

prejudice at the beginning. The writing is that good. And he went, okay, great.

That's fantastic. You're not the casting director.

Shut the fuck up.

Do the film and I went, OK, I'm in. Oh, you did?

Yeah. No, no, no, it was a great film. Yeah, it was a lovely film to do.

Ellen, can we talk about Dory in Finding Nemo? We can. Yeah, because everyone

loves that film.

Is it...? There you go.

So, a bit like Colin was talking about, so the director, Andrew Stanton?

Yes. So, he...

Rang you out of the blue to be in this movie, or...? Yeah, it was right after I

had come out and the show had been cancelled because... Your sitcom, yeah.

My sitcom had been cancelled because gay people don't work in Hollywood, so I

was... I was sitting at home and wasn't getting offers and the phone rings and

it's this guy, Andrew Stanton, who's this Pixar nerd who didn't know anything

about me not being able to work.

And.

Said I wrote this thing with you in mind because he would hear me in the

background on the sitcom Rambling and even my stand-up like I do these things

where I just ramble and forget what I'm saying and go back and forth And he said

I'm writing this this character that has short-term memory loss and I don't want

it Offensive I'm like trying to do this in a delicate way and I think you you

can do it and I believe you can forget

I've got to ask you about the tenth film, the final film.

Have you written it? Do you know what it is?

Uh... Maybe.

OK.

Well, no, no, no, I'm trying to be provocative.

I've written a script that I could do, that I really, really like.

But I have to kind of do the play and see kind of who I am, all right?

I'll finish the play and then I'll go back and be with my family for a while

and then live and then let's see what that guy wants to do.

OK, I should remind everybody, The Papa J Cavalier, it starts previews on the

23rd of February and it opens on the 18th of March. Tickets are on sale now.

Quentin Tarantino, everybody!

Move! Moving on to Colin Farrell. He brings us an extraordinary story. It's a

documentary called The Slightest Touch. It's available to stream on HBO Max from

November the 26th. And this is the story of you and your friend Emma Fogarty.

You would need a heart of stone not to cry at this film. Tell us about your

friend Emma Fogarty and the point in which we meet her and you. What do you

want to know about her? She's amazing.

I met her. Emma was born... Emma Fogarty was born with a condition called

epidermolysis bullosa. known as EB for obvious reasons and it is basically an

issue with the collagen the proteins between the skin so basically if Emma as

a child and anyone who has EB as a child there are three different types she is

the most severe she's one of three people in Ireland has the most severe

version if she bangs her arm off a table she'll blister the arm will become an

open wound she's not known a day since she was born that hasn't been

lived with pain as her constant companion every second of every day

since she was born, and yet she has lived the most beautiful, most

meaningful, most community-driven, cheeky, she's funny as fuck, she is so

bold, she's such an incredible advocate for herself.

Her family have obviously advocated on her behalf. I met her 15 years ago. I

sat beside her at a dinner. She took the piss out of me. I took the piss out of

her. I was worried, was that inappropriate?

Certainly not inappropriate to take the piss out of a celebrity.

but I was worried it was inappropriate to take the visit, but she laughed, I

laughed, it kept going, and that was 15 years ago, and then we started emailing

each other, and then I come home to Dublin and I see her, and long story

short, I said to her in passing about...

Four years ago, I said, jeez, we should do a marathon together someday. And I

just didn't even think about it. And then two years later, I got a text from

her, do you remember when we said it?

And I thought, oh, man.

And I said, I'm in, I'm in, whatever.

I said, look, if we're going to do a marathon, you and me, we should do a

documentary about it, just for the fun. I was just thinking of the fun and raise

some awareness around epidermolysis bullosa to try and find a cure.

and all the things that are needed for those who suffer with it.

And she went, what do you mean documentary? I said, I don't know. We'll

try and find someone. And we found someone. We found Rachel Flight, who's

an extraordinary director. And she did a, I had seen her documentary work

before and she came on board. There was no structure.

There was no, it was all vague.

It was just Rachel.

This is Emma. I'm Colin. We're going to do a marathon. And what do you want to

do? And then we opened up our lives to her and it became this documentary. And

it begins with sort of Emma beating all the odds.

Emma. is 40. Yeah.

Her parents were told to leave her in the hospital and to not bother taking

her home, that she wasn't going to last a week.

And so Emma's fingers now, by the way, she has her fingers and she can move

them under her hands, but they're all melted together because of the

condition. Mad. You'll see in her pictures there, you can see that her

hands are, you know, so I'll just do this for Emma to the doctors. She very

much was like... You know what I mean?

40,

14.

Yeah.

She's 42 now. She was turning 40 for the marathon, and the whole idea was I'd

push her the last 4K each kilometre, representing a decade that she had

survived EB.

We've got a little clip. This is you with Emma, and you're testing out the

new wheelchair. The new wheels, yeah, the new wheels. Here we go.

Here we go.

Keep me eye on the road ahead of you. Exactly.

You owe me 20 euro for every pothole we go by that I don't hit.

How do you feel? I feel great. Is it easy push?

Yeah, it's great.

Is it heavy?

No.

I just made a face behind your back. Yeah, I know what you're saying.

I saw what you were saying.

It's too easy, nut. Oh, it's a lot.

I love this.

The friendship is genuine. I love her so much. She's the most inspiring human

being I've ever met. And I've been fortunate enough to meet a few families

with children who have EB and the courage that they demonstrate every day

is just next level. It's unimaginable. We've got a little bit here. This is

you. You must have been exhausted. This is right at the end. If you roll the

clip there, we can just see. This is, so you'd run 38 kilometres at this point.

Yeah. And this is you meeting her.

Yeah. And we'd been talking about it, me and her, for two years. And it was a big

thing. And it was touch and go whether we could do it or not, because the

Dublin Marathon organizers were really worried. There was a point where they

said to her, look, we can't let you run 4K. We've never had anyone with

epidermolysis biloxi be pushed to the marathon. If something happens, I was

terrified I was going to spill her. Like, you know, spill Emma. And that's

curtains, as I said in the film. It's curtains. It's all, you know.

And so I literally, like, Emma is a foot. self-realized woman, and she's

powerful as anything I've ever met, powerful more than most, and I still

said to her, I just have to have one of your parents at least tell me it's okay.

Just one of your parents. And her mother came on, Pat, and she went, yeah, of

course it's okay. I mean, she can't just do nothing, you know? She wants to do

it. Look at what she's done with her life. Of course it's okay, Colin.

Bye!

We also should say, yeah, you're...

You're raising awareness, but you also, which they raised over a million euros.

A million euros, yeah, man.

I know,

the people of Ireland really got out behind it.

We did a media blitz the two weeks before the marathon. Sorry, love. I

would love if we could raise awareness for something for you to push me in a

marathon. I will, definitely, but you have to say bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye to

everyone.

26.2 fucking miles.

26.2 miles.

I'd pay money for that.

I'd donate money for that, yeah.

And the thing that struck me, it's obviously the story of Emma Fogarty, but

I was really surprised that it's so much about you as well.

There's a lot of your personal life and your family and stuff.

I wasn't a big fan of that part.

Is that why you didn't sign up for that? I did sign up. I can't blame anyone.

Damn thing was my idea, you know?

So I don't know where to throw the stone.

Mirror.

But I knew that I was going to have to open up a bit of my life to get her

story out there.

And then our director's just so damn loving and empathetic, Rachel, and so...

So decent fundamentally there was never any kind of journalistic angle She was

trying to take and she was over in my house and and we'd have conversations

and then things turned to my dad and my kids And yes, I end up blubbering. Yeah

for the majority.

I mean, but it's such an inspiring film It really is such a hopeful. I'm

delighted to think that you should be so proud of talking Talking of

marathons, is it your mom who's marathon crazy?

My mum has run over a hundred. No

And

she only started running when my sister and I

left home no way she joined a local running club and yeah She keeps pitching

me each year saying we should do a mother-daughter marathon and I'm like,

maybe next year Telly see what she says now

Graham yeah, I hate to do this. I have to take a piece so bad

I

think

it is the difference between performers and directors because he's not used to

having to hold his pee

We're all used to hoping to hold our pee. Exactly. Yeah. He should have

thought of that before he came out here. Yeah.

I've gone to the toilet twice sitting here. Yeah.

I would love to know how many countries are... Did you run marathons all over

the world?

Yes, I did.

Whereabouts, though? Give me a couple of places. All over the States, all over

Europe, Hong Kong, Marrakesh. You did Marrakesh? Yeah.

Oh, that's... And I did Dublin.

Did you? Yeah. Was it raining or no? Was it all right?

It was OK, actually.

It's flat enough, isn't it? It's flat enough. And what's your best time?

3.43.

Oh, that's amazing.

Really good.

You are going to end up running more marathons. Just stop talking to people

about marathons. I know.

Where do you want to go next?

I'm free in February.

I think Quentin's doing number two, by the way.

I got so... I got so... I'll tell him I said that when he comes out,

because I don't want to be the guy... It's kindness work. Yeah, yeah.

Just sign it.

Oh, here he is now!

Yay!

Hey, Sarah. I said I think I can see the number two.

No, no, no, no, no.

It literally was a situation where I had to go so bad that I was actually...

Totally like... Let go?

I couldn't let go.

Very bad etiquette. You're good, you're good.

But don't have any more to drink.

LAUGHTER We're done, we're done.

Now, Gemma Chan.

Gemma Chan's latest film is such a powerful, beautiful film. It is called

Josephine. It's in cinemas from November the 20th. I know this is a film you care

deeply about, so tell us who you play and who Josephine is.

Yeah. So, Josephine is a psychological thriller.

It is loosely inspired by an experience that our director, Beth Jairuzo, had in

her childhood, and it's about how an eight-year-old girl witnesses a brutal

crime and her mind spirals, and it's about her journey of resilience to

overcoming her fear.

And Channing Tatum and I play her parents, who both love her very much,

but they don't agree on the best way to help her.

Well, actually, that's a very good kind of intro into the clip we have. This is

you and Channing Tatum.

with the daughter Josephine disagreeing.

JoJo, do you have any questions about today?

When can I have a gun?

I do not want those in the house. I don't care even if they are a toy. I

think it's absolutely absurd that they even make them for children.

Jo.

It's the job of parents to keep kids safe.

Why weren't her parents in the park?

Jo, that's never gonna happen to you. Ever.

You can't say that to her.

I absolutely can't say that to her.

The story... I mean, the story is really compelling, but we've got to talk about

that little girl played by Mason Reeves. She is extraordinary.

Oh, my goodness, she just blew us away. She's...

When we filmed, she turned eight and Beth actually found her in a farmer's

market in San Francisco.

So she was looking for someone who looked like the love child of myself and

Channing. So tell me this. So they cast you and Channing Tatum first and then

had to find a kid that looked like you might have had.

Yes. So I was actually... I joined the project and I got sent the script in

2019. So it was a winding road. We almost made it and then Covid happened

and the strikes and it fell apart a few times and Beth went and made another

film. which is brilliant. It's called Soft and Quiet. It's a one-take film. If

you haven't seen it, you absolutely should.

And then Channing joined, and then we were six weeks out from shooting and we

still didn't have the little girl, because the girl who we had originally

cast had aged out of the role.

Yeah. So, Beth went to this farmer's market that was... It was, like, at the

intersection between a very Caucasian area and an East Asian area, and she

said, I'm just going to find her here.

LAUGHTER

That sounds like good casting, actually.

And then this little girl just ran past and, you know, Josephine, the girl in

the film, she's a tomboy, she's very physically active and she just had that

energy and so she just chased after her and went up to her and said, you know,

who are your parents?

And Mason was like... Who the hell are you? Strange lady.

She went and spoke to the mum and said, I'm looking for someone to play the

daughter of Channing Tatum and Gemma Chan.

And they just thought she was making it up, like... Yeah.

..as you would.

And, yeah, and then they sent a tape in for her and she... Yeah, she was just

brilliant. She's incredible.

It's one of the best...

So she had never acted before?

She's never acted before. It's her first film.

Did she find it hard? Were there scenes that she was really struggling with?

Never is the truth.

I mean, I should say that our film deals with some very challenging subject

matter, but it was very important that...

she was protected and felt safe, so she never read the script in full. Her

parents were around all the time? We always had her mother or her father, or

both, on set every day.

We wanted to make sure she didn't read the script in full, she's never seen the

film in full, and we used a bit of VFX to put her in scenes that we didn't want

her to see. Yeah, it's really so important. And you must be so gratified

that, you know, given, as you say, it was not easy to get this film made, that

it's had such a great response.

It premiered at Sundance and it did so well. It's brilliant.

It's magnificent, it's devastating, but it's brilliant, it really is. Oh, thank

you. You're all extraordinary. Yeah, it was amazing to watch it with an audience

there for the first time, and the response was, yeah, incredible.

And we see you flex your ballet muscles in this film.

I do.

So, I play a character that is inspired by Beth's mum, who was a ballet dancer,

and so Beth spoke to me and said, you know, I really think you need to dance

in this film, we're going to have this thing, and I was like, hold on.

we have Magic Mike in the movie and you want me to dance? Like, are you serious?

But she was like... She was very important. It comes at an emotional

point, like, midpoint of the film. So, yeah, I worked with an amazing

choreographer called Katarina Beckman and they whipped me into shape. Had you

done ballet before?

I did ballet until I was 11 years old and then had so you had some it was very

rusty. Yeah Yeah, they make me look much better than I was channing there on the

day He was. And he was like, thank God, I can just sit back and I don't have to

do this.

He was so happy about it. But you danced with him, Ellen, didn't you? You danced

with Channing Tatum. I have danced with Channing Tatum, actually on one of his

Magic Mike performances.

I was on stage with him. Really?

Yeah. I didn't know that.

Yeah, we took the show to Vegas and we did a thing and, yeah.

Were you taking his clothes off or something?

Kind of. OK.

You've danced with him. I've seen a clip of you... He danced with me.

I've worked with Channing, I've never danced with him.

You and me. I missed out. It's a missed opportunity.

And, Helen, because you spent so much of your life on television, do you miss it?

Um... Yeah, I miss a lot about it. I miss the, you know, I miss laughing

every single day with the writers, and I miss the guests that I... I miss kissing

Colin.

I miss a lot of it. And I think about doing something here.

It does seem... It does seem easy to get on television here, because...

Charming. I mean, I just called you up and I said, I have nothing to promote.

Can I just sit on the couch? And you're like, yeah. Yeah, sure.

It's true.

I mean, you know, I mean, there are shows here that I'm just shocked that

someone went and sold it.

And, you know, like, there's a sewing show. So you're watching someone sew.

There's a pottery show where there's... There's a thing... There's a show of

watching people watch television.

Like... And I'm like, I could just come up with, like... I mean, I mow every

day. I like to mow. And I thought people could mow and see how long you

disassociate from your family. Because that's what you're doing. You're out

there just by yourself and alone.

As long as you can be out there.

And... I can call it lawn and order.

Ooh! Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. There will be an email in your inbox before you leave the set.

Tomorrow, yeah.

Well, it's so lovely to have you here, and good luck with whatever you do next.

Ellen DeGeneres, everybody!

Right.

It's time for music! This band won the prestigious Mercury Prize for their

debut album 33 years ago, and this year they are up for another one. Here

performing their single Dancing With The Europeans, please welcome Swade!

Oh, and the road will run like a river. Where the headlights shine

like a river. We run like a river. I run back to you. I run like a river.

Through the parks and through the pavilions. Through the countryside like

a human tide. Like a river tonight. We'll run. We'll run like a river.

There's something inside that craves the artificial light

There's something inside that craves the blue and

yellow lights

to be dancing with the europeans

on the road will run like a river and we want

to be strong and we want to belong to belong to the road and the rails to

belong to the river where the soldiers and the civilians

all the flesh might die but our love won't survive when you're by my side

well death shall have no dominion there's something

inside that craves the simulated life

there's something inside that likes white artificial

lights

Ghosts are my ghosts.

Thank you.

Swade, everybody!

Great job.

I think, Brett, you're coming over to see us?

Here comes Brett.

Hello, sir.

Lovely to see you.

Very kind of you.

Have a seat, have a seat. One of those drinks is yours.

Is it like Lucky Dip?

Yeah, really.

Thank you so much for being here and doing that performance. It's been a

while. I think it's 23 years since you were last on the show. Yes, it was. And

now, I hesitate to bring this up, because on the show, we had a lovely

time with you, but the band had a less lovely time. Yeah.

I'm not blaming you, specifically, but last time we were on here, we split up.

It's actually true.

No, it is really. Yeah, it's actually true. We had a... Did you used to film

it here? I can't remember. No, we were in London Studios.

We got a picture of it. You could sort of tell something was off.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You don't look like a happy man. There's a tension.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, was there a fight, or you just decided, we've reached a low ebb, we're

on The Graham Norton Show?

You know, more bands should split up, to be honest.

It's one of those... And how long did you stay... A mercy killing.

How long did you stay split up for?

Seven or eight years, I think. And then we reformed for Teenage Cancer Trust.

They said, come and do a show.

And then we were just going to do, like, a one-off show for Teenage Cancer.

And it sort of... I don't know.

Couldn't leave it alone, really.

That's kind of adorable that you got back together and kind of thought, well,

actually, we miss each other.

Yeah. No, it was lovely. And then we started making new records and, you

know... It's... Yeah, that's... And here we are.

And that's everything that's happened in my life up until this point.

Here we are, 10th studio album, Antidepressants. Your debut album was

nominated for the Mercury Prize and now you are nominated again.

Debut album won the Mercury Prize. Oh, it won it! It won it! God damn it, it

won it!

33 years later, do you care more or less?

I think you care more because it is very, very, very rare for bands 33 years

after winning the Mercury Music Prize to still be relevant.

And I think one of the reasons that we're still here now is because we

approach the new music we're making now...

as passionately as we ever have. And in a way, I think we've reinvented our

sound and all these kind of things. So I'm very, very proud of that. It's kind

of like a symbol of recognition in a way. And you've got some die-hard fans

in the audience tonight.

There they are.

And I'm guessing they might be showing up for your tour. You're heading out on

tour with the Manic Street Peaches.

That's right, yeah.

Very good.

Yes, yeah.

Is that...?

That's me, yeah. No, but that's now.

That's this October. That's me with the microphone there.

Like, I'm eating a big piece of spaghetti.

Like Lady and the Tramp. It's adorable.

So, when is the Mercury Prize announced?

Oh, it's next week, isn't it? Next Thursday, I think. Oh, is it?

Yeah, yeah. Oh, listen, good luck. It's up in Newcastle. Are you going to come?

Yes. Oh, no, I'm working. Oh, I know.

Good luck with the Mercury Prize. Thank you very much. I hope you pull it off,

that would be amazing. We won't. Good luck with the tour.

Thank you for that performance.

Thank you so much.

Swade, everybody!

OK, that is nearly it before we go. Just time for a trick visit to the big red

chair. Who do we have?

Hello. Hello.

Hi, what's your name? I'm Renee.

Renee, lovely. Where are you from, Renee?

I'm from New Zealand.

Fabulous, home of the anecdote.

Do you live here now, Renee?

Yes, I'm here now.

Oh, love it. She's here now.

Yeah.

What do you do here, Renee?

Yeah, so I work as a customer experience lead at a health tech start-up.

Sweet Jesus, pop that in a business card.

OK, Renee, off you go with your story.

Yeah, so I've been in London just under a year, but a couple of months into

moving here, I decided to get on the dating apps, downloaded the top three

that everyone uses, cycled through everyone... Wow. ..decided...

Busy, busy, busy.

Yeah, so then I decided to narrow my search into downloading a...

app that's for South Asians that are based all around the world and I came

across my cousin on there.

So I noped out of that because absolutely not, do not need that and

then went back to one of the other apps and turns out one of the other apps had

marked him as my most compatible and yeah I messaged him and he said yeah

yeah I saw you and it said that you're the most compatible for me as well.

And now they're married. No we're not.

That's always a bit creepy.

Please say thank you to all of my guests. Swain, everybody.

Ellen DeGeneres.

Gemma Chan.

Colin Farrell.

And Quentin Tarantino.

Join me next week with music from Georgia Smith, Aussie conservationist

Robert Irwin, Ted Lasso star Hannah Waddingham, and double Oscar winner Cate

Blanchett. I'll see you then. Good night, everybody. Bye-bye.

With current classic and future hits feel the beat of radio one dance listen

on BBC sounds for baseline bliss and Uncovering some of the wildest health

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