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Oh shit.

What are you doing hiding back here?

I'm not hiding, I'm just...

just resting.

Rest is something you do when you're tired from working.

What you're doing out here is called rotting.

Mum, I just need some space,

- some time. - Time for what?

To continue to decompose.

- Is that my ice cream? - Maybe.

Well when you've finished contaminating it with chips,

you can pop to the dairy and replace that for me.

Okay, good chat. Thank you, Mum.

Well, if you're feeling tired during the daytime,

why don't you just give up the screens in bed?

Worked for me.

Yeah, good idea. I'll do that.

♪ Desperate ♪

♪ For you ♪

♪ Turn to ♪

♪ Your love ♪

Mary?

- Oh! - What the fuck, Mum?

Sorry, I didn't want to knock, I thought you'd be sleeping.

Oh my God, that does not make it okay.

What, to check on my own daughter? I think it does.

I've been checking on you your whole life.

Okay, well you can stop now, thank you.

Oh, look at all this dirty clothes.

Can you not?

Oh...

oh...

what a pigsty.

Sweetheart?

I'm having a hard time sleeping and I'm just worried

that the neighbours will be too so...

maybe you can think about that and...

maybe stop doing whatever it is that you're doing.

Okay?

Okay.

Good morning, Boo.

Now, I noticed that you didn't take out the rubbish last night.

And, and it is the chore you chose.

So...

I just, I just hope you're not expecting me to do it.

Kids are dicks.

Sorry?

They're dicks.

Oh, are they?

I'm sorry, I was talking about my kid.

Well, she's not a kid anymore, she's almost 30.

Have you just moved in?

Oh a couple of months ago.

Oh, sorry, we haven't met already. I'm Cynthia.

Oh, it's okay, we're just very private people.

Oh, you and your partner?

No, um...

- ...me and my son. - Oh, I knew it.

It's funny, I haven't seen him around.

How old is he?

Oh, he's an adult

but he doesn't come out of his room much

Oh, you know what?

Neither does my daughter.

I'm glad she's not the only one, though.

I was starting to believe it was something to do with me.

Uh, would you like a cup of tea?

No.

- Is that your daughter? - Yes. She hates that photo.

Look, I hope it's okay for me to ask you this.

I don't know if you've been on any of the dating apps.

Oh, I'm really not interested in anything like that.

Oh, you're not missing much.

You know, I just thought, you know,

I'd put something out there just because the kids

are both the same age and they're both single.

Oh, no, I really don't think that's a good idea.

Wow.

Okay.

You know, she's lost weight since that photo was taken.

- Oh, no, no, no. - You know, plus...

a new relationship might inspire them

to get their lives together a bit, you know?

Well, look, the thing is, my son...

my son has a deformity.

You can't tell just by looking at him but,

it affects his confidence socially, so...

Oh, getting out there might be--

No, I'm... I'm really not comfortable

- with that idea, Cynthia. - Oh.

Well, I see, no... no stress.

Thank you.

What kind of deformity does he have, if I may ask?

It's just the kind we don't talk about.

Baby, I know you're having a hard time and...

you know I love having you here,

but I actually just need to use the bathroom, sorry.

I don't actually know

why I'm apologising to you,

for needing to pee in my own house.

I want to move out.

Oh baby girl that would be great for you...

or even just go out once in a while.

Did you get that link I sent you about overcoming depression?

I don't think I'm depressed.

Well, you don't seem very happy.

Yeah, I'm happy when I'm alone.

Oh, if you're going to move out,

you can start doing your own laundry.

Yeah, maybe I'll get to see a little bit less of this.

You know, you did most of this to my body.

And it was the most empowering and rewarding thing

that ever happened to me.

Well, you're welcome.

Speaking-of, I met our new neighbour today.

She's got a son your age.

- Subtle, Mum. - Apparently he's got

a deformed penis or something, but...

I thought you'd be into it based on your search history.

Ugh...

I love having no boundaries with you.

Oh, me too.

Where are you going?

I'm going to go do my own laundry.

It's the middle of the night!

Oh, come on!

Sorry.

Who the fuck are you?

Sorry, just, um, my, my load is in there.

If I could just, um...

Oh.

No, well, I'm sorry.

- Thank you. - Yep.

Sorry, I, I didn't know that you, um...

Humping the dryer?

- Yep. - Hmm.

Hey do you live with your mum?

Um, yes.

You have some kind of weird dick?

No.

No, no, no. Um, no, that's not true. I don't know.

Oh, well, my mum said your mum said

you've got, like, a deformed penis.

My... my mum wouldn't say that, so...

Oversharing mum, eh?

- I mean, not normally. - Sucks, eh?

- Fricken' eh! - Right?

- I mean, sometimes. - Hmm.

It's just, like...

- No, look, I get it. - Yeah, thanks.

- So, can I see it? - What?

No, sorry, no.

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

Good boundaries.

Um... um, maybe see you around?

No, I'm going to move out, so probably not.

Oh, cool, cool.

Goodbye.

Okay, bye.

Sorry, excuse me. Uh, sorry.

Um, do you-- Do you think maybe that you can not tell anyone

what your mum said about what my mum said about,

well, my penis? If that's okay.

- Sure. - It was very r-ice to meet...

Sorry, really nice to meet you.

Not rice. Um.

- Um... - Yeah, uh-huh.

Sorry if I made it awkward before.

No, it's all good.

I'm sorry for asking about your weird dick.

It's not weird. It's some kind of special.

- Here we go. - No, no, really. Um...

It has, like, tentacles.

- Fuck off. - Like, uh, little ones.

How little?

Like, I... I can

show you if you want.

I don't know.

You're the one with the boundaries.

Oh, I... Pfft.

I mean, I don't get the... I don't mind.

I fucking knew it.

Well, come on, then.

Let me see it.

Okay, but, like, you can't tell my mum or your mum because,

um, we'll have to move again.

Okay. Okay, thank you for telling me that.

- Can you shut the door? - Yeah, yeah. Yes.

Hey, and maybe you already know this but...

just because I'm, like, agreeing to look at your...

whatever, I don't want to be your girlfriend, okay?

- No, I... I know, I know. - And I'm not going to touch it.

Okay.

Cool.

Whoa!

Why does it look like that?

I, I guess, um...

my mum actually got abducted by aliens

and that's how she got pregnant with me or whatever.

I... I don't know.

- You don't know? - Um...

No, she doesn't really...

like, talk about it.

- Yeah? - I think

she's, like, pretty embarrassed

because, like, I'm a child of sin or whatever.

Um, but, actually, one time when I was really sad,

she said that maybe I'm, like, the next step

of human evolution or something.

Um, you know, which, uh, is kind of dumb.

Kind of looks like a pussy.

No, it's just cold in here.

So do you...

you know.

I, I, I kind of like, do like a...

And the tentacles?

They sort of do whatever, they're...

they're kind of involuntary.

Are they slimy?

Only if I get too sweaty.

Right.

Hey, do you mind if I...

like, jill off a little bit?

Please, go hard.

- Okay. - Um...

Yeah.

Can you, like, shut your eyes, please?

Yeah. Sorry. Um, uh, wait. You mean like this?

Can you please move it around a little bit?

Wait, so have you started?

Shut your eyes.

Sorry, okay. Sorry.

Um, sorry, actually, do you mind if I jill off as well, please?

Yes.

Can you just please stop talking?

- Okay. - Okay. Thank you, sorry.

Oh, you like that baby girl?

- Oh, shut the fuck up! - Sorry, sorry.

Fuck your shutting eyes!

Sorry. Yes. Sorry.

What the fuck was that?

- Uh, what? - You splooged on me.

No, I... no, I didn't.

Yes, you did.

Right on my-- Oh my God.

Shit, what you? You... you weren't wearing undies?

Yeah well, you didn't say, It shoots acid.

You could have pointed it at the fucking wall.

Please, please, please do not tell my mum.

I'm gonna tell whoever I want.

You can't just go around jizzing on people.

That shit makes babies.

But you, you told me to touch it.

Well, you could've pointed it at your fucking face next time.

Uh, next time?

Stop looking at my vagina.

- Yeah, sorry. - Shit.

Mary?

Why have you got no pants on?

They got jizz on them.

Girl jizz?

No, Mum, alien jizz.

Why do you have to be so sarcastic with me?

I'm not being sarcastic. It burned a hole in my pants.

Now you're looking for some of my pants.

No, Mum, I need to borrow your car, please.

What?

No.

- When? - Now.

What time is it?

It doesn't matter, but it has to be now.

- Oh. - Where are your keys?

It matters to me? Because it's my car.

Come and get into bed with Mum and tell me what's up.

Oh! No, Mum.

♪ My eyes are too small And my mouth's too big ♪

♪ And my ears Are a different size ♪

You know, just so you know...

it's pretty much impossible to get pregnant

without having proper P and V sex.

Okay, cool. Let's just still take

some precautions, all right?

'Cause of course you could be ovulating,

which would increase your chances eh?

You know, for some people...

myself included, having a baby is a real wake-up call.

Well, it gives you purpose,

a chance to get your life together.

Mum...

it wasn't a normal human penis.

Oh, the penis has got nothing to do with it.

It's all about you.

And your own journey as a woman.

Well, it had tentacles.

- What? - Yeah.

It was that boy. You met his mum.

The deformed one?

Can you not say that?

Differently-formed. It's more appropriate.

I can see why you want to take precautions, but...

look, if not now when?

You won't be young forever, you know.

And having a baby is so much easier when you're younger.

But maybe you're a natural.

Yeah, maybe I don't need to become a mother

to give my life meaning.

♪ I love my feet ♪

I'll sit here, shall I?

Oh, shit.

What?

- You don't have any money. - No, do you?

I'm not going in there in my pyjamas.

That's totally fine, you don't have to come in.

Can I just borrow your card please?

Uh, so, um...

you've been engaging in, uh, unprotected intercourse?

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Uh, how... how... how many hours since the...

unprotected intercourse?

- One. - And in the last two weeks...

have you engaged in any other unprotected intercourse?

No.

Right. Well, uh, when was your last period?

Fuck, I don't know, I don't know.

But I, I just want to be on the safe side.

- He had a deformed penis, so... - Can you stop?

I'm just saying.

- It's why she's being like this. - Shut up.

It's not that she doesn't want kids.

Well, you'll be pleased to know

that the Postinor does not damage the, uh, unborn baby.

If you still do become pregnant.

- Oh, that's good, isn't it? - That's all right.

Right.

Now then, uh, if you, uh,

vomit in the next three hours...

you should come back and get another one.

- That'll be $40, thank you. - Okay. Thank you.

Oh, by... by the way, how much do you weigh?

Huh?

- A lot. - Why do you-- Shut up.

The pill only works up to a certain body weight,

which I believe is, uh, 70 kgs.

- Are you fucking serious? - Mary.

- Give me another one. - Please. Please.

That'll be $80, thank you very much.

Thank you.

Ah!

I'm so glad we did that.

Yeah?

- Thanks, Mum. - You're welcome, baby.

You can still pay me back, though. It wasn't cheap.

No!

Mary! Mary! Wake up! Wake up! Mary! Wake up!

Oh. Oh.

I'm fine.

Oh, you didn't look fine.

You looked like you were having a full-on nervous

- breakdown. - I'm fine.

I just want you to be non-aggressive. All right

Don't be so aggressive,

- with that attitude. - Why are you saying that?

I've never been aggressive?

- Already made friends? - We're not friends,

we don't need to go in we can just be at the door.

I've already made friends with the woman.

She's not you're friend.

Play nice, for God's sakes.

Think you can do this?

Yes, of course, I can do it.

It's not my fault.

All right, stabilise your mood.

Oh. Okay.

Don't have a cup of tea, okay?

I will if I want to.

Because you're really aggressive,

- I can see in your eyes. - That's so rude.

Oh, hey Ann. Is this a good time for a little convo?

Not really, no.

Oh, look, it's a bit sensitive. Can... can we sit down?

Is there a problem?

Oh, I think you need to hear this.

Can I offer you a hot drink? Tea or a coffee?

- No. - Oh, I'd actually

love a coffee, thanks.

- Oh, instant, okay? - Oh, yes, that's fine.

- Milk and sugar? - Just milk, thanks.

And you don't want a hot drink? A hot chocolate?

No.

- A Milo? - Mm-hmm.

Wow.

Oh, this place is really clean.

We've got company.

If you've come to see my son, I should let you know

that he doesn't come out of his room much, so...

Just get the hot drinks.

I've actually already met him.

- What? - Mm-hmm.

When?

I met him last night.

Well, that's why we're here, actually.

I wanted you to know that they've had relations.

No, don't say it like that.

Well, they fluid Bonded.

- What? - He jizzed on my pants.

Hmm.

Right.

He's probably just still asleep. I'll just, um...

I reckon you should let me handle the talking.

- Maybe we should just go, Mum. - Well, I'm okay.

But you can leave at any time, baby girl.

Go and have an Epsom salts bath and some raspberry leaf tea.

And stop scratching. You look like a druggo.

There he is.

Um...

Hello Mary. Um, it's good to, um, see you again.

Hey.

Uh, is this your mum?

Oh, yeah. Cynthia, hi.

It's good to meet you.

Um, uh, can I interest anyone, um...

in, in a hot drink or

Oh Jesus, Mary!

- Mum! - Oh, yeah,

I'm getting something.

- Why does it look like that? - It looks, uh, normal.

Do you...

Do you think it was the pills?

No.

She had to have two morning-after pills

- because of her weight. - It's not the pills.

It's his fucking alien penis juice.

- Oh my God. - No, no, no.

No. It was... it was an accident. - What?

You tripped over and it fell out of your pants.

No, but she... she told me to take it out.

- Oh, did she? - Oh, so fucking what?

Well, it means

- you kind of asked for it. - No, I was asking to see it,

not be impregnated by it.

- One thing leads to another - One thing does lead to another.

- Why do you keep scratching? - Because I feel like it!

- What's that on your neck? - Stop.

- Do you have a rash? - No.

- You do? Look. - Where?

Where?

- Oh. - What?

- Oh. - Oh.

Boo.

Fuck!

- Hello. - Hi.

Uh, my daughter has a rash.

Um, no, I think I might be alien-pregnant.

Oh, what kind of rash?

Oh, nasty, itchy, scabby one.

- Can you... - And then she vomited one time.

Have you done a pregnancy test?

No, but she did take two morning-after pills.

When was your last menorrhoea?

I don't know.

- Your period? - Your period?

Yes. I know what it is.

- I don't know. - A long time?

A couple of weeks.

And the sex was just last night.

We didn't have sex.

Well, he... he had a differently-formed phallus.

Excuse me, can you please shut the--

Oh.

Uh, yep.

Yeah, it looks like semen.

- Hmm. - What?

Uh, fill out this.

And, um...

doctor will come and get you, all right?

Thanks.

Come on.

Thanks, Mum.

You know, I actually had a really shit time

being pregnant with you so,

I don't blame you if it isn't something

you want for yourself.

Uh, that's great.

Yeah, then again might have a really positive experience.

You might find some joy in it, eh?

Some bliss.

I found mine, eventually.

And maybe a baby isn't what you wanted at first, but...

maybe one day...

you'll look back at this time...

as the time you almost made the biggest mistake of your life.

But if you are pregnant...

maybe it's a sign from the universe.

- Hmm. - Hmm.

Yeah.

- Hmm. - Oh, look.

That's nothing to worry about.

Yeah. It's fine.

Totally fine.

- Well, what is it? - Oh, it's a PUPPP rash.

Yeah. I wouldn't worry too much.

I could probably suggest a cream if it's itchy.

Is it a bit itchy?

Okay, but what causes it?

Hormones.

But like I said, it's totally normal.

Oh, that's good.

No, no, no. It's actually not normal for me, so...

Is this your first pregnancy?

Am I pregnant?

- Aren't you? - No, I'm not.

I, I don't want to be.

Whoops. Sorry, my mistake.

What I meant to say was the PUPPP rash and the vomiting,

would indicate that you might actually be pregnant.

- So, congrats. - Oh!

Uh, alien pregnant?

No.

Well, we might book in for a scan

at 21 weeks with Judy. Uh, but until then, I'd just suggest

this as a normal human pregnancy.

- Oh, that'd be great. - No, because it wasn't

a normal human penis.

Lucky for some.

No, it had tentacles, okay? And vag-seeking acid spunk.

Yeah, normally I'd need a sample of that.

Okay. Probably some on these.

Yeah, I think they might be contaminated.

- Hmm. - Hmm.

Pop that in the bin.

No, no, no. You... you could do a test.

I'll pop it in the bin and we'll test it later.

Oh.

Fuckin' hell.

Oh.

- Whoa. - Oh.

- Oh. - Your... your breasts

are swelling, baby girl.

Oh, that's interesting.

- Oh. - Is it?

- Has that happened before? - What?

- No! Fuck! - Mary.

You'd probably be more comfortable

with a female doctor,

- wouldn't you? - Yes, probably.

Yeah. Okay.

I wonder who's on call.

Wait! No, no, wait. Please.

- Mary-- - Please make it stop.

Jesus Christ.

Do I have consent to touch your breasts?

- Yes. - Yes!

- Ow. - Mastitis.

Oh.

Sudden, onset mastitis.

Okay, it feels like shit. Please make a stop.

Is that nipple following me?

- What? - What?

Oh, Mary!

Um.

Wow. Okay. I'll just--

Ow! Back in a tick.

- What did you do? - Oh my God. What?

You shot him in the eye with your tits.

Oh, Mum.

He might not be able to see now. He's a doctor. He heals people.

Oh!

- Mum? - What?

I think I felt something move.

Hmm.

Okay.

Is everything okay?

Yeah, it might just be a bad angle.

We'll keep an eye on that anyway.

Excuse me. Can I help you?

Yes, can you do my daughter next, please?

- She might be alien pregnant. - No, I'm sorry. No, no.

- You can't be in here. - Mum, we shouldn't honestly.

- It's fine. - No, it's not. You stay.

No, you stay there.

Mum, we should go. Come on.

Mum, can-- Mum!

- Let's go. I'm sorry. - Don't worry about it.

- Don't worry about it. - Is she okay?

Yeah. We get a lot of big feelings in here,

a lot of heightened emotions.

I'm sorry we barged in like this.

There's nobody at reception.

It's okay. All right. Well, we can just see you now.

Come on.

Sorry. It's just a PUPPP rash.

- How many weeks are you? - I don't know.

Um...

His, his penis was like alien,

so I think maybe it's happening quite a bit faster.

Okay. Well, I don't know about that sort of thing.

This is an internal wand.

We're going to get a much clearer picture

at this early stage. Up to you, though.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Mum, Mum, please just turn around for this bit.

Now, you're going to be much more comfortable

on your side with your knees up.

Put your knees right up.

Thank you. Thank you.

There we go. Okay.

Coldness coming in now.

There you go.

All right.

Here's your uterus.

- Oh. - So if you are pregnant,

you should see a foetus right about...

There. Ow!

- Did you see that? - What?

I fucking told you there was something inside of me.

- Language! - I saw it.

- How big was it? - Oh, about 12 weeks.

- Oh. - Well, how big is that?

- Kumquat-size. - How big is that?

About that.

Oh. Is it too soon to know if it's a boy or a girl?

- Yeah, slightly too soon. - I want it out.

I want it out of me. I want it out of me right fucking now.

Hey. Well, it doesn't work like that.

Okay, you can talk to your GP,

but there's paperwork, tests, a meeting.

- Oh no, you don't! - What are you doing?!

No!

Oh.

Fuck off!

- What on earth was that? - Baby girl.

Oh, shit.

That was not okay.

Okay. Thank you.

Um, can you tell me where the toilet is, please?

Please.

Is it a poo?

Stop looking at me. I don't know what it is.

- Well, where's it coming out of? - Turn around.

It's not a poo.

Well, isn't that what you wanted?

Uh-huh.

Congratulations, I guess.

I don't think you went about it the right way, though.

I'm not going to flush, okay? Maybe we can be sure.

- I mean, that could be it. - How would we know?

I don't know.

The heavy bits might have gone down already, I guess.

Don't you think we ought to have

some kind of funeral or something?

No.

Are you hungry?

Yeah.

I think I might make us something.

Yeah, okay.

I haven't had anything to eat all day.

Yeah, same.

You know, when I was pregnant with you, I used to eat soap.

- What? - Bars of soap.

I had a craving for them.

I used to nibble on them.

Some of them tasted better than others.

Oh, Mum, that's so feral.

Hmm.

Oh, baby.

I'm sorry I made being a mum seem so awful.

You don't want to try it.

It's okay. I think you did me a favour.

I'm born again.

Hi, I'm Boo.

Sorry, excuse me. Um, is Mary home?

- Who is it? - Your baby daddy.

Oh, for fuck's sake, Mum.

Sorry, she's not feeling very well.

Oh, it's... it's okay. I can come back another time.

What does he want?

Just to say that I'm...

I'm very sorry about all of this.

All what?

Uh, just...

well, just, like, the whole pregnancy thing.

- Oh, it's not all your fault. - Mum...

I'm sorry, can you give us some space?

- Space? - Please.

Never mind, I'm already giving you 100% of the space

- you currently occupy. - Okay, sorry,

I need a little bit more.

- I can come back another time. - Like fuck you will.

- Mum. - What?

- You want me to leave? - Yes.

I'm not saying that.

Oh, look.

You guys have got a lot to talk about, I get it.

Talk it out.

Talk is good.

Are you going to come in?

Uh, yes.

Um, is your mum okay?

Not really, no. We've both had a really hard day, actually.

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.

- Shut the door. - Oh, sorry.

Your mum made you come over and do this?

What?

Yes.

Hmm.

She think I'm going to go to the police or something?

Yes.

Well, I aborted your spawn.

Oh, thank the fuck Christ.

Well, thank me, bitch.

I'm the one with the swollen vagina.

Sorry, thank you. Thank you. Um, uh,

- how... how are you feeling? - I feel shitty.

Hungry.

I could order you a pizza if you want.

- Yeah, okay. - Yeah?

Yeah.

Can you actually go in the kitchen

and see if there's ice cream?

Hmm. Yeah.

Okay, yeah.

Hey, so your penis is kind of like

proof of other intelligent life in the universe, right?

Um, uh...

yeah, I guess.

Maybe you should tell someone about it.

Hmm. Oh, I'd rather not. Thank you.

You could make a whole bunch of money off that.

Well, actually, I'm...

uh, I'm kind of a content creator.

- Hmm. - Yeah.

I... I have like an OnlyFans, um, but...

I don't really show my face.

Okay.

Huh.

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Random.

- Do you want some or something? - No, no.

I can... I can wait. Sorry.

So, um,

do you still want pizza?

Oh no.

- Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. - What, is it the ice cream?

Whoa, no.

Maybe you're like lactose intolerant or something?

What should I do? What should I do?

- Fuck! - What should I do? Fuck!

Oh, fuck. Call an ambulance.

Sorry, um, is there anything else I can do?

What?

I have a very big fear of doctors, and my mum said

- that if they ever, like, saw... - This...

- ...my penis. - ...isn't about you.

Sorry, sorry. Um, I think

maybe we should get our story straight.

Excuse me?

Just... just in case they ask to talk to you.

No, no, no, I... I can do it.

I can do it.

Yes. May I have one ambulance, please?

Yes my friend is, um, just vomiting a lot.

Uh, yes, uh, unit B.

Uh, is... is... is there blood in the vomit?

No, but it's fucking blue.

Okay, but it's very severe.

Um...

Um. Oh f--

What happened?

- Uh, ambulance is on the way. - What did they say?

Um, uh, nothing.

Well, why the fuck did you hang up?

Oh, oh, just, look, um...

They asked for my name, and I don't want

to get too involved, so...

Oh, I'd say you're pretty fucking involved.

Yeah, I know but, can you please not say that to them?

What the fuck am I supposed to say?

Some kind of immaculate shit?

I... I don't know, just say it was the ice cream.

It's not the ice cream!

Okay, okay, yes. But when you get there,

can you please not tell them

- like, who I am? Who-- - When I get there?

Oh, sorry. Okay, when the ambulance gets here...

- Oh, where are you going to be? - What? Why?

Because you're going to come with me.

What, am I? No, no, no, what about... what about you?

Yeah, they have to see your penis.

No, no, no, my, my mum

- would shit in her pants at me! - I'm going to shit in my pants

at you right fucking now.

Can you just, like, not manage it?

I've been managing it,

but I'm sick of being at the back of the fucking line,

like a mental fucking crazy lady. It's embarrassing.

I have to ask my mum.

I'm sorry, what?

- I have to ask my mum. - Oh!

Did you ask your mum before you fucking came on me?

Yeah, they came back for me a second time

after my first trimester, and Boo a couple of times.

Oh my God, I'm so sorry.

Look, honestly, it's fine, Cynthia.

Oh, I know, I just mean

'cause you never asked for any of this, eh?

Oh, well, that's not entirely true. I just, um...

didn't, uh, figure I'd wind up getting pregnant.

It's probably a little...

naive on my part.

What are they like?

I don't really talk about it.

People can be a, uh,

a little cruel.

- Yeah, well, people, eh? - Wait.

I don't hear anything.

Shh, shh.

- What? - What's that?

Hmm?

It could be for someone else.

So they were alone together?

Well, she asked me to leave.

What, your own house?

Well, they needed some privacy. They aren't kids.

- Oh no. - Is this all from your vagina?

No, Mum, it's vomit.

It's getting all in your hair.

Boo, there's an ambulance coming. We should go.

Don't worry about the mess, sweetie.

- Boo! - Um, I think

maybe I have to do this.

Oh, we've got a mop.

Okay, what you have to do

is you just have to listen to your mother.

- I'm not a child. Okay? - Yes, you are. You're my child.

I haven't spent my whole life protecting you just to watch

you follow some skank into the lion's den.

- Sorry, Cynthia. - Oh, it's fine.

If she's a skank, then what are you?

- Hello, am I in the right place? - I'm afraid so.

Did someone call an ambulance?

Yes, I did.

- Someone's been vomiting? - Yeah, I'm down here.

Well, hello, what's your name?

- Mary. - Hello, Mary.

Do you think you can make it out to the van?

- Yeah. - It's all a bit

- intense in here, eh? - We... we're just leaving.

- Mum, Mum, get off, Mum. - Come on.

Mum, stop.

It's okay, I can walk.

- Boo, she can walk. - I'm going with her.

Yeah, one support person max with us, sorry.

Which should be the mother, right?

- It has to be Boo. - Does it?

Why?

Um...

'cause I have to show them my penis.

You walk out that door and you're on your own.

Sorry.

Hey, thank you.

Oi, what the fuck?

It's for the notes.

Boo, can you...

Sorry.

Right.

I... I'm not sick.

Oh, bless.

He's got the right attitude.

Sorry.

I can't do this with you, okay.

I can't...

I can't even look after myself.

It wouldn't be good, okay?

So...

I don't even. I don't... I don't even know what you are.

I'm sorry.

Kia ora, Mary. Hi.

My name's Detective Sergeant Maunga.

I've been called in to see whether or not

we need to take you into custody, all right?

- Yep. Cool, hi. - Okay.

How are you doing?

- Uh, a bit shit, yeah. - Yeah? Okay.

So, do you mind telling me what happened?

So there was a guy and he ejaculated on my pants

and he had an alien penis.

Um...

Weird stuff started happening because I guess,

like, I'm pregnant now.

- Congratulations. - No, no, no.

I tried to get rid of it. I don't think it worked

because I was vomiting before.

And so then me and the guy, we came here.

So what's the plan, Rob?

Eh, for what?

Um, for my abortion.

A--

Well, I'm not sure.

So...

Where are we going?

Well, you're headed for the birth care unit,

I know that much.

No, I don't need birth care.

It's just what we call the place for all the baby-related things.

Okay, well, it's not a baby.

Look, I think, um, maybe you should discuss it

with your obstetrician when they've examined you.

- Oh. Here we are. - No, wait.

Wait. What... what about them?

No. We're going to a different level.

Oh, but we're together.

- Are you? - That's okay.

He's not sick, okay?

He's my emotional support person.

Yeah, I'm just going to go. If that's all right.

Mary, I'm going to need you to not touch the other patient

- for both your safety. - He's not a patient.

Aren't you my doctor?

You need to be treated separately.

Wait, what? Get off of me!

- What the fuck? Stop! - No, no, no.

- Hey, hey, hey! - No!

- Stop! - Mary! Mary, help me!

- Mary! Mary! - Stop!

Don't let them take me!

I'm father of the baby! Mary, please!

Hmm.

How is he?

Well, he's sedated while they try and reattach his finger,

which you pulled off, accidentally.

Mm-hmm.

I was just trying to hold his hand.

- Right. - And the doctors were also

pulling on him, so I hope that you...

you should go and talk to them as well, maybe.

The finger guy, is this the same guy who...

ejaculated on you?

- Yep. - Yeah.

With an "alien penis"?

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

And the ejaculation event,

uh, did this raise any issues of consent?

- Uh, yep. - Right.

Would you like to file a complaint?

No.

No?

- No. - Okay.

Do you wish him any further harm?

Not at this time, no.

- No? - Mm-hmm.

Okay, I'll put down "no".

Okay, um...

Hmm.

Listen, Mary...

he may still press charges when he wakes up,

but for now, I think you're good to go.

What? No.

Yeah, well, I mean, there's nothing else.

Is there-- Was there something else?

Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, the...

...the alien stuff.

Oh, well, it's not illegal to have a weird penis.

Right, but...

is there, like, a department or something that can, like,

work with alien pregnancies, or is there maybe someone that,

- like, you could call? - You mean like a--

You mean like a man in black?

Yeah, nah, nah, we don't have one of those.

I mean, if we did, no one's told me about it,

so, hmm, classic.

If there's anything else, I'll let you know, okay?

- Yeah. - Awesome. Hey, good luck.

- Thank you. - You're gonna be a mum. Whoa!

Yeesh.

Hello, I'm looking for someone with an alien penis.

- Are they a patient? - Yeah.

Are you a relative?

Sort of. Sort of a relative.

Patient's last name?

Um, I don't... I don't know his last name.

Then you're not a relative, are you?

Well, his baby is inside of me, so I think that that makes us--

- Married? - What? No, no.

His first name is Boo.

He came here today with me in an ambulance,

and he has an alien penis.

How many people like that would you even get in a day?

No need to raise your voice.

Boo is in surgery, not seeing visitors.

Maybe try again tomorrow.

- How many times... - Mary?

Mary! You look terrible. Is that your blood?

- No. - Where's Boo?

I'm sorry, are you a relative?

I'm his mother.

Uh, sorry, ladies, I will need you

to wait in the family room.

- That's my son. - I'll go next.

What do you think you're doing to him?

We've reattached the finger.

Team have done a fabulous job, above and beyond, actually.

- Now we're just running tests. - Stop staring at him

and put his pants back on, please.

Whoa, we haven't finished treating him,

- and you shouldn't be in here. - He is not sick.

We don't know what he is.

He is my special boy, so I need you to wake him up,

get him dressed, because we are going home.

You're the sick one.

- Shame on you, doctor. - I want to be next.

- Now, I need all of these... - ...do tests on me, okay?

I want an abortion.

Okay, Mary, let's do that, shall we?

Shall we start that process?

Now, do you reckon this pregnancy is having a...

negative impact on your emotional

- and your physical well-being? - Yes.

Okay, cool, cool.

We will need to do a full psychiatric assessment

just to make sure that you're in the right frame of mind

to be making this very important decision.

- Fuck that. - That's pretty standard.

Hmm. And then, of course, there will be scans

and blood tests, probably a pelvic examination.

If we're going to do that, we'll just,

- No. - ...refer you to the nearest

- clinic for the actual-- - No, it needs to be now.

It's growing, okay? So it has to be now. Now!

Yeah, it's hard.

I wish you'd stop pitying me and actually fucking help me.

- They're doing their best. - Hey, look,

if the baby's showing signs of distress,

I'm totally okay with just looking into the possibility

- of an emergency caesar. - I am showing distress signs

right now and it's not a baby, okay? It's a fucking alien!

Hey, you might want to just watch your language

if you want to be taken seriously.

He's a health professional.

Could someone please get me a wheelchair for my son?

Thank you.

Here we go. Thank you.

Why must you make this all so humiliating?

Okay. We're gunna go.

Come on.

What happened to your hair?

Yeah, it burnt. Come on.

- Let's go. Up we go. - Oh, come on.

- You're okay. - Oh, am I in trouble?

No, no, no, we're just leaving.

Up you get, baby girl. Come on.

Oh, uh, sorry, you haven't been officially discharged.

We should stop for some supplements.

- Hmm. - You need folic acid at least.

- And iron. - Hmm.

- Magnesium. - Vitamin D.

And fish oil.

- Activated charcoal... - Yes ginger. Ginger.

- Milk thistle. - Yes, that's very good.

- We should all be taking that. - Don't forget to engage ♪

- Where are you going? - Don't follow me.

Oh!

Oh, we should go after her?

Hmm, I think she just needs some space.

But it's not safe.

Hmm, nowhere is safe.

♪ Putting all my haters In a graveyard ♪

♪ You mustn't know me Cos I play hard ♪

♪ I'm not your baby ♪

♪ I know you love it ♪

♪ Telling me I've peaked When I'm just getting started ♪

♪ I know you love it ♪

Get off!

Wassup!

♪ ...One-hit-wonder Desperado with your bravado ♪

♪ Call me a slut When I dress like that ♪

♪ Gonna chain me up ♪

- ♪ Call me a slut... ♪ - Hey, look out!

Fuck! Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!

Get the fuck out of the car, I'm gonna puke!

Do you think she's dead?

Huh, come on.

We should take her to the hospital.

No, I... I think she needs some sugar, you know?

Hey look, I'm just glad you're not dead, just saying.

Are you pregnant?

Yeah, I'm trying not to be.

Hmm.

One time my cousin Trish put a condom

on her mum's vacuum cleaner and stuck it up there.

Wow, Trish.

What, did she have like a massive vag or something?

No, she used the crevice tool.

- Oh, does it actually work? - Yeah, I think so.

Hmm, does anyone have a condom?

Oh yeah.

Thanks.

Oh.

Oh, look, it doesn't seem safe.

This is a ridiculous idea.

Are you drunk?

You don't have to agree with me, Mum,

you just have to hold it off the ground for a second.

I think we need to put down a tarp.

- Do you have one? - Uh.

Why are you doing this here?

Well, there's more space, and also...

I did jizz on her.

Oh look, I'd feel better

if we had a talk about this at our place.

- Hmm. - Yep, okay, let's do that.

Great.

Come on.

I really don't want my vacuum cleaner involved.

I really don't want her to get an infection or worse.

Um,

sorry, I'm not outside yet.

Baby girl!

Don't you think it could be the hormones talking?

Well then I agree with them.

Oh.

Um.

Hey, do you think that when this is done

that we can maybe still hang out?

Shit is a little bit full on for me at the moment, okay?

- Sorry, sorry. - No, it's all good.

We can do anything if I survive this, okay?

- Okay. - And if you survive.

Wait, why, why wouldn't I survive?

- Hand me that fucker. - Oh, yep.

Turn around for this bit.

Oh, okay, yep.

I can't reach pass my fucking belly.

Okay, try... try it

- from behind maybe. - Don't tell her that.

Well, she wants to get it out, Cynthia.

Baby girl, I've got a bad feeling about this.

I think... I think it's all the way in.

Oh, no, no, no, that'll be your cervix.

You need to get behind that.

- Stop helping her. - How?

You need to relax and open the front door.

Drinking water can be good.

Sex is supposed to be helpful too.

Oh, yes, yes. I... I used to find it helpful to picture

a rosebud opening in the sun.

Mary?

Are you okay?

Son, if you want to see her again,

you open that front door right now.

Sorry.

- Boo, switch it on at the wall. - Okay.

I don't-- Just...

just close the door.

- This is crazy. - Stay out of it, Mum.

This isn't safe.

Nothing is safe for me right now.

So?

- Don't. - Let's do nothing.

- Oh, hey. Everybody okay? - Mum.

Baby girl where are you?

- Mum? - I'm just...

- Mum? - Just hold on.

Oh, my phone is not turning on.

Oh my God.

Where is she?

Are you okay, baby girl?

Did you get it out?

Be careful.

Maybe your waters broke.

What does that mean?

Boo.

I'm not... I'm not doing anything!

Oh, shit.

I think I am.

Oh, oh, it feels...

Jesus

Cut it out of me! Cut it out,

- just cut it out, cut it out! - It's okay. It's coming down!

It's not okay!

I'm sorry, I mean it will be okay.

What are you talking about?

Well, we all just need to stay calm and call an ambulance!

I...

I think I'm okay, maybe.

Yeah, that was a contraction, baby.

I think it's gonna happen again.

Fuck that, eh?

Go and ask the neighbours to borrow their phone, please.

- Why me? - Because you jizzed on her.

I... I don't really know them that well,

and it is quite dark outside.

Oh look. Ann, maybe... maybe you just go yourself,

you know, just for time.

I, yet again, am cleaning up your mess.

Sorry, Mary.

Um...

- Sorry, sorry about my mum. - Well, don't apologise to us.

Sorry.

You can apologise to me.

Okay, sorry.

- Get me water. - Please.

Water, sure. Yeah. Uh...

This isn't how I imagined us having this moment, baby.

Please don't say something

like you're glad anyway.

Okay, I won't.

I was gonna say that, so I'm glad you said something.

More.

- Uh, sure. - Please.

Oh, my mouth.

Feels like, dry shit.

Oh well, water is good,

- 'cause it's important. - Okay, great. Thank you.

Sorry.

Oh.

Uh, more?

- Please. - Yeah. Okay.

See, that wasn't so hard, was it?

- Was it too much water? - Oh, where the fuck is your mum?

I don't know. She... she only just left!

This is a contraction. It's normal.

I was having contractions for a week before you were born.

In the car, at the shops,

out fishing.

Fuck that! Oh, I need a sharp knife!

- No you don't. - Sorry, um,

we don't have any sharp knives.

- Oh, fucking find one! - Okay.

Mary, seriously we need to sanitise

the tarp and everything!

We don't seem to have-- Ow!

What was that?

- Uh, no. - Sanitise it.

- Mary, stop this. - Okay, yep.

We need to wait for the professionals.

They can stitch me up when they get here.

Well, why not let them do the cutting, too?

Mum...

I'm gonna do this.

And I need your help to stop the bleeding.

- I don't like it! - Give me that!

I can't breathe!

Give it to me!

Jesus Christ...

I'm gonna need a first aid kit

if you're gunna start doing that--

Mary, no! Oh, Boo, help me!

No! Mary, no! No!

Are you okay?

- Uh, me? - No.

I'm still pregnant, so no.

Let's not try that again.

It needs to come out. It needs to come out.

Oh, I just have this huge urge.

What... what is that?

- It might be the mucus plug. - What the...

No that thing, um, looks like an egg.

Um, baby girl, maybe just hold back on your urges

for now until we get you to the hospital.

I have to fart or shit or something.

- Oh! Well, uh... - Fuck!

...probably do that here before we get my car.

Sorry, um, can we please not do poos in the lounge?

No time!

How are... how are you doing it? -

Everyone okay?

Mary's just farting and then we get you in my car.

- Oh, ambulance is on the way. - Oh God, what took you so long?

Oh, some of the neighbours are having trouble

- with their phones too. - Oh God, which ones?

Mum!

Boo! Help!

Help!

Itis sucking me in!

Well, stop farting! You're making it bigger!

- No, no, no! - No, no, no!

No!

Don't get stuck in there!

- Ow, my finger! My finger! - Mum! Mum!

Stop! Mum! Oh no, Mum, I'm stuck!

Baby girl.

- Stop farting! - I'm trying!

- It's sucking me in! - Oh baby girl!

- Help! - Baby girl!

Eww.

- Oh my God! - What is it?

- What happened? - Something touched me.

- Was it Mary? - Um, maybe.

- It touched my knee. - Oh, is she okay in there?

- I don't know. I-- - Shh, shh!

- It is Mary. - What's she saying?

Maybe it's general screaming.

No, she's definitely saying something, Boo.

We can't--

Sorry!

- Sorry, Sorry. - What is it? What is it?

Sorry, no, she's tapping on my knee again.

Um, I think. I think she's trying to communicate.

Well, what's she trying to say now?

I don't know. Maybe she's asking, like, if I'm okay.

Well, maybe you should ask her if she's okay, honey.

Yeah. Ask her if anything's happening yet.

Yeah. But how do I do that?

- Well, with your body language? - And be supportive.

Um...

Okay.

No. No. No, Mum.

Mum, please don't! No, no, no, no.

Good evening. I'm Sofia, this is my partner Sophie,

- I just call her Soph. - Hey.

- Can we come in? - Uh, yes.

But you should know the place is a bit of a mess.

Oh, seen worse.

Oh, really?

Yeah, nah. Um, what exactly is going on here?

My daughter's having a very difficult pregnancy.

And, um, she's inside this nest thing.

It just kind of grew by itself, it's...

Does she have a midwife or are you the...?

Me? Me? No.

No, no, this is just my flat.

And no, we don't have a midwife.

Um, everything's been happening a bit too fast

to book anything in.

And how about you, son? Are you breathing okay?

Um, yes, I'm going good, thank you.

Okay, good. And your partner's inside there.

Is she okay? Any... any movement?

Um, well, technically, she's not my partner.

Uh, yes. Uh, yes.

Yes. Something... something is happening. Um, I,

I think we're communicating.

- Um... - What exactly?

What is she saying, honey?

Nothing at all.

Okay well, normally I'd suggest we get the fire department

in to deal with this sort of a mess.

But I think we should just pull them out.

Wait, wait, wait! Hold on, wait, wait, wait!

Um, I think I'm okay here now.

This isn't about you.

My baby girl's in there.

- She's okay as well. I think. - And how can you tell?

The lady asked you a question, honey.

Spit it out.

She took off my pants.

Ugh.

Oh, God.

I'm so sorry.

Nobody look at me!

Oh yeah.

Could be keen eh?

Ow!

How's it going in there, Boo?

Um, fine.

You need anything?

Some water?

Some electrolytes?

Um, maybe, like, uh, stop talking to me, thank you.

I had a terrible time giving birth to baby girl.

Took ages.

In the end, they had to put the forceps right up there

- and pull her out. - Jesus.

- Hmm. - Did you try, you know...

- getting jiggy with it? - No, I didn't, actually.

Try what?

Right, fun's over, let's pull him out, Soph?

- Yeah. - It's gonna be okay, baby boy.

One, two, three!

Baby, you did it!

You're a mum!

Uh, what?

Oh, hang on a minute. They want to talk to you.

Hold that. Hold that.

G'day, Mary.

Congrats. Can I come in?

Um.

Soph, better come in and take a look at the baby.

Yeah.

Bag, please.

How you doing?

Having a bit of a time?

- Yeah. - Yeah, mate.

I'm just gonna check your pulse first.

Okay, did you want me to put a cable tie on this umbilical?

Will it help?

Some mothers choose to wait till it stops pulsating.

Why?

It just gives the baby time to get more nutrients

- from your blood. - No, no, it's had enough.

Is there more? Oh fuck, am I having twins?

No, it might just be the placenta, okay?

- Uh-huh. - Baby girl's a mum.

Shut up!

Is it bad?

No, look, it's nothing some stitches won't fix.

- How's little one, Soph? - Yeah, seems okay.

Um, I just don't know what's normal around here,

um, and it has a tail.

- Is it breathing? - Yes.

Okay, well, wrap it in your towel.

Look, I think the two of you better go for a ride, eh?

Oh, can we do it here?

The stitches maybe, but it won't be as pretty

as... as the doctor's, and I'm not quite sure

what we can do if... if the baby needs help.

Okay, well, that's not my fucking problem.

Mary, you sound like a bad...

Bad what?

Person.

I know that you think that this is cute.

Huh?

It's a miracle of life.

Yes, I--

But I don't want to be a mother.

Okay?

I did not agree to this.

And I still don't.

Okay... okay how about some temporary stitches now,

and then taking baby to the hospital

- can be Papa's problem. - Thank you.

I love you.

I love you too, Mum.

Now, did you want to put this up your bum, or shall I?

Oh go on then.

Can somebody please pull up my son's pants?

Bags not.

Did you see it?

What? The baby?

No, my... my pee-pee, she... she crushed it,

- and I... I can't feel anymore. - Okay, you're a father now,

Boo, okay? You've got to stop thinking about your pee-pee.

It's not all about you anymore, all right? Arm up.

Congrats.

Um.

Not sure if it's a girl or a boy, though.

Some mysteries there.

Want to have a cuddle?

Um, I'm okay. You're doing great, too. Thank you.

I think it likes you.

I don't... I don't want to get too attached to it,

maybe just like give it to Mary.

Uh, she said you'll take care of it.

- In what way? - In all the ways. Here.

Support the head. For God's sake.

- Which way is the head? - The opposite end from the tail.

The what?

Oh.

What... what are you looking at?

Baby has a tail.

Ew, that's not my fucking fault, is it?

Hmm?

Mum!

Mummy!

Mum. Mum.

Okay, you're going to need to clean this whole thing up,

- okay? It's started to turn. - Look, look!

Mum! Mum, I have a breast.

It's sucking my blood like a vampire.

And you did the same thing

but I didn't start screaming about it! Did I?

What... what did you do?

Just put you on the other breast.

No, no, no, no. No, I am... I am not doing that.

Okay, well then go and buy some formula.

Can you go get me some, please?

- No! - Please.

Are you even keeping her?

Well, then why would I bother buying you formula?

To make it stop screaming. It's just...

Oh, just put it on the breast.

- No, but it hurts. - Yeah, I know.

I breastfed you for four years.

Just wait till she has teeth, honey.

Well, at least I was like, uh, human.

You were close enough.

So is she.

Look, it's not so bad if you get a good latch.

She'll probably just go straight to sleep.

There we go.

That's it. That's it. And here we go.

Ah, it is sensitive.

There we go. Come on. Yep. There we go.

There we go. That's it.

That looks pretty good.

Always feels a bit funny at the start.

- God, this place smells. - What?

Could be that placenta going off.

- Oh, get rid of it. - No! You get rid of it, Boo.

- Oh, shit. Oh, what do we do? - Throw it in the bin.

- What if it's start to scream? - No, not the baby.

The blanket.

- Shit. - Oh, just clean it up.

Well, I've got a lot going on. Can you do it?

No, I am setting a boundary.

You've got to start cleaning up your own mess,

- Boo. - What about Mary?

Oh, the woman you ejaculated on. What about her?

Where is she?

Oh, shit.

Oh, fucking ow.

Are you okay in there?

- Do you need any help? - No, I'm fine.

Okay. Well, let me know

if another pair of hands would be useful.

I'm speaking from experience here,

because you ripped me from my pink to my stink.

Oh, loving that mental image. Thank you so much, Mum.

It took me more than a year to get over it.

I had to take painkillers just to do number two.

The blood has dried, and it's glued the nappy to my gooch.

Oh.

Is it all right if I take a look?

Yeah, since when do we have boundaries?

You've had so many people all up in your business.

I thought you might need some space.

No, it's all good, but I do appreciate you asking.

- Thank you. - Okay.

Let's see if we can get this thing wet, shall we?

Oh, oh my God, it's already happening.

- It's okay. - I'm sorry.

- It's stinging, it's stinging. - It's okay.

- Ow! - It's okay.

It's only natural.

Embrace the flow.

groans

Okay.

I really appreciate you, Mum.

I appreciate you too, Mary.

Oh!

Oh! Fucking hell!

There we go. There we go.

Oh, yeah.

Actually kind of cute, huh?

Okay.

Okay. Well, uh, this is it.

Uh, you know, maybe we'll see each other again, you know?

Because I'll, you know, come find you,

and you'll be famous.

- Oh shit, sorry, wrong house. - Hey, get back here.

Were you about to leave this baby here?

No, no. Wait...

do you, uh, wait, do you want me to?

No, I don't want you to. That's kind of fucked up.

Honey!

This guy's trying to leave us his baby.

We don't need any more babies.

Yeah, I told him.

Let me see.

It's quite cute.

Why does he look like that?

Kind of have like an alien penis, and...

looks a bit like that.

And so, yeah, that's the truth.

No shame, mate. No shame.

But hey...

it gets easier.

- Really? - Definitely.

- Boo! - Oh! Oh.

- Haha. - Hey, hi.

- Hi. - Hi, Mary.

Uh, uh, nice to... nice to see you.

- My mum said you have titties. - No, um...

yeah. Uh, well, it's just like... it's just one tit.

But my mum said I should

let the baby latch onto the other one,

just so like, um, even them out.

Smart. Nice.

Uh, how... how... how are you?

I'm all good. Just like, full force pissing my pants

every time I sneeze.

- That's hot. - Ew.

Sorry, sorry. Um, uh, can I help in any way?

Thanks.

But, you know, I've got my mum.

Mums, eh?

Uh, frickin' eh.

Want to come over to my house, watch some shit on TV sometime?

Yes. Sorry, yeah. Yes, please.

- Thank you, yeah. - Okay. Cool.

- I better go do some dad stuff. - Yeah.

- Yeah. - Hey, Boo,

does the baby have a name?

Um, no.

Oh. You should give it a name.

Yeah.

Hey, um, you...

you know that you're welcome to have a cuddle

anytime you want. You know, if you want.

Yeah...

Nah.

♪ Disease is creeping over me And I can't help but do wrong ♪

♪ Until I'm standing out On your lawn ♪

♪ The breeze is creeping over me And I can't help but feel warm ♪

♪ Until I'm standing out On your lawn ♪

♪ Disease is creeping over me And I can't help but do wrong ♪

♪ Until I'm standing out On your lawn ♪