Original subtitles

My feelings are always spinning around and around!

I'm Shinobu!

Gaboraa!

I'm a female ninja, Watashi Kunoichi

Two times two equals Shinobu! Ninin ga Shinobu desu

I'm a trainee, but... Minarai dakedo

...I'm on the path to becoming a ninja ninja no michi wo mashigura

Let's learn ninja techniques, Manabo ninpo

Nin-Nin! Let's learn ninja techniques, Manabo ninpo

Nin-Nin!

Finally today, the great transformation kyou koso daihenshin

Chant the spell, Jyumon tonaete

What's this magnificent, yet naughty, sight? a bold pose, I'm going to nail it daitan pozu kimete mimasu

What's this magnificent, yet naughty, sight?

Let's go, close your eyes, take a deep breath Iku yo me wo tojite shinkokyuu shite

Suuu~! Let's go, close your eyes, take a deep breath Iku yo me wo tojite shinkokyuu shite

Suuu~!

Ninja Technique: Art of the Doppelganger Ninpo bunshin no jutsu

One, two, three, four! One, two, three, four! Ichi ni san shi

Oh my, that's weird Arya-rya-rya hen ne

Big time, big time, Buchake buchake

Lots of mishaps Shippai ippai

Watch this, this time it's ninja stars Mitete kondo wa shuriken

One, two, three, four! One, two, three, four! Ichi ni san shi

Hopefully this will work Nantoka naare

Ei-ya, Ei-ya! Ei-ya, Ei-ya!

It's sink or swim Ichikabachika de

Watch this, my power's at it's max Mitete pawaa wa zenkai

I'll be stronger tomorrow, Shinobu Asu wa motto tsuyoku narimasu Shinobu

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! I'll be stronger tomorrow, Shinobu Asu wa motto tsuyoku narimasu Shinobu

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

I'm a ninja Ninja desu

This story is about the super handsome boy, Onsokumaru...

...and the beautiful women that surround him.

It's an anime filled with love, lust, and unexpected nudity...

Ninjas Elated over Cherry Blossom Viewing!

Ninjas Elated over Chervy Blossom Viewing Ninjas Elated over Cherry Blossom Viewing!

Ninjas Elated over Chewy Blossom Viewing

The spring's warm weather...

Guys...

I'm sure you guys can hardly contain yourselves.

That's not true... That's not true!

I don't know what makes you think that!

That's right! That's right!

That's what spring is all about!

Everyone's so energetic... That's what spring is all about!

Everyone's so energetic...

Everyone loves spring.

Plus, today's the planned date of our annual spring event!

Annual spring event?

Ding Ding Ding! Receiving female radio waves!

Currently decoding!

No! Limitations reached! Unable to decode!

You...

Time out!

The answer is...

Cherry...

...Blossom...

...Viewing...

...Party...

The Cherry Blossom Viewing Party!

That's right!

Speaking of annual spring events, we have the Cherry Blossom Viewing Party!

The winner!

Congratulations!

What? What's going on?

Take it! Accept it! It's a gift!

Listen to me!

Make sure you're ready for the Cherry Blossom Party...

...by the time this newborn Thomson's Gazelle is able to stand!

We've been ready sir!

We can't wait until it stands!

Good! I understand how you feel. You've got balls.

Then, off we go immediately!

Today's a perfect day to have the Cherry Blossom Party!

We're going to party, party, party!

Yeah! Yeah!

Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray!

Hip Hip Hooray!

Victory! Hip Hip Hooray!

Victory!

Today's weather

It's raining... It's raining...

It's raining... It's raining!

Drizzle drizzle drip, drizzle drip...

Drizzle drip... Drizzle drip...

It's almost like that energy from before was all a lie...

I don't care about the others...

Just me... If anyone, spare me...

Those are the lines from the musical we were going to perform...

...at the Cherry Blossom Party today!

I'll give you all the money you want...

He thinks he's on stage!

Amazing! That's amazing acting!

Khorosho! (Czecheslovkian for "amazing")

Khorosho! Khorosho! (Czecheslovkian for "amazing")

That was so touching...

You think?

Is everyone getting hungry?

Why don't we eat lunch and watch the rain?

I have no objections!

I love it! I love those white things with salmon!

No! Our lunch!

They were instantly singed into white dust...

Abura...

...katabura!

Switch on!

Onsokumaru! Onsokumaru!

Carapacho!

Unbelievable!

What's going on?

Onsokumaru!

Can you please explain this strange, yet heartwarming event?

Spreading ash which makes flowers bloom...

Gulp! Gulp!

This must be the legendary ninja technique...

Flower Blooming GG!

“Flower Bloonnina C262“ Flower Blooming GG!

"Flower Blooming Q&'

It can't be!

That ninja technique is from a fable!

And you're saying a user is among us?

Impossible! I must be jumping to conclusions!

There is no way a novice ninja, like Shinobu...

...could use such an ultimate high-level ninja technique like that...

Oh! I did it too.

Good job!

Look! I can grow one here, too!

What? What are you doing?

Whoa! Amazing.

What a stupid looking character!

Onsokumaru! Please don't ask any questions...

Just take this lollipop.

And then, please say something!

I'm going to access your heart now...

He's so stupid!

What the hell are you making me do, you bastards!?

Sorry, we didn't have a choice.

Anyway, this ninja technique is a blessing to us right now.

Good timing.

Let's make flowers bloom in the house...

...and have another shot at our Cherry Blossom Viewing Party!

Yes!

Ninja Technique Flower Blooming GG!

Huh?

Huh? Huh? Huh?

The perverted bamboo shoots tore off my clothes!

What the hell is that?

My turn next!

Ow! Don't worry about me! Hurry! Run!

You failed, too?

All right guys! Keep your eyes peeled!

I'll show you how it's done!

You get cherry blossoms...

...to bloom like this!

What is this?

What is this?

Umm... Umm...

Ah! This is... the world's largest flower. A Rafflesia!

Toot

Toot Smells like poop! It stinks like shit!

At least we finally got something that looks like a flower to bloom.

I give up. Let's eat lunch watching this flower.

Umm... Our lunch menu for today is...

Scratch that idea!

Damn it! We're going to get cherry blossoms to bloom...

...even if it kills us!

This is becoming such a pain, Onsokumaru...

Call me Captain, you bastard!

But why are we going on an expedition?

It's not that bad!

Think of it as an alternative to the party.

So it does exist!

It's a scoop! This one's gonna sell!

Are you sure that's not a toy?

It's so small...

All right, everyone!

Now we go on our underwater expedition!

Like I said...

Our goal is to discover...

...the secret of the Saint Mary that lies beneath this lake!

What?

There's nothing there. Jeez...

Listen up, you bastards!

Um... I think we should leave this pond alone.

Plus, it's not really a lake...

What are you acting so scared for!?

Recently... I heard a fugitive crocodile lives in the pond.

What the hell? Don't make me laugh!

I'm a man of Edo!

No croc scares the man in me!

No way! What is this thing!

Someone help me! I'm scared!

It only took a second for him...

...to get into a life threatening situation!

Wow, danger suits him so well!

Hey! Do something!

Let's see...

Apparently, there are two types. There's the usually passive alligator...

...and the aggressive crocodiles!

I had no idea!

Whatigator?! I had no idea!

Whatigator?!

W-Who cares about that?!

Hurry up and save me!

If you see its teeth facing up and down with its mouth closed, it's a crocodile!

Which one is it?

You idiots!

If it closes its mouth, it won't matter anymore!

Sasuke! Do something!

I... I think mosaics are a part of Japanese culture, so...

You bastard!

Are you saying, "It's no use. Let's give up?"

Use your weapons! Use your ninja stars!

I don't have any ninja stars on me.

Sasuke, what about you?

Well, actually, I... don't have any either.

What about you?

Yes, hold on!

Here.

They're so cute!

Can you let me off the hook for this?

What are you, a magician?

Jeez, aren't any of you going to do something?

Come on! Hurry up!

In that case, it's do or die!

Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!

Are you sure, Shinobu? Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!

Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!

Hold it, right there!

Are you sure you can do this?

Good luck! Shinobu ¥

Good luck! Shinobu ¥ Shinobu! Good luck! You can do it!

Shinobu! Good luck! You can do it!

Wait until the crocodile will least expect it... Shinobu! Good luck! You can do it!

I'll only have a second to save him. Shinobu! Good luck! You can do it!

Shinobu... You're so concerned about me...

What a cutie.

All right. I'll entrust you with my fate!

Wait for my opportunity.

Calm the heart...

...like still water.

Now!

That wasn't the right "Now"!

It's no use!

They're so late...

It's raining...

The ones in charge of getting a good spot It's raining...

The ones in charge of getting a good spot I wonder if we're really picnicking today.

The ones in charge of getting a good spot

The battery in my hand held game is dying...

It ran out...

Shinobu Goes on a Date with Kaede!

Shinobu Goes on a Pate with kaede Shinobu Goes on a Date with Kaede!

Shinobu Goes on a Pate with kaede

Okay. Time to...

Hello!

The same as before! It's me, Shinobu!

This marvelous twenty-first century!

How will you be spending your day?

I just combed it!

Hmm... Hmm... Hmm...

Mmmh“Mmmh“Mmmh“...

Are you by chance, going somewhere?

Yeah...

I'm going to the neighboring town to go shopping.

Such a journey!

Please be careful on your trip...

It only takes me ten minutes to get there.

Oh, that's right.

Shinobu, would you like to come too?

Are you sure?

I would love to go with you!

Getting ready on such short notice is a pain.

Yes, I haven't worn a tie in so long!

Hey, hey, hey... you guys...

Nobody invited you.

There's no need to get ready!

Hey, did you hear that Mr. Echigoya?

She thinks we're tagging along.

I know, how rude of her.

We're just getting ready...

...to go to a Happiness Club meeting.

Liar!

And what the heck is this "Happiness Club"?

Oh, you don't know?

We reflect the light off the back of CDs to blind crows.

We hold two-liter bottles upside-down against our crotches...

...so it looks like we're peeing insane amounts.

The rest is a club secret, so we can't tell you.

T-That's alright.

Oh, right! I just remembered!

I heard they're going to be doing...

...kiss readings by a beautiful fortuneteller at the Happiness Club today.

Ero-P! Ero-Ping! Ero-P!

We're wasting time! Let's go, Sasuke!

Hurry up and follow me!

No! This is Kaede's trap! Hurry up and follow me!

No! This is Kaede's trap!

No! This is Kaede's trap! Ero-ero-po-po. Ero-po-po.

First of all, the club doesn't even exist! Ero-ero-po-po. Ero-po-po.

First of all, the club doesn't even exist! I saw. I saw. I saw.

I saw. I saw. I saw.

Ero-ero-po-po. Ero-po-po.

Currently Accepting Enrollment for the Happiness Club! Secret moments between you and I... Ero-ero-po-po. Ero-po-po.

Currently Accepting Enrollment for the Happiness Club! Secret moments between you and I...

Hey! Shinobu! This way! This way!

Hurry! Hurry!

Please wait...

There are so many people, it's dizzying!

Shinobu!

Are you okay?

I'm sorry, Shinobu.

Be careful so we don't get separated.

Kaede...

I'm walking around the city holding Kaede's hand...

Yay! It's a date! It's a date!

Do you really think so? Yay! It's a date! It's a date!

Do you really think so?

Do you think we look like a couple right now?

Yes. I'm positive everyone thinks we're lovey-dovey.

W-Why are you guys here?

Well, you know...

Just to compete with you girls,

us guys are on a date too!

Woohoo! Let's go shopping!

Clothing and accessories!

Illegal porn tapes and high school chicks!

Where should we start?

Now, now. You're so happy...

...you're babbling about illegal purchases!

How do you think this miniskirt will look on me?

No! That means your upper body isn't clothed!

Stop acting giddy!

We got in trouble, boss.

I thought that's what you do on dates.

Did we get the wrong info?

Stop! Forgive me!

It's my first time! Be gentle! Stop! Forgive me!

It's my first time! Be gentle!

Shut up!

Sorry about that! Please excuse us.

In this city, if guys like you make a scene,

people are going to panic!

Is that because I'm special?

Anyway, put on a disguise at least!

If my friend sees you like this, who knows what will happen...

Kaede!

And what was I just saying?

Kaede! It's Kaede, right? Kaede!

I think that's your friend.

I have to get out of this situation, somehow.

Are you Kaede's friend?

Hello. Nice to meet you.

I'm Shinobu.

My occupation is a female ninja and...

...my feelings are always like a dream spinning around and around.

You're so funny!

Hey, is that headband part of your ninja look?

No, not exactly...

It's so cute! No, not exactly...

It's so cute!

Thank you so much!

Chance!

Sasuke! Onsokumaru!

Now's your chance to hide!

I'm mach-speed boy, Onsokumaru.

I'm the masked nobleman, Sasuke.

You guys are...?

Well, I guess we're Shinobu's guardians.

When did they...

Oh, guardia-

Why, hello!

Great weather, don't you think?

These people are...

Well, life has its strange ways, and...

He's so cute!

You're the ten thousandth person to say that about me. Congratulations...

Wow, lucky me!

Kaede, don't worry.

Usually, no one is surprised when they see Onsokumaru.

I wonder why?

Everyone! Let's go-go...

...and continue our happy-happy date!

Happy-happy go-go!

Go-go! Go-go!

I wonder if this is okay...

Thanks for the food! Thanks for the food!

Hey, Sasuke...

Yes?

Give me one-third, plus one-sixth, plus one-half of your steak.

Umm...

It took me a while, but that's the whole thing!

How can you be so selfish!

That's my line! How can you be so selfish!

That's my line!

Ninja Technique

What?!

All that for nothing?!

I will solemnly eat my steak.

You're Japanese! Eat salmon! Eat salmon!

That was yummy...

You cheap bastard! Idiot! You gorilla! That was yummy...

You cheap bastard! Idiot! You gorilla!

Now, now...

Let's not fight while we're eating.

It's half eaten, but I'll give you mine.

No fair, Onsokumaru!

Yeah! All mine!

You got a rare collectable, "food that's half-eaten by a girl," for free!

How wasteful! I'm jealous! How wasteful! I'm jealous!

Damn it!

Is this the outcome of timing and courage?!

Keep barking. Keep barking!

Let me hear the barks of a loser...

Ha-ha! Divine punishment! Divine Punishment!

S-Sasuke?

Maximum Strenath Drirrle Drirrle Laxative

Maximum Strenath Drirrle Drirgle Laxative

W-What the... Shinobu!

They're ninjas, but they were completely fooled!

How pathetic!

Who are you!?

My name is Miyabi!

A magic scroll?

I've heard of you!

In the private Ninja Academy in the Valley of the Ninjas...

...| heard there's a genius among the newly admitted students...

...in the Magic Department this year...

...and her name is...

...Miyabi!

What is that genius doing here?

Oh my. It's so smokey!

Hi, Sis!

Miyabi, when did you get here?

"Sis"?

Yes! Let me introduce you.

Miyabi is my adorable little sister!

Hey!

Hey, you!

Don't get uppity just because you happen to be her little sister!

Act a little cuter, will ya!

Then I'll start to feel good and then... and then...

Well, you know what I mean.

I came to check up on you and I was right.

Sis, if you keep hanging around this idiot...

...you'll be a ninja trainee forever!

No, I won't.

Onsokumaru is a good boy.

No, no!

I'll recommend you,

so quit being a ninja and transfer to the Magic Department.

I'm saying this because I'm worried about you!

But...

This is bad!

At this rate, Shinobu, the only sexy ninja in the Ninja Department...

...is going to be scouted!

Appear! Sasuke Army!

Sasuke Army...

...is here!

We'll protect Shinobu!

We'll show you the powers a ninja possesses!

She doesn't want to see...

Not even one shot? She doesn't want to see...

It's that magic scroll!

Okay. Let's counter the magic scroll with a magic scroll!

You know how to use magic scrolls?

122022000 ar 72 1A

Immortal The forbidden magic scroll!

The forbidden magic scroll!

Now, go fight to your heart's content!

That's not what I meant, you bastard! Now, go fight to your heart's content!

That's not what I meant, you bastard!

They're such pathetic ninjas!

Here we go, my dear magic scrolls. Beat them up!

Miyabi, watch out!

The magic scrolls won't listen to me! Help!

Miyabi!

Sis!

Watch out!

Sis...

W-We're saved...

That was so cool!

Not a single ninja star missed...

Are these ninjas secretly strong?

That was my first time throwing one!

Hello, mom? I just touched a ninja star for the first time!

So, ninja stars are made of iron...

Seriously?

Damn it!

You lost control of the magic scrolls...

...because of your lack of mental training!

Act a little cuter, will ya!

Then, I'll start to feel good and then... and then...

Well, you know what I mean.

Ow!

Thus, our first date...

I mean our shopping, ended terribly and...

What's with you and my sister?

Just friends? That's it? Something's fishy...

Hey! You're being rude to Kaede!

With Miyabi's appearance,

a little sister who's overly protective of Shinobu,

my room looks even more bizarre now.

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Hurry up!

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Gather around! Shugou

Made it in the nick of time, I slid in Giri giri seefu suberikonde

I jumped over the tough morning Kibishii asa wo tobikoeta

"What you said yesterday..." Kinou no hanashi

"...might have been a little white lie, " you said chotto duke uso kamo nante

I definitely have a long way to go with my training, Yappari shugyou busoku

Let's do it! Ganbarou

Turn turn turn, one day I'll become great Kuru kuru ri, rippa ni naru hi ga

Turn turn turn, turn turn turn Kuru kuru rii, kuru kuru rin

It's okay Daijoubu

"With prayer, flowers bloom," someone said Nenzureba Hana hiraku nante

It's an unreliable philosophy Tayori nai hitori goto

But I've got to try! Demo ganbaranakucha

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Hurry up!

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Break it up! Kaisan

Hurry up!

Shinobu, I thought ninjas were supposed to do things stealthily.

Yes, you're right.

But isn't your outfit a bit flashy for that?

Why is it pink?

Umm...

Don't tell me it's because you're the main character.

What? Well... the truth is...

The truth is?

Next episode of 2x2=Shinobuden!

"Onsokumaru Gets Angry" and...

..."Shinobu Leaves the Manor".

Originally, I was wearing a more inconspicuous color, but...

Unsakumaru Clef: Angry Shinabu Leaves the Manor Originally, I was wearing a more inconspicuous color, but...

Unsakumaru Clef: Angry Shinabu Leaves the Manor ...I was traumatized when my ear was bit by a mouse, so...

Onsokumavu Gets Angry Shinobu Leaves the Manor Liar.

Onsokumaru Gets Angry Shinobu Leaves the Manor