Original subtitles

My feelings are always spinning around and around!

I'm Shinobu!

Gaboraa!

I'm a female ninja, Watashi Kunoichi

Two times two equals Shinobu! Ninin ga Shinobu desu

I'm a trainee, but... Minarai dakedo

...I'm on the path to becoming a ninja ninja no michi wo mashigura

Let's learn ninja techniques, Manabo ninpo

Nin-Nin! Let's learn ninja techniques, Manabo ninpo

Nin-Nin!

Finally today, the great transformation kyou koso daihenshin

Chant the spell, Jyumon tonaete

What's this magnificent, yet naughty, sight? a bold pose, I'm going to nail it daitan pozu kimete mimasu

What's this magnificent, yet naughty, sight?

Let's go, close your eyes, take a deep breath Iku yo me wo tojite shinkokyuu shite

Suuu~! Let's go, close your eyes, take a deep breath Iku yo me wo tojite shinkokyuu shite

Suuu~!

Ninja Technique: Art of the Doppelganger Ninpo bunshin no jutsu

One, two, three, four! One, two, three, four! Ichi ni san shi

Oh my, that's weird Arya-rya-rya hen ne

Big time, big time, Buchake buchake

Lots of mishaps Shippai ippai

Watch this, this time it's ninja stars Mitete kondo wa shuriken

One, two, three, four! One, two, three, four! Ichi ni san shi

Hopefully this will work Nantoka naare

Ei-ya, Ei-ya! Ei-ya, Ei-ya!

It's sink or swim Ichikabachika de

Watch this, my power's at it's max Mitete pawaa wa zenkai

I'll be stronger tomorrow, Shinobu Asu wa motto tsuyoku narimasu Shinobu

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! I'll be stronger tomorrow, Shinobu Asu wa motto tsuyoku narimasu Shinobu

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

I'm a ninja Ninja desu

This story is about the super handsome boy, Onsokumaru...

...and the beautiful women that surround him.

It's an anime filled with love, lust, and unexpected nudity...

Ninja Trainee Shinobu!

Ninja Trainee Shinobu Ninja Trainee Shinobu!

Ninja Trainee Shinobu

It's a meow-meow!

This is bad.

Final exams are tomorrow and I can't focus at all.

I wonder what that was.

I think it's around here...

I guess I'll start searching around this area first.

Art of Invisibility Technique!

Let's start with this house.

Let's go! Yeah!

Looks like she has no idea I'm here.

Plop!

Oh right, this isn't what I came here for!

Hey, you...

You!

Did you just say something?

Over here.

Y-You can see me?

I can see you. I can see you.

No way!

M-My technique didn't work on her?

No! I'm so shocked!

This is embarrassing!

That's strange...

Head Master told me I would be invisible.

I swear! Please believe me.

And, who are you?

Oh! I'm Shinobu!

I'm a ninja trainee who goes to a ninja school.

Pleased to meet you!

N-Ninja?

Yes, a ninja! You know?

"Nin-Nin!"

Just kidding!

And what is a ninja doing here?

How dare you barge into my room!?

Well, I'm in the middle of an exam, so...

Exam?

From Ninja Department, Female Ninja Studies, Shinobu. At your call!

So you came, Shinobu.

Yes, I am here.

I will now tell you your exam questions.

Yes, Head Master!

Choose one of the following exam criteria.

Number one: Abolish taxes.

Number two: Collect 10,000 yen in fines from every couple in the city.

Number three: Pinch a Martian and make it cry.

Number four: Cross the Pacific Ocean on a rubber duck raft.

They're all impossible! Number four: Cross the Pacific Ocean on a rubber duck raft.

They're all impossible! Number five: Stuff peanuts up your nose and shoot them 100 meters.

Number five: Stuff peanuts up your nose and shoot them 100 meters.

Number six: Thumb wrestle a wild bear.

Number nine-hundred and ninety-nine: Let it keep on-a-flowin'.

Number one-thousand: Hold a bat between your legs and hit a home run.

Now, which one do you choose?

Umm... Out of the ones I can do today...

Then, I'd like to go with number four-hundred and twelve, please.

Number four-hundred and twelve.

I see. Wasn't expecting that one...

I honestly don't want to do that either, but...

Okay!

Off you go, now!

Yes!

I, Shinobu, am off to accomplish my mission!

And that's how it went.

So what's number four-hundred and twelve?

Tadaa!

Collect underwear from high school girls!

Collect underwear from high school girls?

They're located at these spots marked in red.

H-Hey! My house is marked, too!

Oh! Really?!

Are you Kaede from the Shiranui household?

Well, yeah, but...

H-Hold on! You've got to be kidding!

Kaede...

To a ninja, Head Master's orders are absolute.

If Head Master says he has a cat-girl maid, he has one.

If Head Master says he has an adorable younger sister...

...not related by blood, he does!

What kind of bizarre way of thinking is that!?

With that said,

I will accomplish my mission, no matter what!

Art of the Doppelganger Technique!

Sorry!

I am still a trainee...

I think this is more effective, anyway.

Um...

Then, I'll use my ninja stars next...

I'm so sorry!

I got this cute ninja star pouch.

But I didn't want to get holes in it or have it smell like iron,

so I stopped using them.

I just said I was going to use them, but...

...| deeply apologize for taking it back.

I really don't care.

But look!

Instead, I have a discount coupon to a karaoke place!

Wait, it expires today.

What do you want to do?

What am I supposed to do?

Anyhow...

Are you really a ninja?

You're terrible, Kaede!

I studied about ninja from period shows and manga...

On your knees! On your knees!

I'm doing my best!

I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

You're doing great, Shinobu!

Really?

Pr-Probably...

I feel like I might give up!

I'm in trouble!

I'll have to call for some help!

Onsokumaru!

Gabora!

W-What is that thing?

It's my partner, Onsokumaru.

Isn't he ridiculously cute?

No, that's not what I meant.

What kind of animal is that?

Stop joking, Kaede.

It's a hawk! A hawk! Isn't it obvious?

I'm surprised you didn't know that!

Illustrated Bird Species

A hawk.

Hawk

Onsokumaru!

Head Master kept referring to you as a hawk!

What are you then?

Silly girl. Of course I'm a hawk.

I knew it!

I was suspicious for ten seconds. I'm sorry!

No need to apologize. It's okay.

It's talking, too!

By the way, Shinobu!

Head Master is angry that you're not back yet.

He said he'll be waiting for you,

imagining you naked!

Does that mean something terrible is going to happen...

...to the imaginary me, if I don't get back soon?

Nobody will want to marry me then!

In that case, I'm going to take them by force!

Hey!

No! No! No!

Pilder on! No! No! No!

Pilder on!

You thief! Low-life! Pervert! Ero-ninja!

Am I perverted?

Am I ero?

Am I Emmanuel?

No, I mean... I might have said too much.

Yeah, you're a ero-woman!

You ride in an ero-car, drink ero-water and pet ero-dogs!

You're ero-ero-mucho-mucho-mucho...

Mucho-cho!

No, I'm not!

Mucho! No, I'm not!

Mucho!

But... stealing underwear is a perverse and bad thing to do.

Plus, Kaede doesn't really like it either...

I want to become a ninja of justice.

I can't do this!

I give up on this exam...

I'm sure I won't miss one pair of underwear, so you can have it.

I know how difficult exams can be.

Here.

Thank you so much!

I'm forever in your debt!

As for my exam, it was terrible.

I didn't get to study at all that night.

Math 1

I'm going to cram tonight!

Art of Invisibility Technique...

Yeah!

You're...

You can still see me? Silly me...

Actually, for tonight's exam,

I have to get a hicky from a high-school girl.

Oh my...

The Head Master Appears!

The Mead Master Appears The Head Master Appears!

The Mead Master Appears

See you!

Bye bye! See you!

Bye bye!

Bye bye! Have a good night.

Have a good night.

How are you doing, Kaede?

I made a cool entrance,

but I'm scared this branch might snap.

Please hold on...

No!

No!

Phew! A successful landing!

You just witnessed my graceful escape trick!

Yay! Clap, clap, clap!

By the way, thank you for the other day!

I passed the exam with flying colors,

and your underwear got me a high score!

Oh... Good for you.

Yes! Thank you so much!

A meow-meow!

As a thank you,

I've come to invite you to the Valley of the Ninjas!

No, you don't have to do that...

Come on! There's no need to be shy!

The wheels of fate have already started turning!

We may end up changing the history of the future if we don't hurry!

Hold on tight!

If you let go,

I'm one-hundred percent certain you'll die.

We're finally here.

That was such a rough trip.

I... I thought I was going to die.

But, come on!

"You can't buy great memories," right?

What was so great about that!?

Kaede is really angry!

Is there any way to calm her down?

Oh, that's right!

Ninja Technique Story!

"Man... my wife and I had a fight last night."

"She was throwing plates at me. It was rough!"

"But I fought back!"

"Really? What did you do?"

"I planted a kiss..."

What the...! Stop it! "I planted a kiss..."

What the...! Stop it!

That's strange.

I saw on TV that you could make up with someone that way.

That's for a fight between a husband and wife!

Also, adding "Ninja Technique" before everything doesn't make it work!

Your ninja technique didn't work?

Onsokumaru!

Shinobu, that's because you have yet to master the techniques!

Come! Let us train together now!

I'm sorry, Onsokumaru.

I've invited Kaede over,

so I can't do anything with you today.

How dare you coldly brush me off with such passionate eyes!

Unforgivable!

A ninja will find the opponent's weakness in an instant...

...and strike!

Go if you must, but only over my dead body, Shinobu!

Here goes nothing!

Defeated by the first blow!

U... Unfortunately... Th... This isn't m-my weakness...

My weakness is to be squished between your breasts!

As expected, Onsokumaru.

As an enemy, no one strikes me with more fear than you.

Now, it's my turn!

I'll show you a flip book of someone shitting in reverse!

That's gross! I give up!

Look! Look! See how it's sucking it back in! That's gross! I give up!

Look! Look! See how it's sucking it back in!

I'm sorry, Kaede...

I invited you over, but now I've failed you...

I'm such a no-good-ninja.

Don't worry about it!

I guess I'll go home now.

This is the entrance to the Ninja Manor.

I don't care. I'm going home.

Please don't move!

If anyone acts suspicious...

...in front of the Ninja Manor where the Head Master lives...

...death immediately awaits them!

Please stay still and don't move!

Okay.

J Head Master! Let's play! It's Shinobu! J

J Who's there? J

Oh, it's Shinobu!

Yay! Yay!

Mr. Gatekeeper, is Head Master here?

He is.

Is that your friend?

Yup!

Guys! Hurry up and slip through the gate...

...while I still have the strength to hold it!

Okay!

This house is amazing.

It really looks like a ninja house!

Head Master!

Doesn't seem like he's here.

Head Master?

Fools! The Head Master is dead!

And you will die here as well!

Hello, Head Master!

Would it have been better if I acted like I was surprised?

Well, either way is fine.

Oh, good.

What's with this conversation?

I'll be there in a sec.

A rainbow? How'd that get here?

Yahoo!

I'm making my adorable entrance sliding down a rainbow...

...like an angel up to mischief descending from the Heavens!

That's right!

I am...!

I am...!

I am the Head Master!

Here, would everyone like some tea?

You aimed for it! You aimed for it, didn't you?

Tell me the truth or I'll kill you!

No, no... Of course not.

It was pure coincidence.

I'm losing my strength...

Hang in there, family jewels!

The one with the beard is Head Master. Hang in there, family jewels!

The one with the beard is Head Master.

But isn't that... Onsokumaru?

He's Onsokumaru! No matter how I look at him.

N-No! I have no idea who you are.

Plus, I'm not Onsokumaru.

See? I don't look like him at all!

I'll commend you for your effort, but it's so obvious.

Oh, come on Kaede!

Onsokumaru doesn't have a beard!

Tell her Shinobu! She's so stupid!

Fine! Then, call Onsokumaru here right now.

No problem!

Hold it right there, ladies!

Go on! Shinobu, call Onsokumaru!

No problem!

Y-You mustn't call him, Shinobu!

He's in the middle of training a special technique that turns piss into beer!

If you call him, the witch's curse will make your television explode!

I'm telling you the truth!

That would be bad!

My TV has a VCR inside. I'd be heartbroken!

I'm sorry, I can't call Onsokumarul!

Please forgive me!

Now, now. Cut it out, little missy.

Ow. Ow!

Anyway! What is a girl like you doing here?

This is a secret training location only ninjas know!

He's right!

Outsiders who discover our secret...

...aren't allowed to leave alive. That's the law!

Then what about me?

Oh... Now that you mention it, you're definitely an outsider.

I totally forgot. Scratch, scratch.

J-Just hold on a minute, here!

I didn't realize it at first because you were acting so bold!

Shinobu! Do it!

Finally, the time has come to use...

...the forbidden Ninja Technique Memory Blast.

Time out! Time out!

Just kidding. It's a joke. A joke!

Of course we wouldn't do it.

Really? It's only the first episode. I don't want to die.

No fair! No fair!

The guilty one will be tied up with a rope and get dragged around by a jeep!

Or... M-m-m-marry me!

No!

Oh no! Now is the time to use it!

Ninja Technique Memory Blast!

Beep beep, beep beep!

Vroooom!

Vroooom! Beep beep! Beep beep!

Vroom-vroom? Vroom-vroom?

Yup, that's a vicoom-vroom.

I guess you blasted away more than just his memory.

What's this screw from?

I just found ten yen!

We better hurry and find what Head Master lost.

At this rate, I doubt Shinobu's doing any real training.

You have scars on your arm.

Are you okay?

Oh, this? It's a scar from my training.

It's nothing. I have scars like this...

...all over my body!

You didn't need to get naked!

To be a full-fledged ninja, this is nothing!

Hey! Hey!

I guess she's actually working hard.

I'm going to take Kaede home!

This again?!

Bye-bye!

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Hurry up!

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Gather around! Shugou

Made it in the nick of time, I slid in Giri giri seefu suberikonde

I jumped over the tough morning Kibishii asa wo tobikoeta

"What you said yesterday..." Kinou no hanashi

"...might have been a little white lie, " you said chotto duke uso kamo nante

I definitely have a long way to go with my training, Yappari shugyou busoku

Let's do it! Ganbarou

Turn turn turn, one day I'll become great Kuru kuru ri, rippa ni naru hi ga

Turn turn turn, turn turn turn Kuru kuru rii, kuru kuru rin

It's okay Daijoubu

"With prayer, flowers bloom," someone said Nenzureba Hana hiraku nante

It's an unreliable philosophy Tayori nai hitori goto

But I've got to try! Demo ganbaranakucha

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Hurry up!

Shuu tata shuu tata!

Break it up! Kaisan

Hurry up!

We met thanks to a weird exam question.

What other questions were there?

Let's see... Confess your love under a legendary tree...

On the forehead of Kinoshita's dog, you must...

Oh, forget it! That's enough!

All in all, it's thanks to Head Master, I mean Onsokumaru, I guess...

Next episode of 2x2=Shinobuden!

“Ninjas Elated over Cherry Blossom Viewing" and...

..."Shinobu goes on a Date with Kaede".

Onsokumaru is Head Master?

Ninjas Elated over Chevry Blossom Viewing Shinobu goes on a Date with kaede Onsokumaru is Head Master?

Ninjas élafed ouar Chew-y Blossom Viewing Shinobu goas on a Data wifh kaoda Kaede, you like to say things that make no sense!

Ninjas Elated over Chevry Blossom Viewing Shinobu goes on a Date with kaede No way, you mean you...

Ninjas Elated over Chevry Blossom Viewing Shinobu goes on a Date with kaede