All language subtitles for The Trouble With Maggie Cole - 01x01 - Episode 1.ORGANIC.English.updated.Addic7ed.com

Thurlbury Historic Keep.

Speaking, yes.

Sorry?

Say again?

_

Sorry to bother you, Headmaster.

Mrs Hall sent Tommy Jarvis over to see you.

Why?
What's he done?

He's... Well...

Really?

Really?

Oh, sorry.
Two minutes.

Go on.

- Hello?
- Guess what.

Oh, they haven't done something already?

- Who?
- 3C. Aren't they there on a field trip today?

I'd forgotten all about that.
No, they're not even here yet.

But... guess what.

I'm going to be on the radio!

Oh, right.

"Oh, right"?

I'm sorry.
Oh, good.

It's Coastland FM.

They're doing a little segment
about Thurlbury,

you know, for the anniversary.

And, of course, they wanted
some input from a local historian.

- Sorry, a local what?
- Historian.

So, a reporter is taking me out for lunch...

today!

Peter?
Are you still there?

Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, no, it's great, great.

Meanwhile, I've just had a nine-year-old

turn up at double maths
with a dead magpie in his bag.

So, it's quite the morning for both of us.

Are you serious?
That's horrible!

- What was he gonna do with that?
- How should I know?

He's either a budding ornithologist
or a potential serial killer.

I'm veering towards the latter.

It wasn't Betty Jarvis' youngest, was it?

- I couldn't possibly say.
- Of course not, no.

No, I wouldn't expect you to.

One knock for yes, two knocks for no.

I thought as much.

You know that she married
her fourth cousin, don't you?

- Can I go now?
- Yes, yes, yes, of course, yes.

Get on.
Oh, and I don't forget that

Jamie and Becka
are coming for dinner tonight.

So I'm going to need you
to subtly slip the topic

of babies into the conversation
at some point.

What?
Well, why is that my job?

Well, because it's less obvious
coming from you, that's all.

Oh, I think 3C have turned up.
Yes.

All right, so I'll speak to you later.
OK, bye.

All right, Dr Lecter, let's go.

Jill!
Oh!

All right, 3C... listening.

OK, guys, listen up.
Thank you.

You all know Mrs Cole.
She helped out at the harvest festival.

And she's married
to our very own headmaster.

So you know what that means, don't you?
Best behaviour.

So, who would like to tell her

what we've been learning about
these last few weeks?

- Emma?
- Cheese.

Not cheese, no.
Josh?

- Medieval Britain, miss.
- Very good!

And this place where we're standing now

is the actual site of an actual Norman fort.

- Keep.
- Keep.

Which Mrs Cole helps to maintain.

Well, I don't really help, as such.

I'm actually the sole curator, to be fair.

So I'm the keeper of the keep.

I'm the keep keeper.
I keep the keep.

Tough crowd.

Oh, tell me about it.

OK, then, worksheets out.
Everybody, get into their pairs.

- Coffee?
- Oh, sweet Jesus, yes.

A nice cuppa en route.

So... a big radio star, eh?

This could be the start
of a whole new career.

I don't know about all that.
It's just a little piece, really.

They probably won't even use it.
It's just nice to be asked, isn't it?

- I don't want to make a big thing of it.
- No, of course not.

It's a weird job, isn't it?

Teaching assistant.

Of course, they never had them
in my day.

- How's she working out?
- What, Roxanna?

Oh, yeah, she's great.
The kids love her.

Hey, you know who she's
going out with, don't you?

- Alex Myer, from the Coastguard.
- Oh, yeah.

Of course, he was at the school
back when I was working there.

He was a proper little troublemaker.

- The younger brother was even worse.
- Yeah, well,

at the end of the day, he's handsome,
has a steady job and he's about her age.

What more can you ask for in Thurlbury?

Slim pickings out there,
as I know only too well.

Well...
I'll tell you what, Jill,

I happen to know one place
where you could meet somebody.

Do tell.

It's only the social event of the season.

The big planning meet.

It's gonna be awash with handsome,
eligible bachelors, is it?

It might be.
You are coming, aren't you?

- Yeah, course I am.
- Good.

Because I need you
to propose the idea of a float.

Well, it would be awkward
if I did it, wouldn't it?

I've arranged the meeting.

I don't want people to think
I'm trying to organise everything.

You are trying to organise everything.

Yeah, but I don't want people to think it.

Chockie biccy?

- Are you trying to bribe me?
- Absolutely.

It's cash for questions,
but with added calories.

Well, as you know, Maggie, I am nothing...

nothing, if not easily corruptible.
So, er...

chuck in a custard cream
and I think we might have a deal.

OK.

Looking good!

No, no, no, I'll get it in before five.

And I'm editing it myself.

Yes, I am.
Look, I drew the short straw here.

I'm editing it, or else it'll
wind up being even duller

than it's already gonna be.

I mean, have you ever actually been
to this place?

It's like 2004 here or something.

They probably still sacrifice virgins.

Oh, hang on, it looks like
the chief druid just arrived.

I'll call you back.

- Maggie Cole?
- Yes, that is me.

I am indeed she.

Jez. Good to meet you.
Thanks for doing this.

Yeah, no, of course.
It's my pleasure. Absolutely.

Great.
Right, then, a drink?

You look like a G&T girl to me.

Do I?
Well, I have been known to have the odd...

But it's a little bit early for me.

Maggie, come on, it's always
five o'clock somewhere, right?

Oh, gosh, it's so media, isn't it?

- It's very Mad Men.
- Yeah!

- I've never seen that show, actually.
- You should, it's good.

- A mate of mine worked on that.
- Did he? Right.

Oh, go on, then.
Yes, all right.

Yeah, I'll have one little one.
Yeah.

Just tiny, you know?
A child's portion.

If children drank alcohol, which they don't.
So that's just silly.

Sorry.

Same for me, mate.
And a double G&T.

...it was part of
a Norman settlement for centuries,

but both its name
and its recognition as a village

didn't truly come about until 1520.

So, I like to think of the anniversary

as a celebration of all of that history,

not just the last 500 years.

Yes. Good.
That's all great, Maggie, thank you.

Well, it's history.
It's what we're made of.

Of course, we want this piece
to be as much about Thurlbury now

as Thurlbury then.

- Right.
- Modern village living, you know?

Most townies probably think close-knit
communities like this are all just...

I don't know, tombolas and cricket matches.

I reckon you could set them straight
there, though, Maggie.

Too right, I could!

Although, to be fair, we have got
a very good cricket team,

because they came fourth
in the county last year.

Which is a surprise, considering
half of them are on the bottle.

But you didn't hear that from me.

No.
No, of course not.

Do you know...

when I took this assignment,
some of my colleagues tried to insist

that nothing interesting happens
in Thurlbury.

Who said that?

It wasn't Moxy In The Morning, was it?
Cos I really like him.

I mean, who doesn't?
The man's a national treasure.

Yeah. No, it was just some of the kids
in the office.

Millennials, eh?
What do they know?

I bet you could name me a dozen
people round here

living out lives ten times
more interesting than theirs.

In fact, perhaps you could
point me in their direction.

You know, some quirky anecdotes
from a few colourful characters

could really round this segment off.

A chance to show some of these city dwellers
they're not the only ones having fun.

Am I right?

I mean, I don't want to give the
impression that I know everybody.

No.

But, yeah, I think I could
point you in the direction

of some people worth talking to, yeah.
Yeah.

Great.
Well, you hold that thought, Maggie,

and I'll grab us a couple more drinks.

Yeah.
No, no. Actually no, no.

- Cos I've honestly had enough.
- No, don't worry about it.

- It all goes on expenses.
- Does it?

If I don't use it, I lose it.

Oh, go on, then.
One more, yeah.

Attagirl.

Just one.
Double.

Sync and corrections: minouhse
www.addic7ed.com

I cannot believe you got sloshed
in the middle of the afternoon.

I did not get sloshed!

I just thought I might be
mildly over the limit, that's all.

Anyway, it's only five minutes
from the school to the pub.

Yeah, but five minutes, for me,
that's practically a full cardio.

Anyway, I hope you haven't wasted
your whole day

telling people that your wifelet's
going to be on the radio.

I haven't, no.
Oh, haven't you?

Well, you can.
Not brag, obviously, but...

- Look who it is!
- What?

Pull over!
Pull over!

It's Buster.

I don't believe
we've been formally introduced.

It's Buster.
It's Marcus Ormansby's dog.

- It must mean he's back.
- Oh, for...

- Now what are you doing?
- Nothing!

I'll just...

Becka and Jamie are coming
for dinner, we need wine.

No, we don't. We've got three
unopened bottles in the...

I won't be long.

Just wait there.

Hello!

- All right, sir?
- Yes.

Thank you, Liam.

Good.
Good to see you.

You great, witless, walking ASBO.

Afternoon, Emil.
How's things?

I couldn't beg a favour, could I?

You wouldn't stick this up
in your window for me, would you?

It's advertising that meeting
we're going to have

about the anniversary celebrations.

We're gonna have a float.

Do you have floats at all in Poland?

Anyway, we need as many people
as we can to attend, so...

- OK, I'll stick it up.
- Great.

I'll do it now, then, shall I?

Fabulous!
Thank you!

Hello, stranger!

It's Maggie.

Maggie Cole.
We met last year.

Oh, right, yes.
Of course, Maggie.

So, you're back
at Riverside Cottage again, then,

- working on your latest masterpiece?
- Trying to, yeah.

Oh, did you arrive today?

No.
No, about four nights ago.

You must've rattled out
five chapters by now, then.

Well, I've made a start, anyway.

Yes, we always make sure that your books

are prominently displayed here.

Yes, I have noticed that.

Technically, I'm not really
a local author, though, so...

You write them all here, don't you?

- Well, yes.
- Well, there you go, then.

You are an honorary Thurlbrian.

Sorry, a what?

You know,
I wish I'd known that you were here

because I've just done an interview
for local radio.

It's a silly little piece about the village.
You know, it's nothing of your sort of level.

They'll probably use it as filler.
But I could've plugged your book.

Oh, well.
Maybe next time.

Oh, no, there probably
won't be a next time.

Although Jez did say that I was a natural.

Right.

I suppose I'd better get back to
stockpiling the old provisions, then.

I'm sure I'll see you around.

Yeah, absolutely.
Because I'm everywhere!

Yes.

Oh, no, not there, Emil.

It would be much better on the door
here, wouldn't it?

More people would see it then.

No, put it here.

There, there.

That's it.

Well?

- What?
- Wine...

Oh, we've got loads of that at home.
Just go home.

Go on, go on, drive home.
That's it.

- I'll see you tomorrow, then, yeah?
- Yeah.

- Night, Alex.
- Night-night.

Down, boy!

What are you doing here?

Oh, just gave Syd a ride home, didn't I?

I saw you two getting stuck in.

I thought I'd bag myself a ringside seat.

- Who said I'm giving you a lift?
- This was my car once, you know.

- No, it wasn't, it was Dad's.
- All right.

Come on, then.
Mum's probably got tea on.

Bye, Roxy!

Bye!
I love you!

- Good night!
- Grow up, grow up!

He crosses the line!
He's the Formula 1 champion of the world!

Josh Roberts!

See?
This is how Lewis Hamilton started.

People are gonna ask questions.

So, we say we got it on finance.

Or I sold a kidney.

Stop worrying, it's just a car.

Have a look inside.

Do you like the colour at least?

Yes, Neil, I like the colour.

It's my favourite, you know it is.

So, how's about it, kidder?
You want to go for a quick spin?

No, it's a school night!

Please, Mum!

- Please, Mum...
- All right, all right.

Once around the green and then bed, OK?

All right, passenger seat, mate.
I'm driving.

OK, seat belt on.

I just...
Basically, I just...

I was happy to help.

They probably won't use very much
of it at all.

They just wanted
insights from a local historian.

- A local what?
- Historian.

What did you actually talk about, then, Mum?

- She can't remember, she was sloshed.
- I was not sloshed!

It was mostly about Thurlbury.
You know...

Jez did say that it was great.

They could fill a whole hour with it.
I couldn't believe it.

They were probably joking, Mum.
They tend to edit that stuff down.

- I did a little thing for local radio once.
- Oh?

You did?
Yeah.

- It wasn't here, it was when I was up at uni.
- I don't remember.

Oh, no, it wasn't one of the awful
boxing things, was it?

- Boxing thing?
- Yeah.

Jamie used to box.

- You used to box?
- Yes.

Absolutely awful.
I used to worry myself sick about it.

Sorry, sorry, no.
I can't quite... You?

You used to box?

You once woke me up to get rid of a spider.

It was big.

By the way, Mum, did we tell you we
think we might've found a shop space

- for Becka's business up in Trellcombe?
- Oh, that'll be good!

You'll be able to sell loads of your little
trinkets up there. They've got pots of money.

Bespoke jewellery, Maggie, not trinkets.

That's what...
That's what I meant.

It'll be good not to have to
work from home any more, won't it?

Because that'll free up your
second bedroom. That'll be good.

Yeah.

You'll have to find something...
maybe something else to do with that.

Are you two thinking
of starting a family soon?

Honestly!
Sorry, he's so insensitive.

I'm so sorry.

It is a fair question, though, isn't it?

I mean, you have been married
for three years now.

And, hello!
Custom-made baby-sitting service here,

getting older by the day.

Yeah, well, you know, we've...

We've talked about it.

- But it's...
- Maggie, you may rest assured

that if and when we decide to start a family,

you will definitely be the third to know.

Well, good.
That's good.

Bronze.

That's...
That's great. Good.

Right...

Bye.

I said bring it up subtly!

That was subtle.
Non-subtle would've been,

"Your mum wants to know
when we're getting grandkids."

That practically is what you said.

I love you.

You're such an idiot!

And I love you, too.

- I love you.
- And you.

Of course, it's Friday night.

Off on another one of his
"business weekends".

The actual air quotes were unnecessary.

- I would've got it from the tone.
- Poor Carol.

She knows, you know.
I know she knows.

And she just lets it happen.

We should invite her over
for supper sometime.

No, we shouldn't.

She's our GP.

I mean, she's seen my bits and bobs.

And I'm not having supper with
someone who's seen my bits and bobs.

- Right. Are we sorted?
- We are.

- Good night, Headmaster.
- Night-night, you.

Hey, are you excited about the interview?

Tremendously, yes.
Can we have the light out now?

We need to start
getting the word out about it.

Oh, God, you're not gonna make
a big thing about this, are you?

I'm not doing this for me, Peter.

This is all about Thurlbury

and promoting the anniversary celebrations.

We want everyone in the village listening.

I'll put it on the social medias.

You're not on the social medias.

I'll use the school's or Jamie's.

Neither of those are yours.
And why do you have the passwords?

Look, I mean, can you not do this tomorrow?

Maybe think about it before you do.

It'll probably only be
a short little clip they use.

I just don't want you to be
disappointed, that's all.

Plus, you'd like to go to sleep.

Plus, I'd like to go to sleep.

- Well, obviously, I can see that.
- Oh, right.

Oh, come on...
Why is it...

Oh, double tap.

Oh, double tap, I see.

It's supposed to...

There you go!

There I go what?
Who's this?

Well, I don't know.
But keep swiping like this.

Right, and then you put a blue tick
in this box here if you like anyone.

- Swipe it, like this.
- Yeah, I know how to swipe, Maggie.

I just don't know what I'm swiping for,

- because this looks suspiciously like a...
- A dating app!

Yes, it is!

I've signed you up for one.

Well, Jamie did, cos I don't
really know how to do it.

Well, you were saying the other day
that you didn't get to meet anybody.

Yes, I was. But that doesn't mean
that I'm so desperate

that I want to go on some...

- Hello, he's nice, isn't he?
- No, no, you don't want that one.

- He works on the rigs, he'll be away.
- Well, hey!

- What... How do you know?
- Because I've checked them all out earlier.

What?
I've got a vested interest in this.

I mean, anyone that you pick

is potentially gonna become
a best friend-in-law, aren't they?

Talking of which, here's yours.

Oh, yeah, well, he's also my boss,

so don't mention I'm spending
my lunch break down at the pub,

even if you did kidnap me.

Lips are sealed.

Thurlbury Historic Keep.
Oh, sorry, love. Sorry, I mean, hi.

Maggie, would you like to tell me

why I've just received an invitation
to a barbecue party

that's being held at my own house?

Oh, sorry about that.

I just copied in everyone
in my address book.

- No, he's got a big beard.
- No, no.

- So, we're having a barbecue?
- Yeah, for the broadcast.

I'm sure I mentioned it.

No. No, you didn't.

I'm sure I did.

Hang on, sorry.

Oh, sorry.
Just this email, the barbecue.

Do I need to RSVP to Mrs Cole,
or can I just tell you that I'm coming?

No.
I'll pass your acceptance on.

Thank you.
Thank you, sorry.

Maggie...

- Exactly how many people have you invited?
- Not many.

Now, then...
Yes, please.

You are allowed to help, you know.

Oh, I am helping.
I'm on doorbell duty.

There, see?
Once more, my services...

are required.

Dinner, here, two weeks in a row.

I deserve a medal of honour for this.

- Oh, hello.
- Hi, Dad.

Oh, dear, couldn't come up with
an excuse fast enough, then?

No, we did.
It didn't take.

Right, better go on down there.

Abandon hope all ye, et cetera, et cetera.

Perfect timing.

- There we are.
- See you in a minute.

Fun.

That's good.

Glad you came, that's good.
Lovely to see you.

Hello.

Ah, hi, Karen.

Maggie.

So, you've never actually been here
before, have you?

No.

Oh, it's very nice.

Oh, well, thank you very much.
Yes, it suits us.

I mean, it's a lovely view of the estuary.

And Mr Cole obviously takes
great care of the garden.

Peter?

I mean, no, you must be joking.

No. All of this is my doing.

No, he would over-water a cactus, that one.

No, cactuses don't need watering.

- Cacti.
- Sorry?

No, of course they don't. It's just a...
It's just a silly joke, that's all.

What was?

Nothing.
Will you excuse me, Karen? Thanks.

- Carol, so glad you could make it.
- Oh, not at all.

Thanks for having me.
Spared me having to cook.

Oh, of course.
Alan's away again, isn't he?

Nothing worse than cooking for one.

- Sorry.
- Oh, none taken.

- So, did he get to speak to you last week?
- Who, Alan?

No, Jez.
Are you gonna be on, too?

I don't know what you're talking about, Maggie.
I'm sorry.

Didn't he drop by the surgery last week?

Jez, the reporter.
I told him to come and see you.

You did?
Why?

Well, because he asked me to suggest
some notable residents.

- Did he speak to you?
- Oh, am I a notable resident?

Of course you are!
Headmaster-in-waiting.

I mean mistress.
I mean headmistress, sorry.

- Well, whatever I am, no, he didn't.
- Oh, that's strange.

Maybe he ran out of time.
Talking of which...

I'll be on in a minute.
It's like a premier, isn't it?

I feel like I should make a speech
or something.

And if she tries, wrestle her to the ground.

Or box her.

You know she's gonna ask.

Don't touch that dial!

You'll only get in trouble with Maggie.

- I'm not afraid of her.
- Of course you're not, Dad.

Do you need a hand, Headmaster?

Oh, hello, Karen.

You really don't need to
call me Headmaster outside of work.

Actually, you don't need
to call me in work, either.

Oh, I really think I should.
In work, I mean.

That's your prerogative.
But outside of work, Peter is fine.

Well, do you need a hand...
Peter?

Right, can I just...

Just take that, thank you.

Everyone!
The Thurlbury piece should be on after this.

So if you'd like to move over this
way, you'll be able to hear better.

'Across the county
and on digital nationwide, '

'this is Coastland FM.'

Oh, I'm nervous!

- I absolutely hate the sound of my own voice.
- Since when?

- 'The time now is just coming up to 1:30.'
- 'In a moment, we'll get...'

Actually, while we're waiting,
can I just remind everyone

that there's a meeting
tomorrow night about...

'..with Jeremy Crosby.'
Shut up!

Shut up, it's on!

'Village life...'

'The very term itself
conjures up images of summer fetes, '

'cucumber sandwiches and tea on the lawn.'

'But does such an idealistic,
chocolate box vision...'

That's him, that's Jez.
'...still hold true today?'

'Or is the great British village
an altogether different beast?'

'I recently visited'

'the historic former medieval
settlement of Thurlbury to find out.'

'It was here I spoke to local resident'

- 'and amateur historian Maggie Cole...'
- Amateur?

'..And asked her what it was like
living in, what must presumably be,

'quite a close-knit community.'

'Oh, it's wonderful, it's just wonderful.'

'I'm actually fourth generation
Thurlbury myself, born and bred.'

'There's literally nowhere else in
the world that I would rather be.'

'I wondered whether there was any
truth to the wider public perception'

'of communal village living.'

'Is it all curtain twitching
and gossiping over garden fences?'

'Oh, well, I don't know about that.'

'But it's certainly true
that everybody knows everybody else, '

'or at least knows someone who does.'

'You can't keep a secret here.'

Er, that's from two bits of the interview.

Gosh, it's fascinating, isn't it,
how they put it together?

I'm trying to listen.

'Obviously, I'm not really one
for gossip, but...'

'some of what goes on round here
would put the soaps to shame.'

- And that's from a different part, too.
- 'And with that, she began to regale me'

'with various tales
from the Thurlbury rumour mill.'

I did what?

'Oh, yeah, you wouldn't
think it to look at them.'

'Not at all. I mean, they seem like
the perfect couple.'

'They've been married 15 years '

'and she's been the village GP here for ten.'

'He spends most weekends in Exeter, '

'supposedly on business.'

'But a friend of mine saw him there
once and he was...'

'Well, let's just say
in the arms of someone else.'

'A male someone else.'

No, no, that was just...
We were just talking then.

They weren't supposed to be...

'Yes, of course we're multicultural here.'

'Of course we are!'

'We've got a lovely Polish family, actually.'

'They've been here ten years.'
'They'd do absolutely anything for you.'

'They're the heart and soul
of this community.'

'Mind, between you and me,
the daughter's a bit of a one.'

'Nice enough girl, very pretty,
but she certainly knows it.'

'I mean, obviously, I'm not saying
she has a reputation as such, just...'

'Well, from what I've heard,
you could count on one hand'

'the number of boys
she hasn't been carrying on with.'

'...stays for a couple
of months every summer, '

'writes all his novels here.'

'Claims it's for the tranquillity,
'but, you know, if you ask me, it's...'

'Well, let's be polite and say research, '

'rather than laziness or cheating.'

'You see, he doesn't actually
make any of his characters up, '

'like proper writers do.'

'He just secretly bases them
on people round here.'

'Loads of us have spotted ourselves
in them.'

- What?
- 'Loads of us.'

Oh, my God...

'Well, you have to wonder, don't you?'

'I mean, arrive out of nowhere
four years ago, no family.'

'Suddenly owns the village pub.'

'He's from London.'

'The East End.'

'Never talks about himself,
of course, but...'

'I've heard things.'

'Gangland things.'

'Take it from me, we're talking
witness protection here.'

'I mean, you only have to
look at him, to be honest.'

'I know one family around here'

'with a bit more going on
than meets the eye.'

'They're a very friendly couple.'

'I've known them since they were kids,
to be honest.'

'She's a hairdresser at the local salon.'

- 'Husband works at the boatyard.'
- Dad, for God's sake, just turn it off.

Don't.

Don't you dare.

'It's not like either of them make much
and then, '

'suddenly, a brand-new car, flashy clothes.'

'The pair of them have started
acting, well, you know, differently.'

'I'd read there'd been a jackpot
winner somewhere in the county.'

'I don't know why they're
trying to hide it, though.'

'They're probably worried about
begging letters or something like that.'

- Maggie, what is this?
- I...

'Yes, yes, my husband's
the headmaster there, you see.'

Maggie...

'Actually, he's retiring next year.'

'It's never gonna be the same without him.'

'I mean, the woman who's taking over, she's...'
'Well, don't get me wrong or anything, '

'she's actually my best friend,
as it goes, but...'

'Oh, you know, maybe not
the sharpest tool in the box, '

'to put it mildly.'

'I mean, how she thinks
she could ever take...'

Everyone, you have to believe me,
I don't understand what's just...

No, you don't!

You don't understand anything.

Carol...

No. No, no.
Leave it. Just...

Everyone, I think it might be best

if we called a halt to the proceedings.

Yeah, I think we should probably go, too.

Are you joking?
For once, I'm actually up for staying.

Becks, please...

I'm sorry.

Jill...
Oh, Jill. Listen...

All of that
just was completely out of context.

All right. All right, well,
I'll tell you what, Maggie.

Why don't you tell me what the context

for you telling an entire county

what an apparently useless, thick
moron I am would be?

Jill...
Let's not do this now.

No.
No, you're right.

I tell you what, Maggie...
Let's not do this ever.

Oh, God.

- Are you all right?
- Well...

I managed to save some of it.

But there's only so much room
in the freezer.

No, that's not what I meant.
Are you all right?

Yes, absolutely fine.

I'm actually going to go
and have a quick bath.

Do you not want to,
I don't know, talk about it?

Talk about what?
Oh, a storm in a teacup.

It'll all be forgotten by tomorrow morning.
Do you want a bath after me?

No.
No, good, thanks.

Did you hear it?

Yeah, I heard her.

I heard it, the lads at the yard
heard it, my boss heard it.

Oh, God, what did you tell them?

Neil, what did you tell them?

- Has he said anything yet?
- No.

It's nonsense.
The woman's an idiot.

£3.10.

Why don't you have one for yourself, mate?

Hey, are you all right?
God, I'm hungry.

Have you eaten? Cos I was thinking
of ordering a takeout.

What's wrong?

'Village life...
The very term itself'

'conjures up images of summer...'

'Hello, this is Alex.
I can't get to the phone right now.'

'Please leave a message after the...'

Are you all right, Maggie?
Still in the bath?

Yeah, I won't be long.

Oh, Maggie...

Come here.

It's gonna be all right.

No, it's not!

It's not!

I didn't mean it, any of it.

- I was just talking.
- I know.

- You know, people talk.
- I know, I know.

But why would he do that?

It doesn't matter.

If it makes you feel any better,

I am, at some point,
going to break both his legs.

- I've ruined everything.
- No.

No, you haven't.

You haven't done anything
that can't be fixed.

Yes, I have.

I mean, how do you fix
a thing like this?!

I don't know.
I don't know.

Perhaps by stubbornly refusing to
acknowledge that it can't be fixed.

And you are the most stubborn woman I know.

We're gonna...
We're gonna talk to them.

All of them.

- One by one.
- Yeah.

We're not gonna lie,
we're not gonna make excuses.

- We're just gonna talk.
- Yeah.

- And we're gonna make it right.
- Yeah.

With all of them.

- Each and every one.
- Yeah.

- I don't know how.
- No.

- But we are.
- Yeah.

- A storm in a teacup.
- It's just a storm in a teacup.

- The things people are saying!
- They're just trolls, Maggie.

Neil, the entire village thinks
we've won the lottery.

Well, maybe that's the answer.

Jill, it's breaking her heart.

If you could just talk to her.

We are going to walk to the pub
with our heads held high.

We're gonna sit down,
we're gonna have a drink

as a family, just like normal!

What do you mean, "like normal"?

We have literally never done that, ever.

What goes around comes around, Roxy.
You'll see.

Would you like to know the truth, Maggie?

- Well, I...
- Oh, I think you deserve it.

Us outed six need to stick together.

- Right?
- Right.

I'm Thurlbury's local historian.

You run a gift shop, Maggie.

You just run a gift shop.

Peter, I'm a meme!