Original subtitles

Yo, what is up you guys?

Thanks for tuning in and welcome back to another episode of para-abnormal.

Now, before we get started, YouTube is actually showing me that 90%

of the people who watch these videos aren't actually subscribed.

So go and fuck your s-Now, we are down here in Duluth, Minnesota, where if you've been on the internet, at all, you know there

is a mysterious string of disappearances in the Northwoods, and the residents have some ideas, some crazy cookey ideas of...

Sorry, there's...

No, no, no, you have to pay, dude, I'm not...

cost money to take a picture of me, man, you can't do it for...

fucking... Sir, what's going on?

I've never seen this fancy city folk stuff before.

And he just runs away when I talk to him.

I love it here.

I know, I actually love it here.

That's so good.

We need more of that.

We need more of it.

We need more of it.

All right, no, that makes me feel good.

Let's just jump right in another one.

Thanks for tuning in and welcome back to another episode of Parra Abnormal.

We are down in Duluth, Minnesota, where if you've been on the internet, you know there is a string of

mysterious disappearances and the local population has some interesting ideas of what could be going on.

So strap in, take whatever you want to take,

because we're getting to the bottom of this.

We've got tingles.

Oh, it felt good.

That felt good.

Like, when I used to do wedding shoots, we would just

like drop foliage in front of the camera like that.

Like, yeah, it's like cheating, but it like works really...

Look at this key.

Have you ever been to a hotel room that uses a real key before?

I didn't know they even existed anymore.

This place is ancient.

Have you ever been to a hotel room that uses a real key before?

I didn't know they even existed anymore?

There it is.

There it is.

I have like used a real life key in so long.

I just fucking fob into every building.

I don't remember how.

I do.

My brain works.

All right.

Oh, shit.

Oh, not bad.

All right.

They've updated it a little.

drink, drink, drink.

Yeah, this'll be all right for a couple days.

What do we got next?

Well, we gotta go out and get some B-roll and I think we'll be done for the day.

We'll have fun of that and I'll see you when you are done.

You're not coming with?

No, no, fuck that.

Go get some like, bullshit, touristy shots of the city,

lift fridge, all that, and uh, and uh, I'm gonna nap.

Alright folks we'll get right back into the video in a second but before we do I just wanted to let you know that today's video is sponsored

by alpha raisers now folks if you're anything like me you have probably knit your sack while you've been doing trim work down But not anymore.

Now your first dates are going to be going better than ever.

You're going to be smoother than a bald man's head.

And at checkout, if you enter Paul's balls, you're getting a 10% discount.

You're saving too much money to pass that out, fellas.

Go do it.

I think we got it.

I think that was... I'm actually going to cut this.

Here he is after his big day out on the town.

No, good work today, Angela.

Thank you.

I'm going to go now.

Good night.

They are still calling and I'm still not answering.

It's not going to happen.

Fine.

I'm going to answer.

They are still calling and I'm still not answering.

It's not going to happen.

Fine.

I'm going to answer.

Hello?

I'm going to hang up.

I'm going to hang up.

You don't hang up.

You're sitting on the bed.

I'm going to call the police.

No, you don't do that.

You look in the bathroom.

Are you're holding it?

Are the cameras in here?

There is.

You're holding it.

Is this correct?

I thought to make note this later.

Flashlight time.

Whoo!

Ooh!

I'm a little too ahead.

This one is yours, and this one is mine because it

lights my face, which is the most important part.

We don't need this till it gets dark though.

Okay, so yeah, we're gonna go and meet Jordan.

Talk to her on the phone last night.

She's good, she knows the trails, she knows how to get in there, how to go.

Feeling good about this one.

Do you want me to hold a flashlight?

No, I got it, you got here.

No, I'll need it for later.

Sounds good.

They're tearing up this field here.

Maybe they'll put a parking lot or something.

That smells good.

It's so fucking beautiful here, dude.

I would move here.

Imagine walking this every day.

Really nice.

Oh, there she is.

Slow in the dark.

Wow.

Can't get lost with that light.

Tiny.

All right, my favorite part is meeting people.

I love to meet people.

It's so good.

Yeah.

I look with courage.

Whoa.

Howdy.

Hi.

Jordan, I assume.

Yeah, I'm Jordan..

Yeah, with Jordan.

Yeah, Paul.

Yeah, Paul.

Yeah..

Nice to meet you too.

Yeah, so we're already recording, but don't worry about it.

This is not what will actually be on like YouTube or anything like that.

Just in case anything happens, I want her to be filming the entire time.

Okay.

So this is a cool spot, but I'm thinking like we go

a little deeper in, find somewhere a little spookier.

Maybe I'll set up an interview spot, I'll ask me some questions.

See if we find anything scary, right?

Like, yeah, yeah, let's go.

Let's do it.

All right.

Sweet.

We've been here like a day and a half.

We've been here like a day and a half.

We've been staying at the Androy and Superior.

That's some pretty cool.

Pretty cool.

Yeah, Angela thinks someone was like pranking her the other day.

on there.

Oh my gosh.

Yeah, you want a good time?

Yeah.

Superior is the place.

You'll get phone calls from your own phone in Superior.

Yeah.

I mean, that's like a common scam thing.

They spoof your number.

I like the right hand.

That's definitely out of my league.

Left, right, right, left, right.

I like the right hand.

Right hand.

Yeah, I think there's some really lovely,

sweetie, lovely, yeah, it's kind of my favorite.

Looks way spookier to me anyway, so we're looking for scary.

We're looking for, well, man, whatever happens, but this is the way.

Let's go right then.

Yeah.

Yeah, this one runs along the river so it tends to be a little more open.

So, this one might give you what you're looking for.

Cool.

This is a beautiful place.

I love it here.

Yeah.

I was saying I would move here.

Like, I would honestly move here.

We're really lucky.

You know, like, I forget that not everybody could just walk

out of our house and end up like here in like five minutes.

Right, yeah.

Yeah, if I could do that, I would, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Of course we're always like, you don't like too many people to me here.

Right, that's the thing is, it's like if people like me

are like, hey, there's some real estate in this area.

Suddenly the area loses all appeal for everyone who already lives there.

Yeah.

For me, it's really important to conserve it and keep it in good shape.

Right.

Well, you got the right job for that.

Yeah, I'm trying.

Well, that makes sense.

Yeah, you got to conserve it from people like me.

I got you.

I got you.

We're not conserve it from people as much as conserve it for people.

Wow.

Oh yeah.

Wow.

I think we can use that line at some point.

We can edit that in later.

haven't done this much cardio in my entire life time.

I'm going to be like a Greek god when I get back to town.

Yeah.

It's good for you.

Good for your lungs.

Yeah, I know there's some great, great france out of here.

It's really, like if you like mountain biking, like if

you like mountain biking, it's a great place to come.

Yeah, I believe it.

Yeah.

Somebody is out of shape, you're definitely like, you're doing it.

Yeah, but like the problem is, is like under this jacket is a waterfall of sweat.

and my heart feels like it's going to die.

Yeah.

A friend once told me if you're going uphill just take smaller steps.

Smaller steps.

And just keep breathing.

Keep breathing.

Just keep breathing.

And you do get to walk around the bed of pine wood, though, so earthy too.

Yeah, I mean it feels soft.

Right, yeah.

Like, maybe one day I had like enough money.

I think I would make like a house where like, uh-huh.

There's no floor.

You just build walls around like some dirt, fine needles and that's all you need.

There might be a little cold up here.

Yeah.

I mean that is how houses were sometimes built, so.

Right.

We should probably do the interview.

introduction shot.

So it's like when you watch like a documentary and someone's

like I'm this person blah blah blah and then it just cuts away.

Okay.

That's all we're filming now so it's like I'm just gonna introduce myself

to you and then we're gonna say like you're this person blah blah blah blah.

Let's get into it.

Okay and then they're gonna go in front of us and we'll talk and we'll talk and we'll

talk and then they'll follow us and we'll ask you a little questions about the woods.

She only take like five minutes.

Okay.

Yeah.

You got, you feeling ready, Angela?

I think so.

Yeah, let me just get ready real quick.

Sponsored by Fireball?

Sponsored by Fireball, baby.

We're not, but we want to be.

All right.

You want to get a quick thumbnail before we start?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I mean, well, okay.

I mean, well, okay.

I mean, okay.

If she's there and I'm here and I'm just like pointing at her, is that okay?

That will work.

Yeah, all right, I'll give like a really, you just

have to have a normal fate, yeah, that's fine, yeah.

Is that good?

I hate this.

Yep, we're good.

Fine, all right, cool.

That'll be the cover of the YouTube video.

It's a bunch of nonsense.

It's my least favorite part too.

All right.

So pretend we have not met each other at this moment.

All right.

Hi everyone, my name is Paul.

Hi everyone.

Hey everyone, what is... We've already done the introduction.

All right, we are deep in the Northwoods and we are with our nature guide, our park ranger

Jordan, who has agreed for some reason to take us out here and to get real scared real fast.

Jordan, it is so nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you too.

Thank you so much for helping us out.

I don't know how we would navigate this stuff without you.

All right.

Thank you so much.

All right, that's all we needed.

You have basic questions, like nothing.

I'm not going to ask you to like algebra or like

describe the biological makeup of the river or anything.

None of our audience.

cares about is what is scary and in the woods.

That's a bird.

It's friendly.

That's friendly.

Don't worry yet.

From where I'm from, birds are not friendly.

So that is very scary.

We've all seen hitchcock.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

One second, we'll get into the interview.

We can slow down a little bit for the camera person.

We don't want to make Angela trip.

We don't want to make Angela trip.

We got to go at like half pace I would say.

I'm sorry.

Angela, walking backwards, our insurance does not like her walking backwards.

And be careful because the train really can be challenging at once.

Yeah, yeah.

Let's go a little faster than this though.

stabilization they don't need to worry about that shit whatever it's on YouTube people are watching it on like tiny screens who gives a fuck yeah no the whole future is on YouTube right now like TV this is not going on TV this would be a national

geographic like 10 years ago but now people watch this on their like wrist watch and they go oh looks interesting and then they tune off and share it on Facebook and nobody actually watches it but we get famous and get money it's the dream.

I might be in the wrong job you are everyone is in the wrong

job content creation baby that's what I'm saying Sorry.

So as we know there have been three disappearances.

Nationwide news happening in these woods.

We interviewed a lot of locals.

Okay.

They think it's aliens.

Someone suggested just a party of meth heads lived out here.

I don't necessarily know about any of these theories.

I'm not from here.

Do you have any insight or anything like

that as to what you think might be going on?

You know, I feel like, but first of all, I'm just, my heartbreaks for the

families who have lost people, who are hoping potentially for their... safe return.

You know, right now I have no idea.

I feel uncomfortable speculating about it.

Okay.

Just because it's like, who knows?

It is a problem.

You know, we try to warn people maybe not be in here at night alone.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I obviously am a person who almost always sides with science.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, me too.

So, you know, I'm hopeful that there'll be an

explanation that makes sense coming out at some point.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That would make sense.

Hopefully we don't find any of the bodies tonight, but... Oh my God, yeah, no.

Yeah.

I hope not.

And I hope they're still alive.

And I hope they're somewhere safe.

And I hope something gets figured out.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

That was kind of scary.

I think we can use a lot of that for like, we can

like montage it, like kind of over a splicer audio.

We could probably head back though..

I mean just we can just go none of it makes it on they

don't know it expires it's like a blood-red sunset.

Oh my god.

I love it.

Yeah, I.

Angela we shouldn't move here.

We should get some properties, we should get some houses, we

should buy a commune, we should start a cult, we should move here.

Uh-oh.

I do sometimes like come out and do that hiking.

Oh, so before I'll think that happened.

You know, it's peaceful.

You guys fucking hear that?

You heard that, right?

Yeah, you heard that, yeah.

Yeah, that was fucked up, right?

You heard that.

We're in the forest and, you know, we were making noise, so I can't tell, I mean, I mean, all is a squirrel like I don't know we heard something is that that's good enough right that sound I think that's good enough that's the end that

could be the end of the video we got your squirrel attack we got it we got the very end we got like the actually like in brackets after the title like nature guy takes out into the wood actually scary like we saw we saw we saw So it's there.

No, that was really good.

We got all we need.

That's it.

That's awesome.

Wow, I didn't actually think we were going to like get anything.

So get that.

We need that.

I don't know what for, we're not making a fucking art film, but we need that.

Yeah, maybe do like a slow pushing on it, you know, like, like

we're in fucking a Tarkovsky movie or something, you know?

Like, get some really boring music to play and everyone falls asleep in the

theater, but it, but it's like, but it's like, but it's like, All right now.

All right, let's keep going.

We gotta go.

It's getting dark.

Angela.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, get that out.

Uh-oh.

Are we all allowed to be here?

Oh.

Mm-hmm.

I won't tell you.

A lot of that.

restricted area.

Ooh.

So I'm supposed to right now, like.

Yeah, just, we, well, we need to see, but I need

to see you for the, if anything happens, you know?

Um, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, but you know where we're gone.

So we're, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we're, we're on your way, we're on your left.

happens, you know, whatever.

I think you gave me a dead one, Paul.

Is it dead?

Are you serious?

You gave me a dead flashlight?

Um, I've got...

Oh, shit.

Okay, no, I've got some batteries.

It's okay.

We'll replace...

Hope, we'll be back in time, it won't matter.

Yeah, we're just about that.

it's really cold out here.

Yeah, it is.

Cool.

It's fine.

But what I'm saying is we need you to not be a shit-taste.

It's fine, okay?

Like, it's... Where did the lights go?

It's... It's fucking park ranger.

Okay.

Maybe she's right when you should stop drinking.

Yeah, maybe she's right?

I don't think it's amazing.

All right.

Is that what this is like an intervention?

Like we came all the way down here to film a fucking intervention.

I love it.

We'll submit to A&E.

That'll get on TV.

You guys fucking hear something?

I don't know.

Huh.

Maybe you need to drink more.

No, I'm serious, there's fucking... I wish this goddamn flashlight work.

Fuck it.

I'm good.

I'm good.

You're all right?

You're okay.

Seriously, are you okay?

Good..

Ah!

We're fucking great!

That's the fucking time on my light!

What's going on?

What are you looking at?

You don't see it?

It's just right there.

There's nothing in there, Paul.

He's staring right at me.

We need to keep walking.

It's... It's looking into me.

Paul, come on.

Paul.

Paul, come on.

Paul, come on.

Paul, what are you doing?

Paul, we need to go.

What is he doing?

Paul, come on.

I'm sorry he's being like this.

He's, you know, he's putting us all in danger, and that's not okay.

I mean, he's putting us all in danger and that's not okay.

I mean I'm sorry we're lost no didn't want to knock you into this I know I know it's not your fault Angela I know I know it's not your fault and I know this situation sucks for everybody but come on Paul Paul I mean we

have to like we can't go and just leave him here we have to wait but like I'm just really getting really cold like I just got to keep moving get my staying warm just keep your feet going if you get if they start to go numb.

Paul come on Paul.

I see me answering us or not like it's it's just danger like you just don't do that.

I don't even know we either have to wait for him or I mean like I don't know we either have to wait for him or go after him like and I don't want to go off the trail and like get

even more loss I don't even know should we try go up a little bit see if he's at the like go this way we could try But we have to make sure we can get back here if we don't find him.

Because we can't leave somebody in the woods in the middle of the cold.

Like, it's dangerously cold.

But yeah, no, let's just go this way.

And you know, I keep thinking I know where I am.

And I'm like, if I do know where we are, then it's not going to

be too much further, and then maybe we can find, I don't know.

But yeah, let's go this thing.

I guess there's no snow in this part of the woods.

It's a woman.

Is she okay?

No, I think it might be one of the missing people.

She's definitely cold.

I don't think she's breathing.

And I just, I don't know what to do.

I'm gonna maybe call the cops except...

I still don't have reception.

I don't know what to do.

I don't have reception.

Should we try come back if we get out?

Yeah, I mean that's the only thing we could do.

I don't know what to do.

So, uh, let's just, um, yeah, let's try to remember where we are and try to come back.

I don't know.

Yeah, from from there.

I don't know.

Maybe if you go that way, we'll, like, maybe there's

people or like, maybe that's like the way to town.

It's worth a shot to try.

Yeah, I can barely hear it, but I think it is music.

I'll just go this way ahead.

Wait.

Is there someone sitting up there?

I don't think so.

I'm going to find it.

Let's not distract you.

Hello?

Excuse me, sir?

Sir?

Are you okay?

Do you hear it?

It's upon us though?

Do you hear it?

It's strong to the music, I know this, I

know this because I've seen it so many times.

I've witnessed it.

I've seen it so many times.

Oh, I've watched it I say.

I'm watching.

Oh, I watch the Grand Masterworks.

I have watched.

I am watching right now.

I'm watching right now watching right now.

Oh, there's so many roles to play.

Oh, the spiral is almost complete.

The sink is almost here.

There's so many pieces, there's so many pieces.

There's another part of the hole, the hole.

Let's get out of here.

Let's get out of here.

of you'll all play a big part of the promises.

Time's time for me to enact my portion of the prophecy.

Behold!

It's almost time to fulfill my privacy!

We've got to get out of here!

Behold!

Witness me?

Oh,!

there's me!

Oh, how beautiful the property-- And

it's daytime then.

I didn't even see the sun come up.

Do

you know the way out?

Do you know the way out?

Don't come closer.

Is someone there?

I think I might be lost.

Don't come closer.

Don't come closer.

What are you?

What?

Angela, is that you?

I need some help.

Jordan?

Jordan, is that you?

I need some help.

Free Phone, I guess.

We're still running and recording it looks like.

All the lenses are on you.

There's a lot of buttons here, dude.

Which one turns you over.

Look at how beautiful it is today.

Mother Nature sure is a wonder, especially today.

Like, the trees with the, like the leaves are out, like the perfect fall day.

There's no snow to be found.

The trees just kind of like stick right out of the,

right out of the earth, like one big network, you know?

They all just kind of co-exist they disagree with

each other you know like why can't people be that way?

Wow it's been a great day oh hi what else

is on here it's been a great day few videos already.

Oh, like that.

I think that.

Looks like In Gertow, man.

Gotta smoke way less.

Yo, what is up you guys?

Thanks for tuning in and welcome back to another episode of Parra Abnormal.

We are down in the lute Minnesota.

You're such a little familiar.

Oh, they've updated it a little.

What?

It'll be all right for a bubble day.

Sir, No, no, no, no.

So,

nothing is making sense to me right now as of what I've just seen.

to say the least.

So the best way to prove to myself that this is just some kind of a fluke and to prove to myself that this isn't real and this

isn't really happening I I have to go back to where the videos first started up to where these people are standing up here.

So once I see that there are no people up here, that's the best

way to prove to myself that I'm not nuts and that this is not real.

So there will be no people up here, I'll be okay.

Oh

my... How was this real right now?

Here's where you get stabbed.

Ching, Tring, Tring.

Yeah, that's a little...

It'll be all right for a couple days.

What we got next?

Well... This is real.

Oh, there's no going back now.

This, there's no going back now.

This is all actually happening.

This is real.

All right, so fantastic out.

Witness all the, all the beauties of nature out here.

If I could just spend the rest of my days out here.

Just getting in touch with the greater picture, you know?

That's what it's all about.

Just letting go and experiencing the greater plan.

Ah, wow.

Are you there?

I can sense your presence.

I know what I must do now.

I am not afraid.

I know what I must do now.

I am not afraid.

I know what my purpose is.

Please, please reveal yourself.

I think that's fine.

I think that's fine.

I think that has to be fun, right?

That's good.

Because I can't do it again.

It has to be fine.

I'm not, right?

I just once is enough, you know, like, I've, we're in the leafing Minnesota.

We're making a big food document.

I was supposed to make movies.

But it's fine.

Everything is okay.

It's just I... We're selling ball rangers and I just... I used to write scripts.

Did you know, I, you know, don't listen to me.

We're partying.

We're here to party, we're here to have fun.

I need it around, I need it all around.

Let's have.

Ha ha ha ha,

you don't hang up.

I've seen this.

I know what you're doing.

You don't hang up.

I've seen this.

I know what you're doing.

I've seen this.

I know what you're doing what you're doing sitting on the bed.

I've

Shutting the curtains.

I'm going to call the police.

You don't do that.

You look in the bathroom for me.

I'm not in the shower.

I'm not in the shower.

How do you know what you're doing?

Because I've seen it time and time again I have seen it.

I have seen it.

How do you see it?

Are you filming me?

Are there cameras in here?

There is.

You're holding it?

Is this what you want?

Is this what you want?

Is this correct?

I'm out here so long I just don't feel the need to leave at all, and I feel so thankful I just

don't feel the need to leave at all, and I feel so thankful for having all of this presented to me.

Thank you.

Thank you for being here for me to be able to present my thoughts to you

and to be able to witness your feedback to me to know what needs to happen.

And thank you so much for just being here in my time I need so

that I can be there for you to fulfill what needs to happen.

So it feels so right that I'm able to be here in my time I need.

to do this.

Thank you.

I'm thankful for you and I'm thankful for the great works.

And I'll check back in with you in a bit.

I heard so bad.

I gotta smoke way less.

Yo what is up you guys?

Thanks for tuning in and welcome back to another episode of Para Abnormal.

We are down in Duluth, Minnesota.

Where, if you've been on the internet, you know there is a string of mysterious

disappearances and the local population has some interesting ideas of what could be going on.

So, strap in, take whatever you want to take.

Because we're...

Yo, what is up you guys?

You don't see it?

You don't see it?

I'm looking right at it.

You can't see it.

It's... It's so beautiful.

Paul, come

on.

Paul, what are you doing?

Paul, we need to go.

Paul, we need to go.

Paul.

None of this would have been possible without you.

It was your phone.

Your phone going in circles.

Taking us with it, showing us the divine truth.

Loop after loop that we would never have known about if it wasn't for you, Paul.

I can feel them.

I can feel all my infinite other self.

I can feel the eternal suffering.

Oh, the sweet suffering.

Your spiral begins.

Oh

no, though, this doesn't look right.

It's a woman.

Is she okay?

No.

I think it might be one of the missing people.

I don't think she's breathing.

Paul?

Is that you?

I'm going to find that one of this record.

I have to come back for the camera.

I need to come back for the camera.

I need this posterity to get to any authorities in case I don't.

In case I don't, I guess I don't, I guess I don't, I guess I don't, I guess I don't,

This camera has evidence of two murders and other crimes and I don't,

there's something out there's something out here and I

don't, there's something out here and I don't understand it.

I don't know, there's something out here and I don't understand it and I don't know.

Paul.

We're down here.

Paul.

Where if you've been on the internet.

Paul?

What's funny to take your picture?

And he can't do it for me.

Are you watching me?

Are you watching me?

Where did you go?

Where did you go?

Where did you go?

Hello?

What's the phone?

Well, hello?

Well, hello?

Cute.

I know all the fucking lenses on this thing.

We're somehow rolling and recording on this too, huh?

We're somehow rolling and recording on this too, huh?

How the hell does this happen?

I'm in the bath.

You guys, thanks for tuning in and welcome back to another episode of para-abnormal.

We are down to the loose Minnesota.

Where, if you've been on the internet, you know there is

a string of mysterious disappearances, and the local... We're still...

what else is on

a few videos already?

Um, all right, no, that makes it feel good.

Let's just jump right into that.

all right.

Oh, good time.

Oh, that hurts so bad.

What is up you guys?

Thanks for tuning in and welcome back to another episode of Parra Abnormal.

We are down to the loose Minnesota.

If you've been on the internet, you know there is a string

of mysterious, interesting ideas of what could be going on.

So... There's no going back now that it could all actually ask an accent..

This is so fucked.

No, I think it might be one of the missing people.

She's definitely cold.

I don't think she's breathing.

We're not doing this.

Do you see what I've done for you?

Are you proud?

Ha ha ha!

I've fulfilled my purpose.

I'm not doing that.

No.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

Oh.

H.

You know?

H...

Thank you.