Original subtitles

Just think, one of those guys could be president of the United States one of

these days.

Yeah, if they ever get through Pledge Week.

We get through Pledge Week.

Isn't Chris in that fraternity this year?

Yeah, my son, you know, he spends all his time in class and the library.

He's a studio stud, you know, scholarship winner.

He helped me get my A in Ink and Civilization II last year.

Still into archaeology?

Six more years of this and I'm off to Machu Picchu, Peru.

Of course, right now I'm off to the Harbor Freeway. The Harbor Freeway or

Indianapolis? What kind of crack is that?

We've been hearing some weird stories about you lately.

About your driving.

Like how overnight you're in a class with a pole sitter at Indy? Well, how

about it, left foot? Any truth to the rumors?

There's Dean's car again.

Listen, I'm on probation.

They catch me, I'm expelled.

Better that than dead.

I will be dead. My father catches me.

What kind of cruiser is this? Quit telling me just when I'm going good. I

could have got those jerks.

Candy, there's a nice paved street here. You didn't have to fly off the

embankment. No, Monday morning quarterback.

They make one of the greatest moves in my career. He complains.

Why don't you come over tonight?

Throw a couple steaks on the fire. All right, great. I'll bring the wine. And

the girls. One girl. You get your own. All right, I'll take a stab at it.

Hey, just the two guys I want to see.

Probably about that old piece of pottery I showed him yesterday.

This whole building's probably sitting on the lost city of the Incas, and now

we're going to have to move.

Of course. Why kid you about your guys?

Whoops.

Apologize to you two guys for, uh, yelling at you.

Yelling? Yeah.

You know, when I chewed you two guys out, I... I want to apologize for that.

Oh, you just tried something that didn't come off, that's all.

You weren't yelling at us.

Come on, John.

Don't treat me with kid gloves now, huh? Hey, look, all you did was suggest that

maybe we, uh, Monday morning quarterbacked you.

And maybe we did.

No, it wasn't.

It wasn't what I said.

It was the way I said it.

And that's what I want to apologize for, C.

Because I was way out of line, and... I'm really sorry for that.

Sure, but... Hey, John, come on. The guy off the hook, huh? Yeah, I didn't know

the guy was on the hook.

accepted.

Hey, Chris boy, hey, what a pleasant surprise. What are you doing here?

Huh?

I figured I might as well see my closest relative at least once today.

What are you talking about? Aren't we going out for dinner?

Professor Dichter gave us a test today. I'm spending the next couple of nights

in the library.

Oh, boy, this Professor Dichter, what a martinet.

Hey, you guys know each other, don't you? Yeah.

Does this mean that you're free to break some bread with me and John?

He sure is.

OK, be at my place in one hour, OK?

I'll be there.

Can you give me a ride back to the campus? I took the bus down. Yeah, sure.

Come on.

How are you feeling today?

I feel great. I'm top of the world.

Cancel the girls.

I'm going to kill him!

Stealing a bird.

Come on, Dad.

You're a cop. Aren't you going to go out with him?

It was just like chasing greased pigs at a county fair.

I think I cracked a rib laughing.

Just thinking, years to come, that son will become a legend on fraternity row.

Yeah.

Even my no sense of humor son's gonna get hysterical over that one.

You mean Chris didn't think it was funny?

He thought I should have gone after him.

Maybe you should have. I mean, what if that helicopter would have dropped that

pledge or that statue?

Oh, sure.

I can see me and my economy for a banger.

Chasing some helicopter across town, huh?

Hey, I gotta tell you guys that looks like Chris is going to get that

scholarship. We didn't know he was up for one.

Why do you think he spends all of his nights at the library, Potch?

Look at you.

Got that look on his face again.

Oh, I was just wondering who swiped that statue.

Does Chris know anything?

Yeah.

The Upsalons.

They're going to be talked to.

That's the engineering students, right?

Yeah. They'd be the ones who know about the helicopters.

Oh, hey, look, forget.

Put your back cover.

Cover what?

What's that for, Andy?

Well, you know I don't take freebies, Punch.

I mean, you know that about me.

It's for all this. That's what it's for.

Hey, you're my guest, Andy.

I invited you to dinner.

If it was going to be Dutch Street, I would have said so, but it isn't.

Yeah, put your money away, man.

Don't patronize me, eh, Punch?

You think I don't know?

You really think I don't know why you invited me here tonight?

Well, I got news for you, pal.

I understand perfectly.

Andy, come on, you're a guest here.

Hey, it's okay, Johnny.

All right, Andy, why do you think I invited you here for?

Tell us what you think.

Because you think I'm crazy, don't you?

We just take a look at the look of your face.

Vagina and punch.

It's as plain as day, you know.

I got those for you. You guys can go palm sand.

And you.

And you and Guthrie.

And all of you!

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. That better cover it. If you don't like

it, then sue me.

Andy's not here yet.

What? Ah, nothing.

Oh, yeah, I've been thinking the same thing. I wonder if we should confide in

Guthrie. Yeah, and if we do, and it turns out that Andy's just tired, we've

bad-mouthed a damn good officer.

All right, I just have a few items this morning.

Number one, scratch 63 boy from the beat priority.

Stokowski is taking four hours of CTO and won't be hitting the bricks until 1

,300 hours.

And for those of you working the north end, a pledge week note on the

kidnapping of the Zaikai fraternity statue.

The bird.

The bronze bird happens to have been given as a gift to Zaikai by the

immortal Franz Broccopi himself, a former brother.

So the statue's valuable, right?

Valuable enough to be held for ransom.

And not for birdseed either, huh?

You never disappoint your fans, do you, Grossman?

Okay, that's it. Get to work.

I'd like to talk to Andy's son, Chris, at the college library.

Who knows?

I may even take out a book.

That'll be the day.

Frankly, I don't know what's wrong with him.

I was hoping you guys could tell me.

All I know is he's got something on his mind.

Big enough to give him a headache.

You mean that literally? I mean, a migraine headache?

That's what he claims.

He keeps saying it's nothing serious, but he squinches up his eyes.

It's hard for him to breathe. He takes aspirin by the handful.

Does he ever yell at you for no reason at all?

I wouldn't call headaches that bad no reason at all.

Yeah, but I mean, he does do it. And then he gets real apologetic, right?

Apologetic. Breaks into tears.

Yeah, we know.

Either that or he starts laughing.

Should have seen him when they helicoptered away the statue.

You tell you about that?

Cracked him up, huh?

I thought he'd asphyxiate himself.

Just couldn't stop laughing.

You ever tried to talk to him? I mean, pin him down?

He claims that there's nothing to talk about.

He says that, um...

I'm making him paranoid.

The next thing I'm going to do is go around tilting all the pictures on the

walls and telling him that they're perfectly straight.

Sometimes I don't think he's kidding.

I wanted to talk to you guys.

Ask if you'd talk to him.

You think he'd be more open with us than he'd be with his own son?

Sure wanted to try me, huh?

It's like there's somebody else inside of him.

Somebody coming between us.

I want to help him.

I just don't know how.

We'll do the best we can. I promise you that, Chris.

Yeah, you can believe it.

Thank you.

See you later.

You'll feel better already.

Uh-oh.

Well, well, well.

Dropping a pickup.

Hey, doper, you want to race? We're going to race.

Okay, you win the battle, we'll win the war!

Excuse me, Sarge, but no...

That there was a ransom payoff going down.

Excuse me, stick... I mean, I thought I had a good narcotics bus going down.

Oh, yeah, I, uh... I guess you did.

I mean, I would have yelled at me, too, you know.

I would have yelled at me, too.

Hey, listen, tell me, uh, how much are they trying to extort for that statue?

Don't ask, huh?

This is some day, isn't it?

Boy, you know, you guys...

Dr.

Wilson to ICU, please. Dr. Wilson.

Dr. Grant, call 3 West please. Dr. Grant.

Let's go celebrate. What do you say?

Celebrate what, Andy? My clean bill of health, man.

A little pain in the spell didn't mean a thing.

You could have fooled us.

There it is.

Black and white.

Nothing wrong with me, except I gotta cut out some of those late nights at the

wild parties.

Doctor's orders.

What's this about the celebration?

Well, I thought we'd go hoist a few at the Boom Boom Bazaar. What do you say?

How does that fit in with no late nights and wild parties, eh?

Right, scratch the boom-boom bazaar.

Home and hot milk it is.

You guys can't blame me for wanting to hoop it up a little. Takes a big load

off my mind.

I'll see you guys.

How'd you know it'd be here? It had to be. What's his name? The, uh, Upsilon

president? His dad owns this garage.

Well, there's nobody around.

Wanna strike while the iron's hot?

They still say they're going to throw book ads to figure us out. For what?

It's just a college pledge we drank.

Then we're going to give them the ransom back?

Did you hear that?

Give the ransom back.

63, boy, 20-unit northbound vicinity, bottom drive-in, 4th Street.

In pursuit, two vehicles, one flatbed truck with a statue not tied down, the

other 1970 Plymouth, California license, 3

-5-0.

Boy, Adam, Robert.

Mary 3 and 4 responding, 63, will be coming up 4th on the Harbor Freeway.

We'll attempt to intercept.

10-4, don't you?

Hey, the cop wants us to pull over, man.

For what?

All we're doing is chasing the guys who stole the goshawk. They stole their own

statue? Yes.

machiavellian aren't they there's two more on motorcycles we need to pull over

oh boy just what we needed hey look i want you to stop so stop

stop come on i need it what's the gears hey man we'll make it come on look

you may not know when to quit but i do

our own statue, officer.

Come on, Harold, that's not all you were doing.

Hey, you wanted to bring you up on charges in front of the fraternity

council? Well, you might have to wait with that until we bring you up on

charges in front of the judge.

Well, what do you think, boys?

We make a great team, don't we?

Team Andy? You almost turned us into peanut butter on the pavement.

That's colorful, Ponch, but it's not true.

I was in complete control all the way.

John. Why doesn't he understand that? Hey, I don't understand it, Andy. I

mean, you're out there risking our lives. Is that what you're trying to

tell us?

Oh, come on, John.

We weren't risking anything.

Trust me.

We're heroes.

I don't know about you, man, but I don't see any improvement.

Clean bill of health.

See, all he was doing was waving that note in front of us. He didn't let us

read it.

Dr. Stockley, telephone call.

Dr. Stockley?

Dr. Stockley, telephone call.

Stockley?

Dr. Stockley?

We had you paged. We'd like to consult you about a colleague of ours, Andy

Stokowski.

You know, I want to see some authorization.

We thought you would.

Officer, Stokowski's my father. Oh, and you want clarification of the diagnosis

I gave him?

He said he'd been overdoing it.

Fatigue was implied.

Fatigue? Being a neurosurgeon, we couldn't understand why he would consult

you on a simple case of overwork. That's what he told you, overwork.

Why am I surprised? I should be used to it.

It's a lot more serious than that, isn't it?

You got a backbone.

Are you gonna collapse on me?

Maybe you better sit down.

That bad?

Your father has a lesion on the brain.

It's large.

It's malignant.

It's inoperable.

It's terminal.

All right, sir. Thank you. Drive carefully.

Well, well, well.

You boys pull up here to talk about my little party, huh?

Party? Yeah.

My party at the Boom Boom Bazaar.

Johnny, what's happened to your memory, huh?

We didn't come to talk about your party, Andy.

We just came from talking with Chris and Dr.

Stokely.

You have no right.

You have no right to do that, Punch.

It's none of your business.

It is our business.

You almost killed us out there, and I don't think you knew it.

What do you think you're talking to, some rookie?

Oh, John, no matter what's wrong with me, it doesn't affect my work.

That's exactly what we're talking about. It does, Andy.

Oh, boy, you boys are really something. You know that?

You'd think I was going to die tomorrow.

You said you'd deny it.

Deny what?

That I have a brain tumor?

Yeah, okay.

What's there to deny?

I've got a brain tumor.

I've got maybe a year or two left. So what?

What would you be doing, Ponch?

Would you be sitting at home looking at some game show or soap?

That's a real useful life, isn't it?

That's exactly why I didn't want to tell anybody what was wrong with me.

Because you guys are looking at me here now like I got this thing in my head.

And that completely altered your judgment of my competence.

Andy, our judgment of your competence was altered before we knew what was

wrong. Now, that's possible.

Because I've been at the top of my form all the way through this, and you say,

haven't you? You're a liar.

Just let Sergeant Couture be the judge of that.

You guys,

you go to jail.

You think I got two years left?

I got maybe two weeks left.

Is that what you want to do?

You know how many lives I can save out there during that time?

Even if it's only one life, you think it wouldn't be worth it?

Okay. Okay.

It's all right.

There's no problem. I'll go talk to Betrayer.

You guys just relax, sit here, and tell yourselves what great friends

you are to him.

Yeah, sure. It's easy for you.

You'll be off suspension by the time next term rolls around.

I'll be pumping gas in my old man's filling station.

Hey, look, some other college is bound to take you. I mean, your grades aren't

that bad.

Yeah, who's gonna pay for my tuition? My living quarters?

Hey, look, your old man isn't really gonna cut you off. He means it, Paul.

Those lousy Upsalons really did it to me this time.

I don't think anyone meant to single you out.

They're gonna regret it, though.

I'm not going without taking a few of them with me.

Hey, if you're thinking of doing something crazy again, you can count me

out.

Don't worry about it, buddy.

I'm gonna take care of this one all by myself.

Do that.

You want to talk to us, Sarge?

Yeah, I want to talk to you about Andy Stokowski.

You two must have had a pretty heavy talk.

A party at the Boom Boom Bazaar is your idea of heavy, Frank?

That's what he told you about?

You're supposed to know all about it. He said you were co-chairman of the event.

What? Maybe he just forgot to tell you about it. Whatever. The point is, I'm

not against you having the party. I'm just against the place in which he wants

to hold it.

You know, I would have thought... Look, I'm not a prude, John.

Where you guys go when you're off duty is up to you, except when that place is

under surveillance by the local vice narcotic squads.

Look, it's not funny, Frank.

I want you guys to have a talk.

Hi, John.

Come on, you know how early the parking lot fills up around the Hollywood Bowl.

We don't get there by six. It'll take us till the concert starts to find our

seats. Especially when you got Pearlman doing that Mendelssohn Violin Concerto

you told me about, Neil. The place will probably be packed.

Yeah, what's the symphony? It's Mahler's First.

Andy? Open the door.

Andy! Hey, Andy, open the door!

Andy!

You're gonna have to call an ambulance.

Andy, open the door!

Ambulance?

What, are you guys sick or what, huh?

Never mind us. What about you?

Oh, boy.

Pull over to rest my eyes for a minute, and the next thing I know I'm, uh... Rip

Van What's-his-name, huh?

When'd you pull over to, uh, rest your eyes?

Child, I'm joking.

When do you think it was, this morning? Yesterday afternoon?

Did you call in for a break?

Oh, boy.

No sense of humor.

Kind, considerate courteous, but no sense of humor.

We're in for a real storm, aren't we?

Andy, there isn't a cloud in the sky.

What are you talking about, Bunch?

Look how dark it is.

You're kidding me, boys.

I'm not kidding, Andy.

Oh, so soon.

So stickin' soon.

Stokely said it was gonna happen like this, but...

You said it was going to be a year.

This ain't even a month.

What kind of doctor is this?

Andy, doctors say you go blind.

It's going to be all right. It's getting lighter already.

I'm going to be all right.

You're not going to be all right, Andy, and you know it.

You didn't go to Gutierrez's office this morning. Punch!

I'm not quitting before I have to! I'm not!

Andy, wait a minute.

You don't have to quit.

Just take some light duty or some sick leave.

What a desk job.

I'm a field officer.

Oh, not now.

and 1185 for one. Yes, all right.

Don't move, man.

You can't move.

My back.

Piece of metal.

Shrapnel.

Don't move, man. I mean it, all right?

It's okay, Johnny.

It's all right.

Remember when I said if I could save one life,

it would...

He is perfect.

In memory of Officer Andrew Stokowski, CHP, with gratitude and affection, are

members of the Psi Chi and Epsilon fraternities graduating class of 1981.

I think I'm gonna wait till I get home. I'm just gonna start crying like a baby

right here.

Molly deserves every bit of it.

I just had this feeling.

I'd like it a whole lot more if a bird had, like, a big cigar in its beak or a

pair of sunglasses.

You know something?

That's the truth.

Why don't we go pick it up and sneak back later tonight, huh?

You got it.