Original subtitles

JIMMY!

JIMMY!

JIMMY!

COME ON, JIMMY,

I KNOW YOU CAN

HEAR ME. COME ON.

COME ON, THIS

ISN'T PRODUCTIVE.

HEY, JAMES FRANCIS

FINNERTY, COME ON OUT!

JIMMY?

ANY SIGN OF HIM?

NO.

ARE YOU EVEN LOOKING?

YEAH, I'M LOOKING.

YOU'RE A TERRIFIC UNCLE,

YOU KNOW.

JIMMY!

HOW CAN YOU EAT THIS

LOWFAT CREAM CHEESE?

IT'S LIKE PASTE.

WHAT KIND DO YOU

HAVE AT YOUR HOUSE?

I DON'T KEEP FOOD

AT MY HOUSE.

WHY WOULD YOU?

OH, AND YOU'RE

ALL OUT OF JELLY,

EXCEPT FOR GRAPE.

NOW GET IN

THE BACKYARD AND

LOOK FOR JIMMY.

COME ON.

STILL NO SIGN

OF HIM, HUH?

WHOO! LOOK AT YOU.

HING--CHOW--

DING--GOW!

IT'S THE REGULAR

OLD WORK CLOTHES, BABY.

WELL, I'M NEVER HOME

WHEN YOU GO TO WORK.

HA HA HA HA!

OH, YES,

THIS IS VERY GOOD.

WHAT BETTER WAY

OF LURING OUR SON

OUT OF HIDING

THAN THE PROMISE OF

SEEING HIS PARENTS

HAVING SEX?

IT'S NOTHING

HE HASN'T SEEN

BEFORE.

NOT A MEMORY THAT'S

HELPING YOUR CAUSE.

DID YOU CHECK

THE ATTIC?

NO.

SO, SO FAR

YOUR ENTIRE

SEARCH PROCESS

HAS CONSISTED OF YOU

WANDERING AROUND

THE HOUSE

YELLING "JIMMY"?

NO, I ALSO SWORE A LOT.

HMM. HOW'D THAT

WORK OUT?

NOT GREAT.

YEAH. ALL RIGHT.

YOU JUST

LET THE MASTER

TAKE OVER.

I'M HIS MOM, I KNOW

HOW HE THINKS.

YOU GOTTA CALL WORK

AND TELL THEM

I'M GONNA BE

A LITTLE BIT LATE.

[MODEM SCREECHING]

Lily: OHH! I'M ONLINE!

SORRY!

OH, NICE JOB!

DISCONNECTED!

HEY, WAIT! SHOULDN'T

YOU BE AT SCHOOL?

I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY.

I WAS UPLOADING

MY HOMEWORK.

NOW IT'S DESTROYED.

THE FILE IS DESTROYED.

YOU WERE IN

THE JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE

CHAT ROOM.

YOU DON'T KNOW THAT.

GOD, I'M SO FAT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE

I'M EATING THIS.

AH, YOU'RE NOT FAT.

YOU'RE A LITTLE

STICK GIRL.

IT'S DISTURBING.

THANK YOU.

DON'T EAT

BOTH OF THEM.

DAD,

WHAT'S THAT?

BROUGHT YOU

A LITTLE SOMETHING

I FOUND AT WORK.

Claudia:

YOU WORK AT A DUMP.

I SUPERVISE

A SANITARY LANDFILL.

LOOK WHAT SOME IDIOT

THREW AWAY--

A PERFECTLY GOOD SET

OF ENCYCLOPEDIAS.

OH, MY GOD! WELL,

THEY HAVE THE STENCH

OF DEATH ON THEM.

YOU DON'T

SMELL THEM,

YOU READ THEM.

WHY DON'T YOU KEEP THEM

AT YOUR HOUSE?

I'LL JUST PUT THEM

DOWN HERE FOR YOU,

LET THEM BREATHE.

JIMMY AIN'T OUT THERE.

OK, YOU ARE PATHETIC.

I WILL FIND HIM.

I ALWAYS FIND HIM.

JIMMY'S LOST?

NO, NO, HE'S--

HE'S JUST HIDING. AGAIN.

WHY ISN'T HE IN SCHOOL?

UH, HE'S NOT GOING

TO SCHOOL THIS WEEK,

AND I DIDN'T DO

ANYTHING WRONG.

OH, SEANY SCREWED UP

AGAIN, DIDN'T HE?

NO, NO, DAD. LOOK...

SUNDAY WAS "THE TASTE

OF STATEN ISLAND"

FESTIVAL,

SO WE WENT, SO WE COULD

DO SOMETHING TOGETHER

AS A FAMILY.

OHH! EWW.

WHAT?

I DON'T WANT

ANYBODY FROM SCHOOL

TO SEE ME WITH THEM.

WHY NOT?

A TIGER AND A ZEBRA?

IT'S SO GAY.

HEY! HO, HO!

THAT'S NOT

AN APPROPRIATE

THING TO SAY.

I'M GAY 'CAUSE

I'M A ZEBRA?

NO!

ARE TIGERS GAY?

NO.

WHAT'S GAY?

NOTHING, NOTHING.

GAY MEANS NOTHING.

I'M GAY.

BUT I'M SEEING

SOMEONE RIGHT NOW.

THEY HAVE A GLASS BLOWING

DEMONSTRATION AT 5:30,

CANDLE DIPPING...

HOLD THIS. HOLD THIS.

OH, MY GOD. [CHUCKLES]

DO YOU KNOW WHO'S PLAYING

AT THE BANDSHELL TONIGHT?

I GIVE UP.

MM-HMM.

RAMONES!

RAMONES!

RAMONES?

THE RAMONES,

IN THEIR FAREWELL TOUR.

WE GO TO ALL THEIR

FAREWELL TOURS.

YEAH, AND YOU NEVER KNOW,

THIS COULD BE THE LAST ONE.

HEY, I WASN'T

TAKING ANY CHANCES.

AH, THE RAMONES

ARE SO GAY.

WHY? ARE SOME

OF THEM ZEBRAS?

I WANT TO WIPE

MY FACE OFF.

WE GOTTA

GET GOING.

JIMMY,

IT'S THE RAMONES.

IT'S THE SEMINAL

CULTURAL EVENT

IN YOUR YOUNG LIFE.

I HAVE TO MAKE A MODEL

OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM

FOR MY SCIENCE CLASS.

AND YOU WILL, OK?

BUT IT CAN WAIT A DAY.

TRUST ME, SON. TOMORROW,

THE SOLAR SYSTEM

IS GONNA BE THERE.

BUT THE RAMONES

ARE GONNA BE ON A BUS

TO PENNSYLVANIA,

AND WHO KNOWS WHEN

THEY'RE COMING BACK?

COME ON, GUYS,

I WANT TO GET THERE

BEFORE THE MOSH PIT

FILLS UP.

OK.

LOOK, JIMMY,

WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE,

THE RAMONES BURST

ONTO THE SCENE

AND THEY

CHANGED THE FACE

OF ROCK AND ROLL.

POST-PUNK, GRUNGE,

SPEED METAL--

NONE OF IT WOULD HAVE

HAPPENED WITHOUT THEM.

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE

TO TRUST ME ON THIS ONE.

I'M YOUR FATHER, OK?

THE RAMONES

ARE MORE IMPORTANT

THAN THE SOLAR SYSTEM.

♪ 20--20--24 HOURS TO GO ♪

♪ I WANNA BE SEDATED ♪

♪ NOTHING TO DO,

NOWHERE TO GO--OH ♪

♪ I WANNA BE SEDATED ♪

♪ JUST GET ME TO THE AIRPORT,

PUT ME ON A PLANE ♪

♪ HURRY, HURRY, HURRY,

BEFORE I GO INSANE ♪

♪ I CAN'T CONTROL

MY FINGERS ♪

♪ I CAN'T CONTROL MY BRAIN,

OH, NO, OH-HO OH-OHH ♪

OK, JIMMY'S NOT

IN THE ATTIC.

NOW I HAVE TUFTS

OF INSULATION

IN MY DRESS.

WHOA.

STOP PICTURING IT.

YOU DON'T KNOW

WHAT I'M THINKING.

START SWEARING.

YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.

NOT MY STYLE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

JUST MAKING SURE

YOU GET CHUNKY

PEANUT BUTTER.

YOU NEVER GET

CHUNKY.

KIDS DON'T LIKE CHUNKY.

GET CREAMY, TOO.

THAT'S NO PROBLEM.

IF I BUY YOU CREAMY,

WILL YOU EAT IT

AT YOUR HOUSE?

I DON'T HAVE ANY BREAD.

I'LL GET YOU BREAD.

ALL RIGHT, I'M LEAVING

THE BASEMENT NOW.

WHEN I TURN OFF

THIS LIGHT,

IT IS GONNA BE VERY DARK

AND VERY SPOOKY.

PERFECT FOR A GHOST.

[CLICK]

OOOH--OOOOH!

OOOH--OOOH!

Sean: CHILDREN,

I EAT CHILDREN.

WE CAN RULE OUT

THE BASEMENT.

SO IT SEEMS

THAT CONCERT

YOU DRAGGED JIMMY TO

REALLY DROVE HIM

AROUND THE BEND.

NO, IT WASN'T THE CONCERT.

EVERYTHING WAS COOL

UNTIL THE NEXT MORNING.

OW!

HI, KIDDO.

WHAT?

GOOD MORNING.

WHAT?

HE MAY HAVE BEEN

STANDING A LITTLE

TOO CLOSE

TO THE SPEAKER

LAST NIGHT.

OH, UH, SORRY, GUY.

WHICH GUY?

DON'T WORRY.

WHAT?

HEY, SOLDIER,

WHAT YOU BUILDING

OVER THERE?

I TOLD YOU, I HAD

TO BUILD A MODEL

OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM.

HONEY, DO YOU WANT

SOME HELP WITH THAT?

UM, NO, NO, NO.

NO, MOM.

BUT, SEE, THESE ARE--

IT'S FINE.

THIS ONE HAS THE TAPE--

I'LL FIX IT.

THAT WAS JUPITER, MOM.

IT'S IN

THE MILKY WAY,

RIGHT?

IS THAT SUPPOSED

TO BE FUNNY?

SORRY.

[SIGHS] IT'S RUINED.

WHY'D YOU MAKE ME GO

TO THAT STUPID CONCERT?

OH, COME ON,

JIMMY, HEY.

DUDE, WE WERE

OPENING YOUR MIND.

BESIDES, YOU HAD

A GOOD TIME LAST

NIGHT, DIDN'T YOU?

[BLITZKRIEG BOP PLAYING]

I HATED IT.

HEY, LILY, YOU

LIKED THE RAMONES,

DIDN'T YOU?

WELL, THE MUSIC

WAS GOOD,

BUT THEY WERE JUST

RIPPING OFF GREEN DAY.

YOU GUYS

HEAR MY BRAIN

BUZZING?

LILY,

CAN YOU TAKE HENRY

TO SCHOOL, PLEASE,

SO HE DOESN'T

GET HIT BY A TRUCK?

ALL RIGHT.

[LOUDLY] LET'S GET GOING!

I'M TAKING YOU

TO SCHOOL TODAY!

THANKS,

I ALREADY HAD SOME!

I'M GONNA GET IN TROUBLE.

NO, YOU'RE NOT.

I'M YOUR FATHER, OK?

I'M GONNA

WRITE YOU A NOTE.

OK?

[MIMICS PUNK MUSIC]

SO I JUMP ON STAGE--WOW!

OH, SHOOT.

WHAT ARE YOU,

FREAKING KIDDING ME,

FINNERTY?!

WHAT KIND OF

FLUNKING OPERATION

DO YOU THINK

I'M RUNNING HERE?

THIS IS THE NEW YORK

SMECKING SUBWAY SYSTEM!

YOU DIRT-SUCKING

PIECE OF CAKE!

Sean: YEAH, SO I GO TO

SEE JIMMY'S PRINCIPAL,

AND SHE'S ALL...

RESPONSIBILITY...

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,

BLAH, BLAH...

ROLE MODELS...

Sean: AND ALL ABOUT HOW...

GOOD WORK HABITS

BEGIN AT HOME.

ABSOLUTELY, SISTER.

I APPRECIATE EVERYTHING

THAT YOU'RE SAYING,

AND I UNDERSTAND--

MM-HMM.

WELL, I'M NOT SURE

THAT YOU DO,

MR. FINNERTY.

LET ME READ--

"DEAR SISTER HELEN,

"PLEASE EXCUSE JIMMY

FOR NOT HAVING

HIS SOLAR SYSTEM.

"THE RAMONES WERE

PERFORMING AT

A FESTIVAL LAST NIGHT,

AND HIS MOTHER AND I

FELT IT WAS IMPORTANT

THAT HE NOT MISS IT."

THAT WAS SUCH

A LAME NOTE.

IT WAS THE TRUTH!

YOU DON'T TELL

THE TRUTH IN A NOTE.

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LIE!

"JIMMY'S SICK,"

"JIMMY SPRAINED HIS ANKLE,"

"JIMMY'S

GRANDFATHER DIED."

WHAT?

AS AN EXAMPLE.

LOOK, I'M NOT GONNA

TEACH MY SON TO LIE.

BUT YOU WILL

TAKE HIM

TO SOME CONCERT

WHEN HE SHOULD BE

DOING HIS HOMEWORK?

NOT SOME CONCERT, DAD,

THE RAMONES!

I DON'T CARE

IF IT WAS

THE RAMONES.

I DON'T CARE

IF JIMI HENDRIX

ROSE FROM THE GRAVE.

A CONCERT

IS NOT AS IMPORTANT

AS HOMEWORK.

WHOA, WHOA, WAIT,

EVEN IF JIMI HENDRIX

ROSE FROM THE GRAVE?

WELL, OK, THAT MIGHT

BE THE EXCEPTION.

A-HA!

I'M A NUN.

I COULDN'T VERY WELL

IGNORE

A RESURRECTION.

SISTER, THEN YOU ADMIT

THERE MIGHT BE

A THEOLOGICAL REASON

TO ATTEND A CONCERT.

I DON'T SEE

WHAT THAT HAS TO DO

WITH ANYTHING.

JUST THAT IT'S POSSIBLE.

MR. FINNERTY,

WE'RE TALKING ABOUT

THE RAMONES.

THEY'RE NOT DEAD,

THEY'RE JUST

OVER THE HILL.

OH, COME ON.

I CAN'T EVEN TELL

ROCK 'N' ROLL

HIGH SCHOOL

FROM ROCKAWAY

BEACH.

THEY'RE PRACTICALLY

THE SAME SONG.

NO! THAT'S--NO!

THAT'S NOT TRUE.

I MEAN, OK, OK,

GRANTED,

THEY HAVE THE SAME

"ROCK, ROCK" PART,

BUT OTHERWISE,

THEY'RE TOTALLY

DIFFERENT SONGS,

THEY'RE TOTALLY DIFFERENT.

MM-HMM. WELL,

WHAT'S IMPORTANT

HERE

IS NOT HOW

ARTISTICALLY LIMITED

THE RAMONES ARE.

WHAT'S IMPORTANT

IS THAT YOU SEEM

TO HAVE DECIDED

THAT YOU KNOW BETTER

THAN WE DO HOW TO

EDUCATE YOUR SON.

DO YOU HAVE ANY KIDS?

AGAIN, I'M A NUN.

THAT'S MY POINT!

SEE, IT'S EASY

FOR YOU TO BE

ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY,

BUT I HAD 3 KIDS

BEFORE I WAS 25.

AND WHOSE FAULT

IS THAT?

YOURS, YOURS!

I WENT HERE,

TO THIS HIGH SCHOOL.

AND MY SENIOR YEAR,

I WAS FRUITFUL,

AND I DOTH MULTIPLIED.

AND AS I SPENT MY OWN YOUTH

RAISING CHILDREN,

ONE OF THE THINGS

THAT MAKES IT WORTHWHILE

IS THAT I GET TO DECIDE

WHAT'S RIGHT FOR THEM.

NOT YOU, BUT ME.

AND THE RAMONES

ARE ON MY SYLLABUS.

I DON'T LIKE YOUR TONE,

MR. FINNERTY.

OH, YEAH, WHAT ARE YOU

GONNA DO ABOUT IT?

YOU'RE SUSPENDED.

YOU CAN'T SUSPEND ME!

I DON'T GO HERE!

WHICH IN RETROSPECT WAS

A STUPID THING TO SAY

BECAUSE JIMMY

DOES GO THERE.

OR DID.

SO SHE SUSPENDED

JIMMY?

FOR A WEEK.

AND I KNOW

HOW TO FLUSH HIM OUT.

A WEEK, HUH?

MM-HMM.

SO THAT'S WHAT

YOU GET THESE DAYS

FOR ASSAULTING

A NUN.

AH, COME ON, DAD,

I DIDN'T ASSAULT A NUN!

WELL, WHATEVER.

I'M SURE GOD

IS PLEASED.

OH, HO HO! YEAH,

PLAY THE GOD CARD,

RIGHT.

DON'T COME NEAR ME.

HE'S GONNA STRIKE YOU DOWN.

COME ON, DAD,

GIVE ME A HUG.

GET AWAY FROM ME!

I'M YOUR ELDEST!

[BEEPING]

FIRE!

THE HOUSE

IS BURNING DOWN!

YOU ARE NOT

GOOD PARENTS!

[SMOKE ALARM BEEPING]

LET'S GIVE IT

ABOUT A MINUTE!

[BEEPING]

WHAT IS THIS?

YOU CAN'T LEAVE

THESE BOOKS OUTSIDE.

THEY'LL GET

ALL MILDEWY.

WHO PUT THEM

BACK HERE?

I DID.

WALT, WE REALLY

APPRECIATE

THE FREE SET

OF ENCYCLOPEDIAS

FROM THE DUMP.

BUT THE THING IS,

THEY'RE GONNA HAVE TO BE

OUR OUTDOOR

ENCYCLOPEDIAS.

WELL, THEY'RE

PERFECTLY GOOD.

THEY'RE FROM 1956.

I'M FROM 1947.

YOU'RE GONNA

THROW ME OUT, TOO?

IT'S TEEMING

WITH SILVERFISH!

I CAN'T BELIEVE

HE DIDN'T COME OUT.

THAT SMOKE ALARM

SHOULD HAVE WORKED.

DON'T BLAME YOURSELF.

THE IDEA WAS INSPIRED.

IT DOESN'T MAKE

ANY SENSE.

JIMMY'S AFRAID

OF EVERYTHING.

HE WEARS

HIS BICYCLE HELMET

IN THE CAR.

HE'S--HE'S A WEIRD

LITTLE DUDE.

SO IF I CAN'T

OUTTHINK HIM, AND

I CAN'T SCARE HIM,

WHAT KIND OF MOTHER

AM I?

RELAX, BABY.

YOU CAN ALWAYS

WITHHOLD AFFECTION.

WHAT HAPPENED?

EVERYTHING WAS FINE

YESTERDAY.

YOU GUYS HAD

A GOOD TIME, RIGHT?

YEAH--NO, WE HAD

A GREAT TIME YESTERDAY.

HOO HO! WE HAD

AN EXCELLENT TIME.

ALL RIGHT, WHAT'S

WITH THE "HOO HO!"

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TALK?

WHAT HAPPENED

YESTERDAY?

NOTHING, NO BIG THING.

YOU SURE YOU DON'T MIND

WATCHING JIMMY?

NO PROBLEM.

NO PROBLEMO.

HOW IS IT

YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORK

ON A TUESDAY?

I HAVE

FLEXIBLE HOURS.

ARE YOU A CRIMINAL?

NO.

MY DAD SAYS

YOU SELL BEEPERS

TO DRUG DEALERS.

WELL, NOT KNOWINGLY.

DO YOU SMOKE POT?

SEAN,

GET HER OFF ME!

LILY,

LEAVE EDDIE ALONE.

YOU'RE VERY MYSTERIOUS.

JIMMY.

HEY, YOU READY TO PARTY

WITH YOUR UNCLE EDWIN?

I WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL.

WELL, YOU CAN'T.

HEY, IT'LL BE FUN.

ME AND YOU.

WE'LL WATCH SOME TUBE,

HAVE A BITE TO EAT,

AND THEN WE'RE GONNA

GO INTO BROOKLYN

AND VISIT

THIS DUDE I KNOW, HUH?

I REALLY WANT TO GO

TO SCHOOL TODAY.

HE'S A CHINESE DUDE.

Sean: IT WAS CLEAR THAT

I COULDN'T LEAVE HIM ALONE

WITH EDDIE.

I CALLED MY BOSS TO GET

ANOTHER DAY OFF WORK.

ANOTHER DAY OFF?

BULLDOG!

THIS IS MOTHER-TALKING

BULLDOG!

WHAT THE FLIP DO YOU

THINK THIS IS, FINNERTY?

YOU THINK THE MTA IS--

UH, YOU'RE RIGHT,

SIR.

IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK?

ALL THE OTHER

MOTHER-TALKERS

GOT THEIR STINK TOGETHER.

INEXCUSABLE.

I'VE BEEN WATCHING YOU,

FINNERTY.

I'M WATCHING YOU!

HA HA!

HEY, I'M HANGING

WITH YOU GUYS TODAY.

I WANT TO GO

TO SCH--

UH-UH-UH! DON'T SAY

SCHOOL, JIMMY, OK?

'CAUSE THIS IS YOUR

SCHOOL, ALL RIGHT?

WE LIVE IN

THE GREATEST CITY

IN THE WORLD.

LOOK, THERE'S

ALL KINDS OF STUFF.

THERE'S, UH, MUSEUMS

AND HISTORICAL SITES,

THEATER.

SO WHERE ARE

WE GOING, CAPPY?

WELL...

THERE SHE IS, JIMMY.

LADY LIBERTY.

WHO PUT HER HERE?

AH, SHE WAS A PRESENT

FROM OUR BUDDIES OVER

IN FRANCE.

YEAH,

DURING THE FRENCH

AND INDIAN WAR.

THEY PRETENDED

IT WAS A GIFT,

BUT THEN

WE ACCEPTED IT

AND FRENCH SOLDIERS

JUMPED OUT OF HER

AND KICKED OUR ASS.

WHY DO YOU SAY STUFF

LIKE THAT?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHEN OUR FOREFATHERS

CAME HERE,

THAT'S THE FIRST THING

THEY SAW.

CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT

THAT MUST'VE BEEN LIKE,

AFTER WEEKS AND WEEKS

AT SEA,

TIRED AND COLD AND HUNGRY?

[WITH IRISH ACCENT]

SWEET JOSEPH, MARGARET!

I CAN'T TAKE NO MORE.

I'LL THROW MYSELF

TO THE SHARKS

BEFORE I ENDURE

ANOTHER NIGHT AT SEA.

[AS MARGARET] AY, SEAMUS.

SEAMUS! WHAT'S THAT

A-GLEAMING ON THE HORIZON?

[AS SEAMUS] 'TIS,

'TIS A GREAT IRON LASSIE,

MARGARET.

LORD HAVE MERCY!

LOOK HOW SHE BECKONS US

WITH HER TORCH HELD HIGH!

[AS MARGARET] AY, SEAMUS,

'TIS A BEAUTEOUS SIGHT.

[AS SEAMUS]

'TIS, 'TIS, MARGARET.

I CAN'T WAIT ANOTHER SECOND

BEFORE I KISS THE GROUND

BENEATH HER

GREAT GREEN FOOT!

WE'RE IN AMERICA,

MAGGIE! AMERICA AT LAST!

ISN'T "LASSIE"

SCOTTISH?

YOU SHUT YOUR GOB, MAN.

THIS WAS FRANCE'S WAY

OF TELLING POOR PEOPLE

TO COME HERE?

SEE? YOU ARE LEARNING

STUFF ALREADY.

THIS IS GONNA BE A BLAST.

I'M GONNA GO

LIE DOWN ON A BENCH.

COME ON, EDDIE!

I'M DEAD!

YOU'VE KILLED ME.

WE TOOK A NICE REST

IN THE HOOTERS,

HUH, JIMMY?

YEAH, DAD.

RIGHT IN HER HOOTERS.

WHOA.

THAT'S IT.

I QUIT SMOKING.

I'M DONE.

RACE YOU TO THE TOP.

OK.

I'LL BE UP IN A SEC.

[SIGHS] HOW YOU DOING?

WHOA. COOL VIEW,

HUH, JIMMY?

YOU CAN SEE FOR MILES.

IT'S AMAZING.

THE MAJESTY

OF OUR GREAT NATION

SPREAD OUT AT OUR FEET.

HEY, THE DUMP'S

ON FIRE.

HO HO, THAT'S

GONNA STINK.

YEAH.

LOOK HOW COOL

THE TORCH IS.

YOU WANNA GO UP THERE?

CAN WE?

FREAKING 'A RIGHT!

I'LL RACE YOU!

WHAT'S WITH ALL

THE RACING?

EXCUSE ME,

MAKING OUR WAY

TO THE TORCH.

DANKE SCHOEN.

EXCUSE ME.

MERCI. OK.

WHOA, WHAT--

WHAT'S THIS?

I'M SORRY,

THE ARM IS CLOSED

TO THE PUBLIC.

NO WAY.

WHOA, WHAT DO YOU MEAN

"CLOSED TO THE PUBLIC?"

NOBODY'S ALLOWED

UP THERE.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOBODY?

THERE'S THAT COMMERCIAL,

WITH TONY BENNETT.

HE'S SINGING ABOUT

LEMON-LIME SODA.

IT'S OK, IT'S FINE.

WE'LL JUST--

NO, NO, IT'S NOT FINE.

JIMMY, IF TONY BENNETT

GETS TO GO TO THE TORCH,

WHY CAN'T I GO?

IT'S A COMMERCIAL.

OK, LOOK, WHEN YOU

PEOPLE SAID,

LEAVE YOUR BEERS OUTSIDE,

WE DID. RIGHT?

AND WHEN YOU TOLD US

TO STOP YELLING, "ECHO,"

OK, WE STOPPED.

BUT TO DENY US

THE TORCH,

I MEAN, HOW CAN I

EXPLAIN THAT TO MY SON?

I UNDERSTAND.

OK, OK, FINE.

FINE.

SHOULD WE MAKE

OUR MOVE?

LET'S GO.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

DID YOU READ THE POEM

DOWNSTAIRS, JIMMY?

WE ARE THE HUDDLED MASSES,

AND THIS GIANT LADY

IS THE ONE PLACE

WHERE FREEDOM

SHOULD REIGN SUPREME.

YEAH, DAD. YOU KNOW,

THERE IS A SIGN.

TO THE TORCH!

AAAAH!

[ALARM BUZZES]

LOOK, THEY'RE STILL

UP THERE, MAN.

THERE'S LIKE

3 OF THEM--AAAAH!

YOU MEAN YOU'RE

NOT EVEN GONNA LOOK?

THAT'S YOUR IDEA

OF "NO BIG THING?"

HOW COULD YOU NOT

TELL ME THAT?

HE'S FINALLY DEVELOPED

A SENSE OF SHAME.

THIS IS REAL PROGRESS.

HEY! I'M NOT ASHAMED

ABOUT ANYTHING.

WE HAD A VALID POINT.

I GOT NEWS FOR ALL

YOU PEOPLE!

THAT'S NOT

THE STATUE OF

LIBERTY,

IT'S THE STATUE

OF OPPRESSION!

FIGHT THE POWER, YO!

SO NOW JIMMY'S

FREAKING OUT,

ALL 'CAUSE

YOU HAD TO GO UP

IN SOME DUMB ARM?

HEY, I'M NOT SAYING

MISTAKES WEREN'T MADE--

YOU TOLD ME JIMMY

HAD A GOOD TIME!

HE DID!

YOU HAVE TO LOOK

AT THE WHOLE DAY.

OH, YOU ARE AMAZING.

'CAUSE YOU COULD

LIE TO ME--

[ALL ARGUING]

JIMMY?

JIMMY,

WHERE WERE YOU?

SCHOOL.

YOU WERE KICKED OUT

OF SCHOOL.

I SNUCK BACK IN.

YOU RAN AWAY

TO SCHOOL?

YEAH. THEY CAUGHT HIM

IN THE LIBRARY

READING A BOOK.

FREAK.

I NEVER COULD HAVE

FOUND YOU THERE, BUDDY.

JIMMY, COME ON!

WE WERE TRYING

TO MAKE A POINT.

THERE ARE PRINCIPLES

AT STAKE HERE.

YOU KNOW,

I'M NOT LIKE YOU AND

UNCLE EDDIE, DAD.

I DON'T LIKE GETTING

ARRESTED FOR STUFF.

HO HO--WE WEREN'T

ARRESTED.

WE WERE ADMONISHED,

THEN ESCORTED.

WHEN CAN I JUST

GO BACK TO SCHOOL?

OK, I'LL WRITE

ANOTHER NOTE

TO SISTER HELEN.

OH, YEAH, THAT'LL HELP.

A DIFFERENT KIND

OF NOTE.

IT'S ABOUT TIME

YOU APOLOGIZED

TO THAT GOOD NUN.

DROP TROU

AND BEND OVER.

YOU KNOW,

I'M NOT GONNA DO THIS

WITH HIM HERE.

WALT, COULD YOU GO

IN THE OTHER ROOM,

PLEASE?

OK, LOOK! THERE HE IS!

I CAN SEE HIM!

OH, COME ON!

YOU GUYS.

"DEAR SISTER HELEN,

"THOUGH I STILL

CONSIDER YOU

TO BE IN THE WRONG--"

NO!

"THOUGH YOU FAIL--"

NUH-UH!

"DEAR SISTER HELEN,

I AM A FLAMING IDIOT."

THAT I LIKE.

DAD, LEAVE! LEAVE NOW!

COME WITH ME.

PLEASE?

UM, SATURN.

OK.

ALL RIGHT,

THERE YOU GO.

UH, WE'RE GONNA

NEED THE RINGS

FOR THAT ONE. HENRY?

[MUFFLED]

I DON'T

HAVE THEM.

SPIT THEM

OUT.

OK.

AND THEN THERE'S OLD

BLUE MARBLE EARTH,

AND THE MOON.

WHAT HAVE WE

LEARNED ABOUT

THE MOON?

[SIGHS] LET'S SEE...

"SOMEDAY, SCIENTISTS

HOPE TO BUILD A ROCKET

THAT CAN TAKE MAN

TO THE MOON."

ALL RIGHT,

THAT ENCYCLOPEDIA

IS OUT OF HERE.