Original subtitles

A long time ago, millions of miles out in space,

a wandering asteroid took aim at the Yucatan Peninsula.

The mass extinction that followed

killed 80% of the plant and animal life on Earth,

and is called the KT Event.

It meant the end of the dinosaurs,

and the creation of the Yucatan cenote,

and the birth of the modern tomato.

Tiny black berries of the tomato plant

evolved to survive.

Eventually, humans intervened.

Domesticated tomatoes grew even larger,

but more and more dependent on humans for survival.

Europeans arrived and didn't have a word for them.

They took the Mayan word "tomate,"

meaning swelling, fat, water fruit.

It was the size of a--

Oh, my gosh. It must be Derrick.

Oh, my God.

Haley, what happened?

TARA, turn down the music.

Sure thing.

Volume decreasing.

Whoa, nice 'do.

So gorgeous.

Stop it.

Wait, did that tomato just talk?

Oh, yeah. Brand new.

My Tomato does everything short of washing your cat.

Guys, we're in sunny San Diego.

How bad can a storm be, right?

Something's at the door.

Go, go, go, go, go.

Go, go.

Oh, my God.

Come back.

Come back.

Where is that damn app?

Lock, unlock!

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

A tomato ate my sister!

Thank God they made it out safe.

But we have other problems.

Those guys?

I'm telling you, Admiral, those guys just deliver pizza.

Sifuentes, do they look like pizza delivery guys to you?

Launch the drone.

By the way, I picked up a My Tomato.

Pardon the mess.

Damn it.

No plugins, no batteries, completely organic.

It says it learns the house as it grows.

Like artificial intelligence.

Only freakier.

Imagine your phone, but with living, breathing brain cells.

Even worse, it was grown by VegIntel.

But who are these guys?

Sifuentes, that's need to know.

Tomatoes?

It's my worst nightmare.

The secret FBI meeting

in the Interagency Knowledge and Education Alcove

will begin shortly.

I believe you would be wise

to focus on the infamous Dr. Nicholas Mortimer Gangreen.

You all know Marina Sifuentes.

How do you do? How do you do?

Watch your-- watch your foot.

Excuse me and allow me to introduce myself formally.

I am known as AI Ansible, the world's most advanced

artificial intelligence.

Ladies and gentlemen, Doctor Amazing Balls--

how do we stop these tomatoes?

If I may, Admiral Grant, almost 50 years ago,

there was a similar tomato uprising.

Ultimately, it was discovered that

the pop song "Puberty Love" caused the tomatoes

to recoil and shrink.

Then, crowds of people stomped the shit out of them.

Great.

- Let's just do that. - Yeah.

Unfortunately, we cannot.

Indeed.

The song's puerility has lost its effectiveness.

What you're about to see is top secret footage

of a tomato attack from 1978.

Following this incident, the government

confiscated the documentary footage

that caught this attack on film.

A government sponsored PR campaign promoted the movie

as a comedy-- a comedy so bad

that no one would take it,

or the idea of killer tomatoes, seriously.

We know all this.

We're the ones who did it.

This plan appeared to have worked.

Hardly anyone saw the movie.

The public has no recollection of the traumatic events

of 1978, and the uprising was stomped out.

See what I did there?

It was stomped out, just as the tomatoes were stomped--

Where are you going?

What's happening?

What is that, a pantsuit?

Why are you crawling on the table?

Gangreen is behind this.

He wants terror in every boardroom and government

office-- probably the DMV too.

You're not listening to me.

Hi, I'm TARA.

Welcome to VegIntel.

I'm Doctor Kate Patelle, Adolescent Prodigy

and Creator of My Tomato.

Our safe, organic, bioneural network

uses nature to perform everyday tasks

while keeping your communications out

of the hands of AI bots, scammers, and predators.

Make sure you go home to the safety of a My Tomato.

Mr. Press Secretary, might I ask,

where is our executive order?

Well, work faster.

There's a fortune to be made replacing those government

answer balls with My Tomatoes.

Dimitri, call the coast and tell them

I want the sales reports on my desk at 8:17 tonight.

And I don't mean 8:16 or 8:18.

8:17.

Which coast?

All of them.

Oh, excuse me.

Just let me get you your coffee here.

A paper straw?

I want my straw.

There you are.

Watson, get me another.

Oh, my name's not--

One team, one name.

You are all Watson.

Madam.

Top secret footage of a tomato attack from 1978.

We know all this.

We're the ones who did it.

Sacré bleu!

What are you guys up to?

Abuela, our team entered that house minutes after these

guys left.

And everything was as clean as a whistle.

You see that body?

10 minutes later, that woman walked out of the house,

good as new.

You've known the answer since you were a little girl.

Your dreams are your murderboard, Mija.

Admiral Grant isn't telling me everything.

Many centuries ago, the great goddess of the moon,

with a single furious blow, ended the dinosaurs

and created los cenotes that bring us fresh water,

the fertility of the Earth and serve as our gateway

to the afterlife.

Gel!

Gel! Look right away.

It got my arm.

Great Whites prefer cooler waters

and rarely come so close to shore.

For the bazillionth time, quit calling me Gel.

Wow.

You're really no fun at all, are you, Angela?

Everything looks fine down there.

You got healthy and happy mama babies.

So when are we going to harvest them?

Carbon absorption needs to get better

and better, which is great.

But I'm still hearing that low octave grumble.

I can feel the bass from that concert down there.

Maybe they can too.

Right.

Tomatoes that grumble to music.

There's a reason why you're the diver and I'm the scientist.

Yeah, cause you can't swim.

Look, whatever you're hearing, it's probably

just in your instruments--

static and stuff.

Or you got that, what do you call it,

that ear ringing thing--

I got a dope audiologist I can hook you up with.

Sometimes it's just earwax.

No big deal.

I love being out here.

What happened to you?

Move over.

I'm driving.

Look, if you just let me

teach you how to swim, you go down there and check on it.

Why'd VegIntel put you on aquaculture, anyway?

Check the audio and tell me I'm not crazy.

Man.

Ah!

Abuela, I'm going to meet the Admiral.

I can't do this anymore.

I keep being haunted by my nightmares.

Would the captain of the destroyer

please move your ship?

You're parked in the submarine zone.

Sifuentes.

Admiral, I'm headed to rendezvous Alpha 7.

Please meet me there in 10 minutes.

Sifuentes, we've been through this.

We need to talk--

30 minutes.

Sir?

Admiral Grant, I'm on a deadline.

Sir, there's been new incidents of killer tomatoes.

Killer torndaoes?

Sir, I think that's a movie.

I said tomatoes-- killer tomatoes.

Whatever it is.

I'll tell you what, let's just add it to the agenda

for the Congressional UFO hearings.

Good?

I know you've got questions.

I don't have these answers.

Luckily, we do have the Secretary of Energy here.

Madam Secretary, will you please come up here

and take their questions?

Why haven't we junked these things for the My Tomato yet?

We're close on organic intelligence,

but still not quite ready.

Bullshit.

The campaign is launched.

We've already sold millions of home versions.

TARA, run the footage from the beach house.

As you wish, Miss Patel.

Dimitri, look at this.

Now, run that again in slow motion.

Look at that.

Look at what?

That's not a random action.

Our My Tomatoes can only communicate

through Gangreen's TARA network.

But those tomatoes are communicating directly,

peer to peer.

If we could get our tomatoes to work together without TARA,

we'd cut Gangreen out altogether.

He'd be as obsolete as Answer Ball over there.

Do you know what elephants, whales,

and tomatoes all have in common?

Infrasonic communication.

Turn that thing off.

More news-- our monitors have detected escaping inventory.

Tomatoes appear to have reached the surface on their own.

Very good, Dimitri.

Kate, there she is.

Did you see the video I sent?

It's astounding. Who's your source?

Admiral Grant.

I don't think much of it, but I thought you might.

No, you're right.

Nothing unusual.

So might we be looking at a big day soon for My Tomato?

You have no idea.

But I need that executive order.

Yeah, I'm working on it.

Listen, I got to go.

Very busy, got a lot of paperwork here--

really piling up.

I want to meet our young marine biologist immediately.

Already sent for.

Sir, I'm sorry, but you know as well

as anybody that these killer tomatoes

have been around forever.

At ease, Admiral.

Now you sound like a conspiracy nut.

I'll just leave this one to the spin room.

Gotta run.

Admiral, thanks for meeting me.

Sifuentes, what is so damn important?

Why didn't you tell me about the movie cover-ups?

Quiet, quiet.

There's ears everywhere.

Anyway, that was all on a need-to-know basis.

Really?

You know my family.

If anybody needs to know, it's me.

The paratrooper, the scuba guy,

the old lady in the wheelchair--

they're all the same people

from those old movies, aren't they?

What happened to trust?

It's not a matter of trust, Sifuentes.

Sometimes lies live so long

that simply telling the truth is treason.

You owe it to my parents.

I didn't get this job by accident.

Or did you just hire me out of guilt?

You were hired because you were the most

qualified person for the job.

But you are asking me to reveal secrets

that run so deep that the presidents

don't even know about them.

Why all the secrecy?

Can you imagine the panic in the world

if people knew their own vegetables could kill them?

At first, we thought we could eat our way out of this.

But, no.

Innocent people are playing games with tomatoes.

We don't know the kind of danger they could be spreading.

OK, OK, OK.

The paratrooper, Wilbur Finletter,

he was the original commander of the FBI Strike Force.

But, after some years, the government cut them loose.

And then your parents, they hooked him up

with some centuries-old secret tomato

watch organization.

I know more about him than you might think.

But what about Gangreen?

Gangreen?

Gangreen is a nut job.

Gangreen is not a problem.

The problem is Kate Patelle and her My Tomato crap.

Well, maybe it's time we bring in your Wilbur Finletter,

convince him that he needs our help.

Sam Smith, he's your key for that.

Oh, yes.

You'll find him at the Barrel Roll Bar any day of the week.

But do not tell him I sent you.

Say that you're there on behalf of the White House.

Yo, what is up, you guys?

The internet is freaking out about these so-called tomato

attacks, but I want to hear it straight from the people.

So I'm coming to you live from the streets.

That's embarrassing.

What the--

Woo!

Oh, oh, oh.

Hey, how about a taste of your own medicine, kid?

Whoa, whoa.

Easy does it, bro.

Scram.

I can't believe we got invited to meet Kate Patelle.

Boss babe in person.

Don't call her that.

It's disrespectful.

Tuck in your shirt.

That tomato was actually kind of good.

Ever wondered how a My Tomato works?

It all starts with the TARA network.

TARA is a miracle of modern organic intelligence.

Now, she serves as the central communication node

in our network of sentient tomatoes.

With synthetic biogenetics, when the world profits,

we profit.

I think I have an ethical obligation to tell her

about the grumbling.

We are meeting the Kate Patelle in person.

I'm not going to start off by lying to her.

You're crazy, Gel.

I mean, you've proven you can grow a vegetable with no soil

and no fresh water.

To me, that sounds like the very definition

of VegIntel Organics.

Those grumbling sounds must mean something.

Stop calling me Gel.

The data just hit my phone.

Your inventory count was short again.

Don't worry about that.

They're probably just on the bottom of the bay.

Or they swam away on their own.

Call of the wild.

Yeah, swam away.

No, for real, though, these tomato attacks are mental.

Check this out-- authorities say there's no evidence

this ever happened.

It's just another hoax.

But, in seriousness, if you or anyone you know

has been affected by these tomato attacks,

don't forget to smash that Like and Subscribe button.

All right.

Mental.

Another one.

And one for my friend here.

Hello.

I'm going to get me some of this.

Hey, gorgeous.

Are you sunburnt?

Are you always this hot?

My nose.

You knocked off my nose.

The White House said I could find you here.

You're being called back to active duty.

I'm through.

Kaput.

You can take your experimental jet--

And you must be?

Sir Elton John.

And who told you to look for me here, love?

Drop the routine, and I'll tell you.

That's a peanut.

Sam Smith, master of disguise.

And attorney at law.

Uh-huh.

Admiral Grant said I could find you.

I'm a real lawyer.

I'm sure you're a credit to the profession.

Let's go.

Oh, there it is.

My nose.

Oh, that's an olive.

Call me.

Really?

Everybody deserves representation.

I feel a sea breeze today.

Look, I've been told that you can connect me

with the original FBI Strike Force.

That strike force was disbanded decades ago.

Well, I need them to un-disband.

Boss isn't going to want to work with you.

Answers to a higher power now.

Well, then it's a good thing the Admiral wants him.

Oh, Admiral Grant.

I would suggest you leave that part out of your pitch.

Whatever happened between him and the Admiral, anyway?

The whole movie scam was his idea.

Brass decided to shut down the whole task force

along with Area 57--

ruined our careers.

Frank got a promotion.

The rest of us had to make other connections.

What's Area 57?

Wait, wait, wait.

You just said "we" had to have other connections.

I thought you were practicing law now.

Law is just a side gig.

Truth is, you never really leave, to be honest.

Too many secrets.

Finletters Pizza.

Oh, you even have a menu.

Oh, gee.

Secret club-- do you guys have a secret handshake, too?

Needs to know work both ways.

Hi. Welcome to VegIntel.

So sorry, Miss Patelle's in back-to-back meetings.

Can I get you any coffee while you wait?

Can't.

IBS.

That's irritable bowel syndrome.

Ew.

Hi.

You've reached VegIntel.

All of us are working from home,

and there is no one here to take your call.

Wow.

Jasmine, check out that giant tomato.

It doesn't look organic, Josh.

I think he's after our compost.

Oh, no.

He's got little Bobby.

Poor Bobby.

That's a drag.

I just finished paying for his karate lessons.

Yeah, well, they didn't help.

♪ I don't have plans and schemes ♪

♪ And I don't have ♪

I have one large pepperoni.

Finletters Pizza, what can I get you?

What?

Pineapple? On a pizza?

What are you, nuts?

What can I get you?

Yo, pops, you take Venmo?

No, man. Cash only.

Cash App?

Zelle?

Look, kid, no newfangled high tech gobbledygook

substitutions for good old American greenbacks, OK?

So you either pony up something with dead presidents

on it, or no pizza.

Guy wants a dead president?

What's the world coming to, man?

Pardon me, but do you happen to have any singing zebras?

No, but we do have peanut butter and gummy bear pizza.

Your uncle needs you.

Colburn, Irene, in the back.

I haven't dipped into this inventory in years.

Kind of musty in here.

We got to get this place cleaned out.

So, what's going on?

Let me guess, our old friends are worried.

Looks like it.

Yeah, well, not thrilled about all the public attention,

but we're on it.

It's under control.

Not as far as Washington's concerned.

They got video of you the other night.

Things got a little messy.

They asked me to bring the team in.

How about you tell them to just go

make another fake movie?

Or, better yet, they could just re-release one of the ones

they already shot that nobody saw.

Come on, come on.

Wilbur-- Wilbur, this might be a bit of kismet.

Someone did this before us, and someone's

got to do it after us.

The hell are you talking about, Irene?

We can't do this forever.

We could use some new blood.

Just take a meeting.

You don't hear anything you like, you go home.

I smell my favorite Admiral.

Just take one meeting.

All right. Shut her down, people.

We got a gig.

Yes.

There we go.

Come on.

Leave those aprons here, though.

You better hope a food critic doesn't show up.

I've been waiting 50 years to get this place written up.

Hello?

Oh, well.

Hi.

I am so excited to meet you.

I've read all of your cover stories so many times--

Wired, Forbes,

even that Page Six hit piece couldn't steal your shine.

Oh, I'm aware of my fabulosity.

Dimitri, how fabulous am I?

Mondo fab.

Now, dispense with the flattery

and show me your findings.

So growth rates are exceeding expectation, which is strange

given that these tomatoes were cloned from

a slow growing Yucatan variety.

Our working theory is that the underwater sound waves

may be influencing their behavior.

Behavior?

They make sounds, grumbles.

If you look at this clip right here,

you can even see that the tomatoes vibrate in sync.

The science, it's pretty complicated.

So?

She's a genius.

She is a--

you are a genius.

OK, so this--

Whatever is happening,

saltwater farming could save billions

of gallons of fresh water.

I've seen quite enough.

All right.

Do I need to remind you of your confidentiality agreement?

No?

Bye bye.

Thank you for your time.

So nice to meet you.

Well, you freaked them out, Gel.

Most people want to hear the truth.

That has not been my experience.

What's the deal with these guys?

I don't think they know what they got.

They're just focused on saving the planet.

Well, let's make sure they don't do that

before we can make money off of it.

All right, well, I'll find some place

to put those two where we can keep an eye on them.

Better, I'll volunteer their services

to our government partners.

Meantime, see what you can do to keep

Sifuentes out of our hair.

Hello, Kate the Great.

Caught me in the middle of a workout, but I'll allow it.

How's my favorite captain of industry?

Tell me all about the world of bio-orgy genetics.

My Tomato is selling like hotcakes.

I'm even cranking up My Tomato 2.0

to clear inventory and cover your ass.

What's behind schedule is your government contract.

Patience is its own reward, sweetheart.

Why don't you leave the timing to me?

I'm sending you some reinforcement,

two of my best scientists.

I need you to cut through the red tape,

get them cleared, and placed with your government meatheads.

That's actually clever.

You might make it in the big leagues after all.

Just keep me in the loop.

You'll be my first call, butter cake.

Dimitri, I need everyone on this.

Grab those underwater tomatoes and slice them and dice them

until you squeeze every last strand of DNA for analysis.

Slice and dice.

All right, I'm going to take this one alone.

You go perform a routine recon.

Pick me up here at 2100 hours.

The Interagency Knowledge and

Education Alcove will begin the top secret

FBI meeting momentarily.

You must be the fabled Wilbur Fuddrucker.

It's Finletter.

And you must be the unknown agent--

Sifuentes.

Interesting uniform you've got there.

This uniform has seen me through many tough times,

but you already knew that.

I'm not sure what I know anymore.

Tell me about that patch.

This patch, I got it for valor under combat--

the tomato uprising of '78.

Yeah, my grandmother showed me one.

Agh, my nuts.

My parents were killed in the war.

Your father was major Miguel Alberto Juarez De Los Santos

Garcia Hernandez Sifuentes De La Casa De Fuerte.

I heard all about the war from my grandmother.

Your mother and father were great and honorable soldiers,

but they were also--

In fact, my mother recruited you on her deathbed.

And I've seen the movies.

That documentary was intended to tell the public the truth.

Mmhmm.

The guardians have monitored the tomatoes for centuries.

The sequels, the cartoons, pitiful contrivances.

Screw the movies.

I assume my mother chose you for a reason.

In honor of your mother and father,

I'm willing to give this partnership a shot.

Look,

part of my job is establishing

a chain of command.

"Partner" isn't in our vernacular.

That's fine.

On paper, you can have all the commands you like.

But in the field, my crew follows my orders.

Fair enough.

However, if you step out of line,

I'll see to it that you and your crew are retired for good.

Wait, what do you mean?

Like executed or literally retired?

Literally retired.

We're already retired.

Then I mean executed.

We can live with that.

But first, I need you to read aloud this request

for services form.

I'm not reading that.

All right, well, then, I'll just give you your copy.

It's recommended you keep it in your paperwork.

- We don't have to have copies. - No, it's OK.

I'll sign it and date it.

And then that way I'll know--

No, because it's all--

I gotta go.

And I just-- do you have a pen?

Mysterioso.

It doesn't make any sense, Gel.

I mean, Patelle practically throws us out of her office,

and now we're on some special assignment

to the FBI, whatever that means.

I'm pretty sure this is the right address.

Something smells off.

Yeah, you stepped in dog poop.

You must be Chip and Dale.

Oh, it's Chad and Angela.

You're agent Sifuentes?

The brains and muscle, huh?

Just so you know, it wasn't my idea to bring you in.

And I have no idea how you got clearance.

He wasn't my idea, either.

He's Kate Patelle's muscle, not mine.

How do you know I wasn't the brains?

'Cause you're not.

I could be the brains.

Looks like nobody's here.

Weird.

Welcome to my laboratory.

Gangreen, you're working here?

I came with the castle.

How's Romania?

I'm still there.

The miracle of technology, my young lad.

I was alerted when you entered my lab.

Feel free to look around.

Cool.

So you're the Doctor Gangreen?

You do experiments on vegetables?

Well, a little work on other vegetables,

like those carrots.

But this is how tomatoes settle.

So, doc, have you tried a bacterial synthetic genome

or saltwater infusion?

I see the whipped cream, but where's the hot chocolate?

Funny you should mention water.

Take a look at that tomato on the table.

If I didn't know better, I'd think that tomato

was dehydrating the plant.

Oh, my gosh.

Uh, guys!

Just another red mess looking to sap

our precious bodily fluids.

Doctor Gangreen, we're being attacked.

Come again?

We're being attacked.

Watch whose cat?

Attacked!

Oh.

I'm sure you're in no danger.

They're just friendly hugs.

Angela, I think you could be of great help

in analyzing the data.

Look in my desk drawer.

There is a temporary access card to the lab.

But, just to be clear, your work is exclusively

on this isolated computer.

No internet, no remote access?

That's right.

This information could never leave the castle.

Oh, professor.

The lunch buffet is starting.

Mmm.

Monte Cristo sandwiches.

Ta ta, science people.

That was weird.

Last night, tomato attacks were reported in New Orleans--

--Tokyo,

Milan.

Authorities attribute the incidents to unusual weather

patterns or UFOs.

Finletter.

Incident at Fallbrook Road.

Got it. Fallbrook Road.

We got activity, let's go.

You take the van.

I'll meet you there.

But Sifuentes is on her way.

She's bringing two new team members to meet.

She and the government are going to have to wait.

This is a Guardians 911.

This poor woman was dehydrated to death.

Looks to me like tomatoes.

Only one way to find out for sure, sheriff.

Oh, gross.

That's blood.

That's tomato juice.

Well, good thing we didn't step in it.

Not moving fast enough.

Barely got to that poor girl at the beach house

on time and too late to do rehydration or cleanup here.

Local cops beat us.

It's not good.

Where's Wilbur?

Oh!

Sorry I'm late.

I forgot my phone.

It's like the boomers forgot to lock the front door.

Maybe there's somebody in the back.

Smells like they also forgot to turn off the microwave.

That's just how boomers smell.

So, Marina, exactly what government agency

do you belong to?

Oh, do you know Nunya?

Nunya business.

That's not very nice.

No way.

Tomato voodoo doll?

Oh.

Did you know they used to grow babies in space?

Shut up.

Tit Tat and rainbow Skitters.

That's my favorite.

Wait, how's this thing work?

Somewhere to insert, swipe, tap, scan?

What the?

Whoa.

Does this mean I can't get rainbow Skitters?

Wait, are we trespassing?

We're for sure trespassing.

A tomato speakeasy?

Come on.

What?

So let me get this straight--

the disappearance of Atlantis, the eruption of Pompeii,

and the Hindenburg crash were all--

Tomatoes.

All tomatoes.

Attack of the killer tomatoes.

Attack--

Oh, my God, Chad.

What? Come on.

It's a classic.

- We're working. - Well, it's a classic.

I have it on my Should've Won An Oscars movie playlist.

What's that?

What's that?

It's a crazy thing.

They're back.

Turn that off.

Everyone, out.

Out.

Well, who are these two?

Don't blame me.

Orders from above.

Seriously, Irene, tell me,

just why do we need more pencil pushers?

I say we give them a chance, chief.

It's nice to have another woman on the team.

Any of you knit?

No.

I do-- a little.

What? There's a lot of hurry up and wait in the SEALs.

SEALs?

Yes, sir.

All right, Sam, look, I'll admit,

these kids have compelling backstories,

but we don't need them.

All right, you'll be hearing from me, big guy.

All right. How's the weather down there?

Just fine.

Good day, Mama Smurf.

Those old people are wildly offensive.

Getting kind of hungry.

Maybe we should go get some food.

What? We just left the pizza shop.

Should we go back?

What the-- shots fired--

Go, go.

It's the Wild West out here.

You can let go now.

Yeah, OK.

That was no random street shooting.

I think somebody tried to kill you.

I just got a message from Kate Patelle.

She wants me and Chad in her office now.

Right.

I can watch my own six.

You two get out of here.

Stay low.

Low, low, low, low.

Even the mere mention of the word

is sufficient to induce panic.

Tomato.

Hi, I'm Kate Patelle, CEO and Founder of VegIntel Organics.

Our new My Tomato can provide 24-hour tomato detection

and security services.

So effective you won't even know it's there.

And kids will love the new fuzzy tomato plush.

Have a seat.

You sent for us?

Do you know how I got to be in this office?

Elevator.

Funny guy, Watson.

I got here by being the toughest SOB in the room.

I never took no for an answer.

Isn't that right, Dimitri?

Have I ever taken no for an answer?

Yeah-- no. No.

No.

It's no.

Here's the thing--

certain people in the government

aren't happy about the progress of our research.

Anyone famous?

Let's just say they are a lot higher up in the government

than who you're working with.

Man, that blows.

Doctor Gangreen says he's making progress.

According to my calculations, he just says that to protect

his cushy government contract.

As usual, your feeble AI brain cannot compute.

Doctor Gangreen is gathering necessary information,

you clinking, clanking, clattering

collection of caliginous junk.

Doctor Gangreen is world renowned.

In fact, he has his own action figure.

Have you shared any of your research with them?

No, but Doctor Gangreen is working on the DNA

of a particular strain of tomatoes

that we've been experimenting with.

And he plans to call on me to help with the analysis.

I'm not sure we have time for that.

I need every scrap of data the government has collected.

No time to waste.

Have you just asked them for it?

Too much red tape.

That's why you're on my team, Watson.

Therefore-- therefore--

You want us to steal it.

Steal it?

Of course not.

We're all working together.

I just need you to copy the data

so my team, including Angela,

can look at it and see how we can help.

I don't know, man.

I'm not big on betraying my own teammates.

First, you're on my team.

Second, I didn't say anything about betraying anyone.

We're all just trying to save the world.

Be nice to do that on time.

I'm a scientist, not a burglar.

Of course I can find someone else to do this.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

No, we can actually do it.

We can handle it.

Fantastic.

I knew I could count on you.

Just give us a couple of days.

24 hours.

No, 23 hours.

And I want everything on those computers

and every scrap of paper, binder,

and notepad you set your eyes on.

Goodbye.

Meeting over.

Thanks for coming.

Actually going to break into Gangreen's computer?

Of course not.

I was just playing along until we could buy time

to figure out what to do.

Look, I know Kate is super smart,

but being smart is overrated.

We need to be careful.

Yeah, but I really don't want to let Kate down, though.

I mean, I do have the access card to Gangreen's lab.

OK, Gel, and here's what you do--

you go in at night, you act like you're

supposed to be there.

You wear something dark.

You bring a mask.

And if they catch you, you put the mask on, you run like hell.

A mask?

Yep.

Stop calling me "Gel."

She did have a point about the urgency, though--

saving the planet and all.

Do you compost?

You want them followed?

No, no.

We have bigger tofu to fry.

Have our people replicated Angela's tomato behavior yet?

Yeah.

About that-- Angela's hydroponic tomato farm

disappeared before we could get to it.

The equipment, the tomatoes, the data, all gone.

Crap on a low fat, gluten free cracker.

It's Gangreen.

He stole Angela's experiment right out of the bay.

He cares more about those damn tomatoes than our success.

We need that data.

Like that shirt, Colburn.

Really makes your eyes pop.

All right, let's get down to brass tacks here.

We got significant tomato activity in Sector 3

all along here.

They seem to be assembling some sort of encampment.

Encampment?

You mean like marshmallows,

horseback rides, and tomato sack races?

That would be nice.

But I was thinking more like the Southern Coast

of England June 5, 1944.

Where's Sifuentes?

Ah.

Getting shot at was the highlight of my day.

Oh, should we stop, and you can

just tell us about your day?

Let's keep going.

Don't pay no mind.

All right, listen, it's time for individual sorties here.

So, Colburn, Sam, prepare to deploy in the next 24 hours.

Colburn, I need you to assess all the public transportation

lines in this area.

Sam, dust off your old tomato disguise.

I want a nighttime infiltration of that camp.

I need you to look, act, and smell like a tomato.

Yes, sir.

No questions.

I said "no questions."

All right, thank you for your patience.

Good afternoon.

It's been a busy day at the White House.

All right, number one, we are confirming sightings

of so-called killer tomatoes.

But, as you can see, they're target balloons.

Both US and British navies have intercepted

these tomatoes before they got near or in American airspace.

And, to be certain, we have shot down every red balloon

in US airspace.

OK, issue number two-- we are confirming

we have identified vulnerabilities

to electromagnetic pulses in our answer balls.

The president is signing an executive order to replace

all AI devices with My Tomato.

All right.

Busy, busy.

I'd love to take questions, but duty calls.

Look, we got a computer.

Bought it on UBid, delivered in 15 minutes.

Cool.

Oh, and I bought something for you as well.

These two toy cats, they were delivered with the computer.

Aren't they cute?

One for you and one for me.

You got to prepare yourself properly.

Have you ever taken a gazpacho plunge?

I can't say I have.

Is this a--

Oh, I didn't know the head came off.

So tonight, when you go home, I want you to strip naked--

OK.

--dunk your genitals in a jar of salsa.

Well, don't lose it.

You might be able to make use of it.

Thanks, Irene.

Mild or spicy?

You don't have to worry about it.

I'm just looking out for him.

We all have to do our part, don't we, dear?

Yeah, it hurts.

Thanks.

I'll keep it safe.

I think these guys have had a few too

many tomato sauce bottles, if you know what I mean.

I have to go home and, uh,

wash my cat.

I'll see you two in the morning.

We all have to do our part.

Your cat?

She has a cat?

Good Girl Scout-- always prepared.

Badass Girl Scout.

Yum.

Yum.

Oh, my God.

Whipped cream rehydrates?

Mask.

Home sweet laboratory.

That is a long balloon ride from Romania.

Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on,

come on, come on, come on, come on.

Yes.

My carrots!

Who's there?

Ah!

No!

We need to meet up with Sam.

He owes me a briefing.

Did Angela get caught up with her cat grooming?

I'm actually a little worried about that.

Damn.

I thought we got rid of that guy.

Stay there.

Don't move.

Hey.

Dick.

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

That's a cool bow.

Oh, thanks.

Expensive?

No.

Got it on sale.

That ski mask is probably mighty hot

in conditions like this.

Tell me about it.

It's like a sauna under this thing.

Run.

Run.

No, you-- oh, OK.

Run.

What's up, dude?

You again?

Hey, that hat's, like, my whole identity, bro.

Hey, hey, hey.

Whoa.

Um, um.

Oh.

Tomato juice. Tomato juice.

Tomato juice.

It was worth a try.

Night, night, hooray.

My apologies.

I thought it was a tomato.

You get it.

Your father, I am not.

Heirloom, this is Roma.

Red Browndy has landed.

Hey, you all right?

Yeah.

You know, you're pretty good on terra firma

for a swim instructor.

I guess I just flashed back to my days in the service.

Felt good.

Felt that way every day as a SEAL.

Why did you get out?

No choice.

I was on a mission that went fubar.

Spent a whole year in the hospital just watching movies.

You really think this is the real deal?

'Cause I've seen those killer tomato movies,

and they're pretty ridiculous--

especially that fried green one.

I mean, what was that about?

It was a cover-up designed to keep people quiet.

Hold on.

Yeah, talk to me.

Sifuentes,

Meet me at the pier.

I'll be right there.

They just captured a giant tomato.

I need to see this.

Let's go.

No, you stay right here.

What if you need me?

I won't.

I love the smell of ketchup in the morning.

Smells like victory.

Had a bit of a skirmish here last night, Sifuentes.

Suffered many casualties, but, fortunately,

we captured one of the bastards.

This, God help us, is a wild cherry tomato.

I've never seen one that big.

Keep your mouth shut, stump.

It gets even worse--

Gangreen called, he said someone broke into his office

last night.

They may have gotten into his computer.

I don't know why you trust that guy.

I don't.

But he wouldn't be the first double agent

to prove useful to us.

Any idea who broke in?

I wish I could tell you, but HR regulations prohibit them

from telling me the age, race, gender, religious affiliation,

or disability of the culprit.

However, video surveillance has proven that whoever it was

was wearing a Popeye mask.

I know exactly who that is.

That's right, spinach breath.

Where the hell have you been?

I've been worried sick about you.

I've got the data.

I've got it all.

Wait, you stole from Gangreen's lab?

Yeah. The file took forever.

A tomato got my arm.

But I saved it with whipped cream.

And then a carrot jumped onto the keyboard.

It was 6 feet tall.

I almost choked to death.

And then Gangreen was closing in, and a tomato attack.

And then Gangreen ran right past me,

and then I put on my mask, and I escaped,

and the alarms went off.

And I fought off the guards.

And then I used a phone cable to zip line across the moat.

It snapped.

I fell into the moat with the alligators, punching alligators

in the face, and then punched one in the nuts,

and then uppercutted one, then I chokeslammed one.

And we almost became friends.

And then we became enemies again.

And-- - What?

I did it all, right down to the mask.

Wait, that was you that stole the Popeye--

I was just being a jerk.

But you thought I was being--

that is awesome, Gel.

You rock.

And the whipped cream, too, huh?

And I swam across the moat.

Oh, my God.

I stole from the government.

I'm going to prison.

Don't worry about that.

Kate will be impressed.

We have a meeting with her tomorrow, B-T-dubs.

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ They'll run you and your mama and roast for lunch ♪

All the lab's data is on this thumb drive.

And that's every piece of physical intel I could grab.

You brought me frisbees?

Don't.

You're stronger than that.

No, you're not.

No, you're not.

Is this Popeye?

You traitor.

Popeye, what?

Gangreen found this in his lab.

So did you or did you not steal his research data?

No.

As a matter of fact, I can say unequivocally

that I absolutely, personally did no such thing.

So, then, it was you?

How much money did she pay you?

Or were you all in on this from the beginning?

Agent Sifuentes, I think you are jumping to conclusions.

Well, Kate Patelle.

I suspected these two were up to no good.

So I recorded our last encounter.

TARA, please play my meeting with these two.

And send a complimentary link to our friend, Miss Sifuentes.

Wait, wait, I'm not done with you yet.

I wish we could get access to the government research.

If we put our data together, maybe we could

solve this tomato threat.

Then why don't we just steal it?

Yeah.

We should have no problem getting the information

from those fools.

We steal stuff all the time.

I can't support an idea like that.

Theft is objectively wrong.

"Theft is objectively wrong."

- Is it? - It's wrong.

Ahh.

Wrong!

We didn't say that.

What the hell, Patelle?

That's so totally bogus.

- Bogus? - Yeah.

Do you have another recording of that meeting?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

OK, that's totally ridiculous.

Listen to me, you give me three seconds with Doctor Balls

over there, that tomato from hell, and I will have you--

Angela, Chad, your employment here is terminated.

Watson, escort them out.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You-- sorry, yeah, you got to get out.

Today, tomato attacks

continue around the world.

From Cleveland and Boise to Taipei and Saigon,

the red menaces continue their rampage.

On the domestic front, the United States Armed Forces

are mobilizing every available resource.

Conflicts between AI and OI systems

have led the military to press its most fearsome

fighting force into duty--

veterans.

Now, the US Navy is planning a counterattack at any minute.

So Grant and Marina will take up positions

at this observation point.

Come in here.

She's not here.

So I take it Marina told you?

It was all my fault. What was I thinking?

First time in my life I actually take a risk,

and look what happens.

Oh, you got to be kidding me.

It's him again-- same guy that tried to kill Marina,

only now he's messing with the van.

Hey, can I help you?

Hey, Comic-Con's the other way, dork.

Piss off.

Let's see who you really are.

Dimitri?

Nice to see you again.

You tried to kill Marina.

Why?

Why?

OK, OK.

What do you want to know?

Dammit, Benny.

Gah.

Angela was put up to this by Kate Patelle.

Even Finletter agreed.

In fact, his exact words were "that tape is a deepfake."

How does Finletter know the term "deepfake"

but still call it a tape?

Wait, you're actually talking to Finletter?

That's such a beautiful breakthrough.

I love this journey for you two.

There are more important things going on.

Look, look, look, look.

Marina, watch out!

Stand back!

Chad?

Chad?

Oh, my God, please be OK.

Please.

Marina?

He's still hydrated.

How?

Tomato proof vest, courtesy of Lieutenant Finletter.

It's all about good hydration.

I added the whipped cream.

You believed me.

Of course I did.

Well, that's great for defense,

but it does nothing to get rid of the damn things.

Come on.

We're evacuating the city.

Get your gear together and move out.

Come on.

Let's get the others.

Sifuentes.

We now go to John Davenport,

who's live on the scene.

Mrs. Sullivan, I understand your house was destroyed.

It's gone.

My house, my furniture, everything.

I had one of those My Tomatoes for protection.

It didn't do a damn thing.

No more photos of the grandkids,

no more keepsakes being passed down

from generation to generation.

Nothing left but memories.

And those won't last much longer.

I saw an emaciated dog in a ditch over there.

- Was that yours? - What?

Oh, no, Sparkles. Oh, no. No, no, no.

This woman is obviously too distraught to speak to us.

Let's find someone else to interview.

Hey, excuse me, morbidly obese guy?

Want to be on TV?

Hey, you.

Wilbur, we'd almost given up hope on you.

It's really bad out there.

Oh, I'm really glad you made it, kid.

Thanks to you.

Your tomato vest did numbers.

Get that out of my face.

Well, the Admiral wants us to begin evacuation.

No.

Luckily, the word "evacuation" has

never been in our battle plan.

NEWSCASTER; We now go live to the White House

- and Press Secretary. - Turn up the volume.

We all know yesterday, our country suffered a setback.

And this is when Americans come together.

Yes?

Yes.

What is the government doing to protect us?

Thank you for the question.

The most effective defense for your home

is to install a My Tomato.

You think that guy had stock in VegIntel?

That's what we have.

Just ignore the chyron.

What is this?

Silly.

Of course.

Turn that off.

I'll call the Admiral.

Richardson is Kate's government connection.

Let me check something.

Greg, let's go open the desk.

You guys go ahead.

I'll catch up.

I thought you guys were opposed to modern technology.

We know all about tech, we just don't like it.

As times change, Guardians change.

Wait, you process the tomatoes you catch?

That's how we pay the bills

for global operations.

You don't kill

all the cows because a bull gores a matador.

Evacuation alerts.

The town will be empty before dark.

OK, OK, OK. Wait, wait.

We all know the tomatoes are capable of infrasonic

communication, right?

And certain sounds disturb them.

Turn that up.

Now, crank up that helicopter.

Helicopters fly over the aquaculture 50 times a day.

And there's concerts all the time.

Yeah, Bluegrass Fest, which is great.

You should come with me next year.

But bad harmonies.

Your tomatoes have been sending aquatic distress signals

around the globe for months.

And now, they're coming here.

Maybe this explains the jukebox in Gangreen's lab.

This was with the records I took.

I grabbed it when Kate threw her hissy fit.

What are we missing here?

Grab that tomato and bring that back.

You sure that isn't CPI?

I think you mean CGI.

"Puberty Love" sent the tomatoes reeling in '78.

They must have matured beyond adolescence.

But why did Gangreen keep the record?

Doesn't matter. Look at that.

Even if we shrink the tomatoes, there won't be any crowds left

to stomp the shit out of them.

Wait, that's it.

There's another side to that record.

Of course-- hiding in plain sight.

Nobody listens to b-sides.

Put that thing on.

♪ Start your kick saying, join with us ♪

♪ We're going to get those tomatoes before they get us ♪

♪ We're going to beat 'em down ♪

All right, take it off. Take it off.

Well, now we know how Gangreen kept his freaky vegetables

under heel.

Unfortunately, Popeye over here gave all of FBI's research

to VegIntel.

Even if we could stop this attack,

she might be cooking up something worse.

That's on me, Marina.

I suspected Gangreen was feeding data to VegIntel.

How else would Kate develop My Tomato so fast?

But that thumb drive I gave Angela

contains encrypted malware.

Kate's in for a little surprise.

Somehow, I feel manipulated.

Look, those photos, you let us into your inner sanctum

back there on purpose.

You've been spying on us?

Absolutely, from your very first day at VegIntel.

All right.

If certain frequencies brought the tomatoes here,

then we ought to be able to send them

back home the same way.

- Yeah. - Yeah?

Who needs crowds when we have the whole ocean?

Let's send them back into the sea

and use the natural amplification of sound

to do our stomping for us.

All right, soldiers.

Let's get this jukebox in the back of the van.

We got a city to save.

Yeah.

Now, let's see what secrets these dorks have been hiding.

Dammit!

Answer Ball, My Tomato, help, help.

I warned you.

Gangreen's manipulating--

There has to be a way to fix this.

Doctor Ball went down with your network.

Miss Patelle, you have been served.

And we are very pleased to inform you

that we now have complete access to all

your devices and your network.

Boo ya!

You're welcome.

Attention all citizens,

you must evacuate the city immediately.

But don't forget to post your death and destruction videos.

Yeah.

They're actually a private organization designed to--

hey.

Oh, hey.

Oh, my God.

Dude.

Psycho.

What are you doing?

All right, team, we're going to do this.

Record.

Coburn, get that on the jukebox.

We're gonna win!

Yeah!

What in the world?

Oh, Nanny Nugget.

We're gonna lose.

Oh, now what?

Wait, Chad, do you still have the old tomato

movies on your phone?

Yeah.

Oh, the song is in the movie.

Good idea.

But we need the speakers.

Right.

Come on, come on.

I got it.

Hey, Finletter, don't suppose that thing has Bluetooth?

Shit yeah, it does.

Give me that phone.

You get down to the water.

It's your mission now, kid.

All right.

All right, who knows how to connect a phone to Bluetooth?

Wait, wait, wait.

Not so fast.

Hey. Ow, ow.

I'm not even pulling that hard.

Quiet.

Airdrop this song to your phone.

We need you to share this track with all

of your followers-- stories, TikToks,

loop de loops, whatever.

We need cross-platform viral saturation.

What's my take?

You get to live.

Marina, we gotta go.

- Do it now. - OK.

Then scram.

♪ Guard your kicks and join with us ♪

♪ We're going to get those tomatoes before they get us ♪

♪ We're going to beat them, bash them ♪

♪ Twist them, mash them in the street ♪

♪ We're going to kick them, grind them, mush them, ♪

♪ Crush them with our feet ♪

♪ We'll stomp out the filthy hordes ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ T-O-M-A-T ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, tomato ♪

♪ We'll squish them, we'll mash them, we'll mush them, ♪

♪ We'll crush them ♪

♪ We were asleep at the start of their attack ♪

♪ But now we're wide awake and we're fighting them back ♪

- ♪ Tomato ♪ - ♪ Juice ♪

♪ Tomato ♪

♪ Juice ♪

Yeah!

Oh, yeah.

A sponsor gave me these shoes.

Come on.

We blew it up.

Yeah, we did it!

Marina, come celebrate.

Not so fast, guys.

Look.

What is that?

What is that thing?

Oh, crap.

It has eyes.

Oh, hey.

I can see you.

Help me.

Oh, crap.

It has a mouth.

Oh, crap.

It has teeth.

Silence.

Sam, no.

Sam, it doesn't react well to music.

You can't kill me.

I have 10 million followers.

Yes!

They did it!

They did it!

Is that blood?

It's just ketchup.

That boy needs some whipped cream.

Nations across the globe

are celebrating Killer Tomato Victory Day.

Bells are ringing, children are singing,

and farmers are heaving sighs of elated relief.

As for the fates of Kate Patelle

and her coterie of bad guys, well, you're about to find out.

So, what exactly are we doing here?

Gangreen asked me to meet him here.

Said it was critical.

Well, where the hell is he?

Miss Patelle, Mr. Richardson,

it's a pleasure to see you two together.

Professor, what-- you're a cartoon?

Animated artificial life.

I can live forever.

Why'd you bring us here?

I'm afraid I had no choice but to intervene.

It's so difficult for a villain to find ethical conspirators

these days.

Your unquenchable thirst for power and money

has poisoned our profession and, frankly, ruined the fun.

This is not gonna end well.

Miss Patelle, Mr. Richardson.

Professor Gangreen is a--

Hello, Marina.

Whatever.

You are all under arrest.

For what?

Fraud, price fixing, and theft of government pens.

Oh, and we also have a dapper fellow in custody--

Shit.

--who says you should be charged

for conspiracy to assassinate a federal official.

Dimitri. Idiot.

I told him to get you out of the way, not kill you.

Turns out, Dimitri was a lot more

ambitious than you realized.

All those people you thought were working for you,

turns out it's just one guy.

But thousands of paychecks all being

funneled into Dimitri's offshore account.

Apparently, he figured that you'd

be too self-centered to realize that all of your Watsons

were one person.

Igor, drop the rope.

It's his fault.

Oh, no--

I haven't received a penny from this.

Money's not my thing.

More of a power guy.

Do you even know who I am?

Oh, my gosh. Yes.

Everybody at the White House says hi.

Oh, and that you owe them a report on killer tornadoes.

I give up.

Next time, kiddos.

What about me?

Ah, yes, my dear Kate.

Almost forgot.

I'm turning state's evidence.

And here's the evidence.

Night or day, day or night,

we fight the noble tomato fight.

From ages past to futures unknown,

we protect the world from veggies ungrown.

Congratulations.

You are now officially Guardians, keepers of the vine.

This responsibility has been waiting for you for decades.

The torch is passed.

Lieutenant.

Lieutenant.

Sir.

I apologize that I lost faith in yourself and your team.

I underestimated the tomato risk.

You, thank God, did not.

Shared responsibility, mutual respect, sir.

And, listen, there's no way any of this was

your fault or anyone else's.

Tomatoes are a force of nature.

And, whether we like it or not--

Nature will find a way.

I'm sick of being in the mask.

You guys are going to be the mask next time.

I've been in the mask for 35 damn years.

No way.

Greg Colburn in the flesh?

Get over here, kid.

Those eyes.

I'd almost forgotten.

Yeah.

Aren't they beautiful, Gel?

For the last time, my name is Angela.

Got it.

It must be the candles.

Come on, guys.

We've got an appointment at the Social Security office.

Good luck.

Maybe afterwards, you can explain to me

exactly when it was you decided

we all needed to retire.

The only thing worse than missing your target

is waiting too long to pull that trigger.

Oh, sorry, buddy.

No cash.

TARA, now that you've disconnected

from Kate's network and have some free time,

shall we begin preparations to meet the Guardians?

Igor, let's do that interview.

It's time I got some credit for all this fun.

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ They'll beat you, bash you, squish you, mash you ♪

♪ Chew you up for brunch ♪

♪ And finish you off for dinner or lunch ♪

♪ They're marching down the hall ♪

♪ They're crawling up the walls ♪

♪ They're truly disgusting, squishy, mushy ♪

♪ Rotten to the core ♪

♪ They're standing outside your door ♪

♪ Remember Herman Faarbage ♪

♪ While taking out his garbage ♪

♪ He turned around and he could see tomatoes ♪

♪ Hiding in the street ♪

♪ And now he's just a memory ♪

♪ I know I'm going to miss her ♪

♪ A tomato ate my sister ♪

♪ Sacramento fell today ♪

♪ They're marching into San Jose ♪

♪ Tomatoes are on their way ♪

♪ The mayor's on vacation ♪

♪ The governor, he's fled the nation ♪

♪ Police have gone on strike today ♪

♪ The National Guard have run away ♪

♪ Tomatoes will have their day ♪

♪ Attack of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ Attack ♪ of the killer tomatoes ♪

♪ They'll beat you, bash you, squish you, mash you, ♪

♪ Chew you up for lunch ♪

♪ And finish you off for dinner or lunch ♪

♪ For lunch ♪

♪ For lunch ♪

♪ Dinner or lunch, lunch, lunch, lunch, lunch, lunch ♪

♪ Dinner or lunch, lunch, lunch, lunch, ♪

♪ Lunch, lunch, lunch, lunch ♪

♪ Dinner or lunch ♪

♪ Dinner or lunch ♪

♪ Dinner or lunch ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

Mmm.

These killer tomatoes are delicious.

Great for ice cream, pizza sauce, smoothies.

Yeah, but you got to pull the trigger fast

before they turn rotten.

You know Rotten Tomatoes stole that?

Really?