Original subtitles

There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man.

It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.

It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and

superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his

knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination.

It is an area which we call the twilight zone.

Portrait of a man at work. The only work he's ever done.

The only work he knows.

His name is Henry Francis Valentine, but he calls himself Rocky.

Because that's the way his life has been.

Rocky and perilous and uphill and a dead run all the way.

He's tired now.

Tired of running or wanting.

Of waiting for the breaks that come to others, but never to him.

Never to Rocky Valentine.

Stop! Stop or I'll shoot! At this time, you lousy screw!

A scared, angry little man.

He thinks it's all over now, but he's wrong.

Peraki Valentine.

It's just the beginning.

Mr. Valentine.

Mr. Valentine.

Who are you?

My name is Pip.

Can I help you?

How do you know my name?

It's my job to know everything about you.

You a cop?

No, no, no. I'm your guide, as it were.

Guide, huh?

I need like a hole in the head.

What happened?

You had a slight accident.

Oh, but don't worry. You'll be as fit as a new fiddle soon.

Now, I'm sure you'd like to change out of those rumpled clothes, eh, Mr.

Valentine? All right, hold it a minute.

I want to know how you know my name.

But I've already told you. You told me nothing.

Let me clue you, fatso.

I don't like games.

Oh, that isn't true, Mr. Valentine. Why...

Why, if you like roulette, blackjack, poker, craps, and between the ages of

seven and ten, you were quite fond of mumble-de-peg.

What are you after, anyway?

Only one thing, Mr. Valentine.

Your comfort.

My job is to see to it that you get what you want, whatever it may be.

Yeah?

In exchange for what?

Nothing at all, Mr. Valentine.

It's absolutely free.

Don't put me on, Fatso.

Nothing's free. Nothing.

Anything I ever got in this lousy world, I had to drag out of it. So don't put me

on.

Now, what's the pitch?

You want me to do a job for you, right?

I'm afraid you don't understand.

No?

All right, let's see. All right, give me your wallet. Come on, come on.

But I don't have a wallet. Come on, Santa Claus.

No, no, honestly. Wait, wait, wait, Mr. Valentine. Really, I... It isn't the

wallet you want, is it?

No, no.

It's money.

700 bucks.

Will that be enough for now, sir?

Got more? Sure.

Yes, as much as you want. Now, shall we?

Hey, Bass.

I don't try anything funny.

Like it?

Yeah.

Yeah, some pad, all right.

Who's it belong to, some phony politician?

Why, it belongs to you, Mr. Valentine.

Mm-hmm.

Well, that is, if, uh, if you approve.

Yeah, I approve.

Good. Well, of course, we can make any changes you wish.

Ah, no.

Well, you see, I wasn't too sure about the high fire right over there, but...

You mean, you know how this gets thrown into the deal?

No, it's already in the deal, as you call it, Mr. Valentine.

Look here.

You see?

That is the master bedroom.

After you.

There.

Bathroom's in there. I'm sure you'd like a change of clothing and freshen up a

bit, hmm?

Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

Well, first of all, what's the pitch?

Come on, the pitch, the catch, the gimmick. What do I got to do for all

this? Nothing. I can't tell you more than I have, honestly. I get it. You're

just a goon, huh?

You work for somebody else, right? In a way, yes.

All right, when do I meet him? Who? The big boy, your boss.

Oh, I really couldn't say.

All right, goon.

I can wait.

Any particular color or style, sir?

No, you pick it.

Oh, I could hardly presume to do that.

However, bearing in mind that you favor a nice check, I thought perhaps...

That'll do.

Well, now we have quite a wide selection of ties here, and I believe that yellow

is your favorite color.

What's the matter with you? You got no taste?

That's a tie, see?

Hey. Huh?

It fits.

Of course.

Yes, very impressive, sir.

Yeah, well, I'll say this.

Your guy knows clothes.

Mr. Valentine?

Where'd that come from?

Well, I thought you might be a little hungry, so I just ordered up something

for you.

Ah.

You eat it.

Oh, but I don't eat. I haven't eaten in... It must be two or three centuries.

Anything wrong with it?

No.

Then eat it. I can't. I've forgotten how.

I get it.

Give a guy some new clothes and a bath and then poison him, huh? Pretty smart,

pretty smart, Batso, but not smart enough.

Now, bulletproof vest, huh?

Well, let's see how your head holds up.

Mr. Valentine, please.

We couldn't have missed, not at this range.

Maybe...

Amelia.

Where this come from? This wasn't here before.

What's going on here?

Where am I?

Mr. Valentine, do you remember when we met earlier today, I told you I was in a

sense your guide, and you said you needed a guide like a hole in the head?

Yeah. Well, as a matter of strict fact, you had a hole in the head only a short

time before.

A bullet hole.

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right.

The cops, they...

Then I must... I must be dead.

Mm-hmm.

Well, if I'm dead, then all of this, the joint, the

clothes, the booze, then I must be in heaven.

Yeah, that's it.

That's it, I'm in heaven, right?

And you're my guardian angel, something like that?

Oh, something like that, yes, Mr. Valentine. Anything I want, huh?

Anything, anything. Yeah, big talk, fatso, big talk. I want to see an

election now. Right now I want a million bucks in 5G notes and a

chick that won't quit. I mean, I mean, like stacked, like...

Well, as for the million, look in that drawer.

Now I know I'm in heaven.

Will there be anything else, sir?

Yeah, there will be, Fats. There will be. Just stick around.

Hiya, doll.

Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen. Place your bets.

No more bets, please.

33 black.

Hey, how about that? I win again. Hey, Fats. Come here. Come here. Put your

money on the table, Fats. Right there. Number 14 red. Rocky is hot tonight. Am

I right, dolls?

I'm afraid I don't have any money, sir.

You don't have any money?

What do they pay you?

Halos or something?

Come on. Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen. Place your bets.

No more bets, ladies and gentlemen.

No more bets.

Fourteen reds.

What makes what? What, huh? Forty grand in an hour.

How about it? Is Rocky hot or is Rocky hot? Oh, Rocky's hot.

Go trade this in for the owner goes, baby.

Don't see what's shaking with the cubes, huh?

Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen.

Here, baby, you'll get me some juice.

Sweetheart, go buy yourself a dress for free. Present from Rocky, huh?

It's a corset? Yeah, it's a pink converted. Be careful of it, will you,

kid? Yes, sir.

Something bothering you, Mr. Valentine?

Yeah, him.

Lousy screw.

Think he's king of the hill just because he got a couple of inches on me.

Oh, dear, that was indiscreet of me.

Better?

Yeah.

Hey, screw, come here.

You got your hat on, crooked trooper.

I want you to get rid of that heap I've been driving.

Well, it certainly goes fast enough. Is something wrong? Yeah, the ashtrays are

full.

Hey, girls, uh, would you wait in here for a minute? I want to talk to Fats for

a minute, all right?

In we go.

Hey,

Fats, how about tomorrow we look up some of my old buddies, huh? Like Matt Gorman

or Fink Mitchell, Silky Armstrong, huh?

What's the matter? They didn't make it? Oh, it's not that, Mr. Valentine. It's,

uh... Well, it's rather difficult to explain, really. You see, all of this,

it's, uh...

Well, it's your own private domain.

It was made, well, especially for you alone.

Oh, well, what about them? You mean they're props, like in a movie?

In a sense, yes. Everything here is, except, of course, you and me.

Oh.

Look, sit down for a minute, Fats. I want to ask you something.

It's been kind of bugging me anyway.

I mean, how come they let me in here, huh? I thought this was only for, like,

schoolteachers and like that. Oh, we have some schoolteachers here. Hmm.

Well, there must have been something real good I'd done sometime. Something

that made up for everything else, huh?

Yeah, that's it.

But, uh... But what?

When did I ever do anything good?

Uh, well, listen.

How do I find out about this, huh? Well, we have a hall of records here. Would

you like me to take you there? Well, is it open at this hour? I mean, it's

almost light.

Oh, it's always open. Well, all right. Let's go.

Hey, uh, dolls.

Don't go away, will you? I'll be right back. I just want to get something

cleared up with bats.

Henry Francis Valentine.

Born 1923, Brooklyn, New York.

Age of six, slaughtered small dog.

Well, why not? He bit me.

Age of seven, stole 14 toys from dime store.

Age of eight, organized street gang, the Angels.

How about that, huh? That's what we call ourselves, the Angels.

There's a great little bunch.

age of nine, broke into a bicycle store.

What is this, anyway?

You reckon?

Well, uh, you don't think it'd be some mistake, do you?

Not likely.

I can't figure it.

But if it don't bother him, I ain't gonna let it bother me, you know what I

mean? What are you gonna do now, Mr. Valentine?

Uh... I don't know.

Pool around with the dolls?

Do some more craps, maybe?

Or if you need me for anything, Mr. Valentine, just dial P-I-P.

Yeah.

13

black,

ladies and gentlemen. 13 black.

What about your chips, sir?

Nail them to me.

Straight flush.

Royal flush.

You win again, Mr. Valentine.

Yeah, I know. That's all I ever do in this nutty joint is win, win, win.

Is there anything else I can do for you?

Yeah, get out of here, will you? I'm sick of looking at you. Come on, out,

out. You too. Come on, out, out, out. Let's go. Come on, come on.

Come on, get out of here. Come on, get out.

Roy, come on. Come on. Come on. Keep moving. Step it up. Come on. Come on.

Out. Out. Out.

Dumb broads.

Who needs them?

Yes, Mr. Valentine, what can I do for you? Will you stop creeping around?

Anything you say, sir. Anything I say, anything I say. Knock it off, will you?

Is something wrong?

No, no, nothing's wrong. Everything is just peachy.

Look, I've been in this dump for a month and I can't stand it anymore.

But I don't understand.

All right, I'll spell it out for you, Fats. I'm bored, bored.

I mean, there's no excitement around here, no kicks.

Yeah, but the gambling, I thought you enjoyed that.

I do.

But when you win every time, that ain't gambling. That's charity.

Well, I could arrange for you to lose occasionally if you'd like. Would that

help? It might.

No, no, it's no good. It ain't the same. I would know.

Perhaps you miss your old vocation. Is that it?

Now you're getting it. Well, there's a nice bank at the corner that you could

rob. Or would you prefer a jewelry store?

No, no. Bank's okay.

Well, fine, fine.

Now, as to the getaway cab, well, we have quite a large variety to choose

from. Something inconspicuous, I imagine. Wait a minute.

Is there a chance that I could get caught?

Well, of course, if that's what you'd like. Let me just make a note of it.

Come on, sit down, Pat. Sit down.

Now, look.

I don't know how to explain this, but it just ain't the same thing.

I mean, what's the kick knocking off a bank if everybody knows about it?

Huh?

And the dames. I never thought I would get bored with beautiful dames, but...

Look, look.

I wouldn't expect an angel to understand this, see, but being a big guy with a

chick, it don't mean anything if it's all set up in advance.

And I mean, everything is great here, you see, really great. It's just the way

I always imagine it, except that just between you and me, Fats, I don't think

I belong here. I don't think I fit in.

Oh, nonsense.

Of course you do.

No, no, I mean it. I mean it. It's just somebody must have goofed. If I got to

stay here another day, I'm going to go nuts.

Look, look, I don't belong in heaven, see?

I want to go to the other place.

Heaven?

Whatever gave you the idea you were in heaven, Mr. Valentine?

This is the other place.

Now he has everything he's ever wanted.

And he's going to have to live with it for eternity.

In the Twilight Zone.

Rod Serling, the creator of Twilight Zone, will tell you about next week's

story after this word from our alternate sponsor.

And now, Mr. Serling.

Next week, you'll spend a few rather unforgettable hours in this living room

watching Miss Janice Rule and Mr. Shepard Strudwick.

Partake of a dramatic delicacy that is one part nursery rhyme, one part terror.

This is designed for those of you who are getting too much sleep.

Next week on The Twilight Zone, Nightmare as a Child.

I hope we'll see you then. Thank you, and good night.

Be sure to see the fun-filled family life of one of America's greatest

entertainers, The Danny Thomas Show, Monday nights over most of these

stations.