Original subtitles

So where did you find me?

On a website?

I was reading some of your reviews.

And looking at your pictures, I really liked your smile.

Thank you.

Those are all recent pictures, too.

Well,

I like what I see, so... I look forward to meeting you.

Me too.

What do you like to do?

I'm pretty flexible. I can do mild stuff to wild stuff.

Boy next door.

Role playing.

Really, I like to just get an idea of what you're into.

What do you like to do?

I want to do everything.

Do you do condoms, bareback?

What do you do?

I can do both.

Okay, let's figure that out when you get here then.

Okay.

Do you kiss?

Yeah.

Yeah, I like to do that. I like to have something to do with my mouth.

Do you party?

No. No, I don't do drugs.

I don't party anymore.

But you can.

Have you been to New York before?

No.

But you know, I would love to come. I've always wanted to see the Big Apple.

How much for a weekend?

Oh, um, usually I do 1,000 for an overnight, so

2,000 is cool.

Okay.

When are you available?

When could you come?

Um, I'm just looking at my calendar.

Got some time in April.

Probably the first two weeks.

Okay, let's say the second weekend.

Okay.

I'll pen that in or pencil that in?

Pen it in.

I told you there was going to be cameras.

Oh, I know. I just wanted to make sure that my entrance was good.

Which I probably just ruined it right now, right?

Don't worry.

Just be yourself. It's okay. Don't worry.

Just relax.

Let me help you with that. Oh, thanks.

You can film for a while.

Now I'm nervous.

You're nervous?

I'm nervous. You've got a lot of cameras here.

I wanted to capture everything.

Don't worry, I'm not going to use it for anything.

Why not?

You can have all the tapes when we're done.

Oh, okay.

That's cool.

We can use them as evidence.

Okay.

It's really one time for the...

How

was your

flight?

It was a little bumpy.

Yeah? Yeah.

But... Look home.

I fucking need to take a shower.

You know, just like, lay down.

Here.

Thank you.

Put that away.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

This is gonna be fine.

I feel a little too much. What?

It's a little too bright.

No?

It's okay.

I still want to come.

I've never gotten fucked bareback before.

I was gonna ask, um... You want me to continue?

Yeah. Yeah? Yeah.

Sure? Yeah.

Positive?

Um...

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

Oh my

God.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm okay.

I'm okay.

I'm okay.

I'm good.

Okay. So I'm going to do some more of that later.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah, you'll feel better after you take a shower.

Alright,

let's go lay down.

Hey. Hey. Feel better?

Yeah. How about you?

Yes.

What do you want to do?

Get some food. Yeah? Get some food?

Yes, I'd like to place an order.

Can I get the salad a la Grec?

What's the risotto of the day?

Okay.

Can I get the ravioli fromage?

Yeah.

And do you have a wine opener that we can borrow?

No, I think that's it.

It's 9.01.

And we'll be paying cash.

Okay.

Okay, bye.

Alright.

Time to get dressed.

We should get dressed.

Maybe we could party later.

Right now, I'm not partying.

So, um... You can.

I've actually never...

I've heard it before.

So... I'd love to try it.

Well, there's ecstasy.

You don't want to do G, because that would put you to sleep.

Um... It's crystal.

Yeah. There's lots of things I want to try.

Cool. Huh?

Um... Okay.

Okay, let's eat first, and then we'll figure it out.

Sure you don't mind?

Ah,

it's tempting.

If it'd be crystal, it'd probably be a bummer.

Really?

You don't have to be, like, a viewer for a company on. Like, tell me

specifically, man. I'm just curious what you do.

It's boring.

I'm in management.

Okay.

But I do get to travel.

Good.

I don't know if you told her or not. Did you say you've hired people before or

this is your first time hiring somebody?

It's my first time.

So, have you seen anybody?

I was.

For a while.

Not anymore.

How long were you together?

About ten years.

I think after that much time, you know, you just sort of become friends.

All the romance and sex are gone.

So you guys just, you broke up though? I mean, first? Yeah.

He fell in love with somebody else.

Since how long ago does it end?

It's been about three years now.

Do you go out at all?

Or do you hook up?

Yeah, I mean I meet people.

online or... I don't really go to bars much anymore.

Am I too old for that?

You're not.

I don't think so.

Sex is easy enough to find. It's, you know...

What I do, it's harder to

find somebody who understands this sort of thing.

I really like to do it. I enjoy it.

I know the times are gonna come where I'm no longer hireable.

So until then, I'd just rather continue doing what I'm doing.

I like it.

You know, it's amazing because I can have a lot of good sex doing this and

make people feel good.

It's like being a florist.

That's what I tell myself.

Yeah, it's pretty good news.

I hope so. Hopefully.

But no, no boyfriend.

Where did you start?

Being a florist.

How old did I say I was on my profile?

It's been about 10 years now.

And how did it start?

I mean, you don't have to answer me if you don't want to. I'm just curious.

I started out stripping in DC.

And how did you start doing that?

A friend of mine was doing it.

And so I drank a little too much one night, and he convinced me to hop on the

stage. It's like an amateur night, and I enjoyed it, and it was fun.

I thought, okay, I can do this for a while.

And I did.

And they just kind of go hand in hand.

And very, very one night, I had some guy who was tipping me very well, and he

wanted to continue tipping me outside of the bar.

So, it's out of the game.

Okay.

Do you have a good lonely?

Mm-hmm.

I think I have this fantasy of, um, the whole Pretty Woman thing.

I don't know.

One day.

Richard Gere is gonna come.

Of course he will.

What?

I just... I just got me thinking.

Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

It's a bad thing.

Okay then, let's put an end to that.

What should

I do

now?

Oh, you don't want to know.

Sure I know.

I took your fork.

Nothing important.

You're very sweet.

Thanks.

Terrible compliments.

I never know what to say.

You don't have to say anything.

Okay. Of course, if I knock down a few more of these, you might not be able to

shut me out.

Okay.

So, should I stop? Is that a threat or a promise? I don't know if they're good or

bad.

And one good thing about being a hooker, if I can say that in one way.

is that you get to meet people. You get to find out about people.

And I did major in psychology in school.

And so, somewhat, on a level, I feel like I've been using that

to some degree.

And what opinion have you formed of people

through this?

People are lonely.

I get that a lot.

I mean, there's some people that are addicted to, say, like, prostitutes.

I mean, they're not lonely people. They just get off on it.

They get off on it how?

The idea of hiring, like, somebody like me.

Oh. Oh.

You mean were they, like, so they were in control?

Or... I think, yeah, that some of them were in control.

Um... Or they were like to turn it on and turn it off.

Yeah. No emotional attachments.

There's that.

But that, yeah.

But, I mean...

What are your dreams?

I don't even know if I have any dreams.

That sucks.

You must have something.

That sucks. I have no dreams.

I'd like to write a book.

I'd like to just be somebody who makes enough money to get by and be happy and

whatever. I don't know what that means.

Sometimes I feel like I'm living my dream. I feel like what I'm doing is

just what I like to do, like I said.

In many ways, I don't want moments like this to end. I know that the day is

going to come where I'm not going to be able to do this anymore.

I might not know what I'm going to do.

Does that... Does that scare you? Uh-huh.

Yeah, it does.

Well, I think you've got a ways to go.

Okay, thank you.

What are your dreams?

To die happy.

And what more do you want?

To not be alone.

I'll get to that.

Alone now.

Sleepy.

So, yeah.

That's music.

Nice.

Oh.

No.

You okay in there?

Yeah, yeah, I'm doing.

Hey,

cameras again.

Feels good.

Much better.

That's cool.

You can see people and they can see you.

And then they can, you can talk to them, and they can talk to you.

This could be a big thing.

This

guy's

listening.

I hope he's listening.

What is that thing?

Let's find out where they are.

They want to know if we want to come over and party there.

What do you think?

Now you said you wanted to, right?

Yeah.

It's very good.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I'm okay.

Oh, yeah.

Thank you.

Oh yeah.

It's too hot.

I'm gonna keep going.

Are you feeling okay?

Yeah.

I feel great.

No regrets?

Mm.

Cool. I like your tattoo. I had a nice one earlier, so... That's, uh...

a state.

Yeah. How good is your geography?

Well, I'm okay, but I think you said you're from Maine.

Yeah. So, it's Maine.

I feel like my teeth are coming off.

I'm glad you got them off.

I like your necklace.

Thanks. Where'd you get that?

I can't remember.

I think I had it down in Florida.

I was homecoming king in college.

Candidate. Really?

It's kind of funny though because in high school I had no friends.

It was the farthest thing from a homecoming.

So it was kind of fun to do that.

Did you have a girlfriend?

No. In college.

Yeah, she was this real Christian girl.

So it made it very easy not to have to do the things that

we did earlier.

It was more of a Catholic girlfriend.

She wasn't Catholic.

Christian? Born again or something?

Yeah,

actually Catholic girls are the ones who always get pregnant.

She was real sweet.

We were together for a couple years.

And then, when I knew I was gay, I called her up.

And I told her that... Excuse me.

I told her that the reason why we broke up was not her. It was only me.

And she appreciated that because it

allowed her to find somebody that really loved her. That wasn't going to hurt

her.

What happened to her? Did it help?

She probably got married, had kids.

I doubt she's doing what I'm doing right now.

It's been such a long time ago.

I want her to get married and have kids.

Have you ever fucked a girl?

No.

You should try it.

You've done it?

Mm-hmm.

But I asked her to marry me.

And she said no.

Why?

Because she was in love with one of my best friends.

So do you regret that?

I don't know.

It would be nice to have some kids.

You still can.

Yeah, I guess.

I don't know how hard it is to know. But I mean, it would have been nice to have

kids then.

Kids that were being teenagers now are heading off to college and having their

own kids.

Yeah, you don't want to deal with that now.

And actually, I don't... I don't know what happened to her. I know she didn't

end up with my friend that she was in love with.

That's a stupid story.

I don't believe in love anymore.

It's too painful.

All you ever do is end up getting hurt or hurting someone.

Take care of yourself.

Of course.

I hope we can do this again, actually.

I had a great time.

If you're up for it.

I'd love to see you again.

Just be happy.

Enjoy your life.

Do what you want to do.

You're free.

Free.

Trade shares.

Can't share with water.

If you can.

That's all there is.

I need to get out of this.

It's finally bright. It's getting bright.

How's the sun coming up?

Already look like rock stars have taken over the place.

It's time to get up.

Thank you.

So where did you find me?

On a website?

I was reading some of your reviews and looking at your pictures, I really

liked your smile.

Thank you.

Those are all recent pictures, too.

Well, I like what I see, so I look forward to meeting you.

How much for a weekend?

Oh, um, usually I do a thousand for an overnight, so... Two

thousand's cool.

Okay.

One more time. This is Gary Kramer. I'm a freelance film critic. I'm here to

interview Greg Tucker and Todd Vero for Leave Blank.

Greg, how did you meet Todd?

I met Todd online.

I believe he contacted me.

I'm not sure where, honestly.

We got to talking, and he wanted to put me in a movie, and so he said, you know,

when I'm in New York next to let him know, and then we worked it out.

And what did you know about him or his films?

When he contacted me, I hadn't known anything, but once we were in

communication, he sent me a few of his films, and I watched them, and I was

excited to work on them.

What appealed to you about this role, and why did you take this part?

It was a... I don't know.

It was a challenge to... I'd never acted before in a movie, so it was exciting to

be doing one, and the challenge of it was something that was appealing, and

I was willing to go wherever the character went.

with what he had in mind.

So, you know, just playing into that and doing what

Todd wanted me to do. I was excited to do it.

How did you approach or research the role of an escort?

I know some people who have escorted and

it...

I've done that too. So I have experience doing that. And so I was able to tap

into that mindset.

So I knew that when Todd said that he had done it as well, that it

kind of put me more at ease. So, you know, we understood each other.

How did your experience as an escort help you in preparing the film?

Since I'd done some escorting, I would say like 80% of

the movie wasn't scripted. So when it came time to go off script,

having those experiences really helped me out because I could go into

maybe some of my own experiences, and so I wasn't totally lost.

So that helped a lot.

Did you discuss your experiences escorting with Todd and with his

experiences? I don't think I knew Todd's experiences going into it.

I think it was only after I got here that I found that out.

I'm already drawing. What was the question?

Did you discuss your experiences escorting with Todd, and did he discuss

his experiences? Did you find a common element that you wanted to... bring to

Leafline? I think I understand it more.

As far as, like I said, I didn't know Todd's experiences with it, but I know

that Todd knew about my history, which I think that's why

that he created this role for me, because he knew that it's something that

I could tap into.

So, yeah, we talked about it.

I can't remember talking about it, but I know we had to probably, so.

Okay, are you into wild, mild roleplay, party, kissing?

What do you like to do?

I guess it depends on my mood, but I think I've calmed down a lot in the last

five years.

So I think it's more mild now, but it was pretty wild five years ago.

Most actors sleep with their director to get the part. You seem to have gotten

the part and then slept with the director.

What can you say about the experience of fucking Todd?

It was fun because I'm 90% bottom and maybe 80% nowadays, now since

this last year. So I'm still predominantly bottom, so it was exciting

to get to do that. I hadn't really done that much of it, so that was a

challenge, but it was fun.

How does Todd rate as a lover?

That's hard to talk about because Todd's like, you know, um,

scale one to ten?

A nine, because I never give tens usually, so.

Yeah. When you find a ten, that'll be it.

You'll be done, right? Yeah, then, yeah.

But there's always that one, that little, that one spot always open for,

you know, when there's an eleven out there, like, you know, what's your ten

to ten?

Why did you not use condoms in the film?

I don't think it was even discussed that condoms would be used. So if

they had been, I would have done that.

But it's also, for me, as a personal, I would have not used condoms.

And also, as the character that Todd played, it

was a reckless weekend for him.

And we know how it ended, so I don't think he was too...

concerned about that.

Topping, bottoming, fellating, rimming, what do you like to do and what do you

like to have done?

All of those are good.

They've all been done to me and I enjoy all of them. Are you going to rank them?

Maybe, yeah.

I mean, do you prefer doing them or receiving them or do you have no

preference? I probably prefer I prefer receiving, just because I don't know if

I have my confidence factor with giving.

Sometimes I overthink it, and that messes with my head. So receiving, it

just seems a lot easier.

But it's always good to succeed when you give.

I don't mind giving. I just don't always feel like I'm going to be any good at

it.

Did your experiences in the Leaf Blank satisfy you?

Definitely. It was very fun.

And, yeah, it left me hungry to do more.

Have you watched the movie?

You know, I have not.

And I have my copy waiting for me. I got it last week before I came here, and I

just haven't had a chance to get it.

But I'm excited to see it.

My friend opened the mail, though, because I had opened my mail, and he

told me that he saw it. So, yeah.

Can't wait.

What did he say about it? He liked it.

One part he thought was strange was drinking wine on the toilet.

And so I'm like, really?

And it's weird, but I know we filmed it a year ago, and I do remember that now,

but when he first said that, I'm like, oh, okay, I guess we did do that.

But I don't know what, I don't know.

Okay.

Yeah. We'll see.

What do you think viewers will get out of watching you guys have hot sex on

film?

It depends, I think, on what they are

prior to watching a movie. If they're going into the movie and they're

looking for the wild sex, I'm sure they're getting off on it.

Or if someone's watching the movie and they don't know that that's in the

movie. And it shows up, it could be shocking, exciting.

I think it could probably turn somebody on when they least expect it to.

Which is kind of exciting.

What turns you on?

Cameras.

A lot.

I'm an exhibitionist, but I'm also a voyeur.

So this whole thing is exciting.

Your character's in a power position.

You're young, desirable, the object of affection, yet you're really at the

mercy of Todd's character and Todd the filmmaker.

How did you maintain a sense of control making the film, or did you just give

yourself over to him completely?

I pretty much gave myself over completely.

There were just a few points that we talked about prior to shooting that I

wasn't comfortable with on film.

And so, and he respected that, and so everything was great.

How did this film push the limits of your comfort level, the boundaries of

what you would or would not do on the screen?

It was pretty comfortable shooting it. I don't think anything offhand

pushed my comfort level.

I was just more worried about...

The acting part of it, you know, being a believable character.

We shot it in like a day and a half.

So there was a lot of pressure, I guess, in that sense. I was only here for a few

days. And to get it done, there wasn't a lot of room to mess up and

hardly any time to do a take two or anything like that. So that was probably

the most scary part for me.

The eating scene's my favorite. It's so natural, and it's shot in one take.

How hard was that scene to do? I expect it was more difficult than the sex

scenes. It certainly feels more intimate. Yeah, because we didn't talk

about it going into it. I knew we had the camera on.

There was two people, it was just Todd and I. We were both on the bed, so

there's nobody that can be moving the camera around and cutting and doing

things like that. So I assumed it would be one take.

I was worried about how messy it ended up. I knew I could start it off good.

But it was just throughout the whole, that whole

shot, I was just so worried about messing up or saying something out of

character or, I don't know, just messing up.

It was, yeah.

But I was excited when it was finally finished because, you know, it was a

huge relief.

And I thought after we were done it went well.

Were you acting or more or less playing yourself on camera?

Um, it was, it was important for me not to be myself, um,

because what was exciting was the chance to act. Um, with that said, I

did find myself, though, getting personal in some of my experiences.

Only because I, you know, I didn't have, uh,

I didn't really know, like, my character.

And all, you know, it was... Anyway.

Well, I mean, you... It was me, basically, but... But a version of

yourself, a different version of yourself. Yeah, yeah.

The reflective scenes were pretty interesting to me. In the cab, in the

mirror, in the bathroom.

How hard were those for you to do?

They... They were... They were a little difficult.

You know, it was my first movie, so I just wanted to... I was

always just worried about, you know, does this seem natural? Does this make

sense?

And not look too spooked out or ruin a shot or something.

How much of the dialogue did you improvise?

I would say 80%. Yeah.

That's just a guess, but...

There was a big chunk of it that was impressed.

We had a structured outline of what would happen, but as far as the actual

words were, yeah, honest.

How much of the backstory of your character do you have to create for the

role, and what was that process like for you?

I didn't really create a lot of backstory for it.

Todd, he told me a few things of who this person is, but...

I think that for the most part, he wanted me to see where I would take it.

So it would seem, as we had our conversations, more natural.

Todd, what was your purpose in making this film?

You show a weekend with a hustler.

Are you still trying to work out your experiences from that period in your

life?

I wouldn't say work out the experiences in my life. I would say...

It all came about because I was living in San Francisco and I was working at

the Knob Hill Sonoma as a manager, and I met a lot of escorts and porn stars,

and I've had my own experiences with that.

And one of the escorts that I met through working there told me this story

about how he...

This guy hired him for a weekend, and during that weekend he, spoiler alert,

kills himself.

And he did it because he wanted to have someone with him when he did it.

So that story always stuck in my head. I mean, this was like 15 years ago. So I

always wanted to do something with that.

And I decided that.

that this would be a good way to do it, to actually shoot something over a

weekend and do it for real, sort of.

Wow, I didn't know that.

That really happened.

You seem to be a fan of Greg's and enjoyed working with him.

How did you choose him as your co-star, and what about him appeals to you?

Does he remind you of a younger version of yourself, perhaps?

Or is he your ideal guy?

Well, we met online and I talked to him for a while and I always found him to be

very interesting and very sexy and hot.

But there's a quality about him that was also very open in a way. I mean, I felt

like he was somebody that my character would want to spend the weekend with and

want to open himself up to.

be there with. I mean, there was just a sweetness or something about him that

was nice.

So, you know, we talked about the movie and what I wanted to do, and she was

interested in doing it, so I figured it would be a good way to do it, and it all

worked out well.

How would you rate Greg as a sexual partner?

Would you want to have a more prolonged relationship with him than just this

weekend?

It was hard. It was hard because I do find him really attractive and hot and

sexy. But when we were filming, I was a different person, so

I couldn't really enjoy it.

But it was definitely a fun time.

By the end of the film, it feels like a message movie.

Enjoy life.

Was that your intent, or were you thinking about your own mortality?

Oh, geez.

Yeah, I mean, if there is a message to it, I would think, yes, that's the

message. Enjoy life.

You know, life is short, so many people spend

so much time worrying about things that don't matter. And what does matter is

your relationships with other people.

connection to other people.

Enjoying life is something that most people don't do.

My character certainly didn't do that his whole life, so he enjoyed himself

this last weekend.

Was it difficult to act in this part? Oh yeah.

It was really hard because I like being behind the camera. I don't like being in

front of it.

But I knew for this movie that I had to be in front of it, that I couldn't get

someone else to do this because it was all sort of in my head and I needed to

be able to interact with him.

And it's not something I could really tell someone how to do.

So, yeah, I don't like being in front of the camera.

I'm not, I don't really think I am an exhibitionist.

I mean, it's easier for me to be in front of the camera with my clothes off.

Talking in front of the camera is not something I like.

You challenge yourself when you take your roles. How did this film challenge

you?

Well, I think I challenge myself when I take these roles just by taking them.

Whenever I'm doing something in one of my movies, it's because I know that this

would be something really hard for someone else to do and something that I

wouldn't really feel comfortable.

making someone else do.

When I started out doing short experimental films, I did things where

I'd crawl across glass or cut myself up.

Just crazy masochistic things.

Maybe that's it. I'm a masochist and I like to torture myself when I'm on film.

So I enjoy it, but it's very hard.

Greg said the script had about 25% dialogue.

The book was improvised and ad-libbed.

How did you conceive of the characters, their arcs, their plots, and the

dialogue and talking points?

What was the genesis for this?

Well, we talked a lot about what was going to happen and how it was going to

happen and sort of, you know, the structure of what was going to happen.

But I knew that this was something that...

we couldn't really script because we had to be in the moment, we had to just be

these characters and react to each other the way that we would react.

Which is, you know, risky because who knows what's going to happen, but at the

same time there's sort of an excitement there and a realness that you couldn't

get if I wrote all this stuff down.

And I think because we both have had sort of experiences with

this kind of thing that

we could draw upon those and really understand both sides of each character

so it was easier for us to do that.

You use multiple cameras, the internet, other media to tell your story which is

visually exciting.

How do you layer your films this way?

Well for this film it was

He sets up cameras because he wants to film everything that happens.

That was sort of the premise of the film, is that he's paying this guy to be

with him for the weekend and he wants to document the whole thing.

What the guy he's paying doesn't realize is he's doing this actually for him so

that he will have evidence that there was no foul play on his part.

Which I think is kind of, you know...

nice thing for him to have done but at the same time I think he's also

you know in our culture these days we're sort of obsessed with documenting every

aspect of our lives and you know that's sort of it's sort of a comment on that

too and so much interaction happens online where

you know you you can talk to people all over the world but never meet them and

You can create different personas for different people that you meet.

So the line between what's real and what's not real and fantasy and

what you're actually willing to do is completely blurred.

So that's something that I wanted to explore, where he has maybe done this

his whole life, gone online and fantasized about things, and now he's

actually going to do all this stuff his final weekend.

What can you say about the P&B scene?

It's necessary for your character's arc, but it draws tension on Greg's

character. Why did you feel the need to include this?

You know, it's something that, you know, is a part of

gay life, really. I mean, I don't know. I mean, people like to

party and they like to play and...

My character hasn't really done that but he's always been fascinated by that so

he wants to do it and I thought it would be an interesting dynamic to have him

want to do this thing that he's never done before and the person he's with

sort of is trying to avoid that but also intrigued by it so it would set up a

nice tension and also

you know, give the audience that also maybe hasn't had experience with this or

has, can relate or can sort of go through what we go through.

Do you think the film needed to be so explicit?

I think it's an interesting film because it's really emotionally explicit.

Yeah, it is sexually explicit, and I don't think it...

really needs to be more sexually explicit.

But I think for me what's interesting about it is just how emotionally

explicit it is.

Moments with each character alone are very voyeuristic and

sort of creepy in that, you know, you're seeing them in situations where you

normally don't see people, where they're completely alone.

And that kind of voyeurism interests me more than sort of...

graphic sex, which is also very nice, but not the main point of the film.

Is it harder for you to act in films or in the porn scenes, or in the eating

sequences?

Oh, the eating sequence is much harder.

The sex scenes were pretty easy because it was sort of, you know, it's easier to

work with Greg.

You know, with sex, it's sort of like you know where you're going.

I mean, it's an interplay with the other character, and it's easy. And for me,

talking is always harder.

So the eating scene, you know, we cover a lot of material, and we really

needed to go through a lot of different things. So it was really hard to focus

and really keep it heading in the right direction for the whole thing.

Because it's all one take, it was also really, you know, stressful, but I think

that adds something to it. It adds a sort of tension that should have been

there and was important to be there.

Which challenges you as an actor in this stage of your career?

What challenges me now as a filmmaker is staying fresh,

always trying new ideas, staying experimental, staying

true to myself.

not being seduced by more commercial pursuits.

And just, you know, I really enjoy making movies, so it's not like it's a

challenge for me to make something.

It's more of a challenge for me to sort of stay energetic and stay

excited about the film industry.

Despite your shy nature, you continue to reveal your extra business tendencies,

jerking off, getting fucked, and even wiping your ass in the toilet.

Are you ever embarrassed by what you do on screen or have done on screen? Is

there anything you won't do?

See, it's funny because those things don't embarrass me. I mean, I never, I

don't like to watch myself on camera.

I don't like to watch my movies when they play.

For me, making the movies, editing the movies,

And getting them out there is what I enjoy, but I don't enjoy watching them

with an audience because it's way too nerve-wracking and I

wouldn't say I get embarrassed, but I just get really anxious watching.

But for me, doing embarrassing or things that people would consider embarrassing

onto the camera has never really bothered me because I don't know why.

Maybe it's because I just, I just, I,

it's not like I like exposing myself, but I just like getting to the real,

real parts of being a human being.

I don't know.

Has this film screened?

We, it showed in Berlin.

We had a really great screening there, a really good response from the audience.

Like I said, I don't watch, but I had a lot of people say that they really liked

the movie and they really, they wanted to give me a hug afterwards because they

felt so bad for my character, which was kind of nice.

So I got lots of hugs.

That's it.

Okay.

Thank you.

Oh.

So we get it.

It's my sheets living this time.

They've had it easy for the last couple of days.

Can you turn it up?

What?

Get it up?

Absolutely got it.

Whatever you need.

I'll hop in a little later.

What? I'll hop in later.

Oh my gosh.

Is your camera on still?

Probably.

You filmed me cleaning up a little bit.

Yep.