Original subtitles

[bright chimes]

[chuckling]

[bluesy rock music]

♪ ♪

[bell rings]

[chuckling]

- Well, it's finally spring break, Butt-Head.

- Spring only comes once a year, Beavis,

so we're gonna use this time to the fullest.

- That's right, yeah.

Yeah, we're gonna watch TV the whole time.

Yeah. [chuckles]

- Let us begin. [chuckles]

- Um, wait a second, Butt-Head.

I think the remote's broken. Um, I don't, um--

everything looks upside-down or something.

- [slurps] I don't care, dumbass.

Turn the TV on. [chuckles]

- OK, OK, I'll try, yeah. [chuckles]

I'm just gonna just, um, press all the buttons

until something works. Um...

- [speaking Spanish]

- There we go, yeah. [chuckles]

- [speaking Spanish] - [speaking Spanish]

- Um, I can't understand what they're saying, Butt-Head.

[chuckles]

- Uh, me neither. [chuckles]

Oh, well. Who cares?

[chuckles]

- [speaking Spanish]

- [speaking Spanish]

Whoo!

- [speaking Spanish]

- [speaking Spanish]

- [speaking Spanish]

- [speaking Spanish] Goal!

- [speaking Spanish] - [speaking Spanish]

[Spanish speaking voices rapidly alternating]

- [speaking Spanish]

[TV clicks]

- Uh...

vimos mucha la TV. [chuckles]

- Sí, sí, Butt-Head. [chuckles]

Sí, verdad.

- El TV es frío.

[chuckling]

- Sí, sí. Eso es frío.

[chuckles] Sí. Sí!

[chuckles]

- [vocalizing]

- [sighs] Well, this is nice.

- ♪ I used to float ♪

- Uh, yeah.

- ♪ Now I just fall down ♪

- ♪ Dah, dah, dah, dah ♪ [chuckles]

- ♪ But I'm not sure now ♪

- How come she's folding these tiny clothes?

[chuckles]

- Uh, I think she's supposed to be,

like, folding clothes for that tiny guy from the cartoon.

- What tiny guy? [chuckles]

- Uh...

You know, that cartoon about that guy,

and he's, like, really tiny, and he lives in a house.

- Uh, let's see. Um, George Jetson?

- George Jetson isn't tiny, dumbass.

He's in outer space.

- [grunts]

Oh, I know. Skeletor?

- Damn it, Beavis, Skeletor isn't tiny.

He's just, like, He-Man's skeleton that escaped.

- [grunts]

[chuckles] Oh, no, wait, um, I know.

It's that guy-- that guy Flintstone.

[screams]

- Oh, wait a second. I think that is it.

- Ow! - That's the guy.

Yeah, it's that guy Flintstones.

He's like, really tiny. [chuckles]

- Oh, really? I never knew he was tiny.

[chuckles]

- Yeah, he's tiny because he, like, started out as a vitamin,

and then he was, like, struck by lightning or something

and turned him into a real human being.

[chuckles]

They just seem big because there's

dinosaurs all around 'em. [chuckles]

- You know, my uncle was really into "The Flintstones."

And at the end of the day, when he was working at the dump,

he'd say, time to slide down the dinosaur.

[chuckles]

And then he'd go home and slide into 15 beers.

[chuckles]

- Uh, OK. [chuckles]

- Yeah.

Yeah, then he-- then he divorced my aunt,

and then he moved to San Jose, I think.

And, um-- - Uh, Beavis, I don't care.

[chuckles]

- I think he tried to get a job in a scrapyard, but, um--

yeah, and you can see why, you know, 'cause--

'cause he worked at a dump.

But, you know, California, it's all unions, you know?

[chuckles] So then he, uh--

I think he applied at another dump.

- Uh, Beavis, shut up. [chuckles]

- Then I think he tried his luck down in San Diego.

Yeah, that was it.

Yeah, 'cause they have a big Navy base down there.

He didn't want to join the Navy, though, you know.

He said, um, if I wanted to say, "yes, sir"

and keep following orders, I would have stayed married.

[chuckles] You know?

He was banned from SeaWorld, I think, but I don't know why.

- [snores]

- You know, they're further apart than you think,

San Diego and San Jose, you know?

You know, there's a long stretch near Camp Pendleton

where there's no exits, but, uh,

well, there's definitely some traffic, you know?

Good night. Oh, boy.

- [snores]

- Have you ever been on a whale watching tour Butt-Head?

Butt-Head? Um... Are you asleep, Butt-Head?

- ♪ Something I wait for ♪

- [snores] You said dump.

- ♪ Something I'm made for ♪

- Well, anyway, those clothes sure are tiny, huh?

[chuckles]

- Welcome back from spring break, everyone.

- Uh, qué? [chuckles]

- Yeah, como? [chuckles]

- Beavis and Butt-Head, is there a problem?

- Uh, no comprende. [chuckles]

- No es comprendador. No. Sí, sí.

- [exhales sharply] Boys,

I don't understand what you're saying.

- El confusiado del educador [chuckling]

- Sí. Sí. Es culo zabalamente.

Sí. [chuckles]

- I'm gonna go get the Spanish teacher, mm-kay?

They came back from spring break,

and now all they speak is Spanish.

- Verdamanca ba gulo. [chuckles]

- Ba gula zamacana, sí. [chuckles]

- Sí, sí, sí, sí. [chuckles]

- I don't think they're speaking Spanish either.

- Gulo bu gazanda.

- Grambe butthole-amente.

[chuckling]

- Sí.

- Well, then what's happening?

- It's possible for kids this age,

if they're completely immersed in a new language,

to forget the old one.

- La mananda? [chuckles]

- But it's as if these two lacked

the intellectual capacity to learn the new language.

- Gaboonza bacardo. [chuckles]

- Bacardo! Sí, sí.

[chuckles]

- So what are they speaking?

- They're just saying words that sound like Spanish.

- Wabuzito schmugarra.

- Bingo dingo. [chuckles]

Vamanka, carrando. [chuckles]

- Schwigarro. [utters rapid gibberish]

[chuckles]

Señorito Van Driessando es el suckador.

- Sí, suckamente.

[chuckling]

- Butt-iendo.

- Sí, sí. Butt-ería!

[chuckles]

- I'll have two BW burgers, one with no cheese,

two fries, a Diet Coke, and a Coke.

- Biendondo al mondo del hamboorger.

[chuckles]

- What?

- Uh, como disero por digestamente?

Por favor. [chuckles]

- I don't understand you.

- Micasa del planas garara a dornde hamboorgergo.

Y bingo del el dingo. [chuckles]

- I speak Spanish, and I-- I don't understand you either.

- Abara carrero.

Quiere siandra, drivar through.

[chuckles]

- Hi. Could I get a nine-piece BW nuggets

and an iced tea? - Whoa.

Butt-Head, esa chica es una boner-ador.

[chuckles] - What?

- Uh, oye, bebe. [chuckles]

Tu me constructa el boner grande.

[chuckles]

- Do you speak English?

- El boi-oi-oing del peenador. [chuckles]

- OK, I'm just gonna go.

- Uh, Butt-Head, no scoro.

[chuckles] - No.

Nunca no scoro. - Sí, sí.

No scoro sucko. [chuckles]

- Bingo dingo. [chuckles]

- So I tried to send you to

English as a second language class,

but they said no because you don't seem

to have a first language, mm-kay?

- El zubrando? - Sí, sí, el zubrando padoo.

[chuckles]

- But I need you to remember English

before you bring down our standardized test scores

even further, mm-kay? So I'm gonna try this myself.

So this is a pencil.

Can you say pencil?

- Uh, no compringo. [chuckles]

- No, no, no. No. [chuckles]

[utters rapid gibberish]

- Mm-kay. This is a desk.

Desk?

- Uh, qué? [chuckles]

- No scoro. No scoro nunca.

[chuckles]

- OK. Can you say any English word?

Are there any English words you remember?

Any at all?

- Uh, shuh...

schlong. [chuckles]

- Schlong. [chuckles]

- Schlong, schlong. [chuckles]

Aquí schlong. [chuckles]

- OK, yes.

But do you remember any other words?

- Mm, um, buh, buh-tuh--

butt? [chuckles]

- Uh... [sighs]

that's not really the kind of word I'm looking for,

but, sure. - Uh, dumb.

Uh, dumb ass.

Dumbass, dumbass. - Oh.

Oh, yeah, um, uh, spank--

spank, uh, my-- my monkey.

I want to spank my monkey. I want to spank-a my monkey.

- Sí, sí.

Beavis is, uh, an ass wipe.

I banged his mom. - Yes!

I compringo the English. [chuckles]

- OK, OK. Now what about pencil?

- Uh, can you, like, shut up? [chuckles]

- Seriously, yeah. [chuckles]

What's wrong with this butthole?

[chuckles] Sí.

[chuckling]

- Qué suckamente.

[hard rock music]