Original subtitles

And now, here they are, the most daredevil group of daffy drivers to ever

whirl their wheels in the wacky races, competing for the title of the world's

wackiest racers. The cars are approaching the starting line. First is

the turbo terrific driven by Peter Perfect.

Next, Rufus Roughcut and Sawtooth in the Buzzwagon.

Maneuvering for position is the Army Surplus Special. Right behind is the Ant

Hill Mob in their bulletproof bombs.

And there's ingenious inventor Pat Penney in his converter car.

Oh, and here's the lovely Penelope Pitstop, the glamour gal of the gas

pedal. Next, we have the Bowler Mobile with the Slag Brothers, Rock and Gravel.

Lurching along is the Creepy Coop with the Gruesome Susum. And right on their

tail is the Red Max.

And there's the Arkansas Chuggabug with Root and Blubber Bear.

Sneaking along last is that mean machine with those double-dealing dew batters,

Nick Dastardly and his sidekick, Buckley.

And even now, they're up to some dirty trick, and they're off to a standing

start. And why not? They've been chained to a post by Shifty Dick Dastardly, who

shifts into the wrong gear. And away they go on the way out wacky races.

Today's wacky races rally, led by number five, Penelope Pitstop, takes the

contestants through a twisting route.

from Slipover, New Jersey, to the finish line at Ups and Downs. That's Dick

Dastardly there, plotting his daily dirty deeds.

If I stop them here, I will win the race.

The Arkansas Chugabug, car number eight, beats his motor, HRP.

Hot, roasted peanuts for more power.

Wow, listen to that motor hum.

That's quite a powerful motor you've got there, Luke.

Yep. And it costs only peanuts to run.

As the Arkansas Chugabug shoots ahead, the Slag Brothers in car number one

start to make their pitch to regain third place.

And they go into super clobber club power and

find themselves in need of extensive body and fender repair.

These slags are hard competitors.

All right?

Sorry.

And car number one is back in the rack of wings.

Oh, I mean the wacky race.

Professor Pat pending the purpose to go ahead by shifting the sail power.

It looks like he'll win this fighting race in a breeze.

But the creepy coot blows up a storm.

It's an ill wind and blows no good for the professor.

The dastardly has managed to sneak into the lead, but now the other cars are

closing in.

We have to stop them, my dear.

Perhaps some small dastardly will do.

A little realistic paint job.

And presto, we have a realistic chasm in the road.

Now you can place that bridge out warning sign, Muttley.

Here they come.

No one stopped.

They went right on through.

Well, so can me.

And the wacky beat goes on as popular Peter Perfect

makes a play for pretty Penelope Pitstop, who has just washed out a few

things and hung them out to dry.

Number four, the Red Max, finally, ain't believed, takes to the air, but finds

that clothes and propellers don't fix.

Holiday amusement park.

This gives me a despicable idea, Muttley.

Say, Dastardly, you can't go into that amusement park.

It's closed.

Well, I'm opening it for a special Wacky Races surprise party.

Fetch the tools, Muttley.

Here they come, Muttley.

I'll work these inside controls.

While you throw the road switch we build.

All aboard for the roller coaster!

All aboard for the Matterhorn.

Dodge them, Ferris wheel, merry-go-round, and all points east.

Something tells me we took a wrong turn.

Hey, Gerson, let's stop for a little seance with our friend.

That ought to hold them. And should we win the race today, Muttley?

Hold on, you dastardly villain.

Double rat. It's the Professor.

He's tricky.

Let's get out of here.

He's going to get a quick kick out of this gadget.

Janet, we'll give you a lift.

Now to help the others to get in the race.

The army surplus special trying to make up for lost time goes into super

percolator power.

Wow! Look at him percolating in the first place.

Spoonman's rough gunning car number 10 decides to maneuver his bus wagon. So he

can block Peter Perfect in number 9, the Turbo Terrific.

I say, old chap, would you mind pulling over so I may pass?

He wants a break, does he?

Okay.

Oh, well.

Two wheels are better than nothing.

This wire across the road will stop them.

Brace yourself, Muttley.

Here they come!

Muttley!

The wackiest of wacky races finds car number two, the Creepy Hoop, creeping

along in last place.

So they decide to shift into Dragon Wheel Power.

And away he goes, looking like a winner as he passes the Slag Brothers.

Peter Perfect, the Red Bats, the Arkansas Chugabug, Penelope Pitstop, the

Surplus Six, and it looks like he'll take the lead away from the Angel Mob in

car number seven.

It's going to pass us, Clyde. Not if I go in to revise.

Uh-oh, the Creepy Coop returns to last place.

This scheme is so dastardly, it even scares me.

Listen. When I throw this basketball through the basket, it'll fall and hit

the button on the harpoon gun, sending the harpoon with a steel ball tied to it

over the highway and stick in the door of that cement trough. The steel ball

will swing and open the door, sending an avalanche of quick-drying cement.

Down on the highway.

Here goes!

Drat! I missed the basket.

And there goes the ball.

Hmm. What can I use for a substitute?

Sorry, Butley.

You're it.

Remember now, keep your head down and your tail in.

Yay, team!

Not here, you silly cement!

Mutley!

Well, don't just stand there, Mutley. Find a chisel and get me out.

Going into the homestretch, we find the army surplus special in the lead.

Hey, Sarge, looks like a roadblock just inside of the finish line.

I'll ride through it!

Is that Bromford you saw?

What do you think?

Now head for that finish line and step on it. So while Private Meekly follows

the sergeant's orders and steps on the finish line, Red Max in car number four

crosses the line and is declared the winner.

The Smythe brothers are second and the Arkansas Chukabug is third.

Do something.

Get me out.

Oh, no.

No, no. Not that way.

Thanks for nothing.