Original subtitles

-> 01:00:44,349 You catch that Reds game last night?

-Oh, I sure did. Yeah. Uh-huh.

-[ Laughs ] -Yeah.

-I mean, shit -- um, pardon my -- my language.

Um, dang! I mean, that was something, huh?

-It was something. Yeah. All right.

It's good to see you. Take care, okay, Jack?

-All right. Yep.

-Bye, Jack. -Bye, now.

-See ya.

[ Nail guns clicking ]

[ Insects chirping ]

-Trevor. I'm an addict.

-Hey, Trevor. -Hey, Trevor.

-I actually was married for a while,

and both me and my wife went down the wrong paths.

Neither one of us could say no.

And we basically fueled each other

to continue to do drugs until it got to the point

to where I made a decision in my life to --

to get better for my kids.

I have three daughters.

I mean, I've been clean three years now,

and I still feel bad when I look at my kids

because I think at the time that I didn't have with them.

But I can say that I got full custody of my girls.

I've been clean for three years.

-[ Applause ] -And they're with me now,

and I coach their T-ball team and their softball team,

and I absolutely love my girls to death.

-That's awesome. -So keep in there, guys.

Keep working hard, okay?

Get yourself around good people.

-Yes. -Good people.

Like you said, it's people, places, and things, for sure.

For sure. I pass.

-Thanks, Trevor. -Thanks, Trevor.

-I knew Trevor when he was a baby.

Me and his mom were, like, really, really good friends.

So sometimes, like, sitting here, I'm embarrassed,

because, you know, I'm the mom.

I have kids his age,

and it's embarrassing for me at this age to be an addict.

So when I seen him --

And I never really knew your story, so...

But I know your mom and dad are very proud of you,

and I see all the pictures of all your girls.

So congratulations, buddy.

-Thank you. -You're welcome.

Now I'm here -- I'm almost --

I'll have my six months next month, so, I mean...

-Nice. -That's a big deal.

-Keep coming. Keep coming.

-Working to get my family back, so with that, I pass.

-Thanks, Shannon. -Thank you, Shannon.

-Love you. -I'm Cody, and I'm an addict.

-Hey, Cody. -Hey, Cody.

-Um...

Well, I guess...

there's something I've been thinking about.

Um, my mom used to call me a hurricane.

And, um...

Which I never really understood what it meant,

and, um...I guess doing this,

I'm, like, starting to see it a little bit more.

Um...I was the first person to give my brother heroin.

My brother Jack, seven years ago.

Um, he's not my real brother. He's my, uh, foster brother.

But t was never really like that when we were growing up.

It was never really, like, different.

And, um...

...he and my sister, like, were really close for a while.

I guess they just have, uh,

personalities that click, you know?

And, um, I was kinda...

...really breaking into her house a lot, you know?

Stealing stuff, and, um...

...I would use her place to go and shoot up

when I didn't have, like, anywhere else to go.

She kicked me out a lot. [ Clears throat ]

Um...

And she found out about Jack using

when she found us in her bathroom.

And I guess we were in pretty bad shape, and, um...

...she called an ambulance.

And, um...

Sorry.

-You're all right. -It's all right.

-Wasn't until I came around a little bit later

and saw her looking at Jack in the hospital bed...

...I kind of realized, you know, um...

I'd just never really seen her like that before.

So it made me think, and, um...

I think just doing this and...

...going to meetings and talking about it,

it's the first time I've really, like,

seen it in a different way, you know?

So...um, yeah, I'm just trying to work it out.

Um, with that, I pass.

-Thanks, Cody. -We're glad you're here.

[ Knock on door ]

[ Birds chirping ]

-Hey.

-Hi.

Just wondered if I could come in and just say hi.

-You want to try to put that in there?

-I'm gonna put this.

-I like this.

[ Toy rattling, clicks ]

-I connected.

-Hey. You did. Nice.

You ever tried eating it without a spoon?

-No.

-You've never seen that?

Check this out. Ready?

[ Laughs ] You want to try?

There you go.

[ Laughs ]

One time when I was little, I got it all over my face.

I looked like Casper the Friendly Ghost.

-Who is that?

-You don't know who Casper is? -No.

-You've never seen Casper the Friendly Ghost?

-No. Mnh-mnh.

-You never showed her that?

-No.

-Oh.

-All right. -You'd love it.

-I think it's bedtime, Miss Harley.

Now that you're all sugared up.

Perfect time for bed.

Say thank you for all the burgers and the wood.

You got some good work done.

All right.

-I'll see you soon.

[ Water running ]

[ Footsteps approaching ]

-Found those the other day.

I think it's like his fifth birthday party or something.

-I think you're right.

Have you heard from him?

-Mm-hmm.

-How's he doing?

-Uh, he's good.

He says he's back on the path to graduating.

This summer, I think.

Um, he's working at a kitchen down there.

Seems like he likes it.

He asked about you.

He said he'd tried to call.

-What'd you tell him?

-I didn't know.

-I know you and me, um, never really, like...

Maybe you didn't want to hear from me.

But I want to tell you that I'm sorry.

Been going to a lot of these meetings and, um...

...seeing it all...

...a lot of the stuff that happened.

And, um...

Yeah, best I can do is take, like,

a really close look at it and...

...make sure you know that I'm sorry.

-I just don't know what you want me to say.

-I don't either.

I just wanted to tell you and make sure you knew.

-I think that there's just...

...a lot that I cannot understand.

And there's just a lot that I do not know how to forgive.

[ Insects chirping, vehicles passing in distance ]

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

[ Music continues ]

[ Music continues ]

-All right. Let's see.

[ Ratchet clicking ]

[ Dog barking in distance ]

[ Engine starts ]

That's working. [ Chuckles ]

-[ Laughs ]

-It worked.

[ Urinating ]

[ Toilet flushing ]

-You've been with us now four months,

and, you know, we're kind of looking back at the calendar.

Uh, doing well. Doing your meetings.

You know, you're a good example

for the new people coming in.

How do you feel about where you're at in your recovery?

-Um, yeah, I think pretty good.

-We think so, too.

The judge thinks so.

Matter of fact, he'd like to promote you to phase two.

-Really? -Yeah. Absolutely.

So you need to work on a letter.

Bring it to court on Monday.

-Okay.

Thanks.

[ Down-tempo hip-hop playing ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

[ Phone buzzing ]

What is it?

-They found him in the employee restroom

at McKinley's before his shift was about to start.

It was fentanyl.

An ambulance was called,

and they tried to resuscitate him there

and again numerous times on the way to the hospital,

which is where he passed away.

-[ Inhales deeply, sobs ]

-I'm so sorry for your loss.

-Okay. Thank you.

Thank you.

[ Birds chirping ]

[ Nail gun clicking ]

[ Insects chirping ]

[ Train passing ]

[ Engine stops ]

[ Chimes ringing ]

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

[ Music continues ]

[ Insects chirping ]

[ Line ringing ]

[ Phone ringing ]

-Hello?

-[ Sniffles, exhales deeply ]

-Cody?

[ Insects chirping ]

[ Sobs softly ]

-I'm so sorry.

-Everybody said he was doing so well.

-He was. He was.

-I just...

I didn't think it was gonna end up this way.

-[ Softly ] I know.

You know, one of the things I've learned

over the years doing this is that...

it's never really anyone's fault.

It's not Jack's fault.

It's not my fault.

It's not your fault.

I know that's hard to believe, but it's true.

Cody, I'm gonna stay on the phone with you

as long as you need me to.

I'm here.

I'm not going anywhere.

[ Birds chirping ]

-[ Exhales deeply, sniffs ]

[ Engine starts ]

[ Vehicle approaching ]

-[ Exhales deeply ] Man.

[ Engine stops ]

[ Paper crinkling ]

-[ Clears throat ] I'm writing this letter

to begin phase two of Adult Recovery Court.

I'd like to start by thanking the judge,

Jim, Eric, Mandy, Gary, Annette, peer support,

and everyone else who has helped me get to this point.

You really care about us and our recovery.

You want us to do better for ourselves

and for the people around us, and that means a lot.

I'd also like to thank

the other participants in the program

for setting a good example for me to follow

and supporting me when I thought about giving up

or I didn't want to be here.

This is a day...

Sorry.

This is a day I didn't think I'd get to.

My brother Jack should be standing up here.

I accept that that's not possible...

...and that's something I can't change.

But with the support of you all,

I have the courage to keep going

and to change the things I can.

In phase two, I will work towards getting my own place

and finding a sponsor.

I will continue to rebuild my trust

with -- with people and my family.

I hope I can be a better brother, a better uncle,

and a better friend moving forward

and someone who people can rely on.

This is definitely the hardest thing I've ever done,

but I'm grateful to be here.

I'm gonna keep working. Thank you.

-That's great. -Whoo!

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

-I know you worked real hard at it, Cody,

and, uh, you've done a great job here in this phase.

And so the court is promoting you to phase two.

Congratulations.

-Great job.

Here. We got a little something for you.

There's your certificate.

-Thanks. Thank you.

-See you in a few weeks. -Thank you. Appreciate it.

-Devonte.

[ Music continues ]

-Hey, buddy.

-[ Whispering indistinctly ]

-No, I think you're fine.

-How you doing, Devonte? -Good.

-That's good. How was your weekend?

-Um, my weekend was all right. The kids are...

[ Music builds, continues ]