Original subtitles

Wow! That was close. I nearly queered the whole deal.

This is a crazy idea, Wilma. I'm ashamed of myself.

Let's get out of here.

Okay, but we better glue your mustache back on

in case somebody sees us on the way out.

Yabba-dabba-doo!

♪ Flintstones, meet the Flintstones ♪

♪ They're the modern Stone age family ♪

♪ From the town of Bedrock ♪

♪ They're a page right out of history ♪

♪ Let's ride with the family down the street ♪

♪ Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet ♪

♪ When you're with the Flintstones ♪

♪ Have a yabba-dabba-doo time A dabba-doo time ♪

♪ We'll have a gay old time ♪

Does it smell good, Dino? It's Fred's favorite.

Roast loin of stegosaurus.

Hmm. Needs a little rock salt.

Hmm. Out of salt. Better put it on my list.

Maybe you could have the bone, Dino. That is if you've been a good boy.

Have you been a good boy?

Okay. You can't be much better than that.

- Hi, Wilma. I'm home. - Hi, dear.

- Ooh. What's in the box? Is it for me? - Well, in a way, yeah.

Hurry and open it, Fred. I can hardly wait.

Dino, take it easy.

How can I open the box with you crowding me like that?

Isn't he cute? He thinks it's something for him.

Well, he's gonna be disappointed. Look, isn't it a beauty?

- It's a Water Buffalo hat. - The best that money can buy.

- Isn't there anything else in the box? - Uhn-uhn, uhn-uhn, uhn-uhn.

Fred, that's not fair.

I asked you if it was for me, and you said, "Yes, in a way."

Well, it is for you in a way.

You want me to look nice at lodge meetings, don't you?

- Oh, brother. - What's the matter, Wilma?

- You sore about something? - No, no, I'm not sore.

But I don't think you should be spending money for a new lodge hat

when your old one is perfectly good.

It's getting shabby.

Besides, if Barney can buy a new lodge hat, why can't I?

Barney bought a new one, too?

Sure, but you can bet his wife isn't bawling him out

for spending the money.

And I don't think you should spend good money on a new hat

when there's nothing wrong with your old one.

But, Betty, honey, it didn't cost much. Besides, Fred got a new one, too.

So? Do you have to do everything Fred does?

If he jumped in the river, I suppose you'd jump in after him.

Yeah, I guess I'd have to, Betty. You see, Fred can't swim.

Oh, for heaven's sake.

Aww. Isn't that cute? She wants more cactus juice.

She just loves it.

Now, look at your picture book while Mommy and Daddy finish their dinner.

Oh. That's a picture of a man building a house, Pebbles.

And that's his hammer. He pounds with it.

And that's a saw. It cuts through things.

Like a...

Uh... Like that, Pebbles.

Only not nearly so fast.

A saw could take lessons from your daddy.

- Fred, don't eat so fast. - Huh? Oh. Oh, sorry, honey.

But I had to hurry and finish so I won't be late for the lodge meeting.

- Lodge meeting? Tonight? - Uh-huh. And I'm gonna wear my new hat.

But, Fred, I was hoping we could go to the movies.

The Monster from the Tar Pits is playing tonight.

Sorry, honey, but my lodge meetings come first.

- I'd better start getting ready. - Fred, I don't like this a bit.

You're always going to lodge meetings and I have to stay home with nothing to do.

Nothing to do? Why, you got plenty to do, Wilma.

There are the dishes to wash, Pebbles to put to bed

things to iron, garbage disposal needs fixing.

Boy, I wish I had as much to occupy my free time as you have.

Why don't you take me with you to the lodge meeting?

Take you? Honey, you know I can't do that.

The Water Buffalo bylaws expressly forbid a woman even setting foot inside the lodge.

- Can't you change the bylaws? - No.

- Why not? - Because the bylaws say

you can't change the bylaws.

Hello, Wilma.

- Greetings, Brother Flintstone. - Greetings, Brother Rubble.

And now, for the Water Buffalo handshake.

Cut that out, you two.

Yes, you'd better be quiet, or the bylaws will get you.

Don't mind Wilma, Barney.

She's just sore because she can't go to the lodge meeting with us.

Yeah, Betty feels the same way.

She can't understand why women aren't allowed.

See?

Well, don't look at me. I didn't write the bylaws.

Goodbye, honey. Be a good girl, Pebbles.

Come on, Barney, let's go.

Cut that out.

You better kiss him, too, Fred. Remember what the vet said.

If we don't treat Dino like one of the family, he'll feel rejected.

Oh. All right.

Yuck.

Oh, boy, what I go through for the mental welfare of my family.

- Oh, Fred. - Now, what?

I want you to suggest that wives be allowed

to accompany their husbands to the meetings.

Wilma, please, be reasonable.

Fred, it can't hurt to suggest it. Promise me you will.

Well, all right, if I get a chance.

Thanks, dear.

How about that, Barney?

Now, our wives want to attend lodge meetings.

Yeah, well, as the old saying goes,

"You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink."

Now, what's that got to do with our wives wanting to go to lodge meetings?

Well, nothing really.

I just felt I ought to keep up my end of the conversation.

Oh, boy.

All hail our Grand Poobah!

And a woo-a-wah to you, too, gentlemen.

We will start the meeting with a report from our treasurer.

The lodge is broke.

The following members have not paid their dues.

I think we should really consider...

In order to save time, I will just read the names of those who have paid their dues.

Brother James McFossil and Brother Sam Slagheap.

- Thank you, Brother McFossil. - Not at all, Brother Slagheap.

And now I will welcome suggestions for the improvement of the lodge.

Fred, now's the time to keep your promise to Wilma.

You know, suggest that we let our wives come to the meetings.

Gosh, Barney, you think I should?

Well, like Wilma said, "It can't hurt to suggest it."

Yeah, okay, I'll suggest it.

- I got a suggestion. - I got a suggestion.

Just a minute, please. One at a time.

Brother Quartz?

- I suggest that... - Wait a minute. I had my hand up first.

- What? You did not. - Yes, I did.

The minute the Poobah said, "any more suggestions" up went my hand, fast.

Yeah, but not fast enough 'cause my hand was already up.

Yeah? Now, listen, Quartz...

That's enough, Brother Flintstone!

Now, go ahead, Brother Quartz. What is your suggestion?

I suggest that we allow our wives to attend our meetings.

- What're you trying to do? - Down with Quartz!

Throw him out!

Now, Brother Flintstone, we are ready to hear your suggestion.

I...

Gosh, in all the confusion, I guess I forgot it.

Sorry I got in so late last night, Wilma, but we had a long meeting.

I understand, Fred. By the way, how was the meeting?

It was okay.

Did you suggest that wives be allowed to attend meetings?

Well, it was suggested, yeah.

What was the result?

A fractured collarbone and three cracked ribs.

- What? - Believe me, Wilma,

there isn't a chance in a million that wives will ever be allowed in the lodge.

- You better forget all about it. - Well.

I think the lodge is making a big mistake.

- Wives would help liven things up. - You may be right, Wilma.

Just mentioning wives last night caused more excitement than we've had

at a meeting in years.

Ah. That was a good dinner, sweetheart.

- I certainly enjoyed it. - I'm glad you did, Fred.

It's always a pleasure to cook for someone who appreciates it.

Yeah, that's what my mother used to say.

No, Fred, no bones. Don't put bones in the disposal.

Oop. I'm sorry, Wilma.

- I forgot. - He forgot.

Maybe a nice big plumbing bill would help his memory.

Well, what should we do tonight, Fred?

You know, it's so long since we've been out dancing.

Can't tonight, Wilma. There's a lodge meeting.

Again? But you just had a meeting last night.

I know, but this is special, Wilma.

A lot of out-of-town members will be there. I just have to attend.

Fred, I'm getting pretty tired of this.

Every time I want to go out, you have to go to a lodge meeting.

Be reasonable, Wilma. I was home every night last week

except Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday.

- You want me to be a recluse? - Oh, boy. I give up.

Hi, Wilma. How now, Brother Flintstone?

How now, Brother Rubble? Put her there.

Hi, Wilma. You look like I feel.

Yeah, I've got those "my man is a Water Buffalo" blues.

Will you cut that out?

The idea of two grown men making a noise like that.

Honestly, I'm worried about you two.

We have to make that noise, Wilma. It says so in the bylaws.

That's right, Wilma. Article 219, Section 4.

And I quote, "When two or more Water Buffalo meet..."

Barney.

That's classified information intended only for Water Buffalo ears.

Ooh. Sorry, Fred.

Time to go.

- Do you have to leave so soon? - Yup.

It's a very special meeting and we wanna get there real early.

We don't want to miss anything.

- Right, Fred? - Right, Barney.

The earlier we get there, the better.

Woo-a-wah!

Yeah, and the later we stay, the better. Wah-a-woo!

You said it.

Wilma, don't wait up for me, honey. Good night.

Ditto, Betty.

- Shall we be off, Brother Rubble? - I'm with you, Brother Flintstone.

- Well? - Well...

Know a good lawyer?

Maybe we could sue the Grand Order of Water Buffaloes for alienation of affections.

Yeah. I wonder how real water buffaloes spend their evenings.

Do you suppose they leave their wives at home in the swamp

while they go to human being meetings?

They probably do.

All males are the same whether they're men, water buffaloes, or hoot owls.

- By the way, where's Bamm-Bamm? - Home with the babysitter.

I thought Barney and I were going out together

until he lowered the Water Buffalo boom.

Yeah... Well, we have the whole evening ahead of us.

How about some two-handed rocknasta?

Okay, if you're sure the excitement won't be too much for us.

- Well, that's another game for me. - You're hot tonight.

Oops! I'm terribly sorry, Wilma. I've spilled cactus cola all over your table.

Don't worry about it, Betty. It won't stain.

That's right. I'm resistant to stains, burns, chipping...

Hey, what's Formica got that I haven't got?

I wonder what our ever-loving Water Buffaloes are doing right now.

I wish I knew.

I'd give anything to see what goes on at those meetings.

So would I. But the only way a woman could get into that lodge hall

would be to fall in, out of an airplane.

Yeah, or sneak in, wearing a disguise.

- What did I say? - You said, "Or sneak in, wearing a..."

Wilma!

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

I think I'm thinking what you're thinking.

And if we're each thinking what the other is thinking

let's not just sit here thinking.

I'll get Barney's extra hat.

Right. Betty, may I leave Pebbles with your babysitter?

Sure, get her and I'll take her over.

Come on, Pebbles, honey, you're going bye-bye.

Aunt Betty's gonna take you to see Bamm-Bamm.

I'll be right back, Wilma.

Okay, and while you're gone, I'll dig up a couple of Fred's old suits.

What are you making with your building boulders, Bamm-Bamm?

That's a butterfly. Isn't it pretty?

Do you want it? Oh. I'll try to catch it for you.

Oh. I'm afraid I can't reach it.

Oh! My goodness.

You certainly are the strongest baby in the world.

Bamm-Bamm, put Mrs. Sitstone down.

I've brought you another customer.

Look who's here, Bamm-Bamm.

Bamm! Bamm! Bamm!

He always does that when he sees Pebbles.

I won't be very late, Mrs. Sitstone. Goodbye.

Are you sure Fred won't miss these suits?

He discarded these long ago.

I just never got around to sending them to the Stonebroke Mission.

Boy, these scissors sure are dull.

So, I'm dull?

Well, everybody can't be the life of the party.

There. Now, I'll take it in in the back, like I did mine.

Hold it. Hold it.

I'm supposed to look like a lodge member, not Gina Load-a-bricks.

- There, how's that? - Ooh. Much better.

And now, for the finishing touch.

- What is that? - A mustache.

- How do I look? - Like Betty Rubble with a mustache.

How do I look?

You look like a wife who's gonna try to sneak into her husband's lodge meeting.

Oh. We'll be all right as long as we keep our hats on.

You said it. If we lose our hats, we're dead.

Password.

Um, uh, uh, um...

Come on, give the password.

Why, um...

- Give the password! - It's...

Password.

Ack-ack-a-dack. Dack-dack-a-ack.

Enter, Brother.

Ack-ack-a-dack. Dack-dack-a-ack.

Ditto.

- So far, so good. - Yeah, just keep your fingers crossed.

Woo-a-wah, woo-a-wah.

Woo-a-wah.

You two must be out-of-town members.

Yes, we're from out of town.

- In fact, we're way out. - On a limb, that is.

Well, it's nice to have you with us. I'm Brother MacBoulder.

I'm Brother Smithstone and this is Brother Johnstone.

Glad to meet you.

Come on, let's get seats while the getting's good.

If you don't mind, we'd rather just stand in the back.

- We may have to leave in a hurry. - Why?

Because Brother Johnstone's wife is expecting a baby.

- She is? - I mean, yeah, she is.

Why, that's wonderful. Congratulations, Brother.

Trouble, he knocked my mustache loose.

Uh-oh.

You go ahead and get a seat, Brother MacBoulder. We'll see you later.

Okay, brothers.

We've got to find some place where you can glue that back on.

Excuse me, brother, can you direct me to the ladies' room?

Ladies' room?

Ladies' room!

That's a good one. That is funny.

Brother Flintstone, you wanna hear a funny one?

Huh? Oh, sure, Brother Shortstone.

Let's go. Fast.

- What's so funny? - This'll kill you. These two guys here...

Hey, where'd they go?

Wow! That was close. I nearly queered the whole deal.

This is a crazy idea, Wilma. I'm ashamed of myself.

Let's get out of here.

Okay, but we better glue your mustache back on

in case somebody sees us on the way out.

All right, brothers, we have a lot to do tonight.

So, will you all take seats? Thank you.

There, that'll hold. Come on, let's go.

You guys, where you going? The Poobah wants everybody seated.

- But, uh... - Come on, I'll find you some seats.

We're gonna cut the business part of the meeting short

so we can get right to the fun.

But first, I'd like to read a message from Brother Quartz.

He's recovering nicely and he's sorry he ever made that suggestion

about our wives attending the meetings...

He ought to be sorry. Any guy who'd suggest that

ought to be run out of town as well as the lodge.

Uh, uh...

- Uh, boo for Brother Quartz. - Yeah, boo Brother Quartz.

All right, we will now recite the Water Buffalo creed.

Please rise and remove your hats.

- Remove our hats? - We can't do that.

Time to go. Follow me.

We are proud to be a Buffalo, the kind that likes the water.

- We joined the Water Buffaloes -Excuse me. Excuse me.

- Because we knew we ought to. - Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Phew. We made it.

Hi, fellas. Are you going to be initiated, too?

- Initiated? - Yes.

They told us everybody who's to be initiated was to wait in here.

Us? Uh, uh...

Who's us?

There were two other fellas with me but they got scared and went out that window.

I never saw two fellas move so fast.

No? Well, just watch us.

Okay, you would-be Buffaloes the three of you line up.

- But, sir, we're not... - Quiet! Initiates must be silent.

All right, forward march.

To become full-time Water Buffaloes you men

must prove you possess the right qualities.

First, Water Buffaloes must have tender hearts.

Ouch.

Okay, Poobah, I'd say they're tender enough now.

Second, a Water Buffalo must be strong.

Begin the test of strength.

They're beating us. We'll have to pull harder.

Did you ever see such dirty Water Buffaloes?

We gotta do something about that. Look over here.

Do you still want to know what they do at lodge meetings?

And now, the endurance test.

New candidates, you will race our champions Brothers Flintstone and Rubble,

to the end of the hall and back.

If you lose you must pay the penalty.

- When he says "go"... - Yeah, I know.

Keep right on going.

Ready, set, go!

- Getting tired? - I sure am,

but not tired enough to sit down.

We took an awful beating tonight. Do you know that?

Oh.

I'm as painfully aware of it as you are.

But let's be honest, Betty, we deserved everything we got.

I guess you're right.

We had no business sneaking into their lodge meeting.

Hi, girls. Nice of you to stay up for us.

- We didn't have a choice. - We had to stay up.

- How was the meeting? - All right.

Except a couple of cowards ruined the initiation by chickening out.

That's a shame.

Well, come on, Barney, let's go home. Good night, Wilma.

- Good night, Betty. - See you tomorrow, folks.

Fred, Betty and I have decided...

We don't want to go to your lodge meetings after all.

Now, you're showing sense, Wilma.

Women just don't belong at lodge meetings.

In fact, no woman has ever set foot inside our lodge hall and never will.

Good for you, Fred.

- Well, I'm going to bed. - Good night, Wilma darling.

Good night, Fred. And a happy ack-ack-a-dack to you.

Thank you, sweetheart.

That's our secret password.

Wilma, where did you learn that?

We have ways of finding things out.

The hard way.

♪ Flintstones, meet the Flintstones ♪

♪ They're the modern Stone Age family ♪

♪ From the town of Bedrock ♪

♪ They're a page right out of history ♪

♪ Someday, maybe Fred will win the fight ♪

♪ Then that cat will stay out for the night ♪

♪ When you're with the Flintstones ♪

♪ Have a yabba-dabba-doo time A dabba-doo time ♪

♪ We'll have a gay old time ♪

♪ We'll have a gay old time ♪

Wilma!