Original subtitles

El Ksour, Tunisia, 5th April 1943

The Vultures

Disembark!

You're dismissed.

Retreat at once!

Stairs!

And now? What do we do?

We continue the mission.

What about the heavy losses...?

What's that, soldier? Heavy losses, you say?

Only 90% of us were wiped out.

For Warrant Officer Mahuzard, anything less than 100% is relative.

Don't you think our relative losses...

...merit a little explanation?

There's your explanation.

Our mission is to seize the gold in that bank...

...load it onto a truck and get it to Sfax. And that's final.

It's funny, but even amid shell holes...

...in a square lying in ruins, a bank is still tantalising.

Brigadier B�ral, Second Company, Colonial Army, Mercier Battery.

- And where is your battery? - Completely destroyed, sir.

We more than held our own,

...and even staved off three attacks and destroyed a tank...

...before a Stuka bomber came in low hit us. The bastard.

He came in low. I ended up on my ass in a ditch.

Ever been pelted by a Stuka? It's hell.

A very efective aircraft. We should have bought a few.

Screw the krauts, they don't impress me.

We can pin their balls to the wall...

...but our weapons are in the truck.

I'll go out there when the sun goes down.

I'll need another man.

OK, gentlemen who's coming with me?

Thanks.

Until recently, when you asked a Legionnaire...

...to step forward, they all did.

Times have changed, my dear �douarde.

You mean "time have changed Warrant Officer". So have the Legionnaires.

You're right, Warrant Officer.

Tally it up: thirty Legionnaires dead in two minutes. They've changed alright.

Just shut your trap.

- What do the artillerymen think? - They have no opinion whatsoever on the matter.

I'm not a Legionnaire, this doesn't concern me.

Besides, if you must know, I was about to be discharged.

Discharged? Imagine that! What for?

I have to go nonstop, sir.

-Go where? -I, er...

...think I have dysentery.

- Why not call it the runs? - That'd mean he had the trots.

That he's scared shitless.

But dysentery is a medically recognized term.

Aren't you acting stupid?

Attention!

When addressing a superior, assume the proper stance.

And refer to him by rank:

"Aren't you acting stupid, Sergeant Augagneur?"

Go ahead, grovel.

- What's he doing? - He doesn't know.

We can't control him at night, he's someone else.

- What's that? - He puts make-up on before he goes out in the evening.

What should your epitath say, sir?

I think something like this:

"Warrant Officer Mahuzard, First Batallion, Foreign Legion.

Fell in action while attempting a daring sortie in a desperate situation."

Militarily speaking, a situation is never desperate.

And that's final!

- Ready, Borzik? - Ready, sir.

- Careful, it's all that's left. - Hey Borzik...

- Will you do me a favour? - What is it?

If you come across the great man, Captain Schlotzer, spit on him.

Augagneur, don't insult your superiors, and that's final!

He claimed there were no Krauts left in El Ksour.

I can still hear him saying:

"Sergeant, this isn't a commando raid, it's an administrative escort.

Tonight we'll screw the hookers in Sfax."

I dunno if we'll get to Sfax, but I know who's getting screwed.

- Stop bothering the others! - And that's final!

Any idea how much gold's in that safe?

I heard Schlotzer talking...six.

Six what?

Six million. In gold bullion.

- Think what you could do with six million... - Nothing.

It's great 'cause it allows you to do nothing.

There they are!

Send up a flare!

It's no use!

Now they'll spot us!

Good. Back to square one.

No, we had three cartridge clips, now we have none.

It doesn't matter, we'd need a cannon to move 'em.

There is one.

- Wasn't your battery destroyed? - The men, but not the cannon, it works fine.

Where is it?

Next to the wall. A mere 400 metres from here.

Did you hear, Boissier?

A mere 400 metres, the Artilleryman says.

Borzik and Mahuzard weren't able to cover 50 yards, you moron!

They're out of ammunition. Send over two men.

We could surrender.

It might sound simplistic, but...

No, no, I like your idea.

- Unfortunately Legionnaires never bail out. - Since when?

U� od Camar�ne. April 30th, 1863.

Godammit.

In my dream, the cops hailed me on the Champs-Elys�es...

...and I screwed the collaborators' wives.

Looks like we'll end up being cooked in the hot sand instead.

Shit, here they are!

Only two.

You'd think they'd take us more seriously.

They've been gone 20 minutes.

There they are!

- This is stupid. - Relax, it's just an illusion.

You're SS now - a fearless killing machine!

Look straight ahead, stand up straight, and think of Adolf.

Cut the shit!

Stupid idiot.

Breathing easier now, sir?

Oh yes.

Sometimes a bad Frenchman is better than a good German.

Very true!

Auf Wiedersehen, sir.

It's over!

- Where is it? - Over there.

- Come on, it's only 200 yards away! - Sure.

- They'll have time to shoot us 200 times! - Fine, stay here.

Sure one more, one less, who cares, right? You lost 30 men in a few minutes this morning!

Since you're such a brave Legionnaire, do it yourself!

Listen to me, B�ral.

B�ral.

- You hear me? - Yes, loud and clear!

You're coming up there with me.

We need Legionnaires and artillerymen!

Remember the song... How did it go?

"When the artilleryman from Maisse leaves his garrison, the women of Maisse look on from their balcony."

Let's go!

OK B�ral.

Now show me what you can do.

I'm certain you're good at this.

Not at everything, but I know you're good at this.

I'll try.

Take your time. Concentrate.

You have to adjust the ball.

Take your time, but make sure you don't miss!

We'll make mincemeat of them, then couscous meatballs.

I like couscous.

I'll treat you to couscous after the war. You know the place in Alma?

- No, I know a good one in Clichy. - Fine, we'll go to Clichy if you prefer.

Just don't screw this up B�ral!

Hurry it up a little!

- You told me to take my time. - But not all night!

Return fire!

Come on B�ral fire!

Say, does your friend in Alma put chicken in his couscous?

- That'd be sacrilege! - My friend in Clichy adds chicken.

Then your friend's an idiot, which doesn't surprise me.

Sure, be disagreeable.

"Fourth Company, answer!"

Captain Ulrich Dieterle here.

Know why he'll go along with this?

Because he's intelligent, which makes him a realist.

I'm sure he's already thought all this out.

He was the first to enter the bank last night.

Right, B�ral?

- Talking about me? - Ah, our Warrant Officer...

We were talking about us, you, and what we plan to do.

The future, in other words.

It's important, the future.

Take Boissier here.

-His dream is to open a hotel on the coast.

But, someone like you...

...might be more interested in an agricultural project.

Invest in a beet farm, maybe.

But I have no money to invest.

No money, he says! Divide $6 million into four!

Can you multiply 12 bullets by three instead?

Maybe you should do your sums again.

It's my way. And that's final!

Sergeant Augagneur, I order you to lay down your weapons.

No more orders, Mahuzard.

And no more Sergeants or Warrant Officers.

We buried our stripes with our dead - that's finished.

We've formed a cooperative. Know what that is, a cooperative?

And you? Are you familiar with the term "execution"?

At this moment, �douard, I'm in charge of the firing squad.

Have you been out in the sun too long, or what?

You bastards actually expect me to help you rob a bank?

You get into trouble before you join the Legion...not after!

Pardon, but I'd like to remind you again that I'm not a Legionnaire.

Listen to me carefully.

Do you realise what his seedy little mind is thinking? Holdup!

Mahuzard, you don't know what you're talking about.

A holdup means violence, masks and guns.

We're not aiming any weapons...

...or uttering any threats.

But we'll grab France's gold before the Germans steal it.

Surely you appreciate our patriotic fervour!

And how do you cretins plan to open the safe?

With a can opener? A corkscrew?

I'll be frank, Edouarde. I don't think it's polite to mock us.

It's not polite.

Gentlemen, I'd lost all hope of seeing you.

The city's been evacuated. I was headed to Luxor.

You're just in time.

My name is Francois La Roche-Fr�on.

I'm the manager of this bank. Or what's left of it.

Warrant Officer Mahuzard, First Batalion, Foreign Legion.

What's left of him.

We'll transport your gold to the home front.

And where would the home front be?

- For the Germans, Sfax. - Yes, yes...

I was kidding, I'm well aware.

But where's Captain Schlotzer? That's his name, isn't it? Schlotzer?

The Captain was gunned down by the Germans when we arrived.

- Ah yes, we heard the gunfire. - They got us.

Last night's artillery shots?

We got them. It's a soldiers story.

Don't you dare use that term! Not you!

- You're not soldiers, you're thieves! - There he goes again...

...the man's obsessed.

Mahuzard is a former firebrand. And an old war veteran.

He smoked opium and fornicated left and right.

He has to watch it.

Mr. La Roche-Fr�one, these men have only one thing in mind...

- Legionnaire! - Sergeant!

For having made detrimental antimilitarist statements, that threaten the morale of civilians...

- ...Warrant Officer Mahuzard will be arrested. Lock him up! - Where's that?

In the john, the cellar, wherever you like.

Come here you bastard!

Face me, you faggot!

Did you guys hear that? What's gotten into him?

Afraid to put down your gun?

Imagine that! He thinks I need a rifle to wallop a country bumpkin!

- Soldier! - Yes, Sergeant?

Sit your ass down. And don't move!

- If he tries to force the door? - Fire a warning shot.

- If he breaks it? - Shoot him.

Affirmative.

Now, Mr. Director, where were we?

I think that. . . I think that the Warrant Officer...

- You mean to say, the prisoner? - If you wish, yes.

I think that the prisoner more or less called you a thief...

- Don't tell me you believed him? - Well...

Anyway, the situation has changed considerably.

Here's what happened.

One, a Captain orders Legionnaires to travel to El Ksour,

...so they can escort gold to the home front.

Two, the Captain is killed.

Three, the Warrant Officer loses his mind.

Four, I'm second-in-command, Sergeant Augagneur.

Five, Mr. La Roche-Fr�on opens the vault.

It's like this, Sergeant. In our society...

...some people guard banks, others attack them.

I belong to the first catagory, and it's too late to change that now.

- He's starting to bug me, how about you? - A little.

Let's see how committed he is.

Watch this.

We don't want to splatter the Sergeant.

Come on, move.

Talk.

If you don't, before I count to ten, no more head.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

Six.

Seven.

Eight.

Nine.

Ten.

Shit!

Never promise what you can't deliver.

Say Sergeant, is there any grub?

Boissier just wanted brains for dish of the day.

My wife's getting impatient.

What? Your wife is here? Why didn't you say so?

Sergeant!

For your information, my wife doesn't know the combination.

Really!

Good day Madame.

Sergeant Augagneur, First Batallion, Foreign Legion.

H�lene La Roche-Fr�on. Is my husband almost finished?

It's hard to say.

A moment ago he had a gun to his head.

If I hadn't intervened,

...right now you'd be the former Mrs. La Roche-Fr�on.

The idea doesn't displease me, why the disagreement?

Things happened very quickly, you know,

The Warrant Officer shouted "Thief!" Your husband said he was the bank's guardian.

A soldier drew his gun and said, "I'm gonna blow his head off!"

Excuse me, I'm just quoting. Then you blew the horn...

Your husband said, "My wife!" I said, "I'll handle this!".

And here I am.

Sergeant!

Could you ask her if she'd happen to have some smoked salmon or quiche Lorraine?

Or maybe some lobster Thermidor for a few starving soldiers.

Come on, get in.

Wait for me in the living room.

I'll try and find what I can in the cupboards.

Know what I think, Sergeant Augagneur, First Batallion, Foreign Legion?

Yes.

My husband's refusal to talk at gunpoint doesn't surprise me.

He always says no! It's a sickness.

The one time that bonehead should have said no, he said yes.

Ten years ago in the town hall of the 6th Arrondissement.

I'm afraid I don't have lobster Thermidor,

...but would cassoulet, corned beef and a bit of wine make everyone merry?

Most certainly!

And if you happen to remember the combination for the vault we'd be even merrier.

My dear Sergeant Augagneur,

...of the First Batalion, Foreign Legion...

...is that what you came here for?

No. I came here with two ideas in mind.

That was the first.

I had something else in mind, but it won't be easy.

Feasible, but not easy.

Where the hell is he? Screw her!

Augagneur's screwing her!

What are you talking about?

I'm saying that the Sergeant is humping Mrs. La Roche-Fr�on!

For the record, that's what usually happens!

Oh no, you can't accuse someone without proof, sir.

Without proof? The whole world knows!

Since Augagneur joined the Legion,

...wives of cuckolds have been fed the same line:

"Parisian street kid, primary school at Lavallois-Perret,

...the reception centre on Anatole France Street,

Things were swell until the Krauts moved in!

They appoint a comander in his neighbourhood, the Roxy Palace becomes "Soldierten Kino"!

Are you there, B�ral?

I once heard him whining about his school playground...

...as he screwed the police chief's wife!

That bastard's got some nerve! It's his greatest asset!

It broke my heart. One fine morning the Krauts invaded Lavallois-Perret.

They set up shop in a reception hall on Anatole France Street.

They rechristened the Roxy Palace "Soldierten Kino"!

It made my blood boil. I didn't care how determined they were.

I knew one thing for sure:

When they landed in Levallois,

...they dumped on me, Augagneur, born at 18 Anatole France Street.

That's when I decided,

...I'd send them back by express mail, to Krautland, or wherever.

So you joined the Legion?

Yes, ma'am!

Why the Legion? Why not something easier?

The Legion is the most respectable.

"That was Edith Piaf performing L'Accordeoniste."

B�ral, you there?

Yes, what do you want?

Nothing, I'm fine, but aren't you doing something really dumb?

Guards aren't dumb, sir, jailbirds are.

I've never felt more intelligent.

Tell me, "intelligent"...

You actually think, you poor sap,

...that African gold will somehow become the property of Brigadier B�ral?

You must be dreaming!

Actually, sir, dreams are a private matter.

The B�rals have been butchers for generations, fathers and sons...

...so we dream like butchers.

For me that gold means a superb butchers.

I've even found the perfect spot for it, on Francois 1er Street.

My shop'll be Gypsy inspired, with chrome everywhere, white marble floors,

...a ceiling designed by Houdinu, the renowned animal painter.

It'll have cows, calves, sheep,

...and my wife, Mrs. Emilienne B�ral.

Not on the ceiling, of course.

She'll be "Emilienne, Empress of the Meat court".

After the armistice, you'll drop in and say hello, won't you?

How old's your wife?

- Twenty Nine. - Good, she'll be able to make a fresh start.

What do you mean?

I mean that all wars eventually end,

...and that when I do drop in to see you, it won't be in a meat court,

...it'll be in a court of law.

Ever hear of the permanent Military Tribunal?

Not sure...no.

How about the Military Code of Justice?

No...

Desertion and plotting in the presence of the enemy.

Insulting behavior, assault and battery against his superiors, theft, breaking and entering.

Add it all up...You'll get the death penalty, but live on in infamy.

One morning at dawn, they'll wake you up in your cell,

...drag you to an area behind the prison,

...and there, they'll blindfold you.

In the darkness you'll hear...

Ready!

Take aim!

Fire!

Are you there, B�ral?

Yes sir, I am.

And most of the time, you're not even dead.

You've got holes like a sieve, but you're not quite dead.

Then comes the coup-de-grace. Five centimetres from the skull...

...a shot right below the ear. Like in a slaughterhouse.

You'd know all about that, eh?

Is there anything else?

Yes there is.

Just after you're executed, troops file past the corpse.

All the same...

Shit! That was close!

I don't see anything.

Maybe from upstairs.

H�lene!

- H�lene! - He knows your name.

You know him?

Yes, so what? We had to endure all of them for two months.

You look tough.

H�lene!

H�lene!

H�lene!

Stop that!

Are you crazy or what?

I'll put up with your hijinks on the balconies, but not artillery shots at the house.

Your teutonic pranks might amuse your Generals, but not me!

My Generals? No more Generals.

The Generals can kiss my ass!

I just travelled 200 kilometres to see you, Mrs. La Roche-Fr�on.

Are you happy?

Then kiss me!

You know...

I've been thinking about the gold you discussed with me.

You're right we can't leave it there.

We don't intend to leave it there, don't worry.

- Who is this guy? - A friend.

Sergeant Augagneur, First Batalion, Foreign Legion.

Lieutenant Karl Brenner, 21st Panzer Division.

Excuse me.

Hands behind your back, Lieutenant.

Say!

Once you open the vault, if you can,

- ...where will you go with the gold? - I don't know.

Maybe Niger or Libya...

And where'll you hide it? Under some tree?

You take me for an idiot?

- I'll find a safe place. - Say you do...

But like all works of art and pedigree animals, gold has a verifiable history, remember that.

The bars are numbered, and those numbers will be known worldwide by all bankers and all police.

You'll have to wait before you put it into circulation. A long time, maybe.

You'll dream like a billionaire, but live like a pauper.

You'll get fed up.

To stay alive, you'll tell your story to whores and barmen.

A few months later they'll find your body in a cave, God knows where...

...in Khartoum or Bengazi.

That had a positive spin. Any other scenarios?

When my husband worked in Tunis we met a certain Bob Turner.

The guy you mentioned to me?

I'm not mentioning him to you now!

Bob Turner's in Lebanon now. Money's his speciality.

He's nicknamed "The Launderer".

He can launder the gold the way he launders money for the mafia.

Once the yellow metal turns to green paper we can divide it three ways.

- How do you work that out? - Turner, me and you.

- What about my buddies? - Your "buddies" as you call them, are accomplices according to the law.

If there's trouble, accomplices are potential eyewitnesses.

- We can't have witnesses. - You'd eliminate everybody?

- Everybody. - Imagine that.

- Not your husband too? - I said everybody.

What's wrong?

I don't get it. What the hell is a classy woman like you, a woman with brains and beauty,

...doing in a dump like this?

Time to chow down guys. Just set the table.

And prepare a cell for our prisoner.

- We were very worried, my dear. - There was really no need to worry, my dear.

What's going on here? Who's guarding who?

Where's Boissier?

Boissier's in the basement. Hands on your head.

Try as I might, that's an impossible task for me.

- Where'd you find him? - Lieutenant Karl Brenner, 21st Panzer Division.

Why were you taken prisoner?

I bumped into him on the road.

He asked me if I knew an officer named Mahuzard.

I said I did, he said that's not possible, I said it was!

Now it seems everyone in the school of war is talking about you.

Officer Mahuzard, shit! You're gonna shut your big mouth and crawl into your cell.

You piss everybody off.

Go on, you first.

Just a moment.

I forgot to tell you, B�ral. You know what you are?

Phlegm, a turd, an artilleryman.

Tell him about the coupe de grace, sir.

- You didn't feed him that old rubbish? - Certainly.

I told him about military tribunals, while you told Madame about Anatole France Street, so fair's fair.

Go on.

Stop.

Get in.

So...

What do you think of the situation?

It can only get better!

Thing is, why'd the Kraut come back to El Ksour?

You needn't worry about that B�ral.

- What'll happen to the Sergeant? - Why should you care?

Don't make me repeat what the Sergeant said about you!

Yeah, like this is all my fault...

Pay no attention Brigadier,

Warrant Officers who were once considered heroes, are becoming Freudian figures.

He's not mad at you, he's mad at the Sergeant.

Capturing a wildcat's no mean feat!

Not so long ago, you said he was a vulture.

Listen carefully, La Roche-Fr�on.

You have my respect, sir, but discussing Augagneur with a civilian burns me up.

When he was in charge of an anti-tank unit,

I saw him perform some incredible stunts.

He performed admirably this morning.

- The beef's good, right, B�ral? - Yes, really good.

Sorry I didn't heat it up.

What else? I've been eating cold meals for ten years.

Except when you dine with that tart!

- Do you really think the getlemen care? - Of course they do my dear.

You gentlemen should know that my husband never lacks in entertainment.

First there's the Saturday bridge games at the Engineer's house.

- This must be about Gilberte. - Gilberte and Jean-Pierre.

Don't you find it interesting, sirs, that...

...my husband's mistresses are usually my lovers' wives.

- Is there any wine left, Brigadier? - Right here, sir.

Maybe you thought we lived like the bourgeois of Passy.

In fact our life together is much more exotic.

Hold on to your hats,

...we're going from Money Boulevard to bamboo huts.

H�lene, shouldn't you end your foolish talk?

You should've ended it ten years ago, my dear Francois.

Virtuous soldiers, what would virtuous clients think if they knew that...

...the virtuous Director of the North Africa Banking Group...

...forces his virtuous wife to walk the streets where the locals live?

My dear child, since we're now into public confessions,

...wouldn't those streets remind you of your former profession?

Elegant.

Very elegant.

- Wait! Where are you going? - Downstairs.

You can't execute them if they starve to death first.

Agreed, but convicts can't be pampered, that's more than enough food.

Hey Romeo!

Did you know your Juliet likes to walk the streets in Medina?

- He's talking to you. - Who's that?

- Some vice squad jerk. - Tell him to go...

Speaking of which, it seems you were sensational this morning.

The grub...

You can shove it, old man.

You know you'll pounce on it when I leave.

You'll see.

When they put you away,

...you'll miss old man Mahuzard's cassoulet.

When you get thirsty just piss in the can.

And you can piss off!

Say, you really must have been sensational this morning!

Gentlemen, you can get the armoured truck.

Come on, stop drooling!

Okay.

B�ral, remove the tracks.

You should drive ahead of us, so we can see if anything happens,

...like you get a flat or the car breaks down.

We don't need trash like that.

I'm referring to the items on the car.

Right, shall we go?

Yes, just a minute.

My God!

What happened?

He must've peed on that high voltage cable, and that was it.

It happened so quickly I'm sure he didn't suffer at all.

Not at all...

It's good, for once, his dick showed sparks of life.

We can't leave him here.

Listen to me well, Mahuzard.

Boissier'll climb aboard the truck.

If you keep your cool, there'll be no problems.

Do we have a deal, Mahuzard?

Send him, you'll see.

Ok, Boissier.

There you go.

We're down to three "eyewitnesses" as you like to call everyone.

Three, is a bad number.

We need a even number.

My big mistake was sending Boissier.

I never thought Mahuzard would shoot, never.

You thought my husband would open the safe, you thought B�ral would guard Mahuzard,

...and you thought Mahuzard would keep his cool.

Because you keep goofing up,

...now you're forced to trust him.

Right, what have you decided? What do we do?

Nothing's decided yet, but H�lene thinks we should bump you off.

I hope you said no.

I haven't made up my mind yet.

Look.

This might help you make up your mind.

The Americans are here,

...next to them the French and the English are closer to Tunis.

The Italians are here, and right here are the Afrika Korps,

...which is in retreat, but must still be reckoned with.

With a little luck, if we head South,

...and hug this mountainous region,

...we'll pass right under Rommel's nose and reach Betahoua.

Once we're there, I'll introduce you to the biggest toad the world's ever known,

Alcide Kalouand�.

Ever heard of him?

You mean the "Visionary of Buganda"?

Alcide obtained the title by convincing two million followers and witch doctors in French-speaking West Africa,

...that one day he'd go to Heaven - while he was still living.

While everyone waits for the ascension, he keeps busy.

Five years ago, he started manufacturing wafers.

His churches were packed, his followers took communion.

You know what was in the wafers?

Cocaine.

Now maybe you'll trust me.

Let's call it encouraging.

In other words, forget about Bob Turner.

Turner's 5000 km away! What about fuel you stupid bitch?

Maybe you should ask your chauffeur to watch his language!

He's coming as a chauffeur, not a partner, right?

That's entirely up to you.

Luckily...you're still here.

"Kill him. Love, H�lene."

Why didn't you?

I might but like you, I haven't made up my mind yet.

This is an emotional moment, and not one for soft-heartedness.

Mrs. La Roche Fr�on, you did your share of the work,

- ...you have your share of the cake. - My share...

You call that my share? You're leaving with 10,000 kilos of gold, and I get 300?

Is that fair, you bastard?

Mrs. La Roche Fr�on, is everything a question of money?

We'll travel deep into the Dark Continent, land of the Caiman and the tse-tse fly.

Now, I ask you, is that any place for a young woman? You deserve the best.

Excuse me, duty calls.

Let's go!

Go to hell, you friggin' fags, you dirty, rotten bastards!

I hope you die!

Go and die!

The hell with her personality, I just happen to like her ass.

So maybe we should've bought her along.

What happened during the occupation of El Ksour?

- Why? H�lene didn't tell you? - I'm asking you!

I don't mean to upset you, but it was a successful occupation.

You guys lost that habit.

- How long's it been since you were in Paris? - Four years.

I was there three weeks ago on leave. You don't mind talking about this, do you?

No, no. So how was Paris?

Paris will always be Paris!

The Folies Bergeres. Zig Zig Mademoiselle. Promenades. Maurice Chevalier.

The women of Pigalle.

I think H�lene was right, I should've bumped you off!

The list of German and Italian prisoners prefigures the final victory.

While the 8th Army controls the fortification's southern tip,

...to the North, Britain's 9th Unit and France's 19th Unit are...

...mounting their final assault.

Hey,

...how do you say Zig Zig Mademoiselle in Berlin? I think we'll be there soon.

You should've told me about Berlin, we're heading elsewhere.

...we're heading in the wrong direction.

Right...

...now we need to sleep.

I'll take the first watch. When shall I wake you up?

Don't worry...

You can sleep first, if you like, I'm not really tired.

Say, Pierrot,

...did you think I might have killed you while you slept?

Why? Did I say something to make you think that?

No reason.

We'll rest, then continue, but we'll have to refuel tonight.

The engine really roars, we should be riding camels.

You see? Here...

....is where all of the German units refuel.

You shouldn't be here in case they inspect the tank.

- Get out here. - Yes?

- I'll pick you up as I leave. - Sure.

And if you miss me, I'll start hitch-hiking.

"You wouldn't happen to be going to Lavallois, dear comrade?"

You don't trust me, my friend Pierrot?

Who are you kidding? I trust everyone, Karl.

But in case you had the idea to rejoin the 21st Panzer Division,

...and to dupe Legionnaire Augagneur,

...your friend Pierrot will break your face.

Tank number 215 should normally be in the Hammamet area.

- That's a long way from here. - I'm on a special mission.

- Mission papers, please. - The mission's top-secret. There are no written orders!

One moment.

Wait here until I get back.

Hello. Give me Headquarters, 21st Panzer Division.

Are you nuts?

Speak French?

- A little. - Good enough.

I don't understand. What are you doing?

You'll find out soon enough, gramps.

Now listen.

The TNT you're carrying...

...could blow up half the camp and all of you.

You're going to go back out there,

...go to the end of the walkway, stop,

...and say everything's ok.

I want to hear "Alles in Ordnung!"

I'll be aiming squarely for your chest or buttocks, my choice,

...and if I hear anything else...bang!

Verstehen? C'mere.

You obviously understood me. Go.

All is in order!

Shit, the sea shouldn't be here!

Wanna translate that?

Know what?

If I'd jumped on the tank when you conveniently forgot to stop,

...you wouldn't have the pleasure of seeing me now, my dear Karl.

What were you muttering to yourself?

I was saying, this can't be right...

...the sea should be behind us.

You want the sea behind you...

...you rotate the map.

Or you swing the tank around,

...which is what I intend to do.

But without you! Go on, get down.

- So what now? - Now, the war's over for you.

You're immobilised.

Now hand over your uniform,

...as a souvenir of our faithful friendship.

Stop! Are you crazy or what?

The next time I won't stop.

No, no, no. The cross too.

You're making a big mistake. No one can see this out alone.

But I'm not alone.

So who's your partner?

It's your buddy Alcide. Alcide Kalouand�.

Shithead.

That's nice, you get the sun, to frolic on a beautiful African beach,

...as I carry out my gruelling mission, yet I'm a shithead?

I've heard enough!

- You got the gold? - You got the cash?

- Yeah. - Where's that?

In a real vault, in a real city, with real money in real banks.

Perfect!

So, what's the procedure?

I see you lost Karl en route?

Pity. I liked him.

He was equally fond of you.

He said once we got to Betahoua,

...he'd intoduce me to Alcide Kalouand�. The biggest toad the world's ever known.

- He said Alcide Kalouand�? - He said Alcide Kalouand�.

- Are you disappointed? - No, I'm surprised.

Alcide Kalouand�, just doesn't jibe with an American accent.

You think your uniform jibes with a Belleville accent?

Honesty knows no homeland.

I'll be back tomorrow morning.

- Half in dollars, the rest... - No, all in dollars!

So, 68,000 US Dollars, a Thermos of tea and three croissants.

I'm a heavy sleeper, so knock very hard if you want to wake me.

Either that, or draw close and try the sound of a hundred dollar bill.

Okay, I'll be here.

Sergeant Augagneur, First Batallion, Foreign Legion!

- All hail Sergeant Augagneur! Hip, hip, hip! -Hurrah!

- Hip, hip, hip! - Hurrah! - Hip, hip, hip! - Hurrah!

- Hip, hip, hip! - Hurrah! - Hip, hip, hip! - Hurrah!

At ease!

Forward march!

Sergeant Augagneur.

General.

Mrs. Chanterelle, allow me to present the hero of the day,

Sergeant Augagneur.

Mr. Chanterelle, is the President of the North African Bank Group.

We're greatly indebted to you, Sergeant.

In fact, dear, we're indebted to him to the tune of six million.

- Or, almost. - My God...

I'm not into money, so to me that figure sounds staggering.

I do hope, General, that Sergeant Augagneur has been justly rewarded.

No, that will be up to the civilians.

Military personnel either honour or punish.

- What punishment do you have in store? - It will be announced tomorrow, before the troops.

"Sergeant Augagneur, First Batallion, Foreign Legion, is mentioned in dispatches

...for his feat of arms at El Ksour,

...during which he risked death to protect France's assets.

His courageous behaviour..."

- Yes? - Excuse me, General,

...how about "heroic" instead of "courageous"? Mum will be so thrilled.

As you wish.

"His heroic conduct reversed a situation in which...

...the fate of our soldiers was practically sealed."

Thank you, General.

Sergeant Pierre Augagneur,

You have a pleasantly French -sounding name... Are you from Paris?

Even better, Madame. I'm from Lavallois.

- You know Anatole France Street? - Yes, I've heard of it.

Good, you know the Roxy Palace? We had an apartment upstairs,

...where King Kong roared in our dining room!

And when Hitler renamed it Soldatenkino, my blood began to boil!

It was time to defend the honour of Lavallois.

- And you chose the Legion? - It was the repectable choice, Madame.

Allow me to look at an honest man, Sergeant.

They're rather rare around here.

The only banker I knew died prematurely.

He had a ravishing wife!

Did you mean, "That banker's wife was ravishing"?

No, I meant, "His wife was ravishing, too."

- And whatever became of this ravishing person? - Oh, it's horrible.

Her husband, whom she adored, died in tragic circumstances.

She has since become known as "The Desert Madwoman". She paces the desert, spouting nonsense.

- She mistook me for another. - What do you mean another?

She claimed some imaginary Legionnaire hijacked a German tank,

...to steal gold that belonged to a French bank!

It's obvious that she's lost her mind.

We should do something...

Should I tell the General?

Oh no, Madame. It's not the military she needs, it's a doctor.

Shooting her wouldn't help, she needs to be treated.

- Sergeant Pierre Augagneur. - Yes, Madame?

There's an aura of mystery about you.

Now, a marauder? A kind-hearted wildcat?

Or simply a romantic?

Tell me...who are you?

You might not want to know!

"I was the world's richest man, but gold was my downfall" Blaise Cendrars (Gold)