Original subtitles

Gao Zhun.

I was raped.

By a man.

Linlin is over there.

Go to her. Leave me.

I'm not going.

Come with me.

Please.

Trust me.

Ok?

Okay.

"Deep In" (Episode 6)

I texted Linlin.

I told her to go home.

You said it.

That's good.

I admire your courage.

But it's not enough.

What else do you want me to do?

I told you everything.

I showed you all of me.

I know.

You've done well.

But I need the whole story.

Every detail.

Every feeling.

Only then

can I help you.

I know you can do this.

I don't know who he was.

Or why.

I know.

I'll have someone handle it.

It won't affect the schedule.

It was late that day.

I was already asleep at home.

But something went wrong at the exhibition site.

I had to go over.

So I went to the underground parking.

It's okay.

Keep things on track per the plan.

That's it.

Who are you?

Fuck.

No.

Let me go.

I'll pay you.

Then I'd be your whore, wouldn't I?

No way.

Get off me.

Then he took a lot of photos.

Of my face.

I even hated myself.

For not being strong enough to fight back.

Did you call for help?

Answer me.

I didn't dare.

More than what he did to me,

I was scared someone would see him on top of me.

So you chose to endure it.

At that moment,

were you face to face?

Are you trying to help me,

or just curious how a man raped me?

I just need the trauma details.

The details are, he took me from the front.

He put one leg over his shoulder.

He kissed me while he fucked me.

His marks took half a month to fade.

Satisfied?

No. I'm not!

I also want to know

if you felt pleasure.

If you moaned.

If you came.

You...

How do you know?

I didn't want that.

That wasn't me.

That wasn't me.

I'm sorry.

I pushed too hard.

Let's go freshen you up.

Please.

Don't look down on me.

I didn't want it either.

I was the victim.

He entered my body.

It hurt.

I bled a lot.

But I don't know why.

I...

I could...

I could feel good.

I couldn't stop it.

I didn't want it.

How long did he assault you for?

I don't know.

I felt like.

I'd turned into an animal.

Did he use protection?

He came in me.

What about you?

I...

I came on myself.

He

used his hand.

Am I disgusting?

It wasn't your fault.

Many male assault victims feel pleasure

or get hard and climax.

First, it's biology.

Second, attackers do it on purpose

to assert sexual control.

Then they use the victim

feeling pleasure

to dodge punishment.

Really?

So...

maybe I'm not gay?

You questioned your sexuality?

What happened after that?

The next day, I had a fever.

I didn't dare go to the hospital.

I didn't dare tell anyone.

My family would just call me less of a man.

Linlin.

What woman would live with a man who was raped?

I was scared.

I couldn't watch TV.

I couldn't watch any sex-related news.

I kept holding a fruit knife,

stabbing him in my dreams.

How long has this been going on?

Before I met you,

I was always like this.

Cut.

Why run?

In a hurry to snap out of it?

The next scene has a different mood.

I need to adjust.

Mr. Zhang, you need a costume change next.

Got it.

Tell them to wait three minutes.

Sorry.

That's not what I meant.

I'll go now.

Okay.

Mr. Zhen, you may take a rest.

Have some water?

No need.

Take a break.

Let's go change the costume.

This way.

[DRESSING ROOM]

Why are you...

I need to change too.

We're two grown men.

What's wrong with squeezing in?

You can change over there.

Why squeeze me?

Isn't it nice that I'm changing with you?

Stop it.

People will gossip if they see.

Even if I do nothing,

they'll still gossip.

Don't turn around.

Do you remember?

When we first met,

it was like this too.

Who is it?

It's me.

Forgive me for being abrupt.

But

there's no time.

Don't turn around.

If you look at me,

I might lose the courage to say this.

I know you like stealing.

Because your world has nothing.

I gave you chances.

Money.

Jewels. Property.

And my heart.

I laid them all before you.

If you wanted to steal，.

I was willing to give.

But...

But why?

Why did you return them one by one?

Was it because of Xia Chengfeng?

I'm sorry.

I love him.

I know.

Soon, you'll put on your wedding dress.

You'll appear at the ceremony downstairs.

You'll become his bride.

Don't worry.

I'm not here to take you away.

I just wanted to tell you,

you can never repay it all.

At least my heart.

You can't give that back.

Xiao Mei.

You're a siren.

And a bastard.

I remember.

That day was the wrap day for North Peak.

The last scene.

The female lead hurt her back.

So I, the stunt double,

became her back double.

In North Peak,

Xiao Mei left me, her simp,

for her fiancé.

What about you?

What are you talking about?

North Peak is North Peak.

Deep In is Deep In.

But they're both us.

Zhun.

Zhun.

Bro.

I brought you water.

Open the door, bro.

Are you going to abandon me again?

Zhun.

Zhun.

Bro.

Bro.

Why is he here?

He came to change.

He...

No need to make a fuss.

Gao Zhun becomes dependent on Fang Chi.

He wants to see him every second.

And from this scene on,

Fang Chi must show love he doesn't recognize.

Love he doesn't recognize?

What?

Mr. Zhen sees the script differently?

My take is,

their relationship

has a powerful attraction.

Like magnets.

Once they meet,

they're pulled together.

They collide.

You mean

it's instinct.

But attraction

and desire aren't love.

Love is the inevitable end.

Attraction and desire

in this destined collision

are just things they can't escape.

I don't disagree.

Anyway, we're heading the same way.

Fang Chi is burning inside,

but holding back.

OK?

OK. Good.

Get ready.

Let's roll.

Have you noticed?

In the show,

you always want to see me.

But off set,

you're always avoiding me.

Acting is acting.

Life is life.

But we're actors.

You and I

can't escape the show.

I'll wait for you.

Dr. Fang.

It's closing time.

But a patient just came in.

His name is Gao.

Should I turn him away?

No.

He's my friend.

Let him in.

Come in.

Mr. Gao.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

I just wanted to see you.

You...

If you're not busy,

can we do therapy twice a week?

Of course.

If not,

it's fine.

Are you free at this time every day?

5:30 to 6:30.

I am.

Then from now on,

we'll do it daily.

Okay, Dr. Fang.

You know,

Linlin isn't here.

When I'm alone,

I'm scared.

How did you feel after going home?

I felt...

I wasn't alone anymore.

Being able to say it

felt like a relief.

I used to think,

if anyone found out,

I'd kill myself.

But now that you know,

I feel alive again.

You said you had nightmares.

Let's talk about them.

Dreams?

They're always about that.

Is it always him?

Or

is there someone else?

You just called my name.

Fang Chi.

Fang Chi.

Besides me.

No.

You seem nervous.

I...

I...

Don't lie to me.

Do you want the paddle?

I was wrong.

Only once.

Only once, it was.

Justin.

Why him?

There was an auction before.

He got drunk at dinner.

On the way back,

he tried to grab me.

I dodged him.

That night,

I had a nightmare.

In the dream, I fought back.

But he didn't let me go.

Did you feel pleasure in the dream?

Not with them.

In my dreams,

only with you.

I only feel it with you.

Because I want it.

What?

Want it or not...

Sorry.

I tainted you.

I'm shameless.

I'm sick.

But when I see your face,

I just...

Go on.

I want to hear it.

At first, I couldn't believe it.

Until I touched your face.

Even if it was a dream,

I just wanted to hold you

and cry on your shoulder.

Why cry?

Because

you finally came to save me.

I'm glad

you dared to ride in a car.

Because you were in the car.

Want me to walk you up?

No.

If you're nearby later,

come by for coffee anytime.

Wouldn't that trouble you?

Not at all.

I'd love you to come.

What?

Nothing.

Dr. Fang.

See you next time.

Hello. Do you have an appointment?

I'm Mr. Gao Zhun's friend.

He left something in my car.

One moment, please.

Mr. Gao isn't answering.

I understand.

I'll wait here.

Why don't you sit inside?

This way.

Mr. Gao and Mr. Jia are in a meeting.

Once they're done,

I'll let you know right away.

Please.

I want

to find a chance...

to stop him.

Is the Mr. Jia meeting with Mr. Gao

this man?

Yes.

Mr. Jia is with our company.

Where are they meeting?

The eighth-floor conference room.

Sir, what are you doing?

Where's the conference room?

Over there.

Dr. Fang.

What are you...

Come with me.

What's going on?

Continue the meeting.

Why didn't you answer my calls?

I was in a meeting.

My phone was on silent.

Are you free today?

Yes.

If it's for you, I'm free whenever.

Then come with me.

I just remembered.

You still need one test.

Okay.

Dr. Fang.

I'm happy

you came for me.

Don't be afraid.

I'm with you.

If I really have it,

leave me.

Let me die.

You'll be okay.

My God.

Two men holding hands.

Don't mind what they think.

I only care how you feel.

Just a second.

It won't hurt much.

Press and hold.

I...

I can do it myself.

It will bleed.

What if...

Your hand.

Give it to me.

Don't worry.

I'll stay with you no matter what.

I'll get the report.

Your boyfriend is so sweet.

He's not my boyfriend.

He's not.

He's my doctor.

Doctor?

The kind who gives shots at night?

What's wrong?

Scared?

You're a doctor?

Yes.

A therapist.

Oh.

Then mental issues...

can I come to you too?

I often can't sleep.

And I have nightmares.

I don't know what to do.

You can come in for therapy.

The first session is free.

Can I have your number?

Call me if you need therapy.

Okay.

But

when you need help,

you can call me.

Even at 3 a.m.

What's wrong?

Mr. Gao.

Gao Zhun.

Look at me.

Aw, having a fight?

Did those people say something?

Are you afraid they'll think we're together?

They all came alone.

Their so-called friends,

bed partners,

none of them came.

But you have me.

So they're jealous.

Don't overthink it.

Understand?

Then are we...

You're safe.

It's okay.

Thank you.

Fang...

Doctor Fang.

Are you afraid they'll think we're together?

If you need help,

you can call me too.

Call?

I can call.

Others can call too.

Anyone can call.

Anyone can call.

I'm not afraid they'll misunderstand us.

I'm just afraid.

Afraid

that once I get better,

we won't be connected anymore.

Mr. Gao.

Writing to patients is part of narrative therapy.

When I write to others,

I usually recap our sessions.

But this letter is for you.

I want it to be different.

Mr. Gao.

Want to know how I see you?

Remember the exhibition?

You waited for me in the dark.

It's me.

Remember those touch exercises?

You were terrified,

but you didn't run.

Don't be afraid.

It's okay.

Remember the Qixi fireworks and fountain?

You bravely shared your story with me.

What struck me deepest

was your courage at the edge.

And your beauty.

Maybe beauty is an odd word for a man.

But you are beautiful.

Beautiful flowers are the ones people break.

Beauty brought you pain.

But you should know

beauty is not your fault.

What hurts me most

is seeing you punish yourself for another man's sin.

What scares me most is hearing you talk about death.

Lastly,

thank you for trusting me.

No matter how far I pushed,

you always gave in to me.

More than once, I felt

knowing you

was one of the greatest gifts of my life.

Thank you.

Gao Zhun.

[Gao Zhun calling]

Mr. Gao.

It's late.

What is it?

The letter.

I got it.

I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have acted up.

Why did you?

I just...

I couldn't stand you giving that boy your card.

I couldn't stand you being as kind to him as you are to me.

I want you to be kind only to me.

I only want you to look at me.

I...

I get jealous.

Mr. Jia.

Please calm down.

As you can see,

I wasn't looking for you.

Yes.

It was a coincidence.

Don't worry.

I'm a doctor.

My ethics require me to protect client privacy.

Yes.

He doesn't know

you're my client.