Original subtitles

Oh, God damn it.

No, not now.

Hey, man, you gotta answer that.

That's your bitch, man.

Bro.

That's my bitch.

Hi, honey.

Hi.

Hi.

How's everything going?

Oh, everything's going pretty good.

All right, so let's do this.

So if X is the width or maybe it's the length.

No, X is the width.

But then what is that W?

Is that a W?

Did they change Ws?

This is so stupid.

I'm never gonna use pi in life.

That's not true, okay?

You are gonna have to use it.

What?

Well, no, you might never have to use it.

We just gotta jump through these hoops, okay?

So then you get a good grade.

Then you can get into a good college.

Then that sets you up to get a job at Raynard & Ferguson.

If you're lucky enough to get a job at a top 100 company like Raynard & Ferguson, damn right.

Drive the company car.

You still love that car.

What, now you're too cool for it?

You do still like that car.

Hey, put this down for a sec.

Come on, focus, okay?

Stop fidgeting.

Let's concentrate.

Actually, you know what?

Let's take a...

Do you have any history homework?

Should we do that?

Dad!

Dad!

Dad!

Glory Lounge just announced a new lineup.

Can I go?

Please, go where?

Please, can I go?

Rolling Loud.

Okay, you keep saying that.

I don't know what a Rolling Loud is.

What?

It's the biggest hip-hop festival in the world.

How do you not know about it?

All the best rappers are gonna be there.

What, like Eminem and Jay-Z?

Travis Scott, Sexy Red, Cardi.

Cardi B?

No, Playboy Cardi.

Dad, look at these names.

Who is this?

Dad BZ?

Stone Cold Jizzle?

No, come on.

You are not going somewhere to see someone called Ski Mask the Slump God.

Okay, that sounds like a serial killer.

Dad, I need to see Travis Scott.

Travis Scott.

Did you even see where this is taking place?

It's in a parking lot.

What do you have against parking lots?

93% of the crimes in this country are happening in parking lots.

What are you talking about?

It's dangerous, okay?

I can't let you do it.

Let's take some of this excitement, okay, and get back to the W situation.

Here we go.

Let's go.

Come on.

Did you know that the whole time?

I wouldn't let me do anything.

Come on, that's not true.

We went to Disneyland like a few years ago.

Megan Thee Stallion.

What type of hip-hop festival has a horse?

She's a rapper, Dad.

Not a good name.

No, I'm telling you.

He was so excited.

I haven't seen him like that since he was a little kid.

It was nice to see him happy for a second.

He's not going to some hip-hop festival in Hard Rock Stadium.

Actually, he's not in the Hard Rock Stadium.

He's in the parking lot.

What could go wrong in a parking lot?

Drugs, alcohol, hookers, people jumping off of roofs.

There are no roofs in parking lots.

I don't think there are hookers either.

Hookers are everywhere.

By that logic, he shouldn't go to the library anymore.

There aren't hookers in libraries.

Forget it.

Maybe if there were hookers in libraries, more people would read.

I would.

I can't hear you because I turned on my toothbrush.

My research strongly recommends you use A.I. One day.

My kid wanted to see Taylor Swift, and now I'm basically on welfare.

You can't put a price tag on memories you create with your kid.

And overall well-being.

Lucas, I love where you're coming from.

I love it.

But I've got to respectfully disagree, man.

Now, by show of hands, who here watches adult entertainment?

Okay, Terry, come on.

We're not going to be talking about porn.

We're not talking about porn, GD.

We're talking about adult entertainment.

Sorry, what's GD?

He's, uh, he's got a foul on me.

GD stands for G'day, mate, because he thinks I look like Crocodile D.

It doesn't stand for that.

I can promise you that.

You do kind of look like Crocodile D.

Hey, Terry, go ahead.

Continue with what you were saying about adult entertainment.

Everybody watches it, right?

Bryce doesn't watch it, obviously.

Looks like he's going to shoot up the office.

Hey, no way.

Nobody's shooting up any place, all right?

Bryce doesn't even own a gun.

I own several guns.

Okay, well, that's your right as an American.

Second Amendment.

Okay, nobody has to admit that they watch porn.

No one needs to blink if you watch it.

Hey, I knew it would be you.

Now, give me an adult entertainment category you would watch from home.

Not in the office, okay?

Not in the office.

Great category.

Great category.

Thank you, Hank.

This is locker room talk.

Locker room.

Thick Latina real estate agents.

Yes, Ramon.

Airbnb people.

Babysitter lost my kid but gave me another.

This is all good stuff.

Now, what do all these things have in common?

Dicks and pussies.

And they all take place in rooms with furniture.

Speaking of rooms filled with furniture, Aaron, I want you to kick off.

I'd actually like to hear this out.

Yeah, me too, Hank.

This is a family business.

Exactly.

40% of adult entertainment is within the family.

Is it really?

What about milk?

Massive.

Well, you're counting that.

It just depends on whether it's your mom or a friend's mom.

Huge mark, about 47%.

Oh, okay.

Well, I didn't know that.

I like the one where the stepson thinks he's gay and the stepmom shows him that she's not.

I like the one where the stepson has a condition where he can never get hard again and the stepmom cures it.

I like the one where stepson breaks both of his hands so mom helps him by washing his balls.

Well, he couldn't wash himself.

And then she starts glowing him for good measure.

Guys, what are we talking about here?

Market shares.

We spend $30,000 on a 30-second commercial during Everybody Loves Raymond reruns.

Our $30,000 commercial is going in one ear, right out the other.

I love Raymond as much as everybody else, but stepmom banging stepson to get him to go back to school is 23 minutes long.

Okay, what's your point?

If 25% of this country is addicted to consuming content that overall has a greater engagement value than the Super Bowl, and they're all fucking on a couch, why

are they not fucking on a Raynard and Ferguson?

Josh has to ship tutoring from Wednesday to Thursday, and I have tennis.

Can you take Zion?

Yeah.

And I have Sarah's birthday dinner Friday night, so if you could be home, I'd appreciate it.

Friday, making a note.

Friday night.

Copy that.

Girls night.

You have a lot of girls nights.

You know, you can have a guy's night.

Yeah, I know I can.

Did you ask Ferguson for that raise you were supposed to get?

Been four years.

Four years?

Can I show you guys something?

Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

What do we got?

I present to you why I should be allowed to go to Rolling Loud and what I will do to earn it.

You said it was dangerous, but 121 people were killed last year from falling coconuts.

So when you guys brought me to Hawaii, you actually put me in more danger.

Observe.

Daddy, why did you take me to Hawaii?

Mommy, help me.

Okay, we can skip to the next.

Moving on.

I will take out the trash anytime you guys ask me, and I won't leave my clothes lying around the house.

I will always clean my room if I can go to Rolling Loud.

Please, please, please, please, please, let me go.

I will do all the chores.

Okay, no, no, no, you don't have to beg.

That was great.

I think your mother and I both agree.

Which makes it hard for me to say that the answer is still no.

And I know that's not the news you wanted, so I got you a little consolation prize.

Just two tickets to Rolling Loud.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

We're going to Rolling Loud.

Rolling Loud.

Are you out of your mind?

I'm not out of my mind.

I just, I mean, have you ever seen him that happy?

That presentation was great.

I mean, I think we should be encouraging that kind of initiative.

He's not going.

You know what?

Okay.

You're giving up?

No, no, I'm not giving up, but at a certain point, yeah, I'm going to wave the white flag.

This is about the safety of our son.

And you know how he gets.

And you know how you get in a crowd.

What if you have one of your panic attacks?

I fainted because I had locked my knees and that cut off the blood flow.

That's not a panic attack.

Well, I wouldn't want you fainting on Zion either.

Honey, please, I just want to build a great memory with my son before it's too late.

Do you really want to risk his life just to be the cool dad?

I'm not trying to be the cool dad.

We're not storming the beach at Normandy.

Okay, I'll sell him the tickets.

Lord, I can't take it.

It doesn't have to be a painful death.

It shouldn't be because I still love her.

But maybe I'm one of those truck drivers he's been on for days.

He's exhausted.

He just reaches for his coffee and he just spills.

He just accidentally swerves.

And I couldn't imagine what is this prayer.

It's the St. Christopher Prayer, patron saint of travelers.

Get some sleep, buddy.

Okay, see ya.

Hello.

Hey, Hank, come on in.

Thank you.

What do you need?

Well, I just wanted to follow up on the email that I sent you.

What email?

I have a printout of it that I can give you right here.

That's great.

Basically, it was just, I wanted to follow...

Oh, how you doing?

Kicking ass and taking names.

Alright.

Should you and I maybe talk alone?

Anything you say to me, you can say in front of my son, Max.

He's going to be the boss anyway.

Okay, well, I'll look forward to that.

So, yeah, I've been at the company for a good many years.

And I was hoping that with the rising cost of living and inflation...

Did I send you to sit down?

No, sorry.

Take a seat.

What is it?

What I was hoping is that maybe I could get a pay rate that is more representative of...

Max, what does this sound like?

Sounds like he's asking for a raise, pops.

How are Hank's department's numbers?

And...

So, you're asking for a raise while your department slightly underperforms.

We slightly underperform for two quarters.

Two quarters is a half.

I agree.

And doesn't he get the perk of a company car?

Well, I don't know if that's a perk.

You don't like the company car.

I'm grateful.

No, no, I'm not.

I'm so sorry.

This meeting got off just in a crazy way because I'm very happy with my job, with the car.

This wasn't my idea.

It was my wife.

What a pussy.

Well, no, no, it's...

Hey, I can do his job for $29.99 a month.

I don't know anything about A&I, but this kid is a genius.

Come on.

Sit down.

I need you to fire Terry.

What?

Your son?

Your brother?

Half-brother.

He's in your department, isn't he?

Yeah, I mean, he is, but...

I've accumulated a list.

Wears jean shorts to dinner with clients.

Refuses to use the men's room.

Does not even know how to mute the computer on a Zoom call.

Well, that's tricky.

If he was not my son, he would have been gone a long time ago.

I get it, but wouldn't he know that this was just coming from you?

He's not bright enough.

He's a moron.

Well, that's...

I have to agree.

He's got a good heart, and he is, he's creative.

He thinks outside the box.

I can see him right now in the showroom, humping a section.

Ah, yeah.

I'm not digging in my heels here, but I don't think I should.

I really don't.

You don't want me to show you the AI works, Pop?

Yeah, I would love that.

You know what?

Let's shit can Terry.

Let's fire his ass.

It's too much, right?

There you go.

Thanks for coming in.

Thank you.

Hank.

Yes?

You're a real friend of my Pop's here.

Don't forget it.

How can he forget that?

Okay, thank you.

Bye.

Holy mackerel.

Terrible.

I keep forgetting he works here.

No, no, no, that's what I'm saying.

Imagine our couch was the casting couch.

This could be huge, dude.

Boss man in the building.

Hold on, hold on, guys.

Got to put you on mute.

What's up, man?

How you doing, Terry?

You want a stone crab?

No, I'm good.

Thank you.

You sure?

Yeah.

Listen, I've been thinking, and I just wanted to stop by and thank you for all the great ideas, okay?

Yeah.

And just how much Terry you bring to this office.

Oh, thank you.

Sometimes you get people who don't have the vision to recognize some of your creative initiatives.

Did somebody say something?

No, no, no one said anything.

I think people get jealous, okay, because you're an idea man.

And I've started thinking, let him go someplace where it's appreciated, where it's embraced, so he doesn't have to swim upstream against the water.

Why would I do that?

I love it here, dude.

I love it.

It's my pleasure.

It's my blood.

And you've been amazing.

But sometimes it's not the right fit.

And as difficult as it is for me to say, we're moving in a different direction, Terry.

Are you firing me?

No, I'm not.

I think that puts too far a blame on me.

My dad told you to fire me, didn't he?

No, he didn't.

Look, this is not from your dad.

My dad hates me, man.

Look, this decision came down from the board, because it's a publicly traded company.

It's a private company.

Public, private.

And it's like, who knows where we are these days.

It's like some riddle.

Hank, I'm begging you, man.

Please don't make me leave you.

I love it here.

I love right here.

Listen to me.

A month from now, you're not even going to remember me or this company.

Hank, look what I did.

Look at that.

Is that permanent?

Why is it so inflamed?

I don't know.

I think it's infected.

Nothing good ever happens to me, man.

Terry, Terry, look at me.

My dad's right.

I'm an idiot.

No, you're not.

What am I going to tell Max?

He thinks I'm the smartest person on the planet.

I mean, he's your half-brother, right?

I'm his half-brother, but God, I'm his whole world.

Hey, what's this?

Is this you and your dad together?

Yeah, it's us at Wind River Casino.

He told my mom we were going to go see my grandma.

We went to the casino instead.

It was the best day of my life.

Hank, please help me.

I'll do anything, man.

Okay, look, next week I'll talk to the board, okay?

Seriously?

You probably not.

Okay.

What's the matter?

I bet that it hurts fucking good, dude.

Is that the tattoo?

Yeah.

Maybe we can work something out.

No guarantees.

Okay, I can just talk to them.

All right, let me go.

Hello?

Mr. Ferguson?

Oh, yeah.

Hey, guys.

I thought you must have came on the internet at some point.

Hello?

Hey, guys.

I think I had a pretty good idea for the long weekend.

What do you say all of us head up to Uncle Jojo's cabin?

I have Sarah's birthday dinner on Friday night.

Oh, that's not this Friday.

You said that was the next Friday.

I told you, like, 15 times.

Oh, you're right.

Hank, you're such an idiot.

I'm sorry.

You're right.

I forgot.

I've had a crazy day, and I just...

Well, I mean, you two can still go.

Really?

You wouldn't feel left out with your two boys up there, having fun, making rock piles, maybe put a new door on the hen house?

Are you kidding?

Okay.

Ziggy?

What do you think?

I am too busy being depressed and miserable that I'm not going all out.

Daddy's right.

You need to get outside, have some fun.

Yeah, come on.

A boys' trip, the two of us.

Let's do it.

Will you pay me?

Now he wants to get paid to go have a great time riding dirt bikes, fishing.

Do fireworks?

Oh, yeah.

No fireworks.

Oh, no.

Fine.

20 bucks.

10.

15 if you smile.

Early in the morning, rising to your feet.

Light me up a cigarette.

After all the meetings, you two find some reason...

Zion.

Zion.

Hey.

What?

Can we talk a little bit?

Okay.

About what?

Anything.

I don't care.

How have you been?

Is this a trick?

No.

It's not.

It's just a conversation.

Any cool new friends?

Do you have a crush?

What's your favorite?

I don't know.

It's cool.

You can listen to your music.

I'm more into the late fifties.

Whatever.

No, no.

Hey, no.

Come on.

Let's listen together.

I don't like my music.

Why do you say that?

I don't even have any time on my turn.

Why do you say, hey?

Okay, well, maybe I haven't given it fresh ears.

Here, let's put it on.

You are Franker Tims.

Okay.

Fuck me good, I'm throwing that shit back He wanna kick me all over my tag I'm so fuckin' sexy, they attack

Niggas see this, they don't go Trust a nigga, that's a low-key my custom How you doing?

I told you you wouldn't like her life, they didn't like it, I think.

What?

I can tell you're stealing.

It's so unfair.

She always does it.

No, no, no.

Hold it.

You know that expression, life's a bitch and then you die?

Yeah.

Okay, well, sometimes your mom's a bitch.

What?

The thing is, yeah.

What I'm saying is, can your mom be a bitch?

Yeah.

Can I be a bitch?

Sure.

By the way, you've been a little bitch for way too long about this Rolling Loud thing, okay?

We need to drop it, okay?

Man, uh, now where the fuck are we?

Huh?

Why are we pulling into this parking lot?

Did I take a wrong turn?

I got distracted, didn't I?

Take out your Jeep.

What does that sign say?

Rolling Loud.

What?

Did the car just steer itself to Rolling Loud?

Is this what Rolling Loud is meant to be?

Thank you so much.

Oh my God, you're the greatest dad in the whole world.

Yeah, baby!

The bestest dad on the down low.

Or ever.

Low, low, low.

Mom doesn't know no one.

All right?

Okay?

Mom does not know.

Okay?

Okay, where are we?

Rolling Loud.

Where are we?

Fishing at the lake house.

That's right.

And I'll let these little bitches do some fishing!

Let's go!

Oh my God!

Do you lie to mom a lot?

What?

No!

We're married!

Look, this was a one-time little lie, okay?

Just because I could see what a big deal this was for you.

And technically, I don't really think of it as a lie because I've known your mom a lot longer than you have.

And I think part of her wants you to do this.

I really do.

But she has to say no because that's her goal, you know?

And then part of my role is I gotta be able to read between the lines and understand that sometimes when your mom says no, it's not a hard no.

It can be a maybe.

It can sometimes be a yes.

Does that make sense?

So when a girl says no, it doesn't always mean no.

Sometimes it means yes.

No!

No!

No!

No always means no.

But you just said that no could mean yes.

No, no, no.

Stop!

I was talking about the situation with your mom.

Forget it.

No always means no.

Even with your mom.

Fine.

Yes.

I lied to your mom.

Come on, let's have a great concert.

Here we go.

Whoa.

How old?

Well, I'm 51 and this wild man here is 13.

Need to be 16.

Hey!

Still a little eight weeks.

Since when?

Since always.

Been on the website this whole time.

Look, you know how it's like, you know, a kid can't drink till a certain age, but if he's with his parents, you may say it's okay for him to have a glass of wine.

Hey, could you slide out of my line so I can do my job, please?

Oh.

Clear, please.

Clear.

Wait, wait a second.

That kid's not 16?

It's the Rizzler.

He goes where he wants.

Fuck this.

Come here.

When were you born?

July 18th, 2012.

Why?

I was just thinking, weren't you born July 18th, 2009?

Which makes you 16, right?

Oh.

Another line?

When were you born?

July 18th, 2009.

Hey, come on.

Be confident.

Puff your chest out a little.

I'm 16.

You don't even need to do the fake voice, okay?

Just be yourself.

Dad, I'm 13.

I know I'm saying be yourself, but three years old, okay?

You got your driver's license.

You know, maybe you've kissed a girl or a boy.

It doesn't matter.

Mom and I are going to love you.

Okay, Dad, just stop.

I got it.

I was born July 18th, 2009.

I'm 16.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

You know who else goes wherever they want?

Zion fucking Goldstone.

You know why?

Because no means yes.

No, I don't know.

It's because I'm your dad.

I was going to say because I'm Hank Goldstone.

Hold on.

How old are you, kid?

I'm 16.

You got an ID?

Oh, man, Dad.

Sorry, I left it at home, though.

What?

Come on, this guy.

He never brings his wallet, so I got to pay for everything.

All right, old alligator arms.

Come on.

Let's go.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

What year were you born in?

2009.

Your father?

Yeah, his dad.

We did a home birth.

It was beautiful.

What grade is he in?

Grade?

Yeah.

Well, I feel like he should be in college.

He's so damn smart, but he's a sophomore.

Okay, good

to go.

Enjoy.

I think Dad made a terrible parenting decision.

Dad.

Dad, Dad.

Hey, Hank, help me.

Just do a nice dive.

I know it ticks you.

I know, but just stay close to me, okay?

And don't say tits, okay?

Be a gentleman.

Say, what should we say?

Just say boobs.

There's a lot of boobs here.

Yeah.

Those are great boobs, okay?

You know what?

Just forget it.

Let's just not say anything.

Just think it in our minds, okay?

Sometimes you can think it, but you don't say it, right?

In life, a lot of times, you can think stuff, but you don't say it.

Guess what I'm thinking?

I know what you're thinking, but don't say it.

Yeah.

Come on.

Let's go.

Dad, I need to go to the bathroom.

Okay.

Just meet me right back here.

Let me get us some grub.

We'll smash a couple of tacos and be ready to eat dinner.

Sound good, Ziggy-Zoo?

Dad, don't call me that.

Give me a break.

If there was ever a time to call you Ziggy-Zoo, it's after this.

Show me what we got playing.

Baby Drill, Little Da Boss Man, Gorilla Zo, Gorilla Zo, but all of a sudden, Ziggy-Zoo.

Dad's going to call.

Yes, you're right.

Oh, no.

I know I'm right.

Here.

Eat this.

All right, all right.

Meet me back here.

All right.

Thank you.

Don't forget, squat above, keep it neat, keep your tush off the seat.

Dad, it's okay.

GD?

GD!

Shut up!

Hey, Harry.

What are you doing here?

I'm here every year, man.

This place sucks.

Have fun.

Are you by yourself?

No, no.

I'm with my son.

He just went to the bathroom.

Hold on.

I'm with him.

It's good to see you.

Good to see you.

Oh, this is so cool.

How old's your son?

He is 13.

Shh.

You have to be 16 to be here.

No, I know.

That's why I went, shh, and kind of snuck in.

Why would you tell me that?

What do you mean?

It's illegal, Harry.

No, I know it's not.

No, I'm liable.

Security!

Exchange your name!

What do you think I'm kidding?

It's fucking awesome.

What a cool dad.

It was pretty awesome.

Your secret's safe with me.

Thank you.

You didn't have one of my secrets.

That's okay.

I need a little bit of anti-hunger.

You what?

You want some drugs?

She kicked.

I bet she wants some drugs.

You got to.

This is so cool you're here, man.

Hey, girthy dick gold star.

Hey.

After all that loud, you're gonna do drugs?

Out of my butt.

Harry, I love this.

Don't call me that.

You want me to just pretend I didn't see what I saw that day?

You didn't see anything.

I saw it, Hank.

Don't forget something like that.

Ah, man.

Makes you proud.

Proud of that thing and of me, man.

Harry, isn't there somebody waiting for you or something?

What's, what's, is it you're here alone?

How's she know I'm here alone?

You don't bring sand to the beach.

You of all people should know that.

Well, sometimes you bring friends, but I don't.

I'll get a couple chicken tacos and a soda.

No, no, no.

What do we eat for now then, please?

Don't do that.

I got this.

I'm gonna start off with the king crab legs.

Side of the quinoa pie.

This is a taco truck.

Let's go.

Okay.

Then we're gonna start it off with two Korean barbecue tacos.

Half north, half south.

Let's bring the borders together, shall we?

Then I want a plate of the carne asada nachos.

Deep fry the motherfuckers with a side of pollo asada on the side of the quinoa bowls.

Replace the sauce with barbecue.

And, uh, yeah.

That one's for Terry.

That's for Terry?

Who the fuck is Terry?

I thought you said you were here alone.

Hank, this is rolling loud.

If we go big or we go home.

We're going big, all right.

I didn't much for you.

No, it's not.

I'm gonna get this.

I insist.

It's only $205.69. It's fine.

I'm gonna get you for it.

Go ahead.

Thank you.

You saved my job, Hank.

Well, I haven't saved it yet, but, um, thank you.

And, oh, may I get a surf side and a coke?

Ooh, I like the sound of that.

Make that dose of coke.

It's kind of embarrassing.

I don't have any cash on me.

I think they take credit cards.

Look, I keep my credit card on the back of my phone so I never lose it.

That's good.

I left my phone at home so I could be present at the concert and enjoy my experience.

That's alright.

I got it.

Thank you.

It's actually good to leave your phone sometimes.

I should do that.

I've got to give you a little more hug.

No, you don't.

Oh, gosh.

You know what I love about you, Julie?

What's that?

You're not like a helicopter pilot.

No.

Definitely not.

I mean, your son's, what, 13?

And you're letting him cruise around here by himself.

That's awesome.

No, no, no.

He's not cruising around.

He just went to the bathroom.

That's right.

Good.

Okay.

He has been gone for a while, though.

Yeah.

It has been.

Hank, he's fine.

This is rolling loud.

Well, I know this festival.

Yeah, I do.

He's probably three knuckles deep in ice spice right now.

I don't know what that is, but since we've been saying you're throwing things, I kind of do.

Hey, Terry.

Okay, he's 13.

It's appropriate.

Yeah, it just is.

I don't know how to talk to you outside the office.

Okay, well, just talk to me in the marble.

It's hard when you're a little intimidating.

Intimidating?

I always thought maybe you had Tourette's or something.

I'm actually a little bit on the spectrum.

Oh.

Yeah?

Maybe just at the beginning of it.

No, I'm down the line.

They gave me a parking pass.

Did they?

No.

See, if you don't want to hang out with me, I'll annoy your son.

No, no, no.

It's not that.

It's just I'm just, now I'm starting to get a little anxious.

Where is he?

He should be getting back here.

Let me just call him.

See, look.

Cell service here is shit.

They're like some pockets where you might find reserved equipment.

I'd better just go look for him.

Listen, I'm sorry to eat and run, but are you going to be all right?

I'm fine.

Okay.

Hang on.

He'll be fine.

I know.

He's going to turn up, I promise.

Okay, thank you.

Thank you.

And what a great surprise.

Have a terrific rolling layout.

Nice seeing you.

Hey.

I'll let you look for him.

No.

It's the least I could do.

Terry, thank you.

This ain't my job.

You bought me food.

No, no.

I don't want to slow you down.

Please.

Your dad can't wait to meet little G.D. Don't call my 13-year-old G.D. Just call him Zion.

Zion.

I like Zion.

I bet if Zion said anything like his old man, it's...

It's a really good boy.

Yes.

Thank you.

Big old birthday heart.

Let me just drop birthday from the vernacular.

It's your day.

Zion.

Zion.

Oh, my God.

Is it Zion?

No.

No, no, no.

It's not him.

It's not him.

It might not even be a him.

Zion.

Zion.

D.B.M. No.

Daddy.

Did this pervert just call himself daddy?

No, no.

I'm looking for my son.

You wish that pervert was your daddy.

Hello?

Terry.

Zion.

Okay, look.

Eventually, his phone's going to work or mine's going to work.

We're getting in touch.

Until then, I'm not going to panic.

I'm just going to assume he's enjoying the concert.

Unless he's been taken.

Taken?

People don't get taken at concerts, Terry.

No, she didn't.

That movie, Taken.

No, she didn't.

She got taken at the airport.

No, in the sequel.

She got taken at a concert.

She got taken twice.

She got taken three times.

Shit.

What?

What's Zion?

Zion.

Oh, it's my wife.

Oh, we're good.

No, it's not good.

I thought you said that the phones don't work here.

It's like I keep getting messages.

You want me to answer it?

I'm right under pressure.

No, Terry, of course I don't want you to answer it.

Well, maybe she heard from him.

She might know where he's at.

Want to suss it out?

All right.

Let me, let me call her.

No, no.

Just give me a little privacy.

Yeah, boss man.

Okay.

Private conversation.

Hello.

Did you make it okay?

Hey, yes, yes.

We made it.

Where I, it's just so great just being here and in nature and just the beauty of just being able to unplug and just get out the rat race.

I texted you.

I know.

I got it.

Yeah, I, I.

So, message is back.

I don't know.

The cell service maybe is a little patchy.

I, hey, hey, hey, hang up the phone.

You're live on curiosity.

Man everybody can hear you.

Okay.

It's not doing okay.

Sure.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, he's actually snowy swimming Mommy's on the phone.

He's waving.

Hi No, no, he's not swimming alone.

I was out there with we're playing Marco Polo tonight.

Really?

No life any self-respect at all.

No Really Like furniture and Enjoy yourself Liar

Liar, I'm scared.

You must have this massive.

Thank your hand girthy dick Johnstone yet You have no fucking balls scared boss Why carry your mom to bring out that belt just

whale on your little behind grow a pair of balls Got this I

Had your wife on jay-z, you know what I don't want to talk about that.

All right, my son is lost 13 there's people walking around wearing ski masks wearing paint for clothes.

There's no cell service Unless of course, it's my wife and then I get projected on a giant screen to get embarrassed.

So I get it Okay, she probably makes all the decisions yes, you can't sleep you won't take a hand and she probably did some weird show You've been pushing her sadness deep down inside for

years.

You probably secretly pray she gets hit by a car or something Not a car.

She didn't even want you to bring him here.

He did He's your son too.

Yes, but you didn't want to duke it out with her See you chose the path of least resistance you lied now.

He's gone Harry It's really good to see you and I need to focus on finding Zion right now.

So by myself Can you please just give me some space?

Let me go do this, okay, I'll see you at work.

Thank you I'll be fine tonight I'll keep an eye on Thanks

Thanks

I I've

got sort of an emergency.

I was at the food court.

I lost my son He went to the bathroom when I went over there He Zion Isaac Goldstone, he's 13

kind of curly blondish 16 to be admitted into this.

I understand that but that ship is sail.

So let's now can we just focus sir?

where You told me your son was 16 You lied to security He is 16.

You just said he was 13.

I understand that.

So let's think of him as 13 even though he's 16 because there's more of a sense of urgency if there's a little boy loss, right?

The hell is this guy doing here?

He was with a 13 year old at gate B Let me be fully transparent I'm sorry.

I used a little finesse.

He's normally provided false information You're making it sound pretty meditation of section 273 of the penal code of which cozy you're teaching your son to be alive That's what you're doing.

No, I'm not Oh

What's that strange Canada It's a production proper special effect they used to create Come here like a cowboy just

blasted away and you shot me in the ass.

What will you listen to?

Saw you in trouble with the help.

We're gonna arrest.

They weren't we're gonna get it straight now And then they're gonna help me find my son Fucking festival juice.

No, no, no, you're you're a I'm a dad searching for a son.

That's my story.

You threw a punch No, we didn't No mom's get like that superhero strength like it was a part

of the baby suit today You use your mom's trying to fucking flip that Huge You assaulted him,

you know man handle bother searching for his son.

So yeah Oh They

never take me but I'm done running just take me no one's taking you I'm a volunteer Sorry, you just scared me.

You look like you could use a cold drink.

Can I get you something?

I Love some water only got alcohol.

Okay, I'll take a boons for my brown bag got two beers Melinda Terry That's my boss and my best friend Hank,

I'm a little war talkers, right?

I've lost my son's eye.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

He's not dead.

Oh, so he's not even supposed to be here no, I Know I made a mistake, but look I I was at the food court

He was supposed to go the port-a-potty and are you happy?

She's gonna come back and pouring gasoline on a missing child I'm not I'm just trying to tell her what happened.

We were supposed to meet back.

Take a second.

Listen, just sit down I okay, I'm gonna close your eyes and breathe in through your nose now through your mouth.

You are freaking out Yeah, you know people are never really lost they're just struggling to be found so fucking

stupid That's what I've been saying Nobody's ever lost a price.

I said that early You need some electrolytes.

He's fine.

He'll dehydrate it to these.

This is so much better Teddy it's Terry.

Listen, this happens all the time every year kids get separated and we always find them Yeah, we have systems always find them.

Yes You just have to go to security Yeah, have you gone to security, uh, yeah, I went to that security until Someone decided to

come in with a stage can and just light up every security guard in sight They were gonna arrest him for child endangerment.

I busted it.

I broke him out.

I flipped a guy whose mom strength That was kind of cool.

Oh Shit, that was you guys.

Yeah, that was us.

They're pissed and they're looking for you You make everything negative I think you're right He's probably just out there having a great

time.

He's lost Think about what your first concert was.

Okay, okay here What was your first concert my first concert was Lilith fair saw Sarah McLachlan had a crush on a girl

This is his Lilith fair.

He was probably dreaming to come here, right?

Yeah, he didn't really want to come yeah, it's rolling loud Basketcase, I'm sorry, Terry.

I'm sorry.

I was freaking People all the time, but you know what?

They usually end up finding what?

Let's pay real Who is this?

That's sexy, right?

I'm pulling this shit back.

I'm your favorite hole This is On the way to concert she's on stage one, he's down.

She's probably in that crowd The main stage is huge.

Let's get to the front and see if she'll make an announcement You know, sometimes artists will stop the show and put someone's picture out take this the dumbest idea I've ever heard my entire life.

We should split up to cover more ground.

Hey, come on go this way you know No, hey, Terry, we can't go anywhere near that stage if security sees us for busted to for wanted men Security doesn't know me

Come with me if you want to find your son Hey, we're going this way It's a dead end I'm

sorry If I'm a jury else, but it's okay to get a little help every now and then I know but we're injured and mustard We are starts being hot striking

donkey Get that far what?

Donkey They were best friends.

They can blame each other Shrek.

It's all sad alone She's just a steam Say freeze You

got it, okay I

Saw Hallucinating well, that is where the side effects of a

lucky death.

What?

No, no, I heard what you said, I'm not tracking what you said about side effects of a drug Do you not your truck?

No, no, I don't do drugs Watch your back Linda I thought you gave me aspirin What was that

200 milligrams of potassium for the dehydration and then 200 milligrams of valerian root to calm the nerves and unlucky Dips that the lucky that doesn't sound medical.

I got it from a guy in a ski map in the parking lot Oh

Okay, I can feel it That's it you're off the team Linda, it's okay Ferris wheel if you get to the top of the Ferris wheel your phone

will work You're closer to an unobstructed line and that's where the signal clears up.

I promise Oh

Sorry, we're just doing a little bit of a situation here feeling the thoughts of

crowd We're like 30 feet.

I think you're high 10 tops.

Maybe a baby's doesn't hide abusive drugs.

Oh No, just say no She's not with us I am Terry this is my best friend.

Hey, some people call him GD GD.

No, no, that's earthy dick You lost a son today.

Oh my god.

I Am so sorry brain tumor No, no, no, we got separated this morning and I've been trying to find them and the phone doesn't

work and we're not getting service So I'm sure that you'll find him for the acid smack first.

Yeah But wait before what but he's only 13 Yeah Lied and I snuck a man stupidly I

wish I knew my dad.

That's so awesome.

The girls of daddy issues have such raging party habits of bored sexual thinking attitudes You never meet your dad Get

it's not working Linda just need to get higher maybe you need to keep your mind on it for a couple minutes No, no, okay I

don't well, I have one snap friend, but it's my son and it's just a key to tabs on What happened why'd we

stop what why are we stopping?

Hey, let's go.

I think they're holding it for a guy in a wheelchair Being a little insensitive.

Well, he deserves to ride the ride just like anybody else.

Yeah I see a problem.

No, you don't have to know I wasn't yelling at the wheelchair guy No, I It's

another guy in a wheelchair, whoa, there's a lot of them the US Wheelchair Association Long.

Yeah, I think that they're sponsored by a moaning battle all part of rolling on commitment to making the world a better place They call it rolling.

Yeah, that's good

Oh

You don't have to be legit insane to be in that mosh pit right now It's given us fans are like high key mentally ill.

That's exactly where you posted from though.

I Hope your son knows Rage Hey

What the fuck is that I'm with you buddy Yeah

Do we have insurance Look at me Linda Use

your mom strength I

Couldn't save her I tried I just she just Hadn't she just slipped.

I told her I wish she was dead like ten times today.

You didn't mean it Terry Yeah, I did It's not your fault, I'm the one who dropped her.

Oh, yeah Yeah, yeah you killed her What that's so much worse than is wishing somebody would die.

I feel a lot better.

Thank you No, no, it's okay.

It's okay.

No, it's horrible I

Can't drop me So

my last almost good, you know, I'm gonna sing a dance to MIT I Need another beer

Oh

Oh

I Didn't see her I just heard that she was falling Stay with me I'm

doing a chest compression.

Okay, this is CPR.

It's like you're grabbing bones.

Oh, what's going on down there?

What are you fucking with our dick?

Now he's making out with her.

I'm doing CPR CPR Going mouth-to-mouth Mouth-to-mouth, that's literally what CPR is.

Why is he rock hard?

Trust me?

That's soft.

Did you even see from there?

You deserve it security Oh

All right They

chasing us No Hey, you're on fire No, I'm not he's

on No,

stop It's

coffee you do So

Crazy do you not feel anything?

I don't feel anything.

I feel like somebody threw coffee on because they just did If this Oh No I'm

so sorry Hank.

I really thought you were on fire I feel like he's upset about something else Don't

let us hope okay too late now, we're gonna find Zion man No, it's my

wife They're gonna voicemail not the time No I'm gonna

answer it.

No, you can't host it.

I need to face the music.

Okay, I can't just keep lying Lying ends now Hello,

hi, hi, listen, I'm glad you called So I'm sitting here with Jessica Cindy vendors mom and she just showed me this snapchat post

of Cindy at a concert Hanging with Travis Scott Artists only rolling loud question mark and I don't understand why Zion's tagged in a post

because of the algorithms Oh Algorithms Yeah, I think it's those algorithms are ruthless I searched for

vacuums the other day and how my feet is all just hot singles who like to clean carpets I liked one video of a guy juggling and now YouTube thinks I'm looking for Sexy

clouds juggling their balls.

Yeah from the whole social media with AI Thinking that they know everything about us, but then it makes you wonder Okay, if they're getting this wrong, what else are these robots getting

wrong, but don't let me bore you here.

Have a great time Oh, but ladies, I do have to let you know.

I do get my carpet cleaned every Thursday at lunchtime.

You're so bad Have a number Gosh good boy.

Here we go.

Listen.

Hi What happened to the lying ends now?

I said the lies in soon Linda Don't make me feel worse.

I already feel okay.

You don't just go cold turkey on no lying Okay, I want to give her some good news Okay, and I finally have some someone posted a tag of Travis Scott

inside Oh in the artists only section Well, but death what Britain tip from earlier they had the artists only landers.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh god Hope you didn't have to do what they did to kill him.

No, no, I've got

They snapchatted me, we're friends!

Yes, I've got it right here!

Tiff likes Delphs and Britt the Superfuck.

Give me the damn phone.

Go, go ahead.

Uh, greetings, it is Hank from earlier by the Ferris wheel.

Please meet us by Artist Only entry, we think we found Zion.

Respectfully, Hank Goldstone.

What'd they say?

We'll have to wait, NASA said.

Do you think they're gonna respond?

They've got a pretty high score.

They're gonna help us, they're gonna help us.

Artist Only is all the way that way.

There's no way they're gonna let you in, security is everywhere.

And you look like you just shot two girls one cup.

The only way they're gonna let you in is with me and this merch key I stole.

Let's go.

Put your hands together for Lady Un-Fucking-Forty!

anybody's hat feel like it's kinda strangled?

Uh-huh.

What's going on with our boy?

It's the drug time.

Hey.

Melanie?

Is she talking to him?

I don't know.

Hey.

Did you see Zion?

I'm never gonna let you see him again.

I'm gonna take him I'm gonna take him I'll keep him safe he's not going I just Great memory with my son before it's too late.

Oh you okay I

Can't believe they stood us up dude.

Well, then where are they check your phone?

It's not they can see us We can't If

you can Let's be a pepper spray I don't care what happens to me.

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna create a distraction and you're gonna go in there It's your son.

You're fine today Trust

me Terry I think he's just going after Paul No,

he's an idea man, he's got this you want to see an idea man, I'll show you an idea Do

you boys want to assault or the pepper Oh No

For me sir, I can't see the skin.

You're supposed to be in here No You even sure he's old enough to be here.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, he's good 17 my mother fuck You

guys seen him Zion and my son here you are bro, I'm good.

Oh no, no, yeah, let me see No, he's great.

She's so it's cool.

It's all good Yeah, I see your son bro, but shit, hopefully fun.

Thank you.

I'm sure you don't need to die.

No, bro.

I'm good I gotta keep searching for but I'm okay.

I'm good.

Wait Wait, excuse me The sexy is big sexy.

I'm sorry big sexy What's up, you you wouldn't happen to know where I could find Travis Scott.

You see earlier today I think my son said that he was gonna be with Travis Oh, you would have gotten out of security looking for on the big screen.

You saw that everybody saying a sheet You jumped off a Ferris wheel, right?

No, I threw someone off a Ferris.

Okay, that's right

I

Don't know I'm not fighting fight.

I'm just Looking

for my son.

Okay Did

you hear what she said Oh my god, I think it's black What

Such a bush sick, isn't it?

You grew that yeah only took me 10 years.

Oh, that's impressive.

Thank you When did you get naked?

Did you miss everything?

You don't cool.

Yeah It's over remember what sexy red said remember my sexy man say What is Riverside

me fuck around and find out I?

Did fuck around I didn't find out.

That's why I'm asking you wanna fuck around again.

No Yeah, I got looks so nervous today y'all lucky day he's saying I'm talking to you You cool

need a place, okay, you got this looking stay nice.

Thanks.

Come on, please All

right, mr.

Scott How you doing Hank Goldstone?

Listen, I have a big fan.

I don't want to take up too much your time I've had a little bit of an emergency work Hey

Travis, hey Travis, listen, I my kid I Got

ya, so she a big fan and on a ship every song my favorite That's putting me on the spot.

That's hard to say.

I mean all your tunes are popping.

I guess I'd say fiend The live version.

I love that.

I was here right here right now Oh Yeah, now you're gonna give me a beat or I'm just gonna do

this bitch acapella, okay Just come outside to the night Take

your time get your eyes You'll be creeping You may freak out.

Hey, I'll fuck this man I I'm not really a fan.

I I Don't love your music.

I don't know it but my son loves you and I love him more than anything That's why I brought him to Rolling Loud I was trying to let you know learn the lyrics

to fiend cuz I was gonna surprise him tonight during your set only I lost him I

Just gonna show yeah, he's a good-looking kid.

He takes after his mother.

I Got so many photos of chairs in there there's aya That's him when he graduated kindergarten And here's him with a

mustache.

Obviously, it's fake.

That's me.

He's like 90 years old but here he is last week just Looking into the camera.

You can see he's like a good kid Now I ain't seen those.

I don't know.

Could you maybe?

Now it's one wife and then you gotta answer that that's your bitch man, bro And it is

my bitch Hi, honey, hey, hi How's everything going?

Oh, it's going pretty good.

Just been watching a movie and actually Zion's a little knackered He's fell asleep what I'm Dosed off to the

movie so loud.

I I woke up but enough about me.

How are you doing?

How's how's how's girls night?

It's actually a little bit of a drag These ladies they just talking about their problems the whole time and I don't know.

I just can't follow honestly What I'm sorry, I was just saying that Yeah, we miss

you.

I wish you were here And you're hot-ass.

Oh, I miss you, too Okay, um Listen, I'm gonna get out of here.

I think and I am really looking forward to having my voice back You too Good night Good

night What should I tell you that I didn't say it I said it right at the end That's

a lot of bush But I can pick the lock from here it's wrong say you thinker There

it is See Hank man, the way you go to lives to go find your kid man.

That's some real deep shit it's like some superhero super father shit like Some 3.1 4 1 5 9 2 6 5 3 9 7 9

3 2 3 type shit some like deep shit Well, I appreciate you saying that Travis Scott.

All right, my wife's gonna divorce me Child Services, you know, they're gonna take Zion.

I can't blame them for losing.

I'm probably gonna be jobless.

Yeah Do you think I'm gonna keep my job selling furniture?

You're crazy.

Oh, no, are you working?

Reinhardt Ferguson, man, what the fuck what nah fuck with that spot what?

You're just saying I'm a firm a firm fan what the fuck you think this bird should come from I'm so caught up in

losing Zion.

I didn't notice we got the Ironwood Junction table Then you got the bumbleweed chairs.

Yeah, you guys got it all.

Oh And you got this one the Ralston lounger I don't want to toot my own horn, but I kind of go create that thing.

That's some real rockstar shit Did I just put mail on you're the rock star, but it is pretty comfortable You're trying to put rest for us foot

that takes it to the next level Yeah, there's a button on the right side Glenn put that in I told you gotta make it more obvious It's

gonna be too relaxed to go on stage was all I caught up like this and now he's just like a little kid I think this nigga wanna fuck

you.

Make sure y'all find that kid, too.

Thank you Let's go find About this

goddamn button on the side Guys it worked.

It worked.

We're gonna get time It's okay these guys with you yeah, you're goddamn right they are they're my idea men take the cuffs off

Oh

Oh It's

my favorite song, you know, it sounds weird I just kind of wanted to watch it with I Just

hope he's not too worried about me.

That's all sorry No,

he's she's probably Okay I

Love

you I

Need my good friend Terry and Linda Your dad's an American hero, yeah

Tried to kill a little person what we saved for you.

He threw me off a Ferris wheel, but I'm all good Who's this?

This is my friend.

What my boy?

You were awesome up there.

I mean like inside has the coolest dad Thank you, did you hear that?

Yeah, you know that's got the coolest best friend.

So friends.

Oh This is mom You gotta go.

I'm sorry.

Yeah Do you remember when I told you I love furniture I do but Furniture I love my dad.

I just wanted him to notice this.

I gotta go.

No, I know but I don't have to work that job anymore Can you do anything you can one of those things I Want to be half the dad that you are someday and you guys have

don't lose that Now thank you for everything you've done for me seriously, what's the best for you You

gotta go

Use

my Oh Hurry You got this show some confidence

remember 16 now, right you got your driver's license you kissed a girl I'm right here.

I'm riding shotgun just like always.

Okay.

Okay I

Get some supplies We'll get some granola some bananas mill Oreos Oreos,

okay.

I'm almost there.

Can't wait to see you She's almost there I

Should just disappear if the brass go out of my car and I go up a cliff make sure the authorities question your mother Oh

How is your evening it was the best night of my life pretty great Did