Original subtitles

Erolicism n also be a splendid litmus paper

which reveals moods, thoughts, emotions and feelings.

It is an expressive and ideologil picklock,

a magnifier to discover the most deeply hidden drives of the human soul.

Lilue in this short movie

where the asexual behaviour of the characters

shows us some tasty tmths about the characters themselves.

For mple, the narcissism of how one wants to appear

oflen hides a person's tme nature.

In this , a chavinislic arsehole

becomes fmslniied and impotent and his wife cheats on him.

TINTO BRASS presents

A Magic Mirror

STOP SLOWING DOWN

Back!

Is that OK?

Giulia!

Did you go to the locksmith for the new lock?

Iwent but ilwasclosed.

And the phone nneclion?

I talked to Telm, thefre ming tomorrow.

Also, the guys for the washing machine. I told them to me at 11am.

Shit! I told you to males it 12pm.

They uldn't do it at 12pm.

They n't me here when you want them to.

- It was at 11am or in two days and I said... - Yeah, yeah. It's all light.

And what did the rpenter say?

It was closed as well. There was a mad traffic jam this evening.

I'd told you to slop by the shop.

You don't have to necessalily go to the one downstairs.

- You uld go yourself. - Try to remember tomorrow.

Do I have to do everything?

Who went shopping and to buy the plants?

Fuck ill

What happened?

Nothing, nothing.

Be reful with those plates. Thefre from my mother.

Yes!

Why don't you gel out of that bath and me and help me?

You've been in there for half an hour.

Sin we've got this house I've been doing everything.

Are you getting the door?

- Of urse. Who else would gel it? - Of ursel

- Hi, Walter. - Hi.

- Do you want a hand? - No worlies. I'll do it.

- Who is it? - It's Walter with the new mirror.

- I bet he's having a bath. - Good guess!

- What does he need another mirror for? - Oh, Walter!

Come here!

Sit down.

You're always bathing and making yourself 'prellf. It's an obsession.

I don't deny it. Everyone has an obsession.

I heard you lost yesterday as well.

- Who told you? - I heard it.

People never mind their own business.

Anyway, you deserve it. What did I tell you? Don't listen to that arsehole.

- Let's not talk about it. - You're just a bark.

- I told you... - Stop it. I don't want to talk about it.

Anyway, thank you for the mirror. Giulia n't put it up, though.

What does it have to do with Giulia? It's your job.

Ifyou did it, it'd beas if I was doing it myself anyway.

I don't understand.

You're doing me a favour.

- It's obvious! - Don't talk bullshit or I'll break that mirror.

Where do you want me to put it?

Next to the door.

All right.

How do you manage to live with him?

I've only been here for five minutes and he's made me mad already.

I know what you mean.

- Sometimes he seems a bit dumb. - He's net et all. He's a son of a bitch.

- Don't offend your mother. - Let's not even talk about it.

- Don't make jokes about things like that. - Who's joking?

She's making me go mad.

'Sandro is so good! Sandro said that. Sandro did that.'

What about me? Without me she'd be on the streets. He'd never take her with him.

It's just that you're too good.

You mean a bark.

You two are so different.

It's hard to believe you're brothers.

You're telling me.

Close to the door, OK?

Close to the door.

Not m high!

Not m high.

- Not too low either. - Not too low either.

Iwanttobeabletoseenlywhole body.

Remember you're at least four inches shorter than me.

Arsehole. He's a total arsehole.

- He's like that. - He always does what he likes.

My mother doles on him because he's an actor.

And what an actor he is. In four years he only did one photo soap opera.

- It's a hard profession. - We all know what his profession is.

- He has an audition on Monday. If... - Again.

Every week there's one.

Hello!

Yes, bull...

I don't give a toss. You should've thought about that beforehand.

You didn't gel it, then. You didn't gel it. You have to bring me the money.

There's fucking nothing to explain.

Listen to me. Either you bring the money tomorrow or you're in trouble.

Hang UP-

Bloody hell.

They all want to have a life of crime.

And then they shit themselves.

Excuse me.

Could you give me a hand?

Of urse.

- Giulia, I'm sorry. - Fuck offl

Bloody hell, such a slap!

Instead of staying here doing nothing, go help my brother. Go.

Iwanttobewithyou.

Come on, fucking hell! He's doing us a favour.

So? Are you deaf?

Move your arse!

As you like.

The splfllfle-

So, do you still want a hand?

Look at your fa.

Are you insane?

I don't know if it's that stuff you snort or going to the gym that makes you like this.

What are you doing?

I was joking.

- Come on. - Leave me alone.

I was joking. SIOP “-

Go and gel me the hairdryer.

Where is it?

Where do you think it is? In the kitchen?

If it's not in the bathroom, it must be in the gym bag.

These fucking Sicilians.

That girl doesn't understand that if she wants to stay, she has to work.

She has to work.

Il won't be long before I send her back to her village.

One second.

Do you know what she asked me the other day?

She mes to me and says,

'Can I go out with my fliend?'

She said it was someonds birthday.

I slapped her hard.

All light. I'm going to dry my hair.

If I don't fix it straight away, I will never manage.

The other day, I had like a horn.

I had to wash it again.

- Who have you had an affair with? - Nobody.

- I never... - Never?

Never.

Never say never.

Well. What is it?

I just wanted to check ifyou needed anything.

That's a first.

Walter. Sandro is here.

- I n1, Walter. - why?

Wail for him to leave.

And then we n do everything you want.

- Everything? . Everylhing, yes-

You picked the wrong brother.

Yes.

So, do you want me?

I've been wanting you for years.

You uld have told me before.

You uld have told me.

- I'll finish here then I'll give you a hand. - Really?

I don't need it. I've neafly finished.

What's wrong? Are you all light?

What's that fa for?

I feel a bil Stressed. Nlaybe I'm a bil tired.

Well, go to bed eafly and tomorrow you'll feel fine.

- You're so beautiful. - Am l?

Is this how you wanted it?

Perfect. Thank you, little Walterl

It's OK. It took me less than 20 minutes.

Bloody hell! You're a. It'd take me 20 minutes to males that dlill work.

You should learn.

You reckon? I want to leave these little salisfaclions to you.

Do what you like.

You look so prellyl N6 Y0" 90mg W"

With fliends?

- With a gorgeous chick! - First time to shag her?

- Already shagged her. - Same tacli.

Of urse. 'Would you give me a hand?'

You'll slay overnight?

- But you will be late? - I don't know. Are you a detective?

Don't gel pissed off.

- I lefl a bit of mess. Will you clean it up? - Giulia will do it.

Can you show Walter out?

Yes.

For you.

- You're giving me half a million lire? - You've been doing a lot for me.

By the way, n you tell Mum I'll me and see her on Sunday?

She'll be happy. Can you slay with her on Tuesday?

Tuesday? No, I n't.

- Fuck it. For on I ask you a... - I n1, I've got something to do.

Something important. I'll tell you later.

- Bye, Sandro. - See you, Walter.

Are you ming back? I'll wail for you.

You bell

- The green tie? - With the others.

As soon as you see the r leaving.

While you're wailing.

You're mad.