Original subtitles

YES, MR. JONES.

YES SIR, YOUR PROJECT IS READY.

THANK YOU SIR. BYE.

DANNY!

DANNY.

ARE YOU STILL NOT TALKING TO US?

DANNY, WE HAVE TWERK TO DO.

WE HAVE TO COMMUNICATE.

ARE YOU LISTENING TO US?

OH, WHATEVER.

I THINK HE WAS ON THE PHONE WITH MR. JONES.

MRS. JONES!

NO YOU IDIOT ‐‐ MR. JONES, OUR CLIENT.

THE ONE WE'RE DOING THE PROGRAM FOR.

OH.

DANNY, WERE YOU JUST TALKING TO MR. JONES?

ANSWER HIM.

I'M ‐‐ I'M SORRY.

DO I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE THE PROGRAM?

WAIT, DID YOU DO THIS WITHOUT US?

DANNY.

YOU KNOW THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A GROUP EFFORT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S NOT SPEAKING TO ME.

[ EXASPERATED SIGH ]

I CAN'T, EITHER, BECAUSE WE'VE APOLOGIZED WAY TOO MANY TIMES.

BUT YOU REFUSE TO ACCEPT OUR APOLOGY.

THIS IS CRAZY.

YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK TO US, NOT EVEN WHEN WE'RE AT WORK.

THIS CAN'T GO ON.

NO, IT CAN'T.

HOLD UP, WAIT A MINUTE, DREW AND SAM ARE BACK IN BUSINESS.

WHAT?

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

IF HE CONTINUES THIS, THEN HE'LL BE DOING ALL THE WORK

WE'RE BEING PAID TO DO.

OH.

YES.

HM. SO YOU THINK YOU'RE SO SMART, DON'T YOU?

WELL YOU'RE NOT THAT SMART.

[ SILLY ACCENT ] NO, HE'S NOT.

SO GO ON, LITTLE DANNY.

WHY DON'T YOU GO ON AND JUST GO ON WITHOUT US

'CAUSE WE'LL ‐‐ WE'LL BE FINE.

'CAUSE YOU'LL BE DOING ALL THE WORK!

AND WE'LL BE GETTING ALL THE PAID.

BYE!

PFFT!

RUDE.

HE'S A RUDE BOY.

SO? WE DON'T CARE!

GO ON TO LUNCH WITHOUT US!

I DON'T NEED THE FIBER!

SAM.

WHAT?

DID YOU SEE THAT E‐MAIL HE JUST SENT US?

WAIT LET ME CHECK. OH, I'VE GOT MAIL.

I'M SORRY, HE WANTS US TO WHAT?

WHAT?

HE'S BILLING US AN INVOICE

FOR HIS TIME ON THE PROJECT?

YES.

OH, THIS HAS TO STOP, AND STOP NOW.

EXACTLY. COME ON.

WH‐‐ WHERE ARE WE GOING?

TO THE ONLY PERSON WHO CAN HELP US.

WE'RE GOING TO SEE THE WIZARD?

THE WIZARD OF HATTIE.

‐‐Captions by VITAC‐‐ www.vitac.com

CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS

♪♪♪♪

PICK UP!

HERE YOU GO.

THANK YOU, FLOYD.

YOU MIGHTY NICE.

YEAH. I SCORED LAST NIGHT.

HAD MYSELF A HOT DATE.

WHO'S THE UNLUCKY FELLOW?

YOUR DADDY.

WAIT, HOLD ON.

MY DADDY IS IN A HOME IN UPSTATE GEORGIA.

WHAT'S GOING ON, HATTIE?

Y'ALL DON'T WANT TO KNOW. I TOOK A DRIVE UP THAT WAY

TO SEE ANOTHER FRIEND OF MINE.

AND YOUR DADDY, HE SNATCHED ME OVER THERE IN THAT ROOM.

HATTIE!

WHAT, FLOYD, HE DID!

HE LIFTED MY DRESS UP OVER MY HEAD.

AND WE WENT TO ‐‐

FUNKYTOWN?

I'M GONNA BE SICK.

BETTER CALL HIS NURSE SO THEY CAN START THE ANTIBIOTICS.

YEAH, WELL, FOR DAD, FLOYD.

HEY, GRANDMA.

HEY, BABY DANNY.

I'LL HAVE THE USUAL.

OKAY.

DANNY'S GONNA TAKE A USUAL!

DANNY.

WE NEED TO TALK TO YOU.

GRANDMA, WOULD YOU TELL THEM THAT I'M NOT TALKING TO THEM?

BABY DANNY SAID HE AIN'T TALKING TO YOU TWO.

NOW, LOOK, WE HAVE WORK TO DO TOGETHER.

AND WE GOT YOUR LITTLE FUNKY‐ASS INVOICE.

MM‐HMM.

AIN'T NOBODY PAYING THAT.

MNH‐MNH.

GRANDMA, WOULD YOU TELL THEM THAT,

IF THEY DON'T PAY THE INVOICE, I WILL CALL CORPORATE

AND TELL THEM I DID ALL THE WORK.

BABY DANNY SAID HE DON'T HE ‐‐

WE HEARD HIS ASS.

NOW WATCH YOUR DAMN MOUTH. DON'T HOLLER AT ME, SAM.

I'M SORRY, BOO.

YOUR GRANDSON REAL PETTY.

WHAT THE HELL Y'ALL WANT?

THE USUAL?

YES.

YES.

ONE SIDE OF DYSENTERY COMING RIGHT UP!

YES.

THESE TWO FOOLS SAID THEY'RE GONNA HAVE THE USUAL.

NOW, DANNY, WE'RE NOT PAYING YOU.

NO, WE'RE NOT.

WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS ALL THIS TIME

AND YOU'RE MAD AT US BECAUSE OF ONE MISTAKE.

IT'S WRONG, DANNY. IT'S WRONG.

YEAH.

AND I ‐‐ I LOVE YOU.

LIKE ‐‐ LIKE I REALLY LOVE YOU.

AS A FRIEND.

WE HAD SOME REALLY GOOD TIMES TOGETHER.

DANNY, WE SAID WE'RE SORRY.

YOU KNOW WHAT? I CAN'T EAT.

NEITHER CAN I.

LET'S GO BACK TO WORK.

AND I'M GONNA GIVE YOU

YOUR LITTLE FUNKY‐ASS MONEY.

EVEN THOUGH I DON'T HAVE NOTHING IN THE BANK

'CAUSE MY FUNDS ARE INSUFFICIENT.

INSUFFICIENT FUNDS!

I HATE THIS PLACE!

EW, NEWBORN BABY RESIDUE, FRESH PLACENTA!

EAT UP, PEOPLE. EAT UP.

DANNY, YOU SEE WHAT YOU CAUSED?

NOW, YOU SEE THAT?

YOU SEE THAT, BABY DANNY, WHAT YOU DID?

WHAT?

LOOK, THEY LEFT HERE CRYING AND EVERYTHING.

DID YOU TELL THEM ABOUT MY DADDY?

SHUT THE HELL UP, FLOYD.

THEN WHAT WAS ALL THAT ABOUT, THEN?

BABY DANNY HERE STILL AIN'T SPEAKING TO HIS FRIENDS.

THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE DID WHAT THEY DONE TO ME.

YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT THAT, BABY DANNY.

AND YOU STILL MAD?

THEY MADE MY WIFE WALK OUT ON ME.

BOY, YOU NEED TO FORGE‐‐ THE HELL?

PFFT.

DANNY, YOU ARE WRONG.

LOOK...

WHAT? OKAY.

NO, WAIT, WAIT.

NOW, DO YOU FEEL ANYTHING FOR THE TWO OF THEM?

OF COURSE I DO.

BABY DANNY, LET ME TELL YOU

A LITTLE SOMETHING ABOUT HOLDING A GRUDGE.

OH DAMN, HERE WE GO.

WHAT, FLOYD?

YOU'RE GETTING READY TO TELL ONE OF YOUR

LONG‐BEHIND STORIES.

WELL, I WOULD LIKE EVERYONE TO LISTEN TO IT.

OKAY, GREAT. GO ON.

OKAY, WELL, IT WAS ME, IT WAS 1963, AND I'M ‐‐

YOU WERE IN THE CIRCUS.

DAMN SURE WAS, FLOYD, HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT?

HATTIE, ALL YOUR STORIES START WITH

WHEN YOU WERE IN THE CIRCUS, RIGHT?

WELL, I WAS IN THE CIRCUS.

I WAS THE FIRST AFRICAN‐AMERICAN FEMALE RINGMASTER IN THE WORLD.

LOOK, DANNY, YOU JUST GONNA HAVE TO LEARN

HOW TO FORGIVE, ALL RIGHT?

YOU JUST CAN'T KEEP DOING THIS, ALL RIGHT?

THAT'S THE SAME WAY MY STORY ENDED.

BABY DANNY, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING OTHER.

IF SOMETHING OTHER WAS TO HAPPEN TO THEM...

...WOULD YOU ‐‐ WOULD YOU CARE?

YES.

WOULD YOU BE SAD?

YES.

THEN YOU CAN'T KEEP

HOLDING NO GRUDGES, BABY.

THEY LEARNED THEIR LESSON.

HMM.

YOU THINK SO?

YEAH, I THINK SO.

BABY, LOOK, PEOPLE HAVE TO GROW UP

AND LEARN, MAKE THEIR OWN MISTAKES.

BUT YOU JUST DON'T ALLOW THEM TO KEEP MAKING THE SAME MISTAKE

OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

YOU GOT ME?

I GOT YOU, GRANDMA.

OKAY, BABY DANNY.

I WAS GONNA GIVE YOU A HUG. YOU A LITTLE SELF‐PITEOUS.

THANK YOU, GRANDMA.

YEAH. OKAY, BABY CAKE.

THE HELL?

Danny: HEY DAD, I'M HOME!

SHH, SHH! ALL THAT DAMN NOISE.

I DIDN'T WALK ON THE GRASS THIS TIME.

COME ON IN HERE, BOY. OKAY.

BOY, YOU BETTER NOT WAKE UP THAT BABY.

OKAY.

HEY, HOW YOU DOING?

I'M GOOD. YOU'RE GOOD?

YEAH. ALL RIGHT, WELL, LOOK,

YOUR MAMA'S UPSTAIRS.

‐OKAY. ‐BABY, WHO IS?

HEY, BABY.

HEY, MAMA. HOW YOU DOING?

I'M OKAY.

WHAT BRINGS YOU BY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY?

WELL...

OH. OH, Y'ALL GONNA TALK.

OKAY, ALL RIGHT, I'LL LEAVE YOU ALONE SO YOU CAN TALK.

THANKS FOR COMING BY FOR LUNCH.

[ LAUGHS ]

YOU KNOW I ALWAYS ENJOY LUNCH.

YES, BABY. YEAH.

WHAT Y'ALL UP IN HERE DOING?

LUNCH.

LUNCH.

WITH A BABY SLEEPING?

THAT'S HOW SHE GOT HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

GET YOUR MIND RIGHT, SON, GET YOUR MIND RIGHT.

YOU KNOW I LOVE TO COME AND SEE MY LITTLE ONE AND ONLY.

SHE'S UP THERE, LITTLE BABY SLEEPING!

AWW, DAD, I LOVE WHEN YOU SAY THINGS LIKE THAT.

I WAS TALKING ABOUT MY DAUGHTER.

YEAH, OKAY, HER TOO. SHE CUTE.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER, BABY.

OKAY. BYE, BABY.

SO, DANNY, WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?

SAM AND DREW.

OH, REALLY?

YEAH. GRANDMA THINKS THAT I SHOULD ‐‐

FORGIVE THEM?

YEAH.

AND I THINK SHE'S RIGHT.

YOU DO? YES, I DO, BABY.

LIFE'S TOO SHORT TO LET GOOD FRIENDS GET AWAY.

THEY'RE NOT GOOD FRIENDS, MAMA.

THEY MADE A MISTAKE OF PUTTING YOU AND TROY AGAINST EACH OTHER

AND YOU KNOW HOW SENSITIVE I AM ABOUT Y'ALL.

BABY, WE ALL KNOW HOW SENSITIVE YOU ARE.

BUT ‐‐ BUT THEY LOVE YOU, BABY.

THAT'S NOT LOVE. NO, IT'S NOT.

BUT THEY JUST WANT YOU ALL TO THEMSELVES, THAT'S ALL.

YOU JUST HAVE TO FIGURE OUT A WAY TO SHOW THEM

THAT YOU HAVE ENOUGH LOVE FOR ALL OF US

WITHOUT LOSING ANYBODY.

YOU THINK SO? YEAH.

BUT YOU HAVE TO LOVE ME THE MOST.

I DO?

BABY, GO BACK TO WORK

AND TELL YOUR FRIENDS YOU FORGIVE THEM

AND YOU WANT TO START OVER.

ARE YOU SURE? YES.

THEY'VE LEARNED THEIR LESSON. THEY WON'T DO IT AGAIN.

YOU THINK SO? I KNOW SO.

IT BREAKS MY HEART WHEN I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU.

[ GROANS ] ME, TOO.

AND, BABY, I KNOW WHAT THEY'RE FEELING.

I KNOW, MAMA.

JUST SO ‐‐ SO JUST GO DO IT.

OKAY, I WILL. I WILL.

HI.

SO, YOU'RE STILL NOT TALKING TO ME?

WE'RE GRANTING YOU YOUR WISH.

LOOK, I'M SORRY.

WHAT?

WANT TO SAY THAT AGAIN?

I'M SORRY.

I'M SORRY, YOU'RE SORRY, LET'S JUST PUT THIS ALL BEHIND US.

YOU CAN PUT ALL OF THAT BEHIND ME.

OR WE CAN PUT IT BEHIND YOU.

I DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR PREFERENCE IS,

THE ANSWER IS "YES!"

DANNY, YOU MEAN THAT?

YES.

I WOULD LOVE THAT.

YES.

ME, TOO.

OKAY.

AND WE PROMISE THAT

WE'LL NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN.

SHE'S RIGHT.

IT'S FINE, IT'S ‐‐ IT'S FINE.

AWW, THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU, TOO, MAN.

I LOVE YOU!

I MISSED YOU GUYS.

MM‐HMM, AND WE MISSED YOU.

YEAH.

‐I MISSED CUDDLING YOU. ‐WHOA, UNH‐UNH, NOPE.

TOO STRONG. TOO STRONG. OKAY, THAT'S...

...THAT'S ‐‐ THAT'S OVER.

YEAH, I KNOW, BUT I MISSED IT.

I'M CUDDLING WITH MY WIFE NOW.

YEAH, I KNOW. I'LL ALWAYS HAVE DREW.

THE HELL YOU WILL.

OKAY, NICE TO KNOW YOU GUYS ARE BACK TO NORMAL.

LOOK, I GOT A BONUS FROM THAT PROJECT.

THE ONE YOU JUST FINISHED?

YEAH, YEAH. AND THEY GAVE ME A TIP.

WE SHOULD SPLIT IT THREE WAYS.

REALLY, DANNY?

YES.

OH, MAN, THAT WOULD BE SO GREAT OF YOU.

YEAH, SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE ALL GO OUT DANCING?

I CALL TROY AND WE GO HAVE SOME FUN?

I LIKE IT. YEAH?

TROY?

DREW.

SORRY, I THOUGHT WE WAS BACK TO THE OLD OLD WAY.

I'M MARRIED.

OKAY, FINE, WE CAN CALL TROY.

OKAY.

I LOVE IT. SALSA HERE WE COME!

[ LAUGHS ]

SALSA!

SI.

HEY, TROY. YEAH, LOOK,

WE'RE GONNA PLAY HOOKIE FOR THE REST OF THE DAY.

MEET US DOWN AT PANTANA'S.

OKAY. OKAY, GREAT. BYE.

OKAY, SHE'S ON HER WAY. LET'S GO PARTY!

YEAH. YES, AY‐YAY‐YAY!

[ IMITATES GUNS FIRING ]

IF YOU CAN'T GO TO PANTANA NOCHE, WHERE CAN YOU GO?

I ‐‐ I DON'T KNOW, BUT LET'S GO.

WHOO!

IT'S GONNA BE A CRAZY NIGHT.

All: HACE FUEGO. HACE FUEGO. HACE FUEGO. HACE FUEGO.

WE WERE DANCING.

YEAH, BABY, YOU GOT THE MOVES.

I GRABBED YOUR HUSBAND'S ASS ON THE ELEVATOR.

DON'T. [ Laughs ]

[ Speaking Spanish ]

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT,

'CAUSE I GOT THE MOVES. I HAD ALL THE MOVES.

NO, NO, NO, ME AND MY WIFE GOT THE MOVES.

YEAH, PAPI. TE AMO, PAPI.

HEY, WELL, I WAS TRYING TO EH? EH?

AY, GRINGO, YOU DID PRETTY GOOD TO BE RHYTHMICALLY CHALLENGED.

AWW, LOOK AT US ‐‐ ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY.

BIG HAPPY.

HEY, YOU GUYS WANT TO COME AND PLAY SOME GAMES?

Both: YEAH!

NO. NO, THEY DON'T.

WELL, WHY NOT?

'CAUSE YOU GONNA PLAY THIS GAME.

OH.

SUCH A PARTY POOPER.

OH, MR. NASTY TIME.

DANNY, JUST LET US COME INSIDE.

NOPE.

WE COULD ALL HAVE A GOOD TIME INSIDE.

YOU DON'T WANT NONE OF THIS PANTANA PUNANA?

WHOA. IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY.

WHOA.

I'M SO HUNGRY.

LET'S GO TO MS. PEPPER'S HOUSE.

NO, I DON'T THINK SHE'S ALL RIGHT.

SHE'S ALL LEFT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

NO, WE HAVE SOME SASSY SAUCE IN THE FRIDGE.

I'M GONNA GET US IN HERE. I'M REALLY GOOD AT IT.

WELL, I DON'T HAVE MY KEY.

[ LAUGHS ]

HOW DO YOU FEEL?

I'M REALLY, REALLY DRUNK.

WAIT, I'M DRUNK, TOO. I CAN'T.

LET ME HELP YOU GET IT IN THERE.

I CAN'T GET IN. I CAN'T GET IN.

SAM, MOVE!

I'M GETTING ‐‐ HEY, IS THIS, IS THIS ALL YOUR REAL HAIR?

IS THIS ALL YOURS? [ LAUGHS ]

SAM, STOP!

WHOO.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I JUST...I'M JUST TRYING TO GO TO WORK.

YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO GO TO WORK?

YEAH. LIKE, ON ME?

LET ME COCK ‐‐ LET ME CLOCK IN.

LIKE RIGHT NOW RIGHT NOW?

LIKE FOUR MINUTES AGO.

IF YOU CAN'T GO TO WORK, WHERE COULD YOU GO?

WHERE COULD YOU GO? PANTANA'S!

WHERE COULD YOU GO? OH, YEAH.

GIRL, WHAT THE HELL YOU DOING?

SHUT UP. I TOLD YOU I GOT NEEDS.

GIRL, PLEASE, IT'S SAM.

I DON'T CARE. DO YOU FEEL WHAT HE DOING TO OUR NECK?

IMAGINE WHAT HE'D DO TO OUR ‐‐ WHEW!

HEY, HEY, WHAT THE...? HEY.

SHH. SHH.

PERSONALITIES ISN'T THE ONLY THING

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE MULTIPLES OF.

OKAY. HEY, LET'S GO INSIDE

BEFORE ONE OF US CHANGES OUR MIND.

AND I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT YOU AND ME.

I'M TALKING ABOUT HER AND HER FRIEND.

Both: FOURSOME!

Sam: YEAH, GIRL.