Original subtitles

THAT GETS ON MY DOGGONE NERVES.

HEY, GRANDMA.

IS THAT YOU, DANNY?

[ Chuckling ] WHO ELSE?

I DON'T KNOW.

THE GRANDSON I KNOW SLEEPS TILL 12:00 IN THE AFTERNOON.

AND FEELS SORRY FOR HIMSELF

'CAUSE HE CAN'T FIND A JOB.

WELL, I HAVE A JOB NOW, SO IT'S ME.

OH, I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.

YOU'RE UP AT 6:40 IN THE A. M.?!

YEP. I DON'T WANT TO BE LATE FOR WORK.

[ CHUCKLES ] OH, I'M SO HAPPY.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOUR GRANDMAMA WORKED FROM SUNUP TO SUNDOWN.

YOU KNOW MY MAMA HAD ME IN THE FIELD PICKING GREEN BEANS ‐‐

20,000 POUNDS FOR 3 CENTS A POUND.

DO YOU KNOW I WALKED SEVEN MILES ‐‐

IN THE SNOW WITH HIGH HEELS ON SINCE YOU WAS 7?

YEAH. I KNOW, GRANDMA.

WHY YOU ACTING ALL FUNNY

WHEN I'M TRYING TO GIVE YOU A BLACK HISTORY MOMENT?

I'M SORRY.

DON'T FORGET IT, EITHER, YEAH?

WAIT A MINUTE.

IF YOU'RE IN HERE, WHO IS THAT IN THERE ON THE SOFA?

NO, NO, NO. GRANDMA...

THAT'S ‐‐ THAT'S MAMA.

WHAT?!

[ SIGHS ] SHE GAVE ME HER OLD ROOM.

SHE SAID SHE DIDN'T DESERVE A BED.

OH, SHE HAVING A PITY PARTY, HUH?

SHE'S ‐‐ SHE'S HURT BY LIONEL.

I DON'T SEE WHY!

I TOLD HER HE WASN'T NO GOOD BEFORE SHE MARRIED HIM!

YOU KNOW, WHEN I WENT TO THAT WEDDING,

I WORE A BLACK DRESS...

A BLACK VEIL...

AND I HAD A BLACK SIGN

THAT SAID "DO NOT MARRY THIS BLACK BASTARD."

WHY DID HE DO THAT TO HER?

'CAUSE HE LOWDOWN, AND I BEEN TELLING HER THAT FOR YEARS.

YEAH, BUT MAMA'S SO SAD RIGHT NOW.

SAD?! SHE NEED TO GET UP AND GET IT IN GEAR.

LET ME GO GIVE HER SOME ENCOURAGEMENT.

NO. NO. NO. NO, GRANDMA.

WHY?

'CAUSE THE LAST TIME YOU TRIED TO GIVE ME SOME ENCOURAGEMENT,

I HAD A CONCUSSION.

ME SWINGING THAT HAMMER WAS TO ENCOURAGE YOU TO MOVE!

I CAN'T HELP IT 'CAUSE YOU MOVE SLOW!

ALMOST GOT IT THEN.

[ CHUCKLES ] YEAH.

I'LL TALK TO HER.

I'M ALL SHE HAS NOW.

WELL, WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE?

THE WALKING DEAD?

WELL, YOU ‐‐

YEAH. GO AHEAD. UH‐HUH.

LET IT ROLL OFF YOUR TONGUE,

'CAUSE IF IT ROLL OFF, I GUARANTEE YOU SOMEBODY

GONNA BE ROLLING YOU UP OUT OF HERE.

MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!

SHE GONE!

WHERE DID SHE GO?

I DON'T KNOW.

GRANDMA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M CHANGING THE LOCKS BEFORE SHE COME BACK.

GRANDMA.

‐‐Captions by VITAC‐‐ www.vitac.com

CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS

THE BOSS SAID YOU WERE SO GREAT.

THE CLIENT IS JUST SO HAPPY.

REALLY?

YES!

YEAH, THAT'S GREAT.

WHAT'S WRONG?

[ SIGHS ] IT'S HARD FOR ME TO BE HAPPY

WHEN MY MOTHER'S SO SAD.

AWW. THAT'S SO SWEET.

[ Sarcastically] ARE YOU AND YOUR MOM REALLY CLOSE?

YEAH.

I LOVE A MAN THAT'S SO CLOSE TO HIS MOMMY.

SHE'LL GET THROUGH IT.

[ SIGHS ] IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL ANY BETTER,

CRYSTAL'S REALLY UPSET ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED, TOO.

I MEAN, SO UPSET THAT SHE'S MOVING OUT OF THE BUILDING.

SHE HONESTLY HAD NO IDEA.

[ SIGHS ] I'M SURE SHE DIDN'T.

[ SIGHS DEEPLY ]

YOU'RE LATE.

I KNOW.

CRAZY PARTY LAST NIGHT.

ARE THOSE PANTIES?

OH, I'M SORRY.

I THOUGHT THIS WAS MY POCKET SQUARE.

SAM, YOU'RE STILL A WILD MAN.

YES, AND SO WAS SHE.

I‐I MEAN, SHE WASN'T A MAN. SHE WAS A WILD WO‐MAN.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.

WELL, KEEP IT UP AND YOU'RE GONNA GET FIRED.

[ As Sam ] YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.

PLEASE. SHE WOULD NEVER FIRE ME.

YOU SLEPT WITH HER, DIDN'T YOU?

GROSS!

I'M KIDDING. No, I'm not.

Twice.

HERE'S YOUR CHECK, SAM.

WE COVERED FOR YOU.

THANK YOU.

AND HERE IS YOUR CHECK, DANNY.

YOU KNOW, YOU COULD LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM DANNY.

HE GOT A GLOWING REVIEW FROM A CLIENT.

WELL, THAT IS GOOD TO HEAR.

THANKS.

DON'T BE JEALOUS.

I'M NOT.

THIS IS MY...BEST BUD, MY PAL, MY FRIEND.

WHAT DO YOU WANT, SAM?

NOTHING.

I'M GOOD.

SO, DO YOU FEEL BETTER NOW THAT YOU GOT YOUR JOB?

YES.

THINGS ARE STARTING TO LOOK UP FOR ME.

I'M FEELING MUCH BETTER.

GOOD.

FIRST PAYCHECK TODAY!

YEP. AND HE EVEN GOT A BONUS.

OH, WOW.

UP ‐‐ UNH‐UNH. WATCH HIM, DANNY.

HE WANTS MONEY.

NO, I DON'T.

WHAT DO YOU WANT, SAM? MONEY.

SAM, I JUST GOT THIS CHECK.

YEAH. AND YOU SHOULDN'T BE PARTYING ALL OF YOUR MONEY AWAY.

WHERE'S THE FUN IN THAT?

OKAY. WELL, A CARDBOARD BOX WILL BE A NICE TRICK FOR YOU

WHEN YOU'RE HOMELESS.

DANNY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO GIVE ME ANY MONEY, BUT ‐‐

GREAT.

[ SIGHS ]

SO...

YOU STILL LIVING WITH YOUR GRANDMOTHER?

'CAUSE THAT IS...CLICHé.

AND LAME.

COME ON. MOVE IN WITH ME.

SAM.

WHAT?

I CAN'T. YOU'RE A WILD MAN.

DIFFERENT WOMEN EVERY NIGHT?

YEAH.

PARTIES TILL DAWN?

YEAH.

AND DRINKING? YEAH.

WHY ARE YOU SMILING? WHY ARE YOU NOT?!

I LIVE THE GOOD LIFE.

[ CHUCKLES SARCASTICALLY ] FOR A FRAT BOY!

YOU'RE OUT OF COLLEGE NOW.

YEAH.

AND STILL THE MAN.

COME ON! MOVE IN WITH ME!

I LIVE IN AN AWESOME APARTMENT.

HOT CHICKS LIVE IN MY BUILDING.

HOT CHICK IN THE BUILDING.

IT'LL BE GREAT.

I CAN'T.

SO, YOU WANT TO GO ON LIVING WITH YOUR GRANDMA?

COME ON, MAN! I HAVE AN EXTRA ROOM!

COME ON! YOU COULD MOVE IN TONIGHT!

HOW FAR BEHIND IS YOUR RENT?

WILL YOU...STOP IT?

NO, SERIOUSLY. HOW FAR BEHIND IS YOUR RENT?

[ LAUGHS ]

COME ON, MAN.

NO. OH, YEAH. SURE THING.

YOU THINK ABOUT IT.

UNH‐UNH. YOU'RE GONNA PAY ME

FOR EVERY ONE OF THEM GREEN BEANS!

YOU DON'T SERVE THAT MANY GREEN BEANS I PUT ON THE PLATE!

WHY, YOU!

AND YOU'RE GONNA PAY ME FOR THEM, TOO!

DON'T COME BACK UNLESS YOU COMING TO PAY ME FOR THEM!

HATTIE, HATTIE, HATTIE! WHAT WAS WRONG WITH HIM?

FLOYD, THAT MAN JUST GOT UP AND LEFT!

HE SAID THIS HERE ORDER WAS WRONG!

WELL, YOU WROTE IT DOWN WRONG, HATTIE!

CAN YOU READ?!

CAN YOU SEE?!

DON'T EVEN ANSWER THAT.

I HEAR BATS CAN SEE REAL GOOD AT NIGHT.

HEY, MAMA. WHATCHA DOING?

BEFORE OR AFTER I KILL YOUR UNCLE?

UH, BABY, YOU LEFT THIS MORNING WITHOUT SAYING GOODBYE.

LIKE YOU CARE.

I DON'T!

BUT WHEN YOU LEAVE, I WANT TO KNOW SO IF YOU COME IN LATE,

I WON'T HURT YOU.

'CAUSE SEEING THIS IN THE DARK CAN KILL YOU.

THAT'S PURE BIRTH CONTROL RIGHT THERE.

I JUST HAD TO CLEAR MY HEAD.

WHOO! BET THAT TOOK ALL DAY.

LOOKING AT THAT BIG, OLD HEAD.

WELL, YOURS SURE WON'T TAKE LONG 'CAUSE IT'S EMPTY!

UH, BABY, WHILE YOU WAS OUT CLEARING YOUR HEAD,

DID A JOB SO HAPPEN TO FALL UP IN THERE?

MAMA, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO ANYTHING.

I MARRIED DANNY'S FATHER, AND HE WOULDN'T LET ME WORK.

THEN WHEN HE DIED, I MET LIONEL, AND HE WOULDN'T LET ME WORK.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU?!

A WOMAN GOT TO LEARN HOW TO TAKE CARE OF HERSELF!

WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

I'M DEPRESSED.

DEPRESSED?!

GIRL, WHEN I WAS GROWING UP,

WE DIDN'T KNOW NOTHING ABOUT NO DEPRESSION!

WE HAD A SODA, A SMILE, AND KEPT RIGHT ON MOVING.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

'CAUSE BACK IN THE DAY, ALL JESUS HAD TO DO

WAS JUST LAY HANDS ON HER AND SHE FEEL BETTER

'CAUSE SHE WAS WALKING RIGHT THERE BEHIND HIM.

GET THEE BEHIND ME, SATAN!

DON'T YOU GET NO CLOSER.

[ CELLPHONE VIBRATING ]

HELLO?

WHY SHE GOT TO WALK AWAY?

'CAUSE SHE TALKING TO LIONEL.

SHE GOING BACK WITH HIM.

NO, SHE'S NOT.

I'M TELLING YOU. I KNOW MY CHILD.

SHE'S GOING BACK TO HIM.

NO, SHE'S NOT. THAT'D BE CRAZY.

BABY, LOVING SOMEBODY MAKE YOU DO SOME STRANGE THINGS.

HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? YOU AIN'T NEVER LOVED ANYTHING.

HA! I SURE LOVED WHEN YOU WAS IN THE HOSPITAL.

I DON'T KNOW WHY MY OLDER BROTHER MARRIED YOU.

'CAUSE HE COULDN'T GET ENOUGH OF THIS SWEET THING.

[ GRUNTS ] [ GAGS ]

YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME SICK.

MAMA, WHAT TIME ARE YOU GETTING OFF TONIGHT?

ABOUT 7:00. WHY?

I WAS JUST WONDERING. LOOK, I HAVE TO GO.

UH, WHO WAS THAT ON THE PHONE?

NOBODY.

THEY TELL ME WHEN YOU HAVE CONVERSATIONS

WITH "NOBODY"...

THAT YOU ARE "CRAZY."

I SEE Y'ALL LATER.

SHE GOING TO SEE LIONEL.

YOU KNOW WHAT, HATTIE? I THINK YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT.

I KNOW I AM.

I'M JUST GONNA LOOK AT IT.

AND I'M NOT SAYING YES.

OKAY, OKAY.

[ LOCK DISENGAGES ]

WOW.

THIS IS NICE.

SEE? I TOLD YOU IT WAS NICE.

AND...YOUR OWN ROOM.

COME ON, MAN. SAY YES.

SAM, IF I SAY YES, WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO SET SOME RULES.

OKAY. ANYTHING.

PARTIES ONLY ON THE WEEKENDS.

THAT IS SO WRONG!

GET OUT!

GET OUT!

ALL RIGHT, FINE. COME ON.

[ LAUGHS ] I'M KIDDING.

[ CHUCKLES ]

DEFINE "WEEKENDS."

SAM.

DEFINE "PARTIES."

SAM! OKAY.

NO STRANGE WOMEN IN AND OUT OF HERE.

DEFINE "STRANGE."

DEFINE "WOMEN."

OKAY. THEY WON'T BE STRANGE.

THEY'LL BE IN AND OUT, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.

YOU KNOW, I‐I DON'T THINK THIS IS GONNA WORK.

OKAY, OKAY! THEN GO BACK TO YOUR GRANDMA.

WHO IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE?

YOUR GRANDMA HATTIE.

[ MUMBLING ]

YOU LOOK LIKE A VELOCIRAPTOR.

[ SQUAWKS ]

[ SIGHS ]

[ KEYS JINGLE ]

WELL, THIS IS NICE.

AND I'D HAVE MY OWN ROOM.

IT'S GONNA BE GREAT.

LIKE OLD TIMES.

BAND CAMP.

EXCEPT WITHOUT THE BRACES AND ACNE.

[ BOTH LAUGH ]

MAYBE A LITTLE ACNE.

JUST FROM YOUR FOREHEAD TO YOUR CHIN.

COME ON. SAY YES.

[ SIGHS ]

OKAY. YES.

[ LAUGHS ] GREAT.

JUST REMEMBER, RENT IS DUE ON THE FIRST OF THE MONTH.

I GOT YOU.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

DON'T OPEN IT.

WHY NOT?

JUST DON'T OPEN IT.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

Floyd: SAM, I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!

OPEN UP THIS DOOR!

IS THAT MY UNCLE FLOYD?

[ SIGHS ]

HEY, FLOYD.

YOU TRYING TO AVOID FLOYD?

NO, NOT AT ALL.

WHAT'S UP, DANNY? WHAT YOU DOING HERE?

YOU'RE THE SUPER OF THIS BUILDING?

YES, SIR.

SAM AND I ARE MOVING IN TOGETHER.

IS THIS ONE OF THOSE CIVIL UNIONS?

NO. WE'RE GONNA BE ROOMMATES.

OH. OKAY.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GETTING INTO?

'CAUSE THIS BOY RIGHT HERE LIKES TO PARTY.

[ Slowly ] YES, I DO.

YOU KNOW, THERE'S AN OINTMENT FOR THAT.

I KNOW.

[ LAUGHS ]

WHERE'S MY RENT?

I, UH...I HAVE AN EXCUSE FOR THAT. THAT, UH...

THIS IS NOT SCHOOL. YOU DON'T NEED A NOTE FROM YOUR TEACHER.

COME ON. WHERE'S THE RENT, BRO?

HERE. THANK YOU.

WAIT A MINUTE. THIS IS ONLY HALF.

DANNY?

WHAT? THIS IS MY FIRST DAY HERE.

[ CHUCKLES ] AND IT'S THE FIRST.

[ SIGHS ] DO YOU TAKE CHECKS?

DO YOU TAKE "HELL NOs"?

YOU'RE MY UNCLE!

I KNOW YOUR MAMA!

SHE DON'T HAVE A JOB.

I'LL HAVE IT FOR YOU IN THE MORNING.

YOU BETTER.

NOW, LOOK, I'M GONNA GIVE Y'ALL TO THE END

OF THE BUSINESS DAY TOMORROW,

OR THERE'S GONNA BE AN EVICTION, ALL RIGHT?

YOU'LL HAVE IT.

WELCOME TO THE BUILDING, DANNY.

EVEN THOUGH YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY WANT TO BE HERE FOR 24 HOURS.

HMM. DO I TAKE A CHECK?

[ SIGHS ] WELCOME HOME, ROOMMATE!

GOD, I HOPE I DON'T REGRET THIS.

I'M GONNA GO STRETCH IN THE NUDE.

WH‐‐ [ SIGHS ]

YOU KNOW I ALREADY TOLD YOU. [ DOOR OPENS ]

[ MUTTERING ]

HEY, MAMA. HEY, UNCLE FLOYD.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?

NOTHING.

WHY YOU ACTING LIKE YOU ON THAT STUFF?

I'M NOT ACTING ANY KIND OF WAY.

AM I MISSING SOMETHING?

A BRAIN.

BUT I'M GONNA LET IT SLIDE

UNTIL YOU SEE THE WIZARD.

WELL, I'M LOOKING AT A WARLOCK.

WITCH.

BASTARD.

WOULD YOU TWO STOP IT?

COME ON, GIRL. OUT WITH IT.

I'VE BEEN TALKING TO LIONEL.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU, FLOYD?

I'LL GET YOUR $10.

LINDA, THAT MAN IS NO GOOD FOR YOU.

WHY YOU DOING THIS TO YOURSELF?

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, UNCLE FLOYD?

YOU'VE ALREADY LEFT HIM.

NOW IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO MOVE ON GENTLY

LIKE I DID WHEN YOU WERE YOUNGER.

YOU PUT ME OUT WHEN I WAS 17.

WELL, THAT'S 'CAUSE YOU WAS TALKING BACK TO ME.

YOU ASKED ME WHERE THE VACUUM CLEANER WAS, AND I SAID, "HUH?"

YOU BETTER BE GLAD I DIDN'T SLAP THE TASTE OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!

BUT YOU TURNED ALL RIGHT, THOUGH, DIDN'T YOU?

NOT REALLY.

I'M BACK HERE WITH YOU.

WELL, THAT'S 'CAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO POISON A MAN!

AND GET HIS INSURANCE MONEY!

I TOLD YOU OVER AND OVER AGAIN TO BE THE BENEFICIARY.

REMIND ME NOT TO EVER EAT AT THE DINER AGAIN.

FLOYD, IF I HAD WANTED YOU DEAD, YOU WOULD BE DUST RIGHT NOW.

ACTUALLY, I'M GLAD YOU ALL ARE HERE.

I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.

I THINK I'M GOING BACK TO HIM.

WHY?!

WHAT DO I HAVE?

AND SHE CERTAINLY DOESN'T WANT ME HERE.

MM‐HMM. SURE TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT THAT RIGHT THERE.

OF COURSE. SHE'S YOUR MOTHER.

SHE WANTS YOU HERE.

DON'T SPEAK FOR ME, FLOYD!

HATTIE, YOU'RE WRONG.

NOW, LOOK...

IS IT BECAUSE YOUR MOTHER DOESN'T WANT YOU HERE?

IS THAT WHY YOU'RE GOING BACK TO HIM?

THAT'S PART OF IT.

BUT I DON'T HAVE A JOB, UNCLE FLOYD.

HOW AM I GOING TO LIVE?

I'M ALMOST 40 NOW. AND WHAT DO I HAVE?

I'M ABOUT TO CHOKE HER ASS TO SLEEP.

LET ME ASK YOU THIS.

IF YOU'RE GOING BACK TO LIONEL,

WHAT KIND OF EXAMPLE ARE YOU GONNA SET FOR YOUR SON?

I'M SENDING HIM A MESSAGE THAT IT'S OKAY TO FORGIVE.

NO, PRECIOUS.

YOU'RE SENDING HIM THE MESSAGE

THAT IT'S OKAY TO BE WALKED ALL OVER.

LISTEN, THIS IS MY LIFE, AND I APPRECIATE Y'ALL,

BUT I THINK I'M GOING BACK TO LIONEL.

NO! COME ON, LINDA.

OKAY, THEN. GET OUT.

MAMA. NO.

I DIDN'T RAISE NO FOOL FOR A DAUGHTER.

YOU AIN'T GOT TO GO HOME,

BUT YOU GOT TO GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

FINE, MAMA.

HATTIE, HOW YOU GONNA JUST PUT HER OUT LIKE THAT?

DON'T DO THAT.

THE HELL YOU PREACH!

AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ANYHOW?

IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET TO STEPPING, TOO.

GET OUT.

FINE.

I'VE BEEN PUT OUT OF HELL BEFORE.

I HATE YOU!

I HATE YOU, TOO!

SEE YOU AT THE DINER TOMORROW.

ALL RIGHT.

LOVE YOU. LOVE YOU, TOO.

[ DANCE MUSIC PLAYING ] [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

SAM.

Sam: [ Muffled ] YEAH!

WHOO! YEAH!

SAM, I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!

WHAT?! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! THE MUSIC'S TOO LOUD!

SO TURN IT DOWN! I'M TRYING TO GET SOME REST!

WE'RE TRYING TO STAY AWAKE!

SAM, YOU'RE NOT LISTENING! WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?!

THIS! FOR YOU!

I WOULDN'T TOUCH THAT BEER TO SAVE MY LIFE!

WELL, THIS BEER'S ABOUT TO SAVE MINE!

JUST GO! JUST GO!

OKAY, OKAY!

I'M COMING!

DENISE!

CRYSTAL!

CHERYL!

SAMANTHA!

AND WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS WITH THE RED HAIR!

WHOO! Woman: WHOO! [ LAUGHS ]

Sam: OH, YOUR NAME IS DEREK!

[ DOOR SHUTS ] OH, GOD.

[ SIGHS ]