Original subtitles

[music]

Hey,

You shouldn't smoke so much. You really

shouldn't after all those dreadful

warnings.

>> Mrs. Carpenter's husband gave it up and

he got run down by a bus a week later.

>> That's got nothing to do with him giving

up smoking.

>> No, but it didn't do him any good, did

it?

>> Mrs. Craig,

I'm Miss Pinson, your area supervisor.

Were you smoking, Mrs. Craig?

No, it's against company rules. I shall

report you.

>> You do that area supervisor. She's all

mouth and trousers.

Spies in bags out.

Good morning, Mrs. Bweather. Morning,

miss.

[music] Sparting [ __ ] out.

Jim.

Jim.

Where the hell is he?

Morning, Sid. See here. Ah,

>> you got my wire.

>> What's good about it? Yes, I got your

wire. Would I have got up in the middle

of the night to be here otherwise?

>> You're lucky I've been up all night in a

blasted train. I couldn't get a sleep

and no breakfast either.

>> Well, what's all the excitement about?

>> Poor McFarland. He can't raise the

money. He's dropping out.

>> Then Walden's take over. It'll fall

through. Not on your Nelly. It won't

mate.

Sydney. Sydney. My boy. You and I are

going to make a bid to take over

Waldron's properties on our own. Sydney,

you're so quick. The shares were down to

15 bob last night. We are going to offer

Waldron a pound. Cash. [snorts]

>> A pound? Cash? Jim Ryder, have you gone

raving mad?

>> Where's that dumb blonde put that

Waldron far?

I found her. Huh? Look, as soon as I got

that wire, I knew it meant trouble.

Anyway, where the hell are we going to

find the money?

>> Borrow it.

>> Borrow it. But 40%. Now, I know you've

gone mad.

>> Of course I have.

[laughter]

>> You buy me breakfast. I'll explain why.

Come on, we'll go to that cheap dump

around the corner. Won't cost you so

much.

>> Cash. [laughter]

I'd give them a quid out me own pocket

if only they'd stop walking over my

clean floor.

Dear,

>> I thought I heard voices.

>> Couldn't you finish this floor yet?

>> I did, but herd of rhinoceros just went

through.

>> Rhinoceroses.

>> Oh dear.

>> Well, he doesn't want it. I [music] know

somebody like theirs.

>> Good morning, Mrs. C.

>> Morning, Colonel.

>> Bills, bills, bills.

>> They say rain's on the way.

>> Well, I hope so. I need heavy going for

epsom this week.

>> You and your horses. What happened to

that one yesterday? You know the one

what couldn't lose

>> last in a field of 15.

>> Well then better luck next time.

>> How long can this sort of luck last Mrs.

C? It doesn't matter what it is. Horses

dogs the boat race. I get a tip to buy

Billings machine tools straight from the

horse's mouth. I buy the shares. They

double their profits.

>> Well, that's nice, isn't it?

>> Lovely. What did they do? They dropped

half a crowd.

>> Oh, you never can tell with horses.

>> Horses? You don't listen to a word I

say, do you?

>> Oh, yes, I do. I don't understand a word

of it, but I do listen.

Oh,

I've got something for you.

>> What is it?

Oh, a cigar.

Good condition, too. Where did you pinch

this?

>> I didn't pinch it. I don't pinch things

as well you should know.

>> Mrs. See, you didn't buy it. There's no

band. And it's been pierced.

>> That's why I took it. I found it in the

waste paper basket.

>> Oh, thanks very much. Very kind thought.

>> Now, you sit there and have a little

smoke. It'll do you good. I'll go and

make you a nice cup of tea.

[music]

Mrs. Cia.

>> Oh dear, you did give me a turn.

>> I'm sorry. Where did you get the cigar?

>> Why? What's the matter with it? Isn't it

any good? Just shows you can never tell.

Can you posh offices and all?

>> There's nothing the matter with the

cigar. Yeah, it's probably one of the

best cigars that's made. Where did you

get it?

>> Place where I work early mornings. I saw

it lying there and I says to myself, I

says, "Oh, that colonel would love

that." I says, "So I TOOK IT." HE DIDN'T

want it.

>> THIS IS WHO is he? The man I work for,

Mr. Ryder.

>> Not James Ryder.

>> That's him. Jim Ryder.

>> You know him well enough to call him

Jim.

>> OH, ME? NO. I'VE NEVER spoken to him in

mid life. Well, what's so special about

him anyway?

>> Nothing really. He's just one of those

wide boys who's making a fortune just

now out of property development.

>> Oh, he can't be the same bloke. If you'd

have heard him carrying on about a quid

one way or the other, and he'd have to

borrow that anyway.

>> What wouldn't I give to know what's

going on in his mind?

>> Not much, I shouldn't think. If you

could have seen the way they was

marching up and down on my clean floor,

I could HAVE KILLED HIM STONE DEAD, THE

PAIR of them. I thought the other bloke

was going to drop dead when he said he

was going to offer Waldron a quid. Mrs.

Craig, are you sure he said that? Sure

as I'm here. He said, I am going to

offer Waldron £1 cash. Give me quite a

turn it did cuz Waldron was Mr. Craig's

second name.

You Oh, dear. Another one for the nut

house if you ask me.

>> Yes. All right, I'll hold on.

>> Here's your cup of tea. It's getting

cold.

>> Damn the tea. I'm sorry, Mrs. C, but

this is important. This is probably the

hottest tip I've ever had.

>> Dear, oh dear. You and your OC.

>> Mrs. C, this has nothing whatever to do

with Yes, I'm holding on. You see, a

chap was going to buy a firm called

Waldrons. According to this, he changed

his mind. The shares will go down. I

shall buy some. Then I shall wait for

Ryder to make his offer. The shares will

rise and I'll sell them at a profit.

It's as simple as that.

>> Yeah, it's just about as simple as that

O that couldn't lose yesterday. I'll

make you fresh on, sir.

>> Yes. Yes, I am holding on.

>> Your cousin, the gallant colonel.

>> Oh, well, blime me. More dad tips.

>> Hello, Sarah. What can I do for

>> Rodri, can you give me a quotation for

Waldron this morning?

>> I might have guessed he wants a

quotation on Waldron's. Listen, one hour

ago the news broke that McFaran's bid

had been withdrawn. We haven't been off

the phone since. You can't even give

them away.

>> You can't? Splendid. I want you to buy

me £5,000 worth of Waldron's Ordinaries.

>> 5,000?

Are you completely out of your tiny

mind? Where the hell could you find

5,000 quid?

>> I don't have to find it. I'm buying it

for the account.

>> For the account?

>> My dear idiot, you realize they got to

be paid for eventually. And on the

present showing, they wouldn't be worth

the paper they're printed on.

>> I'll give you security.

>> Security? is such as what?

>> Pair of cufflings, a watch.

>> Sorry, old man. I'm a stock broker, not

a porn broker.

>> I wasn't thinking of cufflinks or a

watch. I was thinking of this house.

>> Do I get this right? You'll put that

house up against my buying £5,000 worth

of Walden shares.

>> Yes. Get your solicitor to send the

deeds round right away.

>> Bye, sir.

>> Well, Mrs. Greg, I've done it. I've

plumbed four aldrons up to the hilt.

>> Well, I hope it wins. Here's your tea.

>> If it does, we'll split the profits

50/50.

>> Well, that's very kind of you, Colonel.

But if you don't

>> No, no, no. I insist. One doesn't get a

tip like that every day. Fair's fair.

50/50.

>> I WAS ABOUT TO SAY, COLONEL, as I

haven't had no wages for the past

Fortnite, so that'll be 210 if you don't

mind.

>> Well, I am a little bit short of the

ready this week. I wonder if you could

possibly wait till next Monday. Looks as

though I shall have to, doesn't it?

>> Thank you.

>> If we get control of Waldrons, we can

take over this site just like that.

Think of it. All under one conveyance.

One owner due for demolition in the next

10 years. Nice and tidy. Eh, if we get a

wig on, we can have the whole thing

completed in 8 10 months, say a year at

the outside.

>> Hey, I still don't like it, Jim. I mean,

we we we've got enough on our plate as

it is. Do you realize if id have

listened to your gloomy warnings, we'd

still be in Stephanie with 18 quid in

the bank. And you made sure I could only

get that out. Three quid a day, didn't

you?

>> 18 quid is a lot more than we've got in

the bank at the moment. Jim Ryder,

>> what about

>> Hello.

>> What they kick?

>> Yes, sir. Will you hold on a moment,

sir? I'll just see if he's in out.

>> Come down. I got the tip this morning.

>> Excuse me, sir. You're wanted on the

telephone.

Hello, Ryder.

What?

What?

No, I certainly did not.

Okay, thanks.

Only two people knew that we'd made a

takeover bid for Waldrons. You and I.

Have you been talking?

>> No.

>> Why?

>> Because this morning somebody bought

5,000 quid worth. What? They sent the

price up for one and six months already.

Come on, we better get back. I'll get in

contact with Waldrons before the price

rises any higher.

>> Hello. Oh, hello, Rodri. What's been

happening? I've been trying to get you

all the morning.

>> Well, I didn't think they could sink any

lower, but they managed it.

>> Lower? Oh, no.

>> And I was just coming around to measure

the house for carpets and curtains when

the rumor of the right takeover began to

circulate. The share started to rise and

the rumor was confirmed and they

rocketed.

>> Rocketed? Well, what are they standing

at now?

>> 19 and6. This means you've already

doubled your investment.

>> Yes, you've made a nice cool £5,000.

>> Sell them. Sell the lot.

>> You're a lucky devil. You must have had

a tip straight from the horse's mouth.

>> From my char lady.

>> Char lady.

>> Good morning, canon.

>> Good morning, Mrs. C.

>> There we are.

Hello.

You don't look too good. You stay there

and I'll get you a nice pickme up. And

what brought this little lot on if it's

not a rude question,

>> Mrs. C, you remember when we bought

those shares? I told you we'd split the

profit 50/50.

>> Yes. So you did. I'd forgotten all about

it. Don't you worry about that. Here,

take this. It'll make you feel better.

I'll go and put the kettle on your tea.

We're ready.

>> In fact, when I bought the shares, I see

I didn't realize what might happen.

Oh, Colonel, you haven't lost a lot of

money over that bit of paper I give you,

have you?

>> No, no, no. I didn't lose money, Mrs.

Craig. I made it.

>> You made it. Oh, I am glad. Isn't that

nice? You could do with a few quid.

>> Yes, it's more than a few quid, Mrs.

Craig. It's quite a lot more.

>> More?

>> Yes. Guess? Um

£50

>> more.

>> Not £100.

>> More.

>> More.

Not as much as £200.

>> Yes, Mrs. Greg. As much as £200.

>> Oh, well, that's wonderful, isn't it?

And remember, you're in 50/50.

>> Oh, no.

>> Oh, nonsense, Mrs. Greg. I insist a

bargain's a bargain.

>> £200.

I go and make the tea.

>> No, Colonel. That money, it isn't right.

>> Well, I I may have slightly

underestimated it. You see, I'm not very

good at figures.

>> No, Colonel. It was your idea.

>> Yes, but Mrs. Are you?

>> No. I will take £50 and not a penny

more.

>> Is that as much as you expected?

>> As much as I

didn't expect a blast farthing. I go and

make the tea.

>> It was real kind of you giving me that

£50, Colonel. I know you did promise me

half, but a lot of people would have

kept their mouth shut,

>> and I would have BEEN NONE THE WISE, HOW

WOULD I?

>> NONSENSE, MRS. GREG. You had my word as

an officer, and I trust a gentleman.

>> Oh, you could have told me you only made

a fiverr. I'd have been quite happy.

That's half your trouble, Colonel.

You're too honest.

>> [music]

>> And all we was a bit pushed for the

street outing and the kids don't half

enjoy that. No mistake. So it was lucky

for them you made that £200, was it?

>> I didn't.

>> Didn't what?

>> I didn't make £200.

>> But you distinctly told me.

>> Never mind what I told you, Mrs. Craig.

I didn't make £200.

I made £5,000.

Did you say £5,000?

>> I did, Mrs. Craig.

I think perhaps it'd be safer if I were

to give you your share right away.

>> Now, just a minute, Colonel. Let me get

this straight.

Are you telling me that you made £5,000

out of that bit of paper I give to you?

>> That and a little bit of specialized

knowledge.

>> Then somebody must have lost £5,000.

>> No, nobody lost £5,000, Mrs. Craig. We

bought shares at a certain price and

sold them at a better price. That's high

finance.

>> That smells to me.

>> Oh, that's what the stock exchange is

for, Mrs. Craig. so that ordinary

people, you know, people like you and I

can express our trust in this or that

industrial concern and keep the great

wheels of commerce turning.

>> I didn't see no wheels of commerce. All

I saw was a bit of paper and I didn't

have no confidence in that cuz I didn't

know what was written on it, did I? And

you didn't have no confidence neither.

Cuz you never knew it existed. Not until

I give you that cigar wrapped up in it.

IT ISN'T RIGHT. IT CAN'T BE. A FEW

POUNDS IS ONE THING, BUT £5,000 IS A

DIFFERENT KETTLE OF FISH.

>> NONSENSE, MRS. GREG. PEOPLE ARE DOING IT

ALL THE TIME.

>> NOT PEOPLE LIKE ME. AND THERE MUST BE

SOMETHING WRONG SOMEWHERE.

>> MRS. GREG, THERE'S NOTHING WRONG. YOU

DON'T THINK I do anything dishonest, do

you?

>> Yes.

>> Well, I didn't in the end, did I? Well,

it's legal, Mrs. Craig. What's legal

can't be dishonest.

>> In that case, there won't be any harm in

my telling him about it, will there?

>> Telling who?

>> Mr. Ryder. It was his bit of paper and

he can have this and all. After all, it

must be his. It was him what had the

confidence.

>> But you're not going to take my check to

Mr. Ryder.

>> I am. My mind is made up. There is NO

TIME LIKE THE PRESENT.

Come in.

Good morning. Can I help you?

>> Good morning, miss. I'm the lady what

does hear of a morning?

>> Oh, yes.

>> Well, I was wondering if I might see the

gentleman.

>> Oh, Mr. Ryder.

>> Of course, if they had their way, they'd

bang us all into crowded grotto like

what the Germans did. I told you it was

big business. And if a superb block of

luxury offices ain't big business, I'd

like to know what is. Spider Enterprise

Limited. Sounds like a cartle to me.

>> What's a cart?

>> Well, anyway, they're the worst. You

mark my words. They'll they'll they'll

ground us all to pieces just like the

rest of them.

>> Ground us to pieces? Who?

>> The capitalists. And and and what will

they say when our bellies are flapping

for lack of bread?

>> What will they say?

>> Let them eat cake. Oh, I like cake.

>> What can I do for you?

>> Well,

>> yes.

>> Mr. Baker of Southern Demolition for

you, sir.

>> Put him through.

>> Ryder.

>> All right. There's George here.

>> Hello, George.

>> Hello, mate. Are you all right?

>> Oh, fine. Oh, boy. Fine. I've uh got a

little job for you.

>> Oh.

>> I want you to uh give me a price. I'm

pulling down some houses in Pit Street.

>> I'll be back.

>> No, Pit Street. You know, it's a

property we've just taken over.

>> Hey, are you in a hurry about it, mate?

>> Of course I'm in a hurry.

>> Any sitting tenants?

>> Sitting tenants? Well, aren't there

always, old boy? [laughter] Don't you

worry about it. I'll have him out of

there before you can say bulldozer.

>> Yeah, careful.

>> Good. Well, I'll pick you up in a few

minutes and we'll go straight down to

the site.

>> All right. I see you down there, Jim.

out of it.

>> Now, Mrs. Craig.

>> Well, sir, there were two things really.

>> Two.

>> Look, sir, this won't take up very much

of your valuable time.

So, you're the man who's going to pull

down Pit Street.

>> That's right. You live there?

>> Yes, I do. And all me friends live

there. And all

>> I get it and have asked you to use your

position here to persuade me not to pull

it down.

>> Nobody has asked me to do nothing. I've

come here off me own bat.

>> Now look, Mrs. Craig, the world is

changing, and it's no good you and your

friends resisting that change. You've

got to accept it, assist it, and if

possible, anticipate it. Let me tell you

what the ministry says about Pit Street.

These buildings are scheduled for

demolition in the next 10 years as they

no longer measure up favorably to the

required standards of housing.

>> Those houses are no better nor no worse

than the day they was built. They

haven't changed. And human beings

haven't changed neither. They've still

got two legs and two hands, haven't

they? And they've only got one head.

Nothing's changed. Some of them families

have lived in their houses all their

lives. They've grown up together. Why?

There's one old lady there of over 80.

She's lived there 60 years.

>> It's about time she had a change then.

Is it?

It's always the same with progress. As

soon as anybody wants to build anything,

somebody squawks.

Now look, Mrs. Craig, if you and your

friends had any sense, they'll take the

alternative accommodation I'm offering

and get moving.

>> Alternative accommodation? And what had

you in mind for me?

>> Well, let's see.

Ah, here's a nice little house in

Burough.

>> Bert Bar? I wouldn't live there if you

paid me. That's one of them new towns,

isn't it?

>> I don't understand you people. The

minister goes to all his trouble and

expense at building these new towns.

Take Burke.

>> You take it.

>> He's got the lot pubs.

>> I got a pub.

>> Dance holes.

>> Dance holes.

>> Golf course.

Do you know I haven't had a round of

golf for I don't know how long.

>> All right then. What has Pit Street got

that Burke Butter hasn't?

>> Me friends.

And I'm not getting out. And you can't

bundle us into the street because the

law wouldn't let you. You're forgetting

that.

>> And you're forgetting that technically

this is a condemned slum.

[snorts]

>> Slum indeed.

>> Yes. Slum. And any judge would land a

sympathetic to any proposition I might

make. Especially as I'm offering

alternative accommodation.

>> He might and then again he might not.

>> Granted, and if he didn't, I could

appeal. Can't you see you're playing a

game you can't possibly win?

>> You mean because we haven't got no

money?

>> Partly.

>> Their money isn't everything.

>> You mean it's something else?

>> Oh,

it might do you a bit of good to want

for something, me, lad. To know what

it's like to struggle. Manet, let me

tell you something.

Do you know Orington Street?

>> Yes. Old Pinton Street, just behind Pit

Street. I was born there, number 13. Do

you know how much my old mother got when

she was a child? A bloody sight less

than what you get now? 9 P an hour.

That's what she got when she could get

it.

When the landlord kicked her out of the

ass, there was no alternative

accommodation. She went into a work

class. I went into an O. I learned

>> nobody gives you anything for nothing.

>> D.

>> Of course they don't. G.

>> You think I'm hard, don't you? Maybe I

am.

Good business is cinematomics. If you

want anything, you've got to go out and

get it. As long as it's legal.

So long as it's legal.

Thank you, sir.

I'll remember that.

>> That letter, is it for me?

>> No, sir. It's for me.

>> So, you didn't give him back his check,

Mrs. Craig?

>> No. I want you to

what do you call it? Reinvest it.

>> Reinvest it. Oh, I don't think I'd care

to do that. You see, it wouldn't be the

same next time. I only wish we could get

a tip like this every day.

>> There is no reason why we shouldn't.

Do you know what he said to me? He said

to me, "If you want something, go out

and get it any way you can." He said it.

I didn't. So he's only got himself to

blame for what happens next.

>> Next.

>> What's been done once can be done again

and again?

>> Well, steady on, Mrs. Greg. I mean, I

don't know what.

>> Do you know these people?

>> Well, of course, these are household

names in the city. Property tycoons,

investment trusts, washing machines.

These are some of the smartest operators

there are. But you don't work for them,

do you?

>> No. But I know the ladies who do.

I'm not having nobody telling me where

I'm going to live. And the only way to

stop them pushing us around

is to fight them.

>> What? Where? Where we going to get the

money?

>> Where everybody else gets it from? We

are going to make it.

>> Make it how?

>> Out of bits of waste paper that we find

lying about in the offices what we

clean. Oh, I don't think that would be

much good, Mrs. Craig. Mom had 200

copies of Ravali. She wanted me to sell.

And when I took them to the fish shop,

they only gave me a shilling.

>> Do you mind? We are not going to sell

this waste paper. We are going to make

use of it for information.

>> Information?

>> There is lots of information to be had

from waste paper baskets, blotters,

writing pads, and such like. But we do

nothing dishonest. Understand? Nothing

that isn't strictly legal.

>> What Mrs. CRAIG MEANS OW WHAT MRS. Craig

means is we only make use of material

which is in the public domain. Things

that have been thrown away or left lying

around for anyone to see.

>> No opening of drawers or pri private

letters if you know what I mean.

>> I don't know what you mean. I don't know

what the hell you're talking about.

>> We just pick up anything what looks

interesting and hand it over to the

colonel. It'll be my job to examine and

evaluate the contents.

>> Oh dear.

>> And acting on the information evaluated.

We buy stocks and shares and such like.

>> What with?

>> With with money, of course. What the

hell do you usually buy things with? You

can't make money without money. What

could we raise? We'd be lucky to put up

40 quid between the lot of us.

>> We shall start with a modest capital of

£5,000.

Oh,

did I hear you say 5,000?

>> 5,000 is what Mrs. Craig and I made this

week from one piece of information from

one waste paper basket.

>> Oh, I'm sorry. My obby would never I

mean, we've always been a respectable

family. I couldn't be a party to

anything like that.

>> But why not, Madam? It's perfectly

legal.

>> No, it couldn't be. Not like bingo or

the football pools. But it's exactly

like the football pools except that we

know the results beforehand. Does that

satisfy you, Mrs.

>> Merryweather?

I suppose, sir.

>> A stock exchange is a cankerous growth

on the dying body of capitalism, a slave

market for the buying and selling of the

workers. After revolution, there won't

be no stock exchange.

>> Now, do leave off about the perishing

revolution. Are you coming in or

stopping out? Well,

>> well, seeing the revolution don't seem

to be happening yet a while. All right.

Yeah. Well, don't you forget it's

against me principles to make money out

of the exploitation of the workers.

>> Very well, then. I'll set about forming

the company and finding us some office

premises. And don't forget, absolute

secrecy is essential. A careless word to

a husband or a fellow char, I mean

office cleaner, and well, need I go on?

>> Well, if you're sure it's all right.

Well, of course it's all right. Good

heavens, there's nothing to prevent any

of you ladies being accepted into the

Salvation Army. Now, there are only two

things to remember. You may be able to

obtain useful information from other

ladies in your profession. Pick their

brains by all means don't confide in

them. And remember, however well we do,

we shall all of us have to go on being

char ladies. I mean, of course, I shall

have any question.

Yes,

I'm I'm sure it's a wonderful

organization.

I don't want to join.

>> Do you want to join us? Why not?

>> I want to join you. I don't want to join

the Salvation Army. It's them acts.

I'll run yours down. No, it's all right.

I'LL DO IT.

>> OH, DON'T BOTHER, MRS.

>> NO BOTHER. Two's as easy as one.

[music]

>> Good morning, Mrs. Harris. going miss.

It's all clear

[music]

32

33 That's it. Oh no. Can't That looks

foreign.

>> Perhaps it's 53.

53.

>> Oh, come along ladies. You're late.

>> How do you expect us to find the place

when you've got that lard zulu on the

door?

>> Not very bright, are we? That's our

name. Ladies who do ladies who do.

>> Oh, yes. Very comical.

>> This must be costing us a bomb. Well,

it's one of the finest addresses in the

city. Naturally, it's not cheap.

>> How much?

>> Well, including the rates, the [snorts]

central heating, and of course, the

lift, it comes to

>> Don't tell me. It'll spoil me.

>> Well, ladies, welcome to the first board

meeting of Ladies Who Do Limited. I see

you've all brought your basic material

with you. Now, remember, information is

the source of all wealth, and hidden in

these shopping bags is the information

we need. All we have to do is to sift

and sort and sift again. Naturally,

there'll be a lot of rubbish, but among

the rubbish will be what we're looking

for. Glittering, shining gold. Well,

now, have any of you ladies any

questions? Well, shall we get on with

the business?

Excuse

me. I'm his lady cleaner.

>> Am I his what? Certainly not. I'm his

wife.

Well, you said to develop contacts.

>> I meant with fellow office cleaners, not

the wives of our national leaders.

Well, now ladies, I have to report very

satisfactory progress. Our cash balance

now stands at £26,07

shillings and four pins hon

>> what on earth are you doing Mrs. Craig,

>> morning, miss. Still cold.

>> I said, what are you doing, Mrs. Craig?

>> Mosquito place is teeming with them.

It's the central heating.

>> It isn't on.

>> Uh, no, that's just the point. It's cold

outside, so they come inside looking for

the warmth. When they can't find it,

they try to get out again, mistake the

mirror for the window, and get stuck on

the glass.

Guess what I FOUND IN MY TOILET?

>> A MOSQUITO.

>> That's right. A dirty great mosquito.

>> See, THE PLACE IS TEEMING WITH THEM.

He's done it again.

up another 12. They've gone mad.

It's uncanny. How does he do it? He

doesn't know anything or anybody. Well,

>> for somebody who doesn't, he's doing

very well.

>> This means he's nearly doubled his

capital again.

Why didn't I buy any of the wretched

things?

That'll be all.

Well, gentlemen, we've all been hit by

this thing.

I'm getting so jumpy I don't even trust

myself.

What we want to know is who is this

Witforth fell? Where does he get his

information?

>> He seems to be able to anticipate every

move I make.

>> Gentlemen, has it occurred to you that

he may be an agent?

>> What the hell for?

>> Some foreign power who shall remain

nameless?

>> Oh, not them again. Oh my god,

>> Mr. Ryder. Perhaps you have a better

explanation.

>> Perhaps he's psychic. Spiritualists say

that the power of transferring thought.

>> I'm interested in the power of

transferring shares. Now, let's get down

to cases. Take this wardrobe business. I

hadn't discussed it with a soul, living

or dead, not even my partner. It was all

in my mind.

>> Do you talk in your sleep?

I'm not married. [music]

I expect you're wondering why I've

called this special meeting. Well, two

pieces of information have recently come

into our possession. Neither of them of

much importance alone, but together.

Well, let me explain. On the one hand,

we know that the shares of an Irish

concern, Pig Producers Limited, have

fallen. Apparently, they're having

marketing difficulty. Your scribbling

pad, Mrs. Higgins.

On the other hand, your blotting paper,

Mrs. Greg. Cash and Carry Supermarkets,

one of the largest in the country, has

bought land within 5 miles of pig

producers. They are planning to open a

bacon curing factory. This will send the

shares of Pig Producers Limited

rocketing.

>> That makes sense.

What's on your mind, Colonel?

>> I suggest we go for the killing. Put the

lot on Pig Producers.

>> The lot?

Well, it's taking a hell of a risk,

isn't it? Well, of course it's a risk,

but we might wait a lifetime to get two

bits of information like this.

>> Putting money on pigs. It's like putting

money on horses in it.

>> Well, I don't see why. I mean, after

all, the pigs are there. They're going

to build the factory. The shares must

double. If it comes off, we shall have

£120,000 in the kitty.

>> Well, ladies, shall we vote on it? Those

in favor?

>> But I can't sit here all day. Hey, I got

me iring to do.

>> I always did fancy a bit of Irish bacon

myself.

>> Well, might as well be hung for a pig as

a lamb.

>> What are we voting for?

>> Pigs.

>> Carried unanimously.

We can get him into signing an

undertaking a move straight away. It's

worth paying them 100 quid each.

>> I don't like it, Jim. I don't like it. I

mean, legally, they're in the right.

>> Oh, go blind. Here we go again. Can't

you understand? Unless we get moving

right away, we're going to have to

borrow money at 50% to pay back a 40%

loan.

>> Jim, Jim, you

I can't understand these people around

here.

They'd be much better off in one of

those new towns like that one we passed

through on a great north road the other

week. Marvelous. And another thing, I'm

surprised to you, a working man. A lick

spittle for the capitalist bosses. And

look at you. Not an ounce of flesh on

you. Probably weeks since you had a

square meal. What did you have for your

dinner? If you had any dinner, I'm

asking you. What did you have for your

dinner?

>> But I'm trying to tell you. As a matter

of fact, I didn't have it.

>> No, of course you didn't. And what about

your bosses? Eh, look at them sitting

there stuffing themselves with goose and

caviar. Yeah. Will you go and tell them

that the bourgeoa and proletarian blood

will mingle in the gutters of the

charing crossroad before they get us out

of here? Go on. Oh, tell them. Come on.

[music]

>> Go on. Try one. I think you'll find them

very nice.

>> Oh, [snorts] is it clear?

>> Oh, we have to put the hole in, don't

we? Oh. Ah. Mrs. Gubbins. Oh yes,

>> you have arrived just in time to see

your husband receive a sum of £100.

>> Oh, whatever for.

>> All you have to do is to sign this

undertaking to move within the next

month.

>> Oh, we couldn't do that, I'm afraid.

>> Why don't you shut up

>> and uh let the gentleman finish now?

>> Your sign?

>> Uh-huh.

>> A wise decision, Mr. Gins and one I'm

sure you won't regret. I'm sure I won't

neither.

[screaming]

>> You see, uh, Will was moving out next

week anyway. Tada.

>> [music]

>> Good afternoon, madam.

>> We don't want any today. Thank you.

>> Oh, yes you do, madam. Believe me, you

do.

>> If you wake my husband before he's

finished his lay down, he'll kill you.

>> Not when he knows what I've come for.

>> What have you come for?

>> To give you £100.

£100.

>> Mrs. Mweather. Shh. Whatever for.

>> As you know, these houses are being

pulled down to make way for new blocks

of offices. Now, my firm are very

actress to get started as soon as

possible. Now, all you have to do is to

sign this form here stating that you are

prepared to leave the house within the

month and I shall give you £100.

>> My husband don't want to move. He said

so only the other day.

>> It's not a question of what he wants to

do. It's not a question of what he wants

to do. It's a question of what he's

going to have to do now. We have the law

on our side, Mrs. Mayweather and the

council.

>> Dear put the council man in hospital

last year.

>> Now look, now look, Mrs. Mayweather, I'm

being as nice as I possibly can about

this. He's got a question of what he

wants to do. We got the law on our side.

We'll have to get your husband to see

reason. Otherwise, I'm afraid that I

>> You're what?

>> You're lucky. I'm in a good mood today.

>> So, I'm going to explain something to

you. It is of course

>> we ain't going to move.

>> No. No. Quite a matter.

>> Not for nobody. No. And if you come back

here annoying me and my little misses,

I'LL SPLATTER YOU ALL OVER THAT BALL. DO

YOU UNDERSTAND?

>> YOU'LL make yourself abundant to cla.

>> Come back here again and I'll break your

neck.

What's this?

>> Tea, silly. What do you think it was?

>> I wouldn't say what I thought it was,

but it isn't tea. Warm dish water. More

like.

>> Mine tasted all right.

>> Perhaps you like tepid water. Some

people prefer theirs boiled.

>> It was boiled. You heard the kettle

whistle.

>> Doesn't matter what I heard. It's what I

taste that counts. This water wasn't

boiled.

>> Go and boil your egg.

>> God may forgive you for that, but I

won't. NEVER. NOT IF I LIVE TO BE A 100.

>> But but she's she's lived here 60 years.

She's over 80. It would kill her to

move. She's very frail.

>> Oh, how frail? Well, I mean, uh, one

doesn't like to think of such things,

but how long will a poor old do you

think?

>> Well, it's difficult to say. Her mother,

my gran, live to be 104.

>> 104? 104? That's 24 years. Now, look,

Miss Parish, we're starting on the site

right away. It's very own good, you

know. I mean, all these old houses

around here are going to be torn down.

There'll be bulldozers and dynamite and

and dust. IT'LL BE LIKE THE BLITZ ALL

OVER AGAIN.

>> OH, she loved the Blitz. She was never

happier than when the bombs were

falling. She She'd look out of her

window and she'd shake her fist and and

Miss Parish, if people aren't reasonable

with us, we can take it to the court and

let the judge decide.

>> Oh, dear. I'm sure.

>> Quite right. You are sure that any court

will say that a nice modern flat is

better than a dusty old relic like this?

Let me talk to her.

I'm quite sure I can make her see the

wisdom of it.

>> Oh, we can try.

>> How dare you come with suggestions like

that. NOW GO ON, GET OUT OF MY HOUSE.

GET OUT AND STAY OUT.

>> PARISH. Better mark that one. Dart.

>> How you doing?

>> How am I doing? Would you rather like to

know? I've just been dragged through the

Kremlin backwards and bounced by a

bruiser.

>> Well, I got one signature. A bit of a

struggle, but I finally persuaded him.

>> One? What is the good of one? You've got

to get the last one before you can start

work here. Well, do you know what she

just said? She said the gutters will be

flowing with blood before they leave

here. I think she's right. Don't tell me

you're worried about a few old

scrubbers. You're forgetting there's a

fortune in this deal and half it's

yours. Nearly half. No, Jimmy Boy, it's

all yours. Because I am going back to

the office to dissolve the partnership

before you have to borrow money at 60%,

to repay the money you borrowed at 50%,

to pay back the 40% loan. Said

out yellow legs.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Oh,

I expect you're wondering why I spend

the night here.

I was waiting for you.

What's in the flask?

>> Tea

in your spare drop. Help yourself.

>> I got a throat like an axle.

I've been celebrating

rags to riches in 15 years.

Yeah, that's the truth to know. I

started out buying rags. Did you know

that? My partner reckons I'm going back

again. My ex partner, I should say. He's

walked out and taken his share of the

capital with him.

>> Does that mean you'll be giving up Pit

Street?

Not on your Nelly.

>> Well, if you're that skint, how can you

go on with that great big office

building?

>> Come in.

Don't let high finance battle a girl.

It's dead simple. The secret is in using

other people's money.

The building contractor cuts himself in

for a share of the profits. So he works

for nothing. I sell the office blocks

floor by law in advance. So I've made a

huge profit before I've even got the

foundations in.

>> Oh, that's clever, isn't it?

>> When it comes off.

>> No thanks. I'd rather smack me.

>> Go on, treat yourself. Do you good?

I'll be frank with you.

Unless I can get a work on Pit Street,

I'd have to sell a whole site at a

thumping great loss. Hing it up to my

neck.

[sighs and gasps]

If I'm going to save anything out of

this mess, I'm going to have to get to

work on Pit Street.

Look, you can help me.

>> How?

>> There's 500 quid in it for you.

>> 500

for doing what? Nothing.

>> You told me yourself that nobody gives

you anything for nothing.

>> Practically nothing. All you got to do

is persuade to sit in tennis to sign on

the dotted line by Monday morning.

A thousand. That's my top.

And don't tell me you couldn't do with

it. I bet you ain't got two to scratch

yourself with.

>> You don't understand, do you? We don't

want to move.

>> Then you DON'T UNDERSTAND. SOMEBODY

SOMETIME IS GOING TO GO ahead with a

scheme down there, even if I don't. So

why fight it? So cash in. Do yourself a

bit of good.

>> What good will it do me to sell me

friends? There's one thing that money

can't buy, and that's friends.

No, I reckon we'll just stick where we

are.

>> All right. All right. I'm going to have

to do it the hard way.

Spicy [ __ ]

>> Spice and [ __ ] It

a gym with a wrong number.

>> Hey, you were saying what you was going

to do.

>> Was I? Don't worry about it, Mo. You'll

find out soon enough.

Thanks for the tea.

Hello, that James Ryder. This is Mark

Strang. I've spoken to my associates.

We're prepared to come in with you on

the Pit Street project, but we'd have to

start right away. We don't want our

capital tied up indefinitely. The

contractors are starting on the empty

houses first thing Monday morning. Is

that soon enough?

>> Yes. I'll be frank with you, Ryder. A

little dicky bird told us he had some

trouble down there.

>> A few old bags being difficult. I can

handle them. Don't you worry.

>> I hope so, because if there's any

trouble at all, you can count us out.

Oh, there's the pips. I'll be down first

thing Monday morning.

>> Did I hear voices?

>> I was singing.

And then the supervisor come in and I

have to switch it off.

>> Yes, it's all very interesting, but I

don't see how it helps your situation.

You see, even if you make things

difficult for Mr. Strang and he drops

out, somebody else will step in and buy

it.

>> Yes, we will.

>> What did you say?

>> I said we'll buy it.

>> Whatever for we do with it.

>> Look, if Ryder can get permission to

build offices, we can get permission to

put up two blocks of flats WITH SHOPS

UNDERNEATH. THEY ALL LET [screaming]

LIKE HOT CAKES.

>> BUT WE HAVEN'T GOT the capital.

>> We will have when the pig producers deal

comes through.

>> I'm afraid you don't know what you're

saying.

>> I know exactly what I'm saying.

>> Look, supposing we did buy the area.

That would leave us with not a penny in

the bank. Right.

>> Right.

>> But how are we going to get the money to

put up two blocks of flats? [snorts]

>> I don't know how much you know about

high finances.

>> Not a question of high finance. It's a

question of simple arithmetic. The

secret is to use other people's money.

We cut the contractors in for a share of

the profit so they work for nothing.

Then we let off the flats before even

the foundations is laid. All we've got

to do now is to wait for the pigs to

bring home the bacon.

>> Just a moment.

>> Hello, Colonel Witforth speaking.

>> Rodri here.

>> Oh, hello Rodri. Rodri, I hear you

helped yourself to some of those pig

producer shares. Wise fellow, always

follow them.

>> Wise fellow, have you heard the news?

>> What news?

>> They've gone past.

>> Are you sure?

>> Colonel,

what is it? What's wrong?

>> Swine fever.

>> Not our pigs. They have passed away.

>> All 15,000. Where's our capital then?

>> Gone. All gone.

>> Oh, marvelous. Marvelous. What did I

tell you? I told you we shouldn't risk

our lot on it. There he goes.

>> Oh,

>> listen to me all of you. The colonel

here pointed to the vote and we all

voted. So, it's no good blaming him and

it's no good blaming one another. After

all, it's not as though we saw other

money. It was only writing on bits of

paper.

Somehow it don't seem so important to

me.

But what is important IS WE CAN'T STOP

RIDER PULLING PIT Street down on Monday.

Yeah. Finance.

It's a funny business.

10 minutes ago we had 15,000 pigs.

Now we haven't got am sandwiched between

us.

God.

>> Oh, well that's that then. Let's have a

nice cup of tea.

>> No. You know what? I told you big

business would beat you in the end.

[music]

Wait,

don't tell me they've started on my

place already. I'll tell them a thing or

two.

>> Colonel, what brings you around here?

>> Important news, ladies.

>> Colonel, whatever has happened. Don't

tell me them pigs have come back to life

again.

>> Better than that. This has just come

through on the ticker tape.

>> Large deposit. Valuable minerals found

in Ireland. They discovered the deposit

when they were burying the pigs,

>> causing heavy speculation in pig

producers shares.

>> Yeah. Does this mean we'll get our

capital back?

>> Almost certainly. That did a great deal

more.

>> Pity that to happen too late to save the

street.

>> Maybe it isn't too late. Do you remember

what Mr. Strang said? He said if there

is going to be any trouble I am getting

out.

So we are going to see that he gets

plenty of trouble. Are we [laughter]

candle? You go back and look after that

contraption of yours and leave us to

look after Mr. Ryder and Mr. Stray.

Ladies,

>> shall we take your car or mine?

>> It'll have to be yours, I'm afraid. My

RS is away having a second telephone

installed.

>> Had to sell it, have you? But

this little bus has done me very well

for 17 years. So I don't see the sense

in wasting my brass on Rolls-Royces.

Mind my anvil.

>> Here. Look out. Here comes big head.

>> Hello, lads. This is it.

I've got you again, have I? All right,

lads. These are the ales we're going to

knock down. Starting of course with the

empty ones. Don't want to make any

mistakes about them, do we? E.

[laughter]

6 8 13 15 18 and 22. That's the one in

the end there, right? Come on, lads. Get

the compressor going. Get the gear up,

truck down. Let's scare me. Let's scare

you.

>> I just can't understand it.

From a heartbeat, I'd say she'd live

another 20 years. But I can find

absolutely nothing wrong with her. There

it is. Sometimes these old people know

the best. They know when the time has

come to pass on.

>> How true.

How very true.

She must have absolute quiet, of course.

I'll bring her around something to make

her sleep later on. In the meantime,

give her anything she fancies. Anything

she fancies within reason. A drop of

thin grat.

>> I'm going. I know I'm going.

>> Don't forget absolute

quiet.

Boys,

>> do you hear me?

>> Would you mind explaining what the hell

you think you're trying to do? Do you

realize it? And do you realize there's a

dear old lady dying in that house?

>> Dying?

>> Yes, dying. You've heard a bit, I

suppose.

>> Oh, yeah. Well, if you start up your

damn machinery before she

>> Anyway, if you start it up, I'll have

the authorities on you.

>> Well, I I was only trying to get the

work done. HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF IT

WAS YOUR POOR old mother lying up there

breathing her last

>> poor dear old lady lying there wondering

in her mind

terrified thinking the air raids have

started all over again

>> I don't know what to do

>> I can only suggest one course of action

>> what's that we'll have to have a meeting

won't we right brothers

>> right come let's

Right, brothers. I see we have a quorum.

Now, I needn't prevail upon you to show

your cards. I think we'll go straight

ahead with the uh Would you close in a

little bit, brothers? We have a a spy on

the outside of our little community here

now.

That's Ryder. And look, that must be

strang.

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? WHO'S the foreman?

>> I am the foreman, sir.

>> Why aren't your men working? WHAT? WHY

AREN'T YOUR MEN WORKING? WHAT ARE THE

HELL GOING ON HERE?

>> BE QUIET.

I'll tell you what it's all about.

There's a poor old lady lying in there

sick and dying. And these gentlemen

have kindly agreed to stop work.

>> Kindly agreed to stop.

>> Yeah. And we held a meeting

and this resolution was passed

unanimously.

This meeting seriously deprecates the

derogatory effect on the old lady's elf

and unanimously decides to adjourn work

until status quo reigns.

>> Are you talking about Alana Parish? You

couldn't have a derogatory effect on her

elf if you run over her with a

bulldozer.

>> Don't listen to him.

>> Here's the poor old lady's daughter.

>> How old is your mother, dear?

>> 81.

>> Did you hear that? Did you hear that?

81.

Isn't she entitled to a little peace and

quiet?

Lying there so frail and weak.

>> Frail and weak. SHE WASN'T FRAIL AND

WEAK when I saw her.

>> SHE WENT INTO A RAPID DECLINE. RAPID

DECLINE. H.

>> AH, if she's so sick, she should be in

an hospital.

I'll send an ambulance at my own

expense.

>> She's too weak. She can't be moved.

>> THIS IS A FRAME UP. CAN'T YOU SEE WHAT

SHE'S DOING? SHE'S TRYING TO STOP YOU

PULLING DOWN THE HOUSES.

Have you actually seen the old bird?

>> No. No. I I haven't actually not seen

her.

>> Of course you haven't.

Why don't you ask if you can see her?

After all, it's going to cost your firm

a lot of money when I sue, isn't it?

>> Yes. Well, I mean, like it wouldn't do

any harm, would it? I mean, like just to

have a look.

>> All right, then. Just a look. But

remember, she's unconscious.

>> Well, she's unconscious. The noise can't

be worrying HER.

>> SHE'S UNCONSCIOUS FROM TIME TO TIME.

>> Would you step this way, please?

>> Now, mother, you sure you know what to

do?

>> Of course I know what to do. I've seen

more people snuff it than the rest of

this perishing street put together.

>> I must ask you to keep very, very quiet,

please,

if you'll come this way. Here they come.

[crying and snorts]

[panting]

>> Poor old son.

[gasps]

>> How long you did? She might linger for

days.

There he is. That's him.

I threw him out once and I'll throw him

out again.

Get out of my house, ALL OF YOU. GET

OUT.

Did I step OUT OF MY HOUSE AND I MET IT?

Let's stay out.

>> I'm going. She hasn't even got her hand

in yet.

>> You Stop.

>> See what I mean?

>> What to do now?

>> It's 11:00.

>> She'll either get tired or run out of

ammunition soon.

>> Bringing up the heavy artillery. Eh,

>> you won't get me out of MY HOUSE IN A

MILLION YEARS. Not in a million trillion

years.

Take more than a bulldozer to put that

old battle axe under the ground. Right.

I'll talk to the men.

>> What happened? She wrecked the old

perishing thing. That's what happened.

>> Everything was going fine until she

caught Ser Rider. Then she went start

raving blowing mad.

>> Well, I uh phoned the police. The sight

of a couple of bobbas will knock some

sense into them. Oh, believe me, once

this thing gets rolling, nothing will

stop it. Absolutely nothing.

>> All right, I'll give you till noon.

>> Council of war in my house. Come on.

>> Yeah. Well, I reckon they made proper

Charlie's out of us.

>> Definitely.

>> Well, well, sir, we passed this

resolution.

This meeting deplores the diabolical

liberties taken and applies

non-ratification to the resolution taken

by the previous meeting and declares

that a state a status quo no rains.

>> What the hell does all that mean?

>> What does it mean? It means we go back

to work.

>> Wonderful. Marvelous.

>> After tea break,

>> what they want a tea BREAK FOR? THEY

HAVEN'T DONE anything yet.

>> Haven't done anything. They've been on

the clock since 8. Look, I'll pay them

to work through the tea break. What?

They can't do that. That will be

creating a president.

>> Now, what's the matter?

>> Oh, the men are having a tea break. This

is where I came in. No, not quite. The

men are up in mad. Well, you see, you

see they went they've had their tea. The

women who wish they'd never started

this. That makes two of us.

>> And gone to find the police.

>> Oh, so they've called in the police now,

have they? Well, what can we do? We

can't fight the old Metropolitan Police

Force.

>> Oh, yes, we can if we have to. So, NO

MORE DESPONDENT TALK, if you don't mind.

>> WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE MACHINES? WHAT

ABOUT WHEN THEY START using them?

>> What about it? We'll have to stop them,

won't we? I saw a picture once about the

French resistance. They didn't do so

badly AGAINST THE OLD GERMAN ARMY.

>> THERE'S more than four of them.

>> There'll be more than four of us by the

time I'm finished. Now, Ellie, I want

you to deliver these to all the people

in the street just as quickly as you

can.

>> Do I understand you wish to bring a

charge of assault against poor old Mrs.

Parish?

>> I don't wish to bring a charge against

anybody. I've got some very hard men

working here. I'm warning you there

might be more trouble.

>> Still, sir, I don't see what harm they

could do to a bulldozer.

>> You don't know these old dragons, mate.

>> Now, listen. I'm telling you straight.

If there is any more trouble and there

are no police around, I shall make out a

report and see it gets to the right

quarters.

>> Take this round street quick as you can.

>> Come on, lads. Let's be new. Come along

now, R. Get the compressor started now.

Then want you to get all them plug

stones up to get the bulldozer in.

Don't strain yourself, will you? No.

>> They're not dropping very fast, are

they?

>> You know, the British workman loses

every battle but the last,

>> does he?

>> Come on, girls. Let's get out there and

remember, behave absolutely normal and

don't do nothing illegal. And if you do,

don't get caught. Come on. Morning,

Mrs. CL.

>> Good morning, old morning.

>> Off you go.

>> Rose.

>> Rose,

fancy bumping into you like this. I

haven't seen you in ages.

>> No, it's not since my operation.

>> Excuse me, ladies.

>> Well, now I'll come over queer on the

Wednesday. No, wait, wait. I'm a liar.

It was the Tuesday that Oh, I was poor.

>> Well, I continue to peeky now. I

>> never got over it, you know.

>> You go down there and STOP THAT SHOVEL

THING. GO ON. Right now.

>> You and you go down there and make a nis

of yourself now. Where are those Phelis

got too?

>> Could you tell me where I can find Mr.

Ryder?

>> You have found him.

>> What appears to be the matter, sir.

>> Sanders. Sir, ask those women ladies to

move out of the way of the shovel, will

you?

>> Yes, sir.

Comes the Friday back. I go into

hospital again.

>> Again?

>> Yeah. The ambulance come at 1

>> and at 2 they was getting me ready for

the table.

>> When I saw the I thought would you mind

please?

>> Hello my girl. I thought you've been up

to something.

>> Look at you. So butter won't melt no

mouth.

>> A little further ladies please. Thank

you.

dry.

>> O, get out of it.

>> Well, when they turned me up and I come

around, the doctor told me I was lucky

to be alive to tell the tale.

>> Oh, how awful.

>> Yeah. 5 hours I was laying on that.

>> Now, ladies, I'm afraid you're going to

get hurt if you stay here. Come.

>> Did they ever find out what he was then?

>> Yeah. You all right, son? You don't look

too good.

>> Hey,

>> I said you don't look too good.

>> I ain't. I've just had a diabolical

operation.

>> Well, you ought to be using that thing

here. Quick, come here. Use that.

>> Pick him up. Right. Here we go.

>> Why the hell doesn't he get some help?

>> Mr. Ryder, if you need me, I'll be in my

car.

It's bad enough with that lighter. Don't

you start?

>> Are you all right?

>> What a shame.

>> Get more help.

>> Get on to HQ and tell him to send me

another patrol car right away. Go on.

>> Yes.

>> You haven't had an operation, have you?

>> No, Governor.

>> Thank God for that.

If you don't get that thing started AND

KNOCK SOMETHING DOWN, I SHALL GO START

DRIVING mad

[music]

Somebody's LET ALL ME BLINKING FUEL OUT.

>> Be blue to MP

be

>> now. Ladies, please. We'll move on.

>> Why don't YOU ARREST A LOT OF THEM? HOW

THE HELL CAN I DO THAT? THEY WON'T STAND

STILL LONG ENOUGH TO BE KNOCKED OFF FOR

OBSTRUCTION. BESIDES, WHAT WOULD I PUT

THEM IN? There's about 50 of them at

least.

>> Did you get that mist away?

>> NO, SIR.

>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO, SIR? I DISTINCTLY

WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU GET IT AWAY?

>> WELL, SIR, my aerial dropped off. I

can't understand it.

>> Okay,

there's a telephone box over there.

>> Go and get that messaging and tell them

I WANT TWO BLACK MARIAH AS WELL NOW.

>> YES, SIR.

Do you mind, madam?

>> Do you mind?

>> It's 5 to 12 and I

>> Oh no. Oh no. Something doesn't get

moving. Sony B. COME. YOU'RE GOING BACK

TO BRADFORD.

>> COME ON.

Come on. Please. You can't stay here

now.

Excuse me, man.

Excuse me, man. Thank you.

I'm not interrupting you, Emma.

And I wonder if I can impress upon you

how important it is for me to carry on

with this work. Oh sir, as soon as our

police driver comes back the steaming

net still standing outside the telephone

box.

>> Madam

wait, please.

>> There's a woman in the box, sir.

>> Oh, get her out, man. Get her out.

Excuse me, madam. But

>> excuse me. Now, LOOK, I AM FED UP WITH

YOU POLICEMEN BUSTING IN HERE LIKE THIS.

This is A PUBLIC PHONE BOX, isn't it?

>> I know that, madam. And I am a member of

the public and I am using it, aren't I?

>> I have a very important call, madam.

>> And I HAVE A VERY IMPORTANT CALL AND I

HAVE paid for it and I am making it.

>> Excuse me, Colonel. There's a blue

bottle in the box and it rather put me

off. What was you saying?

>> Saers. Sir, get in that car. Go to the

sus station and tell them if I don't

have two patrol cars and two black Maria

here in 15 minutes, I let the old horse

back on a beat. Yes, sir.

I'm a man of my word, Mr. Ryder. I said

I'd give you till noon, and I will. That

gives you just 3 minutes to knock

something down.

Look what you've done. You

>> murderer.

>> Well, there's no need to go on like

that. He It He was only no wreck. It

couldn't have been worth more than 50

quid.

>> Couldn't have been worth more than Do

you know what you're saying?

I said I'll pay

>> pay. Oh, you'll pay. All right. Don't

you bother. The moment I get back to

Bradford, you'll be hearing from my

solicitors. I'll be suing you for shock,

damages, expenses, default.

[snorts]

I'm the car.

>> Funny how your luck changes, isn't it?

Yes, it is.

I think

there was going to be two blocks of

offices there.

Down there, a fountain

and a gold statue

painted a cross.

And now And now you're thinking of

selling.

>> That's right.

Just a minute. Who the hell are you?

>> Witforth is the name. Colonel Witforth.

Why don't we talk it over at lunch

tomorrow? Suppose you call for me at my

office. 12:00.

>> Ah, this is a pleasure, Mr. Ryder. Won't

you come in? I want you to meet my boy,

>> Mrs. Craig.

You

chars. All of you chars. Do you mind?

>> So that's how you did it.

When I think of that,

you crafty.

>> Now, now, Mr. Ryder, flattery won't get

you nowhere. [laughter]

>> Mr. Ryder, we've decided to invite you

to join the board. I suggest we discuss

the whole matter over a bite of lunch at

the Seavoi.

>> Something terrible's happened.

All right, let's have it.

>> When I told mother we were going to put

her in a nice new flat, she said we

wouldn't get her out of her house. Not

in a million years.

>> Oh, blime me. She can't do that to us.

We're offering her alternative

accommodation.

Oh, well, let's go and have our lunchon

and and then I'll go and butter up the

old watch.

Shall we go?

[music]

[music]

Well, shall we join the ladies?

>> [music]