Original subtitles

Gosh darn it. I just wish I could have the loving relationship I see my parents

having with my stepbrother.

I feel like it would bring us all closer together.

I want nothing more than to play house with my big bro.

I see how mom and dad are. I want somebody I can talk to about anything.

Cuddle with.

Cook with.

Clean with.

Shower with.

And most importantly, start a big family with.

I want at least three sons and two daughters.

But I need someone fit.

Someone that's naturally good at sports.

Because then why would I even want kids in the first place?

I need to figure out how to tell my bro that I want to play house.

Yeah?

Can I shut this?

Sure.

You good?

I feel like I've been holding a lot in recently.

Okay, about what?

I don't want you to, like, get weird about it.

Get weird about it? Yeah, because you're, like, my stepbrother.

Okay, and you're my little sister. I mean, like, I'm here for you. I care

about you. I mean, you can talk to me about whatever.

Are you sure?

I mean...

It's not like you're going to say you're about to, like, run away or something,

right? Mm-mm.

Okay. No, I don't want to run away.

Oh, okay.

You got me real worried. I thought you were just, like, up and going or

something.

No. I thought you were about to, like, write a eulogy. Look, I know I've been,

like, a little, like, irritated recently, but, like, I don't want to run

away. Okay.

So what's going on?

So I've been thinking, like, the past few weeks, you know, you know how mom

and dad are, like, you know, just, like, super, like, lovey-dovey.

Like, they're just so loving to each other. And, like, they, like, they cook

together, they clean together.

You know, they just, they're so loving to each other.

Right.

Well, I... Yeah, they're our parents. I mean, they're together. Like, why

wouldn't they be? If not, then they should just be divorced and be done with

it, you know?

Well, yeah.

At least they're happy.

I guess, yeah, it's a healthy marriage.

Yeah. Um, but... What?

I've... It's been making me feel... pretty lonely.

Feel lonely? Why?

Because, like, I don't know. I wish I had someone that I could play house with

like that.

I mean, you know, they don't really just, like, play house. They're, like,

living it, you know?

But, I don't know. I'm sure, like, one day, like, the right guy will come along

and stuff.

What?

You're being weird.

Obviously, I don't want, like, to play house with some random guy, or else I

wouldn't even be telling you that.

Okay, well, what, you got a thing for, like, one of my friends or something?

No.

See, I... You're so clueless.

I don't know what you're trying to get at.

Obviously, I wanted to, like, play house with my big bro.

Wait, me?

No, the wall.

Why me?

I don't get it.

Because, like, I don't know, I just, I think it would be fun.

You know, I think it would bring us closer together.

You don't think we're closer or anything already?

I mean, I feel like we could get closer.

I mean, yeah, I care about you.

I mean, like, I'll cook and clean with you if that's what you want.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, so you just want me to cook and clean with you?

Yeah, or we could, like, wash each other and, like, um,

hmm.

Watch movies.

Mm-hmm.

Go out together.

Yeah.

Go out and do things. Yeah, like, do stuff together.

Here, why don't you wait on me and, like, actually, like, talk to me about

this. So, like, what has you, like, feeling like this, I guess?

Maybe my hormones.

Your hormones?

I mean, like, I don't think it's, like, weird or anything.

Like, I get it. Like, I'm your big bro.

Like, you see me as, like, the man in your life or whatever.

Yeah.

And, like, I don't know. Dudes are douchebags, so I can see why it would be

me, but... I don't know. It just... That's a big step for you, you know?

Because, like, the whole house thing entails...

Other things?

Um, what?

What do you mean, what?

What do you mean, entails other things?

Why are you touching yourself?

I'm not touching myself.

I didn't touch my balls.

Okay, but it entails other things.

Like what?

Look, I don't want to make things weird or whatever, but, like, if you actually

want to, like, play house with me, you know, you have to...

take it a step further so we're not just playing house anymore.

You want more than house?

Well, it's not just, like, house. It's basically, like, living together.

I mean, house, you think mom and dad lasted this long. You think mom's just,

like, giving him a... Definitely not fucking

staying together for ten years only doing, you know?

Jerking him off?

Well, she doesn't just do that. She's like... Do you watch mom and dad have

sex? No, I don't watch them. You're such a pervert.

Stop. I don't watch them have sex. I just... I'm older than you, so I know

these things.

Mom's obviously putting out with dad.

That's how they had us, you know? And you want me to put out to you?

Well, if you want to put house.

Or, like, make it a real thing, you know?

Is this conversation turning you on?

I think it's not really, like, turning me on, but, like, kind of, because,

like, I want to take care of you, and, like,

that would be ideal.

It's not like I have to go through the whole, like, hoops with a different

girl, you know?

It's like you. Like, I'm comfortable with you, and, like, I care about you,

you know?

You're my little sister.

Aww.

What?

You're such a good big brother to me.

So... I don't know.

Just touch it.

See how it feels.

You want me to touch it? Yeah.

I'm scared.

Yeah.

Touch it.

You know how I'm your big brother?

Yeah. It's your little brother.

Aww.

Yeah.

I wouldn't say little.

Yeah.

You don't see it?

It's my baby brother.

Yeah. You don't see it?

Uh, yeah, kind of. Kind of, yeah.

Is that in the cradle anymore?

Yeah, oh, he's so cute

It's

bigger than I thought He

smells good

yeah

That's why dad's always happy.

Mm-hmm

I've thought about this, big bro.

Have you? Yeah.

What, sucking it? Yeah.

What do you think?

I drew a picture.

Did you do it?

Yes.

Do you want to see it?

Sure. Can I go grab it real quick?

Yeah, you can go grab it.

You have to see this.

Okay.

Let's see your artistic skills.

Mm-hmm.

This is me and you.

That's me and you?

Mm-hmm.

Wait, you drew that?

Yep. And then, this is me and you.

Oh, my God.

It's just like how I pictured it.

Is that you barking at me? Mm-hmm.

Aw, let's hear it.

Okay, don't be shy. Just bark at me. Come on.

Aw,

you do care about me.

You draw us a lot. Yeah. Yeah? Mm-hmm. Here.

Aw,

you're so cute.

Mm-hmm.

I look even cuter with my big bro's cock in my mouth.

Don't be

weird. I'm not being weird. We're playing

house.

Mmm.

Thanks for being cool with this.

You're the best.

It's like you read my mind.

Yeah.

You must really care about me huh

Does that feel good, bro? Yeah. Yeah?

Yeah.

I'm surprised.

You'd never guess who taught me.

I don't think I wanna know.

Now you can't tell anyone about this, right? I know.

Swear? I swear.

Okay, just so you're sure. Because Dad would be pissed.

He would be mad.

Yeah. So would Mom.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I usually let Dad play with me, but he hasn't been doing it enough.

Yeah.

I haven't felt loved by him.

Well, good thing I'm here.

Uh-huh.

So, um... You wanna take things to the next step?

What do you mean?

Well, you can't just get blowjobs and call it a day. What? Why?

Because that's not what playing house is all about.

Um...

Do you want me to, like, take my clothes off?

That's a start.

Can I be comfortable with you?

Like everything?

Yeah, everything.

What are you, too chicken?

No, I'm not a chicken.

Okay, well... I can trust you.

I'm getting there.

What? I said damn, you've grown up too.

Grown up?

Yeah.

Yeah, I know it's been a while since you've seen me like this.

So,

what do you want me to do?

Do you want me to sit on it?

This? No, face it. Face you?

No, face it. Okay.

It feels really big.

It's stretching you, right? Yeah.

You're so comfortable.

Sit all the way down.

Oh, it's a lot to take in.

Yeah. Yeah.

It might be like that at first.

Yeah.

Slowly work it all the way.

Oh. I can feel you in my insides.

It's like squeezing you.

It's like all the way in there.

Yeah. Oh my god, I can tell what you ate for lunch today.

What did I eat?

Gummy bears.

You know me so well.

You know, you're really tight.

Yeah.

I've only had sex with Daddy.

It's been a while.

Didn't need to know that one.

Makes me jealous.

Oh, my God.

It feels like an unopened paint can.

An unopened what?

Paint can.

Paint can?

Paint can. Paint can. Yeah.

That's how tight it is.

Have you done stuff with a paint can? No.

How do you know that, then?

I've helped my buddies paint walls before.

Have you thought about fucking your little sister?

All the time? Yeah.

Especially when you wear those little short shorts around the house?

Yeah.

Those tank tops? Oh, my God.

It's like they're staring at me.

Mm-hmm.

You know, I've actually seen you get hard.

Wait, what? When? Yeah, when I'm, like, just sitting in the kitchen eating

popsicles and you're staring at me.

The way you suck them, it's like, I can't help but imagine.

Yeah.

They're just so good.

Well, whenever you want to popsicle, you can just come to me now. Okay.

Your big bro can give you a sweet treat.

Yeah.

This is a good sweet treat.

I can't believe we're actually doing this. I can't believe we are either.

Does that feel good?

Yeah.

I can feel it stretching me out.

Yeah.

Yeah You can cuddle on the couch and touch each other Yeah

Yeah, I think you hit the back of my vagina.

Did I? Yeah.

Oh, wow.

Oh,

shit.

I bet it looks so good just going in and out.

Yeah, I love that too.

I think I like playing house.

Yeah, you like this?

We can do it every day.

My little brother deserves some hugs, too

Yeah.

Yeah.

Uh huh.

I bet other siblings would.

Thank you.

can watch it go in and out.

Okay, so what are you saying?

means, right? That's a lot of responsibility.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, so he doesn't tell on us.

Yeah, I don't know about that.

Oh, fuck.

I put like five in there.

Oh, fuck.

Well, that's a good thing. I wanted three boys and two girls. I'm going to

make you a fucking ophthalmologist.

Oh, fuck.

Holy fuck.

Fucking pee.

Fucking Malcolm.

our fucking mom. Yeah.

Holy shit.

God, I'm gonna be a dad.

Yeah. I'm gonna be a dad.

Oh my god.

Oh, I think I'm gonna cry.

Alright,

well, we can't tell mom and dad about this, but we can keep working on the

fucking baby thing, okay? Yeah.

Okay.

Let's go get cleaned up.