All language subtitles for Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman S01e08 The Great American Medicine Show-2

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Original subtitles

Khaleed?

Hey, Mom, did you see him? What are you all doing here? We came to see the show.

We called you. I guess you didn't hear us. I was busy.

What kind of show is this?

Well, if you'd be quiet, you might find out.

Come on! Come on!

Now, don't you be shy.

medicine show now now now now the big show is on saturday

but what we got here for you fine folks this afternoon is a little preview

that's sheba

Ma, look.

Chief Blackhead.

That's not Chief Blackhead. The one,

the only, Doc Eli!

Good afternoon.

My name is Dr.

Elias Jackson.

But y'all might as well call me Doc Eli. Everybody does.

This is my Kickapoo Indian friend, Sick No More.

to testify to the authenticity of our age-old Indian formula.

Chief? Kickapoo Indian sagwa.

Good medicine.

This ancient tribal remedy will cure any and all illness proceeding from impure

blood. Now, that includes torpid liver, brain fever, paling cheeks, and wasting

manhood. All that and more for a mere $1 a bottle.

Now, I know what you're gonna say because I know what you're thinking.

Well...

Fine, but we got us a town doctor.

What do we need with this Doc Eli's Kickapoo Indian Sagwa?

Well, my friend, is your doctor one of those fellas that uses a whole lot of

big words when he's talking to you?

Does he tell you all what's wrong with you in one breath and want to go to

cutting on you the next?

I'm just here to offer you an alternative, a free choice, so to speak.

Because Doc Eli's Kickapoo Indian Sagwa...

We'll cure what ails you or your money back, and that's guaranteed.

I wonder what them show folks are doing.

Or do they have a guy who swallows swords?

I imagine he has to swallow some of Doc Eli's medicine first.

I heard Mr. Bray say he was gonna sell that stuff in his store.

That fella's not a real doctor.

Not like Dr. Mike.

That's all right, Colleen. Really.

It's just a performance.

Everybody knows it's just for fun.

That guy can't really cure anybody, can he?

Colleen! What happened?

He got in a fight with a bobcat.

You gonna be all right?

Well, I'm not a veterinarian, but I'll do the best I can.

I know you will.

Yes, sir. Franklin here is probably the smartest engine that you will ever meet

in your entire life.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, yeah.

How smart is he?

I want my money back!

Your girl's no good.

Your problem with the hospitality?

Yeah, yeah.

I ain't getting any. She says she's sick.

I am.

Go on back in there.

I'll get you somebody nice.

Go on now.

What's this crap?

Hey, I'm giving you the gospel now. I ain't feeling right.

You're gonna be feeling worse if you don't get back in there.

Excuse me, son. I couldn't help over here.

Ma'am, I want you to please accept this.

A bottle of my very own Kickapoo Indian prairie plant extract. It's made up

special for those delicate female complaints.

Let me see.

Your health, ma'am.

Now, drink this stuff.

You'll be fine.

I want to see Dr. Mike.

She costs money.

You got a doc right here nice enough to give you a free cure.

Now, drink it.

Buck says he won't do it.

Oh, he'll do it all right, won't you, Chief? He'll do it.

I'm on the Chief.

Why, shucks, this ain't nothing.

Chief Franklin here once dove off to Niagara Falls in that snow, Chief. Up

you go.

Get ready to pay up, boys.

I'd like to keep him overnight. Why don't you check back tomorrow?

Okay, I'll stay close by.

Now, this brave Indian is going to execute a perfect back somersault

into this barrel of water, aided only by his Kickapoo Indian medicine, which

protects him from any ill effects owing to such a dangerous, dangerous endeavor.

That's the snake oil salesman I was telling you about.

Chief Franklin.

Are you ready on the count of three?

One.

Boys, you better get back here.

Let me get a splash.

One.

Not one talented engine, and did I not tell you so?

That's why you've got to believe me when I tell you my product is the absolute

finest on the market.

Easy.

Come on, pay your bets, fellas.

Let's settle up inside, boys. Drinks are on me.

You a Cheyenne?

No. What are you then?

Not anything.

Oh.

Is that your pa?

Yeah.

My mom's a doc.

She'll take care of him.

He's just drunk. There's no cure for that.

That was a real good trick you did.

You in the wrestling show too?

Sometimes.

What do you do?

Just hold the bottles up.

But now I can do that.

My friend in cloud dancing taught me the stick ball game.

You want to play?

I don't know how.

I'll teach you sometime if you want.

What kind of scars are those?

That's from the Sundance.

Must be soup.

Oh, Cheyenne.

Kickapoo.

Kickapoo?

Isn't that an eastern tribe? Yeah, most people make fun of the name.

I'll see you later.

Horace, are you all right?

I got this friend.

A friend, uh-huh.

And this friend ain't feeling so well.

What seems to be his problem?

Her.

Her problem.

It's a she.

I think it's a female thing.

Myra?

Could you call on her tomorrow?

It'd mean an awful lot to me.

Of course, I'll pay you for it.

No, no, that's quite all right. Please, I want you to take it.

I'll check on her first thing in the morning.

Thank you.

It'd mean an awful lot to me.

Dr. Quinn.

If you've come to try and sell me some of your medicine, you're wasting your

time. No, ma'am. No, I'm just looking for my engine. Your alien?

They said you had him. Here.

That's an interesting clientele you got here, doctor. I help all living

creatures that need it.

Come on. Franklin, rise and shine.

Leave him alone. Can't you see he's in no condition?

You got another show to do.

He almost drowned in that last little show of yours.

How much you get, Eli?

He needs treatment.

I know just what to do for him.

And what might that be?

Give him a dose of your patent concoction? Not that it's any of your

business, ma'am, but I'm not just joking here about being a doctor. I truly am

one. Johns Hopkins, 48.

I beg your pardon, sir, but I find that rather difficult to believe.

You're welcome to verify.

I might just do that.

Now, what about yourself?

Your alma mater, ma'am?

Women's Medical College of Pennsylvania, class of 60.

Well, that concoction, as you put it, happens to be a scientifically tested

formula that has helped a great many people, including old Franklin here.

It masks symptoms, delays treatment. It doesn't help people. It hurts them

badly. Oh, you're telling me you have a cure for TB, cholera, cancer?

You know as well as I do that medicine is mostly just helping people to feel

better. Now, if I give them something that provides comfort and hope...

Come on. On your feet.

To see them through their darkest days, how can you call that wrong?

It's false hope and false advertising. It isn't a cure.

Well, they believe it is, and that's what's important.

And whose methods cause more pain and suffering, yours or mine?

Whose methods heal more?

It's our obligation as physicians to cure people, not simply to conceal their

symptoms.

I don't lie to my patients to make them feel better.

I do everything in my power... to save their lives.

Can you say the same thing, Doctor?

Mara? Oh, Mike.

Here.

Oh,

no. Oh,

you're so sweet to me.

You're the only one I can tell.

How? I mean, are you sure?

Uh-huh.

When I first started working for Hank in Denver, it happened to one of the girls

there. Then I got all the same signs she had.

Myra, you're going to have a baby.

A baby.

Sometimes I wonder would it be like to have one of my own.

Yeah.

Look, don't tell nobody, okay?

I just couldn't bear it if people talked.

Myra, people are gonna figure it out sooner or later.

What's ours gonna think of me?

And Hank?

Hank will probably throw me out if you don't kill me first.

You gotta help me tell him, Dr. Mike.

Promise me you'll be here when I tell him.

There's liable to be a scene.

I promise.

We'll figure this all out. Now, why don't you lie down?

Relax.

Let me take a little chill.

Time's up.

Get out.

I was just about to examine her.

Come by the clinic, Myra, as soon as you can. I need to give you a proper

examination.

I will.

Thank you.

Oh,

Dr. Mike.

How's Myra?

Oh, I just came from seeing her, and I believe that she's fine.

Oh, then there's nothing wrong.

Well, not exactly.

Well, I don't understand.

Well, it's just that as Myra's physician, I'm not allowed to discuss

her condition with you.

She has a condition?

Oh, Lord.

No, no, Horace.

It's similar to when you send telegrams.

You know what they say, but you wouldn't tell anyone else now, would you? Oh, no,

ma'am. That would violate a sacred trust between a telegraph operator and a

customer. Exactly.

Well, it's the same thing between a doctor and a patient.

But we can go see Mara together.

I haven't completed her examination yet, but I'm sure she has something she wants

to tell you.

But for right now, I want to send a wire to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore.

To, uh, Mr. John Hopkins? No, no, uh, Johns Hopkins.

Oh, there's two of these fellas?

No, it's a university, a medical school specifically.

I want to find out if Doc Eli's degree is as phony as his cures.

Your what?

How the hell did that happen?

You know.

I know how it happened. I want to know why.

Been in this business long enough to know better, Myra.

I'm sorry.

It's not her fault.

Stay out of this. I won't.

Now, see? You made her cry. I didn't make her do nothing.

That's what working girls in her situation do. They cry because they're

worthless. And I haven't had enough of it! Stop it now, both of you. You're not

helping. Oh, and I suppose you are.

What am I supposed to do with her now? She's in the family way, except without

the family. That kind of thing's off-putting to most customers.

You even know who it was?

Me.

It was me.

Horace. Horace? That's right.

The baby's mine.

I knew there was more going

on in here than just talk.

You're gonna pay for this.

You hear me?

How you feeling?

I'm fine.

Boy,

go on inside.

What do you want?

I want to know who you are.

Told you.

You're Cheyenne, aren't you?

Where'd you do the Sundance?

Who says I did?

Those scars say you did.

You saw the scars?

You see the scars on the inside your people Vejo gave me?

Gave my son?

I may be a white man, Vejo, but my spirit goes with the Cheyenne. The

Cheyenne.

Trapped on a reservation.

Have to beg Vejo for Sundance. Have to beg Vejo for food.

I don't beg for nothing.

I live free.

You call this free?

You're not free. You're just as trapped as you were on the reservation.

Nobody pay me for being Cheyenne. They pay me for being Kickapoo.

Kickapoo, I stay.

What about your boy here?

Doesn't he get to choose his own way? You're taking away his heritage, his

people. His people!

My people are dead.

Join the dog soldiers.

They're no tribe. They're outcasts. Just like you?

The dog soldiers are warriors. They're fighting to save what's left.

You could join them.

You could make a difference.

You make difference.

I make money.

It's a medicine bag from the dog soldiers. They want you to have it.

Take it.

This is my medicine now.

It's me.

Horace, what are you doing?

I had to see you.

But if I'm upsetting you, I can... Oh, no.

It's just so romantic.

It's like that story, Romeo and Juliet.

I don't know that one. You'll have to tell it to me sometime.

You all right?

Fine. Uh-huh.

Are you all right?

Huh?

Myra?

Yes, Horace?

What I said the other day, I... I meant it.

I wish I was the father of your baby.

That's why I was wondering... I was just thinking...

Hoping... Maybe you'd want to marry

me sometime?

Never mind. What a stupid question. I don't know what I was thinking.

I told myself, Horace... Yes.

What?

I said yes.

I would be honored to marry you, Horace. Myra.

Myra.

Out of my way.

Where are you going with her?

Please, Mom.

Can we at least go to the show?

I don't think that's such a good idea.

Please.

I promise we won't drink any of that solid stuff.

We'll see.

Horace? Dr. Mike.

Dr. Mike. She's real bad.

Bring her in here.

On the table.

What happened? I don't know. She just fainted.

She never came for her examination this morning. I should have known. Hank

wouldn't have let her.

Morris, could you wait outside?

Horace, Myra's not expecting.

She wanted me to tell you.

What do you mean?

It's not a baby.

She has a growth tumor on her ovary.

What does that mean?

It means she needs an operation.

Is she gonna die?

Dr. Jackson.

Johns Hopkins confirmed your degree.

Well, as you've discovered, I'm not much of a liar. That's why I decided to make

my living as a salesman.

You graduated top of your class, specializing in surgery.

So my fair share of the operating room.

Did you ever attempt an ovariotomy?

Never attempted any.

Performed several dozen.

Well, I have a patient who's desperately in need of that procedure, and I've only

assisted in a few, but to someone of your experience... Give her this.

Stop it.

I've had enough of that act of yours.

I want you to perform the surgery.

No.

Please, Dr. Jackson, I need your help.

What do I have to say to make you understand?

You know.

The chances of her surviving the surgery.

But we have to try.

I don't have to do anything.

Except run a medicine show.

Now, if you will excuse me.

Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to come here and ask you to do this?

You want to talk about hard?

Then let's talk about Gettysburg, Doctor.

fredericksburg what's that got to do with this everything it wasn't a sight

so much i could block them out most of them just closing my eyes but the

sounds the moans of boys who were unlucky enough to have made it

through the battle the death rattles the ones who were too broken to fix that's

enough boys

Calling for their mamas.

Nurses singing.

Soldiers screaming while I sawed off their limbs.

That's enough.

I'm just trying to tell you I can't do it anymore. I can't hold a knife.

I can't do it.

the only Doc Eli!

Ladies and gentlemen, you sure are a fine-looking group of folks today.

Welcome to the one and only Doc Eli's Kickapoo Medicine Show, designed to

entertain and delight you or your money back.

What's that you say?

The show is free. Well, I guess you get what you pay for.

and this here is my kickapoo indian friend sick no more and his papoose

little sick no more to tell you a little bit about our newest product chief

kickapoo indian worm killer is

kickapoo

indian worm killer

And little sick no more can tell you the straight of it just as well.

Can't you, son? Go ahead now.

Strong medicine for stomach upset.

Strong medicine for stomach upset.

Ha-ha.

Bathsheba.

Record we get what you pay for.

We just want to talk.

We just want to talk.

This is cloud dancing.

The friends I was telling you about.

I hope.

It is time you and your son to come home.

Spirits have told me.

They haven't told me.

Listening to the wrong spirits.

You're not my brother.

We're both Cheyenne.

My band was slaughtered.

You weren't.

I should have been.

I was...

hunting with my son.

When we came back, our village was a river of blood.

It's a lot.

Ann.

Wouldn't you all rather be at the show?

I'm right where I want to be.

That is, if you want me here.

I do.

Myra.

You want me to explain about the surgery?

Yeah.

I want to know what's going to happen.

I'm going to have to make an incision in your abdomen, your stomach, to take the

tumor from your ovary.

I'll try to be quick so that I can minimize the loss of blood, but there

could be an infection.

And the tumor could be too far gone.

Sounds real serious.

Like I might not wake up.

If I don't have that operation, I'll surely die, right?

I'm afraid so.

Well, not much of a choice.

No.

There's also a chance that everything will be just fine.

When am I getting my girl back?

Maybe never.

What do you mean by that?

She ain't pregnant.

She's got a tumor.

Dr. Mike's got to operate on her.

No way I'm letting that butcher cut her open.

Now, I gave her that patent medicine, and it says it cures all female

problems. She's my property, and I ain't letting her get cut.

She's having the operation, and that's that.

Listen up, lover boy.

Myra belongs to me.

I got a contract that says so when I say she takes the medicine. Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

What are you gonna do about it?

Nothing.

Except this.

She already got the medicine.

What was

that? You heard.

There ain't no other cure.

Dr. Jackson, stop this. Tell him. Tell him she needs surgery.

All right, hold on. Hold on!

She's right. The doc is right.

My medicine can't help her case.

It's different, you see.

She needs that operation.

And she needs Dr.

Quinn here to do it.

If you want her, you can have her.

Only a damn fool falls in love with a whore.

Thank you.

Bye, Brian.

Hey, sorry I didn't get to teach you the stickball game.

I'll teach him.

Franklin, you want to tell me how I'm supposed to run a Kickapoo Indian

medicine show with no Kickapoo Indian?

I'm no such thing.

Dr. Jackson?

Nobody here by that name.

You ought to check your hearing, Doctor.

I'm not receiving visitors at this time.

No, you're sitting here feeling sorry for yourself.

You're not the only surgeon to serve in the Civil War.

My fiancé also served.

Only he didn't come back alive, but you did.

I know that what you experienced was horrible.

And I pray that things like that will never happen again.

Life is too precious.

But Myra's life is also too precious to let slip away just because you're angry

with the world.

I'm not angry.

Please.

She needs... No, I need your help.

Afraid.

You look about as bad as I feel.

I'm almost ready to begin.

Can you hold on just a little longer for me?

Any word from Doc Eli?

Ira?

I want you to know...

I still want to marry you.

Oh, Horace.

You're going to have us a big church wedding with a reverend and flowers.

What kind do you like?

Daisies.

Daisies it is.

Caught him on the porch like this.

What are you doing here?

Uh, surgery.

I'm the surgeon, remember?

You're drunk.

That's an excellent diagnosis, doctor.

I'm ready to operate.

No, you're not.

But you will be.

Sully, sober him up.

This is gonna take a while.

You don't have to drown me.

Doctor, ready to open?

Look at that.

It won't stop shaking.

It's cold in here, do you?

Don't worry.

You can do it.

I can't.

You sure?

The best thing I can do is talk you through it.

Come on around here.

Make the incision transverse, lower abdominal wall.

Closer. Come in, come in, come in, come in. Yes, right there. Go ahead.

Easy.

What do you want?

Just passing by.

She owes me, Horace.

Got a year left on her contract yet.

I'm gonna buy out her contract.

You ain't got the money.

Horse, sit down. Shut up.

Both of you.

She's going to be fine.

Horace.

Dr.

Clint?

Dr. Mike?

I'm right here, Myra.

You made it through the surgery just fine.

You're gonna be all right.

You hear that, Myra?

I sure do.

I told you we'd be together.

Always.

You deserve better than me, Horace.

As soon as I pay off that contract, we're gonna have us that church wedding.

That might take forever.

I can wait forever.

How's our patient?

Recovering nicely, thank you. Golly, that was a mighty fine cut.

Your fiancée would be awfully proud of you.

You could stay.

You're a fine surgeon, Dr. Jackson.

You could teach me a lot.

Well, you taught me something about myself.

And I thank you for that.

But... You've got a medicine show to run.

Here's a little something to remember me by.

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