Original subtitles

(upbeat music)

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(dramatic music)

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- Man, that's a lot of drugs. - Yeah.

Have you ever seen so many drugs?

Once.

That is a shit ton of drugs.

I can't begin to do the math.

The measuring ounces and kilos. Wow.

Where the hell you think they get it all?

Yeah.

- Stick of gum? - Sure.

And I don't mean to keep harping about it,

but it's a goddamn hell of a lot of drugs.

Not ours. Just guarding it.

That's not to think about it.

Yeah, no, one can think, man.

(indistinct) Keep the whole city high, man.

Do your job.

What's that?

(dramatic music) (Drug Dealer screaming)

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music continues)

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I like the views.

Yeah, you new to LA?

Yeah, I just got transferred here for work.

It's easy to forget what a mountainous city this is

lots of hills.

This isn't an amazing neighborhood, but it's fine.

On a real good day you can see the ocean.

(footsteps tapping)

- Wow. - So the building

is about 34 years old

but we had a major renovation about 10 years ago.

So the kitchen is that old, except the fridge

was after like two tenants ago, it's fine For what it is.

One bedroom, good, solid room. It's quite large.

I like it.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

What was that?

- Building cat. - Hmm.

You said you got transferred?

Oh, yeah, a new office with the same company.

Yeah, I work in oil and natural gas.

That sounds interesting.

Oh, well kind of.

My job's to read reports and then

well make reports if we should dig for oil.

- Neat. - Yeah.

It's interesting business

'cause it's, it's like not a sure thing, you know?

Yeah, I'm a screenwriter.

Building management helps pay the bills.

[Dana] Anything I've heard of?

I work mostly on kids shows, anyways.

2,600 a month, first and last month

you get the parking space.

Pool is in the back, not huge

but really nice in the summer.

There's a weight room too.

I, I'm not that big into fitness, but you look fit.

[Dana] Ugh, I do my best.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Um, oh, interested?

What are you doing?

Oh, that's just the building cat

well, neighborhood cat, I suppose.

She kinda just goes around the building.

Wait, what?

Ah, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I suppose you can pet her if you want, no law against it.

She's very friendly.

Yeah. This is very clearly a woman in a catsuit.

Well that may be true, but it is a free country.

Wait, do you have kids? No.

We are about half a block around

from a great magnet school, junior high for the arts.

Great place, but you're probably not interested.

Famous local library though, right next to it.

(car engine revving) (Dana speaking indistinctly)

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

200 bucks off your rent for the first year.

Yeah Mom, it was a bust, nice location

but weird vibes. (car door creaking)

[Mother] What do you mean, darling?

Aah, hmm. Smells normal. (door slamming)

[Mother] What?

Ah, nothing.

[Mother] I worry about you darling. Alone in the big city.

You were never very great at making friends.

I just need you to find a place and settle it.

Yeah, yeah.

Well they're willing to make some space in the rent,

but I'm just not, yeah, I'm just not sure.

Talk to you later. Yeah.

(traffic buzzing)

(car engine revving)

(glass thudding)

- Hey, new here? - Hey, ah, yeah.

Welcome to the building.

I'm Max Power. (tongue clicking)

Well, that was short.

Outta the Max.

Oh good. Nice meeting you Max.

Do you need help carrying anything?

Ugh, Max Power takes what they want, wants what they take.

Hey, nice place. Hmm.

You know, after I transitioned I wanted a clean sweep.

So moved down here from Portland.

Yeah, sounds neat, yeah,

I left Denver. Wow.

(Dana sighing) Well who's that?

Oh what her? She's harmless.

Is she like a homeless person or something?

I, I don't think that's what we call, you know,

it's none of my business really.

She leaves me alone, so we cool.

Whoa. (Lori imitating cat meowing)

I'm so sorry, I hope there's nothing um-

- No, I think it's just clothes.

Okay, good.

(upbeat music)

So this is gonna be your cubicle.

Sorry, we just got this building

it's a little sketchy, but it is what it is.

Um, where are my coworkers?

TBD, T-B-D, we're working on that.

Frankly, when we opened this location,

we had a company wide pool to get people out here.

But you were the only one that said yes.

Me? (upbeat music continues)

Cost of living, LA's expensive.

Yeah.

I will see you around

and I'll come back with some paperwork for that computer.

Okay, right, thank you. (upbeat music continues)

Listen up people,

I know some of you are new to this organization

and I know some of you have come from other organizations.

And some of you think you're hot fucking shit.

But let me tell you something, you don't know squat.

Some of you don't know oil from olive oil, coal from candy.

You got it?

As far as I'm concerned

you're just babes in the fire until you prove yourself.

Until you prove you got it by the balls, the big cojones.

Let me tell you one thing, I'm an asshole.

Lemme tell you two things.

Half of you are not gonna be here next year

and that's okay with me, because that just means

there's more power and more money for the rest of us.

And make no mistake about it, oil is power.

Kingdoms have been made, over oil.

Wars have been fucked, over oil.

It is pure power in its purest form.

And we are going to get it. We are going to get it.

(upbeat music continues)

You, Henderson, isn't it?

Sometimes you look at someone and see yourself

and think, is he gonna be me in 20 years?

Sometimes you're right.

Sometimes you're just doing dishes.

What's it gonna be, Henderson?

Now the rest of you, I wanna hear a big chant

a big primal cry, a hoorah.

I can't hear you.

(upbeat music continues)

Now that's more like it.

Now the rest of you go find me some freaking oil.

(upbeat music continues)

Here's the computer password. You know how to work it.

You need anything else, just contact me.

(upbeat music continues)

(Dana slurping)

Oh. (Dana breathing heavily)

Great. (Dana breathing heavily)

(door creaking) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Lady, I'm, I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry, but can you leave please?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I, I guess the building super doesn't wanna send you away

and I get it, I get it.

But I am just trying to relax after a long day

and this ain't happen.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I'm sorry. (Lori imitating cat meowing)

I'm sorry, God, please leave.

No, no, no, no, no.

Please, no, wait, no, no, no, wait, no, no, no, please.

Please, I don't wanna have to call the police.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

No, no, wait, wait, no, no, no, no, wait, no.

Oh, I'm just one hoggy-doggy now.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(upbeat music)

Police have confirmed that a major drug shipment

was captured in a warehouse in South Los Angeles last night.

There are reports that-

- [Narrator] Built, bear, tough.

(upbeat music) (knuckles rapping)

What is it? Go away.

- Expert X. - What?

- I have a delivery for you. - I didn't order anything.

I can leave it on the porch if you want

but it's ice cream.

(door creaking) (upbeat music continues)

Here's your chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, butter pecan.

What is this?

Peach, peach Haagen-Dazs ice cream

chocolate, butter scotch.

Oh, that must be toffee and a banana singular.

That's on the list. Thank you.

Ah, is this a tip big situation?

(upbeat music continues)

Well, I'm not gonna object.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(upbeat music continues) (Lori groaning)

(upbeat music continues)

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Mm, probably should have tipped more for $150.

(Dana breathing heavily)

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(upbeat music continues)

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This is nice.

Ignore me.

Will do. (upbeat music continues)

So this is what it's always like.

It's a multifaceted city. Got a lot of stuff going on.

- Mm, I suppose. - Okay, the important thing is

you gotta be chill to the max.

Hey.

I think he told me he was a cardiologist.

[Yogi] Ain't no promise.

(upbeat music continues)

Would you like some milk?

Saucer, saucer.

All right (indistinct) saucer.

(upbeat music continues)

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(Dana groaning)

(Dana breathing heavily) (Lori slurping)

(Lori groaning)

I don't know, um, do you have a collar?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

What am I saying?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I'm just, I'm just not having a great time.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

This city is fucking nuts.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

My job is nuts, my life is, it's fucking nuts.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I don't know anyone here.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I left all my friends.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

God, my life is so weird.

(Lori groaning)

You're like the thing that makes the most sense.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(Lori imitating cat meowing continues)

(Lori imitating cat meowing continues)

What the fuck am I doing?

Stay out.

(door slamming) (upbeat music)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

Oh, oh, God, no.

(upbeat music continues)

Oh, God, no.

[Operator] Makes friends.

Yeah I don't know I, I don't know

who I talked to last time.

Yeah, I, I had a cat on my lap.

[Operator] That doesn't sound odd.

The neighborhood cat.

(upbeat music continues)

Okay.

(upbeat music continues)

Except it wasn't a cat.

It was a woman who's dressed like a cat

and for some reason, society treats as a cat.

And I just spent like, like two hours

masturbating to it after it happened.

[Mr. Simon] Henderson in there?

[Dana] No.

[Mr. Simon] You tell that cock sucker I need to see him

he can't hide from me forever.

(dramatic music)

(dramatic music continues)

(footsteps tapping)

[Crime Lord] Good morning. Good Morning, Chance.

This is an odd room.

[Crime Lord] My grandfather, my grandfather,

they were big on the old ways of doing business.

The old ways of crime and drugs. I live for the future.

Ha, getting that.

This room looks like the not too distant future.

[Crime Lord] It does.

This is the brain center of my operation.

Here we can control the drug operation for the entire state.

They are looking for laptops, cell phone, if that.

Police, they think we are but a disorganized mob

gangs with switchblades, here, we are the future of crime.

Yeah, they keep trying.

[Crime Lord] Did you get them free?

I pulled every string in the book

every favor to get them bail,

at last, I got them off scot-free.

Sorry, sorry.

(dramatic music continues)

[Crime Lord] I wasn't afraid you were going to talk.

That is not my concern.

I know you, I couldn't stay mad at you.

I want you to know what you saw.

(Lori groaning) (Sarah laughing)

Oh, sorry. How's the apartment going?

[Dana] Oh, it's fine.

Great, if you need anything, just ask.

Sure.

Oh, if you're curious

my show, "The littlest captain," is on Tubi.

It's a cute GI show about a child boat captain.

I wrote like two episodes.

Oh yeah.

Yeah, it's about a trip steamer during World War II.

It mostly avoids the German U-boat situation.

But I ended up doing a fair amount of research.

Right, yeah, I studied that in college.

- You did? - Yeah.

Well in, in terms of gas protection, so interesting.

So much of World War II is about the fact that the Germans

actually ran out of oil.

Well, not so much ran out of oil,

but their ability to be reducing it

wasn't enough for their war as us.

You sound like a middle-aged dad.

Uh-huh, you know,

I have a ton of Haagen-Dazs. Do you want some?

The ex-boyfriend just got nominated for an Oscar

just completed a deal for a new show with NBC, possibly.

He's doing great.

He's also more male and has more of daddy's money than I do.

Well, you know,

don't be jealous of other people's successes.

Without revenge, how will I know I'm living well?

- Ah. - How about you?

Oh, well um, you know,

I don't wanna say I moved to LA for a breakup

'cause we broke up like five months ago.

But um, yeah, greener pastures definitely help.

You should see this place during the early spring.

The rain hits, this turns into a garden.

Mm-hmm, right.

Yeah, but honestly it was really hard.

I haven't done much of anything these past five months.

Yeah, I know the feeling.

Springtime waits for all of us.

(door creaking) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

LA has 'em by the score.

(romantic music)

(romantic music continues)

(door slamming)

(romantic music continues)

(Dana yawning)

(door slamming)

(romantic music continues)

(Dana laughing) God.

(romantic music continues)

Oh, God.

(lips smacking) (romantic music continues)

I knew this was happening more than once (indistinct).

Oh, that works.

(Romantic music continues)

(Romantic music continues)

(Dana sighing) What an erotic dream.

(Dana gasping) I walked right into that one, whew.

Oh, that was my favorite nightgown.

(Lori groaning)

Why does it smell like candles in here?

(Lori groaning)

Well, do you want some breakfast?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Oh, let's go. (Lori imitating cat meowing)

I hope you like toast and eggs.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Would you like some milk?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(lips smacking) (footsteps tapping)

(glass thudding) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

(Lori slurping)

Right.

Um, I thought it was something. You agree?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Yeah, I thought you would. (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Well I'm gonna, um.

(Lori groaning continues)

Well, this really has been something, um

did you bring a coat? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Oh God, nice spending the evening with you.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Pleasant time was had by all.

(knees thudding) (door slamming)

Okay, well that happened.

Oh, oh, did I ruin my panties too?

(upbeat music)

Rough night?

Ever have a night

where you had to fundamentally reorganize

your concept of existence and then the next day

work on the possibility of Bolivian oil potential?

Listen up people, if these numbers don't go up,

we're gonna have to lay some people off.

Life goes on, you know, hope that works out.

- Not you, Henderson. - Understood.

I want to see what you've got.

No matter how much you irritate me,

I'm not letting you go that easy.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(door slamming) Is anyone here?

You know, it's pretty scummy,

if I don't feel like I have control over my own apartment,

feel safe here.

It's important.

Just, I, I just, I.

(knuckles rapping)

Sorry ma'am, but I have a singing telegram.

What?

Yeah, I do these to pay the bills.

What's a-

♪ I'm sorry, and I apologize ♪

That's it.

Well, I mean that's it, is in a line, but that's it.

That's it?

I assume you know what that means.

I hope I'm not violating any restraining orders.

You know, I shouldn't linger around waiting for a tip.

But, right.

(door slamming)

(knuckles rapping)

Sorry, I just got a new telegram.

It's not like magic, I didn't fly there.

I just, I hadn't gotten in my car yet and,

it says, "I hope someday you will forgive me."

Once again, still not a tip situation.

Is this just like on your phone or?

Yeah, I mean, whoever's sending you these,

they could probably just text you.

I dunno why they're doing this, it's like 50 bucks.

Yeah, right.

(door creaking) (door slamming)

Am I mad?

This real shit is weird, but I'm exploring it.

(dramatic music)

- Well, it was dark. - How much has this costed me?

60,000.

For 60,000, I want more than, "It was dark."

Someone came at us and attacked us.

I didn't hear a thing and it was so damn quiet.

[Crime Lord] No guns.

No, man, they knocked us out, just came at us

didn't see nothing, man.

Me too hard as hell, and I just woke up in an ambulance.

This my friend

is the latest in high tech gadgets lie detector

and you are telling the truth as far as it can determine.

I, I will say it couldn't have been one guy

or we're talking at least a 10 big strong men

to do what they did to us.

(dramatic music continues)

Hello?

Hey, have you seen the neighborhood cat?

Not this morning.

Oh, where does she sleep?

I prefer not to know.

Hello?

Hello?

(dramatic music continues)

I didn't even know we had this.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(Dana gasping) Oh, hi, you can talk.

That's okay, it's, I, I want to say that I'm sorry.

Honestly, hear you kitty cat, it's kind of beautiful.

I have been a bit weirded out it, it's strange.

I've also slept with you at various points,

but I have come to realize that, that's okay.

You're okay, and uh, you're good.

So honestly, thank you for everything you've done.

In life and stressful situations, sometimes

a bit of added stress is actually kind of good for it.

I really appreciate everything you've done for me and,

(Dana gasping) oh God, (Dana groaning and gasping)

(Dana groaning and gasping continues)

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, yeah.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music continues)

It's Saturday, so I'm gonna go for a run, up in the hills.

Do you wanna come? (Lori groaning)

Okay. Well, are you gonna be here when I get back?

(Lori groaning)

Right, okay.

Well, if you leave, lock up

and if not milk is in the fridge.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

[Mr. Chance] You believe them?

[Crime Lord] That lie detector is pretty good

in telling them, afterward told me

that it was telling the truth.

What is it?

[Crime Lord] None of the alarms went off.

No?

[Crime Lord] You told me none of the drugs were touched.

It's a shell corporation. They can't touch us.

[Crime Lord] Yes, but it was all there.

Yes, the police arrived five minutes afterwards.

[Crime Lord] Hmm.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music continues)

Oh, there's a wisdom tree, I wonder what that is.

You paying attention? (Lori groaning)

Do you want some dinner? (Lori groaning)

You want some dinner?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

I thought so.

(material rustling)

Do you want to watch some TV?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(material rustling)

Do you want me to just sit here?

(Lori groaning)

(Dana chuckling)

(Lori groaning)

(Lori groaning continues)

(Lori groaning continues)

(Lori groaning continues)

Still looking for your cat?

Kind of, hmm.

She's probably out, you know, living her life.

Oh, right.

She'll come back, cats always do.

[Max] What's going on?

Dana's looking for her cat.

Her cat.

She's not my cat.

Oh, no.

No. That would be slavery.

True.

That would be wrong.

Hey, some people are into that kind of thing.

More, more power to them, to the max.

You know, the catchphrase.

She's not my cat.

[Crime Lord] All of this is unfortunate.

People want drugs, my rivals want drugs.

People who can make money off it.

Only so many of them would rather it all be stolen.

Maybe we get it back.

People who goes to the police.

(wood scraping) (Lori groaning)

You make me stuck.

I like making you stuck, to have your mind.

(Lori groaning)

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music continues)

(Lori groaning)

(upbeat music continues)

(vegetables snapping) (upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues) (Lori groaning continues)

(upbeat music continues) (Lori groaning continues)

You want some? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

Oh, this is the hardest thing yet.

(upbeat music continues)

Sorry, oh my God, sorry.

It's all right, oh, hey, um, I have a question.

Shoot, yeah.

Are you sleeping with the,

to be clear, the woman dressed like a cat.

Yes, yeah.

Cool, no, no judgment or anything

I mean, hey, queer life, queer representation.

- Right, I'm queer now. - Yay.

Yeah, yes, good. Nice to say.

- Great. - Whoa.

Oh, oh, so, okay, so she slept over last night, right?

- Sure. - But we didn't have sex.

Well that-

- And she stayed in a different room.

These Bolivian oil fields ain't where we need them to be.

There's oil in them fields, I can feel it in my bones

and it's up to you men to find it.

Geology doesn't work based on feeling.

You can't, this guy (Mr. Simon laughing).

(upbeat music)

(gunshots firing)

[Gangster] You're not gonna take me alive.

(gunshots firing)

(body thumping)

Did you just sleep here all day?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Like, do you have a, a job or, yes you.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Fair, very fair.

(material rustling) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Okay, hug,

double hug.

(Dana groaning) (lips smacking)

Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I feel like I want to like get to know you better.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Like, do you wanna hear about my day?

(Lori groaning)

Okay.

Well, I had a meeting with my boss.

Well, I think he's my boss,

but the chain of command is very hard to establish.

And then had a good lunch,

had my homemade soup and some nice bread

and, oh, it's delicious and warm.

But not as warm as you, not as warm as you.

(Lori groaning) (lips smacking)

(gentle music)

(gentle music continues)

(gentle music continues)

(gentle music continues)

(wood scraping)

(gentle music continues)

(door creaking) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

(gentle music continues)

(door creaking) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

(gentle music continues)

(door creaking) (gentle music continues)

(Lori groaning) (Dana laughing) Hi.

(lips smacking) I have to go to work.

You gonna be okay out here?

(Lori groaning)

I have a meeting with Tubi about developing a new show.

Wish me Luck.

(gentle music continues)

[Reporter] There are continued reports

of a strange phenomena happening in the criminal underworld

as a major drug operations are being stopped left and right.

There is some speculation that it's linked

to the wild standoff on Wednesday in Irwindale.

Police have offered no comment in into it or-

(keyboard tapping) (gentle music continues)

Ah.

(gentle music continues)

Oh, hey, um, I was wondering if I could get a meeting?

- Sure. - Yeah.

I think there's a good prudent oil source in,

what is the Chima (indistinct)

yeah, it looks like the signs of it.

Oh, that's pretty deep in the mountains.

Yeah, but I think it may be worth an exploration.

Well, you're gonna have to talk to the old man about that.

Setting up a new storage facility.

Don't worry, boss.

With all the men and security systems,

no one is going to be able to break in.

[Crime Lord] Men I am only so faithful is the machines.

Men are weak, both in mind and body.

We cannot be trusted too much to emotion, machines.

(dramatic music) (metal clanking)

(dramatic music continues)

Hi, um, I wanted to talk to you. Can I?

Yeah, it's worth talking about.

Yeah, maybe over golf next week.

Weekend? Sure, but let's do it midweek.

That way I can ditch work and call it business.

Later.

Sorry about that.

See, this wouldn't happen if we were golfing.

These employees just walk,

think they can walk in anytime they want.

(dramatic music)

(door creaking)

And dinner.

Ding-ding-dong, fish.

Fish, fish, I have fish.

[Lori] Hey.

(Lori imitating cat meowing) (plastic rustling)

(Dana speaking indistinctly)

So I think my boss is crazy, mm.

Because there's only a couple people at the company, right?

And they all seem to tolerate him fine, right?

So, I did some research and he's one of the founders

of the company, they can't fire him, right?

So I'm wondering if like,

this entire office is just a setup, you know,

just to keep him as far away as possible

so he can't cause any damage.

(dramatic music continues)

(Lori imitating cat meowing) (dramatic music continues)

It's crazy, I don't know.

I don't wanna quit 'cause the pays good

but I'm just not sure.

(dramatic music continues)

(indistinct) I know. (glass clanking)

(lips smacking) (Dana groaning)

(wood scraping)

(upbeat music)

(material rustling) (lips smacking)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues) (Lori groaning)

(upbeat music continues) (Lori groaning continues)

(upbeat music continues) (Lori groaning continues)

(lips smacking) (upbeat music continues)

I love you.

(keyboard tapping)

(upbeat music)

Sorry. I just like working out in the nude.

At least you can explain it, right?

You're a doctor.

Yeah, unfortunately there's a California law that says

I can't practice this, in the nude.

It's a joke, who cares?

(Dana laughing) No, you're, it's fine, I mean.

There's some weird stuff happening in my life.

- Fall in love? - Yeah.

Always weird.

(upbeat music continues)

Yeah, well, just not really sure if she loves me.

Not really sure of anything.

Well, you love her, that's something, not the second part.

- What? - Life.

(dramatic music)

(Drug Dealers screaming)

(dramatic music continues)

(gunshots firing) (Drug Dealers screaming)

(dramatic music continues)

(dramatic music continues)

[Police Person] Wow, that's a lot of drugs

and a lot of unconscious bodies.

Like seriously?

Have you seen

that much drugs before? Once.

(dramatic music continues)

(footsteps tapping) (upbeat music)

(door creaking) (Lori imitating cat meowing)

I got you something, that's for you.

(Lori imitating cat meowing) (cardboard rustling)

(upbeat music continues)

(Lori imitating cat meowing continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(cardboard rustling continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(Lori imitating cat meowing continues)

(knuckles rapping) (upbeat music continues)

I have a delivery for two orders of filet Mignon,

julienne potatoes and heavy cream.

Oh that's right. Oh.

It's on the list.

(Lori imitating cat meowing) (cardboard thumping)

The gratuity charge was added already.

(upbeat music continues)

Better than a mouse or a lizard.

(upbeat music continues)

Your dinner's getting cold, right.

(upbeat music continues)

You know, I don't think you're fully appreciating

that bed I got you.

(upbeat music continues)

I got it 'cause, um, oh,

'cause you can stay here if you want to.

(upbeat music continues)

Well, if that's not a big deal to you,

it's a big deal to me.

I mean, it's like, it's like asking you

to leave your toothbrush over or something.

(gentle music)

Where is your toothbrush?

I'm gonna get you a toothbrush.

[Police Person] Jesus Christ, the amount of drugs this is.

(footsteps tapping)

What's this?

[Police Person] You the lawyer?

Yes.

[Police Person] Whoever your client is

they're in a lot of trouble.

Five, five, five, oversee.

Fake street company is in deep water.

Is that so?

[Police Person] Like no guns?

How many people did this take?

How long did this take to plan?

What kind of thing could do this?

(upbeat music)

All I know is some nonsense is going out on the streets.

Stupid, stupid, stupid nonsense.

(upbeat music continues)

Greetings there, friends.

Now some of you are speculating what is happening

on the streets of our fair city.

I want to massage your fear and panic right now.

In my expert opinion, we are dealing with a bat,

mm-hmm, a giant bat.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

You see, a bat flies on wings that are made of skin,

unlike a bird which has feathers that would be preposterous.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

So it's coming down from the fly and grabbing people

and taking them back to its guano caves

to turn into pure silver.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

How does it find people?

Well, bats, unlike any other animals, have echolocation.

Echolocation is a primitive formed sonar

that lets pin people to take

to the aforementioned guano caves.

(upbeat music continues)

Now folks, I don't know what's going on in the streets.

Crime destruction, powerful forces.

The only thing I do know, is fuck the police.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

Did I mention it was stupid?

(upbeat music continues)

Why does a giant bat need silver?

In order to buy small insects, which it primarily eats.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

Thus, there is no need for concern.

(footsteps tapping)

You want some breakfast?

(Lori groaning)

Mm, okay, it's wet food.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(indistinct) You eat crackers? Crackers for you,

(door creaking) (telephone ringing)

Mom.

[Mother] Hey darling, I was curious

I have a business conference in LA, really volunteered

as I thought it would be a great way to see you

and how your life is stacking up.

(upbeat music)

Great, yeah, absolutely.

(upbeat music continues)

Everything okay?

My mom is coming to town.

How fun, did I mention I have a kid? Did I mention that?

Me and my husband, she's already in high school,

if you can believe it.

Oh man, you just moved in, must be stressful.

Yeah, I just have some stuff I gotta figure out.

(upbeat music continues)

Wait, this is Los Angeles, I have access to restaurants.

(upbeat music continues)

You won't mind, will you?

- Darling, darling. - Mom.

- Darling, baby, darling. - Hi.

So this is the place you wanted to take me?

Yeah, well, to meet you at my, my apartment kind of-

- Oh, I understand, this place is fine.

So what's good here?

Uh, the food, I think.

(footsteps tapping)

(dramatic music)

Dana. (upbeat music)

Yes, Dana. Oh, is this your sister?

(Mother and Lori laughing)

She invited me. I'm Dana's friend, Lori.

It's a pleasure to meet her mother.

Yeah, how nice to meet you, invite my friend Lori.

Well, invite me, I invite myself, I tend to do that.

[Mother] It's all right, have a seat.

Thank you.

Yeah, we met in the building and gotten really close.

Yeah, how did you, how'd you know about this, Lori?

Oh, I have my secrets (Lori giggling)

Well, I'm glad you're making friends.

My Dana, my Dana has never been great at making friends

it's like I don't absolutely need to see her apartment

but you know, I worry, she not showing it to me

is a sign that it could be, you know,

how should I put this, uninhabitable?

Oh no, you don't have to worry, it's spotless.

I've been in it, it it looks great.

Yeah, my friend Lori has spending a bunch,

so don't even, don't even.

So tell me all about yourself, Lori, darling.

Yes, yes, Lori, please do.

Oh, I came to LA did this, did that, some projects.

Um, it gives me a lot of free time.

(fists thumping) (dramatic music)

No, no, no.

(door creaking) (footsteps tapping)

Shame Lori had to go, but I have to see this place.

Yeah.

Lori said you were just being overly dramatic

and that it looked nice.

Oh yeah. She would know that, Lori.

And I have to say, she's right,

darling, this is wonderful.

And it's so much bigger than I thought it was gonna be.

And the view, can you see the ocean?

Ah, yeah, the landlord said you should be able to,

but honestly I haven't really been able to see it.

When did we get a water bowl?

Do you have a cat?

I was able to run away, but God, it was horrible.

[Crime Lord] How many men?

I, I don't know, it seems like a dozen of them,

but I ever saw one and it was in shadows

and dressed all in black.

You said you have all the high tech?

[Crime Lord] Yes, yes, see.

Let's get this to the lab. I'm curious what's in it.

- Fancy Goodsy stars. - It's not us.

- Is this room 5A? - Down the hall.

To make extra money, I rent this space out

to make music videos.

(dramatic music)

Okay, that was a stunt, that was a stunt.

You can talk like, I, I don't even know

if I should be angry right now or if, ah, okay.

(machine whirring)

It's a stimulant of some kind, I'm not sure what it is.

It's not an opiate or recreational.

Interesting, I don't know all about science stuff.

[Tenant] Okay, I got two tons of grip gear

that has to go somewhere.

[Crime Lord] We usually stage back here.

Oh, oh, oh, that's what that's about, huh?

Okay.

Everything okay?

Oh yeah, well, I, I just put in a memo

about the Bolivian oil potential.

So waiting to hear back on that.

Oh yeah, he's very busy, but I'm sure he'll get back.

Right. You?

Oh, very hectic, people don't realize

what a big pressure it is to hire people.

You know how expensive it is, how time consuming, you know,

people go into job interviews, very nervous.

But look at me, we'll get there.

[Mr. Simon] Let's keep at it, people.

We'll get there.

[Mr. Simon] One lower than the other.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(Lori imitating cat meowing continues)

Your back is amazing.

People don't normally compliment backs, but, wow.

You are so perfectly beautiful.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(Dana sighing) I don't know. Think I might quit my job.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

It's a weird, weird environment.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

But it pays well, my boss isn't mean to me,

and I have to pay my bills and my car, my apartment.

And you, I have to feed my kitty.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

(knuckles rapping)

(door creaking) (footsteps tapping)

(door creaking)

- Yeah, I have a check here. - What?

Like you can just mail these things

but I shouldn't complain.

- That's $1,200. - Great.

Like, I wouldn't ask for tip on money.

I don't think it's appropriate.

- That's half the rent. - Wish I had that.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

You know, most house pets aren't good for rent

so who am I to complain?

Thank you, I love you. (Lori imitating cat meowing)

You run?

No, working on a big belly (skin smacking).

(Max laughing) Still got a waste to go.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

You two hitting it off?

Yeah, actually I think we've officially moved in together.

- That's a big step. - Yeah.

You ever done that with someone before?

No, actually. You?

- No closes, but no. - Yeah.

So where's she going?

- This is Dixie. - Here's the thing.

There were 15 people in that building

and they all claimed to have seen one person.

I mean, there were 15 there, and they only saw one person.

I mean, it was, they that they said, it was conflicting,

but they said it was one person.

- Again, how could they do it? - You know, it was dark.

Maybe there was more than just one person.

(dramatic music)

- So one person. - You know,

one person could get through security.

10? I don't think so.

- That's just more dangerous. - Oh, but paradoxically

sometimes easier to find.

Now as your attorney, I have something to say.

We have one weapon, money.

[Crime Lord] Greatest machines there is.

(gentle music)

(gentle music continues)

(footsteps tapping)

Do you want a cat door? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Can you fit into a cat door? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

The conference went great, busy, but great.

Sorry, I couldn't spend more time with you, darling.

Glad I met your friend. It's nice for gals to have pals.

Do you want a key? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Right.

You know, sometimes I just wonder what she's doing.

Well, you can make her an indoor house cat.

She's a human being.

How was your day? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

Is that an (indistinct)? (Lori imitating cat meowing)

She seemed independently wealthy, LA is the city for her.

Do you have like a, a job or profession?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

- Can I tell you a secret? - What?

I was sworn to secrecy.

She owns the building, doesn't she?

Yeah, it's like the only thing that makes sense.

Only reason you guys would tolerate her.

It's just, is there another home that you go to?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Well, I guess I don't have to say it.

I kind of figured, course she wouldn't tell me.

I think I understood everything you just said.

She doesn't talk to you, does she?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Yes, this is very interesting, very interesting.

Once you find something, trace it to its source.

Listen up people.

Looks like we got ourselves a golden goose

50 to a hundred thousand barrels easy.

We're sending teams to prove it.

Looks like we might have enough oil

to pump fucking LA for a year.

(Mr. Simon laughing)

Good find Henderson, good find.

Henderson here, just want himself a trip to Hawaii.

Let's see who gets the steak knives?

(Mr. Simon laughing)

(plastic thudding)

I don't, I don't even need to go to Hawaii,

it's just rainy.

I just, oh, pisses me off when men steal women's work,

at least the men in question usually exist.

So what did you do?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Right.

It's just, it's just, you know,

when this first started happening, it was different

and, and different can be really good, right?

Like, silly, fun.

Like, do you ever wanna get married? Do you wanna have kids?

Like, would you even answer me any of that?

(Lori groaning)

Oh my God, I can live with the not talking.

Like a lot of people have partners that can't talk.

I just wish that you-

(knuckles rapping)

I have a message for you. Another singing telegram.

No, no, not singing, so telegram.

Okay, and this is, this is how you wanna talk to me?

You want the truth? Well, here it is.

In the last few years, the war on drugs has grown

to a fever pitch. What?

Reading it.

Um, the police were helpless to stop the decay of crime

in the big city.

The government steeped in with, stepped in

with a new kind of weapon against crime,

a super weapon to fight the forces of elil.

I think that's a typo. Oh, sorry, I'm guessing evil.

Evil, yeah.

A test subject, semicolon, the only female trainee

to pass delta force training, Sergeant Lori Levy.

Sorry, this was capitalized in the message it threw me off.

Was subject to chemical stimulants

using urchin hormones and high tech stimulants

to create a new breed of super soldier.

This was known as project Bear.

What the fuck?

I'm just reading the message.

I screwed up a couple times. You want me to start again?

Project Bear?

Are we done here?

Could have done that better, more bread.

(Dana sighing)

What gets me is, I mean, you're not magic, right?

Or did the government give you magic powers, hmm?

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

It gave you money, I guess.

You already set that up beforehand

already wanted to tell me.

Am I in danger?

Look, look, I, I just want a normal nine to five, okay?

I want, I want a normal apartment

I want, I want a six pack abs.

I, I do not want a government super soldier as my partner

who in their free time dresses up as a cat.

I want normality. Is that so much to ask the world for?

Tell me you love me. Tell me, just tell me.

(door creaking)

(Dana crying)

(phone ringing)

(Dana crying continues)

(phone ringing continues)

(Dana crying continues)

- Mom. - Darling, darling,

baby darling, are you okay?

No, no (Dana crying), I'm not okay.

(Dana crying continues)

(dramatic music)

I screwed up, I screwed up.

(dramatic music continues)

[Gangster] This is the girl.

[Crime Lord] Good evening, we have never met.

But for the last months, you have been rather

a vexing side in my operations in the city.

I have lost so, so much drugs to you.

Wait, what kind of drugs?

- Nuke. - What's nuke?

[Crime Lord] Don't play dumb. I know you are The Bear.

What? No.

- Don't play dumb with me. - I know all about it.

Yes, I would know the government paid you very well.

Very well indeed, me, not so much.

Who are you? You're a part of this weird crime thing too?

Wait, this isn't Sergeant Levy.

- What? - I created a super soldier.

I think I would remember what it looks like.

She doesn't much look like one to me.

Why get her?

I assumed it was like a Captain America

and she was a 98 pound weakling.

Okay, but after it was a 98 pound weakling,

it turned into Chris Evans and stayed that way.

This is just- Look, I am not

an 98 pound weakling.

(city streets buzzing)

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

You know, you do stuff

thinking it'll fix all your problems

or maybe create a new set of problems.

But sometimes problems are problems, people are people.

Emotional little things

motivated by weird jealousies and issues.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Yeah, but, sometimes they're still your human,

your people, cherish them.

(Mr. Chance sighing) This is a big mistake.

That woman we're gonna have to, we're gonna have to-

- [Crime Lord] This is a great boom.

Sending two guys funky guys to get Superman.

That is idiocy (indistinct)

our entire gang, wouldn't cause her to spit too much.

Well.

You look at people like that.

They all seem so tough, invulnerable.

How do this stop them?

It's not magic or little green vex.

Invulnerable people care about the vulnerable things.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Dana? Dana?

(dramatic music)

Alpaca.

(dramatic music continues)

[Crime Lord] The woman you gave her

the power of The Bear. It took years.

But once she got that stimulant in her body,

she became so powerful, like a Mac tank,

but so quiet, God, she's quiet.

Have you heard her? It's a effects.

(dramatic music)

(tiger growling)

(lion roaring) (dramatic music continues)

- She's beautiful. - This power

is it stronger in all of my machines, my technology?

(dramatic music continues)

(dramatic music continues)

A man may be insulted by this.

A man may think his work is worthless, me I think to expand.

Good doctor, how much do you want?

(dramatic music continues)

You're paying me?

(Crime Lord laughing)

How much? (Wolf howling)

Give me the power of The Bear.

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Oh man, think she's gonna show up?

No.

(footsteps tapping) (hands smacking)

(dramatic music continues)

[Crime Lord] The alarms do work

is probably a bit agitated and angry.

Seeing a bear angry?

- She's not a bear. - Oh.

That is one thing I can tell you about.

I gave her the power of a bear.

Well. (door creaking)

(door slamming)

Nervous? (metal clanking)

[Crime Lord] You should be after my special secret.

(dramatic music continues)

Yeah?

(dramatic music continues)

(metal clanking) (gangster groaning)

Can you see what she does? (dramatic music continues)

(gunshots firing)

I know who she is. (dramatic music continues)

(hand slapping) (body thumping)

(dramatic music continues)

[Crime Lord] Well, well, bears are very fast animals

but they are not faster than bullets, I think.

- No. - So now you talk.

He's got a gun, if there was a gun, I would've talked.

Quiller's always had a way with the ladies.

[Lori] Quiller.

So you're part of this plot too?

[Lori] I know her.

I didn't think you'd work for the likes of him.

Didn't you tell me nuke killed your daughter.

- Nuke is a thing? - No, but money is.

[Lori] You don't need it.

Well, that's what nuke is, money.

They told me you were writing a bunch of checks

buying apartment buildings.

I just clean up scum for them, scum like you.

Also, my grandmother's independently wealthy.

My offer is simple, take your girl, leave this city.

Never bother me again.

Or if you want a more honest one, I let her leave

if you go down the quiet.

(dramatic music continues)

- Dana. - Yeah.

Meow.

(fists thumping) (Lori groaning)

(fists thumping continues) (Lori groaning continues)

(dramatic music continues)

[Mr. Chance] Stop it. Stop it.

(Dr. Quiller groaning)

- I made you what you are. - No you didn't, I did.

(Dr. Quiller groaning) (body thumping)

Stop it. Stop it.

You look professional. You a lawyer?

Yes.

Let me tell you about leverage.

It only lasts as long as the gun is pointed.

The minute you fire, it goes away, something to think about.

(Mr. Chance groaning)

(footsteps tapping)

(material rustling)

You think you are so great.

You think you are so great now.

Now I have the power of The Bear.

I have the power of The Bear, the strength, the ferocity.

I have the power of the- (body thumping)

It doesn't work that way.

(gentle music)

[Police Person] Well, that's what happens

when you take bear cocaine.

He tampered in God's domain. Don't do that.

[Police Person] No one must know

our secret connection, as you violate

so, so many principles of constitutional law.

(dramatic music) (bolt swooshing)

Haven't seen her around, I'm free.

I'm free, I tell you, I'm free (Sarah squealing)

Tubi wants 15 episodes about Jack Spread,

who could eat no fat?

We are curious if you're willing to work from home.

(Mr. Simon whimpering)

Mr. Simon has come to terms

with his employee situation on site.

(Mr. Simon crying)

Why am I so lonely? Why am I so lonely?

Hope you have a nice home life.

(Dana sighing)

Yeah, Mom, I had a series of incidents,

but I think it's all taken care of now.

Also, I'm gay.

The reports continue to be sketchy

and there has been only limited official word.

It appears that once again,

the city is safe from crime and havoc.

Thanks to the mysterious figure known as The Bear.

(knuckles rapping) (footsteps tapping)

(door creaking) (Dana sighing)

(knuckles rapping) (door creaking)

(material rustling)

(Lori imitating cat meowing)

Take me home. (Lori whimpering)

for the right person.

Um, I. (Lori whimpering)

Who will love me as much as I love them, oh.

(paper rustling)

(upbeat music)

I wouldn't normally gripe about a tip,

but that's a serious flight of stairs and she's very heavy.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music fades out)

(gentle music)