All language subtitles for Black Monday s02e02_English

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ It's Showtime tonight ♪

[Blair] Previously on
Black Monday...

We are about to get rich
as fuck

buying Amerisavings & Loan.

[Blair]
Congressman Roger Harris.

My man!

You want to buy up
retail banks

to gamble on the stock market.

[Blair]
Do we have a deal?

I need your chunk
of Amerisavings.

I would love to work
with you,

but until Mo's behind bars,

I will never do business
with your company.

You can shop the deal
if you want,

but where are you gonna go?

How could you betray
my family?

They're the ones who were
behind your kidnapping.

[Lare]
Do you honestly think

that he is not out there
right now plotting his revenge?

- Hello?
- Mo, Miami--

- Keith, shit!
- You son of a bitch.

I found you.

[man]
If you see him,

do not attempt
to apprehend him,

but call our hotline.

[cars honking]

[groans]

Good morning, you.

Hmm.

Now that's the kind
of political wakeup call

I like.

I have an urgent poll
to show you.

Shit, is it the new Gallup?
Is it bad?

No, it's-it's my pole.

It's my dick.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

I'd like to get a hold
of that poll.

And gallop,
Big B.

- [laughs]
- Yeah?

Yeah?
Reverse cowguy?

- Mm-hmm.
- [knocking at door]

Housekeeping.

- [vacuum whirring]
- Come back later, por favor.

Aha.
[moans]

♪ funky music ♪

Uh, no usted today!

Damn it.

speaking Spanish

[Roger]
Big B, what the--

- Fuck! Get the fuck out!
- I told you no more hotels.

It's too public.

We need a place
that's just ours.

- Tad, get the fuck out!
- And of course your wife's.

We've been looking
for months, but newsflash,

- Tiff is particular.
- [Tiff] Fuck.

Well, you better find
something.

A homo-hotel tryst would ruin
both our lives and careers.

You don't think I know that,
Roger?

[Tiff] In here.

speaking Spanish

[Blair]
De nada, friend.

So...

how was the sexual congress...

man?

Well, it was...

- Do you have a robe, or--
- I do not.

I'm--

[both] So sorry.

Oh, please.
We've all seen it.

♪ Queen's
"I Want to Break Free" ♪

♪♪♪

♪ I want to break free ♪

♪♪♪

♪ I want to break free ♪

♪♪♪

♪ I want to break free
from your lies ♪

♪ You're so self-satisfied ♪

Right on there, Keith!

[both] Hey, Keith.

- [man] Keith!
- ♪ I've got to break free ♪

♪♪♪

♪ God knows ♪

♪ God knows I want
to break free ♪

[man] Thanks, boss.

Thanks, boss.

Thanks, boss.

- Thanks, boss.
- Later, skaters.

♪ I've fallen in love
for the first time ♪

♪ This time I know
it's for real ♪

Keep her close.

♪♪♪

[band playing
tropical music]

♪♪♪

Hey, okay.

Um, so we're gonna take
a quick fiver.

Thank you very sweetly.

I am Antoine LeFaro,

and we are So Close,
Yet So Antoine.

[coughs]

Another Mudslide, Gordo.

[laughs]
Another mudslide?

Jesus, how many of these
have you had?

- Get off my back.
- They're not good for you.

I mean, come on, how much
coke have you had today, Keith?

- A lot, but I can handle it.
- Exactly.

You don't have a leg
to stand on.

Well, you're not gonna have
a leg to stand on either

when the diabetes devil
comes for you.

Whatever.

I'm glad I gave up booger sugar
for sugar-sugar.

Just saying, you got
a lot of stumps

in your family tree, huh?

Is there something
that you wanted, Keith,

'cause you waved me over here
kind of frantically.

You were on America's
Most Unsolved Crimes.

[laughs]

That's so cool.

It's not cool.

It is hot,
as in the heat is on,

but not in the cool
Glenn Frey way, okay?

It is time for you
to put in action

whatever plan
you've been cooking up

to clear your name
and get back on top.

I don't have a plan, okay?

Don't you want revenge

on all those people
who fucked you over?

I mean, Dawn and Blair...

me.

Nah, man.
I'm good.

That whole Mo Monroe life,
that's behind me now.

Maybe I should just disappear
to the Maldives.

- The what?
- It's basically Kokomo.

"Get there fast, take it slow"
kind of vibe.

I spent a week there one night.

It's the happiest
I've ever been.

I'll sail out there, catch on
with another hotel band,

and spend the rest of my days

laying down the low end
in paradise.

No shirt, no shoes,
no extradition,

and all the minibar Toblerone
I can boost.

Don't worry so much, K-Man.
Life is sweet.

- Top me off, Gordo.
- Top you off?

- No, no, no.
- There we go.

- Oh.
- [laughs]

[Anna]
Mr. and Mrs. Pfaff,

do you see those specks
in the left lung?

- Mm-hmm.
- Melanoma cells,

which means the cancer's
metastasized.

So what's the prognosis?

I'd say you've got two,
maybe three weeks left to live

in that hotel,

'cause you'll be moving

into Ms. Caldwell's classic
six on the Park

once her ass
is six feet under.

- [laughs]
- Yeah!

See, babe?
I told you.

Anna is Manhattan's
best realtor.

Yep, because my sister

is Manhattan's
best hospice nurse.

They call me the Grim Realtor.

I like to have fun
with my materials.

Cute.

The way I see it,
once God closes a door,

Anna closes a deal.

Well, it does have everything
we need.

Two masters,
discreet service entrance,

and the same bedroom alarms
Michael Jackson uses.

We'll take it.

But what it doesn't have
is the address.

63rd and Broadway?

I told you to only look
at co-ops on the Park

between 81st and 82nd.

It's the best block in town.

Yes, but those families
never sell, they just--

Hand them down

from gentrification
to gentrification.

I know.
I grew up there.

Which is why I wasn't sure

if I should bring this up
or not,

but an apartment on that block
did just pop up for sale.

- [gasps]
- Oh, we'll take it.

It's in your parents'
building.

Oh, yoinks.

Uh, they had a bit
of a falling out last season.

Autumn.

Yeah, that Page Six
blind item

wasn't too tough
to decipher.

"What bosomy brat
caused a major family tiff

when she cut off jeans company
from her own parents?"

May I say, I admire
your ruthlessness.

Well, that isn't exactly
the whole story, Anna.

- Okay. A momentito.
- Oh.

Babe, you have got to try

to be open
to new neighborhoods.

We've got to get out
of that hotel

before Page Six
starts writing

about a certain unisex-named
Wall Street bull

taking precautions
and Special K

with his special K Street bear.

Maybe I should write
for Page Six.

I don't know, I don't know.

Okay.
Let's go see it.

[growls]

Anna, would your sister
be hospice-able

to sneak Ms. Caldwell
enough Dilaudid

to miss us sneaking through
di-lauded apartment?

I am on fire with these.

No, Blair, I'm talking about
going to see the apartment

in my parents' building.

What?

I deserve to live
on that block.

And why should I avoid them?
They should avoid me.

- Yay!
- [cheering]

Get the fuck out and get me
the apartment, bitch.

Done.

[8-bit music plays on TV]

♪♪♪

[knocking at door]

[game pauses]

Who is it?

[flies buzzing]

♪ dramatic music ♪

♪♪♪

[laughs]
It's so good to see you.

- It is?
- Yes, it is!

Are you cra--
get in here, Dawn!

Jesus Christ.

I mean, shit!

Ah.
Man, look at you.

Come in, come in.

- Hey, you want to hit this?
- Okay.

[elevator dings]

Huh.
It's on my parents' floor.

Mm-hmm.

Huh.

It's on my parents' side
of the building.

[humming]

Huh.
It's behind my parents' door.

Babe, I think
it's your parents' apartment.

Anna, why didn't you
say that?

Fibbing is a major part
of real estate.

You said you wanted them
to avoid you.

Now there would be no them
to avoid...you.

- You make a good point.
- Yay.

Now, you must see the--

right, you grew up here.

I should let you
show yourselves around.

- And I'll just go fuck myself.
- Thank you.

So...
hmm.

[both laugh]

It really is great to see you,
Mo.

Or Ro, or whoever you are
down here.

- You look like a ho.
- [laughs]

No, I'm serious,

what the fuck is up
with your hair?

Oh, geez, if my hair
were any more relaxed,

it'd shit its pants.

[both laugh]

[sighs]
Hmm.

So what you playing?

- Oh, Legend of Zelda.
- Ah.

In fact, I'm glad you're here

to finally see me
beat this shit.

I'd let you hop in there too,
but it's single-player, so.

Mm.
Yeah.

I can tell from that Jergens

that you've been
on single-player for a minute.

[both laugh]

I've been beating more
than this game.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

No, but I fuck on the reg
down here in all seriousness,

so I'm pretty good there.

Cool.

Yeah, look around.

Take everything in.
Check out the amenities.

The future has arrived,

and its name is roller blade.

'Cause the wheels
are in the shape of a blade.

- It's fucking genius.
- We got company, Keith.

Holy shit, Dawnie!

Bienvenidos a Miami, chica!

Hey.

Check you out.

Check you out!

And check out
those jean shorts.

You better size up, Kiki,

'cause I can sees up
your asshole.

All right,
I will have you know,

I am and always have been
a jean short medium.

The only way
you're a jean short medium

is if you can communicate
with dead jean shorts.

[laughter]

Hey, look at that.
We're back, guys.

Classic us, right?

So what brings you a Miami?

Oh.
All right.

I get it.
I gotta go anyway.

I gotta outfit my crew.

I got a crew now
called the Cabana Boys.

- Mm.
- We move a lot of weight.

They're all excited
about the blades, you know.

Except for Randy.

We kind of had a thing,
and now we don't, and--

- You're still talking?
- Got it, I'm out.

I'm out, I'm out.
Just a little update on K-Man.

Beach day, tomorrow.

Nope.
Adios, Keith.

- [Keith] Okay, dinner?
- Keith.

Okay.

[laughs]

Yeah, some things
never change.

[Dawn]
Oh, yeah.

So...

Mo, look, about everything
that happened--

Oh, oh, please, don't even.

No, don't even go in there.

Fuck the past, you know?

I'm over that shit.

I'm happier than I've ever been
in my life.

That's great.
I'm really glad to hear that.

Yeah, so apology accepted.

No, no,
I wasn't gonna apologize.

Really?
You weren't?

'Cause you're kind of
the whole reason

I'm in this position.

You mean the happiest
position of your life?

Yeah.

Yeah, that's--

that's what I meant, sure.

Hey, you mind if I get back
to this game?

I've kind of been working on it
for the last few months.

I was about to beat it
before you showed up.

- Sure.
- Okay, great.

Great.

[game beeps]

And now it's fucked.

[Tiff]
Wow.

This place really is perfect.

Except for the taxi-denimed
horse.

[clicks tongue]
Hey, girl.

If you look close,

you can see the history
of Georgina in her eyes.

Because she's stuffed
with our short-lived

asbestos-lined firemen jeans.

New York's bravest pants.

Miss you, Scraps.

Hey.

Are you--

are you sure you don't want
to just see the Caldwell place?

[Henri] Tiffany!
Blair.

What a pleasure to see you
as always.

[chuckling]
Ah, you look...healthy.

Ruddy.

I see you grew
into the rosacea.

[chuckles]
Mother, Father.

Shame you have to sell
the apartment,

but I guess at your age,
it's good to downsize.

Oh, we're not downsizing.

We're upsizing.

We're buying a compound
in the Hamptons.

This area's a bit of
a down-and-going neighborhood.

Oh, I get it.

It's the opposite
of up-and-coming.

It's great.

Well, if you'll excuse me,

I forgot to get my World War II
memorabilia from the safe.

Not-zee most conventional
hobby,

but keeps her busy.

And now if you'll excuse me,

I'm gonna go measure
the playroom.

I want to see how big it is

without Barbie's Dream
Jeep Dealership in there.

Father.

You know,

when she was a kid,
she'd only go up there to cry.

Well, she might still be
a little upset

about the whole
"you kidnapping her" thing.

Right.

So, moving to the Hamptons.

That's a nice life.

Yeah, it's a nice lie.

We're not buying
in the Hamptons.

We're selling everything
because of the whole

"you stealing all our money"
thing.

Right.

To be honest,
of everything we've lost,

the only thing that matters
is Tiff.

I know I don't deserve it,

but would you tell her that...

Daddy still loves her?

♪ downcast music ♪

♪♪♪

- [Mo] No, Dawn, you gotta--
- [Dawn] Mo, I can fix this.

Take it easy.
A light tap.

- You know what a light tap--
- I'm barely touching it, okay?

- Okay, well, look--
- I'm hitting reset!

You're jamming your finger
in there like you--

Are you--you're still doing it
after I said--

What are you talking about?
I barely touched it!

Come on, you're fucking
hammer-handing it.

Oh, you're trying
to break it?

- I do not have hammer hands.
- Okay, you know what?

- Here, I'll break it.
- I don't--what are you--

[both] What the fuck
are you doing here?

Yes, finally!

Yell!
Say something!

Because I know you're not happy
in this shithole!

Incorrect.
I'm very happy, okay?

I've gotten rid of all
of my stress.

- Oh, oh!
- I quit doing blow!

This is the first fucking time
I've yelled

since I left New York,
and it's when you show up here.

- Oh, of course it's me.
- Imagine that, Dawn.

It's always me!

Listen, if you're not here
to apologize,

what the fuck
are you doing here?

- I am here because I--
- Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt!

- I'm so sorry guys.
- Oh, my God, Keith.

Fuck!

I might be in a bit
of a pickle, okay,

so, Mo, I need
your snorkel gear.

Long story short,
Randy's reticence to blades

was actually
quite well-founded.

Speed, it got the best of him,

and he kind of lost control

and then launched off the pier

with my entire stash
in his backpack,

and now the sharks
are circling.

Literally, there are
fucking sharks down there.

And figuratively, because once
the cartel finds out

that I lost the $1,000,000
of the blow they fronted me,

I'm a dead man.

Holy shit, Keith.

Wow.
Talk about coked to the gills.

[both laugh]

Hey, you can't feel
your teeth?

Try not feeling three rows
of teeth.

Just when you thought
it was safe

to go back in the water, it is!

Those sharks aren't gonna eat
for, like, a week!

Oh, no, they're way too busy

making a bunch
of business deals.

In sharkskin suits.

I bet they're making
a killing.

[both] 'Cause they're sharks!

[laughter]
Guys, you know,

I'm glad you two
found your rhythm again,

but I'm in a lot
of fucking trouble,

you assholes!

Whoa, Keith!

[both laugh]

- I love new Keith.
- Oh, I love him.

[both sighing]

- Oh, shit.
- Whew.

- [laughs]
- [sighs]

Ah.

Look, Mo,

the reason that I came is,
I'm worried about you.

So, I--

[scoffs]
What, is this 800K

supposed to make me
completely forget the fact

that you fucked me over?

Whoa.
That was some Rain Man shit.

How did you know how much
was in here?

'Cause, Dawn, I don't have
to be a fucking genius

to know the exact amount

that my Jammer Group shares
are worth.

You're trying to buy me out.

Well, guess it makes sense,
right?

Kind of hard to business

when you got a wanted man
on your books.

So $800,000,

and then you erase me
from the company I started.

- We started.
- I started.

We started.

You know what?
Fuck this.

It's a fair price
for your shares.

I've been knocking
for 20 minutes.

Sorry, my grandparents
soundproofed all the bedrooms

during the Dirty '30s.

Wow, this really is
the perfect apartment.

I know.

And I love it, but...

...this isn't the way
I'm supposed to get it.

My parents were supposed
to give it to me

when we got married,
like everyone's parents do.

Sweetie, I think your sense
of reality is a little--

Yeah, 'cause reality sucks.

I deserve the life
I dreamed of,

not this off-brand version.

It's Barbie's Dream House,

not her fat friend Midge's
Bed Sty HUD house.

- Is that a real toy?
- My maid's daughter had one.

It came with a block of cheese.

Nothing turned out the way
it was supposed to, Blair,

and I think that's why
I'm having such a hard time

- finding a house I love--
- [pager beeps]

Because I wanted this home,

but without compromising,
you know?

Just-just like I wanted
a fairytale marriage

without compromising,
but, I mean, my life--

who's that?

It's just Dawn
with some work stuff.

Sorry.

Look, you think
we made some compromises?

Why, because we don't have sex?

We have love and money

and sex with whoever we want.

Our arrangement
is not compromise.

It lets us have everything.

I know.
I just miss my parents, okay?

And I feel bad for them.

I mean, they shouldn't
have to live in the Hamptons

year round
like a couple of townies.

Come on, they weren't that bad.

Besides the kidnapping.

And the fat camp.

And the bulimia camp.

- Tiffany.
- Blair.

Can't we just stay in the hotel
a little longer

till I work things out
with my folks?

I want nothing more
than that.

In fact, you're not gonna
believe this,

but your dad literally just
came up to me out there, and--

I tried to patch things up
between you guys

because I could sense
that's what you want,

but he just wasn't having it.

♪ dramatic music ♪

- Really?
- Yeah.

I'm sorry.

Baby, I gave my dad
hundreds of chances,

and he just kept hurting me.

My mother always said to me,

"In life,
when something breaks,

"you can't always put it back
together,

but you can use those pieces
to move forward."

So let's take this apartment,

and use it to cut your parents
out of your life forever.

I am the only family
you need now.

Only me.

♪♪♪

Wait.
Blair and I just talked, and--

- You did?
- We'll take it.

Get the fuck out.

Burn the furniture,
and have the horse beheaded.

[Jackie] Scraps?

♪♪♪

Maybe we'll see you
in the Hamptons.

So you and Blair, huh?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

50/50, finally.

A partner who won't
fuck me over.

[laughs]
We'll see about that shit.

Look, come on, 800K,
it's more than enough seed cash

to fund whatever grand scheme
you got cooking.

Hey, I don't have any scheme.

Make your fantastic return
to Wall Street.

I don't have any scheme,
Dawn, okay?

I'm done with that.

- I told you.
- Oh, come on.

Look, I'm tired of it, okay?

Who's got
the most expensive suit?

The most endangered rug?
The longest car?

Always fucking chasing
after better.

I'm sick of that shit.

Only thing I'm gonna miss
about that life is...

...is you.

It's a good deal, Mo.

You can shop it if you want to,
but...

where are you gonna go?

♪♪♪

As far away as I can get,
Dawn.

♪♪♪

Bye, Mo.

♪♪♪

[door closes]

[chuckles]

Is that right?
Are you sure?

Hold on a second.

I found Mo.

I didn't turn him in,

but he is off our books
for good.

Signed and predated
before Black--

African-American Monday.

Trust me.
You'll never see Mo again.

Oh, we know.

"We"?

The royal "we."

Like the king's piss.

Okay.

So, do we have a deal?

Partners?

Partners.

♪♪♪

Nice doing business with you,
Hot Coffee.

You too, Half and Half.

Well, Half.

♪♪♪

Do it.

You got it, boss.

[phone dial beeping]

[man] Hello, this is America's
Most Unsolved Crimes hotline.

I found Maurice Monroe
at the South Beach Motor Inn.

I followed his girlfriend
here.

Looks like she did
a real number on him.

Classic femme fatale.

Kind of broad that makes you
want to dig your own grave

and lick the shovel clean.

[man] Your tips are important
to us.

For English, press 1.

God damn it!

- Para Español--
- [phone beeps]

[Dawn]
Wow, Mo-Mo.

This place is fucking paradise.

[Mo]
Not a bad first date, huh?

[Dawn]
First date?

[Mo]
Well, first formal date.

[Dawn] Ha! We've had sex,
like, a hundred times.

[Mo] Yeah, but those were
all at work.

[both laugh]

[Dawn] You're right.
You're right.

- To the Maldives.
- [glasses clink]

- Hey.
- Hm?

To you and me.

♪ romantic music ♪

♪♪♪

- Oh.
- [chuckles]

Giving it up on the first date.

[both laugh]

Oh, Mo-Mo.

♪♪♪

- Mm. Wait, wait.
- What?

Should we go in

before we get sand
all up inside us?

- "Up inside us"?
- [laughs]

[laughing]
Wait a minute.

What are you gonna do to me?

[door creaks open]

I'm fucked.

The coke's gone.

It's at the bottom
of the Atlantic.

And now I owe $1,000,000

to the most violent cartel
in Miami.

They're gonna kill me.

♪ dramatic music ♪

♪♪♪

Fuck that shit, Keith.

We're not going out
without a fight.

- We?
- Yeah.

It's one thing for me
to walk away

from everything I've built,

but it's a whole 'nother
motherfucking thing

for somebody to try to take
that shit.

Tell me everything you know
about this cartel.

♪♪♪

♪♪