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00:00:09,517 --> 00:00:10,965
- So let's talk about the 2011
2
00:00:11,034 --> 00:00:12,724
White House
Correspondents' dinner.
3
00:00:12,793 --> 00:00:14,310
Do you think maybe
you trolled Donald Trump
4
00:00:14,379 --> 00:00:15,448
into running for president?
5
00:00:15,517 --> 00:00:17,172
honestly,
6
00:00:17,241 --> 00:00:18,724
the most memorable part
7
00:00:18,793 --> 00:00:20,827
of that night for me was--
8
00:00:20,896 --> 00:00:23,586
was knowing that the president
had just authorized
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00:00:23,655 --> 00:00:26,310
a secret raid to take out
bin Laden.
10
00:00:26,379 --> 00:00:28,310
And watching all these people
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00:00:28,379 --> 00:00:29,931
who are gonna have
to report on it,
12
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,517
at the break of dawn,
13
00:00:31,586 --> 00:00:35,344
just get wasted.
14
00:00:35,413 --> 00:00:37,517
- I actually remember
that night very, very well.
15
00:00:37,586 --> 00:00:39,724
Um, do you have any plans on
going back to D.C.?
16
00:00:39,793 --> 00:00:43,172
- No, I'm happy doing
the podcast and consulting.
17
00:00:43,241 --> 00:00:45,137
You know, I'm definitely
hoping to find some time
18
00:00:45,206 --> 00:00:47,068
later this year
to write a memoir.
19
00:00:47,137 --> 00:00:49,379
- Kelsey. Lorraine. Peters.
20
00:00:49,448 --> 00:00:52,172
- Lauren, you gotta knock.
- You got onto Yara.
21
00:00:52,241 --> 00:00:55,068
- You got onto Yara!
22
00:00:55,137 --> 00:00:57,137
Dude, it's the dating app
you have to apply for.
23
00:00:57,206 --> 00:00:58,758
- Okay, I--I did not apply.
24
00:00:58,827 --> 00:01:00,137
- Oh, my God,
know me better, please.
25
00:01:00,206 --> 00:01:01,724
Come on.
I applied for you.
26
00:01:01,793 --> 00:01:03,241
Okay, look,
we have Wall Street,
27
00:01:03,310 --> 00:01:05,551
Wall Street, ooh DJ?
- Oh, my God.
28
00:01:05,620 --> 00:01:07,551
This looks like every other
terrible dating app.
29
00:01:09,103 --> 00:01:11,517
- Yo, some of us need
to shower.
30
00:01:11,586 --> 00:01:13,724
- Kelsey got onto Yara.
- Wow.
31
00:01:13,793 --> 00:01:15,793
Wait, wait, this is like Tinder
for the Illuminati, right?
32
00:01:15,862 --> 00:01:17,482
- Yes, and she's acting like
she's too cool for it.
33
00:01:17,551 --> 00:01:19,206
- I am not. I need
ten more minutes to get ready.
34
00:01:19,275 --> 00:01:21,517
- Wait, wait, wait, will you
just swipe a little bit?
35
00:01:21,586 --> 00:01:23,448
Ah.
- Okay, no.
36
00:01:23,517 --> 00:01:26,000
Look at those eyes.
Oh, hi there.
37
00:01:26,965 --> 00:01:29,310
- Uh. Thi--this is Anna.
38
00:01:29,379 --> 00:01:31,517
Kelsey just got onto Yara,
the dating app.
39
00:01:33,034 --> 00:01:35,034
- Yeah.
- That's so cool.
40
00:01:35,103 --> 00:01:36,896
- Okay, okay, I need
to finish getting ready.
41
00:01:36,965 --> 00:01:38,206
- This is going to be
so much fun.
42
00:01:38,275 --> 00:01:40,310
- Oh, it already is!
It's so fun.
43
00:01:40,379 --> 00:01:42,827
- Oh, can I pee,
like, really quick?
44
00:01:47,689 --> 00:01:54,724
♪ ♪
45
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:59,000
- Big news. "People" magazine
wants to do a feature
46
00:01:59,068 --> 00:02:00,586
on "Marriage Vacation."
47
00:02:00,655 --> 00:02:01,758
- Oh, that's so great!
48
00:02:01,827 --> 00:02:02,862
- About Charles and Pauline
49
00:02:02,931 --> 00:02:04,551
getting back together.
50
00:02:04,620 --> 00:02:06,517
- Wow.
- They even want to pay
51
00:02:06,586 --> 00:02:08,689
for a vow renewal ceremony
in Hawaii.
52
00:02:08,758 --> 00:02:12,965
- Oh. My gosh, that's amazing.
53
00:02:13,034 --> 00:02:15,103
- Don't think you'll be going.
- Hm.
54
00:02:15,172 --> 00:02:16,689
- I just heard
about "People" magazine.
55
00:02:16,758 --> 00:02:18,724
- Oh. We are so excited.
56
00:02:18,793 --> 00:02:20,275
- That's not happening.
57
00:02:20,344 --> 00:02:22,586
Pauline and I are
58
00:02:22,655 --> 00:02:24,413
getting a divorce.
59
00:02:24,482 --> 00:02:26,172
- Oh, Charles.
60
00:02:26,241 --> 00:02:28,000
I am so sorry.
61
00:02:29,344 --> 00:02:31,448
Uh, what are we going to do
about the book tour?
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00:02:31,517 --> 00:02:32,965
It starts tomorrow.
63
00:02:33,034 --> 00:02:35,241
- Everything goes forward
as planned.
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00:02:35,310 --> 00:02:36,586
I was never part
of the publicity.
65
00:02:36,655 --> 00:02:38,862
- Not officially, but the book
66
00:02:38,931 --> 00:02:40,586
has been gaining momentum
because people thought
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00:02:40,655 --> 00:02:42,551
it resulted in the author
and her husband
68
00:02:42,620 --> 00:02:44,620
getting back together.
69
00:02:44,689 --> 00:02:47,103
- I don't know
what to say, Diana.
70
00:02:47,172 --> 00:02:50,517
I'm not going to live my life
to fit the novel.
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00:02:54,034 --> 00:02:55,896
- ♪ They say I'm no good ♪
72
00:02:55,965 --> 00:02:58,172
♪ But I've never been better ♪
73
00:02:58,241 --> 00:03:01,068
♪ No, I've never been better ♪
74
00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:06,827
♪ I don't ever want
to waste my time ♪
75
00:03:06,896 --> 00:03:08,000
♪ Again ♪
76
00:03:08,068 --> 00:03:09,310
♪ ♪
77
00:03:09,379 --> 00:03:12,827
♪ Don't you know how hard ♪
78
00:03:12,896 --> 00:03:15,103
♪ I try ♪
79
00:03:15,172 --> 00:03:17,724
- So Obama's former
speechwriter, Jake Devereux,
80
00:03:17,793 --> 00:03:19,655
is making the rounds
with a memoir,
81
00:03:19,724 --> 00:03:21,827
and I think it would be great
"get" for Millennial.
82
00:03:21,896 --> 00:03:24,000
- Or Empirical. Now, I've been
planning on going
83
00:03:24,068 --> 00:03:25,517
after Devereux for weeks.
84
00:03:25,586 --> 00:03:27,275
- Who doesn't love a
planner, but I actually
85
00:03:27,344 --> 00:03:29,172
have a meeting set with him
tomorrow in D.C.
86
00:03:29,241 --> 00:03:31,965
- So do I. Maybe you should
think about cancelling yours.
87
00:03:32,034 --> 00:03:33,310
- Work together.
88
00:03:33,379 --> 00:03:34,689
Jake Devereux's book
will be big.
89
00:03:34,758 --> 00:03:35,931
So whoever gets him,
90
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:37,620
it'll be a win
for the company.
91
00:03:40,689 --> 00:03:43,034
♪ ♪
92
00:03:43,103 --> 00:03:45,137
- And I mean, can you
believe this timing?
93
00:03:45,206 --> 00:03:46,827
Just as the book
about our marriage comes out,
94
00:03:46,896 --> 00:03:47,965
he wants a divorce.
95
00:03:49,758 --> 00:03:52,137
- I don't know.
I guess.
96
00:03:52,206 --> 00:03:54,310
I'm mostly just focused
on how everyone else
97
00:03:54,379 --> 00:03:55,793
is going to react to the news.
98
00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:57,517
The girls, you two,
99
00:03:57,586 --> 00:03:59,241
everyone who's gonna come
hear me read.
100
00:03:59,310 --> 00:04:00,379
- It's none of their business.
101
00:04:00,448 --> 00:04:01,689
- I made it their business.
102
00:04:01,758 --> 00:04:03,034
People are gonna
want to know
103
00:04:03,103 --> 00:04:05,034
how's the real life
Kate and Karl?
104
00:04:05,103 --> 00:04:07,724
- Say they're doing great.
Never been better.
105
00:04:09,620 --> 00:04:11,517
- Postpone the truth.
106
00:04:11,586 --> 00:04:12,862
At least until you make
107
00:04:12,931 --> 00:04:14,862
the "New York Times"
Best Seller List.
108
00:04:19,758 --> 00:04:21,034
♪ ♪
109
00:04:21,103 --> 00:04:23,689
- I, uh...
110
00:04:23,758 --> 00:04:27,379
I think, once you've
created a story,
111
00:04:27,448 --> 00:04:30,034
other people want to believe it
as much as you do.
112
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:34,034
- So true. Honesty can be
very self-indulgent.
113
00:04:34,103 --> 00:04:35,862
- I don't know.
I'm a terrible liar.
114
00:04:35,931 --> 00:04:37,965
- Just talk about your
relationship when it was good.
115
00:04:38,034 --> 00:04:40,379
It's really just a lie
of verb tenses.
116
00:04:40,448 --> 00:04:41,724
We could practice.
117
00:04:42,896 --> 00:04:44,206
- Okay.
118
00:04:44,275 --> 00:04:46,862
Uh, let's see.
When it was good...
119
00:04:46,931 --> 00:04:48,965
Ah, this is gonna make me sad.
120
00:04:50,448 --> 00:04:51,793
Well...
121
00:04:52,758 --> 00:04:55,034
He used to write me these--
122
00:04:55,103 --> 00:04:58,310
He...writes me
123
00:04:58,379 --> 00:05:00,689
these little love poems
on sticky notes
124
00:05:00,758 --> 00:05:02,241
and puts them
in the book I'm reading.
125
00:05:02,310 --> 00:05:03,551
- That's a good one.
126
00:05:03,620 --> 00:05:04,724
Yeah.
127
00:05:04,793 --> 00:05:06,931
And when we go to the country
128
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,689
in the summer
129
00:05:08,758 --> 00:05:11,034
we always make love outside.
130
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:12,586
Aw.
131
00:05:12,655 --> 00:05:14,965
- And now we're never going to
make love again.
132
00:05:15,034 --> 00:05:17,137
- That's enough.
Very, very good.
133
00:05:17,206 --> 00:05:19,068
- You probably don't need
to get that detailed.
134
00:05:19,137 --> 00:05:20,896
- The bottle.
135
00:05:23,965 --> 00:05:30,551
♪ ♪
136
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,000
- Hi.
137
00:05:34,517 --> 00:05:36,068
How are you?
138
00:05:36,137 --> 00:05:38,793
- Um. I'm, uh--I'm fine.
139
00:05:38,862 --> 00:05:42,275
- I was, um, surprised to hear
about you and Pauline.
140
00:05:42,344 --> 00:05:45,551
I guess maybe I thought
it was working out.
141
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:49,344
This must be really tough
on you and the girls.
142
00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:52,448
- Actually, it has been tough.
143
00:05:53,827 --> 00:05:56,206
- Anytime you need me,
I'm here.
144
00:05:56,275 --> 00:06:00,137
Uh, I mean, not here here.
I know this isn't a good place.
145
00:06:00,206 --> 00:06:02,655
- Uh, yeah.
Yeah, it's not.
146
00:06:02,724 --> 00:06:06,793
How about we get together
after Pauline's book tour?
147
00:06:06,862 --> 00:06:10,793
There is a lot that I want
to talk to you about.
148
00:06:10,862 --> 00:06:12,310
- Of course.
149
00:06:13,620 --> 00:06:15,000
I look forward to it.
150
00:06:26,103 --> 00:06:28,344
♪ ♪
151
00:06:28,413 --> 00:06:30,689
- "And that night
at the dinner table
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00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:32,827
"in front of the kids,
153
00:06:32,896 --> 00:06:34,931
"he took my hand,
154
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:39,103
"and for the second time
in our relationship,
155
00:06:39,172 --> 00:06:40,827
he proposed."
156
00:06:47,551 --> 00:06:49,137
- Thank you, Pauline.
157
00:06:49,206 --> 00:06:50,862
What a special treat for us
158
00:06:50,931 --> 00:06:52,655
having you hear
at Temple Israel.
159
00:06:52,724 --> 00:06:54,551
- Well, thank you so much
for having me.
160
00:06:54,620 --> 00:06:57,379
- Ooh, I see a lot
of familiar faces in the crowd
161
00:06:57,448 --> 00:07:00,310
who can't wait to get up
and ask questions.
162
00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:03,275
Please, queue up
at the microphone.
163
00:07:03,344 --> 00:07:04,517
- Ooh.
164
00:07:04,586 --> 00:07:06,000
- Goodness.
165
00:07:07,310 --> 00:07:09,896
- Hi, Pauline. Fern Hirsch.
- Hi, Fern.
166
00:07:09,965 --> 00:07:11,896
- Can you talk a little bit
about the process?
167
00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,758
- No.
168
00:07:13,827 --> 00:07:17,172
The process of getting back
together with your husband.
169
00:07:17,241 --> 00:07:18,931
- Oh, um.
170
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,379
- Smile.
- I am.
171
00:07:21,448 --> 00:07:22,931
- Um.
172
00:07:25,482 --> 00:07:26,896
Um.
173
00:07:26,965 --> 00:07:28,655
You know,
174
00:07:28,724 --> 00:07:30,379
working together
brought us closer.
175
00:07:30,448 --> 00:07:33,896
I think we were able to really
176
00:07:33,965 --> 00:07:36,551
rediscover ourselves
as partners.
177
00:07:36,620 --> 00:07:37,655
- You didn't seem
like strangers
178
00:07:37,724 --> 00:07:38,724
after all of that time apart?
179
00:07:38,793 --> 00:07:39,862
I know I would.
180
00:07:39,931 --> 00:07:41,620
- Suddenly it's the Fern show.
181
00:07:41,689 --> 00:07:45,034
- You know, sometimes sex
is better with a stranger.
182
00:07:52,241 --> 00:07:53,482
- I think she'll be better
one-on-one.
183
00:07:53,551 --> 00:07:55,172
- She has to be.
184
00:07:55,241 --> 00:07:57,172
- Pauline Turner Brooks,
185
00:07:57,241 --> 00:07:58,931
thank you for being
on Bookworm.
186
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,172
- Thank you, Michael,
and I'm so sorry
187
00:08:01,241 --> 00:08:03,379
I couldn't join you in LA.
- As am I.
188
00:08:03,448 --> 00:08:06,724
Well let's jump right in.
What a story.
189
00:08:06,793 --> 00:08:08,793
It's like fiction
meets memoir.
190
00:08:08,862 --> 00:08:12,137
- Yes.
Yes, but mostly fiction.
191
00:08:12,206 --> 00:08:15,379
- Well, the way you talk
about your husband
192
00:08:15,448 --> 00:08:17,689
and your life together
193
00:08:17,758 --> 00:08:20,310
they say that God
is in the details.
194
00:08:20,379 --> 00:08:22,931
- Or the devil,
depending on who you ask.
195
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:27,965
- Well may I ask, how is
your real
196
00:08:28,034 --> 00:08:29,758
- You just did.
- We knew he would.
197
00:08:29,827 --> 00:08:31,275
- Oh.
198
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:32,931
It's...
199
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,034
Um.
200
00:08:35,103 --> 00:08:36,620
It's, uh--
201
00:08:36,689 --> 00:08:38,793
- Land the plane,
land the plane.
202
00:08:38,862 --> 00:08:40,758
- It's...good.
203
00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,344
It's really good.
204
00:08:43,413 --> 00:08:45,034
- Okay, I think she's got this.
205
00:08:45,103 --> 00:08:46,482
- You wrote in your book
206
00:08:46,551 --> 00:08:48,620
that your sex life had become
207
00:08:48,689 --> 00:08:50,689
routine but serviceable
208
00:08:50,758 --> 00:08:55,724
like the many Italian bistros
on the Upper East Side.
209
00:08:55,793 --> 00:08:59,275
What kind of restaurant would
you say your sex life
210
00:08:59,344 --> 00:09:01,655
is like now
since the "vacation"?
211
00:09:02,655 --> 00:09:04,379
- Well...
212
00:09:04,448 --> 00:09:06,379
It's hot.
213
00:09:06,448 --> 00:09:08,655
So...
214
00:09:08,724 --> 00:09:10,551
Thai, I guess?
215
00:09:10,620 --> 00:09:12,310
Or, um, Korean barbecue?
216
00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:16,000
We have a hot
217
00:09:16,068 --> 00:09:19,827
Korean barbecue sex
and it's just so...
218
00:09:19,896 --> 00:09:22,068
So...
219
00:09:22,965 --> 00:09:25,655
Spicy.
220
00:09:29,965 --> 00:09:31,931
♪ ♪
221
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,241
- So there's so many people--
Brad Pitt, George Clooney,
222
00:09:34,310 --> 00:09:35,931
Leonardo DiCaprio--
223
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:39,896
and these guys, they are
really good at basketball.
224
00:09:39,965 --> 00:09:43,103
But none of them have the guts
to guard the president.
225
00:09:43,172 --> 00:09:44,724
So I have to.
226
00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:46,448
- And I'm...
227
00:09:46,517 --> 00:09:48,448
you know, terrible.
228
00:09:48,517 --> 00:09:51,344
They called me "All-Day"
because that's how long
229
00:09:51,413 --> 00:09:52,862
the president could
score on me.
230
00:09:55,103 --> 00:09:56,448
- Aw, that still
had to be fun though.
231
00:09:56,517 --> 00:09:58,965
- Imagine all your heroes
laughing at you.
232
00:09:59,034 --> 00:10:01,551
- Come on, it didn't bruise
your reputation too bad.
233
00:10:01,620 --> 00:10:04,068
I've seen the pictures of you
hanging out with movie stars.
234
00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:05,517
- Yeah, even dating a couple.
235
00:10:05,586 --> 00:10:07,551
- Definitely not putting
that in the book.
236
00:10:07,620 --> 00:10:10,241
- Well, even if you don't,
though I think you should,
237
00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:12,000
your book is gonna be
a best seller.
238
00:10:12,068 --> 00:10:13,551
- Yes.
239
00:10:13,620 --> 00:10:15,310
You just have to publish
with the right place.
240
00:10:15,379 --> 00:10:16,482
And, of course,
that's Empirical.
241
00:10:16,551 --> 00:10:18,137
- Or Millennial.
242
00:10:18,206 --> 00:10:20,724
We have a great track record.
243
00:10:20,793 --> 00:10:23,689
Our goal is to publish authors
with original voices.
244
00:10:23,758 --> 00:10:25,586
We also just signed
a first-look deal
245
00:10:25,655 --> 00:10:27,793
with Reese Witherspoon's
production company,
246
00:10:27,862 --> 00:10:30,413
which puts us
in a very unique position.
247
00:10:30,482 --> 00:10:32,655
- And one of the benefits
of going with Empirical
248
00:10:32,724 --> 00:10:34,310
there is no big, splashy,
249
00:10:34,379 --> 00:10:36,344
female-focused production
company attached.
250
00:10:36,413 --> 00:10:38,758
So you can shop your book
around anywhere you want.
251
00:10:38,827 --> 00:10:40,620
And you can keep
all the money for yourself.
252
00:10:40,689 --> 00:10:42,448
- Either way you go,
253
00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:43,724
you'll make a great choice.
254
00:10:43,793 --> 00:10:45,689
- ♪ Oh, darling ♪
255
00:10:45,758 --> 00:10:48,413
♪ Don't you see how it is ♪
256
00:10:48,482 --> 00:10:50,827
- You killed that.
- Thank you.
257
00:10:50,896 --> 00:10:52,689
You didn't do so bad yourself.
258
00:10:52,758 --> 00:10:55,793
- Mm, but you know
he's gonna go with me, right?
259
00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:59,241
You know what?
I love your confidence.
260
00:10:59,310 --> 00:11:01,655
Sometimes it's even sexy.
261
00:11:03,482 --> 00:11:05,310
Sometimes.
262
00:11:05,379 --> 00:11:08,310
♪ There's a sensation ♪
263
00:11:08,379 --> 00:11:10,620
♪ In my bones ♪
264
00:11:10,689 --> 00:11:14,241
Can I do half regular
and half sweet potato?
265
00:11:14,310 --> 00:11:16,758
Great. Thank you.
266
00:11:21,482 --> 00:11:24,241
♪ It's a savage dream into ♪
267
00:11:24,310 --> 00:11:26,862
♪ To which I fell ♪
268
00:11:26,931 --> 00:11:30,241
♪ I catch my breath ♪
269
00:11:30,310 --> 00:11:32,931
♪ As I lose my hold ♪
270
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:37,724
♪ Tumble down the well
of no self-control ♪
271
00:11:37,793 --> 00:11:42,379
♪ You stole my pulse
yet it beats for you ♪
272
00:11:42,448 --> 00:11:45,241
♪ My sanity escapes me ♪
273
00:11:45,310 --> 00:11:48,413
♪ In this love so true ♪
274
00:11:48,482 --> 00:11:53,620
♪ I love the way ♪
275
00:11:53,689 --> 00:11:56,379
♪ You haunt me, darling ♪
276
00:11:56,448 --> 00:11:59,310
♪ I want you, darling ♪
277
00:11:59,379 --> 00:12:04,689
♪ I love the way ♪
278
00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:07,310
♪ You haunt me, darling ♪
279
00:12:07,379 --> 00:12:10,000
♪ I want you, darling ♪
280
00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:13,758
- Yeah, later.
281
00:12:13,827 --> 00:12:16,034
- Thanks, again.
- Oh, you're welcome.
282
00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:17,620
Bye.
283
00:12:19,689 --> 00:12:21,965
- Yeah, Josh, y'girl was loose
284
00:12:22,034 --> 00:12:23,896
in the house and asked
to borrow some eyeliner.
285
00:12:23,965 --> 00:12:25,310
Let me tell you something
about the eyes.
286
00:12:25,379 --> 00:12:26,896
They are the window
to the soul.
287
00:12:26,965 --> 00:12:28,827
They are also the doorway
to disease and infection.
288
00:12:28,896 --> 00:12:30,482
- You didn't have to
let her use it.
289
00:12:30,551 --> 00:12:31,862
- I shouldn't have been
asked, dude.
290
00:12:31,931 --> 00:12:33,344
We're all living
in this tiny apartment.
291
00:12:33,413 --> 00:12:35,172
Can we please just set
some ground rules
292
00:12:35,241 --> 00:12:37,310
about bringing people home?
- Okay, okay, fine.
293
00:12:37,379 --> 00:12:39,344
Yes. Can we do it
over food though?
294
00:12:39,413 --> 00:12:41,241
I'm starving.
- Thought you'd never ask.
295
00:12:41,310 --> 00:12:42,620
Let's go.
296
00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:46,344
All right,
you have to walk them
297
00:12:46,413 --> 00:12:48,344
to and from
the front door, okay?
298
00:12:48,413 --> 00:12:51,448
No roamers, no moaners,
no giving out the Wi-Fi code.
299
00:12:51,517 --> 00:12:53,172
Oh, and they can have coffee,
but they may not
300
00:12:53,241 --> 00:12:55,172
have the cold brew.
- Okay, calm down.
301
00:12:55,241 --> 00:12:57,482
I just got out
of a terrible break up.
302
00:12:57,551 --> 00:12:59,137
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm gonna be having
303
00:12:59,206 --> 00:13:01,655
a lot of sex.
That's just what you do.
304
00:13:01,724 --> 00:13:03,620
- Some people journal
furiously about how
305
00:13:03,689 --> 00:13:05,103
they wish they're
relationship had ended,
306
00:13:05,172 --> 00:13:07,068
and then they find
a surrogate relationship
307
00:13:07,137 --> 00:13:08,931
where they can re-create
the break-up on their terms.
308
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,655
You know, I'm just saying
everybody's different.
309
00:13:10,724 --> 00:13:13,413
- Okay, I ju--I need
to break this pattern.
310
00:13:13,482 --> 00:13:16,310
All right? I want to be the guy
that's into random hook-ups,
311
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:18,862
not the guy who just keeps
falling in love with everyone.
312
00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:22,000
- Josh, that is like me saying
I want to be athletic.
313
00:13:22,068 --> 00:13:24,586
Okay? I'm serious.
You're a born romantic, dude.
314
00:13:24,655 --> 00:13:26,034
There's nothing you
can do to change that.
315
00:13:26,103 --> 00:13:27,931
I need to change it.
316
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:29,379
I just keep getting hurt.
317
00:13:29,448 --> 00:13:30,827
Love just doesn't work for me.
318
00:13:30,896 --> 00:13:32,758
- No, but it will.
Okay, listen.
319
00:13:32,827 --> 00:13:34,724
You are gonna meet
that perfect person,
320
00:13:34,793 --> 00:13:36,551
and it is all gonna click.
321
00:13:38,827 --> 00:13:41,206
What if it's Liza?
322
00:13:41,275 --> 00:13:44,310
- Listen, if you and Liza
are meant to be together,
323
00:13:44,379 --> 00:13:45,931
nothing can keep you apart.
324
00:13:49,137 --> 00:13:50,379
- Yeah.
325
00:13:51,275 --> 00:13:54,034
- Out of all the people
I could have met on Yara--
326
00:13:54,103 --> 00:13:56,241
- I know. I was surprised
to see your profile.
327
00:13:56,310 --> 00:13:59,137
And to learn you're interested
in men and women.
328
00:14:01,793 --> 00:14:04,000
My friend Lauren applied
for me.
329
00:14:04,068 --> 00:14:05,793
- Mm.
- Clearly she's more interested
330
00:14:05,862 --> 00:14:07,137
in meeting people for herself.
331
00:14:07,206 --> 00:14:09,034
- Uh-huh, sure.
332
00:14:26,517 --> 00:14:28,517
I'll be right back.
- No rush.
333
00:14:44,896 --> 00:14:48,103
♪ ♪
334
00:14:51,241 --> 00:14:52,586
- Good morning.
335
00:14:52,655 --> 00:14:54,241
- Good morning.
336
00:14:57,758 --> 00:14:59,241
Um.
337
00:14:59,310 --> 00:15:01,068
There are bagels in the lobby.
338
00:15:01,137 --> 00:15:03,758
- Yeah, I'm good.
I'm actually meeting somebody.
339
00:15:04,724 --> 00:15:06,586
- Me too.
340
00:15:06,655 --> 00:15:07,724
- Hey, guys.
341
00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:09,206
- Hey.
- Hi, Jake.
342
00:15:09,275 --> 00:15:10,586
- Sorry, I can't stay
for breakfast.
343
00:15:10,655 --> 00:15:12,758
I'm doing HuffPo Live
in an hour.
344
00:15:12,827 --> 00:15:15,931
Um, so, look,
I was really impressed
345
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,448
with what you guys had to say,
and I know the importance
346
00:15:18,517 --> 00:15:20,448
of surrounding yourself
with smart people
347
00:15:20,517 --> 00:15:23,724
so I decided that I would like
to work with you.
348
00:15:23,793 --> 00:15:26,206
- Both of you.
349
00:15:28,206 --> 00:15:29,551
Can we do that?
350
00:15:32,172 --> 00:15:35,344
- There are a few reasons.
351
00:15:35,413 --> 00:15:39,344
But we can figure that out.
- Okay, fantastic.
352
00:15:39,413 --> 00:15:41,000
I feel really good about this.
353
00:15:41,068 --> 00:15:42,551
- Good.
- I'm glad.
354
00:15:42,620 --> 00:15:45,758
- Great, so my lawyer
will be in touch.
355
00:15:45,827 --> 00:15:49,137
And I'm super excited,
so I'll see ya.
356
00:15:50,655 --> 00:15:52,206
- Hey, Jake.
357
00:15:52,275 --> 00:15:53,586
Are you sure?
358
00:15:53,655 --> 00:15:56,103
You know, sometimes
three's a crowd.
359
00:15:56,172 --> 00:15:58,241
- I mean one thing
no other publishing house
360
00:15:58,310 --> 00:15:59,586
is offering is
two amazing editors.
361
00:15:59,655 --> 00:16:01,862
I'm a first-time author.
362
00:16:01,931 --> 00:16:04,275
I need all the help I can get.
363
00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:05,379
- Okay.
364
00:16:06,896 --> 00:16:08,379
Oh, um,
365
00:16:08,448 --> 00:16:09,931
I saw you on Yara.
366
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:13,310
Yeah, I saw you too.
367
00:16:16,379 --> 00:16:22,000
♪ ♪
368
00:16:33,551 --> 00:16:34,620
Pauline is unhinged.
369
00:16:34,689 --> 00:16:35,965
She cries every time
370
00:16:36,034 --> 00:16:38,448
she's asked
about your relationship.
371
00:16:38,517 --> 00:16:39,689
- Ah.
372
00:16:39,758 --> 00:16:41,206
I knew that talking about
373
00:16:41,275 --> 00:16:44,275
the break up would
be hard, but this--
374
00:16:44,344 --> 00:16:45,931
This, uh...
375
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,620
That is truly unexpected.
376
00:16:47,689 --> 00:16:51,620
- Uh, she's actually telling
people that, um,
377
00:16:51,689 --> 00:16:53,000
that you're still together.
378
00:16:53,068 --> 00:16:55,000
I thought it might be
a bad idea, but
379
00:16:55,068 --> 00:16:58,655
it's so hard to push back
with such raw subject matter.
380
00:16:58,724 --> 00:17:02,586
- It's not your fault.
This is uncharted territory.
381
00:17:02,655 --> 00:17:03,931
- Ugh, I had such high hopes.
382
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,413
- Well, this book
383
00:17:06,482 --> 00:17:09,344
may not be what the company
hoped it would be.
384
00:17:09,413 --> 00:17:13,551
- It's definitely not what
Pauline hoped it would be.
385
00:17:13,620 --> 00:17:15,275
- Yeah.
386
00:17:15,344 --> 00:17:19,103
I'm sorry, Diana,
for making your job harder.
387
00:17:20,758 --> 00:17:24,965
- Charles, maybe you
should go tonight in my place.
388
00:17:25,034 --> 00:17:28,206
- Wouldn't that just support
this fallacy?
389
00:17:28,275 --> 00:17:29,931
- You're not supporting
her lie.
390
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,068
You're supporting her.
391
00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:42,137
♪ ♪
392
00:17:43,827 --> 00:17:45,827
- Liza, sorry I'm late.
- Hi, it's okay.
393
00:17:45,896 --> 00:17:48,827
How are you feeling?
- Ah, nervous.
394
00:17:48,896 --> 00:17:50,379
- All right, well I'm gonna
talk to moderator
395
00:17:50,448 --> 00:17:51,620
before the Q&A starts.
396
00:17:51,689 --> 00:17:52,758
Hopefully I can
get him to stick
397
00:17:52,827 --> 00:17:54,068
to questions
about the novel.
398
00:17:54,137 --> 00:17:55,896
You know you'd think
399
00:17:55,965 --> 00:17:57,620
the lying would get easier,
400
00:17:57,689 --> 00:17:59,689
but the more it accumulates
the harder it gets.
401
00:17:59,758 --> 00:18:01,172
Yeah.
402
00:18:01,241 --> 00:18:03,172
Believe what you're saying
is true.
403
00:18:03,241 --> 00:18:05,482
Keep your answers short,
and remember, these people
404
00:18:05,551 --> 00:18:07,448
are here because
you gave them hope.
405
00:18:07,517 --> 00:18:09,517
- Yep, false hope.
406
00:18:09,586 --> 00:18:11,517
- Hope that they could have
the lives they wanted.
407
00:18:11,586 --> 00:18:14,344
It doesn't necessarily mean
saving their marriage.
408
00:18:14,413 --> 00:18:16,103
That can mean anything.
409
00:18:16,172 --> 00:18:19,068
- Okay.
Thanks, Liza.
410
00:18:23,862 --> 00:18:25,827
"It was a Tuesday.
411
00:18:25,896 --> 00:18:28,862
"Corina had piano lessons
and Jamie had ballet.
412
00:18:28,931 --> 00:18:33,103
"I was back in the routine,
and it felt like I never left.
413
00:18:33,172 --> 00:18:34,931
The one difference was..."
- Hey.
414
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,206
No statements
and no two-part questions.
415
00:18:37,275 --> 00:18:38,655
And try not to pick
someone who came here
416
00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:40,000
for advice on their love life.
417
00:18:40,068 --> 00:18:41,275
- How am I supposed
to know that?
418
00:18:41,344 --> 00:18:42,655
- Oh, you can tell.
419
00:18:42,724 --> 00:18:44,551
- "And that night
at the dinner table
420
00:18:44,620 --> 00:18:46,137
"in front of the kids,
421
00:18:46,206 --> 00:18:47,758
"he took my hand,
422
00:18:47,827 --> 00:18:51,103
"and for the second time
in our relationship,
423
00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:52,793
he proposed."
424
00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:00,206
Thank you.
425
00:19:00,275 --> 00:19:02,275
- Thank you, Pauline.
426
00:19:02,344 --> 00:19:04,758
Now we'll take some questions
from the audience.
427
00:19:04,827 --> 00:19:06,172
- Oh, no, too eager.
Keep going.
428
00:19:06,241 --> 00:19:08,724
- Yes, over here on the right.
429
00:19:08,793 --> 00:19:10,068
- Mm-mm.
430
00:19:11,413 --> 00:19:13,241
- Hi, Pauline.
431
00:19:13,310 --> 00:19:15,172
Beth.
- Hi, Beth.
432
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:16,793
- Love your book.
433
00:19:16,862 --> 00:19:18,206
- Aw, thank you.
434
00:19:18,275 --> 00:19:19,862
- I have a personal question.
435
00:19:19,931 --> 00:19:21,413
- Oh, of course you do.
436
00:19:21,482 --> 00:19:23,000
- How's it working between you
437
00:19:23,068 --> 00:19:24,758
and the real
438
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,206
- Um, it's...
439
00:19:29,275 --> 00:19:31,482
It's
440
00:19:31,551 --> 00:19:33,206
Well, the truth is--
441
00:19:36,310 --> 00:19:40,344
♪ ♪
442
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:42,862
The truth is
443
00:19:42,931 --> 00:19:45,172
my marriage was over
before I left.
444
00:19:46,586 --> 00:19:49,068
And no matter what I did,
445
00:19:49,137 --> 00:19:50,793
no matter what he did,
446
00:19:50,862 --> 00:19:52,482
it wasn't gonna get fixed.
447
00:19:55,586 --> 00:19:58,034
This story is a fantasy.
448
00:19:58,103 --> 00:20:00,620
It's how I imagined it
for the couple in the book
449
00:20:00,689 --> 00:20:03,344
because I like happy endings.
450
00:20:03,413 --> 00:20:05,344
But for me,
451
00:20:05,413 --> 00:20:09,275
my story isn't over.
452
00:20:09,344 --> 00:20:12,068
And my happy ending
is still out there.
453
00:20:17,586 --> 00:20:19,241
Thank you.
454
00:20:24,241 --> 00:20:26,241
- Okay, next question.
455
00:20:31,275 --> 00:20:32,896
- Charles, hi.
- Hi.
456
00:20:32,965 --> 00:20:34,551
- I didn't know you were
going to be here tonight.
457
00:20:34,620 --> 00:20:37,586
- I heard that Pauline
was having a hard time.
458
00:20:37,655 --> 00:20:39,896
And I assumed that lying
was your idea?
459
00:20:41,206 --> 00:20:42,586
- Charles.
460
00:20:43,724 --> 00:20:45,586
Hi.
- Hi.
461
00:20:45,655 --> 00:20:48,172
- I'm glad you came.
- Me too.
462
00:20:48,241 --> 00:20:51,379
And I know that was hard,
but...
463
00:20:51,448 --> 00:20:54,655
being honest was
the right thing to do.
464
00:20:57,241 --> 00:20:59,379
Well, I mean,
I wasn't truly honest.
465
00:20:59,448 --> 00:21:02,206
If I had been,
I would have said
466
00:21:02,275 --> 00:21:05,241
that it was your career
and your ambition
467
00:21:05,310 --> 00:21:07,275
that ruined our marriage,
not mine.
468
00:21:07,344 --> 00:21:10,965
And that when we got married,
I thought we'd be a team.
469
00:21:11,034 --> 00:21:12,758
Right away it was
all about you.
470
00:21:12,827 --> 00:21:15,827
I was just there
to be your rock.
471
00:21:15,896 --> 00:21:18,137
And you never noticed
how unhappy I was
472
00:21:18,206 --> 00:21:21,000
because you didn't want to.
473
00:21:23,172 --> 00:21:25,896
- I'm sorry, Pauline.
474
00:21:25,965 --> 00:21:27,413
I really am.
475
00:21:27,482 --> 00:21:28,931
And you're right.
476
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:32,344
Sometimes I am blind
477
00:21:32,413 --> 00:21:34,551
to what's right in front of me.
478
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:42,482
- Charles.
479
00:21:54,620 --> 00:21:55,827
- ♪ We were born ♪
480
00:21:55,896 --> 00:21:57,655
♪ In summertime light ♪
481
00:21:57,724 --> 00:21:59,655
- Charles.
482
00:21:59,724 --> 00:22:02,241
Charles. Wait.
483
00:22:07,517 --> 00:22:09,931
[Opus Orange's
"Artificial Heart"]
484
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,172
- I think if you're asking,
you probably know.
485
00:22:12,241 --> 00:22:14,310
- I thought I did.
486
00:22:14,379 --> 00:22:17,379
- I'm just a woman who lied
about her age to get a job.
487
00:22:17,448 --> 00:22:19,068
♪ ♪
488
00:22:19,137 --> 00:22:21,758
How long have you--
- It doesn't matter.
489
00:22:21,827 --> 00:22:24,275
What else did you lie about?
- Let me explain.
490
00:22:24,344 --> 00:22:27,206
- You betrayed me.
491
00:22:27,275 --> 00:22:31,931
You looked me in the eyes
for months and months,
492
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:35,793
and you pretended to be
somebody else entirely.
493
00:22:35,862 --> 00:22:39,551
You are not the kind of person
that I want to have in my life.
494
00:22:39,620 --> 00:22:43,689
Unfortunately this company will
not survive another scandal.
495
00:22:43,758 --> 00:22:45,413
So from now on
496
00:22:45,482 --> 00:22:49,275
we have a professional,
reporting relationship.
497
00:22:49,344 --> 00:22:51,965
- Maybe it would be better
if I just left.
498
00:22:55,793 --> 00:22:58,206
- I thought you did
all this to get a job.
499
00:22:58,275 --> 00:23:03,034
♪ You took a hammer
to my artificial heart ♪
500
00:23:03,103 --> 00:23:05,689
♪ My walls fell down ♪
501
00:23:05,758 --> 00:23:08,241
♪ You've broken through ♪
33460
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