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CDC)
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ii
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Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
11
00:01:49,055 --> 00:01:51,535
How many stars
sparkle in the sky?
12
00:01:51,925 --> 00:01:54,371
Ever tried counting them?
13
00:01:54,828 --> 00:02:02,303
It would take 6,000 years to
count those in our galaxy alone
14
00:02:02,803 --> 00:02:04,942
How many such galaxies exist?
15
00:02:05,338 --> 00:02:08,979
Scientists reckon
two billion more
16
00:02:09,476 --> 00:02:14,721
Isn't it possible that amongst
these billions of celestial bodies
17
00:02:14,981 --> 00:02:18,485
a planet with people
like us exists?
18
00:02:18,819 --> 00:02:22,596
As we explore space
looking for them,
19
00:02:22,856 --> 00:02:27,305
couldn't they be coming here,
looking for us?
20
00:04:27,781 --> 00:04:32,781
Hindi pop SONG
21
00:06:16,790 --> 00:06:21,330
What the thief stole was the
gadget to recall his spaceship
22
00:06:21,494 --> 00:06:24,998
Without this remote
he could not return home
23
00:06:25,432 --> 00:06:29,778
He neither knew our language,
nor had a friend here
24
00:06:30,003 --> 00:06:33,974
Alone, anguished,
his only thought was...
25
00:06:34,441 --> 00:06:36,352
...how will I return home?
26
00:06:59,032 --> 00:07:04,243
On the pathway of Time
Life is but a brief flame
27
00:07:05,238 --> 00:07:10,312
In its luminous mist
We wish, we dream, we exist
28
00:07:10,777 --> 00:07:13,553
But on a beautiful bend
29
00:07:13,847 --> 00:07:16,589
A stranger may we meet
30
00:07:16,783 --> 00:07:19,821
Life after life
31
00:07:19,986 --> 00:07:23,263
Whose memory may persist
32
00:07:42,275 --> 00:07:44,016
Extra ticket.
Anyone extra ticket?
33
00:07:44,277 --> 00:07:46,484
- Yes sir...
- I'll take it!
34
00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:48,953
Sorry, I raised my hand first
35
00:07:49,015 --> 00:07:51,791
But I called out first
36
00:07:51,918 --> 00:07:54,899
I'm a big fan of
Mr Bachchan, the poet
37
00:07:54,954 --> 00:07:57,730
rmlhfiurhldllnaon,
lhondor
38
00:07:57,991 --> 00:08:00,801
Flllllulllunnmumw...
“fiwumnhul
39
00:08:01,227 --> 00:08:04,231
From age five, I know his son's
dialogues - without memorizing
40
00:08:04,264 --> 00:08:05,971
Hello, who wants it?
41
00:08:06,366 --> 00:08:08,710
Gwomo.
Pouhybnotlloupdlnn
42
00:08:08,968 --> 00:08:10,276
€1OO
43
00:08:10,703 --> 00:08:14,241
€1OO for a €4O ticket?
Black market of poetry!
44
00:08:14,374 --> 00:08:16,445
Six loinlgufigigsufigzor this
45
00:08:16,676 --> 00:08:17,916
Time is money
46
00:08:24,884 --> 00:08:29,731
- Go for the dialogues.
- All yours. Ladies first
47
00:08:30,790 --> 00:08:33,532
I IQ “llifi?
48
00:08:33,793 --> 00:08:40,574
1st half you enjoy the poetry.
2nd half I'll savor the acting
49
00:08:41,868 --> 00:08:44,280
That's a damn good idea!
50
00:08:46,539 --> 00:08:48,348
10, N, N, II
51
00:08:48,408 --> 00:08:49,011
50 more
52
00:08:49,943 --> 00:08:50,978
-96
-96
53
00:08:52,779 --> 00:08:56,317
€96. How about a discount?
We're from the same countn/
54
00:08:56,449 --> 00:08:58,588
Hail India, bro!
55
00:08:58,651 --> 00:09:01,723
LIQIIUIIQHDH
MN
56
00:09:03,723 --> 00:09:05,930
Extra ticket.
Anyone extra ticket?
57
00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:08,338
Sir!
58
00:09:08,795 --> 00:09:11,241
Ca“ 'PTZZZZ'? a'?
59
00:09:11,431 --> 00:09:13,968
Keep my watch till I repay
60
00:09:14,234 --> 00:09:16,305
Please, Sir,
it's the last ticket
61
00:09:16,469 --> 00:09:19,712
Show is sold out, child.
No tickets left
62
00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:23,778
There is one left
with that black marketer
63
00:09:24,377 --> 00:09:28,382
Scomrhll
Ghriqlnfllhllllm
64
00:09:28,448 --> 00:09:29,358
So true!
65
00:09:29,582 --> 00:09:32,756
VKIHI.
flfldylllllfllfi
66
00:09:32,819 --> 00:09:33,923
OK, Sir
67
00:09:34,320 --> 00:09:35,390
flunk!!!"
68
00:09:44,731 --> 00:09:46,267
Yes!
69
00:09:57,710 --> 00:09:59,451
-8Il
- Dolknowyou?
70
00:09:59,812 --> 00:10:01,018
Where's my ticket?
71
00:10:01,347 --> 00:10:04,294
'If?
YQIIJIQAN
72
00:10:04,417 --> 00:10:06,328
You bloody cheat!
73
00:10:06,552 --> 00:10:08,964
Decaying dacoit!
Senile snake! Capitalist!
74
00:10:09,022 --> 00:10:10,296
Mind your language!
75
00:10:10,323 --> 00:10:12,633
Mind your coat first!
76
00:10:13,860 --> 00:10:16,397
"Nwnlillllholhum
-80olllyl
77
00:10:16,629 --> 00:10:18,905
- VVrinkled wreck!
- Security!
78
00:10:19,599 --> 00:10:22,011
Let's get outta here
79
00:10:22,635 --> 00:10:25,309
I'll get you for this!
80
00:10:25,772 --> 00:10:28,013
Don't chase me...
catch him!
81
00:10:42,021 --> 00:10:45,366
Oldies these days!
It's a spoilt generation!
82
00:10:45,591 --> 00:10:48,435
Forget it
83
00:10:48,661 --> 00:10:49,639
How can I?
84
00:10:50,063 --> 00:10:52,543
That bandit basks in poetry
and here I am
85
00:10:52,598 --> 00:10:53,599
"M:
86
00:10:55,335 --> 00:10:58,339
Why pine for the party
that shuns us?
87
00:10:58,604 --> 00:11:01,778
Follow the moment
that beckons us
88
00:11:02,275 --> 00:11:04,448
I too dabble in poetry
89
00:11:07,747 --> 00:11:13,561
y o ulqfloli.) Lggeotrg; rne
90
00:11:14,821 --> 00:11:16,823
- You crazy?
- I mean it!
91
00:11:17,523 --> 00:11:19,366
Your favorite poet,
senior Mr Bachchan
92
00:11:19,525 --> 00:11:22,301
met a lady one morning,
wooed her with verse
93
00:11:22,595 --> 00:11:24,871
By duskstgelzfgvtéergdrnarried-
94
00:11:25,031 --> 00:11:26,408
Really?
95
00:11:26,766 --> 00:11:29,474
Lnaklnlliflipaanhlninl-
96
00:11:29,736 --> 00:11:31,841
Amitabh Bachchan -
the great actor
97
00:11:33,740 --> 00:11:34,650
Jaggu
98
00:11:35,308 --> 00:11:36,048
Jaggu?
99
00:11:36,776 --> 00:11:37,777
Wining
100
00:11:38,011 --> 00:11:41,390
Papa named me Jagat Janani:
world's mother
101
00:11:41,681 --> 00:11:45,686
I got mocked at school
so I shortened it - Jaggu
102
00:11:46,019 --> 00:11:47,760
- From Mumbai?
- No. Delhi
103
00:11:47,954 --> 00:11:49,695
I'm studying TV production
104
00:11:49,822 --> 00:11:50,892
nun"?
105
00:11:51,324 --> 00:11:53,998
Sarfaraz. I study architecture
106
00:11:54,694 --> 00:11:57,368
and work part time
at the Pakistan Embassy
107
00:11:57,730 --> 00:11:59,676
Pakistan Embassy? Why?
108
00:12:00,033 --> 00:12:02,274
Well, I'm from Pakistan
109
00:12:02,468 --> 00:12:05,915
Unlikely the Indian Embassy
will employ me!
110
00:12:08,408 --> 00:12:09,751
What's wrong?
111
00:12:10,443 --> 00:12:11,717
Nothing
112
00:12:15,515 --> 00:12:20,555
My being from Pakistan
perturbs you?
113
00:12:22,889 --> 00:12:24,562
Alright then
114
00:12:24,991 --> 00:12:26,937
Goodbye
115
00:12:42,542 --> 00:12:48,618
Ask not my name,
nor my country
116
00:12:49,449 --> 00:12:54,990
From bondage of
borders break free
117
00:12:56,022 --> 00:13:01,563
fill
on
118
00:13:02,295 --> 00:13:07,506
llllllllll.
119
00:13:17,577 --> 00:13:21,320
Ask not my name,
nor my country
120
00:13:21,681 --> 00:13:24,753
From bondage of
borders break free
121
00:13:25,551 --> 00:13:29,431
fill
on
122
00:13:29,755 --> 00:13:32,895
llllllllll.
123
00:13:33,726 --> 00:13:37,333
Past the realms of
word and speech
124
00:13:37,763 --> 00:13:40,767
Hand in hand,
nowhere to reach
125
00:13:41,767 --> 00:13:45,305
fill
on
126
00:13:45,771 --> 00:13:48,513
llllllllll.
127
00:13:49,308 --> 00:13:53,051
Past the realms of
word and speech
128
00:13:53,813 --> 00:13:56,885
Hand in hand,
nowhere to reach
129
00:13:57,950 --> 00:14:01,523
fill
on
130
00:14:01,854 --> 00:14:05,768
llllllllll.
131
00:14:25,845 --> 00:14:29,588
If the sun scorches
the pathway
132
00:14:29,882 --> 00:14:33,329
Iaifi
133
00:14:33,786 --> 00:14:37,598
If darknessfifls you with dismay
134
00:14:37,890 --> 00:14:41,497
I'M conjure up
a moon in the sky
135
00:14:41,894 --> 00:14:45,603
lflflnfip
WWW
136
00:14:45,932 --> 00:14:49,470
With laughter
H! shoo it away
137
00:14:49,936 --> 00:14:53,645
Laughing, frolicking,
humming a song
138
00:14:53,906 --> 00:14:57,410
I
“Hm”
139
00:15:15,728 --> 00:15:19,369
KIW-
mgpwlunhl'
140
00:15:19,699 --> 00:15:22,578
Nothing in this world I fear
141
00:15:23,603 --> 00:15:27,551
Why a few steps,
a whole lifelong
142
00:15:27,740 --> 00:15:30,914
With you I'll walk along
143
00:15:31,510 --> 00:15:35,390
Past the realms of
word and speech
144
00:15:35,681 --> 00:15:38,958
Hand in hand,
nowhere to reach
145
00:15:39,685 --> 00:15:43,428
fill
on
146
00:15:43,723 --> 00:15:47,535
llllllllll.
147
00:16:29,268 --> 00:16:31,270
- Thank you
- Thank you
148
00:16:32,405 --> 00:16:33,440
Mom!
149
00:16:33,506 --> 00:16:34,382
Papa!
150
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:35,919
She's fallen in love!
151
00:16:36,475 --> 00:16:38,648
Fallen in love?
152
00:16:39,278 --> 00:16:40,416
He's so cute!
153
00:16:40,813 --> 00:16:41,985
More photos please!
154
00:16:42,448 --> 00:16:44,951
'I/Vhafs his job?
'i/Vhafs his family like?
155
00:16:45,584 --> 00:16:47,495
XIIKIIXIL
flflyu
156
00:16:47,720 --> 00:16:49,722
First, the name
157
00:16:50,022 --> 00:16:51,592
Sarfaraz
158
00:16:51,957 --> 00:16:53,800
Muslim?
159
00:16:54,527 --> 00:16:58,304
Yes. Studies architecture.
Family is in Pakistan
160
00:16:58,464 --> 00:17:00,705
Pakistan!
Which Pakistan?
161
00:17:00,933 --> 00:17:02,503
There's just
one Pakistan, Mom
162
00:17:02,702 --> 00:17:03,578
You'll wear burkhas?
163
00:17:03,836 --> 00:17:05,873
Read the Quran?
Have you gone mad?
164
00:17:06,005 --> 00:17:08,884
B°"'“'?'an:url'"'
165
00:17:09,241 --> 00:17:10,515
Stan the car
166
00:17:10,776 --> 00:17:12,756
Alnhulldfihlfii.
“ii.
167
00:17:13,312 --> 00:17:15,815
I knew exactly
where Papa was headed
168
00:17:16,248 --> 00:17:20,628
Since childhood one face had
surrounded us: His Holiness
169
00:17:20,786 --> 00:17:22,459
Bye Mom
170
00:17:23,255 --> 00:17:25,929
From bags to bathroom walls,
171
00:17:26,325 --> 00:17:29,329
he was omnipresent
172
00:17:30,396 --> 00:17:35,277
Even for a root canal
he would set the auspicious time
173
00:17:36,769 --> 00:17:41,741
He had gifted Papa a God box
with a deity for every task
174
00:17:42,808 --> 00:17:46,722
Goddess of Wealth
for the stock market
175
00:17:47,780 --> 00:17:51,785
God of Health for workouts
176
00:17:52,418 --> 00:17:55,627
Web-based worship and
sacred sweets by courier
177
00:17:55,821 --> 00:17:59,894
were his innovations
178
00:18:03,796 --> 00:18:06,834
Hail, Your Holiness
179
00:18:08,868 --> 00:18:10,370
Hail, Your Holiness
180
00:18:12,438 --> 00:18:14,816
Touch his feet Jaggu
181
00:18:24,417 --> 00:18:28,263
Why this fatal infatuation?
182
00:18:28,587 --> 00:18:31,830
Pick up a pen and write
183
00:18:32,324 --> 00:18:33,632
God
184
00:18:34,593 --> 00:18:36,402
Enlighten me
185
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,570
Yin...
186
00:18:43,969 --> 00:18:45,312
Yin...
187
00:18:46,338 --> 00:18:48,682
Your wish is our command
188
00:18:49,375 --> 00:18:51,355
Write down the prophecy
189
00:18:51,644 --> 00:18:53,715
This Pakistani boy,
190
00:18:53,979 --> 00:18:55,583
Sarfaraz,
191
00:18:56,849 --> 00:18:58,294
will betray you
192
00:18:58,484 --> 00:19:00,623
I know he won't
193
00:19:02,288 --> 00:19:08,705
History stands witness:
these people scheme and betray
194
00:19:08,894 --> 00:19:12,569
He will pursue
carnal pleasures
195
00:19:12,665 --> 00:19:15,908
But will never marry you.
He'll vanish
196
00:19:16,302 --> 00:19:20,910
Come home now! One more
night there, and you're dead to us
197
00:19:20,973 --> 00:19:23,920
Mr Sahni,
I'll talk to her
198
00:19:24,477 --> 00:19:27,947
Child, hit the delete button
199
00:19:28,514 --> 00:19:31,518
Banish him
from your system
200
00:19:35,721 --> 00:19:37,291
Hello!
201
00:19:39,558 --> 00:19:40,935
What happened?
202
00:19:42,528 --> 00:19:44,303
Do you love me?
203
00:19:44,797 --> 00:19:46,470
Of course I do. Vkfhy?
204
00:19:47,333 --> 00:19:50,280
- Will you marn/ me?
- What's the matter?
205
00:19:50,402 --> 00:19:51,403
Yes or no, Sarfaraz?
206
00:19:51,670 --> 00:19:53,581
- Yes, but...
- Tomorrow
207
00:19:55,508 --> 00:19:57,647
Tomorrow we get married
208
00:19:58,811 --> 00:20:02,349
r- Dig-in?'-
209
00:20:15,528 --> 00:20:18,532
Mr James Herrick and
Miss Oprah Brown, you're next
210
00:20:18,797 --> 00:20:21,744
- James isn't here, yet.
- Oh, talk to the registrar
211
00:20:22,701 --> 00:20:24,510
Could you just
hold this please?
212
00:20:24,770 --> 00:20:25,976
- Yes of course.
- Thank you
213
00:20:27,439 --> 00:20:28,713
Hello...
214
00:20:30,509 --> 00:20:31,783
This is for you
215
00:20:32,511 --> 00:20:33,956
' W625?
216
00:20:34,446 --> 00:20:35,823
Flunk!!!"
217
00:20:40,686 --> 00:20:41,892
It was from Sarfaraz
218
00:20:42,488 --> 00:20:45,560
He said: marriage isn't just
between individuals, but families
219
00:20:45,925 --> 00:20:48,906
Our faiths, countries,
cultures are different
220
00:20:49,428 --> 00:20:51,874
We can never be happy
if our families are unhappy
221
00:20:52,031 --> 00:20:54,477
Don't try to contact me
222
00:20:54,700 --> 00:20:56,077
mill'!
223
00:21:16,822 --> 00:21:18,495
Where to go young ladV?
224
00:21:19,291 --> 00:21:19,928
New Delhi
225
00:21:24,296 --> 00:21:28,335
I came back to my city, but
my parents refused to see me
226
00:21:28,534 --> 00:21:30,480
Ljdannllndlfllld
227
00:21:30,736 --> 00:21:32,909
Today's story:
a depressed dog
228
00:21:33,305 --> 00:21:34,579
That's our breaking news!
229
00:21:34,907 --> 00:21:38,480
Some days we had news,
some days we fabricated it
230
00:21:58,864 --> 00:22:02,004
Missing: God
231
00:22:02,935 --> 00:22:05,711
If found, contact Tipsy
232
00:22:09,475 --> 00:22:11,887
There's a story in this man.
I'll see you at office
233
00:22:12,277 --> 00:22:13,881
Don't be late!
234
00:22:27,459 --> 00:22:28,563
Excuse me?
235
00:22:28,927 --> 00:22:30,565
Why are you
handing these out?
236
00:22:31,330 --> 00:22:33,310
I have a case
pending with Him
237
00:22:33,532 --> 00:22:35,512
He neither solves it,
nor meets me
238
00:22:35,801 --> 00:22:38,008
My life is kaput
239
00:22:39,304 --> 00:22:41,841
He's gone into hiding
240
00:22:43,308 --> 00:22:45,549
Have you seen Him around?
241
00:22:46,545 --> 00:22:48,354
L\l0
242
00:22:50,916 --> 00:22:59,495
Hail Goddess,
Hail Holy Mother
243
00:22:59,658 --> 00:23:03,936
Hail Goddess,
Hail Holy Mother
244
00:23:04,329 --> 00:23:06,536
By the way,
what's with the helmet?
245
00:23:06,865 --> 00:23:08,811
Got the idea from taxi-tops
246
00:23:09,301 --> 00:23:11,907
Yellow yells out from miles
247
00:23:12,337 --> 00:23:15,341
Taxis are spotted
easily in traffic
248
00:23:15,741 --> 00:23:19,279
-80?
-8oGodclllpdnl0ql
249
00:23:19,545 --> 00:23:23,652
How else will he spot me
in this crowd?
250
00:23:31,857 --> 00:23:34,394
Annapurna-wild!
251
00:23:34,593 --> 00:23:35,867
Ok, background?
252
00:23:36,462 --> 00:23:37,805
Cue .3899“
253
00:23:38,664 --> 00:23:41,508
Thvllw
uimlnuumuuu
254
00:23:41,834 --> 00:23:45,941
Here's Nikku.
Mr Sweetie Singh's dog
255
00:23:46,605 --> 00:23:50,052
Nikku has attempted
suicide thrice
256
00:23:50,309 --> 00:23:55,850
Jumping off a roof, licking sleeping
pills, hopping onto a gas burner
257
00:23:56,315 --> 00:23:58,352
What's wrong with Nikku?
258
00:23:58,450 --> 00:24:01,590
Is Nikku prey to a
mental problem?
259
00:24:02,287 --> 00:24:03,595
Is Nikku...
260
00:24:05,758 --> 00:24:07,499
What's wrong Jaggu?
261
00:24:07,893 --> 00:24:09,634
What is this shit, Mitu?
262
00:24:13,866 --> 00:24:17,370
Our chat with famed industrialist
Mr Ratan continues
263
00:24:17,436 --> 00:24:19,279
right after this break
264
00:24:20,572 --> 00:24:22,813
Going we“, Raven'?
Some coffee'?
265
00:24:23,275 --> 00:24:24,549
Get him some coffee
266
00:24:24,710 --> 00:24:26,781
- Cherry...
- Oh no!
267
00:24:26,912 --> 00:24:30,382
What's your guess? This dog has
depression, anxiety disorder,
268
00:24:30,582 --> 00:24:33,825
schizophrenia, or ADHD?
269
00:24:34,353 --> 00:24:35,957
Re?
270
00:24:36,288 --> 00:24:37,289
Exactly
271
00:24:37,489 --> 00:24:42,302
Why would anyone care?
Then why do we air such bull?
272
00:24:42,995 --> 00:24:44,838
What would you rather air?
273
00:24:44,963 --> 00:24:47,307
Hold him please
274
00:24:49,001 --> 00:24:50,036
See this?
275
00:24:50,435 --> 00:24:53,507
I met a guy distributing
these pamphlets
276
00:24:53,872 --> 00:24:56,648
- He is searching for God.
- Found Him?
277
00:24:57,309 --> 00:24:58,811
No... Ill
278
00:24:58,911 --> 00:25:03,257
Searching for God - that's religion.
Finding God - that's news
279
00:25:03,282 --> 00:25:05,762
If he finds God, get him.
I'll put him on air
280
00:25:05,984 --> 00:25:07,827
You know the Company policy
281
00:25:08,253 --> 00:25:10,563
No news on religion,
no news on God. Finished
282
00:25:11,256 --> 00:25:12,462
Man, you've changed!
283
00:25:12,825 --> 00:25:14,896
Where's the fighter,
Chern/ Bajwa?
284
00:25:15,394 --> 00:25:17,772
You wanna see the fighter?
285
00:25:18,397 --> 00:25:19,876
Take a good look
286
00:25:20,432 --> 00:25:22,810
There are three marks here
287
00:25:23,368 --> 00:25:24,813
These aren't birthmarks
288
00:25:24,937 --> 00:25:29,352
'Iliiflluinrlnruunn,
vwnuheuu
289
00:25:29,608 --> 00:25:32,851
His devotees shoved a trident
right here in my bum
290
00:25:33,345 --> 00:25:35,757
Anchor coming to you
in 10 seconds
291
00:25:35,881 --> 00:25:38,487
"Iii I -
292
00:25:38,750 --> 00:25:40,457
chflllivllfil.
'his!
293
00:25:40,586 --> 00:25:42,566
Jhgatldluwbnnnow
-6...4...
294
00:25:42,654 --> 00:25:43,291
3...
295
00:25:43,322 --> 00:25:44,027
2...
296
00:25:44,456 --> 00:25:44,957
'I...
297
00:25:45,457 --> 00:25:46,561
Welcome back from the break
298
00:25:46,792 --> 00:25:49,830
We were chatting with
famed industrialist Mr Ratan...
299
00:25:50,028 --> 00:25:52,907
The boss killed my story
300
00:25:53,298 --> 00:25:57,303
But it came back to life
two weeks later
301
00:26:37,476 --> 00:26:39,615
[ DONATION BOX]
302
00:26:45,550 --> 00:26:47,461
Stop! Thief!
303
00:26:47,786 --> 00:26:51,791
He's stealing
from the donation box!
304
00:27:09,574 --> 00:27:10,951
Don't let him go!
305
00:27:18,450 --> 00:27:20,953
Lifting from the
donation box, you fool?
306
00:27:21,253 --> 00:27:21,754
Yes
307
00:27:21,820 --> 00:27:23,595
He's no thief!
308
00:27:23,922 --> 00:27:27,335
VVhile donating
my wallet fell in the box
309
00:27:27,426 --> 00:27:29,702
He was getting it out for me
310
00:27:30,429 --> 00:27:31,567
Trust me
311
00:27:31,830 --> 00:27:36,438
Check for yourself.
It has Rs 5,000 in it
312
00:27:52,851 --> 00:27:54,626
' TTe-'figine'
313
00:27:54,886 --> 00:27:57,025
Once in the box,
it's donated
314
00:27:57,422 --> 00:28:00,426
Now, it's God's.
Let them go
315
00:28:01,426 --> 00:28:03,906
Dude, what the hell
were you up to?
316
00:28:03,962 --> 00:28:05,407
Claiming my refund
317
00:28:05,564 --> 00:28:07,475
God took His fee
but didn't deliver
318
00:28:07,532 --> 00:28:09,239
"h! on...
319
00:28:09,701 --> 00:28:13,672
I saw you fish out some money,
then put some back in
320
00:28:13,739 --> 00:28:18,586
I took back what I'd paid
at this branch. Returned the rest
321
00:28:19,578 --> 00:28:21,717
You used to wear
beads and amulets?
322
00:28:21,780 --> 00:28:23,851
Rejected. Gone for good
323
00:28:24,349 --> 00:28:26,852
Why the stickers then?
324
00:28:27,419 --> 00:28:29,592
Self-defense!
325
00:28:30,322 --> 00:28:33,326
God pics on walls - prevent peeing
326
00:28:33,558 --> 00:28:36,698
on face - prevent punches
327
00:28:42,667 --> 00:28:44,271
Mitu, where are you?
328
00:28:44,503 --> 00:28:46,881
PQIIIIP-
hnmnnnlyblliWm
329
00:28:47,339 --> 00:28:48,545
I'll fill you in later
330
00:28:48,807 --> 00:28:52,311
I'm at Mudrika,
outside the temple
331
00:28:52,744 --> 00:28:54,746
Hun.
'Blight
332
00:28:58,283 --> 00:29:01,321
- For what?
- For the ride home
333
00:29:01,653 --> 00:29:06,261
When someone can't
get home, I feel sad
334
00:29:07,893 --> 00:29:11,272
ma.
mun-um
335
00:29:11,530 --> 00:29:13,567
I can't accept this
336
00:29:13,932 --> 00:29:17,846
"In?
dlhflyulmdlbfihmll?
337
00:29:22,441 --> 00:29:26,253
Money can't get me home
338
00:29:26,378 --> 00:29:29,325
Why'? Where do you Ywe'?
339
00:29:37,289 --> 00:29:40,793
In the step-well ruins
340
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:46,966
But in this rainy season,
I check into a lock-up
341
00:29:47,699 --> 00:29:50,305
AnhpoloQlock-lql?
342
00:29:50,535 --> 00:29:54,278
There are 122 in the city.
I yo-yo between them
343
00:29:54,473 --> 00:29:57,716
And they let you check in,
like a hotel?
344
00:29:57,976 --> 00:30:00,582
Rlflllbyuuadnnno
345
00:30:04,282 --> 00:30:05,886
[Signi DO NOT URINATE HERE]
346
00:30:09,855 --> 00:30:11,425
Just watch!
347
00:30:12,424 --> 00:30:14,995
[Signi DO NOT URINATE HERE]
348
00:30:15,427 --> 00:30:18,431
Hey, copper -
look here proper!
349
00:30:33,678 --> 00:30:36,022
I'll show you proper!
350
00:30:45,924 --> 00:30:47,597
Jaggu!
351
00:30:50,362 --> 00:30:52,364
We have to
follow that van
352
00:30:52,464 --> 00:30:55,445
-"-':'.':.1""'?
353
00:31:09,648 --> 00:31:12,458
Gimme your wallet.
I need cash
354
00:31:13,552 --> 00:31:15,896
M.
BIO
355
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:29,708
Excuse me?
356
00:31:30,702 --> 00:31:31,612
Yes?
357
00:31:31,770 --> 00:31:34,410
I want to go
inside the lock-up
358
00:31:34,539 --> 00:31:35,745
Why'?
359
00:31:36,641 --> 00:31:38,814
To meet that guy
360
00:31:40,512 --> 00:31:43,049
You think this is the
local coffee joint, huh?
361
00:31:43,315 --> 00:31:46,660
Saunter in and chillax
with your buddies?
362
00:31:46,918 --> 00:31:48,454
This is a lock-up, get it?
363
00:31:48,853 --> 00:31:52,665
Only offenders get in
364
00:31:54,492 --> 00:31:56,597
Bribing is an offence!
365
00:31:57,395 --> 00:32:00,342
That's why I'm committing it!
366
00:32:00,432 --> 00:32:01,410
I can lock you in
367
00:32:01,466 --> 00:32:03,571
Please do... ASAP!
368
00:32:10,775 --> 00:32:13,813
- Thank you, Mr Pandey.
- One hour, that's it
369
00:32:13,979 --> 00:32:15,515
I-li
370
00:32:16,681 --> 00:32:21,027
I want your story.
Will you share it?
371
00:32:21,886 --> 00:32:22,762
Why'?
372
00:32:23,021 --> 00:32:26,332
PIIIQTUIIZI-bl;
373
00:32:38,870 --> 00:32:43,717
- Go on, ask.
- Awesome!
374
00:32:48,513 --> 00:32:50,754
Your name?
375
00:32:51,616 --> 00:32:53,527
Don't have a name
376
00:32:53,618 --> 00:32:56,326
The' Siltifiqliiii, "em"
377
00:32:56,388 --> 00:32:58,766
And what do you do?
378
00:33:00,992 --> 00:33:03,404
I'm an astronaut
379
00:33:04,963 --> 00:33:06,567
Astronaut!
380
00:33:06,831 --> 00:33:09,277
Those who shoot off
to the moon?
381
00:33:09,567 --> 00:33:12,776
Been there once.
It's kaput
382
00:33:14,439 --> 00:33:15,975
Sure!
383
00:33:16,641 --> 00:33:18,450
So what's your
favorite planet?
384
00:33:18,510 --> 00:33:21,491
401mm.
dmaulhoaldnoklh?
385
00:33:21,713 --> 00:33:23,750
Eaflh is mega-kaput
386
00:33:23,982 --> 00:33:26,553
I meant my own planet
387
00:33:30,288 --> 00:33:34,293
It'll show up there at night
388
00:33:34,759 --> 00:33:37,000
We went bananas,
389
00:33:37,462 --> 00:33:42,411
when we found another planet
with people like us
390
00:33:42,967 --> 00:33:45,538
'IN
391
00:33:45,670 --> 00:33:47,581
Boy, what a welcome I got!
392
00:33:47,839 --> 00:33:50,012
My remote got robbed
393
00:33:50,842 --> 00:33:54,380
loflflnblflllqrpnapli
394
00:33:54,446 --> 00:33:57,586
and without a signal
they won't come for me
395
00:33:57,882 --> 00:34:00,556
They'll think
it's a perilous planet
396
00:34:00,719 --> 00:34:03,359
That I'm dead as a dodo
397
00:34:07,792 --> 00:34:08,600
Hello!
398
00:34:08,827 --> 00:34:10,272
- Listen . . .
- What?
399
00:34:10,528 --> 00:34:12,007
Ldlnooll.
lullhgolnlm
400
00:34:12,430 --> 00:34:16,401
Your Highness, convicts
don't decide that. Cops do
401
00:34:16,568 --> 00:34:17,945
I'm not a thief
402
00:34:18,269 --> 00:34:19,680
So say all the thieves
403
00:34:19,971 --> 00:34:22,272
Where's officer Pandey?
404
00:34:22,273 --> 00:34:23,809
Out on his rounds
405
00:34:24,542 --> 00:34:26,283
Officer Pandey!
406
00:34:27,379 --> 00:34:27,857
Officer Pandey!
407
00:34:27,912 --> 00:34:30,984
Shut up, or you get
a knuckle sandwich
408
00:34:50,735 --> 00:34:53,579
'Mill
Pmilfifll?
409
00:34:54,305 --> 00:34:55,784
Obviously!
410
00:34:56,307 --> 00:34:58,480
Is Hindi the official language
of your planet?
411
00:34:58,576 --> 00:35:00,385
On our planet...
412
00:35:00,945 --> 00:35:03,653
...there's no language!
413
00:35:03,948 --> 00:35:06,656
We read minds.
There's no confusion
414
00:35:06,885 --> 00:35:09,866
Here, you utter something
and mean something else
415
00:35:09,921 --> 00:35:12,299
A two-letter word can have
four different meanings
416
00:35:12,724 --> 00:35:17,537
When you nod and say “oh“,
it means “Oh, that's cool“
417
00:35:18,797 --> 00:35:22,006
When your eyes pop out,
"oh!" means bad news
418
00:35:22,434 --> 00:35:25,278
“Your mother-in-law
is moving in.“ “Oh!“
419
00:35:26,337 --> 00:35:28,749
When angry, you thunder
420
00:35:29,007 --> 00:35:32,477
"Oh! You'll pay
for that blunder!"
421
00:35:32,811 --> 00:35:35,724
A“ W"$:.:; 00:35:38,892
"Ohhhhhhh! I see!"
423
00:35:39,818 --> 00:35:43,027
As you hear the words,
you gotta watch the expression
424
00:35:43,288 --> 00:35:45,290
to get the real meaning
425
00:35:45,356 --> 00:35:49,498
Iihhd
'IatllQMIQbZI-III
426
00:35:49,627 --> 00:35:52,733
A whole language in 6 hours?
427
00:35:52,797 --> 00:35:55,403
No one let me hold hands
428
00:35:55,834 --> 00:35:57,973
Finally, a nice lady
lent her hand
429
00:35:58,036 --> 00:36:01,916
I held it and transferred
her language into my system
430
00:36:01,973 --> 00:36:06,854
Man, there's no limit
to your whoppers!
431
00:36:06,945 --> 00:36:09,482
Is your hand a USB cable,
432
00:36:09,747 --> 00:36:13,490
that transfers files
between computers?
433
00:36:13,785 --> 00:36:17,528
And your clothes? Are faded jeans
the rage on your planet too?
434
00:36:17,689 --> 00:36:19,259
Noooo!
435
00:36:19,524 --> 00:36:20,662
On our planet...
436
00:36:20,892 --> 00:36:24,931
...no one wears clothes.
There we go bare
437
00:36:25,396 --> 00:36:28,275
Here, at first I thought
438
00:36:28,766 --> 00:36:32,270
your skins were
different from ours
439
00:36:32,770 --> 00:36:34,943
Some had sparkly hides,
440
00:36:35,273 --> 00:36:37,879
some jet black
441
00:36:38,943 --> 00:36:41,924
Some hides were colorful,
some white
442
00:36:42,847 --> 00:36:46,852
Some hides sticky- tigh t,some baggy
443
00:36:48,887 --> 00:36:51,800
Then one day
I found a car
444
00:36:52,023 --> 00:36:53,400
A dancing car
445
00:36:59,597 --> 00:37:04,979
That day I realized
our skins were the same
446
00:37:05,370 --> 00:37:10,251
but yours are covered
with a thing called fashion
447
00:37:15,513 --> 00:37:18,289
Radio Commercial
448
00:37:18,449 --> 00:37:21,726
Now I could mingle
449
00:37:21,986 --> 00:37:25,729
Yet I was mocked
450
00:37:26,524 --> 00:37:29,835
Latina-
lflnlglflvmlll
451
00:37:30,995 --> 00:37:32,599
Slowly I got it
452
00:37:32,730 --> 00:37:35,768
There's man - fashion
and woman - fashion
453
00:37:36,568 --> 00:37:37,842
There was day fashion...
454
00:37:38,269 --> 00:37:39,771
...and night fashion
455
00:37:40,271 --> 00:37:41,511
Sporting fashion...
456
00:37:41,539 --> 00:37:43,314
...and serving fashion
457
00:37:46,311 --> 00:37:50,282
With the clothes,
I found some photos
458
00:38:02,594 --> 00:38:07,976
It hit me - these photos
meant survival
459
00:38:08,766 --> 00:38:11,576
'huoufi
xlunlrlnd
460
00:38:11,736 --> 00:38:15,240
Sol built a portfolio
of this old man's photos
461
00:38:30,822 --> 00:38:32,597
What's this?
462
00:38:36,728 --> 00:38:39,004
What are these for?
463
00:38:41,499 --> 00:38:44,605
If Illytbynufllriqlll.
464
00:38:47,271 --> 00:38:49,615
Right! Now we're talking!
465
00:38:49,874 --> 00:38:51,649
Here you go
466
00:38:52,644 --> 00:38:56,786
I got it: this photo had value
on just one kind of paper
467
00:38:57,315 --> 00:39:01,525
On any other paper,
it was worthless
468
00:39:03,721 --> 00:39:07,294
For cash and clothes,
dancing cars were widely available
469
00:39:07,425 --> 00:39:10,497
They were my bank,
they were my tailor!
470
00:39:12,330 --> 00:39:14,640
Once, I got
such magnetic afiire
471
00:39:14,866 --> 00:39:17,847
that no photos
were needed
472
00:39:17,902 --> 00:39:20,246
Food was puffed to me
473
00:39:20,405 --> 00:39:22,248
For you, Sir
474
00:39:24,475 --> 00:39:28,446
Now, to find my remote, I had to
learn this planet's language
475
00:39:28,613 --> 00:39:31,719
Hindi
Ivnryhlrunclild
476
00:39:32,250 --> 00:39:33,786
Like telling this gentleman
477
00:39:33,918 --> 00:39:37,559
there was a defect
in his fashion
478
00:39:44,429 --> 00:39:47,706
I felt I had spoilt his fashion
479
00:39:49,367 --> 00:39:52,405
So I put it back
where it was
480
00:40:13,424 --> 00:40:19,397
[Radio Announcement]
481
00:40:23,301 --> 00:40:24,780
Found him on the road
482
00:40:25,436 --> 00:40:27,507
Some scumbag
hit him and bolted
483
00:40:28,306 --> 00:40:30,343
Seems pretty okay,
484
00:40:31,509 --> 00:40:33,614
but isn't responding
485
00:40:34,445 --> 00:40:36,755
Has his eardrum
called it a day?
486
00:40:37,048 --> 00:40:38,994
Are you deaf?
487
00:40:39,517 --> 00:40:42,930
Can hear alright,
but isn't talking
488
00:40:43,621 --> 00:40:45,828
Seems in a state of shock
489
00:40:46,057 --> 00:40:49,334
Memory loss, I'm afraid
490
00:40:59,837 --> 00:41:02,818
Rumunlaulhoaullllfl
IIIIIIYIII?
491
00:41:05,009 --> 00:41:07,421
Remember the license plate?
492
00:41:08,546 --> 00:41:11,755
Remember anything at all?
493
00:41:40,044 --> 00:41:43,514
Come my friend.
Come with me
494
00:41:44,649 --> 00:41:48,654
Be my guest till you
get your memory back
495
00:41:50,822 --> 00:41:52,893
Keep slamming your head
496
00:41:53,357 --> 00:41:58,670
One knock took your memory away,
another might bring it back
497
00:41:58,863 --> 00:42:00,467
Seen it in the movies
498
00:42:00,531 --> 00:42:02,875
To figure what he was
yapping about,
499
00:42:02,934 --> 00:42:07,314
I had to hold his hand
and transfer his language
500
00:42:09,574 --> 00:42:11,281
"Ill
501
00:42:12,844 --> 00:42:16,291
With memon/ loss your gender
sense went for a toss?
502
00:42:16,514 --> 00:42:17,424
Wait a moment...
503
00:42:18,482 --> 00:42:19,893
See this - my license
504
00:42:20,384 --> 00:42:21,795
Sex: MALE
505
00:42:22,286 --> 00:42:22,855
U."
506
00:42:23,287 --> 00:42:25,961
rogue, rascal, scumbag
507
00:42:27,625 --> 00:42:32,631
To return home
I had to hold someohe's hand
508
00:42:48,679 --> 00:42:52,684
Here comes my zany guest
509
00:42:55,820 --> 00:42:59,461
Can't tell guy from gal
Happily hits on all
510
00:43:02,793 --> 00:43:05,899
Here comes my zany guest
511
00:43:06,364 --> 00:43:09,573
Can't tell guy from gal
Happily hits on all
512
00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:13,373
Your frantic antics if not stilled,
will surely get me killed!
513
00:43:13,537 --> 00:43:16,347
Don't be a scourge
Do curb your urge
514
00:43:17,275 --> 00:43:23,954
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
515
00:43:25,549 --> 00:43:33,297
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
516
00:44:09,994 --> 00:44:13,703
Tourist in tacky gear
are you from near or far
517
00:44:13,864 --> 00:44:17,004
From Mumbai, Madrid
or Madagascar
518
00:44:17,568 --> 00:44:20,708
Tourist in tacky gear
are you from near or far
519
00:44:20,905 --> 00:44:24,284
From Mumbai, Madrid
or Madagascar
520
00:44:24,342 --> 00:44:31,351
What was your name at school
Was it nerdy or was it cool?
521
00:44:31,515 --> 00:44:38,296
What was your name at school
Was it nerdy or was it cool?
522
00:44:38,556 --> 00:44:42,026
What's the zip code
Of your abode
523
00:44:42,393 --> 00:44:45,772
Did you alight from a cloud
Or sprout from underground
524
00:44:45,830 --> 00:44:49,471
Your frantic antics if not stilled,
will surely get me killed!
525
00:44:49,700 --> 00:44:52,476
Don't be a scourge
Do curb your urge
526
00:44:53,304 --> 00:45:00,313
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
527
00:45:02,246 --> 00:45:08,527
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
528
00:45:10,921 --> 00:45:14,835
This memory loss is a blessing
529
00:45:18,262 --> 00:45:21,402
This memory loss is a blessing
530
00:45:21,499 --> 00:45:24,878
Feuds forgotten
lenders lefi guessing
531
00:45:24,969 --> 00:45:26,539
Lovable lad
532
00:45:26,804 --> 00:45:28,374
Innocent cad
533
00:45:28,806 --> 00:45:31,844
Don't be a scourge
Do curb your urge
534
00:45:32,443 --> 00:45:38,553
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
535
00:45:41,318 --> 00:45:47,860
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
536
00:46:17,855 --> 00:46:24,295
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
537
00:46:24,628 --> 00:46:26,403
Here comes the lusty lad!
538
00:46:26,530 --> 00:46:27,873
Here comes the lusty lad!
539
00:46:27,932 --> 00:46:31,379
Here comes the lusty lad
My guest with this crazy fad
540
00:46:41,412 --> 00:46:43,517
I feel your pain, bro
541
00:46:43,981 --> 00:46:45,824
But don't go grabbing hands
542
00:46:46,851 --> 00:46:51,732
You may end up in bed,
but most likely a hospital bed
543
00:46:54,992 --> 00:46:58,804
Don't give up,
I know place for you
544
00:47:10,774 --> 00:47:14,244
Hand, foot -
hold whatever
545
00:47:14,411 --> 00:47:16,254
No one will bash you here
546
00:47:16,514 --> 00:47:17,549
Come
547
00:47:17,781 --> 00:47:22,526
What a neighborhood!
Virtuous, welcoming women
548
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:26,367
All reaching for my hand,
inviting me home
549
00:47:26,690 --> 00:47:30,968
Here I met a serene and
gentle woman, Pepper
550
00:47:31,262 --> 00:47:34,800
Pepper, take him
to the honeymoon suite
551
00:48:23,948 --> 00:48:25,985
Pepper sat patiently all night
552
00:48:26,350 --> 00:48:31,424
For fufl 6 hours,
I transferred her language files
553
00:48:31,855 --> 00:48:37,362
- XYZ-
ldslagdllfil
554
00:48:47,805 --> 00:48:52,845
First time')... Kaput before you kicked off?
555
00:48:57,982 --> 00:48:59,984
Y...y... ylll
556
00:49:01,385 --> 00:49:03,831
VVhere are you from?
557
00:49:06,790 --> 00:49:09,361
Far, far away
558
00:49:10,261 --> 00:49:13,299
From an unheard of village
559
00:49:13,497 --> 00:49:15,943
But you speak my lingo!
560
00:49:16,467 --> 00:49:21,314
Boolnollnlllllinlnyou,
Slur
561
00:49:21,405 --> 00:49:25,319
Sister! You think
this is a convent? Out!
562
00:49:27,444 --> 00:49:28,286
Bro!
563
00:49:29,513 --> 00:49:31,493
Bro, wake up!
564
00:49:32,283 --> 00:49:33,660
Bro, wake up!
565
00:49:34,451 --> 00:49:35,327
Bro!
566
00:49:36,654 --> 00:49:38,258
You're talking!
567
00:49:38,289 --> 00:49:40,895
Bro, I need your help
568
00:49:41,258 --> 00:49:43,295
Pepper cleared up your throat!
569
00:49:43,460 --> 00:49:45,269
Bro, come with me quick
570
00:49:45,296 --> 00:49:48,004
Memory and making out
have a direct connection!
571
00:49:48,832 --> 00:49:53,303
Update the docs:
get laid, get well!
572
00:49:53,404 --> 00:49:55,748
It's urgent, bro!
573
00:49:55,939 --> 00:49:56,974
Okay, let's go
574
00:50:04,281 --> 00:50:05,624
$9." flap!
575
00:50:05,783 --> 00:50:07,694
Stop, bro!
576
00:50:11,288 --> 00:50:14,963
'IIIIJIIKIIIIIIIIIIIII.
577
00:50:15,526 --> 00:50:18,336
I need my chain, bro.
I must get it back
578
00:50:18,495 --> 00:50:20,406
- Precious?
- It's priceless!
579
00:50:20,931 --> 00:50:23,639
The thief must be a local
580
00:50:24,001 --> 00:50:26,811
But he'll sell
the loot in Delhi
581
00:50:26,937 --> 00:50:30,578
If he sold pricey stuff here,
he'd get caught
582
00:50:31,608 --> 00:50:33,485
Then I must go
583
00:50:33,744 --> 00:50:35,451
Where?
584
00:50:36,046 --> 00:50:37,354
Delhi
585
00:51:01,305 --> 00:51:02,784
- Officer!
- Yeah?
586
00:51:03,374 --> 00:51:06,446
- Ilylt_lliculfllllbklnn-?
587
00:51:06,710 --> 00:51:09,657
Expect the police force
to track your TV remote?
588
00:51:10,314 --> 00:51:12,988
- IQIMQ'NUI&
In!!!?
589
00:51:13,951 --> 00:51:17,398
Can't tell you.
But it's like a chain
590
00:51:17,454 --> 00:51:18,865
Really precious
591
00:51:19,289 --> 00:51:21,792
- In
592
00:51:22,793 --> 00:51:26,741
And you're searching
in Delhi, you idiot?
593
00:51:27,331 --> 00:51:29,004
The thief came to Delhi
594
00:51:29,299 --> 00:51:31,301
-80?
momma-Qumran
595
00:51:31,335 --> 00:51:34,316
Blockhead!
It's a city of 15 million
596
00:51:34,438 --> 00:51:39,410
Pflniuhulll,
'MGM
597
00:51:40,811 --> 00:51:44,452
Only God can help you
598
00:51:45,516 --> 00:51:50,966
S urrender to God ,
you1lsucceed
599
00:51:51,388 --> 00:51:55,700
Only God knows
600
00:51:55,893 --> 00:51:59,636
Ask God, not me!
601
00:52:00,531 --> 00:52:03,910
Trust in God, my child
602
00:52:04,368 --> 00:52:09,750
Who was this God chap?
AH said only He could help
603
00:52:10,407 --> 00:52:13,411
What I saw blew my mind
604
00:52:13,677 --> 00:52:17,523
Earthlings had figured out
who had manufactured them!
605
00:52:17,881 --> 00:52:22,296
Their creator lived with them.
He had millions of houses
606
00:52:22,519 --> 00:52:28,868
Earthlings took their problems to Him,
which He solved for a smaH fee
607
00:52:29,393 --> 00:52:32,966
My planet had no such facility
608
00:52:33,397 --> 00:52:38,346
I could not believe it!
So decided to test it
609
00:52:40,337 --> 00:52:42,339
One take-away God
610
00:52:42,372 --> 00:52:45,751
VVhich one?
Rs 20, 100, 500?
611
00:52:46,310 --> 00:52:49,621
Any difference?
In the Rs 2O and Rs 500 ones?
612
00:52:49,813 --> 00:52:51,884
Just the size.
Otherwise ditto
613
00:52:51,949 --> 00:52:55,556
Rs 20 God is
equally efficient?
614
00:52:56,587 --> 00:53:00,330
OK, gimme R515!
Nothing less
615
00:53:13,003 --> 00:53:17,418
God, I am famished.
Get me some food please
616
00:53:29,386 --> 00:53:30,888
I went bananas
617
00:53:31,455 --> 00:53:35,426
God actually worked!
Now I could go home
618
00:53:35,492 --> 00:53:38,496
w! n' 'I-I“ b “I
619
00:53:38,729 --> 00:53:41,869
Please find it.
I want to go home
620
00:53:55,312 --> 00:53:59,419
God's battery died.
VVorked once, then kaput
621
00:53:59,483 --> 00:54:00,928
What do you mean?
622
00:54:00,984 --> 00:54:03,464
Stick a new battery in.
VVhere does it go?
623
00:54:03,520 --> 00:54:06,626
- It needs no battery.
- Then why is it off?
624
00:54:06,924 --> 00:54:10,633
- Manufacturing defect?
- I make no defective stuff
625
00:54:11,695 --> 00:54:16,474
- You made this God?
- Of course! VVith my own hands
626
00:54:16,967 --> 00:54:19,948
You made God,
or God made you?
627
00:54:20,270 --> 00:54:25,310
He made us all -
I only make His statues
628
00:54:25,442 --> 00:54:27,615
Why the statues?
629
00:54:27,711 --> 00:54:31,557
To worship Him.
To voice our problems
630
00:54:31,848 --> 00:54:36,319
Is there a transmitter inside?
How can He hear us?
631
00:54:37,287 --> 00:54:41,895
God needs no transmitter.
He hears directly
632
00:54:41,959 --> 00:54:44,940
HIGH?
Tlfllvllylllill?
633
00:54:45,329 --> 00:54:47,809
What's with him?
634
00:54:48,732 --> 00:54:52,544
Want to bust my business?
What's your problem?
635
00:54:53,337 --> 00:54:55,317
My remote is stolen, Sir
636
00:54:55,472 --> 00:54:58,749
I'm requesting God.
But He doesn't reply
637
00:54:59,309 --> 00:55:01,289
' Are YOU tipsy?
- Meaning?
638
00:55:01,311 --> 00:55:04,451
You're overloading
this pint-sized God
639
00:55:04,481 --> 00:55:07,257
His itty-bitty feet
can't chase the thief
640
00:55:07,351 --> 00:55:10,389
Bother the big God
inside the temple
641
00:55:10,787 --> 00:55:13,290
He'll run fast
642
00:55:13,323 --> 00:55:16,896
Ollurl-Inoooolllmdnnnq-
Hdldnlvor
643
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:18,906
Thafll be Rs 200
644
00:55:24,434 --> 00:55:28,644
Earthlings waited with fees
to get their work done
645
00:55:28,972 --> 00:55:31,782
Full 2 hours later
I got the appointment
646
00:55:31,942 --> 00:55:33,444
God,
647
00:55:34,978 --> 00:55:38,482
please get my remote back
648
00:55:40,484 --> 00:55:42,555
- VVhere is it?
- Move!
649
00:55:42,753 --> 00:55:44,630
Vi.
YD§XIIIICI
650
00:55:44,921 --> 00:55:49,370
He didn't deliver!
See, I paid His fee
651
00:55:49,426 --> 00:55:51,428
Jhllwulkwlhodono.
- Bll\nhnn?
652
00:55:51,495 --> 00:55:53,907
Can't say when,
but it will be done
653
00:55:54,031 --> 00:55:56,841
Jlwoon.
- Bmvllmwlllldl?
654
00:55:56,900 --> 00:55:58,607
Don't block the line, scram!
655
00:55:58,702 --> 00:56:01,410
“Will.
qmmlnkwqfil.
656
00:56:01,471 --> 00:56:02,313
Are you tipsy?
657
00:56:02,372 --> 00:56:06,286
Vvherel-fifilyh 2:? stuff?
658
00:56:06,343 --> 00:56:08,254
At the mental hospital!
659
00:56:08,345 --> 00:56:12,259
What? Cash here,
delivery at mental hospital!
660
00:56:12,282 --> 00:56:14,523
- Throw him out!
- OK, give me a receipt
661
00:56:14,618 --> 00:56:15,392
Out!
662
00:56:15,485 --> 00:56:18,796
VVithout a receipt
how do I claim my delivery?
663
00:56:18,855 --> 00:56:21,358
Get out!
664
00:56:21,425 --> 00:56:22,597
B ut my remote?
665
00:56:22,726 --> 00:56:23,898
Leave!
666
00:56:31,802 --> 00:56:34,578
I can't find my shoes
667
00:56:35,005 --> 00:56:38,316
Someone's taken them.
Now you take your pick
668
00:56:38,608 --> 00:56:41,555
Rotation is routine
at temples
669
00:56:54,891 --> 00:56:59,465
He took the payment,
didn't deliver
670
00:57:03,366 --> 00:57:04,640
What's his name?
671
00:57:04,701 --> 00:57:06,840
- They call Him God
- Real name?
672
00:57:07,304 --> 00:57:08,749
No idea
673
00:57:10,407 --> 00:57:11,579
Where does he live?
674
00:57:12,342 --> 00:57:14,344
In that temple
675
00:57:14,544 --> 00:57:18,356
- You handed him the cash?
- No. Put it in His box
676
00:57:18,415 --> 00:57:20,986
- Said he'd do the job?
- He says nothing
677
00:57:21,251 --> 00:57:22,753
Is he mute?
678
00:57:22,919 --> 00:57:24,626
Perhaps. . . maybe
679
00:57:25,255 --> 00:57:26,791
(II...
680
00:57:28,425 --> 00:57:30,496
Describe him
681
00:57:33,296 --> 00:57:35,276
Ditto
682
00:57:36,967 --> 00:57:39,538
But a bigger chap
683
00:57:40,504 --> 00:57:41,778
Come near...
684
00:57:43,673 --> 00:57:45,016
Are you tipsy?
685
00:57:45,809 --> 00:57:48,619
Yin.
l-lowdoyouflhmv?
686
00:57:48,712 --> 00:57:52,387
Think I'm a jackass?
2O years a cop!
687
00:57:52,482 --> 00:57:55,486
VVhds tipsy who's not
I can tell in a snap
688
00:57:56,520 --> 00:57:59,501
Frisk him
689
00:58:00,957 --> 00:58:03,494
Let me have a look
690
00:58:04,895 --> 00:58:06,670
Dr D'Mello...
691
00:58:07,397 --> 00:58:12,312
Doc, why get so buzzed
you forget your faith?
692
00:58:12,502 --> 00:58:16,382
Mistook temple for a church!
Wanna rouse a riot?
693
00:58:16,907 --> 00:58:21,413
Go to church.
To your own God
694
00:58:23,446 --> 00:58:25,255
Church?
695
00:59:13,630 --> 00:59:14,973
Get out of here
696
00:59:15,265 --> 00:59:18,269
My stuff!
My remote!
697
00:59:18,535 --> 00:59:21,675
Godvmonnllndhyowil.
Ullpfillnlnl
698
00:59:22,239 --> 00:59:26,244
Crucified! When?
699
00:59:26,509 --> 00:59:29,888
2,000 years ago.
For your sins!
700
00:59:30,480 --> 00:59:33,586
What did I do?
I just got here
701
00:59:35,318 --> 00:59:37,389
- Nflfliifl
nun
702
00:59:37,454 --> 00:59:40,264
(Sod isgvezitlgcgg you-
703
00:59:40,824 --> 00:59:42,462
Where?
704
00:59:42,726 --> 00:59:44,000
Where is God?
705
00:59:44,527 --> 00:59:46,006
What's in the mug?
706
00:59:46,263 --> 00:59:47,571
Wine
707
00:59:47,797 --> 00:59:51,711
MIDI
klfill
708
00:59:52,569 --> 00:59:55,311
God was bored of
coconut water
709
00:59:55,505 --> 00:59:59,385
Now He preferred wine.
But wine was expensive
710
00:59:59,576 --> 01:00:01,613
So I had to muster money
711
01:00:03,346 --> 01:00:07,852
I got some from the dancing car,
some from a gentleman
712
01:00:08,285 --> 01:00:10,856
who held out a bowl
of dole everyday
713
01:00:11,354 --> 01:00:14,494
You could withdraw
as per need
714
01:00:25,902 --> 01:00:31,409
[Radio Announcement]
715
01:00:34,711 --> 01:00:36,782
Sir, any God house
around here?
716
01:00:36,913 --> 01:00:38,893
Right there
717
01:00:39,015 --> 01:00:48,060
Preacher, let me drink
in God's abode
718
01:00:51,695 --> 01:00:58,476
Or show me a place
where there is no God
719
01:00:59,402 --> 01:01:01,882
Stop!
VVhaPs that?
720
01:01:02,305 --> 01:01:04,285
Wine, for God
721
01:01:04,574 --> 01:01:06,485
Where is He?
722
01:01:46,649 --> 01:01:48,856
This lady looked very sad
723
01:01:49,319 --> 01:01:51,993
To know why,
I grabbed her hand
724
01:01:52,422 --> 01:01:54,800
Fllhomnmuv,
mum
725
01:01:55,025 --> 01:01:57,369
“Mun
l-lowdoyouhmv?
726
01:01:57,494 --> 01:01:59,496
Don't you see
she's clad in white?
727
01:02:11,341 --> 01:02:12,342
Is everything fine?
728
01:02:12,409 --> 01:02:14,411
Everything is fine.
729
01:02:15,545 --> 01:02:17,491
Just relax. Smile.
730
01:02:18,848 --> 01:02:21,522
8on0!!!
you-unwind!!!
731
01:02:21,584 --> 01:02:22,927
- What?
- When?
732
01:02:23,286 --> 01:02:26,290
How do I know?
You are clad in white
733
01:02:26,356 --> 01:02:28,302
Brides wear white!
734
01:02:28,358 --> 01:02:30,964
No, widows wear white
735
01:02:31,327 --> 01:02:32,738
I&u
"Ilia
736
01:02:32,796 --> 01:02:35,936
Now don't
stress her out. Go!
737
01:02:45,942 --> 01:02:48,445
All three lost your husbands?
738
01:02:48,778 --> 01:02:50,985
I'm alive you moron!
Want a whack?
739
01:02:52,649 --> 01:02:54,788
Pll""fpl:I"I"
740
01:02:54,851 --> 01:02:58,458
there wasn't one God.
There were many Gods
741
01:02:58,555 --> 01:03:00,865
Each with His own
set of rules
742
01:03:01,324 --> 01:03:03,600
Each God had floated
His own Company
743
01:03:04,260 --> 01:03:06,262
They called it religion
744
01:03:06,596 --> 01:03:09,702
Each Company had
its own agents
745
01:03:09,899 --> 01:03:14,939
Alsullnlhhli”
746
01:03:15,405 --> 01:03:19,911
and followed the God
of that religion alone
747
01:03:20,577 --> 01:03:24,286
What was my religion,
who was my God?
748
01:03:24,781 --> 01:03:27,625
To find the remote
I had to know my God
749
01:03:43,466 --> 01:03:45,412
What are you doing?
750
01:03:45,635 --> 01:03:47,308
Where is the label?
751
01:03:47,504 --> 01:03:49,347
What label?
752
01:03:49,806 --> 01:03:51,479
The Religion label
753
01:03:52,408 --> 01:03:54,945
How do you know which
Company he belongs to?
754
01:03:55,578 --> 01:03:58,058
Where does God
label them?
755
01:03:58,748 --> 01:03:59,726
Security!
756
01:04:07,257 --> 01:04:09,760
Fillfl#
1&1
757
01:04:10,393 --> 01:04:15,274
So I decided to
worship all Gods
758
01:04:15,465 --> 01:04:19,277
One of them would be
my God, who'd help me
759
01:04:19,469 --> 01:04:25,784
It's You who governs
The world! hear
760
01:04:26,276 --> 01:04:31,954
Do listen to my plea
My home beckons me
761
01:04:32,448 --> 01:04:37,625
God where are You
762
01:04:39,289 --> 01:04:45,001
Tell me where are You
763
01:04:46,296 --> 01:04:52,804
You guide back to sanity
Those who've lost their way
764
01:04:52,869 --> 01:04:58,945
I too am completely lost
Guide me too, I pray
765
01:04:59,442 --> 01:05:04,482
God where are You
766
01:05:05,949 --> 01:05:11,831
Tell me where are You
767
01:05:39,582 --> 01:05:42,586
Shah' I worship You
in temples
768
01:05:42,986 --> 01:05:45,967
In mosques
do my faith I show
769
01:05:46,389 --> 01:05:52,396
Or to a gurudwara
would You like me to go
770
01:05:52,996 --> 01:05:59,641
Temples and churches,
I looked everywhere
771
01:05:59,836 --> 01:06:05,809
My hope now,
has turned to despair
772
01:06:06,576 --> 01:06:11,753
My hope now,
has turned to despair
773
01:06:13,416 --> 01:06:19,423
My hope now,
has turned to despair
774
01:06:23,559 --> 01:06:29,475
Not a single ritual
Did I ever flout
775
01:06:30,566 --> 01:06:36,448
Like millions around
I submit without a doubt
776
01:06:36,806 --> 01:06:41,778
God where are You
777
01:06:43,513 --> 01:06:48,587
Tell me where are You
778
01:07:16,946 --> 01:07:23,488
You have many names
And many faces too
779
01:07:23,786 --> 01:07:29,862
I've walked each of the myriad
paths which lead to You
780
01:07:30,560 --> 01:07:36,704
In no shrine did I find You
781
01:07:37,300 --> 01:07:42,409
What else should I do
To find you give a clue
782
01:07:43,906 --> 01:07:49,379
What else should I do
To find you give a clue
783
01:07:50,847 --> 01:07:56,320
What else should I do
To find you give a clue
784
01:08:01,324 --> 01:08:06,933
I blindly follow and
With reverence treasure
785
01:08:07,897 --> 01:08:13,745
Your every whim and fancy
In more than ample measure
786
01:08:14,404 --> 01:08:18,819
God where are you
787
01:08:20,877 --> 01:08:25,417
Tel! me where are you
788
01:08:27,717 --> 01:08:32,860
God where are you
789
01:08:34,490 --> 01:08:40,702
Tel! me where are you
790
01:08:49,839 --> 01:08:52,877
God - I'm all confused
791
01:08:54,710 --> 01:08:59,489
vacuum-m
Vhumwvuammyun?
792
01:09:00,917 --> 01:09:03,557
Understand my plight
793
01:09:03,953 --> 01:09:06,263
Give me some guidance
794
01:09:06,656 --> 01:09:08,658
Please
795
01:09:10,960 --> 01:09:13,497
Shall I talk to you
with hands clasped,
796
01:09:13,796 --> 01:09:18,802
or on bent knees,
head to the ground?
797
01:09:21,270 --> 01:09:23,409
Do I wake you
with temple bells?
798
01:09:23,739 --> 01:09:25,719
Or call out on a loudspeaker?
799
01:09:26,742 --> 01:09:32,249
The Geeta, the Quran,
the Bible - what do I read?
800
01:09:32,682 --> 01:09:36,687
Your different managers
say different things
801
01:09:37,353 --> 01:09:41,824
Some insist fast on Monday,
others urge on Tuesday
802
01:09:42,358 --> 01:09:47,273
Some forbid food after sunset,
some after sunrise
803
01:09:47,897 --> 01:09:51,845
Some say, worship the cow.
Others say slaughter her
804
01:09:52,568 --> 01:09:57,984
Some send me barefoot to the temple,
some wearing shoes to the church
805
01:09:58,474 --> 01:10:01,284
What is right,
what is wrong
806
01:10:01,577 --> 01:10:03,887
I am clueless
807
01:10:05,581 --> 01:10:08,323
I'm at breaking point
808
01:10:10,586 --> 01:10:12,725
I want to go home
809
01:10:13,289 --> 01:10:17,499
I'll do whatever you ask.
Just get me home
810
01:10:17,827 --> 01:10:19,704
Please
811
01:10:21,397 --> 01:10:23,343
Say something
812
01:10:24,333 --> 01:10:26,313
At least one of you...
813
01:10:26,936 --> 01:10:29,348
...give me some answer
814
01:10:29,605 --> 01:10:30,948
Please
815
01:10:32,975 --> 01:10:34,545
Please
816
01:10:36,078 --> 01:10:37,887
Please
817
01:10:48,891 --> 01:10:51,838
Missing: God
818
01:10:58,634 --> 01:11:00,341
Missing: God
819
01:11:09,445 --> 01:11:10,423
Missing: God
820
01:11:45,781 --> 01:11:47,454
Why the lock man?
821
01:11:47,516 --> 01:11:49,553
I gotcha today
822
01:11:50,319 --> 01:11:51,457
llhollinl
"U Qty]
823
01:11:51,520 --> 01:11:53,591
Lord Shiva, slayer of sins
824
01:11:53,990 --> 01:11:55,435
who fears none
825
01:11:55,791 --> 01:11:58,328
w?“
'.701?
826
01:11:58,394 --> 01:12:00,499
Don't you recognize me?
827
01:12:00,963 --> 01:12:03,273
I'm Tipsy!
828
01:12:04,567 --> 01:12:06,877
Where the hell is security?
829
01:12:07,269 --> 01:12:10,716
Do I perform
for boozards in the toilet?
830
01:12:12,408 --> 01:12:14,547
Unlock that door now!
831
01:12:14,710 --> 01:12:16,417
My remote first!
832
01:12:16,479 --> 01:12:19,688
- What remote?
- Of my spaceship
833
01:12:19,982 --> 01:12:21,290
Spun... din?
834
01:12:21,484 --> 01:12:24,761
Memory loss?
For the zillionth time,
835
01:12:25,321 --> 01:12:27,995
I'm not from here.
I'm from a far off planet
836
01:12:28,324 --> 01:12:29,394
Smooch!
837
01:12:29,592 --> 01:12:33,506
Gimme my remote,
and I go home. Got it?
838
01:12:33,929 --> 01:12:37,308
Brother let me go.
I've little kids at home
839
01:12:37,333 --> 01:12:39,745
“Incl
Yulfimulilnfilb
840
01:12:39,802 --> 01:12:42,578
Both are centuries old.
They can be home alone
841
01:12:42,638 --> 01:12:45,380
First my remote,
then your family reunion
842
01:12:46,308 --> 01:12:47,787
Oh God, save me please...
843
01:12:47,877 --> 01:12:49,550
There's a God
above you too?
844
01:12:49,612 --> 01:12:50,886
Lord Shiva, help
845
01:12:50,980 --> 01:12:52,789
Where?
846
01:12:54,817 --> 01:12:58,424
NovlpllllHUllnfinQdSINQ,
thalamus
847
01:12:58,487 --> 01:12:59,591
Help!
848
01:13:00,056 --> 01:13:01,000
Help!
849
01:13:03,259 --> 01:13:04,465
Help!
850
01:13:11,267 --> 01:13:13,713
Help!
851
01:13:14,804 --> 01:13:15,805
Help!
852
01:13:32,822 --> 01:13:36,326
Hail Lord Shiva
853
01:13:54,944 --> 01:13:58,790
Hail Lord Shiva
854
01:13:59,448 --> 01:14:04,955
I was meditating on the
snowy peaks of the Himalayas
855
01:14:05,421 --> 01:14:08,595
when, suddenly - light!
856
01:14:08,891 --> 01:14:11,269
Dazzling light!
857
01:14:11,861 --> 01:14:17,311
It came from a bead
lying in the snow
858
01:14:17,967 --> 01:14:22,541
I shut my eyes
and invoked God
859
01:14:22,605 --> 01:14:25,677
Next moment,
I was connected
860
01:14:25,741 --> 01:14:28,585
laid,
'Gd-IIUIIIIIII.'
861
01:14:28,811 --> 01:14:31,279
What is this
miraculous object,
862
01:14:31,280 --> 01:14:34,454
even iiss cold?
863
01:14:34,917 --> 01:14:36,294
God said,
864
01:14:36,318 --> 01:14:41,028
it's a divine bead
from Lord Shiva's necklace
865
01:14:41,290 --> 01:14:47,036
Take it and enshrine it
in a grand temple
866
01:14:47,363 --> 01:14:53,746
Sighting this bead
will heal all suffering
867
01:14:53,803 --> 01:14:56,647
Hail Lord Shiva
868
01:14:57,439 --> 01:14:59,817
Are you ready
for the sighting?
869
01:15:00,309 --> 01:15:02,983
The divine bead from
Lord Shiva's necklace!
870
01:15:06,782 --> 01:15:11,390
Hail Lord Shiva
871
01:15:11,887 --> 01:15:15,994
Hail Lord Shiva
872
01:15:24,900 --> 01:15:27,540
Hail Lord Shiva
873
01:15:27,837 --> 01:15:29,714
Hail Lord Shiva
874
01:15:29,905 --> 01:15:30,815
Q!!-
875
01:15:30,873 --> 01:15:35,288
Let him through.
He's awed by the sight
876
01:15:35,311 --> 01:15:37,313
&In.
d-flumlfiin
877
01:15:37,379 --> 01:15:40,519
Not there child.
Come here
878
01:15:40,783 --> 01:15:42,626
Express your ecstasy
879
01:15:42,751 --> 01:15:44,992
Hail Lord Shiva
880
01:15:45,387 --> 01:15:48,800
Hail Lord Shiva
881
01:15:49,291 --> 01:15:51,601
God, where are you?
Please step out,
882
01:15:51,627 --> 01:15:53,868
I want to thank you
883
01:15:55,297 --> 01:15:56,708
He's right here
884
01:15:57,032 --> 01:15:58,807
I met Him in the toilet
885
01:15:58,868 --> 01:16:01,508
I asked for my property
and He bolted
886
01:16:01,770 --> 01:16:03,647
I thought He vamoosed
887
01:16:03,906 --> 01:16:07,581
Bulnol
l-lolndmobnqplupully
888
01:16:07,810 --> 01:16:10,347
Hail Lord Shiva
889
01:16:11,280 --> 01:16:13,351
This isn't Lord Shiva's bead
890
01:16:13,515 --> 01:16:16,462
“WM:
m”?
891
01:16:16,518 --> 01:16:18,520
Your bead must be
misdelivered too
892
01:16:18,754 --> 01:16:23,567
Ask God, He is right here.
God, do step forward, clarify
893
01:16:25,594 --> 01:16:28,541
fljllqrplllllllfl'
894
01:16:30,532 --> 01:16:33,513
'flflulifl
Vlfnyuflfliqnil?
895
01:16:35,504 --> 01:16:39,418
Hail Lord Shiva
896
01:17:39,301 --> 01:17:44,808
Since when have you felt
you're from another planet?
897
01:17:47,009 --> 01:17:53,324
Listen. You need to see
a psychiatrist
898
01:17:54,316 --> 01:17:58,423
Time up! Rs 500 can buy
only this much jail time
899
01:18:05,260 --> 01:18:07,262
Here's my card
900
01:18:07,830 --> 01:18:11,903
My number's on it. I'll get you
an appointment if you wish
901
01:18:12,434 --> 01:18:14,880
Feel free to call. Okay?
902
01:18:16,271 --> 01:18:17,944
Take care
903
01:18:19,908 --> 01:18:22,252
Thank you officer Pandey
904
01:18:23,746 --> 01:18:26,784
You don't believe my story?
905
01:18:28,884 --> 01:18:33,264
Then go back to
the suicidal dog, Nikku
906
01:18:33,689 --> 01:18:36,295
That's the story for you
907
01:18:42,865 --> 01:18:46,574
I need to go back in
for 2 minutes
908
01:18:47,369 --> 01:18:50,543
(Immunity-ch
909
01:18:50,939 --> 01:18:55,752
Another Rs 500,
he's all yours
910
01:18:55,944 --> 01:18:59,619
When did I mention Nikku,
the suicidal dog?
911
01:19:00,015 --> 01:19:01,653
You didn't
912
01:19:01,917 --> 01:19:03,828
So how do you know?
913
01:19:04,286 --> 01:19:08,962
When you held my hands,
I read your thoughts
914
01:19:09,958 --> 01:19:11,733
You thought:
this story is dead
915
01:19:11,894 --> 01:19:13,498
I got to live with the
Nikku story
916
01:19:13,695 --> 01:19:16,642
917
01:19:16,765 --> 01:19:20,235
I cannot lie.
Lies need language
918
01:19:20,402 --> 01:19:23,872
lnlbllnlul g-imll I
919
01:19:24,873 --> 01:19:26,318
- Gilln0yullhflll.
920
01:19:26,442 --> 01:19:28,649
413w;
mm
921
01:19:28,877 --> 01:19:34,259
My wife's ill. Hospital wants
a deposit of Rs 10,000
922
01:19:34,416 --> 01:19:38,626
I'm Rs 500 short
If you can help...
923
01:19:38,754 --> 01:19:40,427
I'll give you
924
01:19:41,256 --> 01:19:42,360
Here
925
01:19:42,458 --> 01:19:45,268
Give your address.
I'll courier a check
926
01:19:45,294 --> 01:19:48,434
can-inu- $11.9' I
927
01:19:48,597 --> 01:19:50,338
flunk!!!"
928
01:19:51,266 --> 01:19:52,370
Sir...
929
01:19:52,868 --> 01:19:55,906
l-lnldaclclhlrk 1%.
Forlholb
930
01:19:58,273 --> 01:20:00,310
Bless you
931
01:20:01,410 --> 01:20:05,324
You are 'reader
932
01:20:05,547 --> 01:20:10,621
Yhugdoollld.
flllnbnohoupfllulndhllu
933
01:20:10,819 --> 01:20:12,298
I know!
934
01:20:12,387 --> 01:20:15,300
He's gifting his wife
a five star dinner
935
01:20:15,324 --> 01:20:17,463
It's her 75th birthday
936
01:20:17,526 --> 01:20:20,370
She'd never been
to a fancy place
937
01:20:20,529 --> 01:20:23,408
He's been saving from
his pension for months
938
01:20:23,499 --> 01:20:26,844
She ordered ice-cream
and his budget went kaput
939
01:20:26,935 --> 01:20:29,882
With a restroom excuse,
he ran out for some bucks
940
01:20:29,905 --> 01:20:31,475
Another yarn!
941
01:20:32,541 --> 01:20:35,750
On our planet, we don't lie
942
01:20:36,678 --> 01:20:38,487
Anyway, it's up t0 You
943
01:21:38,907 --> 01:21:40,511
-l-lln.
- Tllkyou8l'
944
01:21:40,576 --> 01:21:43,318
One moment. Tip him
945
01:21:43,478 --> 01:21:47,893
Why hold back -
it's your birthday!
946
01:21:48,050 --> 01:21:49,324
Flunk!!!"
947
01:22:18,280 --> 01:22:20,317
Address: Step-well ruins
948
01:22:44,640 --> 01:22:47,917
cvunnw - .-
949
01:22:49,945 --> 01:22:52,357
Hope you haven't told anyone...
950
01:22:59,354 --> 01:23:01,334
...that you're an alien?
951
01:23:01,523 --> 01:23:02,695
No way!
952
01:23:02,858 --> 01:23:07,637
They'd lock me in a lab,
and rip me up for research!
953
01:23:09,564 --> 01:23:12,408
How come you told me?
954
01:23:13,869 --> 01:23:15,576
Evuriloo
ladlootmllloplmd
955
01:23:15,771 --> 01:23:18,775
everyone has taken
money from me
956
01:23:18,974 --> 01:23:22,478
You were the first to give it up
for me - dumping Rs 5,000 in a box
957
01:23:22,978 --> 01:23:26,653
'"'".'*...":.".:.:.'::.""'-
958
01:23:30,018 --> 01:23:32,555
I'll get your remote back, Tipsy
959
01:23:33,755 --> 01:23:35,325
How?
960
01:23:35,624 --> 01:23:39,731
I haven't figured it out yet,
but you'll go back home
961
01:23:40,028 --> 01:23:42,474
That's my promise
962
01:24:06,402 --> 01:24:08,473
What are you goggling at?
963
01:24:08,904 --> 01:24:09,939
Yo u
964
01:24:10,939 --> 01:24:13,351
Aliens don't drop by everyday
965
01:24:14,576 --> 01:24:18,718
Everyone on your planet
has stick-out ears?
966
01:24:20,916 --> 01:24:22,452
Yup, ditto
967
01:24:22,518 --> 01:24:27,558
And theylsrioil? naked?
968
01:24:28,090 --> 01:24:31,799
That crow is naked -
does he look weird?
969
01:24:32,027 --> 01:24:35,406
If he dons a tie,
he'd look weird
970
01:24:37,433 --> 01:24:40,414
Tipsy, I was awake all night...
971
01:24:41,303 --> 01:24:44,409
...thinking how to get
your remote back
972
01:24:45,307 --> 01:24:45,944
Hello
973
01:24:46,308 --> 01:24:48,914
Connect to Balbir Singh.
Room No. 4
974
01:24:49,511 --> 01:24:50,649
Wrong number
975
01:24:51,046 --> 01:24:52,753
Isn't this Foflis Hospital?
976
01:24:53,015 --> 01:24:55,928
Since yesterday you've been
dialing this wrong number
977
01:24:55,951 --> 01:25:00,024
mpouflalil
ngnuvnmflflfl“
978
01:25:01,323 --> 01:25:03,769
So how do we get
the remote?
979
01:25:06,962 --> 01:25:09,806
Connect to Balbir Singh.
Room No. 4
980
01:25:09,865 --> 01:25:12,869
Sorry, Sir.
You've called too late
981
01:25:13,335 --> 01:25:15,008
Balbir died this morning
982
01:25:15,537 --> 01:25:19,644
Huh! How can a
piles surgery be fatal?
983
01:25:19,908 --> 01:25:22,445
Embarrassing,
but don't worn]
984
01:25:22,678 --> 01:25:24,817
Death Certificate
will say heart attack
985
01:25:25,013 --> 01:25:26,993
so the family saves face
986
01:25:27,416 --> 01:25:29,521
.comohlhlll0fl-
- GIIIUVW
987
01:25:29,818 --> 01:25:31,661
Ok, bye
988
01:25:34,523 --> 01:25:35,968
Why did you say that?
989
01:25:36,358 --> 01:25:37,701
Doling out joy
990
01:25:37,860 --> 01:25:41,831
When he finds his friend alive,
imagine his joy!
991
01:25:41,897 --> 01:25:42,841
What!
992
01:25:42,965 --> 01:25:47,311
I was sick of his calls.
Sol played a prank
993
01:25:47,770 --> 01:25:50,979
- T“: wl
994
01:25:57,913 --> 01:25:59,483
I got it!
995
01:26:00,482 --> 01:26:03,725
Someone is playing pranks
996
01:26:04,019 --> 01:26:06,590
When His Holiness dials God,
997
01:26:06,855 --> 01:26:10,029
cocking his head,
'God, enlighten me',
998
01:26:10,425 --> 01:26:12,564
his calls are going
to a Wrong Number
999
01:26:12,928 --> 01:26:15,841
Someone out there
plays pranks
1000
01:26:16,031 --> 01:26:20,070
The real God won't call
my remote a bead
1001
01:26:21,503 --> 01:26:28,352
Looks like the phone lines
to God have gone kaput
1002
01:26:28,577 --> 01:26:30,921
All calls to God are going
to a 'x/Vrong Number!
1003
01:26:31,346 --> 01:26:32,654
As in?
1004
01:26:32,714 --> 01:26:37,060
Think - would the real God
give such weird solutions?
1005
01:26:37,619 --> 01:26:41,499
Like - come rolling to me,
then I'll help you!
1006
01:26:41,790 --> 01:26:44,293
Aren't we God's children?
1007
01:26:44,459 --> 01:26:49,636
Vllfllfllflllilhlhfl
Illlfltllh?
1008
01:26:50,299 --> 01:26:55,305
Your Dad ever said - kiddo,
want a new dress? Stan rolling!
1009
01:26:55,971 --> 01:27:00,511
Another prank - bathe me
with cow's milk! What bull!
1010
01:27:00,976 --> 01:27:07,018
And if these calls went to
the real God, what would He say?
1011
01:27:07,416 --> 01:27:12,024
He'd say - millions of my children
are starving on streets
1012
01:27:12,421 --> 01:27:15,459
Gwolhnlnni.
Dolflflronnnhlbaolhovm
1013
01:27:15,891 --> 01:27:19,566
I'm sure someone's playing
pranks, like you just did
1014
01:27:19,995 --> 01:27:22,839
Tipsy thought His Holiness
was a victim of pranks
1015
01:27:23,065 --> 01:27:25,045
I didn't clear his confusion
1016
01:27:25,534 --> 01:27:28,344
for a crazy idea was
forming in my head
1017
01:27:28,537 --> 01:27:32,417
An idea that would
get back Tipsy's remote
1018
01:27:33,442 --> 01:27:34,546
Who's this Tipsy?
1019
01:27:35,043 --> 01:27:36,954
That's a mystery
1020
01:27:37,346 --> 01:27:40,054
But the way he sees
this world is unique
1021
01:27:40,449 --> 01:27:43,623
- A0h?
dlholflvyoullmkiq,
1022
01:27:43,886 --> 01:27:46,457
he'd call the cops to say
you're attempting suicide
1023
01:27:46,722 --> 01:27:47,427
Why'?
1024
01:27:47,489 --> 01:27:50,561
The pack says 'Smoking Kills'
yet you puff away
1025
01:27:51,927 --> 01:27:53,907
So what's the big idea?
1026
01:27:55,697 --> 01:27:56,971
Face-off
1027
01:27:57,432 --> 01:28:00,311
'Ibqrtllll-kl-IIIBIIZ.
1028
01:28:00,636 --> 01:28:03,412
We'll take
the face-off to I V
1029
01:28:03,872 --> 01:28:06,352
Ratings will go
through the roof!
1030
01:28:06,975 --> 01:28:09,819
I have three trident marks
on my right bum
1031
01:28:10,345 --> 01:28:12,882
You want three more on my
left for balance?
1032
01:28:13,348 --> 01:28:14,326
Don't worry
1033
01:28:14,416 --> 01:28:19,456
Tipsy won't fight His Holiness
but gently explain, that...
1034
01:28:19,788 --> 01:28:22,826
"lkollaaollflbgoiqb
1035
01:28:23,392 --> 01:28:26,373
His Holiness will be stumped
1036
01:28:26,862 --> 01:28:27,670
Cherry!
1037
01:28:27,996 --> 01:28:31,534
Tipsy's here.
Just meet him once
1038
01:28:31,867 --> 01:28:34,404
I bet his queries
will baffle you
1039
01:28:34,670 --> 01:28:36,377
Trust me. Please!
1040
01:28:46,848 --> 01:28:48,759
Excuse me,
you dropped this
1041
01:28:48,817 --> 01:28:50,319
Oh, thank you
1042
01:28:53,722 --> 01:28:55,895
That's not mine
1043
01:28:57,459 --> 01:29:00,303
Kamasutra condoms,
strawberry flavor
1044
01:29:01,563 --> 01:29:04,567
I hate strawberries, man.
Ask these guys
1045
01:29:04,900 --> 01:29:07,403
It's not mine.
Buzzed bozo!
1046
01:29:09,571 --> 01:29:11,778
- Ma'am, yours?
- How dare you!
1047
01:29:11,974 --> 01:29:16,354
- Check your purse if it's missing.
- Shameless cad!
1048
01:29:17,312 --> 01:29:20,020
- Has to be yours.
- No, not mine
1049
01:29:20,449 --> 01:29:22,019
Tipsy, it's his
1050
01:29:22,417 --> 01:29:26,832
Ask him all you want
to know about it. Come on in
1051
01:29:31,326 --> 01:29:32,430
What's this?
1052
01:29:33,495 --> 01:29:34,997
It's a condom
1053
01:29:35,397 --> 01:29:40,073
dllldoaoldo?
- Oolllnhlhowullrhpoplflloln
1054
01:29:40,702 --> 01:29:41,703
How?
1055
01:29:42,270 --> 01:29:46,548
It has to be worn
while having sex
1056
01:29:48,844 --> 01:29:51,984
How does your wearing it
control the world's population?
1057
01:29:52,280 --> 01:29:55,454
Not just me...
millions wear it
1058
01:29:55,650 --> 01:29:57,630
They all borrow it from you?
1059
01:29:57,819 --> 01:29:59,696
No. Everyone has it
1060
01:29:59,988 --> 01:30:03,868
- I've a question
- Go on Tipsy, shoot
1061
01:30:04,292 --> 01:30:08,468
If money is dropped,
all run for it
1062
01:30:08,563 --> 01:30:13,842
If a condom is dropped,
all run away from it. Why?
1063
01:30:14,403 --> 01:30:16,747
Sex is a very private matter
1064
01:30:16,872 --> 01:30:18,351
Why'?
1065
01:30:18,473 --> 01:30:21,852
You don't tell the whole town -
I'm having sex today
1066
01:30:22,344 --> 01:30:27,350
But, then at weddings,
with fireworks and music bands
1067
01:30:27,382 --> 01:30:32,354
why do they tell the whole town -
I'm having sex today?
1068
01:30:34,456 --> 01:30:35,799
What's the matter?
1069
01:30:36,558 --> 01:30:41,530
I have no answer for you
but I have a job for you
1070
01:30:42,464 --> 01:30:43,943
Thank you!
1071
01:30:44,933 --> 01:30:48,540
Let's beat it before
he changes his mind
1072
01:30:50,472 --> 01:30:52,918
Shield your holy bum,
Your Holiness
1073
01:30:53,275 --> 01:30:55,277
My trident is on its way
1074
01:30:59,014 --> 01:31:02,587
At this place His Holiness
connects his devotees to God
1075
01:31:02,717 --> 01:31:04,560
for solutions to their woes
1076
01:31:04,886 --> 01:31:07,765
Listen carefully to his calls
1077
01:31:07,856 --> 01:31:14,330
If you think the calls are going
to a Wrong Number, alefl him
1078
01:31:14,663 --> 01:31:18,304
- Will that get me my remote?
- Once he realises...
1079
01:31:18,366 --> 01:31:22,906
...the bead story is a prank
he'll return your remote
1080
01:31:22,971 --> 01:31:26,043
Good plan. Let's go
1081
01:31:27,509 --> 01:31:30,581
hluldllnlmlononnom
lonhofydood
1082
01:31:30,645 --> 01:31:35,321
To build a home for God
is the holiest deed
1083
01:31:35,717 --> 01:31:38,425
So donate for the temple
1084
01:31:38,620 --> 01:31:41,430
yulrlnlnnnllno
1085
01:31:42,257 --> 01:31:45,727
Son, voice your woe
1086
01:31:46,695 --> 01:31:48,003
Your Holiness,
1087
01:31:48,730 --> 01:31:51,336
my wife's been paralyzed
for six months
1088
01:31:51,600 --> 01:31:55,343
The doctors have given up.
What shall I...
1089
01:31:56,805 --> 01:31:58,443
God
1090
01:31:59,274 --> 01:32:00,548
Enlighten me
1091
01:32:07,616 --> 01:32:08,959
Yin...
1092
01:32:12,387 --> 01:32:14,560
What place?
1093
01:32:19,394 --> 01:32:21,374
What transport?
1094
01:32:23,899 --> 01:32:26,345
Your wish is our command
1095
01:32:28,970 --> 01:32:31,610
Have you heard of
the Rathong glacier?
1096
01:32:31,673 --> 01:32:32,879
L\l0
1097
01:32:33,375 --> 01:32:37,790
It's in the Himalayas.
Take a train to Silliguri
1098
01:32:38,613 --> 01:32:41,389
then a bus to Gangtok
1099
01:32:42,250 --> 01:32:46,699
then an eight day trek
1100
01:32:47,322 --> 01:32:51,828
You'll reach a grand temple
1101
01:32:52,761 --> 01:32:55,935
'IIIIIIIIIIIBIIIIIIIIIIQQQIQQq
1102
01:32:56,264 --> 01:32:58,574
'x/Vrong Number!
This is a 'x/Vrong Number!
1103
01:32:58,867 --> 01:33:00,744
- L
1104
01:33:01,002 --> 01:33:06,452
Your Holiness, your phone line
to God has gone kaput
1105
01:33:07,275 --> 01:33:09,346
Your calls are going to
a 'x/Vrong Number
1106
01:33:09,544 --> 01:33:13,390
and a fake God is
playing pranks
1107
01:33:13,515 --> 01:33:16,724
What are you trying to say?
1108
01:33:16,985 --> 01:33:19,898
Flil.
Niflilfilhi?
1109
01:33:20,589 --> 01:33:21,567
Yes, so?
1110
01:33:21,756 --> 01:33:25,499
Say your kid's in a jam
and comes to you
1111
01:33:25,827 --> 01:33:28,569
Will you help promptly,
or will you say
1112
01:33:28,697 --> 01:33:31,974
kiddo, I've another house
2,000 miles away
1113
01:33:32,300 --> 01:33:35,338
Come there, tell me
the same problem again
1114
01:33:35,537 --> 01:33:37,915
Then I'll solve it.
What bull!
1115
01:33:38,340 --> 01:33:43,551
If the call went to real God, He'd
say: Son, tend to your ailing wife,
1116
01:33:43,878 --> 01:33:46,358
don't run after me
1117
01:33:46,548 --> 01:33:49,552
kin
yuflulmbnnlquq
1118
01:33:49,684 --> 01:33:53,393
give her your time now. Right?
1119
01:33:57,592 --> 01:34:00,038
I can prove it's a prank
1120
01:34:00,362 --> 01:34:03,605
Call this fake God
again and ask
1121
01:34:03,865 --> 01:34:06,471
What's the guarantee
she will get well
1122
01:34:06,668 --> 01:34:10,741
Sir, till you get it in writing,
don't leave her side
1123
01:34:10,905 --> 01:34:13,886
Just call,
and clear all doubt
1124
01:34:14,843 --> 01:34:18,086
Icllnlfl-bfii
hi km
1125
01:34:19,848 --> 01:34:28,962
Praise be to God
Glory be to God
1126
01:34:31,660 --> 01:34:36,632
This fake God is passing off
my property as a holy bead
1127
01:34:36,931 --> 01:34:39,878
He's playing a prank
1128
01:34:41,369 --> 01:34:43,906
He is no God.
He is a fraud
1129
01:34:44,572 --> 01:34:46,574
He is a FRAUD
1130
01:34:46,775 --> 01:34:50,450
God doesn't talk
to us mortals
1131
01:34:51,012 --> 01:34:54,721
He communicates
through His managers
1132
01:34:55,317 --> 01:34:58,662
Jhqlmlfludlhhqndhln.
4M1?
1133
01:35:00,055 --> 01:35:03,434
Is God really talking
to the managers?
1134
01:35:03,491 --> 01:35:04,401
L\l0
1135
01:35:04,459 --> 01:35:08,669
So where do the commands
for us come from?
1136
01:35:08,963 --> 01:35:12,638
- From a 'x/Vrong Number!
- So what should the public do?
1137
01:35:12,834 --> 01:35:16,646
Till phone lines are fixed,
don't depend on God's managers
1138
01:35:16,705 --> 01:35:19,413
Help each other
in difficult times
1139
01:35:19,708 --> 01:35:26,785
A great tip from Tipsy:
Don't rely on God's managers
1140
01:35:26,981 --> 01:35:29,985
Rely on each other
1141
01:35:32,087 --> 01:35:35,933
Hail Lord Shiva
1142
01:35:37,359 --> 01:35:41,739
Tipsy says don't make the temple,
the bead belongs to him
1143
01:35:41,863 --> 01:35:43,934
What's in your pocket?
1144
01:35:46,468 --> 01:35:49,312
A
1145
01:35:49,471 --> 01:35:53,613
- You- cogjggoenzlloizyohol?
1146
01:35:53,808 --> 01:35:57,017
You smoke cigarettes,
consume alcohol
1147
01:35:57,045 --> 01:36:00,754
despite knowing
their fatal effects
1148
01:36:01,616 --> 01:36:03,823
Governments
permit these poisons,
1149
01:36:04,352 --> 01:36:09,529
factories manufacture them,
stores sell them
1150
01:36:09,624 --> 01:36:11,797
Nobody questions this
1151
01:36:12,026 --> 01:36:19,638
But in this sacred land of
Lord Ram and Krishna
1152
01:36:19,734 --> 01:36:22,476
if I wish to build a temple
1153
01:36:23,338 --> 01:36:25,045
why these questions?
1154
01:36:25,874 --> 01:36:33,383
Why not question the man
who is trying to stall this temple?
1155
01:36:33,615 --> 01:36:35,356
Who's this Tipsy?
1156
01:36:35,717 --> 01:36:37,788
What's his real name?
1157
01:36:39,053 --> 01:36:43,297
Why's he hiding it?
Is he a Muslim?
1158
01:36:43,892 --> 01:36:48,307
If question you must,
go ask Tipsy
1159
01:36:48,329 --> 01:36:49,933
what is his religion?
1160
01:36:50,365 --> 01:36:54,609
Find out his religion,
Find out his faith
1161
01:36:57,505 --> 01:37:00,486
Centuries ago,
Mohammad of Ghazni
1162
01:37:01,342 --> 01:37:03,379
came and destroyed
our temples.
1163
01:37:03,845 --> 01:37:08,453
Today another invader
wants to repeat history
1164
01:37:08,616 --> 01:37:09,788
But we won't allow...
1165
01:37:36,711 --> 01:37:41,285
Your God asks my religion.
Let's ask Him...
1166
01:37:41,382 --> 01:37:43,726
...the religions of these people
1167
01:37:43,818 --> 01:37:48,289
- What nonsense?
- Call up your God!
1168
01:37:48,323 --> 01:37:52,772
Why bother God?
I'll tell you
1169
01:37:52,994 --> 01:37:54,905
This one is a Hindu.
He's a Christian...
1170
01:37:55,330 --> 01:37:56,934
n Sill, H! “n.
1171
01:37:57,332 --> 01:37:59,972
...that one is of your religion
1172
01:38:01,736 --> 01:38:04,444
Enlighten him
1173
01:38:04,839 --> 01:38:08,343
Hello. I'm Sikh
1174
01:38:08,576 --> 01:38:11,853
Greetings.
I'm Muslim
1175
01:38:12,313 --> 01:38:14,350
I'm Jain
1176
01:38:14,415 --> 01:38:16,793
H.
Uni
1177
01:38:17,418 --> 01:38:20,661
Hello! I'm Hindu
1178
01:38:21,322 --> 01:38:22,630
Bamboozled!
1179
01:38:22,924 --> 01:38:26,633
If Iwnnnoulllguuu-n.
1180
01:38:26,828 --> 01:38:28,830
Faith is connected
to fashion
1181
01:38:28,897 --> 01:38:32,003
Want a demo?
Check the math
1182
01:38:32,667 --> 01:38:35,409
Beard + moustache + turban = Sikh
1183
01:38:35,803 --> 01:38:38,511
Minus turban = Hindu
1184
01:38:38,673 --> 01:38:41,847
Minus moustache = Muslim!
1185
01:38:42,577 --> 01:38:45,581
This difference is
made by the fake God
1186
01:38:45,847 --> 01:38:48,327
If real God wanted it,
He'd put a label on us
1187
01:38:48,383 --> 01:38:51,387
dolhlnnfialolnyollhotfl
Jib?
1188
01:38:51,452 --> 01:38:54,558
Don't gape, strip and check!
1189
01:38:54,856 --> 01:38:56,802
Why be coy?
1190
01:38:57,392 --> 01:39:02,307
Fihiluyumilinibfii.
hllnlqflfll
1191
01:39:02,597 --> 01:39:06,511
Cut the coyness.
OK, I'll go first
1192
01:39:08,870 --> 01:39:11,510
See the bare facts
1193
01:39:12,640 --> 01:39:17,555
Is there a label?
1194
01:39:18,379 --> 01:39:19,858
Nothing! You see!
1195
01:39:20,048 --> 01:39:21,755
Check some more...
1196
01:39:22,350 --> 01:39:24,455
Remove this ruffian
1197
01:39:24,819 --> 01:39:27,925
"qr
rm"°"I'IIlluin
1198
01:39:28,022 --> 01:39:30,024
Stan the chants!
1199
01:39:30,391 --> 01:39:32,894
Praise be to God
Glory be to God
1200
01:39:33,027 --> 01:39:36,941
That's no divine bead
1201
01:39:44,839 --> 01:39:45,909
Jaggu!
1202
01:39:47,008 --> 01:39:48,510
Stop this farce!
1203
01:39:48,876 --> 01:39:49,877
Papa!
1204
01:39:52,313 --> 01:39:56,420
You were all of 40 days, when
His Holiness christened you
1205
01:39:56,551 --> 01:40:00,363
Remember, he who gives you
a name, can ruin it too
1206
01:40:00,922 --> 01:40:03,300
He named me
Jagat Janani
1207
01:40:03,524 --> 01:40:04,969
How can he ruin it further?
1208
01:40:05,360 --> 01:40:08,364
'H!
kmyuipho
1209
01:40:08,596 --> 01:40:09,301
Papa!
1210
01:40:09,464 --> 01:40:12,343
'Ilyiqtannflbl-Bl-lailinn
ioqclaltlnunqr
1211
01:40:12,500 --> 01:40:12,978
No, no
1212
01:40:13,401 --> 01:40:18,316
You'll burn in Hell!
Fear the wrath of God!
1213
01:40:23,378 --> 01:40:25,915
Flunk!!!"
1214
01:40:26,748 --> 01:40:30,389
I'd solved only half the puzzle.
You pieced it together
1215
01:40:30,585 --> 01:40:32,326
Fear is the key
1216
01:40:32,520 --> 01:40:37,833
The prankster is
cashing in on fear. Get it?
1217
01:40:38,426 --> 01:40:40,804
XII!-
lllloflljguatlli"'p$.?
1218
01:40:40,895 --> 01:40:44,866
'Ihuluflllctlplllllbi.
1219
01:40:46,267 --> 01:40:48,304
I don't have time
for this nonsense
1220
01:40:48,569 --> 01:40:52,574
If it turns out to be nonsense,
I'll call off the show
1221
01:41:05,420 --> 01:41:09,732
Exams are on at this college.
The students are scared stiff
1222
01:41:09,957 --> 01:41:14,906
I=__. F-Qr ii _
1223
01:41:26,040 --> 01:41:28,543
Machine installed
1224
01:41:33,581 --> 01:41:36,460
A little seed capital
1225
01:41:40,321 --> 01:41:43,791
Now the inauguration
1226
01:41:52,900 --> 01:41:57,815
'$1!
Qfichkhibwhb
1227
01:42:03,745 --> 01:42:05,315
Look there
1228
01:42:07,381 --> 01:42:08,917
The first customer!
1229
01:42:09,617 --> 01:42:12,894
Tea... piping hot tea
1230
01:42:13,387 --> 01:42:15,663
Check the investment
of the tea vendor
1231
01:42:15,957 --> 01:42:19,404
KIIJIJIIIJID.
Inna
1232
01:42:19,727 --> 01:42:23,402
Andhnn-
nmokmdnlndnlk
1233
01:42:23,598 --> 01:42:25,407
Hot and piping tea...
1234
01:42:25,566 --> 01:42:27,739
There, you gotta
woo the clients
1235
01:42:27,969 --> 01:42:30,848
Here you shoo them away
1236
01:42:30,972 --> 01:42:35,352
Hey, scram.
Give others a chance
1237
01:42:37,845 --> 01:42:40,325
There you bow
before the customer
1238
01:42:40,414 --> 01:42:42,690
Here the customer
bows before you
1239
01:42:45,286 --> 01:42:49,359
If he's in deep trouble,
he goes horizontal
1240
01:42:50,424 --> 01:42:54,804
The 'x/Vrong Number guy
trades in fear
1241
01:42:55,263 --> 01:42:58,301
He knows - those in dread
to the temple head
1242
01:42:58,900 --> 01:43:01,847
You too seem afraid!
Off with these...
1243
01:43:03,271 --> 01:43:05,717
Do not question religion
1244
01:43:06,374 --> 01:43:08,513
It's a matter of faith!
1245
01:43:08,709 --> 01:43:11,417
If God didn't want us
to raise questions
1246
01:43:11,512 --> 01:43:15,551
He wouldn't give us
the power to reason
1247
01:43:15,917 --> 01:43:19,763
Guardians of religion use violence
when they can't answer us
1248
01:43:19,921 --> 01:43:23,892
They scare us into silence.
But now we won't be silent
1249
01:43:24,325 --> 01:43:28,899
So far one Tipsy raised questions.
Now there'll be a thousand
1250
01:43:29,363 --> 01:43:31,843
Friends, pick up your phones
1251
01:43:32,300 --> 01:43:37,045
When you spot a Wrong Number,
shoot it and send it to us
1252
01:43:37,572 --> 01:43:39,779
We'll put it on IV
1253
01:43:40,308 --> 01:43:42,845
Dump your fear,
ask questions
1254
01:43:51,919 --> 01:43:53,865
Holy Sir!
1255
01:43:54,355 --> 01:43:55,595
One question
1256
01:43:55,656 --> 01:43:57,966
If you can conjure gold
from thin air
1257
01:43:58,359 --> 01:44:00,999
why don't you end
the nation's poverty?
1258
01:44:01,395 --> 01:44:03,341
Answer please
1259
01:44:03,931 --> 01:44:04,932
Holy Sir!
1260
01:44:04,999 --> 01:44:09,880
Since you're a walking gold mine,
why ask us for donations?
1261
01:44:12,406 --> 01:44:14,716
God is great!
1262
01:44:14,942 --> 01:44:17,354
This is a Wrong Number
1263
01:44:17,478 --> 01:44:20,925
- Jaggu... come with me
- Cherry give me a moment
1264
01:44:21,349 --> 01:44:25,058
Come with me
1265
01:44:25,353 --> 01:44:27,094
The 'x/Vrong Number idea
is a national rage
1266
01:44:27,655 --> 01:44:31,000
wan
Jaqunlnuuh
1267
01:44:36,530 --> 01:44:39,374
Guluaqb-tahlllajab,
bodacious
1268
01:44:39,567 --> 01:44:42,946
$I?
1269
01:44:43,304 --> 01:44:46,911
Tirpuil3ilccnllnlbklznalll?
1270
01:44:47,008 --> 01:44:48,316
Watch this one!
1271
01:44:48,609 --> 01:44:51,419
He says, convert to
Christianity, or be damned
1272
01:44:51,746 --> 01:44:55,455
If God wanted,
I'd be Christian by birth
1273
01:44:55,816 --> 01:44:59,025
Why convert now?
'x/Vrong Number
1274
01:44:59,553 --> 01:45:01,430
These girls want to
go to school
1275
01:45:01,689 --> 01:45:04,795
A new dictat says:
kill them if they do
1276
01:45:04,959 --> 01:45:09,635
ls God so small,
He'll deny children knowledge?
1277
01:45:10,331 --> 01:45:11,833
Wrong Number
1278
01:45:12,466 --> 01:45:15,811
'lfllitiaulliclnflilnulkynu
1279
01:45:16,337 --> 01:45:20,410
He has a master plan
for the Universe
1280
01:45:20,841 --> 01:45:22,582
Accept it
1281
01:45:22,777 --> 01:45:27,385
Your disciples say:
to get a male child,
1282
01:45:27,515 --> 01:45:31,930
buy this book,
and chant the mantras
1283
01:45:32,353 --> 01:45:35,800
So buy a Rs 10 book
1284
01:45:35,856 --> 01:45:39,702
Iii
Qfliij
1285
01:45:47,902 --> 01:45:52,044
Tipsy! Your show's a hit!
Messages are pouring in
1286
01:45:52,373 --> 01:45:53,977
Here's one more
1287
01:45:58,946 --> 01:46:00,323
What happened?
1288
01:46:01,015 --> 01:46:04,986
It's Papa. He's ashamed
I'm his daughter
1289
01:46:08,823 --> 01:46:11,531
I was in tenth grade
1290
01:46:12,727 --> 01:46:15,435
when I wrote my first poem
1291
01:46:15,997 --> 01:46:18,068
For Papa
1292
01:46:19,033 --> 01:46:24,540
Thlyiqyllrlilnllunulli.
1293
01:46:25,373 --> 01:46:28,513
But I'm my Daddy's girl
1294
01:46:28,809 --> 01:46:31,346
fill fl:_# I
1295
01:46:31,812 --> 01:46:33,849
All parents clapped
1296
01:46:34,348 --> 01:46:38,353
but one whistled with joy
1297
01:46:39,487 --> 01:46:43,492
The applause ended,
the whistling continued
1298
01:46:44,458 --> 01:46:45,937
It was Papa
1299
01:46:46,494 --> 01:46:48,531
He was so proud of me
1300
01:46:49,897 --> 01:46:54,471
And now this message.
Ashamed of you
1301
01:46:55,002 --> 01:47:00,350
There's a 'x/Vrong Number
in your Papa's head
1302
01:47:00,941 --> 01:47:06,584
The day he gets rid of it,
he'll whistle for you again
1303
01:47:06,947 --> 01:47:08,688
It won't happen
1304
01:47:09,350 --> 01:47:12,331
Don't be sad. Come with me
1305
01:47:12,353 --> 01:47:16,563
Onllqfiflvlllpuflinfl,
lnluvlfllqchfl
1306
01:47:16,924 --> 01:47:18,426
What?
1307
01:47:18,659 --> 01:47:21,435
Recharge the battery!
1308
01:47:21,662 --> 01:47:24,472
JMII
ulufloopymo
1309
01:47:29,603 --> 01:47:31,344
What are we doing?
1310
01:47:37,344 --> 01:47:38,948
Shut your eyes!
1311
01:47:39,046 --> 01:47:40,787
How do I copy then?
1312
01:47:40,848 --> 01:47:42,759
Nd!-
Knupllllnopm
1313
01:49:16,977 --> 01:49:19,981
To steal glances at you all day
1314
01:49:20,381 --> 01:49:23,021
To strain for every word you say
1315
01:49:23,484 --> 01:49:26,431
To put every chore aside
1316
01:49:26,687 --> 01:49:29,668
And follow your every stride
1317
01:49:29,823 --> 01:49:32,497
That's nothing but a
waste of time
1318
01:49:32,927 --> 01:49:35,771
Love is a waste of time
1319
01:49:36,330 --> 01:49:38,776
Amore is nothing more
1320
01:49:39,333 --> 01:49:42,280
Love is a waste of time
1321
01:49:42,670 --> 01:49:45,674
But my mind and heart insist
1322
01:49:45,873 --> 01:49:48,717
Once in this life at least
1323
01:49:49,276 --> 01:49:51,552
I must waste my time
1324
01:49:51,879 --> 01:49:54,621
Without reason or rhyme
1325
01:49:55,015 --> 01:49:57,894
I want to waste my time
1326
01:49:58,319 --> 01:50:00,822
I love this waste of time
1327
01:50:17,938 --> 01:50:22,409
A zillion peeps into the mirror
1328
01:50:24,378 --> 01:50:29,020
A million times
I've styled my hair
1329
01:50:30,818 --> 01:50:35,961
Countless sets of
clothes I've tried
1330
01:50:37,324 --> 01:50:41,739
Emptied perfume
bottles with flair
1331
01:50:43,397 --> 01:50:49,279
Dressing up is all I did
Did nothing else worthwhile
1332
01:50:49,937 --> 01:50:52,781
Now I understand
1333
01:50:53,007 --> 01:50:55,749
That love is waste of time
1334
01:50:56,277 --> 01:50:59,281
But my mind and heart insist
1335
01:50:59,480 --> 01:51:02,484
Once in this life at least
1336
01:51:02,750 --> 01:51:05,321
I must waste my time
1337
01:51:05,486 --> 01:51:08,365
Without reason or rhyme
1338
01:51:08,722 --> 01:51:11,601
I want to waste my time
1339
01:51:11,892 --> 01:51:15,305
I love this waste of time
1340
01:51:50,731 --> 01:51:55,407
My world has
topsy-turvy turned
1341
01:51:57,438 --> 01:52:02,387
I know not how to tell you
1342
01:52:03,744 --> 01:52:08,750
I smile without rhyme
or reason
1343
01:52:09,950 --> 01:52:14,626
What's happening
I have no clue
1344
01:52:16,457 --> 01:52:22,305
The mind just wants to soar
And from rooftops yeH
1345
01:52:22,796 --> 01:52:28,906
Now! understand
Love is a waste of time
1346
01:52:29,303 --> 01:52:32,409
But my mind and heart insist
1347
01:52:32,539 --> 01:52:35,452
Once in this life at least
1348
01:52:35,676 --> 01:52:37,849
I must waste my time
1349
01:52:38,746 --> 01:52:41,352
Without reason or rhyme
1350
01:52:41,515 --> 01:52:44,587
I want to waste my time
1351
01:52:44,818 --> 01:52:48,322
I love this waste of time
1352
01:53:27,861 --> 01:53:31,035
The donation box is getting
more questions than cash
1353
01:53:31,465 --> 01:53:36,380
Your relics don't sell anymore
1354
01:53:36,770 --> 01:53:40,877
Millions of abuses on
Facebook and Twitter
1355
01:53:42,443 --> 01:53:45,720
uludllvo?
- Tlnooduhlwpolt
1356
01:53:46,046 --> 01:53:48,026
The abuses are in here
1357
01:53:48,715 --> 01:53:54,893
It's time for action, Sir.
Avoiding the issue can be disastrous
1358
01:53:59,560 --> 01:54:01,062
Missing: God
1359
01:54:01,462 --> 01:54:02,873
Call Cherry Bajwa
1360
01:54:03,564 --> 01:54:07,444
Tipsy has asked many questions.
I'll ask him just one
1361
01:54:07,601 --> 01:54:10,548
- Hey Jaggu
- What happened?
1362
01:54:11,505 --> 01:54:14,918
His Holiness wants to come
on the show. To debate with Tipsy
1363
01:54:15,042 --> 01:54:17,818
- Tipsy'll rip him!
- It'll be a mother of a show!
1364
01:54:18,045 --> 01:54:21,515
Get Tipsy ready.
Put the promos out
1365
01:54:21,782 --> 01:54:25,594
'The Final Question'
Sunday 6:00 pm
1366
01:54:27,488 --> 01:54:31,959
Don't rnEEhljQeGIT-graaélfiuestfon '
1367
01:54:32,059 --> 01:54:36,906
My pal's become a star!
Hey look, he's a rock star
1368
01:54:37,030 --> 01:54:40,807
Rock star was
roaming butt naked
1369
01:54:41,001 --> 01:54:46,314
I made him a star.
The bloke's on TV
1370
01:54:46,740 --> 01:54:52,850
and me - in this shanty town,
this crappy shack
1371
01:54:53,313 --> 01:54:57,659
guzzling booze with
a jackass like you
1372
01:54:57,751 --> 01:54:59,924
Star my foot!
1373
01:55:15,969 --> 01:55:18,540
Tipsy, some
Bhairon Singh for you
1374
01:55:18,805 --> 01:55:19,909
Bhairon!
1375
01:55:20,040 --> 01:55:21,883
Take that line
1376
01:55:23,343 --> 01:55:25,653
- Bml
nmuuyu
1377
01:55:25,846 --> 01:55:27,826
You're a rock star!
1378
01:55:27,948 --> 01:55:30,360
Bro, where are you?
1379
01:55:30,450 --> 01:55:33,556
Inlhlfln.
Ooniqhbollhnnnun
1380
01:55:33,787 --> 01:55:36,563
With a gift for you
1381
01:55:36,890 --> 01:55:41,305
I've nabbed the thief
who stole your stuff
1382
01:55:41,562 --> 01:55:44,543
He sold it for 4O grand
1383
01:55:45,032 --> 01:55:47,376
-1hvlmn.
Jilin?
1384
01:55:47,834 --> 01:55:51,304
His Holiness!
1385
01:55:53,473 --> 01:56:00,448
God said." it's a divine bead
from Lord Shiva's necklace. Take it...
1386
01:56:00,881 --> 01:56:06,695
. and enshrine it in a grand tempie.Sighting this bead...
1387
01:56:06,853 --> 01:56:08,332
"II.
1388
01:56:09,523 --> 01:56:11,696
What happened?
1389
01:56:12,059 --> 01:56:15,871
The thief who stole
my remote is caught
1390
01:56:16,029 --> 01:56:17,531
What! Really?
1391
01:56:17,698 --> 01:56:23,046
Bro said, the thief sold it to
His Holiness
1392
01:56:23,337 --> 01:56:25,044
Then His Holiness is finished!
1393
01:56:25,772 --> 01:56:29,618
We'll tell him -
return the remote,
1394
01:56:29,876 --> 01:56:32,356
or the thief tells all on TV
1395
01:56:32,946 --> 01:56:38,521
So he didn't find my remote
in the Himalayas! He's lying
1396
01:56:39,519 --> 01:56:43,626
Wrong Numbers are not
floated by some fake God...
1397
01:56:44,024 --> 01:56:46,402
...but by His Holiness
1398
01:56:48,729 --> 01:56:51,005
You knew this Jaggu?
1399
01:56:51,298 --> 01:56:53,608
Remember the day
you mentioned 'x/Vrong Number
1400
01:56:53,867 --> 01:56:58,839
All his calls are going
to a Wrong Number
1401
01:56:59,039 --> 01:57:03,784
I knew then you were on the
wrong track. But I kept mum
1402
01:57:04,011 --> 01:57:07,788
If you'd called him a fraud,
people would have killed you
1403
01:57:07,948 --> 01:57:10,053
People crave for the unique
1404
01:57:10,384 --> 01:57:11,920
Wrong Number!
1405
01:57:12,319 --> 01:57:15,027
Your Wrong Number
concept was unique
1406
01:57:15,422 --> 01:57:17,902
Today the world supports you
1407
01:57:18,025 --> 01:57:22,667
Tipsy, my plan worked!
You're going home!
1408
01:57:27,401 --> 01:57:30,780
W-r-fl,' il-IIII"
1409
01:57:31,004 --> 01:57:33,848
“mil-III
1410
01:57:35,542 --> 01:57:38,421
We'll never meet again
1411
01:57:39,880 --> 01:57:42,952
There will be such a void
1412
01:57:44,284 --> 01:57:46,924
I'll really miss you
1413
01:57:48,689 --> 01:57:50,760
Shall I stay back?
1414
01:57:53,627 --> 01:57:56,301
How can you?
1415
01:57:56,963 --> 01:58:00,410
Simple,
I have a job
1416
01:58:00,867 --> 01:58:03,939
I'll get some ID made
and settle here
1417
01:58:04,438 --> 01:58:08,648
I'll find someone to
'waste time' with me
1418
01:58:09,309 --> 01:58:11,687
I'll marry her
1419
01:58:11,945 --> 01:58:14,687
wan
Angler:
1420
01:58:14,981 --> 01:58:19,521
Your wife will go nuts
introducing you -
1421
01:58:20,320 --> 01:58:23,858
Infill!-
ma..."
1422
01:58:24,825 --> 01:58:28,034
That's not my name!
1423
01:58:28,328 --> 01:58:30,934
'TUIIIYW
Jlgdlndnlno
1424
01:58:32,332 --> 01:58:37,975
W“ T111. Zqluyiigii? we?
1425
01:58:38,739 --> 01:58:44,417
A man's name must
match his personality
1426
01:58:44,611 --> 01:58:46,284
Right!
1427
01:58:46,413 --> 01:58:48,916
So how is my personality?
1428
01:58:49,349 --> 01:58:51,295
I'll explain
1429
01:58:51,852 --> 01:58:54,526
A poet once wrote...
1430
01:58:56,289 --> 01:58:59,293
Irony of mismatched names...
1431
01:58:59,459 --> 01:59:02,736
No poetry, please!
I've something to say
1432
01:59:03,396 --> 01:59:07,845
l/Vho says'What's in a name?'
1433
01:59:09,402 --> 01:59:13,043
fiyullkrlqfllbllalb,
1434
01:59:14,040 --> 01:59:17,988
Mr Burns is in fact so cool
1435
01:59:18,445 --> 01:59:21,324
With violence alone
Mr Peace does rule
1436
01:59:22,649 --> 01:59:28,327
His name is Mr Fox
But has no bushy tail
1437
01:59:29,322 --> 01:59:33,896
'Hamill-IQ'
1438
01:59:34,327 --> 01:59:38,332
One whole ton is the
weight of Mr Flower
1439
01:59:38,799 --> 01:59:42,611
At his mere sigh t,
the poor chair does cower
1440
01:59:42,769 --> 01:59:44,476
Very nice... very nice
1441
01:59:44,704 --> 01:59:48,311
Here's a bunch of cards
with different names
1442
01:59:48,608 --> 01:59:51,987
Pick the one you like
1443
01:59:52,312 --> 01:59:54,849
Dand u ram Thatte?
1444
01:59:55,382 --> 01:59:57,794
- Disaster!
- Next!
1445
01:59:58,552 --> 02:00:00,327
Tutari Singh?
1446
02:00:00,620 --> 02:00:02,395
Phooey!
1447
02:00:03,456 --> 02:00:04,958
Sarfaraz
1448
02:00:09,462 --> 02:00:11,999
-"-'lmu? I“
1449
02:00:12,399 --> 02:00:15,073
Keep going,
find a good name
1450
02:00:18,538 --> 02:00:20,040
What's the matter?
1451
02:00:20,740 --> 02:00:22,413
Nothing
1452
02:01:14,828 --> 02:01:16,739
'Hamill-IQ'
1453
02:01:30,844 --> 02:01:32,619
Brother!
1454
02:02:05,278 --> 02:02:08,851
God is in His Heaven
We mortals on ground
1455
02:02:09,316 --> 02:02:12,593
God is in His Heaven
We mortals on ground
1456
02:02:13,286 --> 02:02:17,291
Nowadays He doesn't have
Time to look around
1457
02:02:17,424 --> 02:02:21,429
God is in His Heaven
We mortals on ground
1458
02:02:29,502 --> 02:02:32,949
Whatever may happen here
He does not reprimand
1459
02:02:33,440 --> 02:02:37,445
Thousand evils, million wrongs
He does not take a stand
1460
02:02:37,644 --> 02:02:41,922
Plundering is all around
Bombs come to hound
1461
02:03:29,562 --> 02:03:32,907
A terrorist outfit has claimed
responsibility for the blast
1462
02:03:33,333 --> 02:03:36,473
They say this was
a mock driH
1463
02:03:36,936 --> 02:03:39,644
Persecute our people,
and real war will follow
1464
02:03:39,939 --> 02:03:42,920
We shall protect our God
1465
02:04:04,364 --> 02:04:06,537
Where are you
going, Tipsy?
1466
02:04:07,367 --> 02:04:08,573
On the show
1467
02:04:08,835 --> 02:04:10,872
You don't have to
1468
02:04:13,339 --> 02:04:15,785
1469
02:04:30,390 --> 02:04:35,635
'The Fina! Question'
Vkfelcome to our special show
1470
02:04:35,829 --> 02:04:37,399
in which we meet Tipsy...
1471
02:04:37,464 --> 02:04:39,501
Wait a minute
1472
02:04:45,371 --> 02:04:47,317
Bring it
1473
02:04:52,779 --> 02:04:54,588
What is this?
1474
02:04:54,848 --> 02:04:59,524
God says: it's a divine bead
from His necklace
1475
02:04:59,786 --> 02:05:03,427
This man claims,
it's his property
1476
02:05:04,324 --> 02:05:07,669
God says: build a temple
1477
02:05:08,328 --> 02:05:11,707
And this man opposes it
1478
02:05:11,931 --> 02:05:17,404
'Vxfho do I listen to?
God, or this gentleman
1479
02:05:17,770 --> 02:05:23,550
who used to hand out these
blasphemous pamphlets?
1480
02:05:24,911 --> 02:05:27,949
First he claimed,
God is missing
1481
02:05:28,648 --> 02:05:30,628
Then said, God is a fraud
1482
02:05:30,850 --> 02:05:34,627
Next he'll say,
God is dead
1483
02:05:36,022 --> 02:05:41,563
What do you want, son?
A world without God?
1484
02:05:43,730 --> 02:05:48,338
Do you have any clue
how people suffer?
1485
02:05:48,668 --> 02:05:50,944
No food to eat
1486
02:05:51,638 --> 02:05:53,640
No place to live
1487
02:05:54,541 --> 02:05:57,351
No friend to talk to
1488
02:05:57,810 --> 02:06:04,455
People kill themselves.
Slit their wrists, jump off buildings
1489
02:06:04,751 --> 02:06:08,756
"w?
Boolnolhqllvomlnpo
1490
02:06:09,322 --> 02:06:13,771
If bowing before God,
smearing holy ash,
1491
02:06:14,527 --> 02:06:19,340
wearing amulets,
gives them hope to live,
1492
02:06:19,532 --> 02:06:24,345
then who are you
to snatch away that hope?
1493
02:06:24,804 --> 02:06:32,916
And if you snatch away their God,
how will you fill that void?
1494
02:06:33,846 --> 02:06:37,885
This man rants about
'x/Vrong Numbers
1495
02:06:38,351 --> 02:06:44,029
Today he must tell us:
what is the Right Number?
1496
02:06:51,864 --> 02:06:54,936
You are right, Your Holiness
1497
02:06:55,702 --> 02:07:01,311
There was a time
I too had no food to eat
1498
02:07:01,941 --> 02:07:03,750
No place to live
1499
02:07:04,377 --> 02:07:09,451
becaulsgrliiil: friend
1500
02:07:10,817 --> 02:07:14,026
I had only one hope then -
1501
02:07:16,589 --> 02:07:18,432
God
1502
02:07:19,425 --> 02:07:22,565
Each day I hoped:
tomorrow will be better
1503
02:07:22,862 --> 02:07:25,672
God will find a solution
1504
02:07:27,467 --> 02:07:34,077
If“
1505
02:07:35,508 --> 02:07:39,650
the strength to face ordeals
1506
02:07:40,780 --> 02:07:43,351
But I have one question
1507
02:07:46,352 --> 02:07:49,299
Which God shall I believe in?
1508
02:07:50,290 --> 02:07:53,533
You say there is ONE God
1509
02:07:54,460 --> 02:07:56,440
'Wm
1510
02:07:57,430 --> 02:07:58,909
There are T\NO Gods
1511
02:08:00,466 --> 02:08:02,605
One who created us
1512
02:08:04,370 --> 02:08:08,011
And the other
whom you created
1513
02:08:08,941 --> 02:08:12,354
We know nothing about
the God who made us
1514
02:08:12,712 --> 02:08:17,491
BdllnGodYGlnlbw,
blfllnyou
1515
02:08:17,784 --> 02:08:22,392
Pally.
fihllnqniokpmnhoo
1516
02:08:22,488 --> 02:08:26,527
Readily meets the rich,
keeps the poor waiting
1517
02:08:26,859 --> 02:08:30,329
Thrives on flatten].
Makes you live in fear
1518
02:08:32,365 --> 02:08:34,606
My Right Number is simple
1519
02:08:36,035 --> 02:08:40,745
The God who created us all,
believe in Him
1520
02:08:42,308 --> 02:08:45,619
The God YOU created -
1521
02:08:46,546 --> 02:08:48,753
abolish him
1522
02:08:49,015 --> 02:08:50,494
Yes!
1523
02:08:50,883 --> 02:08:54,888
You'll abolish my God
and I'll keep quiet?
1524
02:08:55,355 --> 02:08:59,394
I know how to
protect my God
1525
02:08:59,559 --> 02:09:01,470
You will protect God?
1526
02:09:02,028 --> 02:09:03,939
You!
1527
02:09:04,330 --> 02:09:05,900
This is a puny planet
1528
02:09:06,632 --> 02:09:09,545
Billions of bigger planets
float in space
1529
02:09:09,736 --> 02:09:14,583
And you, sitting in a tiny corner of this
puny planet, have the nerve to say
1530
02:09:14,774 --> 02:09:18,483
you will protect Him,
who created the Universe?
1531
02:09:19,545 --> 02:09:24,324
He doesn't need your protection.
He can protect Himself
1532
02:09:27,787 --> 02:09:33,362
Today someone tried to
protect God and my friend died
1533
02:09:34,327 --> 02:09:36,967
fllolanllhloldl-
lhlhoo
1534
02:09:37,663 --> 02:09:39,939
Stop protecting God
1535
02:09:40,500 --> 02:09:43,879
Or this planet will have
no humans, only shoes
1536
02:09:44,303 --> 02:09:46,613
A Muslim terrorist
blows up a train
1537
02:09:47,507 --> 02:09:52,889
and a Hindu guru endures
your sermon. That's nice
1538
02:09:53,279 --> 02:09:58,058
What's this Hindu, Muslim?
Show me the label
1539
02:09:59,318 --> 02:10:01,992
-. d
1540
02:10:02,755 --> 02:10:08,728
This is the deadliest
'x/Vrong Number of this planet
1541
02:10:08,928 --> 02:10:11,670
It kills people,
separates them
1542
02:10:12,031 --> 02:10:16,980
Like your Wrong Number
separated Jaggu from Sarfaraz
1543
02:10:17,303 --> 02:10:23,310
- What Wrong Number?
- That Sarfaraz will betray
1544
02:10:23,543 --> 02:10:25,989
He did betray her
1545
02:10:26,312 --> 02:10:30,624
mun-wagon?
4m:
1546
02:10:32,618 --> 02:10:39,832
You say my prediction
about Sarfaraz was wrong?
1547
02:10:40,026 --> 02:10:41,266
Exactly!
1548
02:10:41,327 --> 02:10:45,469
Fllllnplwol-
IIWOIIUIIIIHIPIVIIIU
1549
02:10:45,598 --> 02:10:50,013
fa" at adrnit
1550
02:10:50,369 --> 02:10:54,317
that you are a liar.
You tried to defame me
1551
02:10:54,907 --> 02:10:56,978
What if I prove it?
1552
02:10:57,376 --> 02:10:59,014
Tipsy. . . don't!
1553
02:11:04,984 --> 02:11:06,725
Then this is yours
1554
02:11:12,758 --> 02:11:14,362
would
1555
02:11:14,794 --> 02:11:19,573
turf-akin!
1556
02:11:25,738 --> 02:11:32,451
I hope you will answer
my questions truthfully
1557
02:11:34,847 --> 02:11:39,921
In Belgium you fell in love
with a Pakistani boy
1558
02:11:41,387 --> 02:11:42,593
True or false?
1559
02:11:42,889 --> 02:11:45,301
Please spare my personal life
1560
02:11:45,424 --> 02:11:53,900
On Friday, at 3:21 pm
I predicted this boy will betray you
1561
02:11:54,367 --> 02:11:58,713
The next day you went to the
Marriage Registrar's office
1562
02:11:59,272 --> 02:12:00,945
but he didn't show up
1563
02:12:01,541 --> 02:12:03,919
True or false?
1564
02:12:04,010 --> 02:12:07,389
Yes, he didn't come.
Please stop this
1565
02:12:08,781 --> 02:12:14,925
Now will you come to my feet
or do I walk my feet to you?
1566
02:12:15,354 --> 02:12:19,302
- Sarfaraz did not betray.
- Please let it go!
1567
02:12:19,358 --> 02:12:21,861
So- ""'n,¢'=n-I d“
1568
02:12:22,295 --> 02:12:23,569
Please!
1569
02:12:23,729 --> 02:12:27,370
Just once,
for my sake
1570
02:12:32,305 --> 02:12:35,343
I was at the Marriage
Registrar's office and
1571
02:12:35,641 --> 02:12:37,484
a letter was brought to me
1572
02:12:37,543 --> 02:12:39,784
Did Sarfaraz bring it?
1573
02:12:41,647 --> 02:12:45,789
No.
l-lolulllllluflnlkld
1574
02:12:45,985 --> 02:12:48,932
nanny-nu?
m»
1575
02:12:49,255 --> 02:12:52,930
How do you know
Sarfaraz sent it?
1576
02:12:55,995 --> 02:13:00,375
It could have been
for some other girl
1577
02:13:02,902 --> 02:13:07,578
There was another girl.
VVith a cat, right?
1578
02:13:09,542 --> 02:13:13,513
She gave you the cat
to hold for a while
1579
02:13:14,480 --> 02:13:18,292
The kiddxaxéjhfieginfflgvgcgfzflge letter-?
1580
02:13:18,417 --> 02:13:21,296
- Nol
dldyouhlowlin?
1581
02:13:21,687 --> 02:13:22,597
L\l0
1582
02:13:22,688 --> 02:13:26,431
Then how would he know
the letter was for you?
1583
02:13:27,627 --> 02:13:34,340
Maybe he was told to give
the letter to the girl with the cat
1584
02:13:36,469 --> 02:13:42,886
You read the letter,
but didn't call Sarfaraz
1585
02:13:43,476 --> 02:13:45,717
pawl?
1586
02:13:46,512 --> 02:13:53,657
Because this man planted
a 'x/Vrong Number - that Muslims betray
1587
02:13:53,986 --> 02:13:56,364
Sarfaraz didn't betray you
1588
02:13:56,489 --> 02:13:57,763
What's going on?
1589
02:13:58,357 --> 02:14:03,329
You expect us to believe
these cat and bull stories?
1590
02:14:03,362 --> 02:14:04,602
One minute
1591
02:14:04,964 --> 02:14:09,037
We'll get to the truth right now.
Call Sarfaraz
1592
02:14:09,368 --> 02:14:11,507
Hurry up!
1593
02:14:13,606 --> 02:14:17,053
This number does not exist
1594
02:14:17,910 --> 02:14:21,357
Any other number?
Friend, college, something?
1595
02:14:21,547 --> 02:14:24,619
- C'mon Jaggu!
- Belgium University
1596
02:14:29,055 --> 02:14:30,898
- Hello.
- Hello!
1597
02:14:30,956 --> 02:14:34,995
I actually need to get in touch with
one of your grad students
1598
02:14:35,361 --> 02:14:36,840
Sarfaraz Yousuf
1599
02:14:36,929 --> 02:14:39,375
Ohyodn.
l-loldlhPiinkyfl
1600
02:14:40,366 --> 02:14:41,743
Has he left a number?
1601
02:14:41,801 --> 02:14:44,475
Sorry, we are not authorized
to give out information
1602
02:14:44,704 --> 02:14:46,411
This is really important
1603
02:14:46,472 --> 02:14:49,385
E-mail us your request and
I can forward it to Student Affairs
1604
02:14:49,642 --> 02:14:51,019
Have a nice day dear
1605
02:14:51,343 --> 02:14:53,050
His Pakistan number?
1606
02:14:53,312 --> 02:14:56,384
- Thi-n E°JZIQZZ°CYZrHnQ
1607
02:14:57,316 --> 02:14:59,762
I work at the
Pakistan Embassy
1608
02:15:00,319 --> 02:15:02,890
w-
1609
02:15:03,589 --> 02:15:05,830
lfllgofllholiflilElllltq,
1610
02:15:05,891 --> 02:15:08,337
- Oollyfl.
- Plllonlh0lp0dln
1611
02:15:11,597 --> 02:15:13,508
Greetings.
Pakistan E mbassy
1612
02:15:14,033 --> 02:15:15,569
Hello
1613
02:15:17,069 --> 02:15:20,380
A student from Lahore
worked with you
1614
02:15:20,573 --> 02:15:24,419
- SIHI'&.
-BIUIKK“IT?
1615
02:15:27,012 --> 02:15:29,515
Hello... is your name Jaggu?
1616
02:15:29,949 --> 02:15:31,622
How do you know?
1617
02:15:31,984 --> 02:15:35,727
Tllluiualu':'n.-i°-"'h'
1618
02:15:35,855 --> 02:15:37,596
Farah, it's Jaggu calling
1619
02:15:37,656 --> 02:15:41,297
Mr Sayyed, hurry,
it's Jaggu's call from India
1620
02:15:41,527 --> 02:15:44,007
On the double everyone!
1621
02:15:46,766 --> 02:15:52,580
Sarfaraz Yousuf calls us
from Lahore, every day at 9 am
1622
02:15:53,506 --> 02:15:57,579
And with impeccable politeness
asks just one question:
1623
02:15:57,910 --> 02:16:02,723
Was there a call for me
from India - from Jaggu?
1624
02:16:02,948 --> 02:16:05,986
We say “No“,
and he disconnects
1625
02:16:06,385 --> 02:16:08,331
He's driven us crazy
1626
02:16:08,521 --> 02:16:11,092
VB.
rloomadyouhlin
1627
02:16:26,505 --> 02:16:27,609
Hello...
1628
02:16:28,541 --> 02:16:31,750
- Mr Sarfaraz Yousuf?
- Yes, speaking
1629
02:16:32,044 --> 02:16:35,958
- VVhere are you?
- In Lahore. Vkfhy?
1630
02:16:36,448 --> 02:16:41,397
Arauunvwfilwfl
JAhmnNlfl?
1631
02:16:41,821 --> 02:16:45,598
Is there a chair or
a bench nearby?
1632
02:16:45,925 --> 02:16:50,305
Please sit down.
You're about to get a jolt
1633
02:16:51,497 --> 02:16:53,534
Pardon me?
1634
02:16:55,034 --> 02:16:57,412
You have a call from Delhi
1635
02:17:03,309 --> 02:17:05,846
Please speak here
1636
02:17:06,412 --> 02:17:08,653
Hello...
1637
02:17:09,548 --> 02:17:12,358
Sarfaraz...
1638
02:17:15,621 --> 02:17:17,362
JagQu~-
1639
02:17:19,358 --> 02:17:20,803
Hello...
1640
02:17:21,927 --> 02:17:25,067
...hello Jaggu,
what's the matter?
1641
02:17:26,932 --> 02:17:29,412
Had you come to the
Marriage Registrar's office?
1642
02:17:29,435 --> 02:17:33,349
“$10
1643
02:17:34,039 --> 02:17:35,882
Why didn't you call?
1644
02:17:36,108 --> 02:17:41,456
You'd 'Egouri-'tlitgzoizélct rne'
1645
02:17:42,381 --> 02:17:44,861
I knew you were
under family pressure
1646
02:17:44,984 --> 02:17:51,492
But deep down I knew,
one day you would contact me
1647
02:17:53,859 --> 02:17:57,363
What took you so long?
1648
02:17:58,297 --> 02:18:02,541
I sally.
lhnllyulrnvfinlqlhlllllll'
1649
02:18:09,808 --> 02:18:14,416
Just got the right number
from a friend
1650
02:18:39,872 --> 02:18:41,579
Thank you son
1651
02:19:16,475 --> 02:19:18,352
Here, hold this
1652
02:19:42,468 --> 02:19:45,779
Tipsy! You're taking
batteries home?
1653
02:19:45,971 --> 02:19:50,750
- Don't get them there.
- So many! For what?
1654
02:19:50,976 --> 02:19:54,924
Back home, I'll listen
to the sounds I've recorded
1655
02:19:55,314 --> 02:19:56,588
What sounds?
1656
02:19:56,849 --> 02:20:01,355
Earth sounds -
crows, traffic honking
1657
02:20:01,487 --> 02:20:03,797
Up there, you'll listen
to cars honking?
1658
02:20:04,023 --> 02:20:08,972
Now and then -
when I miss this planet
1659
02:20:11,397 --> 02:20:14,844
l-libfglai
1660
02:20:14,933 --> 02:20:16,503
Forget it, Tipsy!
1661
02:20:16,568 --> 02:20:20,380
You kidding?
It's stuffed with batteries
1662
02:20:20,539 --> 02:20:22,917
Wait!
1663
02:20:25,911 --> 02:20:29,358
Driver. . . please stop!
1664
02:20:42,861 --> 02:20:46,673
Everyone on your planet
has stick-out ears?
1665
02:20:47,866 --> 02:20:51,006
And they roam around naked?
1666
02:20:52,538 --> 02:20:55,542
Why are you staring?
Something on my face?
1667
02:20:59,678 --> 02:21:05,287
I was in tenth grade,
when I wrote my first poem,
1668
02:21:06,819 --> 02:21:08,662
KPH.
1669
02:21:09,721 --> 02:21:15,034
Tllvuvwlunlnnnnu.
laqpni...
1670
02:21:22,534 --> 02:21:26,380
ibtpulilifllalit
1671
02:21:28,841 --> 02:21:30,752
Pal, you're really cute
1672
02:21:32,544 --> 02:21:35,991
I-HUIIIX
i}?
1673
02:21:36,882 --> 02:21:40,762
l/Vho says"I/Vhafs in a name?"
1674
02:21:41,887 --> 02:21:45,960
No tape had sounds of
crows or traffic honking
1675
02:21:46,725 --> 02:21:49,865
Every tape had
just my voice
1676
02:21:57,569 --> 02:21:59,606
'Hamill-IQ'
1677
02:22:04,009 --> 02:22:05,716
Got it!
1678
02:22:11,016 --> 02:22:13,622
He sure made me run!
1679
02:22:16,822 --> 02:22:20,292
Tipsy, what's in these tapes?
1680
02:22:20,726 --> 02:22:23,832
_
1681
02:22:36,308 --> 02:22:40,586
Every night, when your planet
rises, I'll play these tapes
1682
02:22:41,813 --> 02:22:47,422
And fiil?heily°u'
1683
02:22:49,555 --> 02:22:53,469
Will you wave back...
now and then?
1684
02:22:55,460 --> 02:22:58,441
Haven't you recorded my voice?
1685
02:22:58,797 --> 02:23:01,368
Your voice?
1686
02:23:01,700 --> 02:23:05,876
Illiklllvo...
lllonopoulnyoulnchd
1687
02:23:06,972 --> 02:23:09,782
One poem? That's it?
1688
02:23:12,811 --> 02:23:15,417
I'm not exactly
in love with you...
1689
02:23:15,781 --> 02:23:18,819
"huiflnylino
ovuryoul
1690
02:23:37,736 --> 02:23:40,945
He didn't look back.
Not once
1691
02:23:41,340 --> 02:23:43,513
He was hiding his tears
1692
02:23:44,409 --> 02:23:49,381
One thing he learnt from us.
One thing he taught us
1693
02:23:49,748 --> 02:23:52,388
He learnt from us
how to fie...
1694
02:23:52,751 --> 02:23:56,927
. and taught ushow to love
1695
02:23:57,856 --> 02:24:00,860
lbillli
IIRIIP
1696
02:24:01,526 --> 02:24:06,839
He came here naked.
As children do
1697
02:24:07,966 --> 02:24:13,814
Asked a lot of questions.
As children do
1698
02:24:15,941 --> 02:24:19,047
And then one day...
1699
02:24:20,545 --> 02:24:23,651
...he went away
1700
02:24:24,483 --> 02:24:28,932
Four billion miles away
1701
02:24:30,355 --> 02:24:34,497
He left me two parting gifts
1702
02:24:36,361 --> 02:24:38,602
Sarfaraz
1703
02:24:39,398 --> 02:24:42,311
and Papa
1704
02:24:44,403 --> 02:24:51,582
Till I live... every night I'll look
at his planet and wave
1705
02:24:53,612 --> 02:24:58,459
I'm sure,
he'll do the same
1706
02:25:01,386 --> 02:25:04,424
I miss him
1707
02:25:43,028 --> 02:25:47,443
Fellow astronauts,
prepare to land on Earth
1708
02:25:47,499 --> 02:25:51,572
Remember the four
Earth Survival Commandments
1709
02:25:51,803 --> 02:25:54,682
(In:
Dolllmlnlnuulndnd
1710
02:25:54,973 --> 02:26:00,480
Cuddling, making love etc.
must be done in closed rooms
1711
02:26:00,612 --> 02:26:04,560
But fighting, making war etc.
Is allowed in the open
1712
02:26:04,850 --> 02:26:08,593
Two." Beware of language,
it's confusing
1713
02:26:08,653 --> 02:26:12,499
If Earthlings say,
'I love chicken and fish,'
1714
02:26:12,657 --> 02:26:16,332
it doesn't mean
they love animals,
1715
02:26:16,561 --> 02:26:20,907
but that animals are
on the lunch menu
1716
02:26:21,333 --> 02:26:25,975
The gap between thought and
speech is our topic of research
1717
02:26:26,605 --> 02:26:30,348
Three: On landing,
find dancing cars for clothes
1718
02:26:30,409 --> 02:26:37,588
Hide your remotes deep in your
underwear, safe from thieves
1719
02:26:37,816 --> 02:26:40,922
Four: the mother commandment
1720
02:26:40,986 --> 02:26:45,457
If anyone says."
I'M connect you to God,
1721
02:26:45,624 --> 02:26:50,004
dump the research, take a U-turn
and run for your fife
1722
02:27:02,574 --> 02:27:05,384
Come, don't be afraid
1723
02:27:10,515 --> 02:27:13,325
What are you goggling at?
1724
02:27:13,919 --> 02:27:16,729
Dllvonqndloln.
4M1?
1725
02:27:17,823 --> 02:27:22,602
On your last visit,
how often were you whacked?
1726
02:27:30,535 --> 02:27:33,345
- What's this?
- Self-defense!
1727
02:27:33,605 --> 02:27:35,710
Safety gadgets?
1728
02:27:35,941 --> 02:27:39,411
JIIW-
Jldlhunlnlfl“
1729
02:27:39,544 --> 02:27:40,614
Kaput!
1730
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
1731
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
L:ll:I
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
QDCDQD
1732
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
QDCDQD
1733
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
QDCDQD
1734
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
QDCDQD
1735
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
QDCDQD
1736
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
F?
1737
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:00,279
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
I:ll:I
ca
1738
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:03,280
OO
(Di
1738
00:00:04,305 --> 00:00:10,381
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