Original subtitles

ANNOUNCER: From the most trusted

journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source

for news.

This is The Daily Show with your host, Desi Lydic.

[theme music]

# #

[cheering]

Welcome to The Daily Show.

I'm Desi Lydic.

We've got so much to talk about tonight.

Trump has a playdate with China.

We found a new way to give robots CTE.

And could your next pilot be a furry?

One senator with nothing better to do investigates.

So let's get into the headlines.

[upbeat music]

# #

Let's kick things off with the midterm elections.

With voting just one month away,

Republicans are down in the polls,

but President Trump is ready to campaign and stump

for anyone who wants him.

They actually don't want the president

campaigning or stumping for them because he's too toxic.

REPORTER 1: Republican candidates

are running away from him like he's, quote, "kryptonite."

REPORTER 2: You're blanked if you mention him too much

and you're blanked if you don't stay in his good graces.

Quote,

REPORTER 3: "We've told them he cannot come."

You told the president he can't come?

What did he say?

I'm going to come.

But yes, Trump is about as popular as someone

without a COVID mask at a Massachusetts lesbian

bar, which means--

which means Republicans need to find a big issue that

will resonate with voters.

Who's got something?

No bad ideas.

Many airline pilots, flight attendants,

and air traffic controllers are part of the furry community.

Almost no bad ideas.

All right, fine, Senator Tuberville,

tell us more about this massive problem

of furries on airplanes.

It's terrifying when you think about this.

When you walk onto a commercial flight,

it's possible that the pilot flying your plane

could have a deranged fetish of dressing up like an animal.

You can't make this up.

I think you did just make this up.

Now, first of all, if you don't know what furries are, Mom and

Dad, we're talking about members

of a sexual subculture who dress up as cartoon animals.

It's like if everyone in that Chuck E. Cheese band

[bleep] each other.

Think of it like regular sex but with way more dry

cleaning afterwards.

But even if every pilot was a furry,

to use a technical aviation term,

who gives a flying [bleep]?

When my plane hits turbulence, I'm not like, oh my God.

I hope the pilot's never been pegged by the Fox

from Zootopia.

So I wouldn't exactly bet on that catching on.

But that's OK, because this week

Trump has a new opportunity to score

a major foreign policy win.

The leaders of the world's two biggest superpowers

meeting right now.

REPORTER 4: President Trump greeting

China's leader Xi Jinping at Joint Base Andrews.

The airport welcomed the first for a world leader, besides

the pope, since the 1960s.

Trump picked him up at the airport?

OK, that is friendship.

I don't even pick my own kid up at the airport.

But the other reason to meet Xi at the airport

was so that Trump could impress him

with a flyover of B-1 bombers.

Let's show China that America never

wavers and never flinches.

[bombers thundering]

Oh my God, that is so embarrassing.

Why did you wince like that?

You are the one who ordered the flyover.

It's like when a baby farts so loud that it scares itself.

Anyway, this was not a good omen

for negotiations with China.

There are major issues at stake here,

trade, AI, the war with Iran.

Now President Xi knows all he has to do to rattle Trump

is drop a book on the floor.

And obviously, this is a very important meeting.

So Trump was focused as usual.

Yeah, take that, hospital roofs,

where people get heart transplants, you dusty bitches.

Seriously, what is Trump talking about?

The most beautiful helipad ever?

I mean, what does that even mean?

How nice could a helipad be?

REPORTER 5: With the help of a new White House helipad,

President Trump is pulling out all the stops.

Oh my God, it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

It's like looking into heaven.

I wouldn't kick her off my South Lawn.

And who knows?

Maybe it impressed President Xi, too,

because he made a big announcement

at the first press conference.

INTERPRETER: I have a piece of good news.

In a few days, two pandas, Ping Ping and Fu Shuang,

will come to their new home in Zoo Atlanta

and meet with the American people.

Yes!

Hell, yeah!

We got pandas!

Yeah!

[audience cheering]

Sure, China is pushing us out of the Pacific,

seizing the global economy, reducing

us to a second-rate power.

But pandas, woo!

Although there was one small hitch

on the flight over when the pilot

asked the pandas to please report to the cockpit.

Dirty birdies.

Dirty birdies.

But it seems like this meeting was off to a good start, which

is going to disappoint one of Trump's biggest allies,

John Kennedy, Louisiana senator and grandma who

just wants one little kiss.

He views China as the head of a new axis of evil,

although he had a different way of saying it.

I think that the people running Iran are reptiles.

And they're part of a colony of reptiles, China, North Korea,

Russia, and as I said, Iran.

The chief reptile, the quarterback,

is President Xi and China.

Got it.

They're all reptiles.

But also, they play football?

Kind of a weird metaphor, but I think I got it.

All four of them are the same.

It's like the same hooker in different dresses.

I don't think I got it.

They're reptiles who play professional football,

but they're also hookers?

OK, stop mixing metaphors.

It's too much.

They all lie like timeshare salesmen.

Wait, now the reptile football hookers

are also timeshare salesmen?

This makes even less sense now.

Why do they have three jobs?

Most lizards only have one job.

What is happening?

Did you take donations from the metaphor lobby?

Just say what you mean.

I wouldn't turn my back on any of them,

even if I thought and knew they were two days dead.

Oh.

Oh, that's just great.

Now all the football hooker lizards are dead.

I mean, look at how sad their pimp is.

He wasn't like the others.

He took care of them.

They were like family.

Actually, side

do go into a death-like state called torpor,

where they lower their metabolic rates to save energy.

I'm talking about hookers, obviously.

For more on this historic moment,

we go live to the White House with Jordan Klepper.

[cheering]

Jordan, how is President Xi's visit going so far?

Well, the leader of China was greeted by an old man scared

of loud noises, then driven past a drained

reflecting pool into the half-demolished

ruins of the White House.

It's an utter humiliation for America,

so it's going exactly as planned.

And once again, President Trump is a genius.

Wait, so Trump is smart for making us seem shitty?

That's right, or as Senator Kennedy would say,

he's smarter than an alley cat outside a fish factory

who's also a hooker.

I'm sorry.

I'm lost.

Does a rooster crow when a Starbucks opens?

No?

It does if it's a hooker.

Point is, this is all part of President Trump's long game.

He's lulling China into a sense of overconfidence.

Xi is going to head back home saying, guys, America's cooked.

Shut down the killer AI.

See, Trump's fooling him better than six frogs in a trench coat

playing hooker games on a hooker corner with hookers.

I think you're overestimating Trump's intelligence here.

If he was smart, we wouldn't be losing a war with Iran

right now.

Desi.

Desi, Desi, you still don't get it.

It's the long game.

We're losing the war on purpose so that China thinks we

don't have any missiles left.

But we don't have any missiles left.

Exactly.

He's that good.

He's-- he's smoother than a clean-shaven jellyfish lubed

up with petroleum, eager to engage

in coitus for coinage, a.k.a.

a hooker.

Why are all these animals hookers?

Exactly.

The point is, all this chaos and

suffering Trump is imposing on the world

is just part of his grand plan to get Xi to let his guard down

before Trump makes his big move.

And what is that big move?

This all feels like a series of stupid short games

with no end in sight.

You want to know what the big move is?

- Yeah. - I'll tell you the big move.

When they least expect it, we ask China for two more pandas.

Boom!

Genius!

Genius!

Think about it!

Think about it!

Now we got four pandas.

And once they mate, we got infinite pandas.

Jordan, it's famously difficult

to get pandas to mate.

Oh, not these pandas.

They're hookers.

DESI LYDIC: Jordan Klepper, everybody.

When we come back, Grace Kuhlenschmidt will give

us the latest in tech news.

So don't go away.

[cheering]

Welcome back to The Daily Show.

Technology will one day kill us all.

But until then, it's pretty cool.

To find out more, we turn to Grace Kuhlenschmidt

in our ongoing segment Tech Yeah!

[upbeat music]

# #

What's up, AI doomers, AI boomers, and AI groomers?

Not in a gross way.

I'm just trimming my hair off the bottom of my Roomba.

Your girl's always shedding.

I'm Grace Kuhlenschmidt, and this is Tech Yeah!,

where I tell CPU all about the biggest stories in tech.

First up, everyone's heard about the new

$2,000 foldable iPhone.

This thing folds just like a wallet that

used to have $2,000 in it.

And it is awesome.

This is iPhone duo.

REPORTER 6: A whopping 7.6" screen.

There is no crease down the middle.

It's super thin.

REPORTER 7: As small as a passport.

REPORTER 8: You can make it into, like, a little tent mode.

It's great for doing video calls, watching movies.

REPORTER 9: Users can split the screen

into two apps or two windows for comparison shopping.

Hell, yeah.

Now I can compare the green thingy on Mush

to the pink thingy on Mush all on the same screen.

I used to have to open three separate laptops just

to do all my Mushing.

Not anymore.

My life has meaning again.

But one of the best features of the iPhone duo

is that it's totally creaseless, which is so crazy.

That's exactly what the doctors say about my brain.

But that's not all.

Apple also unveiled a new non-foldy iPhone,

and it comes with something you've never seen before.

JOHN TERNUS: And we're excited to introduce

burgundy, a sophisticated and unique new color.

What?

They made a burgundy phone.

This is so awesome.

I've never dropped something burgundy into the toilet,

except when I had all that beet salad at my uncle's funeral.

Moving on from your iPhone to the place where they make it--

China, where robots are becoming the next Simone Biles

and, if we're lucky, Tonya Harding.

REPORTER: Here at the World Humanoid Robot Games,

robot athletes are being tested like never before.

REPORTER: It's machine versus machine, humanoid robots

competing for glory, running faster

than Usain Bolt over 100 hundred meters

and jumping higher and further than any Olympian.

Let's go!

Robots competing in the Olympics.

This is the inclusivity that Jesse Owens fought for.

[laughter]

Take that, Robo Hitler.

And did you see that little guy tearing down the track?

[laughter]

That's exactly how I run when I found out-- find out

there's a new purple thingy on Mush.

[laughter]

Can you believe we're were alive to see

robots training to become the soldiers of tomorrow?

This is probably how the pilgrims felt when

they first saw the dinosaurs.

[laughter]

But as inspiring as these e-Olympians are,

let's not forget that their bodies are still on the line.

REPORTER: Some have collapsed, burst into flames,

plowed into safety barriers, and

been stretchered off the track by their human minders,

thoroughly entertaining the crowd.

[bleep]

[laughter]

This is so sad.

This is probably how the pilgrims felt when they first

saw the dinosaurs explode.

[laughter]

My biggest question is, how the heck did I

not get invited to this thing?

I would've been a hit in the Olympic Village.

Let's just say these robo-lympians

are not the only ones whose groins

will be bursting into flames.

[laughter]

But did you know that some robots can do more than run

into walls and fall down?

Some can even comfort us.

It makes me wonder, what if you could

have a companion that would never leave,

never age, and never die?

REPORTER: What if you could have

a companion that would never leave,

never age, and never die?

Well, now you can.

The only catch-- it's a robot.

I don't think that's the only catch.

[laughter]

I think the other catch is that it's a huge pair

of titties with no legs.

[laughter]

Which is, of course, my ideal companion,

so I'm desperate to know more.

ANNOUNCER: It features soft, warm skin,

human-like facial expressions, and the AI-driven ability

to have and remember conversations.

Unlike most humanoids, which are designed for work or help

around the house, this robot has one purpose only-- to ease

the owner's loneliness.

Warm human skin, easing loneliness.

It's obvious what this robot is for--

stress-testing your tube tops.

Do I go with the cotton one or the polyester one?

I won't know until I titty-[bleep] this robot.

[laughter]

Well, that's all the time we have for Tech Yeah!

Tune in next time when I show you which VR goggles you should

wear while driving at night.

[laughter]

[cheers, applause]

Grace Kuhlenschmidt, everyone.

When we come back, Merritt Wever will be joining me

on the show, so don't go away.

[cheers, applause]

[cheers, applause]

Welcome back to The Daily Show.

My guest tonight is an Emmy Award-winning actor who stars

in the new film Primetime.

So you're playing a 13-year-old named Peter.

Peter.

And you have been chatting with this man online.

OK.

You can-- he likes cats, and he has a sweet tooth.

All you need to do is get him to the kitchen island.

And Chris will come in, and you will go out.

Jesus, what did you--

ANDIE: OK.

Puka shell, puka shell, puka shell.

No puka shell?

WOMAN: Now this is blocking me.

OK, Dan, do you understand?

Is there maybe time for a rehearsal?

We're gonna shoot the rehearsal.

CREW: All right, guys.

Please welcome Merritt Wever.

[upbeat music, cheering]

OK.

Aw.

You're so sweet.

Hi.

Oh, I'm OK.

# #

Hi.

Oh.

We are so, so happy to be here.

I'm a huge fan of your work.

Thank you so much for having me.

I'm so nervous that I have not one, but two safe words.

Yes, you do.

Yes.

Do you-- should we share what they are,

or should it be a surprise?

I think it should be a surprise.

I think yo-- if they come out, I

think that you'll understand what's happening, yes.

DESI LYDIC: Yeah, yeah.

Hopefully they don't come out. - I know.

It might be our secret for--

It might be our little secret that we'll keep forever.

You are a three-time Emmy winner.

Yeah.

[cheers, applause]

That's kind.

Three of many incredible performances of yours.

Anytime you turn up in something,

I know it's going to be an incredible project.

Nurse Jackie, Severance, Marriage Story--

You're very kind.

DESI LYDIC: --Godless.

I could go on.

And-- but this is your first time doing late night.

Yes.

This is so new to me.

I really-- I really squeaked by there for a while.

You did.

But it's not my first time in the building.

The reason I keep looking over there

is that I was an audience member, like, 20-- yes.

And I sat--

[cheers, applause]

You sat right up here.

I'm a New Yorker.

I grew up 30 blocks south, and I

got tickets right at the beginning

of Mr. Stewart's tenure.

And I sat right there.

I think you can see me looking at you.

And it was my first-- yes, totally.

And it was my first lesson in "don't tell

the truth in show business because it

can bring a vibe down."

Oh, no.

What truth -- did Jon interact with you?

Yes.

He came out, and he was-- you know, before the show starts,

like, there's, like, a, hey, good vibes.

Let's get rapport going.

And I don't remember how, but me and him started talking.

And he asked how I was doing, and I was like,

I mean, I don't know, I'm in college,

but I'm not sure if I chose the right one.

And I'm like, I don't know what to do

about-- like, I was honest.

First mistake.

Oh.

And, like, the room really came down.

[laughter]

I'm gonna be honest, he was a little off for the segment.

We went to commercial.

It was quiet, and he just said, I don't know.

I'm kind of bummed out.

I've been thinking about that college

girl who couldn't do voices.

And the lesson is, emotional honesty and show business,

not always, not always, not always.

DESI: This is-- I will say two things.

Yeah.

One, Jon just told someone through the studio

who just told me that he's very jealous that I

get to interview you right now, because he's

a big fan of yours. - 'Cause he doesn't remember--

So all is forgiven.

--that I'm that girl, that I cost him, like,

maybe two and a half laughs.

Yeah.

All is forgiven.

And I would argue, that is what makes you

the most incredible actor is your honesty,

so please don't ever change it.

It--

Do you do this for a living or something?

No, it is very true, and it's also

what I love about your first Emmy acceptance speech,

winning for Nurse Jackie.

It is, if you haven't seen it, it

is the greatest Emmy acceptance speech of all time,

and I think we have a clip. - Ah.

Can we play the clip?

Thanks so much.

Thank you so much.

Um, I gotta go.

Bye.

[laughter]

You know what happened there--

DESI: It's my favorite.

You know what I didn't have?

DESI: What?

I did not have banana minestrone.

DESI: Banana minestrone is her safe word.

Banana minestrone is the safe word.

That is the safe word.

But I'm very lucky that, like-- yeah, it's true.

That was an instance of me being quite emotionally honest.

and it was OK. It was OK.

DESI: It was perfect.

I really got lucky.

DESI: It was so perfect, and so you.

You got to work with the great Edie Falco on Nurse Jackie.

- I know. - What was she like?

Was she--

Love of my acting life.

- Right? - Yeah, I just feel like--

Was she a mentor to you?

Yeah, she was.

And I still-- I mean, I love her.

I still can't believe I got to learn from her for seven

seasons, and I don't--

I mean, I always knew how important she was to me,

but something happened last year where I really realized.

I was, you know on a set, and I was supposed to kinda

get to a place emotionally and I was like, ah,

I didn't really get there, and so you kind

of walk away kicking yourself.

And I texted her, and you know I

am very lucky that Edie Falco texts me right back.

You know, and she gave me, like,

the perfect comforting words.

You know, happens to "everyone."

[laughter]

DESI: Happens to all guys. - Exactly.

DESI: That's what she said to everybody.

I was like-- yeah, I know, comforting.

Yeah, have heard them, have said them.

And I was like, you know, hobnobbing with the actor and

the director afterwards and I was like, yeah, you know,

just didn't get there.

What are you gonna do?

You win some, you lose some.

And the actor was--

I said, but I'm OK, because I texted Edie.

And he said, why did you text Edie?

And the director, unprompted, goes, because she's

Edie [bleep] Falco. And--

[laughter]

'Cause she's Edie [bleep] Falco, and she's my acting mom.

Oh, that's so lovely.

That's what she is to me.

And now you get to pass on that wisdom

to other young actors who you get to work with.

I know.

It's kinda nice about getting older in this business.

Yeah.

Like, she taught me-- no, it's true.

Like, she taught me how to-- how to shepherd someone

and how to protect them, even if they don't know

that that's what you're doing.

DESI: Right, right.

Yeah.

I have to talk about this movie, Primetime.

It's about Chris Hansen and his show, To Catch a Predator.

Yes.

So I guess my first question to you

is, Merritt, what did you think was gonna happen tonight?

I know.

I know.

How old did you think I was?

So creepy.

I don't like being on the other side of that question.

It's so cre--

It is.

It's super creepy, and Pattinson does a great job.

Yes, he does.

A great job with that voice.

Yeah, bang on.

The performances are incredible.

Yeah.

It's a deeply haunting movie.

It-- it explores not just the predator, the actual suspect

being caught, but kind of the predatory behavior

behind the scenes.

It's true.

Chris, the Chris Hansen character.

You play a producer who has some moral complexity.

Certa-- yeah, certainly moral complexity.

To say the least?

Yeah, I think it's a group of people

who think that they are hunting the monsters,

and I think they find by the end of the film

that, like, the monsters within themselves are also revealed.

DESI: Yes.

Yes.

DESI: Did you-- so you play, essentially,

the showrunner of the sho-- - Yes.

DESI: The main producer--

Yeah.

DESI: --who's kind of this unsung

hero of the whole production.

At times, your character feels invisible and

you're kind of waiting--

Usurped, taken for granted.

Yes. DESI: Yeah.

Yeah, and she's the whole reason

that it's able to carry on.

Yeah.

DESI: What was it-- how do you prepare for a role like that?

Do you-- did you actually do research and kind

of shadow other producers?

Did you interview people?

I did a lot of different kinds of research,

but the thing that I found most helpful,

besides just working with the material,

was speaking to two longtime TV news producers who were

working-- the show takes place, or the film takes place,

20 years ago, and they were working at a very high level

back then, and continue to do so now, and they--

they kind of talked to me about the weird work/life merging

that happens when-- when you're responsible for getting a show

made, making sure the trains run on time,

but also, host finagling, which in this moment, I am--

[laughter]

I am sure no one has ever had to finagle a lady like this.

Oh, no. MERRITT: Yeah.

Ask around. MERRITT: But--

Ask around.

But tougher hosts, tougher hosts

might need a shoulder to cry on.

They may need a mother, a therapist,

a girlfriend, a mommy, a pharmacist, whatever.

DESI: Yeah.

You know what I mean?

And so, in addition to, like, getting a show made,

her job is to manipulate the on-screen talent.

DESI: Right.

Yeah.

DESI: And it also kind of forces the viewer to--

like, I very much remember that show being on the air.

MERRITT: Yeah.

It was so much a part of our culture.

And it makes you ask yourself, like, even

as an audience member watching that show, was that predatory?

Were we participating in that kind of--

I know, I know.

Everyone asks me-- first of all,

like, I'm old enough that-- that I saw it when it was first

on the air, and I'm old enough to not realize

that I was making a period piece.

Like, I thought it just took place "ago."

Right.

I didn't know that it took place, like, in another time.

Yes!

But, yeah, I watched that show when it was on the air,

and it's true.

Like, I wonder if younger people who

don't know that that show exists

are going to hear about it and think that it is shocking

and kind of like, oh, my God.

How could that exist?

Or if they've become so used to seeing anything and

everything online that, to them, well, of course,

you can have a hidden camera show

where you have people come looking

for-- looking to prey on children,

and you have a gotcha moment.

Right.

I don't know if it'll feel tame,

almost, to today's audience.

It was at a different time, before everyone

had phones in their pockets, and cameras and--

Before there was-- yeah, cameras and the internet

in your pocket and--

yeah, I mean, I think part of-- but it's true.

Like, I watched the show.

And now I look back, and I'm like, oh, God.

What was I a part of?

Why did I think that was OK?

What was I looking for?

Because it--

You know, I watched it.

The movie, in part, is about what

happens when news, entertainment, and

law enforcement get in the same room,

and the wrong entity starts to call the shots.

The wrong head of the dragon starts to take over.

Yeah.

And what do you think, at that time,

20 years ago, got people interest-- so interested?

Was it the salacious nature of the crime happening?

Was it the justice that was being served?

Was it--

You mean wh--

I'm sure that the show likely sold

itself on the idea of justice.

DESI: Mm-hmm.

I can't imagine that was the prime concern.

DESI: Mm-hmm.

I'm scared Chris Hansen is gonna come after me.

[laughter]

I don't think he watches this show.

OK, wrong network.

But if we see him lurking around the building--

OK.

You know, banana minestrone.

Banana minestrone.

Banana minestrone.

[laughter]

Well-- oh, I think it also brings up an interesting

idea of, like en--

the idea of entertainment versus justice,

and this particular moment in time.

Why do you think that this film is so resonant right now?

Um, I think that's a very fair question,

but I think it's kind of a question

that, more than anything else I've ever been a part of,

I need other people to answer.

Like, I'm still too inside it, and the writer/director is

also-- he has a documentary film background,

so there was a lot of--

there was a lot of, like, mobility

is the wrong word, on set.

There were a lot of shifts and changes,

and I think I'm still learning what the film is.

And talking to other people is kind

of like having-- the audience ends up holding a mirror

and telling you what it is that you just made.

And more than anything else I've

been a part of, that's the way I feel on this one.

I need other people to tell us what we made,

which is not so unrelated to that show.

DESI: Right. - You know?

DESI: Right. I do--

Yeah.

DESI: When I left the movie, I thought,

I have to go back and watch that again,

because there's so much to process.

There is.

And it's such a visua-- it's a visceral experience.

MERRITT: It's a feast. Yes, yeah.

It's very voyeuristic.

It's kind of-- it kinda you want to go jump in the

shower afterwards.

Yeah, I agree, I agree.

Clean yourself off.

- I know, full throttle icky. - Yeah.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Yeah. I know.

- But for-- - Go see it.

Go see it. - Yeah, go see it.

Are we selling it? - It's a romp.

- It's captivating. - You, especially.

[laughter]

Your performance is incredible in it.

Robert Pattinson's performance is incredible.

Yes. DESI: Phoebe Bridgers is in it.

I know, I know.

I got to, like, you know, on the down--

- Were you a fan? - I'm so old.

- Yes! - Yeah.

Yes.

Right?

I know, and I got to, like, hang out with her for a couple

of weeks, 'cause she had to be there,

'cause she was being paid.

DESI: Yes.

She couldn't leave the room.

I know. DESI: She's great in it.

She's a great actor. - She's so good.

- Yeah. - I know.

She is so, so good.

And I also liked that she seemed to confirm, you know.

She was like, yeah, I--

I was comparing what my job, the traveling circus of a set,

of a film set in particular, the like,

band of merry pranksters who go from town to town

and have this kind of little informal family

that makes something together.

Yeah, I was comparing that to what

she does as a musician when she tours,

and she was like, well, when I'm on tour,

I'm playing, like, the same album over and over.

And the place is new, but I'm going with my band.

Right.

So, like, I'm traveling with my people.

And every time you go to work, it's

a whole new band of merry pranksters,

and you're doing different material every day.

And it felt good to have Phoebe Bridgers be like,

your job is hard.

DESI: Yes!

It is.

And you make it look so easy.

How-- what do you enjoy most?

Do you like being able to go onto a film set

and put everything into this role and this story,

and then walk away and move on to something entirely new?

Or do you like having a TV show where

you can play a character for an extended period of time?

I think that--

I'm sure I'm not the first actor you've heard say, like,

I like to do-- the next thing that I do is always,

you hope, different than the thing you just did.

It's like you need to let a certain muscle rest for a while

and build up a new one, but it's

been a long time since I've been a part of series

television in a legitimate, committed way,

and I've started to kind of miss

what it's like to be written for

and what it's like to spend time in a character's shoes

and really get a sense of ownership

and a sense of knowing who that person is.

Being written for is a wonderful thing, and so when--

when series television--

yeah, when series television is going well, it's a gift.

It's like every script is a gift for you, and I miss that.

DESI: Oh.

- A gift from writers. - Yes.

- Yeah. - It truly is.

Yeah, I know. Yeah.

Do you hear that, writers?

[applause]

Is there-- is there anything that you're dying to do next?

Any particular role that you would love to play,

or genre that you want to dip your toe into?

The boring answer is Shakespeare.

DESI: Really?

Yeah, weirdly.

DESI: Oh.

But also, I miss comedy, especially after this.

I miss comedy.

DESI: Oh, come back to comedy.

I miss comedy. I know.

It's not up to me.

DESI: I would love to watch you in a comedy.

That's very nice. Your ears to--

Well, you've said it, so now it's gonna happen.

OK.

You put it out into the universe.

OK.

You will have 10,000 offers after this.

[applause]

Well, in the words of a great actress I know, thanks so much.

I gotta go. Bye.

Bye. Thank you.

It was beautiful to have you on.

- Thanks. - I adore you.

Congratulations.

The longest eight to 10 minutes ever.

Primetime,it is in theaters nationwide September 25.

Merritt Wever!

We're gonna take a quick break, but we'll

be right back after this.

OK!

[applause]

[upbeat music]

# #

That' our show for tonight.

Now here it is, your Moment of Zen.

This is the North Lawn, right on Pebble Beach.

Pebble Beach.

Those who have worked there, those who have taken a tour,

you know what I'm talking about.

Can we take that side shot to our team in the control room

again and look down?

We've never shown you this shot.

That is what we refer to as Pebble Beach.

You are one of the three of us on Pebble Beach.

Yes, I'm on Pebble Beach.

--Pebble Beach because of the stones

that are beneath our feet.

MAN: Oop.

Sorry.