Original subtitles

Sweet invitation of feminine beauty whence come the

Sitting up late does not seem to destroy them. What would you say if you

only could speak?

Life is not short from the day you are carried homeward in triumph away

from the store.

Baby will soon want to know what you're made of and scatter your...

I never spoke to Lily Farris again after the incident in Lily's bedroom.

Or to her pianist and accomplice Otto Mergen.

Not that my snubbing them had the slightest effect.

Like all egotists, they were completely indifferent to what anybody else thought

of them.

Except, of course, that in their case they were obliged to be aware of the

sensibilities of their audiences.

But how were audiences to know that the English rose captivating them twice

nightly with her wide eyes and childish songs?

was depraved, that she actually preyed on innocent young girls to satisfy her

and Mergan's obscene appetites.

Audiences adored her, and the hideously waxen Mergan, which says a lot about the

illusory nature of the theatre.

But whatever false image they maintained on stage, the presence of Lily and

Mergan was a polluting force, nudging us inexorably nearer to the edge of the

pit.

Then some young rascal will pull you to pieces. Stop behaving yourself. You're a

giant, bloody old thing.

I'll take that off myself.

Take your mind off that. Not in love with any man. Not in love with me. She

said so. Not in love with me. Leave me alone.

Every day.

She thinks you're stupid. Stupid.

Come on, don't leave your stupid little son.

Leave him alone. Not in love with me. She said so.

and you can be aired on stage.

Tell Mr. Reynolds I want a different dressing room. I want a dressing room of

my own. I won't be threatened. I'll fetch the police.

Tell Mr. Reynolds it'll be all right now.

Thank goodness.

Join us over the road at the King's Head.

I think we deserve a pint, Richard.

Yeah, thanks. I'll see you over there.

Do you think we should all tell Mr. Rollinson about him? That won't be

necessary. He's got eyes.

And a temper.

When you see me swinging on our garden door You can holler down our rainbow You

can climb our apple tree I don't want to play in your yard If you won't be good

to me

Which one are you?

What are you talking about?

Three of you here, innit?

Ollerton, Mapes and Hernecastle.

I'm Hernecastle.

The other two are still in bed?

Caught at last, are we?

Superintendent here wants to see you at 10 o'clock sharp on the stage of the

palace. Shall I go up and tell the other two, or do you?

I'll go.

Mr. Ollerton won't pray for the police unless I give him some reason.

There's been a body found.

You'll all be told.

A body found?

We'll all be told about it by the big chief, I suppose.

Where's Sissy?

She's probably sitting on the WC, having a good cry.

She's sentimental and constipated, so she spends a lot of time there.

I wish you'd told that Bobby to come up here. I'd have got more out of him.

A body found.

That isn't enough.

If they're calling everyone on the bill to assemble on stage, that must mean the

body was found in the palace.

I'd already worked that out for myself, thank you, Sherlock Holmes.

It might possibly be one of the company.

Well, they're stagehands down there. They've been dead for years, and

nobody's noticed.

Right. I'll bring Sissy.

The body that had been found belonged to Noni Colmar, the young French acrobat.

Somebody had strangled her.

You!

This is the second time I've had these Colmars going around with me.

That girl looked a ripe little piece in her stage costume, and she was very fond

of pushing out her tits and wagging her ass at any man.

Ask that lad. Richard?

My impression, no.

It's only a guess.

She didn't get much chance outside to be with men.

Her uncle and the other two wouldn't let her, so she made the most of her chances

backstage to amuse herself.

She was a bit of a teaser, if you know what I mean.

And she teased somebody once too often.

So we needn't waste too much time with the stage staff.

I wouldn't have anything to tease.

Right. Thank you very much, gentlemen.

I'm going to see the manager.

Unless he can find a good fill-in fast, we'll all have to spread our acts

tonight and that'll take rehearsal.

Go and wait with Sissy.

I'll give her a drink round the corner.

She probably needs one.

Or you do.

Go on with you.

Can I just have some of this?

Just tell me anything at all. Look, it only happened last night. For God's

sake, leave us alone, will you?

I don't understand you, Richard.

You're a nice boy, sensitive, artistic and all that.

You should be feeling how horrible this all is.

Why aren't you?

I am, really.

It's not so bloody strange and unnatural with people like those reporters around.

Nick would never let on that anything could upset him, ever.

Whatever happens, he's always seen something 10 times worse in Berlin or

somewhere.

Now, Sissy. It's all right for you men.

Nobody tried to strangle you.

If they don't catch you, did it?

It might be my turn next week. Stop it.

You don't know what it's like being a girl.

You feel so helpless.

You can think you're alone with a nice man.

Suddenly, you see a look in his eye. Makes your blood run cold.

Now we know we're going around with a murderer.

Until they catch him.

I'm not going to trust any man on a billion inch. Not one inch. If any of

them stops me in a dark alley, I'll scream the place down.

I need a drink.

What was the matter, Nick?

Not another horrible murder?

Something much worse.

Worse?

What?

The manager's already booked her fill in an Irish tenor from Manchester.

Nick, you are hard.

We'll be packed out tonight, you'll see.

As soon as the English go to music halls, they love the Irish.

I'll have a large scotch.

is the dear fingers so torn one for me

What's the matter?

I'm so frightened, Richard, dear.

And he doesn't care.

Let me stay a bit, please.

I just want you to hold me.

Just tell me it's all right.

I haven't come for that.

I'm too frightened.

I know what it's like. A man holding a girl.

If I want it, I don't care.

Just as long as she comes with me.

Sissy, this is a bad idea.

It won't work.

I'll be sorry in the morning.

I don't care about the morning.

I'm sorry, but I don't want you here.

For your own sake as well as mine.

Richard, please.

Can't you understand?

He understands, all right.

He understands very well.

Get out.

Out!

She thought I was asleep.

Don't be too hard on her, Uncle. She really is scared out of her wits.

She never had any.

And if she's so scared, she'll be glad she's going.

She finishes on Saturday.

No argument.

I desperately didn't want Sissy to leave the company.

She was a real friend.

Genuine and warm-hearted, not somebody sinister or murderous. Uncle Nick.

Don't make a final decision for 24 hours.

I made up my mind some time ago. She's too fat.

She's slowing down the box and pedestal effect.

But don't you think if she's going, Richard, at the end of next week, I'll

get in someone who used to work for me.

Morning, gentlemen.

Just a couple of questions before you get too busy.

I'm busy now.

What's the matter with him?

He's sacked Miss Mapes.

Oh, dear.

And where is Miss Mapes at this moment?

Still having a misery in bed.

So if you had to guess, who would it be?

Heavens, I don't know.

Mr Mergan and Miss Ferris.

Would you say they were popular members of your company?

No, I wouldn't.

Well, some have mentioned the dwarf, Barney.

I'm sorry, did you say something?

No.

He did fool around with her now and again. He's a silly little man.

He went off early with Sam and Ben Hayes.

That's right.

So he did.

Any others?

Duffield, perhaps.

One of the three Americans.

That's sheer prejudice.

What I've been wondering, Inspector, is how you're going to continue your

inquiries.

Move to Preston on Sunday.

Blackpool the following week.

Oh, we know that, young man.

That's the chief reason we're calling in the yard.

I can't say I'm sorry.

Ten to one, you'll get Inspector Crab.

Now, he's a terror.

Doesn't look like a crab, but behaves like one.

Moves sideways.

Then, all of a sudden, it's a pinch.

Darling Richard, I'm sorry to have gone without saying goodbye to you and giving

you a last kiss, but I can't stand it anymore and I've got to go now.

Oh, there's nowhere to go but back home.

You're such a nice, dear boy.

And I don't mind your being standoffish with me because I knew all the time you

were really in love with Nancy Ellis, even though she's obviously not in love

with you.

Well... She can't be, can she?

Don't forget me.

Because I am a true friend.

And perhaps a bit more.

Love, Sissy.

She gets her money, an extra week too, and off she goes, deliberately leaving

us in the cart for tomorrow.

That's a woman for you, lad. You can't trust her in my bloody yard.

She knew damn well I'd arranged for Doris Tingley to join us at Bristol on

Sunday and had no hope of getting her here before, so off she goes without a

word. Female spite!

No loyalty! Uncle!

Well, we'll have to get hold of Sam and Ben and Barney.

We'll put a lot of old material back in and do without her.

I tried to shake myself free of the pervading, enervating gloom by inventing

a new trick, the magic painting.

As for Uncle Nick, he was morose and silent.

The truth was, though, he'd never have admitted it, even under torture.

He was feeling lost without Sissy.

He'd neglected her and treated her badly at times.

But he missed her ego-flattering, intensely feminine companionship.

He was not to find similar qualities in Sissy's replacement.

Doris Tingley was the angriest person I've ever known.

She was permanently angry.

What about the box? What about it? I've already told you, I didn't have a money

of a bailiff. Yes, I know, but that is dangerous. I mean, I could have been

hurt, and they don't seem to know what they're doing.

I mean, my God, this act's gone to the dogs since I was last around.

Doris, I don't think you... Oh, you two and Nick Arlington, you haven't

improved. Come on, now.

Let's start from the top.

Listen, you, could you possibly get that tempo right?

Come on, let's start.

Come on.

Where are you going?

Mrs. Tingley, would you like to come for a drink? Who's paying?

I'll pay, Mrs. Tingley. Oh, don't call me that. It sounds so damn silly.

You're a, what's it, Richard, Dick, and I'm Doris. You can call me Doris.

That doesn't mean to say I'm going to spend any money on you and these

ridiculous pro bars.

Signed photos of great artists? I don't think.

All powers of the landlord? I also don't think.

You can buy me just one scotch and splat, and don't imagine I'm joining in

any rags. I'm here to save you.

I don't

like

smut

all this about a murder? I asked Nick, but he didn't seem to want to talk about

it. Did it himself, perhaps?

Come on, tell me.

Surely you've read about it? I have, indeed.

Nonny Colmar wasn't your call.

What else?

Well, the police have called in Scotland Yard, and we're all to be interviewed

again by an Inspector Crabbe.

You can't drag me into it. I haven't worked for Nick Ollerton for three

years, and only left to marry Archie Tingley, more for me.

If the man who did it... It's one of those sex maniacs I saw at the band

call. I'm not surprised.

Just let them try any funny business with me, that's all. Just let them try

laying a finger on me, that's all.

One night when a certain comedian tried some hanky-panky, I kicked him right in

his best joke. Well, he hasn't forgotten that. I'll be bound.

I'll tell you what variety's full of, mostly.

Riff-raff. Just downright common riff-raff, earning ten times as much

money as they're worth.

Some of them.

I agree.

Right. Come on, then.

Didn't you miss the variety stage?

Miss it? Not a bit of it. Put me married to Archer Tingley's in that variety

stage for me. He's in and out of more jobs than any other man in England.

When people ask me what he's doing, I have to think. Even then, I'm sometimes

two jobs behind.

He can get almost any job he wants.

But as soon as he started, either he can't keep it or he doesn't like it. And

what do I say?

Nothing. Well, hardly anything.

He twists me all the time around his little finger.

I wish to God I'd married a steady man I didn't much like.

What job is he doing at the moment, Doris? Oh, for heaven's sake, Richard,

have a bit of wit. I've just told you that's the kind of question I hate.

He's selling some Turkish tobacco or electrical fittings or bicycles.

He can't even ride one.

Sure, he'll tell us himself when he gets here tomorrow.

I don't know about you.

But I'm off.

Archie's here.

If he's nothing better to do, you might as well come and have a look at him.

Mr. Hernecastle, what a delight for me, my dear fellow. How do you do? Your

uncle doesn't care for me, you know. I suppose because I stole Doris away from

him. That helped, but he wouldn't like you anyhow. I don't know why anyone

does. I'm sure you and I will get along famously. Will you have a drink with us?

No, you're not starting that.

Doris, please remember, I've come over 200 miles to... Yeah, to see a man about

a job. You told me so.

I came to see you, my dear. I've been missing you terribly.

And now when I suggest a friendly drink... All right, but just one.

Right, I'll call a taxi.

Did he say a taxi?

I can't imagine how I put up with him.

Not that he's not better than most of you. I mean, he does try to please.

Not like most men who would think they're doing you a favour just by

yawning or blowing smoke in your face.

And it's not Turkish tobacco or bicycles, but boats now.

Boats, I ask you. What sort?

Oh, little boats for Park Lakes.

And I doubt if he's ever been in one in all of his life.

He gets talking to this fella in an expensive saloon bar and within half an

hour he's bought 50 boats with money he hasn't got.

I mean, one time I just stopped him from buying 7,000 roller skates.

I don't care for him. I don't care for him at all.

I'm stuck with him, aren't I?

Richard there are one or two things you should know about me.

My interests are far and wide.

But not deep. Oh, you can bet your boots on that.

I try this and the other. Why?

For two good reasons.

First, I'm accumulating experience, giving me, well, an insight.

Oh, into what?

Secondly, I'm waiting for the proper moment to enter the moving picture

business. Not at the producing end. Oh, no.

But at the distributing, exhibiting end.

to be in a position to feed the demand for moving pictures, which is about to

grow and grow.

Richard, I assure you, nothing can stop them.

Doris doesn't understand the position because, in some respects, she's hyper.

His husband's bound, you mean.

My dear, I'm talking to Richard not only because I like him, but to be perfectly

frank, because I hope he'll pass some of this on to his Uncle Nicolagin, who

might just be wondering what to do with his money.

It's absolutely inevitable.

What is?

Moving pictures will go up and up.

Variety. Down and down.

Oh, nonsense.

The end of an era.

You mock my words.

Oh, oh, she listens.

Charlie Pierce is rehearsing a new musical comedy.

The girl in the band.

One of our dear old pals. Oh, we must get to see it.

Opening shortly at the region. Tom Bowen, Gertie Mae, Nancy Ellis, Charles

Pierce. Did you say Nancy Ellis?

Know her?

Of course he knows her. Just look at him.

Aha!

Stop it, Archie. You sound like a billy goat.

Well, Richard?

She and her sister were touring with us until they went into pantomime at

Plymouth.

I've been wondering what happened to her.

And has she been wandering too?

I don't know.

Well, if she hasn't, she ought to have. I bet you're worth ten of her.

Ladies and gentlemen, hurry round now. Bring the children there.

In ten years time Doris will be riding behind a chauffeur in a big bar. Oh you

daft idiot I'll probably be running a lodging house and you'll be doing the

washing up and cleaning the shoes The only moving pictures you'll be able to

afford is what the butler saw on the pier promenade.

Naughty! Aren't she?

Dear Nancy I've just heard that you are rehearsing at the Regent

So this ought to reach you quite soon.

If you've ever sent any replies to my letters, I've never had them.

I shan't write again after this.

But it wouldn't hurt to send me a line.

Even a postcard.

To tell me you are not interested.

And perhaps I could stop thinking about you.

For the next three weeks, I shall be at the Palace Blackpool.

Yours, very sincerely, Richard Hencastle.

I'd been to Blackpool before, on holiday.

And possibly that was the trouble.

From the first, it felt strange to be working there instead of playing.

To breathe the strong sea air and yet not be rushing across the promenade to

the sands.

A carefree boy again.

It was strange and melancholy.

I didn't belong to the bustling crowds of holidaymakers.

In fact, I felt as depressed there as I had done in grim, scowling Burrington.

Or was it simply that the perceptions and events in Barrington were crawling

from under their stone again?

Nancy hadn't replied, of course, either.

And to cap everything, we were staying in a boarding house full of strangers.

Their cheerful bonhomie grated as much as that of the crowds outside.

And there was a coolness between us which took a long time to thaw.

Now, let me see. What's your name?

Mine's Crab, by the way.

Ah, so you've heard of me.

I'm Richard Hernecastle. That's right, so you are. Of the Gangadun Company.

Well, you've done what you have to do here, haven't you?

What do you usually do now?

Have a drink or go for a walk. I'll tell you what we do, Mr.

Hernecastle. If you've no objection, we'll do both.

Wonderful air, isn't it?

I don't like this place.

Never did as soon as I had any sense.

It's one big money trap crammed with idiots and sharpers.

The air's wonderful.

Shouldn't be, but it is.

Pity we can't pipe it into Westminster.

You know what all this does to me, Mr. Owen Carson?

Fights.

You understand that?

I called at your boarding house this morning.

Spoke to Mr. Ollenton.

Your uncle, I believe.

He said you'd be at the palace.

That's all he did say.

Couldn't express any opinion about the crime.

Shut me up, shut himself up.

Why should he do that?

You don't think he's a suspicious character, do you?

I think everybody's a suspicious character, Mr.

Earncastle. I've enough suspicion in me to choke a horse.

Uncle Nick's a very clever man.

He's also very proud, and he's in the mystery business.

You've done that?

So far, this murder's a mystery bigger than any of his.

This one's a real thing.

He could solve it, it's all fast enough.

But it baffles him.

The great Nick Ollenton.

So he won't even discuss it.

Very neat.

You might be right.

And again, you might not.

Forgive me.

Why, if it isn't Spider Evans.

Hello, Inspector.

You wouldn't be working up here, would you, Spider?

No, I wouldn't.

Just having a holiday.

Sounds like everybody else here.

Not everybody, Spider.

I've only been here since last night, and I've spotted six or seven white boys

I know without even looking for them. So watch it, Spider.

Just play on the sounds.

Here, what does he want?

Nothing. He's barmy, love. Here, you're up to something.

No, I'm not.

I'll be watching your show tonight.

And many other nights, too.

And I'll be round at the back.

Because after all, there you all are.

And one of you did it.

Well, it wasn't me.

Well, you'd like this case solved and done with, wouldn't you?

You're all I've got to talk to.

You follow?

I don't really know the others on the bill.

I see very little of them.

Standoffish, are you, Mr. Herncastle?

I don't think so.

On an earlier tour.

Different people, well.

Made a lot of friends.

But not this time, eh?

That's the sort of thing I like to know.

Very helpful.

Thank you.

ham eating in this town than any place in the world.

Perhaps it's ham that makes them so stupid.

Tonight's audience was the stupidest I've ever known. Talk about dense.

Poor Sid Baxter.

He's our comic.

Was down to making mother-in-law gags and kippers and WC jokes. It must wreck

his heart.

Peggy, I didn't tell you. When he came up after the sketch, he coughed and

coughed and there was blood on his handkerchief.

Well, Lorna, that's his wife.

Our vocalist.

She was terribly upset.

She started crying in the dressing room.

I don't like life. I've tried it and I don't like it.

A couple of glasses, Richard.

And perhaps these young ladies will take a glass of champagne with me.

Thanks very much, Mr. Ollenton.

I could just do with one. So could I. Thank you.

What about it then, Mr. Ollenton?

You're a star-turned, booked up for years.

Loads of money.

I suppose you think life's wonderful.

Well, I don't dislike life like you do.

But there's nothing wonderful about it. Most of the time, it's like living with

a lion.

One day, you make it jump through the hoops.

But get careless.

It'll have you in a corner tearing an arm off.

I'll tell the truth.

To hell with girlish reticence.

I can bang and rattle on a piano for hours.

Keep accounts.

Cook, scrub, sew if I have to.

And I'm not afraid to take my clothes off.

Darling, what's this?

Sorry, Miss Camford, but to begin with, I'm married already.

Could live in sin.

You wouldn't suit me. You're too intelligent.

This is your chance, Maisie.

Why don't you like intelligent women?

Not to live with.

Richard here is different.

He's too young.

He wasn't for a certain West End actress I could name.

Oh, shut up, Uncle.

I should never have booked us into this monkey house.

At least they're cheerful monkeys.

That Inspector Crabbe got hold of you, I imagine.

Yeah. He wanted to discourage that and do his own work.

We didn't kill her.

Who did?

I don't much care either.

By the way, I almost forgot.

You know that dwarf I picked out at Joe Bersenbys?

Philip Tuby, the serious one.

Yeah, had a wire to say he's arriving tomorrow.

His train gets in at four.

I want you to meet him.

Have you worked out the two dwarf effect?

Give me time, lad.

No.

I just thought it might be safer for us to have another dwarf.

He can take over one or two of Barney's jobs if Barney gets any more

unallowable.

Barney will yell his head off. It's difficult enough as it is. I know he is.

Don't tell me my job.

But with a rival, he'll sharpen up his P's and Q's in five minutes. You'll see.

You're half asleep, lad.

Get to bed.

Good afternoon, Mr. Tubby.

Mr. Perncastle.

It's very kind of you to meet me. Not at all.

Can I carry that back? No, it's extremely kind, but I think I can manage

quite well, thank you.

Shall we show the grip? I think that might be a good idea.

Thank you.

Tell me, Mr. Perncastle, have you any idea what's been planned for me?

No, I don't, Mr. Tubby.

No doubt my uncle will explain.

You've been to Blackpool before?

Yes, I did a season here quite a few years ago.

At the Tower Circus.

Running on and falling about in between the acts.

With the clowns.

To amuse the children.

I'm very fond of children.

I like to hear them laughing.

But not the others.

Certainly not the others.

I'm a serious man and I think life's a very serious business.

And a whole town lending itself to frivolity and greed.

Foolishness. Can that be a good thing for our country, I ask myself.

Invariably, I reply, no, Philip, it certainly cannot.

Oh, by the way, I have a message for you from my uncle.

You're going to see him at half past 11 tomorrow morning at this address.

If you could be on time, my uncle seems to think it's very important.

Well, if it's important to Mr Alton, it's certainly important to me.

I'm looking forward to working with Mr. Allerton.

He's very much respected in the profession.

Do you know this Mrs. Shuro I'm going to be lodging with?

No, but I believe my uncle knows her.

The town's full of them. He must have asked her if she could find a bed for

him. I appreciate that very much, Mr.

Hernecastle. It's most considerate of you.

Mrs. Shura, my name's Lancaster.

Oh, Nicoleton's nephew, isn't it?

Pleased to meet you.

Come in.

And this must be the little... Mr. Tooby.

Pleased to meet you.

Come in.

It's just a small attic room, Mr. Tooby, but it's clean and comfortable.

And it's just what I'm looking for, thank you. Mrs.

Shura.

Mrs. Max, my husband.

You may have overheard us having a few words.

Pleased to meet you, Mr. Shura.

Leave your case here for Max.

You can let off steam talking to this young man.

I swear, Mr Turpin. Very clear.

Come to here, young man.

You wish a glass of beer?

Er, no, thanks.

Then excuse me.

Very personally, after shouting at my wife, we'll make a big argument.

I say we leave this country.

We get out quick.

Not to Germany or France now, beloved here, but to Holland or Switzerland,

Denmark, Sweden.

What's wrong with this country?

Sometimes perhaps I tell you what is wrong with this country.

But now I wish to leave, to go to one of those places, because soon here

will be war.

War! War!

War!

Archduke Francis Ferdinand is assassinated at Sarajevo. Have you seen?

Very badly, yes.

I have worked in Vienna.

I have worked in Budapest.

I think about international affairs.

Austria will ask too much of the Serbs and there will be war!

There's always some sort of war down there.

Down there?

It is not down there.

It will be here.

Why do you think I tell my wife we must go?

It will not be a little war.

I do not mean a little war.

50 years have been spent... And making Europe into explosive.

Five days will be enough to blow it into pieces.

Oh, do stop it, Max, for goodness sake.

And take poor little Mr. Tooby's case up to him. Just make useful for a change.

Holland, Switzerland, Denmark, Sweden.

I heard him going on at you just now.

There's not a nicer kind, Amanda Meyer, Max. But you will go on and on about all

this foreign politics.

What Austria said to Italy, what Germany's going to say to Russia.

Just as if there were all a lot of quarrelsome people in Next Street.

Listen, poor little Mr. Tube is getting it now.

It's like I'll be with him.

I wish he'd take up fretwork or stamps or something instead.

He has two pals at the Metropole, and some nights they come round here talking

at tops of their voices till all hours. I have to keep knocking on the ceiling

to get any sleep at all.

Damn time to see all those boys marching. I can't stop myself crying.

I ought to put my head in the bag. Please, Tom.

We haven't started yet, Doris.

There'll be plenty of crime before we're out of this.

See that poster there, Richard?

Kitchener wants you.

What did he say to that?

There were echoes in what Max Shurer had said, of the dire prophecies of Uncle

Nick's old Hindu.

He had foretold of rivers and oceans of blood, and he had insisted that it was

exactly what we wanted.