Original subtitles

So, in conclusion, Raul says we're all due for

some R&R, so you guys have this afternoon off.

Awesome!

Why are you still here?

Where else would we go?

Yeah, the coffee shop's back on Earth, so we don't have anywhere to hang out.

Well, this is where I'm hanging out.

You guys go somewhere else.

And stay out of trouble!

I guess we have been hanging out in the barracks too much.

Yeah...

Whoa!

It's like a city in here.

Let's check this place out.

Whoa!

Customers!

Welcome to the Chow Mein and Don't Touch Anything store.

You may either buy Chow Mein or don't touch anything.

Do you have credits?

Feel free to look around and buy things with your credits.

But don't touch anything.

Did I just hear you touch something?

Uh, nope.

Just dropping credits on the floor.

Better be credits.

Customers coming in and touching things, but don't buy anything.

Drop their credits on the ground.

Then it's my ground.

My credits!

An arcade?

Chess TV.

Dunst opening.

Night to see three.

Not a common opening.

Whoa!

Oh!

Ah!

Ew!

A brain?

Gross!

Why are you in this cage?

Why am I in this cage?

Well, there I was.

A poor country brain picking up groceries for my brain family.

As I reached for the brain baby formula, that guy jumped out

of nowhere and trapped me in this miniature steel prison.

Wow!

Why'd he do that?

I don't know.

Probably because he just doesn't like big floaty brains.

Well, that's not very fair.

I know.

And now all I have to keep me company are my chess shows.

I just want to see my wife and kids again.

Is that so wrong?

No, it isn't.

Well, tell you what.

There's a key on that wall.

You could unlock this soul-sucking enclosure

and I could be free to travel as I please.

I don't know.

I've dealt with a lot of disembodied stuff before.

You sure you're not crazy?

I assure you, I'm not crazy.

This situation is crazy.

Now, why don't you go get that key so I can stretch my stem a little?

Okay.

Fooled ya!

I'm not a country brain.

I'm an evil brain.

And I'm not married.

I'm not even dating anybody right now.

Ha-ha-ha!

Ha-ha-ha!

This is actually pretty good.

Whoa!

What have you done?

He said he wasn't crazy.

Fat Brain led a crime wave that nearly ruined this quadrant.

You must stop him.

Well, why was he locked up in a birdcage and not a maximum security priest?

Prison!

You ever imprisoned an evil brain before?

Uh, nope.

Well, then back off, man.

Just get him, all right?

Give me a boost!

Cornered, eh?

Looks like somebody isn't as smart as he thought he was.

Stay away, man.

Whoa, whoa!

He's got a stick!

Where am I gonna swing this stick?

I'm unpredictable, man!

Ah!

Not in the face!

Ah!

My chin!

I wasn't expecting that!

You guys are so dumb!

That's why you'll never catch me!

Yeah!

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Ugh!

Why is everything in space so gross?

Come on, dude.

He's gotta be here somewhere.

There he is!

Yeah!

So long!

Always one step ahead.

How are we gonna catch up to him?

I've got an idea.

Hey, could we... Yeah, yeah, come in.

You're making me miss it.

Huh?

Check this guy out!

He yells at these kids every time he walks by.

Dude just doesn't get it.

Hey, have you seen a crazy brain anywhere?

Nah, I mostly just watched that angry guy or one of my other shows.

Feel free to take a look.

We got that awkward first date, that happy big-headed man who sleeps,

and whatever this is... It's the brain!

He's headed for our dome!

Good luck, tall guy and short guy!

I hope you can make it back to channel 47!

The park!

Go, go, go, go, go, go!

Sorry!

Official space tree business!

Sorry, official space tree business!

What do we do, man?

We're gonna get in so much trouble!

No, dude.

We'll be fine.

We'll capture this brain and fix this mess before anyone finds out.

Top-notch push-ups there, Cadet.

Huh?

Who's dome is that, Cadet?

Uh, the park, sir?

Cold red!

We gotta get up there!

Dude, it's Benson!

Hello?

Why is the park blasting off into space?

I know you two have something to do with this!

Oh, so because the park is missing, we had something to do with it?

Why has your dome taken off without clearance?

I don't know.

I was just trying to eat my Tuscan chicken salad.

You don't know what's going on in your own park?

That is unacceptable!

Drop and give me 50!

Mordecai and Rigby, I have footage of you driving into your dome.

Rigby set this evil brain loose from this creepy

old guy, and now it's flying the dome into space!

What?

Why am I not surprised?

Old guy.

Someone get me, Keith, on the line!

Hello?

Why are we having another brain incident, Keith?

You said you had this under control.

It's not my fault I put him in a birdcage!

These two guys came into my shop, all touching everything!

They released the brain!

That was a dang good birdcage.

Your guys messed up, Benson!

Space tree protocol dictates we have to shoot rogue domes down!

What?

Wait!

Please just give us a chance to catch him!

Yeah!

Keith, how did you catch him?

I beat him at chess!

But that was a long time ago.

He's too good now.

You cannot beat him.

Colonel, I have a plan.

Can you give us more time?

You have ten minutes before the dome's getting blasted.

What's your plan?

I'm gonna need a chess board and a big salad.

I'm hungry.

Hey, brain!

Wait, wait, wait!

Stop!

Don't shoot!

If you shoot us with that gun, everyone will

know you couldn't outsmart us with your wits.

Ha!

Feeding you with my wits would be a million times easier than fooling this trigger.

What do you propose?

How about a game of chess?

Chess?

Chess?

You've got no chance.

If you're so sure, then let's play.

Winner gets the dome, loser leaves the dome.

And gets sucked into the vacuum of space?

Uh, yeah, I guess so.

Then I accept.

Let's play.

Did you know there are only 20 possible first moves in chess?

Pretty crazy, huh?

I choose Pawn to E4.

Are you ready for the fast-paced action of a king-pawn opening?

What will you choose?

That one?

Ha!

Ah.

Pawn to E5.

Pathetic.

Prepare to light this dome up.

Arming the park-seeking missiles.

Did you know that your skin is your largest organ?

Mine's migraine.

Your epidermis.

Or, as I like to call it, your epidumnus.

It won't help you in chess.

Queen to H5.

Horse to this square.

You calling it a horse makes me want to vomit!

Duh-huh.

Huh?

Sir, we're getting out of weapons range.

What do we do?

Then we have no choice.

Fire!

Bishop to C4.

You're probably asking yourself, what is a bishop?

Please tell me, because I'm so ignorant.

Or perhaps you're thinking...

Because your brain is so small, that the only thing

it could think of is the sound of a small breeze.

Are you ready for me to blow your mind?

Queen takes F7.

Checkmate!

I can't believe you fell for Scholar's Mate.

It's the oldest trick in the book.

Huh?

Hey!

Got him!

What?

Rawls, we got him!

Mordecai and Rigby, you ignorant geniuses!

Let me out of here!

Ew, so gross!

Pass me the chessboard.

Ah!

Stop!

Let me go!

Wait!

Stop!

No!

You haven't seen the last of me!

I'll get you for this, Mordecai and Rigby!

I really feel like getting Chow Mein.

The most���.

of the world is behind you!

The most user... You.

have a.