Original subtitles

Yo, baby. Good morning. Good morning.

That was a nice pecker.

Thank you.

How are you?

I'm doing good.

How are you doing this morning?

Oh, not bad. Got rid of all those bugs in that corner you needed me to get.

Oh, good. We needed to get the room ready for Megan.

That's right. What time are we expecting her?

Probably here shortly.

I'm just waiting for her to rub in.

Thank you so much for letting her stay with us.

Yeah, no problem. It's no big deal.

Yeah, she just needs to stay here until she can find a new place.

Her boyfriend was a piece of trash and she was just getting out of that toxic

relationship. Oh, Todd, but fuck.

Yeah, whatever his name was. What do you do now?

I don't know. What hasn't he done?

Oh, she deserves better.

Yeah, I just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate you.

Oh, that's sweet.

Only every day.

I'm so lucky to have you.

So am I. Every time I see you, I'm married.

Also, don't forget, as soon as she gets here, I'm going to run to the store to

get groceries for dinner.

So just make her feel at home.

Yeah, no problem.

What do you feel like? Something heavy, light?

Like pasta?

Maybe.

Salad?

That's too easy.

Oh, let's see.

Nothing, I just had a thought but I couldn't remember what it was. You want

garlic bread, don't you? Yeah.

Yeah, I figured.

What, the cheesy one or the regular one?

Oh, the cheese.

Of course.

You know you like that.

Morning breath.

So,

the house you walk... Like, did she catch him in the middle or track him or

just how he screwed things up? Just ongoing cheating, I guess.

I mean, she's been putting up with it for years.

Yeah.

I'm sorry. You're fine.

Gosh. You two used to go to school together.

Yeah. We graduated together.

So, well.

there's one thing i can say you're right about i am super lucky to have you i'm

lucky too babe oh

what else do you think about for making the rest of the week i don't know if you

go back to the old meal plan i haven't done that that must be her

I'm sorry what happened. It's okay.

Thanks so much for letting me stay with you guys.

Yeah, no problem.

Everything's been so hectic.

Yeah, I bet.

I'm about to go to the store here in a minute. Do you need anything?

What were you guys planning for dinner?

I think spaghetti, right?

Yeah, and garlic bread with cheese.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that works.

Do you guys want to do like a salad too?

Yeah, like a Caesar? Yeah. Sounds great. Sounds good.

All right, then I will leave you guys to it.

Do you need any extra cash?

No, I'm good. I'm going to use the car. Would you make sure that she finds the

room and gets unpacked, okay? Oh, yes, no problem.

I'll see you later.

I'll see you later.

Love you.

You know, I did set up your room, so you can follow me upstairs here.

Okay. So anyway.

Can't think worth a shit right now.

That's lousy.

Yeah, I wish I could grow a mustache.

Hey. Yo. What are you up to?

Absolutely nothing. I'm trying to think about my day.

But I can't.

You didn't do anything tonight?

No, no. It's my day off and I'm just trying to come up with something. But

I'm like... Anyway, enough about me. How are you doing?

Um... I'm doing fine.

I have to... I'm just like kind of all over the place.

Tense. I can definitely feel that.

It's a lot to take in.

And yeah. Thanks again for letting me stay.

Yeah, no problem.

It was unfortunate. I'm sorry that Dick had Todd.

What happened exactly?

You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to.

No, it's really good to talk about it.

Relax, relax.

There you go.

He, I mean, he was a typical man.

We're not all like that.

Most of you are.

But he was, I don't know.

I kept catching him cheating. It was like every, like every two weeks.

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe I was just dumb for forgiving him all the

time.

I don't know.

Like, you just walked in on him, or was it a phone, or he's just too easy to

tell he was lying all the time?

I mean, everything.

He wasn't very sneaky with it, to be honest.

Well, that just shows he had no respect for you or your communicating.

Yeah.

So?

You okay?

You're still so tense.

Yeah.

Chest rate?

There you go. Is pressure okay on your neck?

Yeah.

But yeah, and like, I don't know. He never did anything special.

And I feel like I was like doing all the work and the relationship.

And no matter what you talked about, he just dismissed and walked out?

Pretty much. And I'm playing like a bunch of fucking video games.

And he was always in between jobs. So I feel like I was like supporting

him.

So.

Well, wait,

he didn't have a job?

He sometimes had a job.

That sucks.

So it was not even part-time, just like, that late?

He kept getting fired from his jobs.

Oh, shit.

What was the common problem?

Yeah, now he probably got fired because he was cheating on me, so he wasn't

showing up to work.

That's my assumption, when I put things together.

So he just straight up dipped out, not only on you, but also his work.

For pooing.

Yeah. What a schmuck.

I'm sorry, that sucks.

Well, if you only... If you need more than a week here, more than happy to

accommodate.

Thank you.

Yeah,

hopefully I can... Hopefully it won't be too hard to find a place, but who knows.

Well, take your time.

Something like that isn't easy to get over.

Oh, by the way, did you happen to see any spiders in the room? Because I got a

bunch of them out of this corner this morning.

Spiders? Yeah.

No, I didn't see any.

Okay, that's good.

Okay, that's a good thing. Because one of them got me on the wrist.

Oh? Yeah, it sucks.

I'm sorry to hear that.

Well, they're good roommates to have sometimes.

But most of them are not venomous.

Yeah. So you paint?

Oh, yes.

Draw and a bunch of other little hobbies.

Nice. How long did it take you to do the lake one?

Oh, this one?

Oh, that took months.

It's hard to not just get to it, but actually...

let go and just let your mind wander and tune out. I mean, you know, months. It

was suggested by my therapist a long time ago when I came back from NAM.

How old are you?

I am older than I look.

But yeah.

I feel like I don't know that much about you because I got caught up.

with Todd, so I haven't been able to see Chanel as much as I wanted to.

How'd you guys meet?

Oh.

Well, sweet.

I had much shorter hair back then.

But I know what you mean.

Your heart just get caught up with the wrong person or the right one.

And... Huh.

But how we met was actually in art class.

I hated doing this stuff because it was... found it too foofy.

But she helped out a lot.

That's sweet.

Yeah. I used to pay her to do all my projects.

That's... The irony of that.

That's funny.

Well, I think I should finish unpacking.

I gotta probably get settled and everything.

Do you need a hand?

No, I think I have it all. Thank you.

Okay. It was very nice chatting with you.

Thanks for listening.

How are you doing? Hey.

I'm fine.

Just something happened while you were gone.

What's wrong?

I was chatting with your boyfriend and everything was casual but then it got

like a little awkward because while we were talking he like came up behind me

and started playing with my tit.

Did you happen to sit in the chair next to the couch?

Yeah.

Yeah, so my boyfriend and I have this little game where whoever sits in that

chair gets reused.

I'm sorry. I just told him to make you feel at home, and I think because you're

my best friend, he thought you already knew.

I'll talk to him, I promise.

Or you could talk to him. I'm not the jealous type.

No, it's okay.

You guys can keep doing what you're doing. You know how I like to watch.

All right. Sounds good. I'll see you in a bit.

See you later.

Dinner was so good.

I know. I love a good pasta.

You're going to have to give me the recipe.

So I can make it. I just buy the sauce from the store. I don't do anything

here. Well, you don't even have any sauce.

I'm not that much of a cook.

Yeah, so I mean.

Tell me about it. Oh God.

I don't know. I guess this time it was his co-worker.

Yeah. And like, I caught them in the parking lot.

No way.

Yeah. And like, I don't know. It was,

I always have like a little like inkling. You know, yeah.

That it was her and like I had asked him about it, but he's like no like you're

being crazy Like you're making shit up.

And then what do you know?

I catch them out in the fuck in our fucking apartment parking lot.

Well, he's projecting I mean, they always accuse you of what they're doing

I'm like, I don't know. So close to home. Well, that's not even lazy.

That's just disrespectful Honestly, was it at least in his own car? Was he in

your car?

He was in your car.

What? It's disgusting.

Did you make him pay for the detail?

Girl, I will call him and make him pay for the detail.

I probably should. I was just like so surprised. I locked him out of the

house.

Yeah, as you should and change the locks and throw all of his shit off the

balcony.

But like, I don't know.

He... But most of that stuff is yours anyway. You got it with your money. It's

not like he...

She pays 95% of the rent.

Yeah. I don't know. I just need to, I don't even want to be in that apartment

anymore. You're just going to give it to him?

Yeah. Like I'll, I'll figure out how to get my stuff later, but like, I don't

know. I don't know.

Cause it's also like embarrassing because I have to see my neighbors.

Yeah. Um, we did kind of like cause a scene, like I was screaming all night

long. As you should.

Well, it's fine. And then the girl got in my face.

Did you kill her?

No, I like, outed him.

Sully, barge back into your place and just start a ruckus.

No, this was all out in the front of the parking lot.

Oh, for everyone to see. Yeah, so that's why I can't live there anymore.

Well, you can stay here as long as you want.

Thank you. Yeah, of course.

but it's like it's so crazy because like first it was my sister yeah and then

it was jackie he's just making his way around everyone close to

you i'm just so glad you never did anything of course are you kidding me

that guy was ugly no offense he was coming he was i told you it's like you

you cannot take an ugly boy and give him to a pretty girl because his ego gets

too high you just look so nice yeah and like

i don't know it it's a thing that always happens like it's always fun and they're

so nice and they woo you and it's always the honeymoon phase and then and

then they your sister

I just, I don't know. I need to really figure my shit out with that, you know?

Mm-hmm.

Did he ever, oh, wait.

Did he ever contact you? That would be, that would be silly.

No, I don't think so.

Huh. I mean, I heard his number a lot.

Oh. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, because after.

The first time.

Yeah. Shit.

They didn't really like your cover.

Which rightfully so.

I just wish I would have listened to you.

Mm-hmm.

Well, I'm okay.

I just wanted to know.

I'm sorry, what was that, baby? It's okay, you're listening now.

That's true.

I just feel so stupid because it took so long.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, yes.

Well, if you want me to, I can always stick a potato in as one time.

Potato? Nice cow pipe.

Yeah. Ruin his engine.

Yep. Or uh those uh spark plugs onto the window. Mm-hmm.

I take the tubes out of his tires.

He's gonna he's gonna blame you for that one.

I think you can't blame anyone he won't know if the potato's there it shoots

out.

Yeah but once you... Or bunny in the pot.

Trust me I've done it a ton of times there's no catching that.

Are you gonna keep his dog?

No, the dog was messy. The dog was messy.

The dog was messy. He never walked it. That's what upset me. Yeah, I took care

of that dog. But like, I didn't even want the dog.

I'm like more of a cat person.

And he wouldn't let me get a cat.

He hardly took care of his own animal.

Yeah,

I don't know.

That's it. Mm-hmm.

I don't know. It feels nice.

It's gonna be, like, awkward.

So I'm gonna have to see him again.

Mm-hmm. I don't believe.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm guessing you probably feel a hell of a

lot better today than you did that night.

No, I'm still pretty angry.

Like, I... I... I mean, it's probably best that I stay here so

I don't get, like, reckless and take my mind off of things.

Get reckless.

Yeah, hell.

Like, if you need longer than a week, by all means, here to help.

That's it.

I don't know.

You have any contingencies or backup plans?

What do you mean?

I don't know. What are you going to do if this doesn't work out?

New place?

No, I plan on getting a new place.

He can have that apartment.

Like I said, it's going to be embarrassing if I have to see all my

neighbors.

And they kind of know all the drama because we were always fighting.

they can give him all the dirty looks i don't want to see any of the dirty looks

plus i was thinking of like getting a place like by the beach because it's

been a while since i've lived by the beach will be better for your health

yeah so pretty much switch at schools kind of thing no it's still pretty close

so it's only like an extra like 15 minutes and i won't mind because i

only go It's a class like two times a week.

So... Take your time with it. You'll need a full load right away.

So... It's just gonna be annoying figuring out like all of the moving and

like... Trying to see if I can even get a place like by the beach.

Don't worry about a moving company.

I'll just hit up a few of my homies and... They'll bang that out in a day.

Well, you've got your cousin Derek. He owns a movie company, doesn't he?

Yep. Oh, and he's kind of cute.

We should have grew up with Derek.

But let me get all of that situated.

He'll help you out with detailing the car, and he'll check the oil, too. He's

really handy as a mechanic.

Well, that's sweet.

Yes. but yeah i should probably figure out like my place first before i even

kind of like entertain or rebound mm-hmm yeah it was a special

cousin yeah but i mean i'd love to get to know him maybe you guys can invite

him over this week yeah yeah we'll order take out that night itself i

loved chinese

I know I'm Filipino.

Oh, okay.

Stole some cotton.

No. I know. I know.

Philippines are an island.

Yeah.

Almost.

I just can't. I just feel so

stupid.

No, not stupid.

He's stupid.

You didn't lose anything. He did.

Oh, yes. Yeah, but now he gets like... He used to say he dated me, which is

like gross. It like makes me... It makes me sick to my stomach.

If I ever like bring an ugly man around again, you guys need to just...

Does he have money? Close the door on him. Like just take me in and slam the

door on him and say, no, he's ugly.

You got it all.

yeah oh yeah yeah you got it i

don't

know maybe i need to go on vacation soon too maybe we should play a girl's trail

Yeah, we should. We should totally go on a girl's trip. We should go to Hawaii.

Yeah. Or Mexico.

Of course. I'm going to let you finish up talking. You're going to check the

laundry. Yeah. And set up the bed. I don't think he's ready for that.

Yeah. Well, have a good night. Yeah. You too.

You will.

Oh, I will.

I think Mexico would be great.

Yeah, we can leave him at home. Yeah.

We definitely don't have a wild weekend.

What stays in Mexico?

What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico.

This is so fun. It really is.

I haven't done art in so long. I know.

He stressed me out so much. Hey babe.

Both of those look nice.

Thank you.

So nice easy going day?

Yeah, you know, we're just doing things girls do when they go through shitty

breakups.

Some art therapy.

Of course.

Huh.

Good. Oh my god, I think we should go get sushi later.

I could go for some sashimi.

We were just talking about

things men want and what makes them such assholes.

Could you explain that to us?

Well, not all of us.

I mean, what Todd did was just childish.

I mean, we're assholes. There's pussies, assholes, and dicks. I'm a dick.

And there's a really big difference because assholes just really just want

to screw things up for everybody.

Well...

Honestly, comfort, to me, what I figured out works is communication,

comfort, connection, and chemistry.

And that's what every person does deserve.

Some just don't deserve a breath of life, honestly.

But that's just people in general, not just men.

Oh, this is why I'm dating you.

I did get a winner.

It took a lot to get to this point.

Oh, yeah, and just treat people how they deserve.

Oh, you know, um, really?

Huh, I don't even know how to explain what the thought process is. It's also

because of reactionary.

Hell, a lot of times we don't listen.

We just don't want to. Yeah, well, tell me about it. I feel like I'm always the

element. Well, it takes a lot of time to remember or, hell, we just don't want to

listen and just do whatever the hell we want.

And where does that get you?

Well, like I said, reactionary. Sometimes, you know, you girls just

don't respond to a logical reason.

Excuse me? Yeah.

And that's why we get frustrated and just not listen.

Which is what we're doing now.

That's not fair.

That's not really good advice yet.

I always try to improve, adapt, and just small victories at a time.

Facts.

Yeah, so does that answer your

question?

Or that was really a quick summary.

That about sums it up, babe.

You got like 50% there.

Oh, well, Todd, you just have no self-respect. And that's the major

point.

Oh, so self-respect goes into the equation?

Yeah, self-respect.

Insecurity, projection, it's all the same.

I guess that's true.

He taught you all about projecting.

Yeah, I thought I was cheating on him all the time.

That's what he went to college for.

Cheat. That's how you pass college.

I guess.

He's got an A in chemistry.

I wish

he got an A in relationships.

Or being a decent person.

Well, that's what communication class is for.

Is it?

I think that's couples therapy, babe.

A what?

Couples therapy.

Never heard of it.

It's because we don't need it.

Exactly.

Well, gotta work on yourself every morning.

How do you guys get through your problems?

That chair.

Yeah.

Interesting dynamic.

It's magical.

You know, the best way to end an argument is to have sex.

Yes. I've always been told that's not the best way.

Well, maybe not with Todd.

I guess that's true.

Well, some angry sex is some of the best sex in life.

Well, I'm probably alone on that one.

I agree with you.

Okay.

Thank you for not letting me hang alone on that one.

I'm sorry. Babe, what do you think I do most of the time when you piss me off?

Paint.

Listen.

Sit in the chair.

That makes a lot of sense.

12 years old. Oh my god. It hasn't been that long, has it?

It was like last month.

I was completely different when we first met.

Yeah, you weren't so old.

I'm kidding.

I think we've both changed a lot. I mean, you've seen the amount of times

I've dyed my hair in the past couple of years. Yeah, that's true.

I wouldn't say change.

Evolve.

Involved. Yeah, a lot of people don't change that very much.

Well, what's your favorite thing about her?

Yeah, babe, what's your favorite thing about me?

Oh, your smile.

Oh, that's so sweet. I feel like that's a cop-out.

He didn't know me when I had braces.

Oh.

I still would have liked to have kissed you then.

Besides her smile, what's your favorite thing about Chanel?

Oh.

The way I suck dick.

Yeah.

She still smiles when she does that.

Well, we were never even supposed to date. We were just hooking up.

True.

A lot of good that did us.

He just makes me so mad.

I know.

Like... He makes me mad, and I don't even like... Like, I've never even been

around him.

Have you spoken to him since the other night?

No.

It'll probably make you feel better.

In the long run, it's to just tell them to get fucked and go to hell.

Have you ever expressed that to him?

What if he records it?

That can't be while he's in court.

How?

I'm just expressing it. It's not a threat or anything like that. I don't

know. Maybe I should call him. You should.

Should I call him? Should I tell him off? Of course. You know I'm here for

the messy.

Todd?

Hi.

I just wanted to tell you what a fucking piece of shit you are.

Are you with her right now?

Oh my god.

You are the scum of the fucking earth. Oh my god.

I can't believe I spent the last five years with you.

Oh my god.

You're such a fucking loser.

No, don't put her on the phone. I don't want to fucking talk to your... No.

Oh my god. No.

You're fucked up.

Oh. Oh, because I'm calling you right now, I'm a bitch?

No. No, no, no. You're a fucking asshole.

And I hope you fucking...

Oh my god, I... You don't even have a job, dude.

They're going to fire you soon because you lose so many... You don't even come

to fucking work.

Instead, you're too busy fucking your co-worker.

Oh, I'm being immature.

You can't even, like...

Oh my God, you're almost 40 and you can't even be in a committed

relationship.

What the fuck are you talking about?

Oh my God.

No, no, no, no, no. We're not doing this right now.

I... No, no, you are... You're a

fucking man child.

but I wish I was in front of you right now so I could punch you in the face.

Do you believe what he's saying?

No, it's pretty ridiculous.

Tell him he's a little bitch.

He didn't even realize that he picked up on the first ring.

He wanted you to call him.

You're so pathetic. You were probably waiting for my call so then you can

paint me as the bad guy when you're the one who cheated on me for 10.

10 times.

The amount of people in a five-year relationship, you had two other

relationships each year.

You should tell me to go to hell.

Oh my god.

Eat shit, fuck, get fucked.

You know what?

I hope I never fucking see you again.

I'm coming to fucking get my stuff later this week and you can go to fucking

hell.

Even though I got your blood pumping, you feel better, don't you?

A little bit.

Yeah. It's good to let it out. You deserved it. You're making me hot.

Honestly, you were too nice.

You're

smart.

She's still your smart.

I can't believe I waste so much time with that loser.

Well, you know, you have to really feel it before you can let it go.

Four years old and I still can't hold a damn job.

Maybe you should date younger guys.

Or maybe men my own age.

Yeah.

I forget you're younger than us.

Well, not by much. Well, she's younger than you.

Well, I feel old. I just like them like that.

See, I was trying to take a note from your book.

Yeah.

Well, there's not a lot of good ones. You also got to think to yourself, if

he's that old and he's single, there's a reason.

It's also the magic chair.

True.

You know you like the magic chair.

Here, I'll sit down. We'll switch up.

So we are doing a sushi later.

Should be a lot about that.

I can't wait to eat sushi.

It's going to be so good.

What are you going to order?

I'm getting albacore.

I'm probably going to get vegetable tempura, avocado rolls,

because I don't eat fish.

I wonder if they have a veggie roll. Oh yeah, they do. They do. They have

vegetarian options, girl. I wouldn't take you somewhere that didn't.

Yeah, no, they also, they do like an albacore with like crunchy onions.

It's so good. Sometimes I just eat the onions and leave the fish because.

How is their seaweed salad?

Um, I don't think I've had it. Have you had it, babe? Yeah, I normally get that

along with the spicy yellowtail.

A little jalapeno on top.

Mmm.

Thank you. That was nice.

What is that? Do they have fried ice cream?

I don't think so, but I think the place down the street does. We could always

stop. Fried ice cream? Like tempura ice cream?

No, I've never heard of that.

What? Yeah, that's the first time I've heard of that, too.

I know they have mochi, but... Mmm, I love mochi.

I love a good strawberry. You know, Todd would never go to sushi with me.

It's because he's a toddler.

He just made fun of me. He's like, you don't even eat fish. Why would you want

to go to sushi?

And I was like, sushi just isn't fish. I remember him not liking seafood either,

so... Maybe that's why, because he was... I think he just didn't want to

give you the real excuse as to why he didn't want to go. Yeah. I mean, he was

a narcissist, so he was making it your fault.

Yeah. Like, you're the problem.

He was always so annoying.

Especially considering that he couldn't always get his dick hard.

Right? Like, what guy fucking you needs to take a Viagra?

Because he's old.

I know. It's so annoying.

That's me.

So am I.

Yeah, babe, but you're not, like, so old that you're not cute anymore.

Oh, thanks.

And you have a good dick.

He's extra medium.

Plus, you're nice, you know? Goes a long way.

And the fried ice cream sounds great.

Doesn't it?

Yeah, we should definitely go. I haven't been there in so long.

I wonder if that wall still works there. The one that seems to never get the

order right.

Oh God, don't annoy me.

I've already had a rough week.

If someone gets my order wrong, I'll probably just start crying in the

restaurant. Well, I know they got new owners, so maybe you fired her.

Well,

hopefully.

Yeah.

I can't deal with anymore.

I know.

It's so annoying.

I've been going through a lot lately.

Yeah.

I just don't know if I'm ever going to date again.

I don't think you should.

Be single for a while.

Come on. Fuck Derek.

Who's Derek? His cousin.

I was like, what?

See, I can't even be thinking about, like...

I was so excited last night and I rewrote my name.

That's so funny. Well, he didn't forget your name. I sent him your number.

And I won't feel bad about it. It's my cousin.

He said he's down for a rebound and however many more you need after that.

I think I will need that.

I need to take my mind off of things.

Well, we can definitely go out and take you on a date with everyone.

Let's do it.

We still need to plan that trip to Mexico.

I know, it would be so fun.

Wow.

I'm not allowed back to Mexico.

We'd have to go by ourselves.

You weren't invited anyways.

Right, of course.

It's a girl's trip.

That's a lot of Mexico.

Oh, real story.

There it is.

When should we go?

Like, July?

Yeah.

That's a good time. Or is it hurricane season? I can't remember.

I don't know. I don't think I've been to Mexico in years.

Isn't there like an El Nino? No, that's...

The Super El Nino? Yeah, that's on the Pacific side, not in the Gulf. Yeah.

I think we should be fine.

Yeah.

Well, who knows? If we mess it up, we should go again.

The only thing I ask is no cruise ships.

There's nothing scarier than being stuck on a boat in the middle of the ocean.

Yeah, no, I'm not big on cruise ships.

Babe, you know myself every time I get on a boat.

Same here.

Terrible motion sickness.

Maybe the Dramine can help me.

Oh, that's not true.

I know what CPR is.

What?

Wait, Dramine, right?

Dramine. The nausea medication, babe.

Oh.

Oh,

don't look at me like an idiot.

Both of you just stared at me. For many reasons, I love him.

Oh, at least I was listening. Trying to.

I mean, I guess that's more than many.

Yeah.

Drowning. Like he said, he's not like most guys.

You could have an interesting one on your hand. Yeah.

It's okay. He's fun.

Better than Todd.

Yeah. Seems like it.

A little bit.

I don't know.

Are you saying you're a little bit like Todd?

Oh, I don't have a dog. You know what's crazy, though? He never wanted to hang

out with you guys.

I could never get him to come over with me. Because I didn't like him, and he

didn't like me calling him out on his bullshit.

Yeah, and I'm offended that he didn't even hit her up. Huh.

Jackass. I'm not a jelly person.

Is this one of your men 101 booklet?

I'm dead, dude.

If anything, she deserves to be hit on all the time.

I mean, you're not wrong.

And so are you.

But why would you want her best friend's boyfriend to... Ego.

I guess that's true. The good thing is I would have been the only one of your

friends that never did anything.

True. Or I could have maneuvered him and... And

that's probably why he never wanted to hang out with us.

He deserved it.

Honestly.

Oh, gosh.

Well, you know, I always felt Todd would be very boring.

And he was kind of boring.

He never wanted to do anything.

No, he just wanted to play video games and fuck anything that walked.

Other than you.

How was that, by the way? Was that any fun at all?

You know what? It's crazy.

It's always the men with little dicks who cheat the most because they have

something to fucking prove.

Yeah.

How tiny?

That's fucking sorry.

Just like the board games.

I find it kind of funny that he was able to fuck so many people considering the

fact that he has a tiny dick.

Well, that's why they never really laugh.

No repeat offenders.

Except for me.

But you were in love with him. It wasn't the cleanest. Trust me. That's not why

you stayed.

No. But I don't know why I was in love with him.

Daddy issues?

No.

That was me.

I think... You know what?

It's because I got it on.

relationship yeah so yeah that makes a lot of sense

you know let's take derek to sushi and then we'll go egg todd's car yeah that

fancy new paint job you guys gonna get i can't believe he could even afford that

yeah i mean he painted like the worst color of green ever like lime green he's

so embarrassing

Yeah, it's just crazy.

Oh my gosh.

I feel like fried ice cream right now. Yeah.

Yes. I guess we should go get some food. That sounds very fuckatastic.

Oh hell.

Yeah, and I'll have my dare cover.

I'm going to do that right now.

Thank you, ladies.

You can stay here as well. as you want thank you