Original subtitles

(frogs croaking)

(ominous music)

(heavy breathing)

(tree branch rustles)

[Ominous Figure] Oh, shit!

Bloody hell.

(sign creaks)

(lightning cracks)

(ominous music)

(footsteps crunch)

(lightning cracks)

(ominous music)

(toilet flushes)

(wolf howls) (ominous chanting)

(gunshots fire) (man and woman screams)

(woman screams)

(woman screams)

(man screams)

(victims scream)

Please, no, no!

Don't hurt me! No, please, no!

(victims scream)

(man screams) (glass shatters)

(rope creaks)

(woman screams)

(lightning strikes)

No, let me go!

Please, don't hurt me! I won't tell anyone, I swear!

I swear, don't hurt me!

You know, you're really a very attractive man.

You are, you really are.

You know, just, you and I,

we could have a really good time together.

I know what you want,

you want these, don't you?

Oh my God, did you say to "take away?"

(victim screams)

(ominous music)

(dramatic music) (lightning strikes)

(lightning strikes) (thunder rumbles)

(indistinct police chatter)

(sirens wail)

(police radio chatters)

(door thuds shut)

(police radio chatters indistinctly)

Colin, get this lot out of here,

'cause I'm coming 'round.

I can't see what I'm doing here.

Go on, get on with it. - Right-o, guv.

(ominous music)

Oscar delta two.

(officer sniffs)

(gurney rattles)

(ominous music) (blood drips)

(newspaper machine rattles)

(birds chirping)

Did you see that?

What?

That road sign back there.

I think it said the B2067.

Did it?

I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

Because if it did, then we're on the wrong road again.

Oh, I wouldn't worry.

We'll be all right.

We're supposed to be on the A5027.

Well keep an eye out.

We'll see another sign,

or we could even stop and ask somebody.

This is stupid.

That's not stupid at all.

We're dedicated scientists

and there have been strange, inexplicable,

radioactive readings picked up in this area,

which have been traced to a particular house,

and we are on a secret government mission

with other scientists

to investigate this bizarre phenomenon.

It's as simple as that.

(car horn honks)

Yes, but right now, I'm trying to read this map.

I find this case enthralling.

Have you read all the reports?

[Barbra] Yes.

Well if you had, you'd know about

the strange things that have taken place

in that house years ago.

Do you realize that 18 people

were murdered there one night?

Coincidence. And anyway,

lightning never strikes twice.

Well, it did that night.

Two people were struck by lightning,

two throats were slit, one was hung,

two were axed, four people were skewered in the same bed,

and a man watching simply blew up.

[Barbra] What happened to the other six?

What?

You said they were 18.

Oh, yes. Yes, the other six.

They were found frozen to death in the deep freeze,

all wrapped in cling film.

They'd been shot.

Bullthit.

What do you mean, bullthit?

Because it is, that's why.

I mean, so what if 18 people

were killed there in one night?

There could be any number

of logical explanations for that,

and anyway, it was years ago.

Are you sure this is the A5027?

Well, how should I know?

All these country roads look alike to me.

Anyway, you've got the map.

Have I?

Do you always drink like that?

My dear, we are but humble scientists

accidentally thrown together in this macabre investigation.

I see no reason why my drinking habits

should be called in question.

(birds chirping)

(chickens clucking)

(car doors shut)

(birds chirping)

(indistinct pub chatter)

Excuse me, I wonder if you could tell us

if we're on the right road.

We're looking for a place called Headstone Manor.

I don't understand, have I said something wrong?

(Lukas stammers) Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I...

(zipper zips) Thank you. Awfully sorry.

(indistinct pub chatter)

(birds chirping)

Eighteen people murdered in one night.

It certainly gives one something to think about.

The work of a maniac, I'd say.

Wouldn't you?

Mm, I'm not so sure.

What do you mean?

Well, how do you account for the radioactivity readings?

What are you trying to say?

I'm trying to say there's something here

that doesn't smell quite right.

Yes, I know. I'm terribly sorry.

I'll open the window.

(Stephen sighs)

You see, there were radio activity readings

at the time of the murders,

and the killer was never found.

Plus, the fact that 200 years ago,

a very similar incident happened in that house.

Add all those things together and well, need I go on?

Yes.

[Stephen] Well, it's obvious, isn't it?

What is?

All the facts are there.

That's just it, all the facts aren't there.

One can't assume these things.

That's the trouble with life today.

Too many people assume things

and then form opinions wrongly based on false assumptions.

- You mean? - Precisely.

People always assume because

I'm not interested in football,

or swigging beer in the local pub every night,

and would rather stay at home

and run up a new pair of curtains,

I must therefore, in some way, be less than a man.

My experience exactly.

(birds chirping)

Why don't we just get out of here?

No, not yet.

Have you noticed that strange mark on the wall?

Yes. (eerie music)

So an emblem of some sort, what about it?

I'm sure I've seen it somewhere before.

Look at those men playing cards over there.

(eerie music)

Interesting.

What do you make of it?

Nothing.

(ominous music)

(glasses clatter)

(cane taps) (tables crash)

Another point of your regular, please, Becky dear.

This isn't the bar, it's over there.

I'm sorry, I'm thanking you.

Stay away from the house of death.

I think this is it.

- What? - Look, look.

Are you talking about Headstone Manor?

Stay on the road. Keep out the woods.

Which way did you see the bar was?

It's over there.

I be thanking you.

(glass shatters)

Eighteen in one night? Phew.

God, that must have put you off sex for life.

Not really, life goes on.

You're one brave lady.

I suppose you had a psychiatrist.

Yes, one of them was a psychiatrist!

You're kidding me.

No, he was the last one

and he made me tell about the other 17.

Oh, God, some people are disgusting.

Well, that's enough about me anyway.

Let's talk about you.

Well, there's not much to tell, really.

After a brilliant career at university,

I entered the field of paranormal research

and when they offered me the chance

to come to England on this type of investigation,

I jumped at it.

No deep, dark secrets then?

Well, I'm not sure.

You see, I suffer from a rare type of amnesia.

My brain works perfectly in relation

to my work and general, every day details,

even complex intellectual exercises.

But when it comes to my personal life,

and relationships and feelings,

I just can't remember.

It all started when this mole appeared on my arm.

I thought that was a birth mark.

Well, you thought what was a birthmark?

(people chattering loudly)

Well, you can't blame the locals

for being suspicious, love.

I mean, we've had some strange things

happening around here. - Yes.

And all because of that house.

You know what happened up there, don't you, love?

Only too well.

There were 18 people murdered.

Yes, no, I do know, actually.

He told me, thank you.

Two were struck by lightning.

Yes.

Two throats were slit.

(Barbra laughs awkwardly)

One hanged, two had an ax in their head.

Yes.

Four people skewered in a bed.

And six in the freezer?

What?

Well, six were frozen, you see.

And wrapped in cling film.

No, no, love. Not six,

because that would make 19.

No, twelve and six are 18.

I know that, love.

But they were 13 without the freezer.

Look, we've got it wrong.

Let's count them.

Two were struck by lightning.

Right.

- Two throats were slit. - That makes four.

One hung and two axed.

Hanged.

All right, hanged. And one blew up.

No, it was the four in the bed next.

That's right, four skewered.

And one blew up.

No, wait a minute.

We've counted him twice.

- [Barmaid] No we haven't. - No, yes I have.

That was old Ralph from down the road, you know?

No, no, it wasn't.

Ralph didn't blow up,

Ralph was in the freezer with the other five.

That would make sense,

because there were six in the freezer. I remember that.

No, Ralph wasn't one of them. He blew up!

Because I remember, his missus said

she could only recognize him by his watch.

So wait a minute. Where are we?

There were never five in a bed.

[Crowd] No, no, no.

There were four in the bed.

[Crowd] Four in the bed.

Two struck by lighting.

[Crowd] Two struck by lightning.

Two throats were slit.

(indistinct muttering) (calculator beeps)

One hanged. (crowd mutters indistinctly)

Another Bloody Mary, love?

Yes, please.

- One hanged. - One hanged.

[Old Man] One hanged.

(indistinct chatter)

♪ Two throats a cutting ♪

♪ Four in a bed ♪

♪ One blew up ♪

♪ One was hanged ♪

♪ Two were axed ♪

♪ And six were frozen to death ♪

(crowd cheers)

(bell rings)

[Landlord] Time, gentlemen. Please.

Come on, now!

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen!

(ominous music)

[Barbra] Why couldn't you have done this

before they closed the pub?

[Lukas] Sorry, won't be long.

Will you hurry up?

(zipper zips) (twig snaps)

(twig snaps)

(ominous music)

(Lukas screams)

[Barbra] What is it? What is it?

It's the barmaid!

Barmaid, what's she doing in the bushes?

She's dead.

Dead?

Yes. Quick, let's get out of here.

I'll call the police from the house.

(eerie music)

(car doors thud)

(tree branch rustles) - [Ominous Figure] Oof!

For heaven's sakes!

(phone rings)

[Operator] Hello, police. Can I help you?

Yes, I'd like to report a dead body.

[Operator] Yes, sir. What type of a dead body?

Type?

Upside down with big chests.

What's that gonna do with it?

[Operator] I see, sir.

Where are you calling from?

Look, this is Dr. Lukas Mandeuville.

I'm calling from Headstone Manor.

(phone clicks) (line buzzes)

Hello? (phone cradle clicks)

Hello? (Lukas sighs)

(phone rings)

Chief Inspector Goule here. Can I help you?

Ah, yes. Chief Inspector,

this is Dr. Lukas Mandeville from Headstone Manor.

Are you still there?

- [C.I. Goule] Yes, sir. - Ah, good.

I'd like to report a dead body

in the woods, next to the pub.

Yes, sir. Hanging upside down from a tree is she?

That's right. How did you know?

No worries, sir. We'll find her all right.

You just leave it to us.

We'll be in touch.

(eerie music) (indistinct chatter)

First of all, I'd like to welcome you all

to Headstone Manor.

My name is Dr. Lukas Mandeville

and this is my assistant, Dr. Barbara Coyle.

I'm sorry we were a little late getting here today,

but I'll explain all about that later.

I assume you've all introduced yourselves,

having arrived on time, unlike Barbara and myself.

But for now, I'd just like to say what a pleasure it is

to be associated with such

a distinguished international team

of specialists as yourselves.

Right.

And I really look forward to working with you all.

And I'm sure you'll agree

that given the scientific expertise

gathered together in this room, and the equipment,

which I'm pleased to say

Is already assembled and installed,

I feel that we can put an end, once and for all,

to the suspicious rumors and the mumbo jumbo

that exists concerning this old house.

(group mutters agreement)

Oh, by the way, there is just one little thing.

In fact, the reason why Dr. Coyle and |

were a little late today,

there's been a murder. - Murder?

- Murder? - Murder?

- Murder? - But who is it?

Who's being killed? Who?

Oh, no. Not to worry about, I assure you.

Oh my God, this is the House of Death!

No, no, no. It's nothing to do with the house.

It's just the barmaid at the local pub

was found dangling upside down from a tree

with her throat cut. - Her throat cut!

(Sheila laughs hysterically) Oh my god, this is terrible.

Miss Finch, please! (Sheila laughs, screams)

She's hysterical.

There's only one thing for it.

- What? - A slap in the face.

- Yes, you're right. - Yes, that ought to do it.

(slap lands) (Sheila sighs)

Thank you very much.

I feel much better now.

Thank you.

[Barbra] What is this?

I don't know, she just slapped me in the face.

No, no, not that. This.

(music box music plays)

What is it?

Don't you see?

Oh my God.

It's hideous!

Yes, they seem to be depicting

all the murders that took place here many years ago.

[Stephen] But what does it mean?

It means someone is trying to scare us.

Someone, or something, doesn't want us in this house.

(blowtorch hisses)

Why did you do that?

I always do.

It has served its purpose, my dear,

and is of no further use.

I think it's stupid.

You think it is stupid?

You say that to me, the arch disciple of Lucifer himself?

You are but a grain of sand,

a mere speck in the cosmos,

and you dare to venture an opinion

regarding that great design

of our master, Diablos Supremus?

To think that I, the right hand of Beezebub himself,

should be subjected to the opinions

of churels and hobbledehoys!

Bow thy knee if you wish to even speak in my presence.

Oh, piss off.

Piss off?

For 700 years, I have served our master faithfully,

enduring the agonies of the undead,

the tortures of eternal servitude.

Obeying his every command,

anticipating his every whim,

his slave, his servant, never diverting from his purpose,

devoted to that cause to which

I have surrendered my mortality,

condemning myself to everlasting torment

in the presence of that great cause,

to which we, the undead, have all sworn our allegiance.

I, a humble butcher, was chosen to lead us

and to faithfully discharge my duties in his service

for all of the centuries that we have dwelt in this place.

And you tell me to piss off? You piss off.

Has he gone?

No such luck.

But the strangers are still in the house.

They've not being scared off. What must we do?

The sacred house must be purged.

This was merely a prelude, a testing of their nerve.

But they have chosen to defy us.

Therefore, they must pay the price.

The ceremony must take place.

The master returns tonight.

How shall we recognize him?

You'll know him when you see him, stupid.

Tonight is the night of blood.

Oh! - Christ, here we go again.

(eerie music)

(prosthetic leg creaks)

(knocking on door)

Who is it?

Doctor, I'm sorry to disturb you.

It's you.

What's that?

It's a shirt.

I suppose you don't like talking about it.

Well, there's nothing to say, really.

It's a shirt.

No, your leg.

Oh, my leg. Oh, it's nothing.

I'll hang it up.

No, no, please don't.

You don't mind if I continue?

No, go ahead.

Would you mind if I had one of these?

No, no. Feel free.

Well,

what do you think of our little team, then?

Well, oh! (Barbra laughs nervously)

You seem a little rattled.

No, no, no, no.

Well, I am just a little concerned about Miss Finch.

I mean, that was quite a display

she put on downstairs, don't you think?

Oh, she's a dedicated scientist.

She just lost her head for a moment, that's all.

As for that young American chappy

and those two effeminate people,

I mean, really, it's quite an amusing group.

Why are you laughing?

There's no laughing matter.

We're scientists, that's the important thing.

Come now. I mean, what do you think

they're doing at this very moment?

They're sitting in their room laughing at us.

- Laughing? - Yes.

Laughing at me?

They wouldn't dare, I won't stand for it. Not anymore.

I know what it's like to be laughed at.

Years of painstaking, backbreaking research,

only to be laughed at by lesser people.

Ridiculed for being ahead of my time, being struck off.

Never allowed to operate again!

I'm a surgeon, you know!

The greatest surgeon in the world.

And now, I'm reduced to this

smart ass paranormal research crap!

And all because they laughed at me.

They never understood.

They struck me off the register! Me!

Dr. Ludwig Manheim, the greatest surgeon in the world!

I'm a surgeon, I tell you! A surgeon!

(Barbra whimpers, chokes)

I had no idea.

So you were a surgeon, were you?

How very interesting.

Do tell me all about it.

(Lukas pants)

It was a very long time ago.

I was the head surgeon at the Frankfurt General Hospital.

The most respected surgeon in all of Germany.

(monitor beeps)

But I was surrounded by fools,

inconsequential, jealous fools.

They knew I was the best and they hated me for it.

They all stood there praying that I would make a mistake,

one little mistake, so they could laugh at me.

And then, it happened.

A slight, trivial error.

(monocle splats) (attendants laugh)

It could have happened to anybody.

And even though I quickly made expert attempts

to rectify the situation, they laughed!

(attendants laugh hysterically)

It was a severe test of my self control.

(attendants laugh)

I decided to reprimand them.

Stop laughing at me! Stop laughing!

I insist you stop laughing!

Still, they laughed and laughed.

I could not believe such unprofessional behavior!

(patient laughs)

Suddenly, I realized what these fools had made me do.

They were trying to embarrass me in front of my patient.

They all turned against me because I was the best!

I was the best, I tell you! The best!

I was the best, I tell you! The best!

Where am I?

We're in bed and you are not the best.

(water drips) (mouse squeaks)

(eerie music)

Oh my God, this place is a mess.

(ominous music) (Deborah gasps)

Hi, there. I thought you might need a helping hand.

It's you! You scared me.

I know. Hey, this place is a mess.

I know, but it is the kitchen.

There must be some food somewhere.

Okay, let's check it out.

Okay.

Hey, what's this? A microwave?

(clock ticks softly)

(Sheila hisses)

(children shouting) (somber music)

(ominous music)

Mummy?

Mummy!

(door creaks)

Sheila, you wicked slut!

(Sheila shouts)

I saw you!

I saw you! Come here! - I didn't, I didn't!

- Put it on! Put it on! - No, please! Please!

- Put it on! - Don't make me put it on!

You wicked, sinful girl, put it on!

Down on your knees!

Now you know what you must do. - Please, Mummy!

- Oh, yes! Oh, yes! - No, please, Mummy!

Come on, please forgive me, I've been bad!

Please forgive me, I've been bad!

(whip cracks) (Sheila screams)

I'm sorry that I made you sad.

- I'm sorry. - Yes, yes!

- I'm sorry. - Say it to him!

I'm sorry that I made you sad.

Mummy says I've cause you pain!

- No, Mummy, please! - Yes! Say it!

My mummy said I caused you pain.

I'll never, ever sin again!

Say it louder! Tell him!

- I'll never, ever -- - Ever sin again!

- Sin again! - Again!

Again!

Say it again!

Please forgive me, I've been a --

- Bad! - Bad --

[Mother] Why are you stopping?

- I'm sorry! - Yes! Say it!

No, please, don'.

Don't stop. Say it, say it!

Now, say it again!

My mummy says I've caused you pain.

I'll never, ever sin again! (whip cracks)

Please forgive me, I've been bad.

I'm sorry if I made you sad.

My mummy says I caused you pain,

I'll never, ever sin again.

[Mother] You've stopped. Say it again.

Say it again! (wind blows loudly)

Say it again!

(Mother screams)

(screaming cont.)

(eerie music)

(clock ticks)

There's nothing in there either.

[Henry] Have you checked the fridge?

Yes. It's empty.

You're right, it's empty.

I wonder what's happened to the chef.

Well, he hasn't arrived yet.

That's strange. You think he'd have arrived first

to get things ready.

Well, I thought so.

But nobody's seen him and nobody's heard from him.

Oh, we'll just have to manage ourselves.

Pass me a knife, would you?

I suppose a fork's out of the question.

Not necessarily, but let's have dinner first.

Okay.

Are you sure that's not a birthmark on your arm?

What, this? Yeah, it's a mole.

I'm quite pleased with it, really.

It stops me from being absolutely perfect.

It's quite big, isn't it?

I've had no complaints.

Well, let's see after dinner, shall we?

Okay.

To be honest with you,

I'm a bit worried about dinner.

There's not enough food here.

That's not all I'm worried about.

What do you mean?

Well, it's this place.

It's so, you know... creepy.

Hey, all these old places are the same,

especially if they've been empty for a long time.

They're always full of old cobwebs and squeaky floorboards.

Mm, but this place has such a horrible history,

as if those tortured spirits are still here.

Can you feel it?

Oh, I'd like to, but someone might come in.

They're all busy upstairs.

Hey, you're right.

(loud footsteps)

(floorboard creaks) (ominous cello music)

(door creaks)

Do you mind?

(door creaks, slams)

I'm terribly sorry!

No, we mustn't. We mustn't.

We must find some food.

[Henry] Yeah, okay.

There must be something around here somewhere.

What's that?

(Deborah screams)

Hey, hey. Don't worry, just a dead rat.

Probably got trapped in there, that's all.

It's like I said, all these old places are the same.

They're always full of squeaky floorboards and cobwebs.

There's nothing to worry about.

(wood creaks)

Is everything all right in here?

I'm sure I heard a scream.

(loud bang)

(Henry stammers)

No, it was just a dead rat.

A dead rat screamed?

No, no. It was her. The rat's on the table.

Oh, hmm. What's for dinner?

We haven't found much yet,

have you heard from the chef?

No. Not a word.

I'll call London in the morning.

What's in the freezer?

No, this is the fridge.

Yes, I know that. The freezer's in the cellar.

The cellar?

(eerie music) (door creaks)

(wood steps creak)

Come on, it's down here.

(ominous, heavy breathing)

(door creaks)

Yes. This is definitely the freezer.

Ah, look at all that meat.

Well, it's no good to us tonight,

it's frozen solid.

I don't like it down here.

My God, what's this?

It looks like a meat pie.

Hey, we can defrost this.

It should fit in the microwave.

What do you think?

I think we can,

but can we just take it and get out of here?

It's freezing.

Right you are.

Hey, this looks delicious.

Well, anything's better than dead rat.

Ow!

(ominous music)

Oh, master, we are preparing for your arrival.

[Group] Oh, master, we are preparing for your arrival.

For you are the prince of darkness.

[Group] For you are the prince of darkness.

And we are, oh, shit! My hand!

[Group] Oh, shit, my hand!

Stupid bloody candles!

[Group] Stupid bloody candles.

- Shut up! - [Group] Shut up!

Stop it, would you stop it!

[Hooded Figure] Would you stop it!

There's always one.

To the woods!

[Hooded Figure] To the woods!

(shuffling)

(boxes clatter)

(objects clattering and erasing)

(door creaks)

(door creaks)

(spear whooshes)

(Sheila sniffing)

Oh, Ms. Finch, I've been trying to find you.

(Lukas sniffing)

I had a message to come and see you.

Yes. (Lukas sniffs)

Oh, Christ.

There's something in the machine room

I think you should see.

Oh, let's get out of here.

Well, come along, Miss Finch, what is it?

Well, it's really very strange.

I don't know what to make of it.

It's not like anything I've seen before.

I really want your opinion on it.

Oh, fine. Lead the way.

(eerie music)

(wind whistling)

Well, as you can see, the equipment is now wired up.

Yes, yes, yes.

All the high frequency sensors

and scanners have been connected.

Every inch of the house is covered.

- Good. - So if there is

any paranormal activity,

it should register on these measures.

- Good, then. - And when

we first switched it on -- - Yes.

We picked up the usual static,

electrical charges that are

always there. - Yes.

But then something quite disturbing happened.

Really?

Take a look at this.

(frantic electrical beeping) (alarms sound)

There's something going on here.

Are you sure it's not the machinery?

I'm sure.

And you've checked the connections?

Yes.

You've realigned the scanners?

Yes.

You've equalized the high frequency sensors?

Yes!

You've allowed for the multi-charge buildup

on the cable returns.

Yes.

And you've farted again.

(Lukas sighs in disgust)

Terribly sorry.

(klaxons sound) (machinery chirps)

(eerie music) (wind whistling)

(presence sniffs)

(key latch clicks)

(items crash)

(light buzzes) (Barbra screams)

(door rattles)

(Barbra screams)

(fabric rips) (lights crash)

No, no! Go away! No!

No! Oh!

Please, please, no! No, no!

(Barbra pants fearfully) Ooh.

That's really nice. Ooh.

Ooh. (Barbra squeals)

(Barbra laughs, squeals pleasurably)

Oh, you dirty devil!

Ooh, I love it!

On, I really love it.

This is fantastic.

Oh.

(Barbra moans) (bed squeaks)

(Barbra screams in pleasure) (triumphant music)

(pitcher clatters)

(light thuds)

That was wonderful.

Did the room move for you too?

I thought the music was a lovely touch.

(presence grunts)

How thoughtful.

Ta.

(wood creaks)

On, it's you.

Are you all right?

I thought I heard noises.

Yes, I have never been better.

Oh, good. Dinner's almost ready.

I'll see you downstairs.

I'll be done as soon as I can.

Oh, I get it.

Just another one night stand.

I suppose I'll never see him again.

(ominous chanting)

(blind man grunts)

[Sheila] At least the table's passably clean now.

Thank you very much.

[John] Where's Doctor Coyle?

Oh, she said she'd be down in just a moment.

Fortunately, we found the wine.

[John] Hmm, yes. Yes.

I'm not sure about this pie.

- Do you wanna -- - Yes, very small.

Well, I've never seen readings like it before in my life.

It's the machines, it must be.

They can't be wired up correctly.

I agree, it must be a malfunction.

Well, I'm not so sure.

You know, I remember a case very similar to this

several years ago,

and that certainly wasn't machines.

[Sheila] Are you sure you weren't over thinking things?

Well, I don't like anything that I can't see.

Well, Miss Kedding, sometimes the unseen

can be very interesting.

Sorry I'm late.

[Lukas] Would you like a little wine?

Thank you, lovely.

(ominous chanting)

♪ Daisy, Daisy ♪

♪ Give me your answer do ♪

♪ I'm half crazy over the love of you ♪

♪ It won't be a stylish wedding ♪

(ominous chanting)

(eerie music)

Oh, hear me, mighty ruler of the power of darkness.

All powerful Lucifer, once cast down,

but now about to rise to reign over us,

your loyal subjects.

The hour is nigh, oh, Diablos.

And we, your humble servants,

are preparing the ground for your return

to the house of death.

(lightning crashes)

Yes, I know we screwed up the last time

and there were intruders in your sacred house, but --

(lightning crashes) (thunder rumbles)

Yes, I know there are intruders there now,

(lightning crashes) but they are scientists

and their earthly powers exceed ours.

We tried to scare them off, but we failed.

(lightning crashes)

He says he's pissed off at the way we've handled things.

[Blind Man] I mean, what were we supposed to do?

(group mutters indistinctly)

(lightning crashes)

But he's got a new plan.

[Group] Ah, good. Good.

(lightning crashes)

He says we must gather up

all the fagots and burn them.

[Theresa] I'm not sure I like the sound of this.

[Hooded Figure] Don't worry, brother Theresa.

He means wood.

Hurry, grab the fagots.

(group mutters indistinctly) (lightning crashes)

We're doing it, we're doing it!

Stop being so testy.

Yeah, I've seen those emblems.

I have no idea what they are.

They don't seem to relate to anything I've seen before.

Yes, you remember we saw one

on the wall of the local pub.

- [Barbra] Hmm. - Did you?

Yes. Not only on the wall,

I mean, everybody in the village

has one tattooed on them somewhere.

That is unbelievable.

Well, I think it has something

to do with the history of this house.

I mean, eighteen in one night.

Have you been talking?

No, no. He means the murders.

Oh, that's a relief.

(Lukas chuckles)

(Lukas sputters)

Lukas, are you all right? (Lukas gags, wretches)

(plates crash)

(Lukas screams)

What's happening?

(Barbra screams)

(group shouts in fear and disgust)

(Lukas groans and shouts)

(Lukas pants and sighs)

(Lukas groans and shouts) (group shouts)

(Lukas screams and sighs)

(Lukas burps) - Oh, that's better.

Sorry about the mess.

Hurry, hurry, there's not much time.

The fire must be blazing at midnight!

Quick, the matches!

[Hooded Figure] I've not got the matches,

have you got the matches?

[Hooded Figure 2] I don't carry matches.

I have the matches, Master.

Well, don't just stand there.

Light the fagots!

[Theresa] I wish you'd stop saying that!

If the shoe fits, wear it.

But why isn't the flame burning?

Forgive me, Master.

It's too windy, the matches won't light.

Oh, they must light.

Protect the flame with my robe, you fool.

Yes, Master.

Quick, the exalted one needs the fire

in order to materialize.

I've got it, Master. I've got it!

Good, good. We've done our task.

The fire is burning!

(fire crackles)

No, it's me that's burning. You schmuck!

I'm on fire!

Well, where are you going?

Oh, this is just great,

the exalted one is about to arrive and I'm on fire.

I'm gonna miss the whole goddamn thing!

I don't believe it, 700 years undead and now this.

You try to be Mr. Nice Guy and what do you get?

Well, at least I'm wearing my old robes.

Oh, God, it's hot. (group wails anxiously)

(indistinct group chatter)

(machines chirp and buzz)

(tense music) (frogs croaking)

(lightning crashes)

(ominous chanting)

Oh, Master!

(followers scream fearfully)

(followers screaming) (explosions booming)

I can see! I can see!

I can see!

(followers screaming) (explosions booming)

What the devil was that?

Sounds like a lot of monks exploding.

(explosions boom)

There's definitely something going on out there.

I don't like this, it's too quiet.

(John crashes)

Excuse me, must have been the meat pie.

(ominous chanting)

(zipper zips)

(ominous chanting)

(machines beep and chirp)

Yes, there's definitely something going on here.

Well spotted, Lukas.

Are you laughing at me?

Don't ever laugh at me! - Lukas.

Nobody's laughing at you.

And why are you speaking in that German accent?

I am not speaking in this German accent.

- Lukas. - Now, listen to me,

there is nothing supernatural going on in this house.

Someone is simply trying to scare us.

And they're succeeding.

Shut up!

(machines whir)

Look at the machines.

They're stabilizing.

What does it mean, doctor?

I'm not sure.

It could mean that the crisis is over,

if there ever was a crisis in the first place.

On the other hand, a power strong enough

to cause the readings we had a moment ago

could conceivably have the power and intelligence

to neutralize our machinery.

In which case, it could be in the house right now.

Oh my God!

On the other hand, it can't be in the house now

because if it was in the house,

it'd be registering on the instruments.

But you said it could have the intelligence

to neutralize the instruments.

Yes, I know I said that, but I don't believe it.

[Sheila] Why not?

Because I think there's nothing out there. It's a hoax.

I think somebody's just trying to scare us off.

Yeah, so do I.

What do you know about it?

Now, look here, I think we ought

to search the house immediately.

We'll divide up into pairs.

Stephen, Elliot, you stay here and watch the machinery.

- Right. - Okay?

The rest of you, follow me.

(Barbra grunts in pain)

(machines beep and hum)

(eerie music)

(door creaks shut)

(eerie music)

(footsteps thud) (Barbra shushes)

(door creaks, thuds)

(eerie music)

(ominous laughter) - Who was that?

Where are you?

Who's laughing?

Come out, you Schweinehund!

(ominous laughing) Who is there?

(Lukas grunts, shouts)

My leg!

It's stuck to the floor!

(Lukas grunts, shouts) (prosthetic leg clicks)

(fabric rips)

(Lukas shouting indistinctly)

(eerie music) (Lukas gasps)

It's my identical!

(Lukas sputters and gasps)

No, no, no!

(Lukas shouts fearfully)

(electricity zaps)

(Lukas screams)

(ominous music)

(machines beep)

(phone rings)

That's strange, I thought the phone was dead.

Why do you think that?

They usually are in situations like this.

- I'll get it. - Mm.

(phone rings)

Hel -- (Stephen groans)

Oh, come on, you old tart, get off the phone.

(ominous music)

Oh, we're back, are we?

Who was it, wrong number?

Well, who was it?

What's the matter, have you lost your tongue?

Do you realize you've been on that phone...

Stephen.

Stephen?

Oh my God!

(Elliot gags)

No, it's me!

Does this count as suicide?

(Elliot groans)

Oh, Dr. Harrison, where's Miss Finch?

I left her downstairs with Elliot and Stephen.

What's it like up there?

- Quiet. - What?

It's all right.

Where are we off to?

To the khazi.

The khazi?

- John. - Yes?

No.

Listen, we'll go back up there and check again,

and we'll meet you downstairs later, okay?

But be careful.

(footsteps thudding)

(eerie music)

(clock ticks)

(eerie music)

(ominous music)

(shiv slices)

(John shouts)

(tense music)

(light switch clicks)

(door creaks)

(Henry sighs)

(shower hisses)

(water splashes)

(faucets creak)

(door squeaks)

(handle rattles)

(Henry shouts fearfully)

(tiles crash)

(water drips)

(water bubbles) - [Eerie Voice] Henry, Henry!

Henry!

(Henry gurgles)

Henry?

Henry, where are you?

Henry.

Henry!

(Deborah screams)

Henry? Oh my God.

Oh, oh, Henry!

(Deborah screams)

Oh, Henry! Oh, it's you!

Oh, thank God you're alright.

I thought you had, oh,

but how can? And then who is in the?

Oh, Henry, never mind. It doesn't matter.

All that matters is that you're safe

and I love you, I love you.

I love every inch of you, Henry.

Even the mole on my arm?

Yes, even the mole on your arm.

Oh my God! (Deborah screams)

(mole snaps its teeth) (Deborah groans in pain)

(gate creaks)

(owl hoots)

You wicked slut! (Sheila shouts)

Again! Again! (Sheila sobs)

(owl hoots)

- No, Mummy, please! - [Mother] Yes, yes.

No!

(lightsaber buzzes)

(Sheila sobs fearfully)

(ominous chanting)

(wolf howls)

There's something going on here that we don't know about.

Brilliantly lucid, Lukas.

Do let's go back. - No, no, no, no.

I've got to go through here.

I don't like it one little bit.

Don't panic, just follow me.

Look out! Oh! A bat!

(Lukas grunts) (bat thuds)

A cricket bat?

Look!

Suddenly, all the pieces are falling into place.

(door creaks)

This is obviously an opening bat.

I hope it doesn't lead us to a sticky wicket!

Look!

What's that?

I'm not sure.

Oh my God.

Here, give me a hand.

You're not going to open it!

Well, of course I'm gonna open it.

(stone grinds)

I think we've found what we're looking for.

[Barbra] Somehow, I wish we hadn't.

Let's get started.

(eerie music)

Have you found anything yet?

[Barbra] Nothing so far.

No?

This looks fairly interesting.

Hang on, this is it.

Listen, "Headstone Manor was built

on the site of a burial ground

of an ancient order of monks

who once ruled the area by terror and torture."

Interesting.

"Folklore has it that the monks

regularly returned to the site

to perform pagan ceremonies.

When Headstone Manor was built,

many workers died mysteriously

and stories were rife of monks who appeared in the night

and took on the form of any inhabitants of the manor

who met with violent deaths."

Remarkable.

"Some say the monks are extraterrestrial visitors

from an alien planet,

emissaries of Lucifer, the prince of darkness,

who used the manor as an instrument

for their evil powers on Earth."

Local, local people have,"

its so dark in here.

"Local people had the emblem of the monk's order

tattooed on their bodies to signify their submission."

Ah, that's better.

"But the true monks had the emblem

burned on the palms of their hands.

Legend has it that the manor must always remain empty

for its evil powers to function on Earth,

and the monks will always reappear

to cleanse it of any intruders."

- Well! - Hmm!

On the other hand, of course,

it may not all be quite so simple.

But I recommend we just pack up and go home.

(creature growls) (Barbra screams)

It's you! Lukas, look!

(Barbra screams)

(Barbra breathes heavily)

(Barbra screams)

(Barbra whimpers, shouts)

Please, not now!

I don't want to die doing this.

On the other hand,

we could go back to your place.

How the hell did he do that?

(swooning music)

I don't know what she sees in him.

(ominous chanting)

Our house has been cleansed.

We must return!

(latch hums, hisses)

(ship whirs)

(hurried breathing) - [Abandoned Alien] Oh, no!

(ship whirs)

[Abandoned Alien] Oh, shit! Not again!

(lightning strikes)

(eerie music)