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1
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:47,500
Damn!
2
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:59,262
Blast the hatch! Now!
3
00:03:00,389 --> 00:03:03,140
That experiment must not
get off this ship!
4
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:57,486
Oh, hi.
5
00:03:57,654 --> 00:03:59,238
Bye.
6
00:04:04,369 --> 00:04:08,331
Oh, I gotta pass this test.
I gotta get an A.
7
00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,523
We interrupt this program
for a KING news flash.
8
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,944
Authorities at the Crestridge Institute
for the criminally insane...
9
00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:40,655
...have requested
an all-points bullet--
10
00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:53,334
He's so dreamy.
11
00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:56,045
Oh, he's just the most.
12
00:04:56,213 --> 00:04:57,672
Who?
13
00:04:57,839 --> 00:04:58,881
Ray?
14
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:01,092
They broke up.
15
00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:05,388
Oh, come on, Muffy.
The guy's a cop. He has no future.
16
00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:09,225
I mean,
wake up and smell the coffee, Muffy.
17
00:05:09,393 --> 00:05:10,393
What?
18
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:13,229
Well, Pam told me, who else?
19
00:05:13,397 --> 00:05:18,150
Sure, she's right here next to me.
We are roommates, you know.
20
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:21,153
What? Where?
21
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,991
No, that was Friday night.
22
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:28,577
You're such a gomer sometimes.
23
00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:31,497
Did you see
Plan 9 from Outer Space?
24
00:05:50,392 --> 00:05:56,522
Star light, star bright, first star I....
25
00:05:57,190 --> 00:06:00,526
Say,
which one is the brightest star?
26
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:03,112
Hey, haven't you kids
heard the radio?
27
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:05,656
There's some nutbar on the loose,
so I sugg--
28
00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:08,451
Pam?
29
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:11,412
Hello, Ray.
30
00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:18,002
Just go home, will you?
31
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:19,211
Just go home.
32
00:06:24,301 --> 00:06:26,552
You know that cop?
33
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:30,848
He's just someone from my past.
34
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,895
What about the brightest star,
anyway?
35
00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:58,084
Neato!
36
00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,627
I vote for that one.
37
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:15,935
Are you sure this is a good idea?
38
00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:18,104
Come on, cool out, will you?
39
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,397
I'm telling you,
it went down right over there.
40
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:24,610
Oh, no, Johnny.
This place gives me the creeps.
41
00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:48,384
Johnny?
42
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,511
You stay here.
43
00:07:53,098 --> 00:07:54,640
You're kidding, right?
44
00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:17,663
Another update
from the KING newsroom.
45
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:21,000
Police continue the search
for a 35-year-old escapee...
46
00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:24,670
...from the Crestridge Mental Institute,
who, officials confirm...
47
00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:28,215
...killed four orderlies
in a brutal spree early tonight.
48
00:08:28,383 --> 00:08:31,677
Crestridge police warn the man
is armed with a large fire ax...
49
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:34,471
...and is believed to be moving west
on Route 66...
50
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:36,599
...toward
the Corman University area.
51
00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,113
Johnny?
52
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:13,844
Johnny.
53
00:09:14,012 --> 00:09:16,972
Can we go back to the point now?
54
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:21,936
I'll even let you fondle my breasts.
55
00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,960
Johnny.
56
00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:49,505
I'm getting lonely out here
by myself.
57
00:09:59,307 --> 00:10:01,225
Johnny.
58
00:10:10,694 --> 00:10:12,653
Johnny.
59
00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:38,554
I'm depressed.
60
00:10:38,722 --> 00:10:39,722
Oh, will you cheer up?
61
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:41,682
Come on, this is college life.
62
00:10:41,850 --> 00:10:44,643
You know, toilet paper in the trees,
spring is in the air...
63
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:48,105
...a couple of bitchen guys
on the prowl for major league babes.
64
00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:51,358
Face it, J.C., we're dorks.
We're lameoids.
65
00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:54,153
My grandparents have sex
more than we do.
66
00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:57,990
Well, granted, but you talk
like that's a negative thing.
67
00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:00,326
Good point. I feel a lot better.
68
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:02,161
Good, so do I.
69
00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:03,620
J.C., do me a favor.
70
00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,706
Anything, dude.
You got it, you know it.
71
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:07,666
Don't try and cheer me up.
72
00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:10,419
Look, Chris, when you're depressed,
I'm depressed.
73
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:13,130
And I don't like being depressed.
It's, well, you know--
74
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:14,715
- Depressing?
- Depressing, yeah.
75
00:11:14,883 --> 00:11:18,761
So do me a favor, okay, bud?
Cut out this being depressed shit.
76
00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:21,555
Chris, this is me talking here.
I'm your bud. I love you.
77
00:11:21,723 --> 00:11:24,933
We have a bond, a warmth,
a communication.
78
00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,120
Who's that?
79
00:11:46,915 --> 00:11:49,041
- Who's what?
- Her. The vision.
80
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,502
- The angel, the goddess.
- The one with the hogans?
81
00:11:51,669 --> 00:11:53,045
Yeah, who is she?
82
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,506
I think that's the Morton Salt girl.
83
00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:56,965
How the hell should I know?
84
00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,385
Hey, you, honey. Toots, yo.
85
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:01,970
Yeah, what's your name?
86
00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:05,307
J.C., remind me
to kill you sometime.
87
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:06,809
Kill me sometime, huh?
88
00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:10,270
Great.
89
00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:12,314
Now what do I do?
90
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:16,819
Well, you could always just stand here
like an idiot and not do anything.
91
00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:19,113
Kidding, joke, levity, humor.
92
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,989
Shit.
She's going in the Beta house.
93
00:12:21,157 --> 00:12:22,324
Oh, that bitch.
94
00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:24,076
I hate the Betas.
95
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,036
Look, do you wanna meet her
or what?
96
00:12:26,204 --> 00:12:27,746
I wanna marry her.
97
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:29,706
I hate to break this to you, bud.
98
00:12:29,874 --> 00:12:32,626
It's gonna be quite a blow,
but you have to meet her first.
99
00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:36,171
I know it's a hassle, but hey,
I don't make up the rules, pal.
100
00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:18,046
Bingo.
101
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:19,631
- Where?
- One o'clock.
102
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:29,933
Great. She's with a guy.
103
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:34,188
Yeah, but look at him.
I mean, the guy's a bozo.
104
00:13:34,355 --> 00:13:35,939
He's the missing link.
105
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:38,692
Chris, the man
has one continuous eyebrow.
106
00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:40,569
Yeah, well, he's also got her.
107
00:13:40,737 --> 00:13:42,029
It's all positive thinking.
108
00:13:42,197 --> 00:13:44,740
Now, watch this.
J.C.'s going in for the main event.
109
00:13:44,908 --> 00:13:46,825
Final countdown, third and 10.
110
00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:50,329
This is gonna be beautiful.
You'll love this.
111
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:55,334
So are you gonna come to the game
with me sometime?
112
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:56,793
- Maybe.
- Sure, it'd be great.
113
00:13:56,961 --> 00:13:59,421
Sit on the bench
and watch them play, it'd be great.
114
00:13:59,589 --> 00:14:00,756
Love to have you there.
115
00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:02,216
Sounds like fun.
116
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:03,800
Yeah.
117
00:14:04,135 --> 00:14:05,552
Tiger.
118
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:09,264
Excuse me, what's his name?
119
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:12,851
Steve.
120
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:15,604
Steve, bud, how's it going?
121
00:14:15,772 --> 00:14:18,273
I think there
was a telephone call for you inside.
122
00:14:19,901 --> 00:14:21,693
Thanks, dude.
123
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:22,945
Later, Cindy.
124
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,531
- Bye.
- No problem.
125
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:30,244
Cindy. Cindy what?
126
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:34,081
There isn't really a phone call for him,
is there?
127
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:38,293
Cynthia, my time is limited.
128
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:40,837
Much like the intellect of Steve.
129
00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:43,215
You see
that attractive gentleman over there...
130
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:45,467
...by the ale dispenser?
131
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:51,723
Well, I'm his agent, and it is vital
that I obtain this information.
132
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:55,811
You see, the fate of the entire
free world hangs in the balance.
133
00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:58,981
Cynthia Cronenberg.
134
00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:02,484
- And why didn't he ask me himself?
- Tell him that.
135
00:15:04,279 --> 00:15:08,657
- I would.
- But you have a boyfriend?
136
00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:13,829
Hey, you're cruising, man.
137
00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:15,872
There was no call for me.
138
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,625
Silly me, I don't understand
how that could've happened.
139
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:20,377
What was your name again? Chad?
140
00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:22,546
Biff? Riff?
141
00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:25,549
Steve.
And I don't think you're very funny.
142
00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:27,634
Don't tell me.
143
00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:30,470
About as funny as a crutch?
144
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,347
Get it?
145
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:46,194
Give me.
Talk, squeal, spill the beans.
146
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,196
Chill out. All right.
147
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:50,490
Okay, she knows her name
for starters.
148
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,784
Which for a sorority girl
is pretty impressive.
149
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:53,994
Cut to the chase.
150
00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:55,621
Does she have a boyfriend?
151
00:15:56,831 --> 00:15:59,916
She didn't say, but I don't think so.
152
00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:02,294
This is it.
153
00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:03,962
I think--
154
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,173
I think
I can possibly be in love here.
155
00:16:06,341 --> 00:16:10,719
You realize there's one way this girl
is ever gonna take you seriously.
156
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:12,679
Right.
157
00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:14,222
If I belong to a frat.
158
00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:15,766
Preferably this one.
159
00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:19,269
I was thinking more
along the lines of talking to her.
160
00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:22,564
J.C.
161
00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:26,777
Bud, you're so naive.
162
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:28,403
Yeah.
163
00:16:33,868 --> 00:16:36,161
Now, let me get this straight.
164
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:40,916
You guys wanna pledge the Betas?
165
00:16:41,918 --> 00:16:43,835
That's right.
166
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,464
Well, now...
167
00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:52,135
...what makes you guys think
you're Beta material?
168
00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:58,100
I mean, we've pretty much found...
169
00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:01,103
...most of the guys we need
to fill the roster this semester.
170
00:17:01,270 --> 00:17:05,107
You'd have
to have something special to offer.
171
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:08,985
How about money? Moolah, dough.
172
00:17:09,153 --> 00:17:11,279
The old green stuff, fun ticket.
173
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,031
Cabbage, the old dollar sign.
174
00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:14,366
Come on, killer-roo.
175
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:16,493
I'm talking about the dinars,
yens, rupee--
176
00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:17,703
Quiet already.
177
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:19,830
Gentlemen...
178
00:17:20,623 --> 00:17:24,668
...the brothers and I
can't make any promises at this point.
179
00:17:24,836 --> 00:17:27,254
But I do have a proposal.
180
00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:34,469
If you guys were willing to perform...
181
00:17:34,637 --> 00:17:38,598
...a little act of devotion...
182
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:44,813
...some task that would prove
the sincerity of your feelings...
183
00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:47,065
...toward this organization.
184
00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:50,986
We don't have to have sex
with a farm animal, do we?
185
00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:57,909
Interesting suggestion, but no.
186
00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:02,164
We had something...
187
00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:05,584
...a little more challenging in mind.
188
00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:11,173
Look, at least we don't have
to have sex with a farm animal.
189
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:14,009
Hey, you might like it.
You wouldn't want Cynthia anymore.
190
00:18:14,177 --> 00:18:16,678
- That's not funny.
- Really, I'm serious.
191
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:17,888
Shut up.
192
00:18:18,848 --> 00:18:21,641
Brother Brad,
if these guys pull this off...
193
00:18:21,809 --> 00:18:23,769
...are we really gonna let them in?
194
00:18:24,854 --> 00:18:26,855
Get serious.
195
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,618
Babe, where you been?
196
00:18:40,203 --> 00:18:43,246
Oh, rush stuff.
197
00:19:11,234 --> 00:19:13,068
Goddamn it.
198
00:19:23,454 --> 00:19:25,580
Great, I know that number.
199
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:28,708
Rudy. Hi, how you doing?
200
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:34,256
Listen, I can't remember that last digit
to the stupid security card.
201
00:19:34,423 --> 00:19:36,842
Well, you need the digit
to get in the door.
202
00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:40,720
Rudy, just, could you look for it?
I think it's in my notebook.
203
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,097
Yeah.
204
00:19:42,265 --> 00:19:44,808
Yeah, on the desk, yeah. I'll wait.
205
00:19:44,976 --> 00:19:46,893
Appreciate it, Rudy.
206
00:19:54,402 --> 00:19:56,194
Why can't they just have a sign?
207
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:57,946
Oh, a sign? That's good.
208
00:19:58,114 --> 00:19:59,489
What do you want it to say?
209
00:19:59,657 --> 00:20:02,450
"Corpses for use
in wacky fraternity pranks"?
210
00:20:02,618 --> 00:20:03,952
Morgue or something.
211
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,706
Morgue? You're pretty clever.
A little arrow or something?
212
00:20:12,295 --> 00:20:15,005
Come on.
It's gotta be around here some--
213
00:20:15,172 --> 00:20:17,007
What the hell are you doing?
214
00:20:19,594 --> 00:20:20,844
What the hell did you do?
215
00:20:21,596 --> 00:20:24,306
I don't know. Come on.
216
00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:26,558
You're kidding, right?
217
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,059
All right.
218
00:20:28,227 --> 00:20:30,186
No, not the blue notebook.
219
00:20:30,354 --> 00:20:31,396
The red one.
220
00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:33,815
This gives me the creeps.
221
00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:35,817
Hey, how about looking
for the lights?
222
00:20:35,985 --> 00:20:38,445
How can I look for the lights?
I can't see anything.
223
00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:39,988
Well, use your hands.
224
00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:42,198
Hey, better yet,
use your whale radar.
225
00:20:42,366 --> 00:20:45,118
You are so weird.
226
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:48,955
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
227
00:20:49,123 --> 00:20:51,708
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
228
00:21:00,468 --> 00:21:02,719
Think it's taking
the Lord's name in vain to say:
229
00:21:02,887 --> 00:21:06,389
"Oh, my God" a whole bunch
of times really fast like that?
230
00:21:06,557 --> 00:21:07,849
I believe you're allowed...
231
00:21:08,017 --> 00:21:10,810
...to break the commandments
in certain situations.
232
00:21:10,978 --> 00:21:13,104
How about getting the shit
scared out of you...
233
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:16,942
...by a creepy, scary dead guy
in a refrigerated coffin?
234
00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:18,902
Are you sure he's dead?
235
00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:20,153
Well, I mean...
236
00:21:20,321 --> 00:21:24,658
...I'm pretty sure we could safely say
he's not well, Chris.
237
00:21:25,117 --> 00:21:26,743
- I wonder who he is.
- Walt Disney.
238
00:21:26,911 --> 00:21:29,245
How the hell should I know?
Let's get out of here.
239
00:21:29,413 --> 00:21:30,830
How long has he been here?
240
00:21:30,998 --> 00:21:34,459
What am I, a tour guide?
The guy's sealed up. Let's go.
241
00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:36,878
Wait a minute.
242
00:21:37,338 --> 00:21:39,881
For what? The cops?
243
00:21:40,174 --> 00:21:42,509
J.C., our stupid mission
is to find a cadaver...
244
00:21:42,677 --> 00:21:44,886
...and dump it on the front
of the P.O.G. house.
245
00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:47,180
This guy's obviously
part of some experiment...
246
00:21:47,348 --> 00:21:48,765
...so let's get out of here.
247
00:21:48,933 --> 00:21:53,103
I don't see any other handy
takeout corpses around here, do you?
248
00:21:55,398 --> 00:21:56,731
Wait a second.
249
00:21:56,899 --> 00:21:59,275
"Cryogenic stasis system."
250
00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:01,695
Will you come on?
251
00:22:06,075 --> 00:22:07,617
You really didn't do that.
252
00:22:07,785 --> 00:22:09,911
Cryogenics?
253
00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:11,079
Cryogenics?
254
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:13,415
Chris, do you realize what this is?
255
00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:15,417
You heard of freeze-dried coffee,
right?
256
00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:18,545
Well, this is like a freeze-dried human.
A corpsicle.
257
00:22:19,213 --> 00:22:21,673
- You mean like suspended animation?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
258
00:22:21,841 --> 00:22:24,926
It's like you take someone while
they're alive and you freeze them.
259
00:22:25,094 --> 00:22:28,013
Then you thaw them out
a hundred years later like a TV dinner.
260
00:22:28,180 --> 00:22:31,599
We are talking
total science-fiction here.
261
00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:35,687
Disengage.
262
00:22:36,981 --> 00:22:38,023
No, wait.
263
00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:39,607
That's it, yes, bingo.
264
00:22:39,775 --> 00:22:41,693
I love you, Rudy. Thank you.
265
00:23:09,638 --> 00:23:11,389
- Is he heavy?
- Yeah.
266
00:23:11,557 --> 00:23:13,308
Is he cold?
267
00:23:19,106 --> 00:23:21,775
Think you'll be able to carry him
all the way back?
268
00:23:28,991 --> 00:23:30,492
Hey!
269
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,149
Oh, my God.
270
00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:23,711
Great.
271
00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:26,381
Now what?
272
00:24:26,757 --> 00:24:30,009
Okay. How about we get
a couple of machine guns, right?
273
00:24:30,177 --> 00:24:32,262
And we blow the windows
out of the joint.
274
00:24:32,429 --> 00:24:35,890
And we yell, "Come on in and get me,
you dirty coppers."
275
00:24:36,058 --> 00:24:39,144
I mean,
everything's a joke to you tonight.
276
00:24:39,562 --> 00:24:41,896
Hey, fuck you, Chris.
277
00:24:42,857 --> 00:24:44,524
Look, every single day...
278
00:24:44,692 --> 00:24:47,152
...I put up with your moaning
about what's-her-name...
279
00:24:47,319 --> 00:24:49,279
...and how you wish
you could fall in love.
280
00:24:49,446 --> 00:24:51,865
But you're too chickenshit
to do anything about it.
281
00:24:52,032 --> 00:24:53,908
And then
this Cynthia girl comes along.
282
00:24:54,076 --> 00:24:56,494
Dream girl, 2001.
283
00:24:56,662 --> 00:25:00,081
I say to myself, "What the hell,
I'm sure as hell never gonna get laid...
284
00:25:00,249 --> 00:25:02,417
...so I might as well
help out my best friend."
285
00:25:02,585 --> 00:25:04,419
And then you say, "J.C., help.
286
00:25:04,587 --> 00:25:07,547
We gotta join the fraternity
so she'll give me the time of day."
287
00:25:07,715 --> 00:25:09,883
And I say,
"What the hell, you gotta do it."
288
00:25:10,050 --> 00:25:11,092
And what do I do?
289
00:25:11,260 --> 00:25:14,679
I bust my ass to help you
and you get chickenshit again.
290
00:25:14,847 --> 00:25:16,931
And I push and I push
and I don't give up.
291
00:25:17,099 --> 00:25:18,141
And why? Why?
292
00:25:18,309 --> 00:25:20,185
You don't even know.
You don't even care.
293
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:23,354
Because it's important to me
that you're happy, is that so crazy?
294
00:25:23,522 --> 00:25:26,900
And we gotta act like jerks
and get in trouble in order to do that.
295
00:25:27,067 --> 00:25:29,652
It's better than acting like jerks
for no reason, right?
296
00:25:29,820 --> 00:25:31,279
So yeah, everything is a joke.
297
00:25:31,447 --> 00:25:34,449
It's hilarious,
because if you take it seriously...
298
00:25:34,617 --> 00:25:38,995
...you just get depressed
all the time like you are. So fuck you.
299
00:25:43,292 --> 00:25:46,044
- Yeah, well, fuck you too.
- You try it.
300
00:25:46,212 --> 00:25:47,879
- If you'd let me.
- You'd want me to.
301
00:25:48,297 --> 00:25:51,257
- You wish.
- Are we done?
302
00:25:52,426 --> 00:25:54,427
I'm sorry I was an asshole.
303
00:25:57,681 --> 00:26:00,350
If you weren't such an asshole,
even girls might like you.
304
00:26:02,645 --> 00:26:04,854
Hey, throw me that pillow, will you?
305
00:27:14,758 --> 00:27:16,426
Freeze!
306
00:27:35,988 --> 00:27:37,405
Thrill me.
307
00:27:37,573 --> 00:27:38,656
Detective Cameron?
308
00:27:38,824 --> 00:27:40,908
No, Bozo the Clown.
309
00:27:42,202 --> 00:27:45,496
We had a call
from University Med Center.
310
00:27:45,664 --> 00:27:47,915
Some experimental lab
has been broken into.
311
00:28:07,728 --> 00:28:09,604
Detective Cameron?
312
00:28:10,147 --> 00:28:11,564
No.
313
00:28:11,732 --> 00:28:15,610
Bullwinkle Moose. Thrill me.
314
00:28:15,778 --> 00:28:17,278
Hey, Ray.
315
00:28:18,655 --> 00:28:21,991
You're looking
at your actual cryogenics lab.
316
00:28:22,159 --> 00:28:26,162
They've had some kid's body
on ice here since 1959.
317
00:28:27,164 --> 00:28:30,583
What is this,
a homicide or a bad B movie?
318
00:28:31,460 --> 00:28:32,460
What's that?
319
00:28:32,628 --> 00:28:34,003
Was a grad student.
320
00:28:34,171 --> 00:28:35,880
Lab technician.
321
00:28:36,048 --> 00:28:38,257
He was scheduled to work here
this evening.
322
00:28:38,425 --> 00:28:40,968
Looks like he worked
a little too hard, huh?
323
00:28:41,136 --> 00:28:44,430
I suppose Rip Van Winkle
will be the other body. Where is it?
324
00:28:44,598 --> 00:28:47,225
The other body isn't here, sir.
325
00:28:49,103 --> 00:28:51,771
What, did he have a date?
What do you mean it isn't here?
326
00:28:51,939 --> 00:28:53,981
The coroner-- Jake, did you take it?
327
00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:56,025
I just got here.
328
00:28:56,193 --> 00:28:58,319
I'm confused.
I was told there were two bodies.
329
00:28:58,487 --> 00:29:00,655
- Raimi.
- Yes, sir?
330
00:29:00,823 --> 00:29:03,658
First, knock off the "yes, sir" shit.
331
00:29:03,992 --> 00:29:06,661
Second, since when does
a desk sergeant show up on a call?
332
00:29:06,829 --> 00:29:08,704
Third,
you told me there were two bodies.
333
00:29:08,872 --> 00:29:11,541
Now, I only see the one.
You do know the difference?
334
00:29:11,708 --> 00:29:13,793
It wasn't on the sergeant exam
or anything...
335
00:29:13,961 --> 00:29:16,087
...but if you use your fingers,
it's real easy.
336
00:29:16,255 --> 00:29:19,132
See? One, two.
337
00:29:19,299 --> 00:29:20,800
- Piece of cake.
- Yes, sir.
338
00:29:20,968 --> 00:29:24,679
Well, there were two bodies, but there
was a dispatch problem, you know.
339
00:29:24,847 --> 00:29:25,847
Where were you guys?
340
00:29:26,014 --> 00:29:28,933
Well, sir,
there was a dispatch problem, sir.
341
00:29:29,101 --> 00:29:30,184
A dispatch problem.
342
00:29:30,352 --> 00:29:33,646
Anyway, look, I came down
and met the night janitor.
343
00:29:33,814 --> 00:29:36,232
And got a statement, of course.
344
00:29:39,361 --> 00:29:41,112
This shit is getting old real fast.
345
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:44,198
I was awakened out of a real
pleasant dream to come down here.
346
00:29:44,366 --> 00:29:47,869
Straighten it out or am I gonna play
poo patrol with your night stick?
347
00:29:48,036 --> 00:29:49,078
I screwed up.
348
00:29:49,246 --> 00:29:51,998
I sent two rookies down here
on a case like this...
349
00:29:52,166 --> 00:29:55,918
...and at some point,
they both went to the....
350
00:29:56,503 --> 00:29:58,629
- They went to the bathroom.
- That's fine, fine.
351
00:29:58,797 --> 00:30:02,216
Candy-assed, but fine.
There's just one minor problem.
352
00:30:02,384 --> 00:30:04,802
Corpses that have been dead
for 27 years...
353
00:30:04,970 --> 00:30:07,847
...do not get up
and go for a walk by themselves!
354
00:30:20,527 --> 00:30:23,237
Sorry we had to make it
an early night, babe...
355
00:30:23,405 --> 00:30:27,283
...but we've got some serious
pledge humiliation to deal with.
356
00:31:06,114 --> 00:31:07,114
Prez?
357
00:31:07,282 --> 00:31:10,826
Lori told me to ask you if I can store
these in the house till Monday. Okay?
358
00:31:10,994 --> 00:31:12,161
Well, what are they?
359
00:31:13,121 --> 00:31:16,832
Well, they're kind of brains
for our bio class.
360
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:18,125
We have to dissect them.
361
00:31:18,293 --> 00:31:20,628
Wait, human brains?
362
00:31:20,796 --> 00:31:21,921
How about the basement?
363
00:31:22,673 --> 00:31:24,131
Sure.
364
00:31:24,299 --> 00:31:26,926
I just don't want them up here.
365
00:33:02,731 --> 00:33:04,565
Hi, Gordon. Hi, sweetie.
366
00:33:04,733 --> 00:33:07,276
Did you come to help me study
or what, huh?
367
00:33:07,444 --> 00:33:09,195
Where have you been, huh?
368
00:34:54,885 --> 00:34:57,511
- Let's go, let's go.
- Go back. Come along, men.
369
00:35:27,751 --> 00:35:29,543
Caucasian.
370
00:35:30,128 --> 00:35:32,505
Unusual pallor to the complexion...
371
00:35:32,672 --> 00:35:34,548
...what's left of it.
372
00:35:37,219 --> 00:35:38,886
This that body
you were looking for?
373
00:35:39,596 --> 00:35:41,096
Thrill me.
374
00:35:48,104 --> 00:35:50,815
Jesus Christ.
375
00:36:03,912 --> 00:36:05,955
What's this supposed to be?
376
00:36:06,665 --> 00:36:09,542
It's supposed to be
the housemother's cottage.
377
00:36:38,572 --> 00:36:41,615
What you thinking, Ray?
Knock it off.
378
00:36:44,703 --> 00:36:46,912
Did that look to you like it...?
379
00:36:47,414 --> 00:36:49,957
Like it could've been done
with an ax?
380
00:36:50,125 --> 00:36:52,126
I said stop it.
381
00:36:53,253 --> 00:36:57,923
That psycho disappeared
27 years ago and you know it.
382
00:36:58,425 --> 00:37:02,678
Do you get off on living in the past?
383
00:37:06,808 --> 00:37:09,518
- Get him up. Yeah, all right.
- Are you ready?
384
00:37:09,686 --> 00:37:10,728
Watch it.
385
00:37:10,896 --> 00:37:14,148
Now, stay back, girls.
You don't wanna see this.
386
00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:28,662
Oh, right.
387
00:37:28,830 --> 00:37:30,497
She was. She was blond.
388
00:37:30,665 --> 00:37:33,208
She had on a blue sweater.
You didn't see her?
389
00:37:33,376 --> 00:37:34,627
- Are you serious?
- Yes.
390
00:37:34,794 --> 00:37:36,211
She was checking.
391
00:37:49,351 --> 00:37:52,144
That was not too cool, bros.
392
00:37:53,521 --> 00:37:56,398
- Hi, Brad.
- Okay, so we put you up to it.
393
00:37:56,566 --> 00:37:59,193
But we said
the Phi Omega Gamma house...
394
00:37:59,361 --> 00:38:00,819
...not the Kappa Delta sorority.
395
00:38:00,987 --> 00:38:03,197
Do you know the difference?
396
00:38:03,949 --> 00:38:05,532
It's all Greek to me.
397
00:38:08,203 --> 00:38:10,120
That was a little joke. I was kidding.
398
00:38:10,288 --> 00:38:13,415
A lot of girls were seriously freaked out
last night because of you.
399
00:38:13,917 --> 00:38:17,503
Wait a second, okay?
Listen, Brother Bratskeller.
400
00:38:17,671 --> 00:38:21,340
A, that whole stunt
was your Nobel Prize-winning idea...
401
00:38:21,508 --> 00:38:23,258
...and B, we didn't even pull it off.
402
00:38:23,426 --> 00:38:25,177
We chickened out, okay?
403
00:38:25,345 --> 00:38:29,556
So why don't you just get off our case
and go practice goose-stepping?
404
00:38:32,686 --> 00:38:33,936
Brad, stop.
405
00:38:37,732 --> 00:38:39,608
What a jerk.
406
00:38:42,737 --> 00:38:44,655
Sorry, dorks.
407
00:38:44,823 --> 00:38:46,907
Don't take it personal.
408
00:38:48,952 --> 00:38:50,536
Coming, babe?
409
00:39:10,640 --> 00:39:12,266
I got it.
410
00:39:13,768 --> 00:39:15,686
I'm really sorry.
411
00:39:16,604 --> 00:39:17,771
It's not your fault.
412
00:39:18,148 --> 00:39:20,733
We didn't do it. We really didn't.
413
00:39:20,900 --> 00:39:22,943
I believe you.
414
00:39:24,696 --> 00:39:27,406
For the record,
this is Cynthia Cronenberg.
415
00:39:28,992 --> 00:39:30,034
And we're--
416
00:39:30,201 --> 00:39:32,578
Christopher Romero
and James Carpenter Hooper?
417
00:39:34,330 --> 00:39:36,790
Landis, Homicide.
418
00:39:39,127 --> 00:39:41,086
Well, well, well.
419
00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:44,048
If it isn't Spanky and Alfalfa.
420
00:39:44,215 --> 00:39:46,216
Either of you guys
recognize Mr. Miner here?
421
00:39:48,053 --> 00:39:50,512
Well, he recognizes you.
422
00:39:51,056 --> 00:39:53,182
It seems Mr. Miner here
is the night janitor...
423
00:39:53,349 --> 00:39:54,850
...at the University Med Center.
424
00:39:55,810 --> 00:39:58,395
He says he saw you guys
running out of there last night.
425
00:39:58,563 --> 00:40:00,647
Forty miles an hour.
426
00:40:00,815 --> 00:40:03,233
Screaming like banshees.
427
00:40:03,401 --> 00:40:04,818
Care to comment?
428
00:40:09,783 --> 00:40:11,533
Okay.
429
00:40:11,993 --> 00:40:14,161
Seems we also found
a headless body...
430
00:40:14,329 --> 00:40:16,705
...out in front
of the Kappa Delta house last night.
431
00:40:19,459 --> 00:40:22,836
A body that came
from a lab in the basement...
432
00:40:23,004 --> 00:40:25,214
...of the very medical center...
433
00:40:25,381 --> 00:40:28,383
...that Mr. Miner saw you
running out of at 40 miles an hour.
434
00:40:29,010 --> 00:40:30,886
Don't forget
screaming like banshees.
435
00:40:32,097 --> 00:40:34,515
Sounds like a pledge prank to me.
436
00:40:34,682 --> 00:40:38,102
A sick, twisted, psychotic,
demented, deranged pledge prank.
437
00:40:38,269 --> 00:40:40,395
But possibly,
just possibly in the ball park...
438
00:40:40,563 --> 00:40:43,524
...of what you might call
your collegiate tomfoolery.
439
00:40:43,691 --> 00:40:45,067
You guys care to comment?
440
00:40:45,819 --> 00:40:47,486
- Well--
- Captain.
441
00:40:48,029 --> 00:40:52,199
Detective, I mean,
we're not your fraternity types.
442
00:40:52,367 --> 00:40:54,368
I personally
would rather have my brains...
443
00:40:54,536 --> 00:40:57,538
...invaded by creatures from space
than pledge a fraternity.
444
00:40:57,705 --> 00:40:59,998
He's lying. We did it.
445
00:41:01,709 --> 00:41:04,461
- Well, the Betas--
- The Betas.
446
00:41:04,629 --> 00:41:06,547
The Betas.
Well, that explains everything.
447
00:41:06,714 --> 00:41:08,841
The Betas told us to find a body...
448
00:41:09,008 --> 00:41:11,260
...and dump it on the steps
of another fraternity.
449
00:41:11,427 --> 00:41:17,307
Well, we got into the lab
and we got the body out of this thing.
450
00:41:17,725 --> 00:41:19,893
And then we chickened out
and ran away.
451
00:41:20,061 --> 00:41:21,645
At 40 miles an hour.
452
00:41:21,813 --> 00:41:24,189
Screaming like banshees.
453
00:41:26,484 --> 00:41:28,235
It was a nervous response.
454
00:41:28,403 --> 00:41:30,571
- He means the body.
- The body?
455
00:41:30,738 --> 00:41:33,574
It twitched. Its eyes opened.
456
00:41:33,741 --> 00:41:36,702
- I don't know, it spazzed out.
- Spazzed out. Totally.
457
00:41:36,870 --> 00:41:40,372
But I swear to God,
we did not move it from that lab.
458
00:41:40,540 --> 00:41:41,915
And we sure the hell...
459
00:41:42,083 --> 00:41:45,043
...I mean, heck,
didn't damage it in any way.
460
00:41:45,211 --> 00:41:49,256
And even if we did, Mr. Miner here
would've seen us, wouldn't he?
461
00:41:50,216 --> 00:41:53,218
Screaming like banshees.
462
00:42:36,638 --> 00:42:37,971
Yeah, see you tomorrow.
463
00:42:51,819 --> 00:42:54,988
Screaming like banshees.
464
00:43:30,984 --> 00:43:32,025
Kappa Delta.
465
00:43:32,193 --> 00:43:33,944
Is Cindy Cronenberg there?
466
00:43:34,112 --> 00:43:35,445
Just a minute.
467
00:43:35,613 --> 00:43:37,656
Cindy!
468
00:43:38,533 --> 00:43:40,075
Karen?
469
00:43:42,036 --> 00:43:43,912
Has anybody told her about the cat?
470
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:45,414
It'd break her heart.
471
00:43:45,581 --> 00:43:47,207
- Hi.
- Hi.
472
00:43:48,710 --> 00:43:50,794
Thanks, cutie.
473
00:43:53,381 --> 00:43:55,007
Hello?
474
00:43:55,883 --> 00:43:58,010
Hey, babe. It's the Bradster.
475
00:43:58,469 --> 00:44:00,637
- Listen, about--
- Brad...
476
00:44:02,056 --> 00:44:04,224
...I don't think
I wanna talk to you right now.
477
00:44:04,392 --> 00:44:07,352
Hey, hey, lighten up.
478
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:09,521
It's about those chuckle-heads,
isn't it?
479
00:44:14,235 --> 00:44:17,571
I mean, it'd be one thing
if you planned to pledge them.
480
00:44:17,739 --> 00:44:19,781
Have a cow about it,
why don't you?
481
00:44:20,158 --> 00:44:22,075
If I knew you were
gonna pull a downer...
482
00:44:22,243 --> 00:44:24,077
...I never even would've told you.
483
00:44:24,245 --> 00:44:27,998
But that's what I get for going
with a fucking psych major, isn't it?
484
00:44:48,853 --> 00:44:50,354
Gordon.
485
00:44:56,778 --> 00:44:59,321
Hi, sweetie. Hi, Gordon.
486
00:45:42,990 --> 00:45:44,533
Thrill me.
487
00:45:49,997 --> 00:45:51,873
Wonderful.
488
00:45:52,500 --> 00:45:54,126
How do you want me
to write this up?
489
00:45:54,293 --> 00:45:56,044
As just a homicide?
490
00:46:25,199 --> 00:46:26,741
Hi.
491
00:46:27,660 --> 00:46:28,869
Hi, hi.
492
00:46:29,495 --> 00:46:33,832
I looked you guys up in the student
directory. I hope you don't mind.
493
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:37,210
Oh, not at all,
because we were just doing--
494
00:46:37,378 --> 00:46:40,130
I was about to take a shower
and then just....
495
00:46:41,382 --> 00:46:43,592
How's it going?
Wanna come in or just...?
496
00:46:44,051 --> 00:46:47,471
Actually, would a walk
be out of the question?
497
00:46:53,811 --> 00:46:56,146
I know they buried him.
498
00:46:56,481 --> 00:46:58,148
I saw the grave myself.
499
00:46:58,316 --> 00:47:03,320
This is excellent.
Night of the Living Dead Cat.
500
00:47:04,906 --> 00:47:08,074
Look, maybe the girl was on drugs.
501
00:47:08,242 --> 00:47:11,244
You know,
studying can get to you after a while.
502
00:47:13,581 --> 00:47:17,459
Sounds like there's a dance tonight,
the Student Union.
503
00:47:18,127 --> 00:47:20,170
And that guy's body?
504
00:47:20,338 --> 00:47:22,422
The one from the lab?
505
00:47:22,590 --> 00:47:25,592
It came to my window, you guys.
506
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:27,886
I swear to God.
507
00:47:32,266 --> 00:47:34,851
I thought you'd understand.
508
00:47:35,603 --> 00:47:41,441
I mean, I didn't know who else
to come and talk to about it.
509
00:47:42,652 --> 00:47:46,571
I do understand. We do understand.
510
00:47:47,532 --> 00:47:49,824
I'm so confused.
511
00:47:56,040 --> 00:47:57,082
Listen, you guys.
512
00:47:57,250 --> 00:47:59,334
I really have to use
the nearest facilities...
513
00:47:59,502 --> 00:48:02,796
...so I'll be right back, okay?
514
00:48:05,758 --> 00:48:07,759
All right, go for it, partner.
515
00:48:07,927 --> 00:48:10,428
I mean, she's misplaced
her marble collection...
516
00:48:10,596 --> 00:48:12,097
...but definitely go for it.
517
00:48:12,265 --> 00:48:18,186
Chris, if I tell you something,
you promise to believe me?
518
00:48:19,647 --> 00:48:20,855
Of course.
519
00:48:22,817 --> 00:48:24,859
I think...
520
00:48:25,778 --> 00:48:28,446
...it was a zombie.
521
00:48:29,031 --> 00:48:32,367
And its head exploded...
522
00:48:32,535 --> 00:48:39,040
...and things like slugs
or something spilled out.
523
00:48:40,710 --> 00:48:42,711
Okay.
524
00:48:45,131 --> 00:48:47,549
Maybe I should walk you home.
525
00:49:06,110 --> 00:49:08,194
What about J.C.?
526
00:49:08,362 --> 00:49:11,823
I have a feeling
he went back to the dorms.
527
00:50:17,598 --> 00:50:19,307
Oh, my God.
528
00:50:23,104 --> 00:50:24,896
Oh, shit.
529
00:50:26,649 --> 00:50:28,608
Oh, my God.
530
00:50:45,793 --> 00:50:47,460
Shit.
531
00:50:48,254 --> 00:50:49,671
What the hell was that?
532
00:51:11,986 --> 00:51:13,862
Light.
533
00:51:14,029 --> 00:51:16,156
Come on. Come on.
534
00:51:16,323 --> 00:51:17,949
Okay.
535
00:51:22,037 --> 00:51:23,830
Come on.
536
00:51:49,857 --> 00:51:51,816
Oh, my God.
537
00:52:20,471 --> 00:52:22,388
I feel really stupid.
538
00:52:24,225 --> 00:52:25,475
I don't know.
539
00:52:25,643 --> 00:52:28,686
Maybe I'm going crazy
or something.
540
00:52:29,021 --> 00:52:32,857
Listen,
there's a formal tomorrow night...
541
00:52:33,025 --> 00:52:37,612
...and will you go with me?
542
00:52:39,240 --> 00:52:41,658
What? Really?
543
00:52:43,911 --> 00:52:46,204
Yeah, but what about Brad?
544
00:52:46,372 --> 00:52:47,705
Brad's an asshole.
545
00:52:47,873 --> 00:52:52,085
I know that, but aren't you guys-- ?
546
00:52:52,253 --> 00:52:54,671
Tomorrow night, okay?
547
00:52:58,050 --> 00:53:00,552
No more weird stuff.
548
00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:02,262
Thanks, Chris.
549
00:53:02,429 --> 00:53:03,972
Good night.
550
00:53:21,240 --> 00:53:25,326
Zombies, exploding heads...
551
00:53:25,953 --> 00:53:26,911
...creepy-crawlies
and a date for the formal.
552
00:53:26,912 --> 00:53:31,624
...creepy-crawlies
and a date for the formal.
553
00:53:32,167 --> 00:53:33,793
This is classic, Spanky.
554
00:53:39,425 --> 00:53:41,634
Tell me something, Spanky.
555
00:53:42,761 --> 00:53:45,054
Do you have
a high school sweetheart?
556
00:53:47,349 --> 00:53:48,391
Maybe.
557
00:53:50,853 --> 00:53:53,479
Well, whatever happened to her?
558
00:53:53,856 --> 00:53:55,815
I don't know, I blew it.
559
00:53:55,983 --> 00:53:58,192
She decided we didn't ever need
to talk again...
560
00:53:58,360 --> 00:54:00,320
...and went on with her life, I guess.
561
00:54:00,487 --> 00:54:02,238
Why?
562
00:54:02,406 --> 00:54:04,657
I had a high school sweetheart.
563
00:54:04,825 --> 00:54:06,326
So? What happened to her?
564
00:54:07,161 --> 00:54:08,745
I blew it.
565
00:54:09,496 --> 00:54:12,165
She decided
we didn't ever need to talk again.
566
00:54:13,667 --> 00:54:16,669
Me, I became a cop.
567
00:54:16,837 --> 00:54:21,841
I'd been a rookie about two weeks
when we got the call.
568
00:54:22,009 --> 00:54:27,221
Highway patrol,
they saw a car on the side of the road.
569
00:54:29,433 --> 00:54:31,768
They called it in, we responded.
570
00:54:31,936 --> 00:54:33,770
It was a couple.
571
00:54:33,938 --> 00:54:36,940
The guy's body was in the woods
20 yards from the car.
572
00:54:37,107 --> 00:54:39,484
My partner found him.
573
00:54:39,652 --> 00:54:41,527
I found the girl.
574
00:54:42,363 --> 00:54:44,364
I found her in the car.
575
00:54:45,658 --> 00:54:46,741
And on the road.
576
00:54:48,077 --> 00:54:49,869
And in the woods.
577
00:54:50,454 --> 00:54:52,956
Your high school sweetheart
went on with her life.
578
00:54:53,832 --> 00:54:57,877
Mine got hacked up
by a nutcase with an ax.
579
00:55:00,130 --> 00:55:02,507
But that's not the fun part.
580
00:55:03,592 --> 00:55:05,635
The fun part's what happened next.
581
00:55:06,971 --> 00:55:08,805
What happened next?
582
00:55:08,973 --> 00:55:10,223
Guess.
583
00:55:10,391 --> 00:55:12,225
- The police found him?
- Close.
584
00:55:13,227 --> 00:55:15,019
I found him.
585
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:19,816
It wasn't what you'd call
your routine police work either.
586
00:55:20,609 --> 00:55:23,653
- What would you call it?
- Revenge.
587
00:55:24,363 --> 00:55:27,615
See, I tracked him
during my off-hours.
588
00:55:28,200 --> 00:55:29,242
By yourself?
589
00:55:29,410 --> 00:55:31,369
Oh, no, no, no.
590
00:55:32,329 --> 00:55:34,747
I took my 12-gauge with me.
591
00:55:35,207 --> 00:55:37,542
I tracked him and I found him.
592
00:55:38,419 --> 00:55:40,545
And when I found him...
593
00:55:40,713 --> 00:55:44,132
...I leveled off that shotgun
right at his chest.
594
00:55:44,967 --> 00:55:46,592
Spanky, guess what happened next.
595
00:55:47,761 --> 00:55:49,804
Should you be telling me this?
596
00:55:50,264 --> 00:55:52,015
Close.
597
00:55:52,182 --> 00:55:53,850
I pulled the trigger.
598
00:55:55,227 --> 00:55:57,687
That's all real exciting
and everything...
599
00:55:57,855 --> 00:55:59,981
...but listen, I've got a mid-term--
600
00:56:00,149 --> 00:56:03,109
I wrapped his body in a plastic bag.
601
00:56:03,277 --> 00:56:05,236
I buried him in a vacant lot.
602
00:56:06,572 --> 00:56:09,699
The lot right behind
your girlfriend's sorority.
603
00:56:09,867 --> 00:56:11,743
Of course,
it isn't a vacant lot anymore.
604
00:56:13,662 --> 00:56:17,665
Now the housemother's cottage
is sitting right on top of it.
605
00:56:20,002 --> 00:56:23,629
Look, detective,
I don't mean to be rude or anything...
606
00:56:23,797 --> 00:56:28,259
...but other than just kind of wanting
to confess to a murder...
607
00:56:28,427 --> 00:56:30,094
...is there a point to this story?
608
00:56:30,763 --> 00:56:37,143
Spanky, that's exactly
what I'm trying to figure out.
609
00:56:40,189 --> 00:56:44,817
The old man left that home,
never to return again.
610
00:56:44,985 --> 00:56:48,237
As long as they can think,
we'll have our problems.
611
00:56:48,405 --> 00:56:50,531
But those whom we're using
cannot think.
612
00:56:50,699 --> 00:56:55,870
They are the dead, brought to a
simulated life by our electro-guns.
613
00:56:56,038 --> 00:56:57,914
You know, it's an interesting thing...
614
00:56:58,082 --> 00:57:00,750
...when you consider,
the Earth people who can think...
615
00:57:00,918 --> 00:57:03,377
...are so frightened
by those who cannot.
616
00:57:06,465 --> 00:57:09,842
Well, our ship should be regenerated.
We better get started.
617
00:58:07,234 --> 00:58:08,943
Thrill me.
618
00:58:26,253 --> 00:58:27,545
Cameron to Dispatch.
619
00:58:27,713 --> 00:58:29,714
Where the hell are my backups?
620
00:58:31,842 --> 00:58:33,467
What the...?
621
00:58:37,681 --> 00:58:39,557
Never mind.
622
00:58:55,073 --> 00:58:57,491
Check the neighborhood. Go ahead.
623
00:59:03,999 --> 00:59:07,501
She had a dog, but it took off
the second we kicked the door in.
624
00:59:12,132 --> 00:59:14,550
If we used a different stretcher
for every piece...
625
00:59:14,718 --> 00:59:16,844
...we'd be here all night.
626
00:59:27,147 --> 00:59:28,522
Forget it. Give it up.
627
00:59:28,690 --> 00:59:30,816
I don't see anything.
628
00:59:32,027 --> 00:59:33,319
A bit more.
629
00:59:33,487 --> 00:59:36,530
We checked the garage, checked
next door, checked that whole side.
630
00:59:36,698 --> 00:59:37,740
- And?
- Nothing.
631
00:59:37,908 --> 00:59:38,950
Check somewhere else.
632
00:59:39,117 --> 00:59:41,077
Don't come back
until you find something.
633
00:59:48,418 --> 00:59:50,169
You're right, this is stupid.
634
00:59:50,337 --> 00:59:51,712
Go.
635
00:59:55,008 --> 00:59:57,635
I said go, not stop.
636
01:00:05,852 --> 01:00:07,937
- Still nothing, sir.
- Wonderful.
637
01:00:08,105 --> 01:00:09,981
Wallace and Teague
are in the patrol car.
638
01:00:10,148 --> 01:00:11,983
Dante and DePalma
are on the other side.
639
01:00:12,150 --> 01:00:13,567
- Reach for Hoffman.
- Detective.
640
01:00:13,735 --> 01:00:14,819
I thought we were--
641
01:00:14,987 --> 01:00:16,946
We've sighted suspect
and we're in pursuit.
642
01:00:17,114 --> 01:00:19,573
Request immediate backup.
Repeat, we have the sucker.
643
01:00:19,741 --> 01:00:22,493
We got him. We got him.
644
01:00:23,203 --> 01:00:26,580
Get the 12-gauge out of my car,
now.
645
01:00:51,231 --> 01:00:53,441
Freeze.
646
01:01:03,869 --> 01:01:05,786
I already killed you.
647
01:01:05,954 --> 01:01:08,372
You son of a bitch,
I already killed you.
648
01:02:01,843 --> 01:02:05,137
- What's going on?
- Oh, Paul, have you seen J.C.?
649
01:02:05,305 --> 01:02:06,889
He never came home last night.
650
01:02:07,057 --> 01:02:09,517
Last time I saw him,
you guys took off with that babe.
651
01:02:09,684 --> 01:02:12,978
Hey, Chris, what's the tux for, huh?
652
01:03:54,372 --> 01:03:56,081
Chris.
653
01:03:58,084 --> 01:04:00,586
There's one inside me.
654
01:04:01,963 --> 01:04:04,298
It got in through my mouth.
655
01:04:05,550 --> 01:04:07,843
I can feel it.
656
01:04:09,304 --> 01:04:11,639
It's in my brain.
657
01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:20,231
I don't have a pulse or a heartbeat.
658
01:04:21,066 --> 01:04:23,067
I think I'm dead.
659
01:04:25,946 --> 01:04:27,905
I killed one.
660
01:04:28,073 --> 01:04:30,449
I lit a match to it.
661
01:04:30,617 --> 01:04:33,619
I think fire will kill them.
662
01:04:35,247 --> 01:04:39,917
I've gone to the furnace room,
the basement.
663
01:04:41,586 --> 01:04:43,796
If I don't come back...
664
01:04:45,924 --> 01:04:48,384
...heat will kill them.
665
01:04:52,597 --> 01:04:54,265
I walked, Chris.
666
01:04:54,432 --> 01:04:57,101
All by myself, I walked.
667
01:05:02,649 --> 01:05:04,692
I love you.
668
01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:09,738
Good luck with Cynthia.
669
01:06:40,789 --> 01:06:42,915
Let's go, bros.
670
01:06:45,710 --> 01:06:47,586
Hey, Cunningham,
where's Brad, man?
671
01:06:47,754 --> 01:06:50,172
I think he's bagging
the formal action.
672
01:06:50,340 --> 01:06:51,590
I think Cindy blew him off.
673
01:06:51,758 --> 01:06:54,426
Oh, bogus, man.
He must be bummed.
674
01:06:54,594 --> 01:06:55,844
Really.
675
01:07:06,523 --> 01:07:08,190
Bitch.
676
01:07:14,114 --> 01:07:16,156
What the fuck?
677
01:07:21,955 --> 01:07:26,291
Hey, dog, did you see that thing?
678
01:07:30,714 --> 01:07:32,464
Let's go, come on.
679
01:07:32,632 --> 01:07:34,383
Let's go.
680
01:07:35,593 --> 01:07:37,636
We're out of here.
681
01:07:37,804 --> 01:07:39,638
Let's blow this pop stand.
682
01:07:39,806 --> 01:07:42,599
We're going to get done, dudes.
683
01:08:34,694 --> 01:08:36,862
What?
684
01:08:37,322 --> 01:08:38,864
They got Alfalfa.
685
01:08:40,533 --> 01:08:42,868
They get in through your mouth...
686
01:08:44,370 --> 01:08:47,080
...and then they lay eggs
in your brain...
687
01:08:49,709 --> 01:08:52,461
...and you walk around
while they incubate.
688
01:08:54,339 --> 01:08:57,466
And you walk around
even if you're dead.
689
01:09:23,993 --> 01:09:25,869
Wonderful.
690
01:09:46,891 --> 01:09:48,100
Come on, you guys.
691
01:09:48,268 --> 01:09:50,727
Settle down or I'll stop the bus.
692
01:10:07,120 --> 01:10:08,120
Hi, Walt.
693
01:10:08,288 --> 01:10:10,122
Well, well, well,
Detective Ray Cameron.
694
01:10:10,290 --> 01:10:13,625
- Son of a gun, is that really you?
- It's me, all right. How's by you?
695
01:10:13,793 --> 01:10:17,462
Hey, can't complain.
Cannot complain, Raymond.
696
01:10:18,464 --> 01:10:20,382
Hi, sport.
697
01:10:20,800 --> 01:10:22,676
Pretty fancy set of duds
you got on there.
698
01:10:22,844 --> 01:10:26,305
What is it, Halloween or something,
Ray? Hey, kid, I'm only kidding.
699
01:10:27,724 --> 01:10:30,100
So, what can I do you for?
700
01:10:30,685 --> 01:10:35,022
Well, the thing is, Walter,
what I need is...
701
01:10:35,189 --> 01:10:36,982
...I need your basic flamethrower.
702
01:10:37,150 --> 01:10:39,568
Flamethrower? Flamethrower?
703
01:10:39,736 --> 01:10:41,069
Yeah.
704
01:10:41,237 --> 01:10:43,447
Flamethrower? Jesus.
705
01:10:43,615 --> 01:10:46,867
What's the matter? The old snub-nose
ain't good enough for you anymore?
706
01:10:47,035 --> 01:10:50,662
Yeah, I know. Just bring out
the old heavy artillery, will you, Walt?
707
01:10:50,830 --> 01:10:55,834
We got one slingshot and one BB gun
and one flamethrower.
708
01:10:57,420 --> 01:10:58,503
There you go.
709
01:10:59,422 --> 01:11:00,839
Gotta watch out for this baby.
710
01:11:01,007 --> 01:11:02,466
Light the pilot, it goes out...
711
01:11:02,634 --> 01:11:04,885
...and it plays hard to get
like a son of a bitch.
712
01:11:05,053 --> 01:11:08,263
- Thanks.
- So if you let me have the requisition.
713
01:11:08,431 --> 01:11:12,225
Oh, well, the thing is....
714
01:11:12,393 --> 01:11:14,645
Oh, the thing is, Walter, I....
715
01:11:16,022 --> 01:11:19,358
I don't have a requisition form
is the thing.
716
01:11:20,360 --> 01:11:23,695
You don't? Well, jeez.
717
01:11:23,863 --> 01:11:26,698
To tell you the truth, Ray,
there could be a little problem.
718
01:11:26,866 --> 01:11:28,450
Yeah.
719
01:11:32,121 --> 01:11:33,705
There could be a little problem.
720
01:12:12,912 --> 01:12:13,954
Well, I'm so sure.
721
01:12:14,122 --> 01:12:17,749
Don't everybody run to answer
the door at once.
722
01:12:17,917 --> 01:12:19,626
Guy.
723
01:12:25,466 --> 01:12:27,092
I'm so sure.
724
01:12:27,260 --> 01:12:29,928
Very hilarious, Brad.
725
01:12:30,763 --> 01:12:33,724
Cindy, Brad's here.
726
01:13:57,183 --> 01:13:59,851
I was gonna call you.
727
01:14:02,522 --> 01:14:07,651
Look,
I'm sorry things didn't work out.
728
01:14:08,361 --> 01:14:11,029
We're just two different people.
729
01:14:11,197 --> 01:14:14,783
That doesn't mean
that it's over forever.
730
01:14:14,951 --> 01:14:17,244
We just need time to think.
731
01:14:17,411 --> 01:14:19,121
Cynthia, get away from it.
732
01:14:36,222 --> 01:14:39,391
Sorry, Brad. Don't take it personal.
733
01:14:43,980 --> 01:14:45,897
Hey, who are you?
734
01:14:46,065 --> 01:14:47,357
I'm gonna call the police.
735
01:14:47,525 --> 01:14:50,402
You do that. Now.
736
01:14:51,195 --> 01:14:52,988
I'm sorry.
737
01:14:53,156 --> 01:14:54,948
I didn't know that it was....
738
01:14:55,116 --> 01:14:57,784
Here, hold this, you'll feel better.
739
01:15:11,174 --> 01:15:13,800
I've got good news
and bad news, girls.
740
01:15:13,968 --> 01:15:15,969
The good news is
your dates are here.
741
01:15:16,137 --> 01:15:17,387
What's the bad news?
742
01:15:18,055 --> 01:15:19,306
They're dead.
743
01:15:19,473 --> 01:15:20,932
Shit.
744
01:15:21,100 --> 01:15:22,225
Oh, shit.
745
01:15:22,393 --> 01:15:23,560
Cynthia, look.
746
01:15:23,728 --> 01:15:26,771
Look,
you squeeze this thing to fire, okay?
747
01:15:27,106 --> 01:15:30,692
Jesus, Cynthia. Try and fire it.
748
01:15:30,860 --> 01:15:32,944
Do something, damn it!
749
01:15:35,448 --> 01:15:37,073
Well, don't go out there.
750
01:15:37,241 --> 01:15:40,118
So fire when I do, okay?
751
01:15:40,286 --> 01:15:42,287
Are you ready?
752
01:15:43,789 --> 01:15:45,373
Now!
753
01:15:49,837 --> 01:15:52,255
You. Lock those doors.
754
01:16:06,437 --> 01:16:07,687
Duck.
755
01:16:08,648 --> 01:16:09,731
It's Miller time.
756
01:17:14,630 --> 01:17:16,506
Don't these creeps
take no for an answer?
757
01:17:16,674 --> 01:17:17,924
How many of them are there?
758
01:17:18,092 --> 01:17:20,176
Come on, come on. Shoot him.
759
01:17:20,344 --> 01:17:22,387
It's jammed.
760
01:17:29,103 --> 01:17:31,563
Give me a fucking break.
761
01:17:38,696 --> 01:17:40,864
Here, come on.
762
01:17:59,342 --> 01:18:00,592
Real good plan.
763
01:18:13,564 --> 01:18:15,607
Oh, my God.
764
01:18:34,418 --> 01:18:36,294
Chris.
765
01:18:36,796 --> 01:18:39,631
Chris. Chris.
766
01:18:39,799 --> 01:18:41,883
Chris.
767
01:18:54,480 --> 01:18:56,606
Get out of there.
768
01:18:57,274 --> 01:18:58,650
Go.
769
01:19:02,696 --> 01:19:04,364
Later, dude.
770
01:19:30,057 --> 01:19:31,599
Holy shit, the basement.
771
01:19:31,767 --> 01:19:32,892
What's in the basement?
772
01:19:33,060 --> 01:19:36,187
Storage, boxes.
773
01:19:38,357 --> 01:19:41,359
One of the girl's science projects.
774
01:19:44,655 --> 01:19:47,490
- Oh, my--
- Get out of the house.
775
01:19:51,704 --> 01:19:54,456
Get out of the house.
776
01:19:58,210 --> 01:20:00,837
Get out of the house now.
777
01:20:50,221 --> 01:20:51,763
No, no. Get out.
778
01:20:51,931 --> 01:20:55,183
Get out, get out of here.
Take her and get out.
779
01:20:55,351 --> 01:20:57,268
Get the hell out of here.
780
01:21:09,657 --> 01:21:11,616
Wonderful.
781
01:21:18,666 --> 01:21:21,125
Don't even think about it,
you little son of a bitch.
782
01:21:24,088 --> 01:21:26,339
Twenty.
783
01:21:36,809 --> 01:21:38,643
Nineteen.
784
01:21:47,987 --> 01:21:49,988
Eighteen.
785
01:21:56,203 --> 01:21:58,580
Seventeen.
786
01:22:01,166 --> 01:22:03,001
Sixteen.
787
01:22:06,463 --> 01:22:09,966
Thirteen, 12, 11.
788
01:22:12,052 --> 01:22:16,222
Ten, nine...
789
01:22:16,390 --> 01:22:20,143
...eight, seven...
790
01:22:20,644 --> 01:22:21,728
...six....
791
01:22:22,354 --> 01:22:28,860
Five, four, three....
792
01:22:32,197 --> 01:22:33,948
One.
793
01:22:35,618 --> 01:22:38,578
Detective, thrill me.
794
01:23:27,002 --> 01:23:28,753
Nice tux.
56411
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