Original subtitles

Dear diary, nobody's going to see this tape of me. I'm going to destroy it

after I'm done.

But I really need to work out this problem.

My life is the problem.

And my therapist is right.

If I can't talk to my friends, I can't write it down, I can't talk to her, then

who am I going to talk to?

I'm sick, and I really want to get better.

I pray to God to relieve this fire inside of me.

I just... So I'm talking to you. My video diary will help me work

through it and get it out of me.

My problem is my stepson, Tyler.

I think that we both want... Oh my gosh.

I think we both want more.

from our relationship.

Ty?

It was years ago when Tyler was still living with us.

He was a junior in college and his father was just going crazy saying he

had to get out of our house and find his own place because we could smell the pot

coming out of his room.

But Tyler swore that we were crazy.

So I went into his room to snoop around.

I looked on his laptop.

I was appalled.

It was some website on the dark web where men come together to talk about

their fantasies about their mothers.

I mean, I'm his stepmother, but I never knew he felt so passionately

about me. I was offended, disgusted.

And completely turned on.

Not my Tyler.

Up came a video with a blonde woman who looked a lot like me. Bull busted.

The boy.

Well, he looked a lot like Tyler, too.

He can't be watching that smut in our house. What would his father say?

Oh, my goodness. I can't tell his father. Their relationship would be

tainted forever.

This is something that I have to confront him on. I will figure this out

on my own.

I will confront him.

I will.

I know this feeling.

Butterflies in my stomach.

My skin begging to be touched.

I am not turned on by my steps on. I am not.

It might be a good idea just to go ahead and get this over with.

Hey, Mom!

Our team is on!

I'll be there in a moment, baby.

So I thought, I'm going to go and I'm going to turn off the TV and sit in

front of him and confront him about the pot.

Hey, I'm missing it.

Hey, what's going on?

What's up?

We have to talk about something important.

Is everything okay?

You tell me. Is everything okay?

Oh, God. All right.

Tell me what Dad's pissed off about, and I'll try to fix whatever it is. This

isn't about your father.

Yeah, sure it is. He told you to tell me this, but come on, out with it. What is

it? You turn off the game in mid-play.

I won't judge.

I promise.

You can confide in me.

You can tell me anything.

I won't judge you.

Really? Is something bothering you?

Tell me. Confide in me.

I promise I won't judge. You can tell me anything.

I might even have the perfect release.

Really?

Under pressure, son?

Tell me.

Baby,

you can tell me anything.

Give it to me.

Hey, Dad. What's going on?

Hi, honey.

Tom was so disappointed that I didn't confront Ty about the pot, and so he

did.

And Ty got so upset that he left, and we didn't see him for four long years.

But I kept in touch with him on FacePage, on the phone, and I even

joined his website.

Dear Sir Son, My advice is to tell her how you feel.

Call her. Go back to her.

Kiss her.

Kiss her with a closed mouth.

Let your lips linger on hers.

If she reacts badly, you could apologize for too much.

Tyler!

Oh, I tried to play it cool, but he was telling me how he felt so overworked.

And I recommended, oh, well, you could go on vacation, go to Europe for a

couple weeks, or you could try and save some money and come and stay with us.

It's been so long since we've seen you.

So he did come and stay with us for two weeks.

And the first day, he spent with his dad and I.

And the second day, he went out to the tavern with his friends.

And, well, when he came home,

I missed you, Mom. I missed you.

I could smell the vodka on his breath,

and I knew he was not himself.

Honey. What, you have to work in those heels all day and then come home and do

chores in them too? Why don't I wash and you dry?

Hey, what's up dad?

I felt him.

He was passionate.

He was strong.

He was hard.

I could feel him pressing up against my... Oh, goodness. I can't believe I'm

defending him to a camcorder.

He forgot who he was, who I was.

Or maybe he was taking my advice and making his move.

But it was ruined yet again.

I didn't see Tyler for the rest of the day.

He said he was going for a walk, but I heard his bedroom door shut when I was

laying in bed with his father.

Then my mind started to drift and imagine what could have happened

if we weren't interrupted.

Every way I wanted him to touch me.

Everything I wanted to say to him.

But in my dreams, well... Let me tell you how it

plays out.

Tyler.

Tyler, what are you doing? I'm your stepmother.

No, you are a woman. And a woman with needs.

And that man has no idea how to do it. That man is your father.

I'm so dignified. Don't you think?

Kiss me.

No.

Kiss me.

I want you.

And you want me. And that's the only way.

Kiss me.

Kiss me.

No.

Fine. Then you tell me that you don't want me.

Yes. Yes, I want you.

Oh, God, yes.

Oh,

Tyler. Oh.

taken over by him.

He's strong.

He's passionate. I want him to make me feel that it's okay.

Oh, yes.

Oh, baby.

Yeah, stroke it.

Mmhmm.

My sweet, sweet boy.

Tyler,

my sweet, sweet boy.

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes.

Oh,

Tyler. Oh, baby boy. Oh, yes.

My husband is a deep sleeper. He could have woken up at any moment. I was

scared, but the dream felt so real.

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes.

Oh.

Oh. Oh, yes.

Yes!

been sleeping, but I didn't get caught so why should

I feel guilty?

It makes me think, is it wrong to dream about sinful things if nobody knows

about it?

Imagine if my boy wants me as much as I want him.

What if it was only once?

And nobody would ever know.

Would I be so bold as to make a pact with Ty?

To do it just once and never talk about it again?

Just to make the fantasy taste a little sweeter?

A little more real?

A few days went by and our family went back to normal.

But I haven't been able to look them in the eye scared of

what I would do given the opportunity.

Because it's just a fantasy. It's a dream.

And fantasies are meant to be hidden.

I'd asked Tyler to go visit his grandmother at Widening Oaks Group Home.

I thought it'd be really nice for them both.

It was laundry day, and when I was washing out his clothes,

I smelled them.

I don't need to tell you what I did on his bed.

I'm sure you can imagine.

And I got out all of my old, beautiful lace, silk,

stockings, all my nice lingerie that I had gotten years ago

with naughty intentions.

And I thought by washing them by hand would make them new again.

And then I could put them on on my new, fit body.

I like... to imagine I'm a different person all the time.

And with him, I could be brand new, no strings attached.

Hey! Tyler!

I wasn't expecting you home so soon.

Sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you.

What's going on with all the laundry we're looking at?

Oh, no, that's not laundry, that's lingerie.

And they have to lay flat to dry. They cannot go in the dryer.

Oh, okay.

Hey!

Oh, I'm sorry.

What is your wet panties doing? Did my wet panties dirty your trousers, sweet

boy?

Is that my computer?

What are you... Oh,

yes, honey. I'm downloading a spreadsheet for work. Mr. Lee wanted me

to have the books done by Monday. And I don't have a computer of my own. I hope

you don't mind.

Uh...

No, it's just funny you decided to use my computer. You sound annoyed. Oh, I'm

so sorry. Your father's computer has a passcode on it. And I swear, I didn't

look at any of your personal files or folders.

And I thought you had to be done with this before you got home. You were

supposed to be with your grandmother all afternoon.

Lie.

I don't know why I lied.

I knew he said he'd be back in a couple of hours.

I also know...

full well, that I could have laid them out in my bed like I always do to dry.

But I wanted him to see them. After all I mentioned, I have been working out.

And this is the best my body has looked since I was in school.

I'm proud of it.

And this was my subtle way of flirting with him.

The idea backfired.

No, no, no, no, no, no. It's totally fine.

Absolutely fine. How about this? How about we go shopping right now and we

can get you your own computer?

Oh, no. I couldn't accept such an expensive gift. Please, no, no, no, no.

It would be... I insist.

Oh, okay. A cheapy one, then.

No, Mom. You deserve nothing but the best.

Oh.

It's done.

Okay.

It's going to be quite a challenge to move all of his records over to new file

lockers.

Oh, damn this thing.

You're making fun of me. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry. Here, let me give

you some help.

Okay,

so you'll want to open up the programs, and then... Scroll down to the files.

There you go. Those are all the files that are downloaded today. There you go.

Yeah. There it is.

So I just select this blue icon and put in all my information there?

Yep. There you go. All good. Oh, no. Don't go anywhere. I might need you.

Okay.

Oh,

here we are.

Yeah, there you go. That's the program. It's running. Okay.

So now it's just going to give you step-by-step of how to actually run the

program.

So who won?

So it was right then and there that I knew that he wanted me to.

His cock was so hard, raging hard, and I

wanted to drive him wild. I wanted his cock just to...

It would be so hard to rip through his pants.

I wanted to drive him so crazy that he just lost control.

When you get through with the first step and you understand it, you just click

next and it will just move you on to the next step and so on and so on and so on.

It's asking me if I want to put this icon on my laptop.

You could do that. You know what? Actually, no, no, no. We'll just put the

icon on your new laptop when we finally get you one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll

just click next and on to the next part where you put in your information, I

think.

Yeah, there you go.

Oh, so I'm moving all of these.

Entries from column to column.

Oh, yeah.

Uh-uh.

Danger. Oh, my God. Nothing.

You didn't just see that, did you? See what?

Nothing. Those are actually called spams.

They kind of affect your computer every once in a while, but your computer's not

going to have any of that. Believe me, it's going to be new and it's going to

be totally fresh. It's fine.

Oh, that's okay.

Really? Yeah.

Okay.

Oh.

Oh.

So.

Oh, yes.

Is this uncomfortable?

No, no. So, let's just look.

So I guess it's asking you to organize the numbers and the columns.

Oh, yeah.

I could just manipulate the number.

Your silk stocking is 43.

No, you're not.

Take me.

Good as you are in my dream.

Baby boy.

Not this again?

Shh. Oh, yes, shh.

Shh.

Hmm.

Goddamnit

Ugh.

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes.

Oh, my sweet boy.

Oh, yes.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Yes.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Yes, we must be quiet.

Oh, yes. Oh, baby.

You feel so good, Nami.

Oh, yes.

Oh, she feels so good.

Oh, my God. Oh, yes.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Jesus Christ.

Oh, my God.

It's cold.

Oh, yes.

Yes, baby.

I want you to come inside of me. I want to feel you inside of me, baby.

Oh, sweet boy, come inside of mommy.

Oh, yes.

When can I see you again?

Tonight.

I'll come to your room.

I can't wait.

I'm in love with my husband.

And I'm in love and lust with Tyler.

It's not like one love is better than the other. It's just different.

Tyler's hunger grows for me every time I encounter him and I know I should be

faithful.

I should honor the promises I made.